(Background: The DM for this wanted us to bring our best Pathfinder characters for this campaign. The party consisted of a kitsune fighter, an orc unchained rogue, a kobold celestial-bloodline sorcerer, a tiefling life-mystery oracle, and my half-elf monk. After fighting our way up out of a dungeon we’d been trapped in — and pretty well depleting our resources in the process — the DM wants his wizard character, the recurring villain of the campaign, to mock us before we actually escape. He does so from the other side of a fifty-foot-wide chasm with no visible bottom.)
Villain: [Standard hammy villain monologue with over-the-top gloating and taunting]
Kitsune: [Orc], will you shoot him to at least get him to shut up?
Orc: Can’t. Out of ammo.
Kobold: Hey, don’t look at me, guys, all I’ve got left are cantrips.
Tiefling: I can barely even see the other side.
Kitsune: Grr. I don’t wanna have to listen to this guy. Does anyone have a ranged attack that can at least get his attention?
Me: Not exactly, but… How wide is that chasm, again?
Tiefling: *Snickers, knowing my monk from another campaign.* Uh-oh…
DM: Uh, fifty feet.
Me: Okay, I spend my last point of ki for the bonus to jump and leap across. This should be a surprise round, right?
DM: (after nearly choking on drink) Um. Okay, yeah, DC 50; I hope you have another character ready. Roll acrobatics.
Me: Don’t need to, the lowest I can roll is a 66 after the point of ki.
DM: (almost spittakes, with the rest of the party either snickering or stunned to silence) Seriously!?
Me: *Presents character sheet.*
DM: *Takes a few minutes to verify the ludicrous number of bonuses.* …Oh goddammit. Yeah, I guess this is happening, roll to attack.
Me: Stunning Fist, get ready for his fort save. *Rolls 17 on the die.* Uh…
DM: (before I can math up bonuses) I hate you. *Rolls a 4 on the fort save.* So. Much. So yeah, he’s in mid-monologue and you launch yourself across a goddamn bottomless chasm and punch the squishy wizard in the face. Roll damage.
Party: *Laughing hysterically!*
Tiefling: Falcon Puuunch!
(Cue the entire table, including the poor DM, completely losing it for the next few minutes. I proceeded to flurry of blows the Big Bad’s right hand man into an unrecognizable pulp over the next two rounds while the party cheered me on. I looted the body, threw him into the chasm, and then could just “take 10” to jump back across. It was my only session in that campaign, unfortunately, but I’m told it took a few weeks for the DM to work out how to get around the damage I did to his plot. I understand he now takes excessive precautions before letting his villains run off at the mouth, since a DC 50 acrobatics check is apparently not enough. This isn’t the first campaign that particular monk has mangled the plot of, either, but it is the most spectacular instance, and the only time she almost wrecked a campaign during its first session.)
henshin bee and civilian bee…. i have a few vague forms of my magical girl outfit laying around so i went about drawing a more finalized one.. (which is where my prompt drawing came from) self indulgent yes but I DO WHAT I WANT
i would love to find an angel aura quartz star pendant HENSHIN ITEM to complete my look someday!! and some properly ripped leggings/jeans tbh
Hey. Guess what?
Sea turtles? I met one, and he was a hundred and fifty years old.
Hundred and fifty? Yup.
Oh. ‘Cause Sandy Plankton said that they only live to be a hundred.
Sandy Plankton? You think I would travel the whole ocean and not know as much as Sandy Plankton? He was a hundred and fifty, not a hundred!
I Just Want You All To Myself Tate Langdon x Reader
Request: @multihxe :Could you do a Tate imagine where he gets jealous because y/n was having a study session with some boy from school and the boy was getting a little too close to her??
Description: You invite a boy over to study and it starts going south, espcially with Tate.
