oh god you guys are so nice

sylphofvoid  asked:

You actually got me into the Arctic monkeys a few years back!! I've been following you since you did the SNK parody videos, I've watched every episode of Bone Zone and I love all the voice acting clips you've done the last couple of years. You seem like a really chill guy and you're a super nice, benevolent presence on my dash! Keep it real Kuu, you're one of the greats (ノ´ヮ´)ノ*:・゚✧

oh my god how sweet! I’m always so happy to hear from people that’ve been there through all or most of my prospects. it honestly means a lot when people just genuinely enjoy things because of my involvement in them <3

kairosmalificus  asked:

OH MY GOD OK I JUST HAVE TO SCREAM OVER THIS BECAUSE I JUST FOUND YOUR BLESSING OF AN EXISTENCE AND I CAME ACROSS YOUR ART OF ALLURA IN THE LONG WHITE GOWN (wedding dress-esque with lace) AND I JUST GOT A DRESS FOR MY SHALLURA WEDDING AND IT LOOKS SO SIMILAR AND I WAS WONDERING IF I COULD LIKE..RECREATE THAT PHOTOSET?!?!

FIRST OF ALL


you are literally the sweetest, oh my god, bless your heart and soul for liking my blog and content. That means a lot to me. jdjjsoxjdk.

SECOND

PLEASE?? Please, please, please do so. And then link me it so I can fawn over it and reblog the hell out of it, okay thanks bye. Lmaaao. 💕

Sheriff Knows Best

Stiles/Derek, G, 2K words, Sheriff POV, Coffeeshop AU, matchmaker!Sheriff

(Credit for the title to @cobrilee!)

This is an expansion of the following idea, written by the lovely @artemis69:

the coffee!AU, where John goes to the same coffee shop every day, and there is this very grumpy, quiet barista that always makes him amazing coffee and keep the best pastries for him. And one day the Sheriff learns that Derek is the one to bake them all, so he decides: this will be my son in law, I need a reason to have this man in my family for at least forty to fifty years. Then he matchmakes with no subtility whatsoever, basically offering his only son on a silver plate, Stiles spluttering all the way (but he takes Derek’s number anyway because the guy is just amazingly cute)

John’s on his regular morning stroll when he stops in his tracks and takes in the brand-new coffee shop, complete with a banner advertising their opening day. The little corner space has been boarded up for over a year, and John had no idea it was opening today.

Any new businesses are a boon for Beacon Hills, especially family-run ones like this one is rumored to be, so John ducks inside. It’s warm and homey, and there’s a pair of young dark-haired people behind the counter, close enough in features that they’re probably siblings. The quiet bickering points that direction, too.

They stop, though, when they see the Sheriff—the uniform tends to have that effect—and he pastes on his public servant smile. “Hi there. I saw this place was open and wanted to come on in and introduce myself. Sheriff John Stilinski.”

“Oh, it’s so nice to meet you,” the woman says, holding out her hand for a shake. A nice strong grip—John likes this girl already. “I’m Laura Hale, and I own this place with my brother Derek, our resident grumpy barista-slash-baker.”

Derek rolls his eyes at Laura, but his smile to John is genuine, if small. “Hi, Sheriff. Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise, son,” he says, perusing the case full of tempting sugary treats. “You made these?”

He nods. “Can I get you anything?”

John hums. “A medium coffee, and…any one of these delicious-looking goodies. You pick. Just don’t tell my son,” he adds, and Derek looks up at him.

“Your son?”

“I have slightly elevated cholesterol,” he says, stressing the word. “Nothing to worry about, honestly. But he polices my diet. I don’t think he knows about this place yet, though, so this is great.”

Derek hums. His tongs hover over a muffin—lemon poppyseed, it looks like—before moving to another one. Raspberry-almond, according to the sign, and well, John isn’t picky. Derek drops it into a little bag and hands it over.

“Happy to help,” he says.

John thanks him and opens the bag. Laura’s still pouring his coffee, but it smells so damn good that he can’t resist.

“Wow,” he says, his mouth full. “This is delicious.”

Derek looks quietly proud, and Laura claps him on the shoulder as she reaches over to hand John his coffee. “On the house, today, Sheriff,” she says. “Thanks for stopping by.”

“I’ll be back tomorrow,” he promises.


“Thanks, Nina,” John says dryly, leaning back so she can put his plate in front of him.

“You’re welcome, Sheriff,” she says with a friendly smile, ignoring his stink eye.

Stiles just grins at both of them and digs into his French toast. He insists on having their weekly father-son breakfast at Paulie’s Diner because no matter what John orders, Nina will only bring him an egg-white omelet with a dry English muffin. Stiles must have some serious blackmail or be paying her off somehow, and John is, he has to admit, grudgingly impressed.

“Don’t look so bummed out, Pops,” Stiles says, around a mouthful of what’s surely syrup-drenched deliciousness. “At least I let you have turkey bacon.”

“It’s not the same,” he says grumpily, poking at it. “But at least I’m getting a steady stream of baked goods now.”

Stiles glares at him. “Are you serious? From where? I thought I had paid everyone off.”

He knew it. “I’m not telling you,” he says, a little displeased with how childish he sounds.

“Fine,” Stiles says, sniffing. “I’ll figure it out, you know I will.”

He will, John knows. Goddamn, he loves his kid, even if his life goal seems to be depriving John from any and all delicious food. “And speaking of, I met someone the other day,” he starts, and Stiles gasps theatrically, his hand coming up to cover his mouth.

“Is this you crapping all over my dream of having Melissa as my stepmom?”

John sighs at the reminder. Melissa is…well, she seems happy with that Argent guy. Whatever. He’s not bitter.

“Not for me, Jesus,” he says, shaking his head. “For you.”

“Oh my god,” Stiles says, slumping back in the booth. “Eye roll” is too mild, John thinks. It’s more of a whole head roll. “Seriously, Dad, I’m only 25. You don’t have to marry me off quite yet. You’ll get your grandchildren someday, I promise. Stop trying to set me up with people.”

“I’m just trying to be helpful!” John protests. “He seems nice.”

And makes really good treats, he adds in his head. That’ll be a good trait for a son-in-law.

“And who exactly is he?”

John pauses. “I met him at the aforementioned undisclosed location.” 

Stiles snorts. “Find out if he actually likes dudes, then get back to me.”

“Okay,” he says seriously, and Stiles grimaces.

“No, Dad, don’t actually—”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

What do you think about an “i picked up your bag at the airport but i can’t find your number so i’m about to embark on the largest scavenger hunt of all time by using your strange belongings to track you down” au with charmer or nurseydex or zimbits or something??

Well, I don’t know if you expected three mini fics, and I didn’t fully follow the prompt, but here we are.

1. Charmer

Look, Chris knew it was dumb. He knew that everyone on earth had a plain black suitcase, he knew he should have double-checked the luggage tag, he knew it was important to be sure abut these things. But knowing what he should have done couldn’t help him when he finally got his suitcase home and opened it up to find mostly yoga pants and sundresses. 

Fuck.

He zipped the bag back up and flipped open the luggage tag. It was cute, pink with some metallic lettering saying “I’m outta here!” in a handwritten font. Chris blamed jetlag and the redeye flight for making him miss the fact that it wasn’t his Sharks tag. He blamed the bag’s owner for not filling out any of the information on the tag.

Dammit.

Well, sorry random girl, he thought. He opened the suitcase up again to try to see if he could find anything that would give him a clue as to who the suitcase owner was. He moved a makeup bag aside, and hit gold immediately. Well, Samwell red. A Women’s Volleyball tshirt– mystery suitcase girl had to be on the volleyball team.

“Hey Ransom!” he yelled. “You’re facebook friends with all the volleyball team right?”

“He’s friends with everyone on campus!” Holster yelled back.

“Ask their captain if anyone flew in from the Bay Area and lost their luggage!”

