office mug

anonymous asked:

Okay but: captain underpants wearing a "#1 Super Dad" tee-shirt that Harold and George bought him. Just think though

un-fucking-believable that you come to me and have the audacity to suggest Captain Underpants wear anything other than his cape and underpants

i dont have time for fake captain underpants fans

joking aside, he’d probably not really appreciate the gift of clothing all that much. but maybe he’d wear it for a little while after he saw how happy it made the boys

very uncomfortably

The flash sheet I made for THE OFFICE is also up on my Etsy :) Very limited amount made! Hope you like it. https://www.etsy.com/shop/davisriderprints

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More Q cats!! The concept - both Bond giving Q a kitten and the ‘weaponized kitty’ are salutes to Ordinary Numbers - the greatest fic of all time. 

*important note - at least one person expressed concern about Keats’ eye – he and Melville are both rescue cats and Keats was missing it before Q got him (aka he didn’t maim an animal for science!)*

  • Takeo: I know Tao's password so when he is sleep deprived I send e-mails for him from his own account. From the future.
  • E-mail: Tao, at eight AM today, someone poisons the coffee. Do not drink the coffee. More instrucitions will follow. Love, future Tao.
  • M-21: *about to take a sip*
  • Tao: NO! *take mug and throw it out the window*
  • M-21: ...
  • Tao: You'll thank me later.

One last teaser of the flash sheet I made for The Office :) Who wants one?

Best daddy ever… :heart: *Melting* Kind a collaboration between me and @talesofquelfarii She did sketch, I - The rest. Thanks for that Bae! 

Takeshi Sukeruton belongs to her! Hope you like him. (Ah, and also… THE ARTBLOCK WAS  DEFEATED!)

You may NOT use my (And my customer)characters or my art for your Roleplays and other purposes.Do not repost or upload my artworksanywhere without my permission.Just respect my art, thanks!

Die For You (General Hux x Reader)

Prompt:  imagine the reader is in love with Hux, but he’s too proud to admit, until you take a bullet for him and gave Hux confesses feelings in the medical base. ANGST

______________

You followed behind the General, head facing forward, shoulders squared, jaw locked. You didn’t allow your eyes to drift over to the fiery red hair you’d come to love; you didn’t allow yourself to move forward to walk beside him so you could see his handsome face. You felt tears prick behind your eyes as you shadowed him through the Finalizer’s halls.

You’d been General Hux’s personal assistant for about a year, and you’d been hopelessly in love with him for about half of that time. You couldn’t help it; it’s not like you’d wanted to fall for your boss. It had just happened, and now you had to go through your days with the pain of being so close to your love while still being so far.

For a long time, you’d fooled yourself into thinking that it was possible that he cared for you, too. After all, he was always so kind to you, and you were the only person he allowed himself to be at ease with. You were the one person who could make him smile or laugh, and the other crewmembers of the Finalizer were secretly in awe of you and your effect on the cold man. So you’d contented yourself with the thought that maybe, one day, he’d come to feel the same way towards you. That is, until earlier that day.

You stepped into Hux’s office, steaming mug in hand.

“General,” you greeted, smiling. “I thought you’d like some tea.”

The man in question looked up from the data pad he’d been studying and returned your smile.

“Thank you, lieutenant,” he sighed, rubbing his eyes. “Tea sounds perfect right now. Well… Maybe not as perfect as a stiff drink, but I’m on duty. So I suppose this will have to do.”

You grinned wider and handed him the mug, blushing when your fingers brushed his.

“Is there anything I can help you with?” you asked, looking at the pile of datapads he had on his desk.

“Not at the moment, no,” he replied. “These are mostly requests from higher-ranked officials to receive terms of absence from work. Like this one,” he said, picking up a different data pad. “Officer Kentra is requesting a month off to get married. Who needs an entire month to get married?”

You chuckled at his tone and shrugged, leaning against his desk.

“Maybe they want a long honeymoon,” you said.

“Well, all they’re getting is two weeks,” he mumbled, tapping a message on the tablet. You considered him for a moment, savoring the seconds you were able to spend alone with him.

