oh god do i ship it

Hoseok: Yoongi hyung? I’m boreeed.

Yoongi: Come sit with me i just need to write this and i’m all yours.

Hoseok: You can do this later tho.

Yoongi: No i can’t baby boy it’s really important.


Hoseok *whispering*: But… Hobi has been thinking about daddy all day, i didn’t even touch myself, don’t you think i need a reward? Uh?

Yoongi: Oh my god

victoryhound  asked:

//honestly I just appreciate the fact that Sat is ace, it's rare to find a skele in the fandom that *is*. Representation, lads *waves the ace flag*

Oh my god. Thank you it means a lot. I had major anxieties a couple of times in this fandom because lets be real because. 

Sat doesnt do sex readily like everyone else. 

I DREADED shipping for the first time. Because sat is ace. And it seemed like a prerequisite for sat to be in ANY sort of relationship that sex had to be on the table. And I wasnt comfortable (as ace myself) to go through some of the…rejection I had in real life. Because I told them I didnt do the diddle. Or hid the fact that I didnt. 

anonymous asked:

I'm doing yesterdays inktober "fat" and while I was drawing huxs kid and their outfit, it ended up with them in a mini uniform. Like, a velcro belt, little leather boots (or something) LIKE MINI OFFICERS hUX CAN'T HELP BUT SHOW OFF

oh my god, how cute!!!!! it started off as a little dress up game, but once their son is standing there in his little uniform with his dark hair combed over (he looks so much like Kylo!!!) that Hux can’t help but take him for a little walk around the ship and to the bridge where all the officers swoon at how grown up the little Ren is!!!

anonymous asked:

I ship you with Charlie, you would both geek out about your respective fandoms and then go kick ass

OH MY GOD YES. I need a girl like Charlie yES

WHO DO YOU SHIP ME WITH?
  • me: so..who do you like together? or like which two persons do you really wish were like romantically or platonically involved..?
  • person: you mean who do i ship?
  • me: oh thank god
Stuff My Dad Said During Hamilton (Act 1)
  • Hamilton: Is this that musical that has made you obsessed with dead people?
  • Aaron Burr, Sir: If someone started rhyming my name I would leave. It's so annoying.
  • My Shot: Okay they asked who he was - this - this is not the answer to their question. Oh wait now he's spelling his name - YOU KNOW IN THIS TIME MANY PEOPLE WERE ILLITERATE!
  • The Story Of Tonight: Okay so here's drunk dudes being pals and so not flirting with each other.
  • The Schuyler Sisters: AND PEGGY IS MY NEW MOTTO!
  • Farmer Refuted: You said this was the High School Musical dude right? (Me: Yeah.) STICK TO THE STATUS QUO ALEXANDER!
  • You'll Be Back: Okay George whichever shut up and let America rebel. Rebellion is good - *turns to me* That being said ever start to rebel and you'll be grounded till you die.
  • Right Hand Man: Burr got BURR-NED! Get it? Cause Burr. Burrned. It's funny you're just being stupid.
  • A Winter's Ball: Didn't we already listen to - oh wait no this is different.
  • Helpless: Oh God I hope girls don't act like this. *I give him a confused/dirty look* I mean you should make a boy beg for you not fall at his knees. You should make him helpless.
  • Satisfied: This song is just....*exploding hand moves and noise*....Feelings.
  • The Story of Tonight (Reprise): Another drunk song. And the French dude. (Me: Lafayette) Okay well I'm gonna call him French Fry.
  • Wait For It: Did everyone cheat in this time?
  • Stay Alive: Fucking Charles Lee man. Who's Charles Lee?
  • Ten Duel Commandments: They keep saying "Most Disputes Die And No One Shoots" I feel like they're lying to me...
  • Meet Me Inside: Uh ph, Daddy Washington is mad.
  • That Would Be Enough: How do they know it's a boy? I don't think they had ways to tell in this time.
  • Guns And Ships: Rap off. This dude (Me: Daveed) Yeah him, versus like, Eminem, Jay-Z and...uh other rappers.
  • History Has Its Eyes on You: Okay this went from fun to deep...
  • Yorktown: You know we live an hour from this site...*Looks out window*...We should go and reinact this.
  • What Comes Next: Oh right. Georgey is still there. He can piss off.
  • Dear Theodosia: I feel one of them will die...just how everything is worded. AJ, do I get...feels in this?
  • Lauren's Interlude: Wait what the fuck...is he? Oh my God. Alex's boyfriend!
  • Non-Stop: This is too cheery for killing someone. I quit.
Some hilarious writing prompts

Alright so a few days ago I decided to look for some hilarious text posts on tumblr and I laughed so much I just had to write some prompts! (is possible to be customized)
(Send me requests with 1/1+ prompt/s. I write about a lot of fandoms and also a lot of different things : one shots/scenarios/imagines/headcanons/chats/conversations/aesthetics/alomst anything) REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