_X_

“Is Justin here? My captain said he’s got my suitcase.” Chris overheard her at the door. He grabbed the bag and started hauling it downstairs. As he set it down at the bottom and caught sight of the girl in the doorway, he froze. She was pretty. Like, really pretty. 

“Um, hi,” he said.

“So you’re Justin? Oh my god, I’m so glad it wasn’t some total rando who got my bag.” 

“I’m actually Chris, Justin was just the one who was friends with your captain. Um, I’m sorry, but I kind of had to look through your stuff? Your luggage tag wasn’t filled out.” The girl laughed.

“Yours wasn’t either! Me and my teammates were like one minute away from googling the record holder for most San Jose Sharks merch, but it totally makes sense that you’re on the hockey team.” 

“Since we both forgot to write our numbers down, maybe we should do that now?” Chris suggested. The girl grinned, grabbed his phone out of his hand, and opened up a new contact. She punched in a number, and when she handed it back he saw a text of several random emojis addressed to the new contact of “Caitlin Farmer” with a girl farmer emoji and a volleyball emoji.

“Text me sometime, and maybe we can get dinner?” she said, and she was gone with her suitcase. 

Chris collapsed on the couch, a dreamy look in his eyes.

“Chowder? You get your suitcase back?” Bitty called out from the kitchen.

“Yeah! and I think I’m in love now!”

2. Nurseydex

“Cheryl, I’m telling you, I had a ton of inspiration on the plane and I wrote some great stuff for act three. No. No, it wasn’t just me thinking it’s great because I popped some melatonin and got really sleepy. It’s like, legit. Yeah, I’ll send it over as soon as I get home and–”

Derek slammed into something. If he’d been holding his phone in his hand (bluetooth is a blessing when you drop stuff easily) it would have launched across the airport. As it was, his post-flight latte was soaking through the nice white shirt of the handsome stranger in front of him.

“Shit,” the stranger said, looking down to survey the damage.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have trusted myself to make a phone call and not be clumsy after such a long flight,” Derek said. He set his briefcase down and pulled a wad of napkins out of the outside pocket. The guy took a deep breath, going from murderous to calm in a few seconds. 

“I wasn’t looking where I was going either, it’s not your fault,” the guy said, setting down his own briefcase and accepting the napkins. He blotted at his shirt.

“Let me pay for the dry cleaning. Or a replacement,” Derek offered. The man shook his head.

“It’s fine, it probably needed to go to the cleaners anyways.” He checked his watch. “If I run, I can probably get a new one before my meeting.” He wadded the napkins into one big ball, picked up his briefcase, and walked towards the exit with a terse nod. Derek, feeling terrible about the whole thing, picked up his own briefcase and walked to baggage claim.

By the time he was reunited with his home office, a cozy bookshelf-lined room in his brownstone, he had almost forgotten about the coffee incident. He was focused on sending the manuscript to Cheryl. Unfortunately, that was going to be difficult, considering he pulled a PC laptop out of the bag instead of his Mac.

Derek stared at the computer for a full minute. He almost couldn’t believe that this was happening to him. Hesitantly, he opened the laptop. On one side of the keyboard there was a weird thing that a few seconds of phone googling told him was a fingerprint scanner. Shit. He hit the space bar experimentally. Something flashed on the screen, and then was replaced with just a plain black screen with red text: ACCESS DENIED

Derek swore. He started to look through the rest of what was in the briefcase, but was disappointed to find it empty except for the laptop’s charger, three packs of gum, and receipts from a lobster shack in Maine. Shit. Nothing in here would tell him anything about the redhead he’d launched a latte at. 

He closed the laptop dejectedly, ignored his editor’s text messages, and went into the kitchen to make himself lunch and feel sorry for himself. This was the universe punishing him for covering a cute guy with coffee. If he had just kept his focus and waited to call his editor later, he could have sent the draft along and saved it and not be desperately trying to remember his inspiration.

Just as the self-pity spiral was really taking off, the doorbell rang. Derek sighed, put down his tea, and walked to the door. When he opened it, it wasn’t Girl Scouts or Jehovah’s Witnesses, but the guy from the airport.

“Cancel whatever you’re doing today, I need to teach you the most basic principles of digital security,” the guy said, pushing past Derek into the dining room. He shoved a stack of papers onto a chair and pulled Derek’s laptop out.

“I’m Will, by the way, I make software that’s hopefully a step ahead of viruses.”

“Is the draft still there?”

“The draft of what?” The guy looked confused.

“My third act breakthrough. I’m a novelist, I need to get it to my editor and I couldn’t remember if I saved it,” Derek explained.

“You know you can set up an auto-save every five minutes or so, right?” Will asked.

“This might be surprising to you, but I’ve never had a cute guy storm into my house and yell at me about computers before.” Will looked up from Derek’s computer, blushing.

“I haven’t had a cute guy dump a gallon of coffee all over me and steal my laptop before, either, but here we are.”

“Maybe you can yell about computers over lunch with me?”

3. Zimbits

Button downs. Tank tops. Slacks. Shorts. Three rolling pins. A pie tin. A half-emptied multipack of sharpies.

No lucky puck. No clothes in his size. No jerseys.

Jack sighed. It would just be too much to ask for anything to go well today. He picked up his phone to call someone with the Falconers, in the hope that they could talk to the airline and sort all this out. At the same time, his phone lit up with Tater’s face.

“Zimmboni! Look on twitter. Small internet baker has your suitcase!” Tater hung up before he could reply, so Jack just opened twitter instead. 

omgcheckplease: A bunch of pucks, some dirty jerseys, and a history textbook. Either I’m back in college or this isn’t my suitcase.

omgcheckplease: .@falcsofficial please tell your #1 player to DM me and come get his shit

omgcheckplease: and @falcsofficial tell him to give me my shit back. my hockey days are in the past, I need rolling pins, not a mouthguard

Jack smiled and laughed in the way a person laughs when they’re alone, just blowing more air than normal out of his nose. He looked through the twitter for a minute– the guy, Eric Bittle, was a Providence-based chef, whose latest tweets were mostly greetings to the various cities he’d been visiting on tour. Jack clicked the media tab on the account, and looked through the pictures. Bittle was cute. He wrote a reply.

zimmboni: .@omgcheckplease how do I send u a DM

omgcheckplease: .@zimmboni you don’t deserve to be verified, oh my god #verifybittle2k17

A few seconds later another notification popped up, and he tapped it to be brought to a DM window.

omgcheckplease: hey! sorry about the mixup. I can only imagine how confused you were to find all my book tour stuff.

zimmboni: Probably as confused as you were finding hockey stuff?

omgcheckplease: I wasn’t joking in my tweets, I did play hockey before I got into the whole cookbook/food show thing

zimmboni: Exactly, I did a book tour last year in the off-season :-)

omgcheckplease: oh my gosh, isn’t it the best and the worst?

zimmboni: I know. It’s great to meet people and talk about your work, but it’s exhausting.

omgcheckplease: that’s why I’m so excited to be back in Providence! at least until the next cookbook.

zimmboni: Well we should probably meet up to trade suitcases. Want to meet somewhere for dinner?

omgcheckplease: don’t trust me to learn where your house is?

zimmboni: I mean, if dinner goes well enough…

omgcheckplease: OH. okay, then, Mr. Zimmermann, it’s a date.

Jack smiled to himself, and got ready for his date.

superheroes - peter parker

Originally posted by magneteers

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader (Tony Stark friendship with reader and Peter as well)

Summary: Peter and Ned are keeping something from Y/N, and she is determined to find out what. But, can she without letting her secret slip through too?

Warnings:none

Requested: Yes (anonymous)

Here’s another imagine for y'all! Hope you like it! It’s a little long lol. Some of y'all were asking about a masterlist and yes! Below:

MASTERLIST

________________________________________________________________________________

It had been exactly six days, four hours, and forty-two minutes since you had spoken to Peter or Ned. You didn’t really know how to act like a normal human being without their obnoxious tactics ringing in your ears of every second of every day. Especially since your small crush on Peter was slightly creeping up on you as the days passed on. They were your best friends, always had been. But, this time, it wasn’t a delicate topic, apparently.