“Do you think you’ll ever get married?” you heard yourself saying. You bit your lip, wondering why you’d said that as Hux paused and looked up at you.

“Why do you ask, lieutenant?” he questioned, quirking an eyebrow.

“I-I don’t know,” you stuttered. “Curiosity, I guess.”

“Well, let me put your curiosity to rest by saying no,” he stated, snorting. “I haven’t the time nor the patience for such an arrangement.”

“So…” you murmured, feeling your heart sink, “I’m guessing you’ve never been in love?” Hux never broke eye contact with you as he replied.

“No. Nor will I ever be.”

That had been a few hours ago, and now you were accompanying him to a meeting with Captain Phasma during which you’d be taking notes. You still felt like a fool for asking him those questions, and you hated yourself for being disappointed in how he’d answered them. What were you expecting him to do? you asked yourself. Confess an undying love for you? Yeah, right. Like he said, he’d never fall in love. Especially with you.

Sighing, you blinked your eyes rapidly as you two walked around another corner, banishing the lingering tears in your eyes. However, your sadness was quickly replaced by panic when you looked up to see someone running directly for you and the General with a blaster in hand. The person was obviously not with the First Order, and you didn’t have time to wonder how he’d gotten on board before he was pointing his weapon at Hux.

“No!” you cried, stepping forward. Your mind went blank; you thought of nothing else other than the man you loved and protecting him. You leapt forward and threw yourself in front of Hux as a shield just as the assailant pulled his trigger, and a searing, blistering pain in your shoulder let you know that he’d struck home. You watched as nearby troopers swarmed the man, tackling him to the ground just as you felt your knees give out, and you felt yourself being caught by the General, who quickly cradled you in his arms.

You looked up, fighting to keep your eyes open. Your love’s face was twisted into an expression of panic and fear, and he kept shouting your name.

“(Y/N)? (Y/N)! Wh-why…” he shook his head, frozen in place as your eyes began to close. Suddenly jolted into action, he looked up and started sprinting, carrying you through the halls towards the medical center.

“Why did you do that, (Y/N)…” he groaned as he ran. “Why in blazes would you do something that stupid…”

“Because,” you sighed quietly, feeling yourself drift towards unconsciousness. “I-I love you….”

The General looked down at you, and you were shocked to find tears in his eyes.

“And you only thought to tell me now?” he choked, panting as he ran as fast as his legs could carry him. “Stars, I’m a fucking idiot…”

“N-no,” you breathed, shaking your head weakly. “You’re not… I’m sorry, Armitage…”

And with that, you felt yourself give in to the darkness, not hearing the choked cry Hux let out as you did so.

_____________________

When you came to, you first felt the pain. A strangled moan left your parted lips as you became conscious of the heavy ache that was coming from your shoulder, and you hissed when you felt someone touch the arm it was connected to.

“(Y/N)?” a familiar voice said, and you fought to open your eyes. When you finally did so, you were greeted with the face of none other than General Hux as he leaned over your bed.

“Hux?” you asked weekly. You looked around and surveyed the hospital room you were in. A heart monitor next to you was beeping in time with your heartbeat, and a long, gray curtain cut your room off from prying eyes. Your head lolled back around painfully to go back to watching the General, and you confusedly took in the dark circles under his eyes and the messiness of his usually pristine hair. “What happened?”

“You almost died, (Y/N),” he answered. You watched as his face slowly morphed into an angry expression, and you frowned as he spoke to you. “What the hell did you think you were doing? You could’ve been killed.”

“I would’ve died protecting someone I love,” you said, turning away bitterly. “Not that I’d expect you to understand.”

“(Y/N),” he said, and you winced at the darkness of his tone. “Look at me this instance.”

You gulped and turned towards him, and you were surprised to find that he no longer looked angry, but instead a deep sadness was etched into his features.

