obliviate forever

Peter makes a mix-tape for Tony and they’re all love songs because Peter’s hoping that Tony gets what he’s trying to say. 

Tony, forever the oblivious because he thinks no one could ever love him, finds the mix-tape to be amazing and thanks Peter with a pat on the back.

Peter has never face-palmed so hard in his life. 

anonymous asked:

Todoroki being te oblivious child though makes it EVEN FUNNIER when you consider he's the one who actually noticed and pointed out that Izuku and All might's quirks/ fighting styles are so similiar and asked if he was an illigetimate child

[in reference to this post]

ACTUALLY

the only reason he was paying attention to that was because he overheard a convo between Iida and Uraraka lmao

who knows how much of this he might’ve noticed otherwise, if he hadn’t overheard that one convo between them, haha

Todoroki is forever the oblivious child, and i love him for it

Ain’t it fucking sad how we crave someone so immensely for so long, and every second of the day we lose to infatuation is forgotten? And that lover we build a shrine to is forever oblivious to the sound of us drowning in the beautiful ocean of thoughts that consumes us, leaving us in cold, cold darkness.

Yet still, the most sickening thought by far is the possibility that our pain could be matched by an equal, invisible desire of the one we dream of, for us, and as our tired hearts cry out for each other, we only suffer in silence.

—  (My journal)

a random list of all the sawamura eijuns that i think about

  • sawamura eijun with his hair pushed back 
  • sawamura “wait i have to pet this dog and play with him a little bit before i move on” eijun 
  • sawamura eijun: great with kids, or just one of the kids?
  • of course i know how to make flower crowns! i have wakana teach me after all!” 
  • sawamura “forever singing doing menial tasks” eijun 
  • sawamura “im not a genius but i sure as hell am so much better than all you baseball idiots in all the other sports gah hahaha” eijun 
  • sawamura “GEH FURUYA WHY ARE YOUR FISHES ALWAYS BIGGER THAN MINE?!” eijun 
  • sawamura “i know a shitload of useless facts and home remedies that work 100% of the time” eijun 
  • sawamura “let me warm up your bed when you have a cold” eijun 
  • aka that is in fact a real thing. 
  • alternative medicine major, sawamura eijun. university au. in which eijun loves taking care of his sick flatmates because this means a chance to try out all these home remedies he’s come up with. and oh my god, they all taste so disgusting and sometimes they’d much rather stay sick than have to drink that weird concoction eijun’s made for them. but holy shit, it actually works. 
  • literature major, sawamura eijun. i just love eijun + books. as much as i love eijun + shoujo manga, i love eijun + classical/historical literature more. i thought it was adorable how he was reading the book of five rings during his yips. i actually tried to read that book, and holy hell it was boring af. and remember the time he tried to pick up crime and punishment ???? 
  • sawamura “i turn to books for inspiration whenever im doubting my abilities” eijun. 
  • sawamura eijun the human heater. in which everyone loves to cuddle with eijun during winters because his body is so damn warm. 
  • sawamura “what do you mean get a dog?! i promised my childhood dog that i will never ever replace him! we spent every minute together and now he’s gone up to doggy heaven. i can’t just get another dog” eijun. 
  • sawamura “talking to plants will make them feel loved and grow stronger” eijun. 
  • sawamura “sometimes haruno and wakana sends me american pop music videos and i like to sing them during practice and copy their dance moves. im actually very good at singing and dancing. holy siht did you know i could do this?”  eijun
  • oblivious flirt and forever charming random girls w/ his brash yet sunny personality 
  • sawamura “all the moms love me” eijun. 
  • what the fuck sawamura? are you just plain stupid or actually a genius?” 
  • “yeah i know how to knit! what of it?! my obaa-chan said being able to create things with your bare hands is very manly! even wakana agrees!” 
  • sawamura “sometimes i use wakana’s name to stop kuramochi-senpai from teasing me of these random hobbies he deems as ‘girly’” eijun.

braezenkitty  asked:

For the prompt thing: Destiel and "You smell really nice." Your choice if it's angsty or fluffy or smutty :D

Ack! I did even worse  - 484 words! I’ll never get the hang of this!

