ocd-queen  asked:

Oh my goodness I just woke up & saw your response to one of my asks. Thank you so so much for defending me!!! ヽ(;▽;)ノ You really are the sweetest most amazing person ever, you are a real cinnamoroll ♡ That really meant the world to me! I can't begin to thank you enough

No one deserves to be treated like that for their coping methods or their experience with something, whether it’s sexism, trauma, mental illness, etc. 

It’s a URL for crying out loud. If your coping method was kicking babies and you were the queen because you participated in an annual secret baby-kicking competition, and ain’t no one dethroned you, then yeah, people can be pissed at you and be like HEY WHOA WTF NO—but that’s just the thing! 

These people don’t care about the harm that happens in the real world, they care about calling out fantasized social violence by finding people to bark at. Just BARKBARKBARK and no listening at all, ever. No questions, just screaming.

Things change when you listen. People and communities and societies change when you just zip it for once, and listen, even if you don’t agree! Even if you’re talking to a white supremacist (seriously watch the video), if you listen instead of defaulting to yelling, if you actually ask questions, engage, have a conversation instead of a OMG UR PROBLEMATIC screaming match, you make a change.

Dialogues change our future for the better. Not completely absurd accusations based on literally nothing but the words that make up the link to your account.

People like that, deep into Bad SJ, think activism means YELL A LOT!! INSULT PEOPLE PERSONALLY! because oooh, it feels so good. It tickles them to feel the power of making someone feel horrible with their words.  

But somehow, most of them still haven’t realized that they became the monster they set out to fight. It’s kinda why I’ve been thinking of the nasty ones as Social Justice Werewolves. At some point, hopefully, they didn’t devote their days to bullying people. But now they say they do it to protect people from bullying, from sexism, from abuse, etc.

(Can that be a skit? Person is a kind, patient, compassionate activist who listens and tries to educate respectfully whenever an opportunity presents itself (thought without exhausting themselves, of course!)… and on the full moon… “rrrOOOOARRRRR CISHET SCUM!!!!!!!!!!!”

Anyway. DUDE. 

I’m sorry that you had such a poop experience like that! But we are here for ya! We do not tolerate that kind of behavior here. The more we repeat that, and talk to them about why that behavior is not okay, maybe we can finally get rid of a lot of the stuff that seems to be infecting every community/fandom/online group.