“You will never understand the depth and sincerity of the love I have for you,” he breathed. Your eyes widened, and you looked on in shock as he reached forward to take one of your hands. “I was too proud to admit it,” he sighed, studying your fingers as he spoke. “I was too afraid of rejection to tell you. But I do. I love you. And it physically pains me to think that you could have died without knowing it.”

Your eyes filled with tears, and you bit your lip as you looked at him.

“Is that really true?” you asked, not daring to hope he was being honest. But he nodded his head, finally meeting your gaze.

“It’s been true for quite some time,” he answered. Hesitantly, he leaned forward, eyes darting all over your face, and softly, gently, he pressed his lips to yours. You let out a sigh through your nose and returned the kiss, laying completely still for the fear that you’d wake up from whatever dream you’d found yourself in. You didn’t wake up, though, and Hux eventually pulled back to press his forehead against yours.

“I wouldn’t be a good man to be in a relationship with,” he muttered. “I’ll constantly be working, and it’s dangerous to be in charge of such a huge army. I can’t guarantee that you’ll be happy with me. But, if you allow me, I’ll try my hardest to make you feel as loved and cherished as you truly are every day for the rest of my life.”

Your breath caught in your throat, and you brought your hands up to cup his cheeks.

“Yes,” you sighed against his lips. “Yes, Armitage.”

With that, he pressed his lips to yours once more, and you let your eyes close as you finally, finally, kissed the man you’d been in love with for so long.

Haikyuuiverasry Fic Recs (Part 2)

Wow ok I honestly didn’t expect the fic recs to go over that well, but since they did, I’m also providing a list of some of my absolute favorite incomplete (but still updating) fics! Also you should have seen the preliminary list there were like 50 fics on it I had to narrow it down a lot.

  1. Say You’ll Remember Me (IwaOi) Absolutely one of my favorite fics in existence. It doesn’t hurt that the author is very sweet. If I were to recommend one fic out of all of these for you to read and subscribe to, this would be it. Also if you read the comments from ButterflyCrossing (my AO3) from chapter 4 onwards, you can see my shenanigans of guessing Seiji’s dad.
  2. your voice is my favorite color (TsukiYama) Tsukishima has synesthesia and is rather insecure about it, but this is really good.
  3. boiled frogs (MatsuHana) Like if ya’ll ever wanted an angsty but well written matsuhana fic about them pining after each other but also dating other people because they’re complete dumbasses, this fic is the way to go.
  4. Hot Pink (IwaOi) A plauge was slowly killing off all humans, so they designed synthetic bodies and many people have made the transfer. IwaOi is a non-synthetic and synthetic power couple, and they accidentally make an enemy who wipes Oikawa’s memory banks.
  5. OUT! (Yamaguchi/OC) Oikawa comes out as “Japan’s First Gay Athlete” and Yamaguchi tries to figure out whether this is a good thing or if everyone will be able to tell he’s gay now.
  6. Scattered Light (KageHina) Kageyama the colorblind musician meets and develops a crush on Hinata the deaf painter. It’s actually super cute.
  7. it’s lonely on jupiter (IwaOi) I’m just gonna quote the summary and tell you that it’s an amazing fic. “oikawa’s always loved aliens but never thought he’d actually fall in love with one”
  8. Mud, Stars, and You (IwaOi) Oikawa the model needs some extra cash, so he works on a farm for a bit. There he meets and crushes on Iwaizumi, who isn’t all that interested… at first.
  9. Guns and Roses (IwaOi) DO YOU WANT YOUR HEART TO BE RIPPED OUT OF YOUR CHEST ON A WEEKLY BASIS? BECAUSE A REALLY REALLY GOOD MAGICAL GIRL AU IS MAKING YOU CRY? WELL THEN THIS IS THE FIC FOR YOU. JESUS THAT LAST CLIFFHANGER (it really doesn’t matter when you’re reading this it’ll still be an accurate statement)
  10. The Tengu and the Prince (KageHina) This is a beautiful fic with like folklore and drama and love and its so great read it.
  11. Leviticus 20:13 (KurooTsukki) This is the fic that actually made me start shipping KurooTsukki so you know it’s gotta be good. Tsukki is trying his darndest to be the perfect little christan boy but then bad boy Kuroo appears and he can’t hide his sexuality anymore.
  12. Ravaging (YakuLev) Lev reluctantly goes on vacation with his family and there meets and falls for Yaku. Also featuring Haiba Alisa in later chapters because the author loves her, I love her, and the fic started before she was introduced but she’s too cool not to be added.
  13. One Year (Gen, Multi) Yachi and Ennoshita are college students studying the Suila (basically omegaverse humans who had a war a long time ago with the normal humans) and are able to score a trip to the island where the Suila have lived, isolated, for hundreds of years. Some of the Karasuno pack is welcoming, others, not so much.
  14. I’ll wait with you in rain or snow (DaiSuga) WOLF CHILDREN AU OMFG AND IT HAS ART YOU GOTTA READ IT
  15. Shoreline (KageHina) Kageyama the merman meets Hinata the human. They become friends despite Kageyama’s initial apprehension, as Daichi has told him time and time again that humans are BAD.
  16. new phone who dis (IwaOi) Please read this it’s in the form of text messages and it’s so beautiful. Oikawa complains to the wrong number about ushiwaka, but iwa-chan listens anyways.
  17. Arrest me Officer (IwaOi) Oikawa is mugged, and falls for the hunky police officer trying to help him. Iwa-chan just wants to do his job, and has enough distractions with Kuroo, Bokuto, and Lev on the force.
  18.  A Way to Fly (Gen) Have you ever wanted a firefly au? Well look no further, here is the thing!
Kink Request- Jerome x Reader