Author’s Note: @multihxe I hope this is what you wanted!! I apologize if it is far from ehat you wanted! Requests are open! Enjoy reading. XOXO
I had just moved to the infamous Murder House in Los Angeles, California, a couple months ago. It wasn’t as bad as I thought moving across the country and starting brand new. The reason why my family and I moved was because my dad had an affair on my mom. My mom isn’t happy. I know that is because anytime my dad tries to hold her hand she takes her hand away from his. Also if he enters the room she has to be at the other side of the room so that there isn’t any arguments. I just don’t get why they don’t just get a divorce. I mean seriously they are both unhappy in their marriage. Even though my mom still says they love each other. I could actually care less. i have someone in my life who loves and cares for me. His name is Tate Langdon. He is one of my dad’s patients. My dad is a psychiatrist. I didn’t really care if he was crazy. At least he is seeking help to get better. It was all really fate how we met. I was just walking downstairs and I bumped into him while going to the kitchen. It was awkward it was just us staring into our eyes. He then broke the tension by laughing. I muttered a ‘Sorry’ and he said ‘Don’t me.’ I guess what they say is true. Love at first sight is real, well for me and Tate that is. There was something wrong with Tate though. The thing is that he is dead. I don’t care though. He admitted to all the wrong things he has done and I couldn’t be happier.
Anyways I was at school at Westfield and was getting my books to go to my next class. I closed my locker shut. When I did there was a jock right behind where the locker was.
“Hey (Y/N)!” Jacob said.
“Hi Jacob. Would you mind getting out of the way for me to go to my next class.” I said while rolling my eyes.
“Oh, come on. Don’t be like that (Y/N). I just want to talk!” He said.
“What do you want to talk about? You better talk fast because you have thirty seconds.” I said.
“Okay well you know that big science test we have?” I shook my head yes.”Well I was wondering if maybe I could go to your house and we could have a study session? Maybe you could help me ace it?” He asked.
“Okay. Meet me at my house at four, okay?” I said not really wanting to let him come over.
“Thanks (Y/N)! You’re the best!” Jacob goes to kiss my cheek but I put my hand infront of my face before he could.
“Sorry but none of that!” I said then he awkwardly left. I went to my last period of the day, Science. Jacob was staring at me the whole time during class. “How am I supposed to help him study if he isn’t paying attention at all?” I mentally groaned. The bell rung and I rushed to get out of the classroom before Jacob could approach me. I arrived at my locker and I grabbed my science textbook and notes to help me study with Jacob. I quickly packed it in my backpack and I ran out the school doors before Jacob could once again approach me. I walk to my car and unlock it. I got in and drove to my house. I quickly got out of my car seeing that both my parents were still out of town for a day trip. I rushed inside to see what time it was and it was three fifteen. I let a sigh out of my mouth as I knew that Jacob wasn’t going to be here soon.
“Hey babe!” Tate said. His voice startled me and I jumped landing in strong arms knowing that it was Tate.
“Hey!” I said and turned around in his arms to see his face. He let go of the frip he had on me and put his arms around my waist while I put my hands on both of his cheeks. “I missed you so much today Tate. Why do you have to be isolated here?” I whined.
“I don’t know but it is worth it to see you come home and be able to be with you as soon as possible. I missed you too.” He said then kissed my forehead. He brought his face closer to mine and I stepped on my tippy toes and kissed him. We had a little make out session in the kitchen but I didn’t care. There was no one there to see it. I broke apart and went to look at the kitchen timer and saw that it was three fifty-eight.
“Oh my gosh! Tate you have got to disappear like now!” I said.
“Why whats going on? Are your parents here?” Tate asked.
“No. I have a friend coming over for a study session.” I said.
“So? I would love to meet them. I think it is about time that you tell your friends that you have a boyfriend.” Tate said.
“Yeah and then whta would happen if they wanted a double date and NOT on Halloween, huh?” I said.
“And that is why you are the smart one in this relationship.” He said.
“Tate, can you PLEASE just disappear?” I begged.
“Okay. I love you” He said.
“I love you too.”I smiled and pecked his lips but then he grabbed my neck and started kissing me more.
“TATE!” I said by being muffled by his lips on mine.
“Okay fine. Bye.” He smiled and said.
Then I blinked my eyes and he was gone. I heard the doorbell ring and I rushed to answer it.
“Hi Jacob.” I said while letting him in.
“Hi (Y/N)! How are you today?” Jacob said and smiled cheekly.
“Are we ready to study?” I said wanting to get this study session over with.
“Yep.” Jacob responded.
“Alright. Follow me.” I said. I closed and locked the door and we walked up my staircase to my room. “Here you can set your bookbag next to my desk on the right.” I said.
“Okay!” He said while putting his bookbag down. I pointed to the two chairs at my desk as saying to sit down here. Jacob did but only after he pulled my chair out.