*1. Do I look like I give a fuck?
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*2. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on you again for taking advantage of my compassionate and forgiving nature! HOw dare you.
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*3. Me? Overreacting? Probably.
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4. I used to be passive aggressive, but now I’m aggressively passive. Don’t mess with me kiddo. I’ll be right here. I’ll fucking forgive you.
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5. A: Whar are you doing?
B: Avoiding.
A: Avoiding what?
B: Everything.
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*6. This was impulsive. Probably shouldn’t have done it. WHO CARES?
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*7. You’re really cute and it’s ruining my life because I think about kissing you all the time.
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8. A: It’s okay, I’m not mad.
    A (5 mins later): Actually? You can go to Hell.
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9. I hate people who get personally offended when I’m in a bad mood, likeI’m not mad at you Susan (name), I’m mad at the world!
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10. A to A: Bitch, if you actually applied yourself in like…anything, you’d be dangerous ,damn my lazy ass.
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11. I don’t know what I’m feeling, but there’s a lot of it.
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12. Not to dictate your life, but drop your shitty friends.
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13. That sounds like responsibility and I want no part in it.
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14. Why am I better than everyone? Jesus, life’s hard.
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15. A: How do you make someone holy?
B: You beat the hell out of them.
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16. A: I’m amazed of how insignificant we actually are.
B: Not me, I’m important.
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17. If anyone can do it, then someone who isn’t me can do it.
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18. In the old days of one week ago things were different. Now look at us - slightly older than we were back then, other clothes and such.
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19. I’m not going to claim that I know everything, I’m simply going to act like it.
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*20. You have to “see it to believe it”, so as long as I’m not looking I don’t have to believe in anything.
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21. I’m visualising a powerful mystical energy at the moment.
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22. If I don’t learn anything from my mistakes then I don’t have to consider them mistakes in the first place.
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23. Why the hell is there always this one weak bitch in the group that isn’t down with murder? No offence though.
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24. A: If you ever feel stupid, or weak, or powerless, just remember that I, am not.
B: THanks.
A: You’re welcome.
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25. I wanna do dirty stuff with you like farming.
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26. A: What are you reading?
B: 10 tips for beutiful hair the Government doesn’t want you to know.
A: wHAT the fuck?
-
27. A: I’m tired of these constant near-death experiences.
B: (opinional) don’t be a whiny bitch, bitch.
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28. Man, how many eye contact until date?
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29. God has a favourite comedy tv series and it’s called “my life”.
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30. Sometimes all you can say is “yikes” and then just on the fuck on.
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31. Why is everyone having their mid-life crisis at like 19?
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32. It’s a beutiful day to give me money, honey.
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33. Women aren’t complicated, you’re just dumb.
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34. Well this social situation isn’t going the way I acted it out in the shower.
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35. No offence, but my favourite hobby is staying hydrated and beautiful.
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36. I’m actually pretty cool if you give me like 5 tries to get it right.
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37. Today I’m feeling cloudy with a chance of sarcastic.
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38. Be prapared to add a cute emoji next to my name in your contacts list because you’re gonna love me.
-

*39.A: Babe, I’m not grabbing your boob, I’m grabbing your heart.
B: That’s my right boob though.
A: Babe.
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40.Every machine is a smoke machine if you operate it wrong enough.
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41.What makes me feel like a failure the most is when I can’t remember the answet to a Harry Potter trivia question.
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42.I hate it when I’m really nice…And then people are just not that nice? Like what the fuck.
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43.Don’t look at me in that tone of voice.
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*44.Is your name candle? Because I wanna blow you.
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*45. So, was that just awkward eye contact, or were we checking eachother out?-

46.You know, having feelings is ruining my reputation of being a heartless bitch.
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47.My turn ons? Well I don’t know, maybe some fucking common sense.
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48.I may seem like an angry person on the surface, but deep inside I’m actually angrier.
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49.I ship me and that boat.
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50.Listen. I did mean to make you upset and I do think your opinions are shit. But you’re still my friend so it’s okay.
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51.Because my two moods are like glitter and death.
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*52.My kink is closing the fucking bathroom door, because no one wants to see you fucking pee!
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53.If I go to Hell I’m gonna constantly torture everyone by continuously asking if it’s hot in here or is it just me.
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54.Oh my God are you seeing this shit?
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55.Graduated top of my class from Hogwarts school of bitchcraft and misery.

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56.A (shows up at your door 10 years after we had an argument): aND ANOTHER THING

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57.I’ll betray all of you in the Hunger Games.

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58.Well, well, well, if it isn’t my old friend, the dawing realization that I fucked up real bad.

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59.I’m a screamer. Not sexually, just life in general.

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60.I’m not racist, I hate everyone equally.