I was asked to write this using Jerome x Reader with the challenges Sensory deprivation, loud sex noises and someone watches. Enjoy!

Content- Adult content, sexually explicit, smut, kink, oral, penetration, mild knife play (no blood)

Originally posted by miravnda

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Kamikaze 1/3

Prior to Russian Roulette.

→ Reader x Kai

→ A popular call girl is hired by a rich CEO to ruin his old friend Kai’s career and life.

→ Warnings: Angst/Thriller. Mentions of sex.

Word count: 1,8K


I had only expected another normal call.

Normal in my sense though, you know - the same greasy guys that had absolutely no chance to have sex with, I suppose, a normal person. They would hit me up with the same cringe-worthy ‘heey’ every time but it was alright because that was my job and I had gotten to this point in my life myself. I was alright.

But this- this was so far from normal.

Only a couple of minutes before I officially closed my line for they day, the phone had rung obnoxiously, startling me out of my small and cozy nap. I was prepared to kindly tell this person calling that he was a bit late and that I would not be able to schedule anything with him now- and that he could call earlier tomorrow.

Grabbing the phone and saying hello into the line, I was shocked to not hear another greasy ‘hey’ but instead a mature and deep voice speaking quickly. He spoke so fast and curtly that I was almost not able to understand anything. When I was finally able to focus, the voice stopped.

“Eh.. Hello?” My jaw was slack and I was only able to stare with wide eyes into the grungy wallpaper of my small apartment. I made a quick, internal note to starts saving some money to fix the place up.

The voice on the other side chuckled before sighing and starting again; slower this time. 

“Is this Y/N?”

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Iwa-senpai's Fanfiction Recommendation List!

I have gotten a few requests on my Instagram (iwaizumi_hajime) on what some of my favorite fanfictions are, so I figured that I would post them here on my tumblr! I have fanfiction from three series; Haikyuu, Diamond no Ace, and Big Windup. I love getting recommendations from everyone, too, so if you don’t see something on my list, don’t be shy to tell me so that I can read it :)


Disclaimer: I may or may not edit this in the future, so keep your eyes out for more!

** = definite favorite, 10/10 would recommend!

this is really long and obnoxious, I apologize for being obsessed.


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godxofxchaos  asked:

ⅎ - Kiss my muse and hug them, telling them “I am always here if you need me”

Thran could tell something was wrong with Seth being upset. Finding the god in his office, he placed a mug of tea down on his desk. “You wanna talk?”