“Oh, thanks.” I said while sitting down.
“Anything for the lady.” He said. I mentally prayed hoping Tate wasn’t lurking in the corner watching all of what was happening. Little did I know that that was exactly happening. I soon let that thought slip my mind and that was the worst thing to do. I saw Jacob looking through his bookbag over and over again.
“What is wrong?” I asked.
“I might have accidentally left my science stuff in my locker.” He said looking down embarrased.
“Okay. I guess we will just have to share.” I said
“Okay. Sorry.” He said.
“It’s fine.” I said. I started to read section by section. When I was done with a paragraph I would ask him if I needed to explain anything to him and he would usually say yes.
“Can I say something before you continue reading?” He asked.
“Sure.” I said not sure of what he was going to say.
“You are really cute when you are explaining this stuff to me.” He said.
“Um, I think you should know that I have a boyfriend.” I said.
“Well he isn’t here so that means I can do this.” He said.
“That means you can do w—” I tried to ask but his lips met mine and struggled to pull him away from me. He put his hand around my neck and pulled me closer. I couldn’t escape. I started to kiss back. We parted and started to kiss again. My thoughts soon interrupted me. ‘(Y/N)! Are you kidding me? YOU HAVE TATE! STOP KISSING JACOB NOW!’
“Stop! I shouldn’t be doing this. I think it is a good thing for you to leave now.” I said standing up and taking charge.
“Why? I thought you liked me.” He said.
“No! I have a boyfriend! That I am happily with!” I said. Jacob stood up and started approaching me.
“Oh come on don’t be like that!” He grabbed my wrist and pulled me closer to him. We were just inches apart when Tate barged in the door.
“HEY! HANDS OFF OF HER!” Tate yelled. Everything happened so fast. The next thing I know is Jacob is on the ground with Tate on top of him, beating Jacob to a pulp.
“TATE! STOP!” I yelled making Tate stop and look at me.”Run Jacob!” JAcob got up and ran for his life and I heard the front door slam shut and let out the breath I was holding.
“Tate! Why did you do that?” I asked yelling.
“He had his hands all over you! I wasn’t going to let him touch you like that!”
“Yes but I had it undercontrol! I was going to stop him until you barged in and trampled him!” I said.
“YOU DID NOT HAVE IT UNDERCONTROL!” He yelled.
“I DID! IF YOU WOULD HAVE WAITED JUST FOR A COUPLE SECONDS! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO JEALOUS?” I yelled.
“I AM NOT JEALOUS!” Tate said.
“YOU SO ARE! When my guy friend came over here you lurked in the corner and when he just reached over me you started yelling your head off at him. It’s like if a guy just looked at me then you would kill him!” I said.
“Oh I’m sorry that I can’t be protective of my GIRLFRIEND!”
“WHAT YOU ARE DOING IS NOT PROTECTION, IT IS JUST YOU GETTING JEALOUS!” I yelled.
“I JUST LOVE YOU! Is that a crime?” He yelled but then started to cry. “I just love you!” Then he started to cry even harder. Then it made me cry.
“Yes but what you do isn’t what I want. I don’t want to become your…property.” I said with my voice being choked up.
“Then what are you going to do then (Y/N)?” He said.
“I’m going to do something I never dreamed of.” I said while crying and shutting my eyes.
“No please (Y/N). Don’t do what I think you’re going to do.” He pleaded.
“Go away.” I whispered with my eyes shut. When I gained confidence I said it again but louder.”GO AWAY!” I yelled. I opened my eyes adn i didn’t see Tate anymore. I collapsed to the ground and tried to keep my body from shaking.
“I’m sorry (Y/N). I love you.” Tate said but I couldn’t hear it.
The next few days were awful. I didn’t have anything to look forward to when I came home. But i still didn’t want to see him. I want to wait for a little bit. I want him to rethink what he is doing that made me do this to him. My parents started to travel more without me. I was just home alone moping wanting to feel him around me but I knew that it was to early. I was doing this to save our relationship and maybe start again or begin where we left off.
October, Four Months After
I think I am going to let Tate back into my life now. I walked around my house on October 7 calling out his name. I went to the basement.
“Tate? I’m ready now. I’m ready to pick up our relationship. I miss you too much.” I said while walking around. I finally saw him come out of the shadows and I started to cry when I saw his tear stained face with a tear trickiling down.