You had walked up to them at lunch almost a week ago, clutching your lunch tray with both hands, a smile plastered on your face  as you were excited as all to tell them your news about the algebra test getting pushed back to Thursday. All three of you stayed up so late the night before studying for that test, and by the end of the night, none of you had any idea what was going on, which was odd. You usually nailed math within three seconds. But not this time. So, your excitement was very evident on your face.

You approached them, Peter’s back slightly turned around as Ned followed the position, their eyes fixate don something clearly much more important than lunch. Your eyebrows furrowed on confusion as you set down your backpack next to you and your lunch tray in front of you, taking a seat at the gray lunch. Your stare becomes more intent, neither of the boys turning around to notice presence.

“Uh, hello?” you questioned, knocking your knuckles against the hard surface. All of the sudden, their ears perk at the the sudden noise, both heads turning around completely.

Eyebrows raised, you make direct eye contact with Peter, his brown orbs widening at the sight of your presence, “Oh! H-Hey, Y/N.”

Ned’s hair falls in front of his eyes, a guilty yet seemingly confused smile rolls over his lips, shoulders slouching a little, “Heyyyy,” he said, rolling out the ‘y’.

Your arms fold across your chest, suspiciously giving them a stare down, eyes narrowing as they slide from Peter to Ned, and back to Peter, “What are doing back there?” Your tone serious yet skeptical.

Peter shot you a weak smile, “Nothing!” he blurted out suddenly, eyes still widen at your suspicious glare. “We were just checking our work from Mrs. Smith’s lab yesterday.”

“Uh, no,” you interjected, shaking your head, looking at them as if they thought you were stupid, “We turned in our labs yesterday. They’re already graded, Peter.”

His mouth popped open and closed numerous times, looking like a gaping fish out of water, knowing he’d been caught so easily. You scooted up further on the sat, placing your folded arms on the table, “What were you really doing, Peter?” you questioned, your tension rising for the last time.

Ned shot up, belting out before Peter could say anything, “It’s nothing! We can’t tell you, Y/N. Like we really, can’t tell you.”

Peter looked from you to Ned multiple times before shaking his head up and down, signalling his agreement with Ned, “We just can’t.”

What was he hiding?

You felt your tension rise, ruining your previous thoughts, “I would never keep a secret from you two, ever,” you let out sternly, cracking your knuckles.

Lies. You’re such a liar.

Peter and Ned both looked at each other quickly before shooting you a guilty look for what felt like the thousandth time in a matter of five minutes. Your Y/E/C eyes pierced through Ned’s quickly, then shooting toward Peter’s gaze. Y/E/C pierced into his sparkling brown gaze and you felt disconnected with your best friend for the first time in your life. You share everything with each other, why not this.

You felt excluded and betrayed. Picking up your backpack, you roll your eyes in their direction once more before muttering, “Whatever. Guess we’re not as close as I had thought,” the words dripped like venom off your lips, anger bubbling deep inside you. You whisk away quickly, not looking back at what you had thought, your best friends faces.

The next few days, you felt the build up of tension between you and Peter. Every time he would see you in the hallway, he would give you a stern look before slamming his locker shut, ignoring your distant presence, and go to class. You began to realize your slight crush on him was fading, fast. You couldn’t believe how your two friends could keep anything from you, and Peter couldn’t believe you would be mad at him for something as little as an untold secret. He knew you would never keep anything from him, but this was just too big of a matter.

Or so he thought.

“Call Mr. Stark, Jane” you told your suit, yanking your mask off, revealing your sweaty face in the mirror gazing back at you.

“Calling Tony Stark..” Jane, as you liked to call her, initiated the call to Mr. Stark. You slumped down onto your bed, lying back on your pillow in complete exhaustion from this weeks past events.

“Miss Y/N, what can I do for you today?” Tony’s voice now evident in your ear.

You sat up immediately, wrapping your arm around your bedpost, “Yes, Mr. Stark, I was wondering if you had anything for me to possibly do? I’m very… bored,“ you said hesitantly but confidently, yearning for Tony to give you something to do to take your mind off everything going on around in your ‘normal’ life.

Tony’s breath was steady in the earpiece for a few moments before sighing heavily, "Okay, Miss Y/L/N, I have something, well someone I want you to meet. I’ve been wanting to do this for a while, but haven’t gotten around to it. Another… project.”

Your eyes lit up and your heart quickened at the thought of another superhero, “Yes, Mr. Stark! I would love to! Anything I need to know about this other… project?” you questioned, arms bending down to take off your blue and yellow suit, preparing for the mission.

“Yes, actually. They’re around your age, kind of annoying. Rather… talkative,” he said with slight annoyance in his voice.

You chuckled lightly, “Bye, Mr. Stark see you soon!” you yelled a little too excitedly before ending the call as you quickly shoved your suit into your bag. As soon as your foot hit the door mat, your mind instantly began to wonder into thoughts of this other super-human.

What were they like? Were their powers similar to yours? Not many people can teleport and or telepathically communicate with one another. Were they a guy? Oh god, what if he’s hot? Well, may be nice to have some eye candy your age on missions. What if I know them? Oh, c'mon, that’s almost impossible.Th chances of that happening are like a billion to one.

When you arrived at Stark Tower, Tony leading you to your so called 'mission’, your excitement ran up and down your veins. Your stomach did somersaults ever second as your feet kept a steady pace behind Tony.

Interrupting your thoughts, Tony, turned around to speak to you, still walking, “So, Miss Y/L/N, I have had this in mind for quite some time now. I just thought with being the only two teenagers on the team, if you met someone similar to you, you’d feel more comfortable,” he continued, typing in a pass-code on a tablet as you approached a huge gray door.

“But, you know of Spider-Man, right?” he questioned, eyebrows raised at your nervous gaze. Your eyes widened as the name rolled off his tongue.

“O-Of course, I mean he’s a new legend here,” you attempted to let out calmly as Tony still looked at you. “I had no idea he was so young.”

“Oh yes, he’s your age. That’s who I wanted you to meet today, but not 'Spider-Man’. The character behind the mask.”

Your stomach’s somersaults picked up. Oh my god, Spider-Man is a legend. You were a new trainee, so you looked in awe at this young yet legendary person behind the red mask.

Tony opened one last door, turning to you and stopping once you were inside, “Okay, I’ll send him out here. You stay here,” he smiled slightly at you as your head nodded vigorously in his direction. He walked behind yet another large door to retrieve your new colleague.

Okay, act cool. He’s just someone who’s just like you. Tony may even send you on missions with these boy, so you got this. When he walks in, just stick your hand out politely and say to him, “Hello, I’m-”

“Y/N?”

Your ears instantly heard the familiar sounding voice echo into your ears like something so delicate it would hurt if you didn’t understand what was standing right in front of you. The scratchiness of the tone hit you like a bus, interrupting your thoughts. Slowly yet threateningly, you turned around, glistening brown was what hit you first as your best friend Peter Parker stood in front of you, holding the unrecognizable blue and red suit by his side.

“Oh my god. You’re a superhero?,” you let out, eyes widening at the boy standing in front of you.

Peter blinked rapidly, his mouth barely able to let out any words at your figure holding the blue and yellow suit, “I-I don’t even know what to say.”

You nodded your head in agreement, slowly walking towards him. Your heart rate sped up and your face turned a bright red, due to the fact Peter knew your secret and you know knew his. Your eyes captivated his in a gaze for what felt like years, your breaths now mingling at your close proximity.

You were surprised by your next set of actions. Lifting a hand towards his face, you set it on his face softly, your hands laying on top of his muscular jaw bone, your voice in awe, “I just can’t believe it’s you.”