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61.Tell me I’m cute or something, so I can roll my eyes at you, but then blush when I think about it later.

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62.You know when your hair is greasy and it makes you feel so bad about yourself? And your entire life. Everything is awful because my hair is greasy.

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63.True love is having a crush even when he got a haircut you know.

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64.Emotions? You know, I just push my tear back into my eye and tell it “Not now, you little bastard!”.

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65.Are we gonna hold hands, or what?

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66.My soul leaving my body, but with one of those slide whistle sound effects.

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67.A: I love you.

B: What if I got a bowl cut?

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68.I should really stop planning my future around being rich or famous…but I can’t.

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69.I’m aggressively thibking about having sex with you and trying to keep a straight face at the same time. Do you know hOW hard that is?

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70.My opinion is no.

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71.Did you fall from heaven, because so did Satan.

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72.What to hear a fairytale? Once upon a time you weren’t such a little bitch.

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73.Which is messier - my life or my hair?

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74.How can you face the problem when the problem is your face?

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75.Sometimes I wonder what it feels like to know wHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON.

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76.Read a girl who dates books.

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77.My hands are cold let me put them in your pants.

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78.I’m sorry, you must be at least level 4 friend to unlock my tragic backstory.

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79.My therapist once told me that I have this obsession with seeking revenge…we’ll see about that.

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80.You have lips, I have lips…interesting.

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81.Do my dark undereye circles and unwashed hair turn you on?

/PART TWO/


/170715 ; a Temporary side note: please for the moment don’t send me requests with the numbers that have a (*). I’ve received so many requests with those, I’m starting to run out of ideas :D Thank you ! / - persuasivus

Quotes while reading fanfic

*high pitched screaming*

*reads an embarrassing line and takes a deep breath* *shuts phone off* *takes five million laps around my house* *ignores fanfic but thinks about it for every second for three days straight**comes back to fanfic* “OhH mYy FuCKiNG gOD!!!”

“Why the fuck you lyin’ why you always lyin’, mmmm my god, stop fucking lyin’ ”

“bIITTTCHHHHH”

“This is straight up lies, this doesn’t ever happen”

“Oh my god this fic is terrible….I have to finish it as fast as I possibly can”

“wHat the FUCK THAT MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH TAG WAS NOT FUCKING THERE”

“….what the hell do you mean my ship doesn’t end up together? WHat THE heLl dO YOU MEaN?!”

“They’re like little tiny baby pancakes aweee”

“JUST DO IT ALREADY”

“Where’s the smut?”

“Oh my god there’s too much smut”

“I know this bitch just didn’t….”

“Oh shit am I about to cry? What the FUCK tears?”

“I probably shouldn’t be reading this in church”

anonymous asked:

thoughts on trimberly?

