officialvarrictethras

anonymous asked:

10. Stomach Kiss with F!Hawke/Varric? :3

Also known as: the moment Varric fell in love with Marian Hawke.

Varric’s ears stung as he heard Marian Hawke scream. It wasn’t an intimidating cry, it was one of pure agony and terror. It was followed by a snarl and a distinctly draconian hiss, which cut off into a watery gurgle. The intensity of her cry sent crows flying from their perches, the sound of their wings echoing the fluttering of the dwarf’s mind as he tried to process what was happening.

The forest fell into deathly silence as the birds disappeared. Varric’s mind fell silent too, as fear gripped his throat and his chest tightened. He looked at Anders for a moment before he rushed to where the noise came from, uncomprehending of anything else.

What he saw knocked the breath from his lungs. 

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leftski  asked:

Danse and Maxson?

You are a sin encourager, you best buddy, you! <3

  • Wakes up first.

They both wake up strictly at 5:30 am, although Arthur likes to spoil Danse sometimes by letting him sleep in until 6. 

(they’re both shocked and personally offended to learn that some people *cough* Hancock, MacCready* will sleep in until past noon!)

  • Sings in the shower.

Danse will only sing when he’s absolutely certain he’s alone, and Arthur lives for sneaking up and listening outside. Danse also hums when Arthur washes his hair (he has to kneel to make this happen, and Danse kneeling when they’re both naked often results in ~other things~ happening too)

  • Makes breakfast every morning.

They eat breakfast separately. Danse eats in the dining area of the Prydwen with the other soldiers, and Arthur grabs an apple or something he can eat on the go because he is up and running things the moment dawn breaks. 

Danse is bad at skipping lunch, but Arthur takes care of his fav soldier and often calls him into his room during lunchtime. He has Danse kneel beside him and feeds him part of his own lunch while he does paperwork.

Arthur is bad at staying up late at night doing even more paperwork, because it never fucking ends, and Danse is the one who insists he take a break, at least long enough to eat. When even that doesn’t happen, he’ll set food on Arthur’s desk, nudging it closer and closer until Arthur slowly eats the sandwich, never taking his eyes off the terminal. Danse is unsure if the other man is aware he’s eating at all, but the important thing is he’s being fed.

  • Is the first to think about adopting/having a child.

Arthur has had this shoved down his throat his whole life, that he’s the last of the Maxson line, that it’s his duty to continue it, why hasn’t he chosen a woman and had a child already?? Frankly, he’s sick of it and refuses to think about it at all, especially once he falls for Danse. He silently decides on adoption, he’ll lie and say he knocked a woman up if he has to, he wouldn’t ever cheat on Danse or ask the other man to be all right with him taking another lover, even just once.

  • Gets sick the easiest.

Arthur, from all the stress of being in charge. When he’s sick is one of the very few times he lets Danse take control, and he wouldn’t admit it under literal torture, but it’s so fucking nice to lay back and let someone else take care of him. Sometimes he blows colds out of proportion and gets real fucking melodramatic about the sniffles just so Danse will take care of him ;-;

  • Loves to cuddle.

Danse, who is actually the big spoon, which is another thing Arthur would never admit to anyone, ever. It’s nice to just be held sometimes, and there’s no one else Arthur trusts enough to let down his aura of authority and leadership long enough to allow that sort of vulnerability around. After a particularly rough scene, Danse will spoon Arthur and reassure him that he wasn’t too rough and he’ll always love him and he isn’t just following orders out of fear bc Arthur is the Elder. Danse wraps an arm around Arthur’s chest, squeezing tight on that left man boob, and Arthur will reach up to hold his hand.

  • Falls asleep on the couch while they’re watching a movie.

Arthur, again from stress and exhaustion. Danse rubs his head, and he falls asleep with his head in the other man’s lap, finally looking his (super young) age when he sleeps <3

  • Is super clingy.

Not necessarily clingy, but Arthur is v overprotective and possessive. He doesn’t let his need to protect Danse interfere with any missions and still sends him out into the front lines just as often, but as soon as Danse gets back, he is all over that, checking for injuries, grilling him about what happened, if the rest of his squad conducted themselves properly, etc. Gets jealous super easily and everyone knows not to flirt with Danse, not to touch Danse, some of the new recruits are scared to even look at him when he’s out of his Power Armor, walking around in that skintight orange suit. When he drops something and bends down to pick it up, everyone in the room pivots around and faces the wall.

vasselheims  asked:

Anders' fingers curled into the furred material of Garrett's robes -- the brunet mage's gaze is unfaltering and impassive as they stare at one another. But the abomination's hazel eyes flick the sunburst brand on his lover's forehead, and his resolve is broken. Hot tears trickle down the Warden's cheeks. "No! This should've been ME!" whispers the blond hoarsely. "I wasn't WORTH this, Garrett. Why?" There is a long moment of silence. Garrett finally speaks in a flat voice. "It was you or me."