He smiled softly at your actions, his eyes scanning your face, looking for some kind of explanation. You then realized you now knew what kept you two from talking for a week. Your lips curled into a sly smile, “So, this must have been one big lab Mrs. Smith had to grade.”

His expression switched to a joyful one, reaching forward to wrap his arms around you. You followed him, your arms enveloping him in a bone crushing hug as he muttered in your ear, “You have no idea.”

Adoption for Fun and Profit

I was DMing a 5e session where the premise was helping a young, mute elf child (Sunny) get back to their parents, with the promise of pay should they get back home alive (since the characters are all neutral alignments and otherwise probably wouldn’t do it). It becomes apparent that this kid has been living alone for months and probably won’t last much longer without a proper house and family. At the end of the session they find a small house with gravestones nearby and find out that the parents had died years before, and Sunny just couldn’t survive the trip back to the house alone and wanted help to get there. Sunny offers them their pay solemnly, clearly not expecting them to stay any longer than they need to. Without much hesitation one player who just adored this sweet child decided to adopt the kid as their own (completing a good part of their character arc).

DM: So… you’re taking in this kid, then? Yeah? Well! Alright, congrats, you’re a family now! That’s-that’s so adorable, guys. Gotta, gotta go back to school shopping, start the college fund.

[Some time passes as players talk about the choice.]

Rogue: I hand Sunny back the box of gold with a paper taped to it, it says “Sunny’s School Fund”. I say, “Listen, this here is—this is gonna be your college fund now.”
DM: Oh my god that’s so cute. You guys, you are ALL neutral alignments, this is so nice of you. That… that kid has 300 gold pieces in their college fund now I guess, wow.
Rogue: I—I took 50 gold out of the box, actually.
Table: *a beat of silence before uproarious laughter*
DM: I mean—I mean okay you’re chaotic neutral so this fits really well like—you would’ve earned 75 splitting it equally anyways, you, you’re giving back to—that’s completely fair.

You know how I know I’m a lesbian?
  • Cute Guy: *is really nice, smells okay, is clean, responsible, compassionate, funny. Helps the underpriviledge in third world countries. Can cure cancer. Volunteers in a retirement home*
  • Me: what a nice guy. Yeah maybe I'm okay with kissing him? idk
  • Girl: *blinks*
  • Me: oh my god. What is happening. How is this goddess walking amongst the rest of us mortals. How is it possible to be so soft and nice and I feel so lucky to exist at the same time as you, I want to have your children.
Misdialed Call (Part One)

Summary: After an overall bad day, you call your best friend to rant and to vent. But when you accidentally misdial, you end up talking to a complete stranger. What you don’t know is that this stranger may not be a stranger at all. He may even be the world’s first superhero. (Drabble Series)

Author’s Note: Hey guys. I’m back from my hiatus. I’ve miss you guys so much. I hope to continue writing for a while now that midterms are over and done with. I hope you guys enjoy this series and thank you for everything!
Also, special thanks to Combat Anon for the idea of this series!

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: 934

Originally posted by ohevansmycaptain

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Who is Montparnasse? I guess give a quick bio? I've only seen the 2012 movie so I don't know much about him

OH MY GOODNESS OKAY!

In the Brick, Montparnasse is a member of Patron-Minette, a criminal gang which operates in Paris. He was a street urchin not unlike Gavroche, before a girl told him he was really handsome and since that day, Montparnasse resorted to crime in order to get himself pretty clothes (I swear I’m not making this up). Since he’s piss-poor and lazy as fuck, crime seemed like the best gig in order to get what he wants.

Okay, so random Montparnasse traits:

  • He’s vain. As fuck.
  • Lazy
  • Loyal
  • Fucking ExtraTM . Like, the guys goes everywhere with a red rose because?? He thinks he’s cool??
  • He’s a fucking dork oh my god he thinks he’s so cool but the guy got his ass kicked by a sixty yo dude like son, check yoself because u rek yourself
  • Edgelord
  • He likes Gavroche a lot.
  • He’s around 18/20 in the Brick
  • His character is written as very ambiguous. Very grey, if you will. Definitely not GOOD but definitely not a villain either. Hence the quote: “ He was kind, effeminate, graceful, robust, sluggish, ferocious” See the antithesis? (The original French text describes Montparnasse as “gentil” aka “kind” or “nice” while the English text translated it as “genteel” which doesn’t convey the same connotations and I’m HELLA SALTY ABOUT IT.)
  • Part of me is convinced that Montparnasse was written as a comic relief

Random Montparnasse facts:

  • Babet, one of his fellow associates, calls him “pretty boy” once
  • Has a swordcane
  • Gets robbed by Gavroche once
  • Has a sort of brotherly relationship with Gavroche, with Gav’ teasing him to no end
  • Refuses to speak argot (slang) because he wants to appear PROPER and DIGNIFIED (see the Edgelord entry)
  • Robber and assassin by night, dandy by day
  • Javert calls him a “Devilish Dandy” :’)

Anyway, I love my trash son

a giggly finn

Home | Domestic Life

Summary: You finally get home with Tom after a long press tour junket.

Characters: Tom Holland x Reader

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1,153

A/N: Y’all wanted domestic life with Tom, so here it is!! This will be an on-going series, with no real plot. I just want to keep the theme of the imagines grouped. I hope you guys enjoy this and welcome to the Domestic Life series :)


It had been an exhausting few weeks for Tom after his long press junket tour for Spider-Man: Homecoming. You were there for a week and felt tired, so you could imagine how he was feeling. He had invited you to join him for the last week because he missed you too much. You were guessing Harrison and Harry weren’t enough to keep him company. However, today was the day you headed back to London with Tom and you were so excited.

“We will now be arriving in Heathrow. Welcome to London,” the pilot announced.

“We’re home,” he said and kissed you softly.

Keep reading

707mmgirl  asked:

I was wondering if you could do a NSfw where the rfa+v and saeran are having sex with mc for thw first time and they orgasm too fast and are afraid that they'd disappoint MC?

(  ˵¯͒⌄¯͒˵;;) I couldn’t sleep so I really…Really…Wanted to write this. Thought about it all day.


Yoosung

- He was losing it mentally. His hands were sweaty, his chest was beating

- He wasn’t going to lie, he had jerked off quite a bit before…Especially when LOLOL introduced that new female skin….

- But never much more than that! God, he was too scared to even get a sex toy- Too scared and embarrassed to even entertain the thought!

- He tried asking Zen for tips, even resorted to asking Seven. But Seven laughed and Zen said to look up some porn videos to get an idea because he was too busy to help

- (Or was he just sour MC didn’t fall for him?)

- When you came out of the bathroom in your pjs, he was already trying not to get a stiffy. I mean, what you were wearing wasn’t horrible, wasn’t perverted, but…You weren’t wearing a bra. Even he could tell that

- And the fact that tonight would be the first time you shared a bed together…

- “Yoosung?”

- “Y-Yes??”

_ “…Are you going to come lay down? It’s cold without you~”

- This was it, he was going to die. Someone get his will from that coffee fiasco out, he was going to need it after tonight.

- Carefully, he climbed into bed behind you, opting to try and be the big spoon and hold you tight.

-…Too tight, too tight! Your ass was rubbing against his groin so nicely. He ended up burying his face in your hair, desperate just to pretend he didn’t feel it.

- “Yoosung, are you alright?”

- “Yeah, yeah- I, uhm. I am.”

- “So you’re not hard-”

- “Don’t say it!!”

- Oh my god, this is it. You were going to make fun of him endlessly, just like the guys would when they found out. 

- You turned around to face his red face, and right when he thought it wasn’t going to get again worse, you slipped your hands around and squeezed his ass, pulling his hips flush against yours

- He. Couldn’t. Breathe.