“(Y/N). Is that you? Really you?” Tate asked.
“Yes baby its really me.” I said. I start running towards him and he picks me up and twirls me around. “I missed you so much. I am sorry for doing that to you but I had to let you know what you were doing and how it bothered me.” I said letting him know the reason.
“I know the time you spent away from me allowed me to think about what was wrong with me. What I was doing wasn’t love it was crazy obsession jealousy. I am so sorry.” He said.
“It’s okay. I forgive. I thank you for protecting me Tate. I love you.” I pulled away from the embrace we found ourselves in.
“I love you (Y/N). I care about your feelings more than mine and I am thankful that you gave me a wake up call if I continued what I was doing.” Tate said. I pulled his neck down to mine and we kissed. We kissed for a long time and it was full of passion and longing for each other.
After that day everything was back to normal. It was the day before Halloween and Tate had told me to go downstairs to the basement. I did.
“Tate?” I said and then turned to walk facing away from the stairs. I turned around I was met with a man in a black suit. “TATE!” I yelled backing away but the man just started walking towards me. “TATE!” I was pressed against the staircase as the man was infront of me pressed against me. All of a sudden I heard him laughing. He unzipped his cap and it was Tate.
“YOU JERK!” I yelled and pushed him.
“I scared you.” He teased.
“Did not.” He then leaned closer to my head and we kissed.
“I really didn’t scare you?” he said as we pulled apart.
“I said no. When are we going to go on a real date?” I asked.
“On Halloween. That’s the only day of the year where I am allowed out of this house.”
“Okay!” I said and pecked his cheek. “What did you want me to come down here.” I asked.
“Oh right! I got you this rose.” Tate said as he handed it to me. I gladly took it. “I painted it black, I know how you don’t like normal things.”
“I think this is the sweetest thing that a boy has ever done for me. Thank you.” I stood on my tippy toes and kissed on the lips. We broke apart. “Is that it? I have to go back to do my homework if thats all.”
“Yes thats it. I love you.”
“I love you too. See you tomorrow for our date.” I winked and started to walk upstairs to my bedroom.
Tonight is when Tate and I were going to go on our date. I got ready for it. I didn’t know where we were going but I knew that anything was going to be perfect with him. A knock came on my door and I opened it to see Tate.
“Are you ready for our date?” He asked.
“Of course I am! Where are we going?” I asked.
“Somewhere that I loved to go when I was in high school, where i could let all the stress free from my head when times got tough.”
“Okay! Do I need to bring anything extra?”
“Nope. If it gets cold you have me to warm you up.” He warmly smiled. We exited the house and started to walk. It was a good fifteen minute walk and then we reached our destination, the beach. We walked over to the lifeguard booth and I sat down on a concrete wall. When I had just sat down I felt my phone buzzing. I took out my phone and I saw that it was my mom calling.
“(Y/N) where are you?” my mom said frantically.
“I’m just hanging with friends.” I said and looked where Tate was and he was fooling around on the lifeguard ‘porch’. “I’m sorry i should have called or left a note. Is this the part where you make me come home?” I said praying it wasn’t.
“Are you safe?”
“Are you having fun?”
“Was there anything that happened while we were gone?”
“There was some banging but I think it was just some little kids playing a prank.” I felt something on my neck and I realized that it was Tate.
“I want you home in an hour.”
“Okay. All right. Bye.” I tried to hang up quickly so I could spend more time with Tate. I finally hung up.
“Who was that?” Tate asked and stopped kissing my neck.
“My mom.” I smiled.
“Oh.” He said. Then he leaned closer to me and kissed me. We pulled apart and we walked down to the beach. When we reached the sand I layed down and he got on top of me and started kissing me again.
We eventually stopped not wanting to get any further. He sat up with me and put his arm around me. He got up and light a fire. Then he returned and sat next to me, pulling me close. I rested my head against his.
“I used to come here when the world would close in and got so small I couldn’t breathe. I’d used to look out in the ocean and think, ‘Yo, scum bag, high school counts for jack. Kurt Cobain, Quentin Tarantino, Brando, De Niro, Pacino.” I looked at him as he turned his head to look at me. “All high school dropouts. I hated high school. So I’d come out here and I’d look at this vast, limitless exspanse. And it’s like, thats your life, man. You can do anything. You can be anything. Screw high school. That’s…that’s just a blip in your timeline. Don’t get stuck there.” He looked at me and I leaned my head on his.