Originally posted by plumkat

Stuff My Mom Has Told Me During Hamilton (Act 1)
  • Hamilton: "Why do they start out with the end? Spoilers!"
  • Aaron Burr, Sir: "How is telling someone you stalked and punched them a sure way to make friends?"
  • "Mom..."
  • "Who's the random French dude?"
  • "Lafayette."
  • "Where did he come from?"
  • "France, mom."
  • "Is this man having sex with horses?"
  • My Shot: "Didn't that guy sing this on Jimmy? The lyrics were different..."
  • The Story of Tonight: "I would not have told you about nights like that..."
  • The Schuyler Sisters: "That poor Peggy...she sounds adorable."
  • Farmer Refuted: "I have no clue what's being said..."
  • You'll Be Back: "Does this apply to what's going on now?"
  • Right Hand Man: "BURR JUST GOT REJECTED!"
  • A Winter's Ball: "With the ladies? Didn't you say he liked John?"
  • Helpless: "Girl this is gonna end bad for you..."
  • Satisfied: "How do you forget your name then - BAM! - now you remember?"
  • TSOT (Reprise): "They're cute when they're drunk."
  • Wait For It: "Wait - is everyone having an affair? You said Alex does right?"
  • "Mom just listen..."
  • "What does this have to do about Georgia?"
  • Stay Alive: "Did they eat horses asses?!"
  • Ten Duel Commandments: "How is General Lee here? Why do they hate him?"
  • "That's Charles Lee...you're thinking of Robert E. Lee."
  • "Oh."
  • Meet Me Inside: "Alexander you gonna get grounded!"
  • That Would Be Enough: "A little Hamilton sounds like a bad idea..."
  • Guns and Ships: "Damn he's fast."
  • History Has Its Eyes on You: "That's some deep shit..."
  • Battle of Yorktown: "I LIKE THIS ONE!"
  • "Mom please - "
  • "THEY WON!"
  • "I know they did mom."
  • What Comes Next: "Wait did he - oh my God. 'Awesome. Wow.' That's how I feel when your father talks about sports."
  • Dear Theodosia: "That's an awful name..."
  • "Mom!"
  • John Laurens Interlude (i had to): "Wait...what?"
  • Non-Stop: "How do you go from something so sad to this?! What the hell?!"
Voltron Code Names
  • Lance: From now on, we will be using code names.
  • Lance: You can address me as Eagle One.
  • Keith: *scoffs*
  • Lance: Hunk is "Been There Done That."
  • Hunk: *chokes on his food*
  • Lance: Keith is "Currently Doing That."
  • Keith: *blushes and looks at the ceiling*
  • Lance: Shiro is... "It Happened Once, in a Dream."
  • Shiro: Wait wha-
  • Lance: Allura is "If I Had to Pick a Girl."
  • Allura: *crosses her arms*
  • Lance: And Pidge is...
  • Lance: Eagle Two.
  • Pidge: Oh, thank god.
Things Bookworms Say/Think as They Read
  • …WHY?!?!
  • Wait, what the heck just happened?
  • OH, i skipped over a page. No wonder nothing made sense.
  • I wish you were real…
  • Daaaaaaamn! this character is hot!
  • I swear to all that is holy is this character dies I will destroy something
  • …well that was a stupid decision.
  • I ship it…like FedEx.
  • Why are you attracted to them?!? They treat you like dirt!!
  • Wow, what a plot twist…(sarcasm)
  • WOAH! What a plot twist!(not sarcasm)
  • Why would you do that?!?
  • …Nope. Nope! That’s it! I’ve had it! I’m noping the f*ck out of this book!
  • Oh God! *bends over in pain* the feels…right in the heart
  • No. Don’t lie to your love interest. Lying only makes it worse…goddamnit.
  • Aw! They’re so good together! <3
  • Do not flip to the end. Do not flip to the end to see what happens. Do not-GODDAMNIT!
  • Oh! I see what you did there author! lol
  • Do NOT hurt my cinnamonroll characters!
  • They’re twisted, cruel, sarcastic, and possibly the most evil person in the universe…they’re mine now. I call dibs.
  • …this book is too small to read without cracking the spine! (mass market books)
  • I’m already reading this book but that book just got in the mail but this other book has been on my shelf for a month…
My Parents Going Through My Tumblr
  • Dad: Why do you post about us?
  • Me: People find you guys funny.
  • Dad: Funnier than you so I get it.
  • Me: Dad.
  • Mom: You should watch your language.
  • Me: My language? I was quoting you!
  • Mom: That's no excuse.
  • Me: Y'all make no sense.
  • Dad: What's a...Jamilton? Is that one of those ships you talk about?
  • Me: Yes. Jefferson and Hamilton.
  • Mom: Ah yes. They have more sexual tension than you and that 'friend' of yours.
  • Me: Mom oh my God.
  • Dad: Is Lams another one?
  • Me: Yes. Laurens and Hamilton.
  • Mom: Well he did shoot someone for Alexander. Even I wouldn't do that for your father.
  • Dad: Yeah she - wait, what?
  • Mom: Oh look people can comment of these posts of yours!
  • Dad: No no let's get back to the previous -
  • Mom: Would you look at that - we're more popular than you AJ.
  • Dad: HA!
  • Me: Oh my God...
  • Me: I mean no one believes y'all said it so.
  • Dad: Well...
  • Dad: That's rude...
  • Mom: You're rude.
  • Dad: The hell woman?

Me: Oh my god it’s already 10:00? I can’t do homework now, it’s too late! I need a good nights sleep so I can face the school day tomorrow head on

Also Me: *reading gay fanfiction* it’s only 3 AM I can read a few more chapters

Voltron Code Names
  • Lance: From now on, we will be using code names.
  • Lance: You can address me as Eagle One.
  • Keith: *scoffs*
  • Lance: Hunk is "Been There Done That."
  • Hunk: *chokes on his food*
  • Lance: Keith is "Currently Doing That."
  • Keith: *blushes and looks at the ceiling*
  • Lance: Shiro is... "It Happened Once, in a Dream."
  • Shiro: Wait wha-
  • Lance: Allura is "If I Had to Pick a Girl."
  • Allura: *crosses her arms*
  • Lance: And Pidge is...
  • Lance: Eagle Two.
  • Pidge: Oh, thank god.
Otp Imagines: Interrupting Prayer

Person A: *smirks* Want to know what I like doing?

Person B: Hmm what pray tell is it?

Person A: Getting on my knees to-

Person C: -PRAISE OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR JESUS CHRIST AMEN!

Person A: tch *rolls their eyes* I was going to say, before I was rudely interrupted-

Person B: That he likes to get on his knees to-

Person C: PRAY TO OUR LORD Almighty GOD!

Person A: TO SUCK HIS DICK!

Person C: Oh lord protect my virgin ears!

Person B: Oh shut up you’re just as bad as he is