- He felt you start kissing his neck, grinding against him, and he could only whimper in response. This isn’t how he thought it was going to happen- I mean, he was supposed to take the lead, right?? Right??

- But you slipped your hand in his sweat pants, letting out a lustful groan as you found he wasn’t wearing underwear, and he lost it

- You pulled your hand back and looked at the cum on your fingers, before looking him right in the eye and licking your hand clean

- Were you trying to kill him???

- “MC I’m sosososorry, oh my god-”

- “That’s okay, Yoosung,” You grabbed his hand, guiding it under your underwear, “Why don’t you show me what those gaming fingers can do?”

- God, please someone print out that will. He really was going to need it after tonight.

Jaehee

- So she wasn’t as innocent as everyone thought she was

-…But she was still blushing like crazy

- A cuddling session gushing over a dirty story you found online had turned sexual very quickly. Mainly due to your wandering hand, but…

- Now she was under you, one hand halfway covering her face, and the other gripped your arm as your teased her clit

- Every time she let out a squirming moan, her chest heaved and you swore you were in heaven

- You didn’t waste much time with foreplay. The two of you hadn’t really gone this far before, and this poor woman needed some excitement in her life that didn’t end in cat hair everywhere

- You couldn’t take it anymore, you slowly licked her nipple, then clamped your teeth over it, loving her surprised moan.

- “M-Mc!”

- You gave her nipple a harsh suck, your fingers trailing down from her clit to her entrance, slipping in two fingers already.

- You walls clamped down, her nails digging into your forearm already. She was sweating, chest heaving, but you knew all the right spots to hit.

- As your mouth bit on her neck, her moans kept getting higher and higher in pitch, until her nails dug in so harshly that you knew you were going to need a few bandages later.

- You felt her hips jerk up a few times, her whimpering when you kept trying to fuck her with your fingers, so you slowly pulled out.

- “Did you cum already?”

- She let out a groan, covering her face. “Yes, I’m sorry. It’s been a while.”

- You just laughed, kissing her forehead. 

- “I mean… I could be my turn, if you really loved meee~”

- She rolled her eyes but laughed, motioning for you to switch spots with her.

Seven

- The two of you were resting on the couch, just cuddling, until his fingers liiightly brushed against your sides, and you made the mistake of giggling

- Now it was On

- First thing about being friends with Seven: Never, ever, let him find out where you’re ticklish.

- He had you squealing and threatening him at the same time, squirming in between his legs as he laughed at you.

- Pretty soon you started fighting back- Turning around and desperate to find his ticklish spots. 

- But, after a while of squirming in eachother’s arms, he accidentally let out a moan that was not painful

- You stopped, and the both of you blushed… But, you just placed a questioning kiss on his lips.

- “R-really? Right here?”

- You nodded, already moving to start palming him through his pants, and he automatically started working on pulling off your shirt

- He groaned as you unzipped his pants, palming him through his boxers. He tried returning the favor, squeezing your breasts through your bra.

- But you slipped to the floor and got on your knees? What where you- Oh my god you were going to blow him

-Oh…My god.

- He watched with a growing blush as you tugged on his pants to be able to pull his hardening cock out easier. He watched your eyes widen just a bit when you pulled it out, him mentally fist pumping that he was a good enough size for you

- He wanted to lean back- Play it cool and just enjoy it, but he couldn’t take his eyes off of you. You brushing your hair behind your ear, getting a decent grip on his cock, your half-lidded eyes studying the head. He could feel the pre-cum leaking out already, and he prayed you thought that was normal.

- You gave his cock a few tentative pumps, him trying his fucking best not to jerk his hips up, and then suddenly you took the tip in your mouth.

- He couldn’t hold it back, he ended up letting a low whimper out, his fingers itching to tangle themselves in your hair, but god he managed to keep them away.

- You bobbed your head a bit, removing the cock from your mouth with an obscene ‘pop’, looking him right in the eyes as you licked up the underside of his cock

- …And he came all over your face

- It was slightly, just a bit, adorable at how you winced, but he felt his soul leave his damn body. Damnit, he knew he should have jerked off last night when he had the chance.

- “Oh my god, Mc I’m so–” 

- You wiped a bit off your cheek, slipping your finger in your mouth and letting out a hum. “You taste a bit bitter…”

- Instantly he pulled you up on the couch, sucking and nipping at your neck as you moaned a bit.

- He really, really, needed to know how you tasted as well. And, well….Hopefully that would make up for him being such a quick shot.

Jumin

- The marriage had been sweet, and ended with lots of cuddling on a plane as the two of you went to enjoy your honeymoon, something Jumin was very insistent on.

- As soon as the two of you landed, it was getting changed into something more appropriate, going off and enjoying the sites, having a nice romantic dinner

- And now the two of you finally made it to the place you were staying at for the next week. With just one bed in the room.

- He didn’t want to admit he felt nervous- What if he harmed you? What if he did so many things you didn’t enjoy? Expert Playboy only told him so much, and he wasn’t too keen on watching porn. Especially if Seven had his hands in the RFA’s search history.

- The two of you dressed in your sleepwear, then he coaxed you over to lay with him.

- Getting to finally hold you in his arms like this was amazing. He felt his chest swell every time you snuggled closer to him.

- “Mc?”

- “Yes, honey?”

- He gave your forehead a kiss at the nickname, his cheeks lightly blushing. “From my research, we’re not completely done for the day yet, are we?”

- Your face went red, but he started with gentle kisses to your lips, moving to your jaw, then to your neck, his fingers dancing around the hem of your shirt.

- Your breath hitched a couple of times, but you started working on unbuttoning his shirt, groaning when his hands started groping your breasts

- God, this felt amazing so far, from just barely doing the minimum. He focused on recalling all the tips in the magazine, some of the grosser things some board members had talked about drunk- Just anything he could apply to please you

- It wasn’t long before you were fully on your back, breasts heaving as he teased your clit, his boxers the only clothing left on him

- The way your cheeks flushed looking at his cock straining against his boxers made him want to take you instantly, but he needed to be patient, he needed to hold out a bit longer.

- But you gently squeezed his forearm, mewling a bit as he kept trying to rub your clit

- “Ju-Jumin, please, I want to feel your cock- I’m ready, just please.”

- He felt his eyes widen, but quickly cleared his throat and nodded, pulling his boxers off

- He teased you a bit more, the head of his cock barely entering you and pulling back out, making you let out the cutest whines. But finally, when he couldn’t even stand it anymore, he pushed himself fully inside of you, groaning along with you

- He stayed still for a moment, feeling how amazing it was to have you squeezing him so tightly. He tried to move, just one pump, but it was too much.

- As soon as he realized what had happened, his face was completely red, and he felt so ashamed when you let out a little questioning noise.

- “It…It seems that I’ve…” He trailed off, suddenly pissed at himself for cumming so damn early. You didn’t even get to enjoy anything.

- But you just squeezed his hand, placing a kiss on his cheek.

- “If you want…You could just use your fingers for tonight, tomorrow we could try-”

- “No, we’re doing this right tonight. I told you I would keep you up all nigh- I’m not going back on that now.”

- While he did finally get rid of his shame at how much you squirmed from his fingers alone, he promised himself that he was going to make you cum twice as much from his cock alone.

- (What the fuck did those magazines say about this situation???)

Zen

- You had been trying for ages to get him to have sex with you. 

- Inviting him in the shower? ‘Accidentally’ letting him walk in on you? Snuggling super close during a romance scene? All of them failed.

- And god, did he hate it.

- He wanted to fuck you, have you screaming his name so loud he was sure to get noise complaints- But was he ready??

- It had been a very, very, long time since he had, ahem, let the beast out. The last time was…Way too long ago.

- But all the teasing, and bluntness without saying anything, was starting to get to him. Starting to have his hand wandering when you weren’t there with him, and a few times when you were.

- Tonight was a bit better. You weren’t trying to throw more ‘hints’ his way, you were just snuggled up to him resting your head on his chest, tracing an imaginary circle on his ribs

- Yeah, he could handle this!