*inaudible screeching*

vasselheims  asked:

companions reacting to their first kiss with the Sole Survivor? :D

I loved this ask so much that it ended up with me making kissing drabbles for all the romanced companions plus Deacon and Nick. Post ended up pretty long so it’s going under a read more.  Enjoy!

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@officialvarrictethras was posting sad headcanons of Hancock, and I was forced to fight back with my own fluffy headcanon of my agender SS playing Got Your Nose! with a little kid who then sees Hancock and thinks SS stole his nose and never gave it back.

***

Scout and four-year-old Billy stared each other down. Children were great at staring contests. They didn’t know to be embarrassed by prolonged eye contact yet and Scout was pretty sure this one had some sort of mutation that kept his eyeballs moist without blinking. The two had been going at it for forty-five seconds now, and Scout’s eyes were starting to water. At second forty-eight, they reached out and grabbed at Billy’s face, fingers brushing lightly against his little nose, then snatched their hand back and made a fist with their thumb sticking out between their first and middle fingers.

“Got your nose,” Scout teased.

Billy’s eyes widened. “No fair, give it back!”

Scout pretended to think about it. “Hmm. Have you been a good boy?”

Billy nodded quickly.

“A really good boy?”

“Yeah!”

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officialvarrictethras said: Kaidan reacting to the birth of his daaaaaaughter?

F!Shenko. G. FLUFF AND BABIES! (no really this is so fluffy and I’m not even remotely sorry).

Kaidan cursed himself as he rushed through the halls of the hospital. He should have never left. But as the only human Spectre cleared for travel.. he’d had no other choice. Besides, Shepard had said, the baby won’t be here for weeks.

Of course saying something out loud meant she’d cursed them. Because no sooner had Kaidan left on the transport ship had he gotten word that his wife had gone into labor. Getting back home on such short notice had required jumping through an endless amount of hoops, not to mention the added bonus of pissing off the Council and Hackett, but they would just have to get over it.

Skidding to a halt in front of her room, Kaidan took a moment to catch his breath before walking through the door. The room was quiet, dark, only a dimly glowing lamp by the bed providing any light. Shepard was lounging in bed; she looked tired, but happy, gazing down at the bundle in her arms.

“Hey,” he said softly.

“You made it,” Shepard said, beaming at him.

“Not quite it looks like.” He nodded toward the bundle.

“Nah. You made it for the best part. Come say hi to your daughter.” She sat up a bit and held out her arms. Kaidan took the baby as gently as he could, and perched on the edge of the bed. He gazed down at the tiny face swathed in a fuzzy pink blanket with a Varren theme. Where on earth had they found that?

“It’s from Wrex,” Shepard supplied as if reading his mind.

“Of course.”

“He also sent a note saying that he was available for godfather duty.”

“Did you tell him he’ll have to duel Garrus for the title?”

Shepard snorted. “They can work that out themselves. I’m glad the godmothers all decided to be “aunties”. Much simpler.”

He looked up at Shepard. “She’s going to be spoiled rotten, you know that right?”

“Of course she is.” She scooted forward and rested her head on Kaidan’s shoulder.

Turning his attention back to their daughter, reached up to run a finger down her cheek. “Did you ever think we’d end up here?”

“For a long time I didn’t think about it. I couldn’t. It just never seemed like something I would ever have.” She lifted her head to look him in the eye. “I’m glad this is where we ended up though.”

He smiled. “Me too.”

Varric trying not to disturb the Inquisitor as he gets up in the middle of the night to write, because inspiration can strike at any time and he has to get this down before he forgets. 

The Inquisitor wheedling some true stories out of Varric, bit by bit, and he finds that it actually helps to talk about it sometimes, especially to someone who won’t judge him or his friends. 

The Inquisitor challenging Varric to a drinking contest. He’s never been so happy to lose.

Varric and the Inquisitor playing Wicked Grace long into the night as he tries to teach them how to cheat properly, and laughs when the cards just slide out of their sleeves and they bite out a curse that’s only half annoyed. 

Varric letting the Inquisitor knead out all the knots in his back after a long day.

Sappy poetry finding its way into the Inquisitor’s stack of paperwork and Varric watching slyly as they go red and grin - he worked hard on that prose, nice to see it’s appreciated. 

Varric tucking a blanket around the shoulders of an overworked Inquisitor who has, once again, fallen asleep at their desk, ink smeared on their cheek.