“Very knowledgable Tate. I love you.” I looked at him and kissed him.
“I love you too.” He said when we pulled apart.
“Tate, can I ask you something?” I asked.
“Anything.” Tate responded.
“Why would you get so jealous?” I said with my head leaning in his. He took in a deep breath.
“I would get so jealous because I saw what it did to my parents when my dad didn’t care. When he would just let go. They were so much in love until he stopped caring. I didn’t want that to happen to us. I love you too much but to be completley honest it was because I just want you all to myself. I don’t want to share you. I want you to be with me and only me.” He said and then kissed me deeply.
“I understand Tate. I don’t want that to happen to us either. I will love you forever.”
“I will too.”
That night was filled with love. I didn’t want whatever happened to Tate’s parents to happen to us.
I wouldn’t allow that but I understand why he reacted that way and I can’t say I blame him. I will spend forever with him. No. Matter. What.
YES. something Vietnamese featured in something popular and it’s not bloody
. It’s nigh miraculous. I attribute
to family gatherings where all my aunts are at each other’s throats, loudly yelling over the top of each other that their methodology is wrong. .. it’s a terrifying image to say the least.
Bánh xèo is labour intensive (and it doesn’t taste that heavveeennnly shh) with many components, a bean filling, beansprouts, pork belly, prawns, and an assortment of herbs such as mint and perilla tied off with nước chấm
.The coconut milk and herbs lend a fragrance to the dish that prompts you to effortlessly eat five. As this was a roll, I opted for sriracha as it’s more viscous and one bite will not send you on the immediate hunt for the tissue box. Speaking of, the pancake is to be practically paper thin, think of it like a crepe, the first, oh, fifty or so are fated to be fit for the garbage before you get the hang of it. This recipe itself is interesting. I feel like I can’t give an unbiased opinion as well, they’re things I grew up with and there’s too many associated memories with the ingredients, the That chicken is pure magic that just oozes with flavour from a single bite, I recommend marinating overnight!And the thighs, oh the highs, they seem to melt.. counteracted perfectly with the fragrant herbs, you forget that you’re eating something deepfried as it’s just so crisp and fresh, almost cleansing your insides with each bite. In fact, this almost feels like a cheat
, skipping past the other individual aspects of it, in order to create something fairly similar that can be bonus, eaten from your hands!
Sumire Karaage Roll Recipe
Marinated chicken (500g chicken thighs, 1 tblsp fresh grated ginger, 1 clove grated garlic, 2 tblsp soy sauce, 1 tblsp sake, 2 tsp sugar, ½ small apple and onion, several shakes of cayenne and black pepper, 3 finely sliced birds eye chilli, marinate for at least an hour, best overnight for godly flavour.)
3 tblsp sriracha, 1 tblsp fish sauce, 1 tblsp
nước chấm (this is more sour than spicy)
Slice chicken thighs into 2 cm pieces. Puree apple and onion together in a mini food processor or spice grinder, mix with rest of marinade ingredients;1 tblsp fresh grated ginger, 1 clove grated garlic, 2 tblsp soy sauce, 1 tblsp sake, 2 tsp sugar, several shakes of cayenne and black pepper, 3 finely sliced birds eye chilli, marinate for at least an hour
Mix 200g rice and plain flour, 1 tsp tumeric, pinch of salt, 250ml water, 200ml coconut milk until smooth. The batter should be very thin, almost watery. Set aside.
Dredge chicken pieces in potato starch, the charm is in their differing appearances.
Heat up oil to 180C. Fry until the chicken is brown, remove and raise the heat on the oil. Fry once more until golden 45s-1minute.
Mix 3 tblsp sirracha, 1 tblsp fish sauce and 1 tblsp
. Adjust seasoning.
Heat pan with sesame oil on high. Ladle batter into the pan, swirling so that it coats thinly. (I failed, I am a shame to my ancestors. Thank god, my aunt didn’t pop in for a surprise visit LOL.) Cook for a few minutes then flip and cook for 1 minute.
To serve, lay the
onto a plate and layer lettuce, perilla and mint. Coat the fried chicken in the sauce and top. to wrap, first with the bottom then the sides. Ta dahhh!
Edit to add the process and ingredients list for the marinade.