- But your fingers stopped, and you started to play with his hair a bit instead, making cute little noises as you shifted to look up at him

- “Your princess wants some kisses.”

- Oh no. He felt his cock twitch, but he tried his best to ignore it as he tipped your chin up, planting a soft kiss on your lips.

- “I can’t help but do as my princess wants~”

- But you pulled him back towards you, planting a few soft kisses, and then slowly making them more and more greedy.  You even slipped your tongue in, and when he groaned out he knew he was done for.

- He wanted to avoid sex at the moment, but tonight he didn’t have enough willpower.

- He grabbed your shoulders, pushing you to lay on your back as he slipped between your legs, leaning over to start sucking on your neck.

- You didn’t waste a second, especially since you had been trying to get to this point for ages. You wrapped your legs around his waist, grinning when he grinded against you with a low growl

- “You’ve been such a tease, princess, I can’t take it anymore.”

- As he pushed your shirt up, working on your breasts, he was frantically trying to recall all the moves he used to do back when he was in that gang.

- (God, it really had been forever!)

- Your hands fumbled with his shorts, yanking them down and giving his ass a firm squeeze, loving as he bit your neck in response.

- You were going to kill him. He wanted the first time to be sweet, romantic, but he couldn’t even control his thoughts right now. He just kept imagining how tight you would feel, how you would squeeze down on him-

- You reached and grasped his cock, starting a teasing pace as he leaked pre-cum already.

- Ah, fuck, fuck, he couldn’t take this. He ended up moaning into your shoulder as he jerked his hips in time with your pumps. One, two times, and he came.

- Kill. Him.

- He didn’t want to face you, he just closed his eyes tight as you pulled your hand away.

- “Zenny~ No fair, let me have fun too.”

- He took a deep breath and looked at you nervously- Only to be greeted with a firm kiss. You pushed his shoulder a bit, wriggling your hips.

- “Why don’t you put that mouth to better use~?”

- He looked a bit dumbfounded for a moment, but quickly slid back a bit, working on getting your pjs off.

- I mean… at least he had an impressive recovering speed? Hopefully luck would be on his side and let him recover fast enough to fuck you like he had been wanting.

V

- It…Had been a very long time. A long time since he was fully willing to have sex, at least.

- When the innocent cuddling on his bed got more perverse- Your hand slipping under his shirt and teasingly running your fingers so close to the waistband of his pants- Well… He did want it, it had just been ages

- He tried his best not to show it. Each feather-light touch he returned, every little breath you let out he had to stop himself from groaning

- He hadn’t realised how badly he wanted this from you

- Once the cute kisses died down, turning into panting breaths and low moans, you rolled yourself on top of him, straddling him and purposefully refusing to grind against him

- Were you trying to kill him? He needed this- He needed you

- His hands found your hips, holding you as he bucked his hips up with a barely contained groan. It had been too long, way too long, since he had felt so good from just teasing

- “Mc-”

- You leaned over, starting another string of greedy kisses, taking his will to talk and interrupt you away

- It didn’t take long for his hands to act on their own- Slipping under your shirt to grope, pushing your ass down so he could grind against you fully

- When you broke the kiss and let out such a sinful moan, he couldn’t do it anymore.

- “Mc, please- Now, now, please.”

- He felt your breath against his neck as you giggled, wiggling out of your underwear and pulling down his pants

- You took his cock and slid the head against your clit, making him bite down hard on his lip

- “Oh, god, Mc-” You were horrible but so fucking amazing. He wanted to thrust his hips up, slam into you with all he had-

- You let out a little mewl of pleasure as the head of his cock rubbed your clit just right, and suddenly you felt a hot spurt against you.

- He covered his face quickly, panting but letting out a sound of utter disappointment. 

- “It’s been ages, I just-”

- “Shh,” You leaned over, kissing his forehead. “ It’s fine.”

- But it wasn’t, was it? Your cheeks were still flushed, you were soaked but he knew you hadn’t came yet.

-… Was it too early to suggest…?

- “M-Mc, ride me.”

- “…What?”

- God, don’t make him say it again. He carefully squeezed his cock, feeling how sensitive it was, but he didn’t care. He wanted you anyway.

- He rubbed the head of his dick against your clit, then finally trailed it to your entrance, pushing the tip in and joining you in your moan

- “Jihyun-”

- He jerked his hips up, pushing into you fully, and the sound you made had him dig his nails into your thighs.

- “Ride. Me. I can take it.”

- He came early, but he was going to be damned if you weren’t going to be able to feel his cock slam in you tonight.

Saeran

- He had experience with women. Not exactly loving ones, but quick and hard fucks in the backs of bars or in hotels was what he was used to the most.

- And usually they all went well, except if the women tried being too clingy with him.

- He wasn’t expecting you to last so fucking long though

- The two of you were just cuddling on his bed, something he was always insistent on. But you were trying to find some funny things to show him on your phone, and he was tired of watching videos. 

- He ended up initiating it, slowly trying to tease you by acting like he wasn’t aware of where his hands were, but quickly dropping the act and pushing you on your back, grinding against you and slipping his tongue in between your bruising lips

 - It didn’t take long at all for both of you to rid each other of any fabric in the way, him burying his cock inside of you with a grunt and a low “Fuck,”

- Usually with the women he had fucked before, they came rather quickly… 

- But as he harshly slammed himself inside of you, finally being able to enjoy being inside of you, he felt himself coming closer and closer to the edge- And you definitely hadn’t came yet.

- He pulled your leg up a bit, pushing it flush against your chest to get a better angle to ram into you, letting out a growling string of curses as you tightened around him

- A few more jerks of his hips, and he easily came inside of you, groaning out and breathing harshly against your neck.

- He wasn’t expecting you to whine, though. He looked up, a bit confused, as you pouted.

- “You came already?”

- “…You didn’t??” He swore he had felt you tense up, dig your nails into him even more. What happened?? Oh god, was he losing his touch?

- You pushed him on his back, climbing on top of him and forcing his cock back into you, rolling your hips. “I wasn’t done yet~ Can you keep going?”

- The fuck he could, but his embarrassment didn’t let him say that. He gripped your hips, keeping you in place as he pushed as deep as he could inside of you, letting out a guttural groan.

- You let out a loud moan, starting a steady and heavy pace, drinking in how his cock hit your g-spot on every thrust.

- He hadn’t been overstimulated before, but he refused to argue against it. He apparently needed to build his stamina back up anyway…

  • Bitty: to make sure we don't rush into anything we will have to keep this relationship quiet. keep it on the down low
  • also bitty: Oh my god have you guys seen Jack? he is so good!!! why i'm going away for the weekend? ....hum a cousin? yeah i have a cousin whatever, LOOK AT THIS FUNNY VIDEO OF JA--tater!! i am so proud of my boy(s) y'all have grown so much jack is doing so well!!! i am so proud of him!!... yes Holster i am proud of you too - that's what i said i am proud of my boys! i'm gonna bake 30 maple sugar apple pies!!!! yes i did have a nice time this weekend. i just have a thing for dark haired men in suits and blue eyes and tall and cheek bones and i think my future boyfriend have to like sports but preferable hockey... I am an ass kind of man, i think. oh hey jack!!!

mikailamika  asked:

Hi! could you do friends to lovers for jaehyun too? I really like your aus <333 thank youuu :D

a lot of people asked for him ^^ (im also working on his college au~)
find others: ten | sicheng | mark