The Inquisitor taking Varric’s hand absently and he doesn’t notice until their thumb casually starts to rub little circles into his skin. 

The Inquisitor wearing Varric’s duster and absolutely nothing else as they wander around their room.

vasselheims  asked:

So pretend Varric and Aveline were romance options. Write some more banter -- the other companions commenting on the relationship. :>

“Soooo… you and Hawke, then?”

“So help me, whore…”

“Did you sweep him off his feet? Carry him up the stairs? Have your way with him while he begged for mercy?”

“Shut it." 

—————

"Varric, may I ask you a question?”

“What is it, Daisy?”

“Do you love Hawke?”

“Why do you ask?”

“I’ve just seen the way you look at her. It’s really very sweet.”

“Yeah, I guess I do.”

————–

“Good day, Varric.”

“What do you want, Choir Boy?”

“I simply wished to congratulate you on your union with Hawke.”

“Err… thanks, I guess.”

“Have you any thoughts for when you will have the wedding?”

Wedding?! Who said anything about getting married?" 

————-

"You seem happier, Red.”

“Don’t call me that. …I do?" 

"Yes, there’s this rosy sort of glow whenever you look at him." 

"Shut up, there is not.”

“Look, there it is again!”

—————

“So, you and my sister, then?”

“What’s it to ya, Junior?”

“Nothing, I just thought she had better taste.”

“Oh ho! The little Hawke makes a joke.”

“Shut up, dwarf.”

A parody of Uptown Funk, featuring the stylin’ Dragon Age 2 crew as lead in this rendition by Varric Tethras (background vocals provided by the DA2 crew, especially Fenris and Anders). Hawke is over in the corner jamming on the guitar in a pink suit jacket.

Major thanks and inspiration comes from niklisson and their hilariously wonderful Hightown Funk art which can be found here. —> (x)

Also a great deal of thanks to qunaributts, officialvarrictethras, culllenrutherford and various anons and other followers for helping write the lyrics for this! You’re all the reason I was laughing while trying to record this damn thing.

Again, a link to the glorious person niklisson and their artwork that inspired this. –> (x)

Varric and additional voices/vocals done by: lightgetsout (me!)

And of course all thanks and respects go to Mark Ronson and Bruno Mars for this incredible song.

Hightown Funk lyrics:

This town
That Cone of Cold
Knight-Commander
That Deep Roads gold
This one for them Rose girls
Them dock girls
Straight masterpieces
Stylin’ while in
Yeah, Kirkwall is the city
Got boots on, my chest hair showin’
Gotta kiss myself I’m so pretty.

I’m too hot (Fenris: hot damn)
Call Aveline and Donnic, man
I’m too hot (Anders: hot damn)
Make a dragon wanna retire, man
I’m too hot (Fenris: hot damn)
Say my name you know how I am
I’m too hot (Anders: hot damn)
Am I bad ‘bout those sovereigns,
Break it down.

Girls hit your hallelujah (x3)
‘Cause Hightown Funk gon’ give it to you (x3)

Well it’s Saturday night and we in the spot
Don’t believe me just watch (come on!)

Don’t believe me just watch (x4)
Hey, hey, hey, oh

Stop.
Wait a minute.
Fill my mug put some piss-ale in it.
Take a sip, sign a book
Hawke! Get the check!
Known from Orlais to Denerim, to Antiva City,
If we show up, we’ll be kicked out
Fast enough to make us dizzy

I’m too hot, (Fenris: hot damn!)
Call Aveline and Donnic, man
I’m too hot (Anders: hot damn!)
Make a dragon wanna retire, man
I’m too hot (Fenris: hot damn!)
Say my name, you know who I am,
I’m too hot, (Anders: hot damn!)
Am I bad about those sovereigns, break it down-

Girls hit your hallelujah (whoo) (x3)
‘Cause Hightown funk gon’ give it to you (x3)
Saturday night and we in the spot
Don’t believe me just watch (come on!)

Don’t believe me just watch (x4)
Hey, hey, hey, oh

Before we leave,
Let me tell y’all a little something,
Hightown funk you up, Hightown funk you up; (x4)
Come on, dance,
Jump on it,
If you’re magic, then flaunt it
If you rogue-ish, then own it
Don’t brag about it, come show me

Come on, dance,
Jump on it,
If you’re magic, then flaunt it
Well it’s Saturday night and we in the spot
Don’t believe me just watch (come on!)

Don’t believe me just watch 

Hightown funk you up

Hightown funk you up (Fenris: say whaaaat?)

(and so it continues)!

Thanks for listening!

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