  • you actually don’t know jaehyun at first,,,,,but he knows you
  • because you work part-time at this restaurant that he and mark always go to and for some reason,,,,even though they’ve been there like 1354484 times you,,,,,never remember his name
  • you remember mark tho,,,,really well????? and every time he comes in you’re like “canada!! whats up?” and jaehyun is like ???? canada??? they have a nickname for you
  • and mark is like yeah, i have a nickname for them too they’re really cool
  • and jaehyun is like ?!??! because,,,,,,,he wants a nickname too what,,,,i mean no he just wonders how mark got to know you so well
  • and mark explains that its just because he comes here with other members too so you see him more and he’s like “jaehyun,,,i can introduce you if you want?”
  • and jaehyun is like,,,,,,,s-sure,,,,not that i wanT To bE TheIR FrIEND or anything,,,
  • and mark is just like mhmm anyway the next time we go ill do it~
  • mark keeps his promise,,,, the next time they stop by the place for some food you’re like grinning when you see mark,,,high fiving him and giving jaehyun a polite nod
  • and marks like “btw this is jaehyun,,,he comes here a lot but you always mix him up with doyoung and taeyong and taeil so remember him ok??” 
  • and you’re like laughing into your hand and you’re like im sorry jaehyun,,,,i have terrible memory i only remember people by their nicknames
  • and jaehyun quietly mumbles that it’s ok,, and mark is just like “hey! you can call him jeffery. that was his name when he was in america” and you’re like cool!!! jeffery and canada then
  • and jaehyun is like !!! they gave me a nickname
  • mark: actually i-
  • jaehyun: sh
  • but,,,from that day on you keep saying jaehyun’s nickname and he even works up the courage to come without mark and you’re like !!!!! hey jeffrey 
  • and he’s like,,,,,,,oh my god they remember me now
  • you guys get closer too because sometimes he’ll come in and you’ll take a little break to sit and talk and jaehyun tells you embarrassing stories about mark that you later tease him for just a bit,,, or you guys talk about the fact that you both like movies and sports and whatnot
  • jaehyun always asks if you’ll give him the recipe to the restaurants spicy pork and you’re like the owner would kill me so,,,,,no
  • and its nice,,,,,because jaehyun finally feels like he’s your friend the way mark was and mark assumes jaehyun wants to be more than just ur friend
  • but jaehyun is like !!! what???? haha no ive never had a crush in my life
  • and mark is like ok,,,,dude,,,,sure
  • until one day jaehyun comes to eat with mark and you don’t greet them with the usual smile and joke,,,to be honest the look on your face is pure exhaustion and before mark can ask jaehyun takes a hold of your wrist as you set down the water for them and asks,,,concern laced in his voice,,,,about whats going on
  • and you look at him,,, try to muster a smile and say that it’s nothing. work and school have just got too much too handle and you’re only running on 2 hours of sleep
  • when you disappear into the kitchen mark looks at jaehyun and is like “,,,,,hey are you listening?” but jaehyun’s eyes are glued to the kitchen door,,,,,,,waiting for you
  • and mark just chuckles to himself and when you come back out he tells you that he can’t order - he needs to get back home really quickly but that jaehyun will stay
  • confused, both you and jaehyun look at him but mark winks at jaehyun before slinging his bag over his shoulder and waving goodbye
  • and you rub your eyes,,,still tired before asking what jaehyun wants and he orders the usual but he’s also like “do you think you can sit down for a bit,,,you look like you might pass out”
  • and you’re like im fine jeffery,,,it’s all good and you even try to laugh but jaehyun can hear the strain in your voice
  • and when you get his order,,, he notices you almost trip and instinctively gets out of his seat and when you’re about to set down the plate,,,you wobble a bit and it almost slips off the tray but jaehyun catches it
  • and you apologize and jaehyun,,,,cant take it 
  • he calls out to the owner that you’re going to go with him outside
  • the owner makes a face but jaehyun says its urgent - he’ll come back and pay for the food and everything so the owner waves their hands and says that it needs to be quick
  • with jaehyuns arm around your waist he helps you outside and tells you to sit down outside the restaurant while he runs to the grocery nearby to get you some drinks and snacks and you whisper that he shouldn’t have done that,,,
  • tell your boss you needed a break you were fine and for the first time you see jaehyun frown,,,like really frown and he opens the drink for you and is like “here. eat this too, and stop talking nonsense. no one is fine on 2 hours of sleep.”
  • you try to protest but jaehyun is like “drink. eat. dont argue.” and you do it,,,,sighing and getting up because you need to get back to work
  • but jaehyun stops you and he’s like “if you need help, you can lean on me. really.”
  • and you’re like “jef- jaehyun?”
  • and he shyly looks away but after chewing his lip he looks back at you,,,,,and your heart does a little spin because ??? was he always this handsome/??
  • and he goes “mark was right, you know i never just wanted to be a friend to you. i want to be,,,,,,something more,,,,,,,so if that’s ok -”
  • swallowing he pulls you into his arms and against your hair whispers “if that’s ok,,,let me take care of you ok?”
  • the moment is,,,,heart touching and you feel your face flush red,,,but being in his arms is so comfortable
  • it feels,,,,right
  • and you hear your boss open the door and yell for you to come back but jaehyun is like “owner!!! id like to order 7 more sets of the lunch special!!”
  • that gets the owner smiling and they’re like ooo coming right up,,,,7???? that’s like more than a hundred dollars-
  • and you pull away and you’re like ??? jaehyun 7 sets??? can you eat that much
  • and he’s like “i can eat a lot more than you expect, also ill share with the other guys, but um -”
  • he looks around and then suddenly pecks your lips and he’s like 
  • “sorry,,,i wanted to do that before your boss makes you go back in”
  • giggling,,,you touch your lips and you’re like it’s ok ,,,,,,,,, jaehyun
  • and he’s like no more jeffery? and you’re im not gonna call my boyfriend a nickname,,,ill call him jaehyun or,,,,,,do you like my baby more??
  • jaehyun blushing: i,,,um,,,oh,,,, 

Context: our group has a half-elf ranger and a Tiefling Barbarian/ranger/fighter that throughout our campaign had a little something going on. At one point the Tiefling left to help his sister without telling anyone. Cue emo half-elf. The following happens a month or so after the Tiefling went AWOL. Keep in mind our half-elf, while adorable, has really sucky rolls.

DM: as you guys are standing in front of the door, you hear a loud crack above you. [Half-elf] roll acrobatics.

Half-elf: crap. *Decent roll*

DM: okay, so you hear this loud crack and something falling you dodge out of the way and a body lands where you were standing–

Half-elf: I STOMP ITS FACE IN! *nat20*

DM:…you stomp on their face and completely shatter [Tiefling’s] mask.

Half-elf: *freaking out* oh my god!!

Tiefling: …nice..to see you too…

Half-elf: i am so sorry!!

Party comedian: no she’s not.

Warlock: yeah… Don’t piss off [half-elf]…

Half-elf: Hey! He was crawling on the ceiling, what the hell!? But I’m so sorry…

hold my beer

Ok so this is yet another idea that I will NEVER have time to write (for those that follow my Cross the River one shots, I’m still sorry for inflicting the half finished fics on you haha. But I’m not sorry for inflicting this idea on you

Three words:

Drunk. Ladynoir. Wedding. wait is ladynoir even technically a word?

  • It’s quite a few years into the future and Adrien and Marinette are happily revealed and happily married. Everything’s just friggin peachy
  • One day there is an akuma, a girl who got dumped by a dickhead bf for another girl and then goes on a rampage to show everyone she is ‘good enough.’ After they defeat her, they try to cheer her up
  • Chat, being Chat, thinks that being a flirt will help boost her self-esteem, bc, you know, getting flirted at by a superhero is an ego boost no matter how sad you are
  • Lo and behold, it backfires
  • The girl (lets call her Ada) gets pissed off that Chat is flirting with her right in front of Lady, because “Aren’t you guys like, together??”
  • Chat backpedals, Lady facepalms. No it’s still not official or public that they’re together (keep work separate from home, yknow what I’m sayin, and besides, it’s unwise to let Hawky know the full extent of how much they care for each other because they don’t want to be emotionally manipulated in battle)
  • The girl is like “shit I thought you guys were like.. the perfect relationship. Obviously not. If even you aren’t together, then where’s the hope for me…. sighh….” :’(
  • Ada is so upset that they decide to let her in on a little secret. That in their civilian lives… they are married
  • Ada is all,  :’D omg seriously
  • (^..^) and >(:-:) are like, yeah, but dont tell anyone. It’s a secret. ((SLAPS YOU WITH HEAVY-HANDED FORESHADOWING)) Hey I know what’ll cheer you up, Ada. Lets go out for drinks!
  • AND SO MY FRIENDS, that is how Adrien and Mari end up spending a night on the town with a recent akuma victim as Chat and Lady…

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BTS React to S/O smearing lipstick on them during bj NSFW

@professsionalsinner :  Hey! I’m a new follower and I just read all your reactions and stuff and I’m amazed! You write so so well, damn. Could I please request a BTS reaction to you staining their dicks with red lipstick after giving them a bj? It would be awesome! Thank you so much and keep up the amazing talent you have 😀

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you for the follow, and such nice words! You guys have been so sweet to me today, giving me all of these compliments. 

I love it when I get requests, so whenever something pops into your mind just send me a message/ask and I will get on it as soon as I can!

Requests are OPEN 


Jin: 

Can’t contain his laughter when he sees what giving him a bj did to your face. 

“Oh my god, sweetheart, go look in the mirror!” *dies*

“It’s all over you! You look like a clown. A very sexy clown, of course.”

Originally posted by rapdaegu

Taehyung:

Would admire your work, asking curiously;

“Jagi, next time do you think we could do different colors?”

He would get really excited over the thought, 

“Like a rainbow! I bet it’ll look cool.”

Originally posted by never-miind

Jimin:

“Look how hard you worked baby.”

He would give you a sexy, satisfied smile, while running his fingers through your hair. 

“Had that pretty little mouth all over my dick.”

Originally posted by jiminiediary

Jungkook:

He would find it so erotic, wishing you could have another round after he sees the red smears you left all over him. 

“Ah, baby look at the mess you made.”

“Did you like making me dirty?”

Originally posted by theking-or-thekid

Yoongi:

“I’m not saying I didn’t enjoy it, but did you really have to wear such a bright color?”

“You stained my dick. It literally wont come off. I’ve been scrubbing for five minutes!”

He would be exasperated, but in the end he can’t really complain all that much… because blowjobs. 

Originally posted by jinje-reactions

J Hope:

Is worried at first that you’ll be annoyed at your ruined lipstick (he knows how seriously you take your makeup) but is relieved when you just take one look at the mess you made of his dick and laugh it off. 

He seriously thinks you’re the best. 

“This is straight out of a porno.”

“I’m so happy you’re into weird stuff babe. What did I ever do to deserve you?”

Originally posted by jaayhope

Namjoon: 

Would find it simultaneously arousing and embarrassing. 

“You did a great job, baby.but uh—” He would gesture at your face. “—don’t take this the wrong way, but you kinda look busted.”

“And my dick looks like it went through war or something.” He says, jokingly.

He would go get a wet wash rag to gently clean your face. 

“It is really hot how messy you get for me though.”

Originally posted by myloveseokjin

Wrong number, right person

Steve x Reader
WC
2001
Summary You get a text message from an unknown number and it sets the ball rolling into what could be the start of something wonderful.
Warnings swearing, fluff :D
AN This was written for @howlingbarnes challenge (Happy birthday!). The word I chose was Forelsket (Norwegian/Danish) - The intense, almost unreal feeling that comes with the beginning of love; when you start to fall in love.


Your phone went off, startling you from your painting.

See you at 8!

Furrowing your brow, you panicked. Did you have plans with someone and forgot? You often did that, especially when you were in your zone. Quickly glancing at the contact you noticed that it was an unrecognized number. Breathing a sigh of relief, you texted back Wrong number! Sorry.

A few moments later, you phone went off again Isn’t this Cynthia?

Now you were getting annoyed No.

Your phone rang. Who actually uses a phone to make phone calls? “Hello?”

“May I please speak with Cynthia?” The voice was deep and not unpleasant.

“Sorry buddy, you’ve got the wrong number.”

“I see. And whom am I speaking with?”

Sighing heavily, “My name is Y/N. Who’s this?” Why would you just give this strange man your name?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!

“Y/N. That’s a really pretty name. I’m Steve. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

You couldn’t help but giggle, “Hi Steve.”

“Well isn’t that the prettiest sound.”

You could feel your face heating up with embarrassment and you cleared your throat, “So, um, Steve, this has been lovely but I’ve got to go and you’ve got to figure out how to get in touch with this Cynthia lady.”

He let out a chuckle, a low, deep sound that made you smile in spite of yourself, “You have yourself a lovely evening, Y/N. Talk soon.”

“Wait, what?” but he had already disconnected the line. Talk soon? Why? You shook your head and went back to your painting but your focus had been interrupted and you couldn’t get back into it.

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Educating a Friend
  • Me: So, let's say that you're at school and you see a guy you know. I mean, you guys talk every once in a while and he's pretty cool, but you're not like friends or anything. You just talk to him every once in a while.
  • Guy Friend: What's his name?
  • Me: I don't know. Frank?
  • Guy Friend: No.
  • Me: Okay, fine. His name is Will. Okay?
  • Guy Friend: I don't think it really suits him, but okay.
  • Me: ...So anyway, you're at school during lunchtime and you see Will. So, you notice Will's not eating anything. That's when you realize that Will has no lunch, no money for lunch, and no way of getting either. He's just sitting there like he normally would. He's not acting any differently and he's not asking anyone for anything. Not money, not a fry, not even a salt packet, but you know he's gotta be hungry. So, what do you do?
  • Guy Friend: Do I have any money?
  • Me: Yeah. You have enough for you and another meal.
  • Guy Friend: Duh, I buy him lunch.
  • Me: Okay, cool. So, like you said, you buy him lunch. You buy your lunch and you buy his lunch and you go over and hand it to him. And, he says, "Wow. You know, that's really nice of you, but I wasn't gonna ask anyone for lunch. I was probably just gonna wait until I got home to eat." And, then you say--
  • Guy Friend: Nah, it's cool.
  • Me: Exactly. You say, "Nah, it's cool. I'm just being nice. It's a gift." And, Will says, "You know, that's awesome. You're really nice, bro." And, after that, you guys start hanging out. You guys are like really good buds. You are always hanging out and laughing and just having a good time. So, you guys are friends for a few months, and it's tons of fun. Then, one day, you go up to Will and you say, "Hey, Will, you know, I've been thinking, and I kinda want that five bucks."
  • Guy Friend: What five bucks?
  • Me: Hold on. I'm getting there. So, Will says, "What five bucks?" To which, you reply, "Well, we've been hanging out for a long time and it's been really fun, but like, I've done a lot of really nice things for you. Like, I'm always nice to you and I always listen and do things you wanna do, so I was thinking that because I've been so nice, you should pay me back that five bucks I spent to get your lunch right before we started really hanging out."
  • Guy Friend: What? Why would I--
  • Me: I'm not done yet. So, then Will looks kinda hurt and he says, "But I thought you were just being nice. I thought that was just a gift." So, you say, "Whether or not it was a gift, don't you think you kinda owe me that five bucks since I've been so nice to you?" And, Will says, "No. I don't think I owe you that!" And you get mad, so you say, "Well, I think that you do, so I think you're being really shitty and stuck up about this and I feel like I've been completely wronged."
  • Guy Friend: Oh, my God. That's so fucked up of me. I would never do that to Will. Will was nice. We were buds. That's way screwed.
  • Me: I know, right? Hey, just wondering, have you ever heard of this fictional place called "The Friendzone?"
  • Guy Friend: Well, yeah, but...
  • Guy Friend: ...
  • Guy Friend: ...
  • Guy Friend: oh