______________

Cas and Dean sat squished together on the tiny couch in Dean’s basement, as they’d done for years on end, video game controllers in hand. Though, being teens who’d gone through a few growth spurts, there was a lot less room on the couch then there’d used to be.

Dean didn’t mind. It was one of the only times he could get away with being in such close proximity as Cas without being obvious about it and scaring him off. That was one of his worst fears.

Cas shifted against him, moving his body with his controller – something Dean had teased him for many times. Like moving his controller would change the actions on the screen – and Dean’s breath caught.

Today, the teasing words died in his throat as Cas’s scent hit Dean’s nose more strongly than ever before when he moved, Cas crowing as Dean lost and Cas won.

Dean blinked and tried to stop breathing. He loved the smell of Cas – something so indefinably him that Dean had never been able to put a name to – and it seemed more intoxicating today than it usually did.

Cas paused as Dean remained unresponsive beside him, “Dean? Are you all right?”

“You smell really nice,” Dean blurted out, eyes instantly widening in horror at his unthinking, yet oh-so-true words. His controller dropped from numb hands and he slapped one over his mouth, mumbling around his fingers, “Oh god! I’m so sorry, Cas! I-I-“  

What could he say? What could Dean possiblysay to wipe out the last 30 seconds, to erase that look of shock on his best friends face? Cas would never want to remain friends after this. Dean closed his eyes, throat closing up - only to feel Cas’s hands pull down the one covering Dean’s mouth, clasping it between his own.

“Please don’t hate me,” Dean whispered, still not daring to open his eyes.

“Why would I hate you?” Cas asked, the wonder in his voice finally giving Dean the courage to actually look at him and see…

That Cas was smiling.

“Be-because I – I think I love you, Cas, and…” Dean stuttered to a halt as Cas’s smile broadened into a shy grin.

“Thank god, because I love you too, Dean,” Cas said quietly.

“You do?”

“Yeah. You know what else?” Cas leaned in, their noses touching. Dean shook his head, green eyes trapped by blue. “I think you smell good too.”

Sam stood frozen on the bottom step of the stair, afraid to move as he watched the whole thing unfold. His brother and Cas had been oblivious for forever and he wasn’t going to risk killing the moment when they finally had their breakthrough. But as the older teens met for a few soft kisses, Sam covered his eyes.

Sure, he was glad they’d finally figured it out, but did he have to be around when they did?

anonymous asked:

Could I have some scenarios where Kuroo, Tsukki, Tendou, Daichi, Yaku, Daishou and Iwaizumi are getting it on with their s/o and then their mom/older sister or someone walks in on them ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ) (im sorry for my sins and what I'm doing to these poor children pls forgive me)

Kuroo:

It’s been so long since Kuroo and his s/o got any alone time. Hana-chan, his little sister of four, was in the basement three floors down with his mother, and planned to be down there for a long time.
Or that’s what he thought.
He was lost in his world as he slammed into his partner, peppering their neck and jawline with rough kisses. His pace was quick and even, dragging sultry purrs out of his s/o.
Then his bedroom door slammed open. He stopped his movements, flipping over on his side and keeping his s/o close to his chest. If it was his mother at the door, he was sure he was in for a long, long teasing session later that night. But it wasn’t, it was Hana-Chan. His heart started hammering faster in his chest, darting between his s/o and his sister.
“What’re you doing, Tetsu?” She peeped, keeping her stature at the door frame. Kuroo swallowed thickly, his hands tightening around his s/o’s back.
“Me and __ are just cuddling here…” He stuttered, hoping the toddler would just nod and walk off and forever be oblivious to his actions. But of course, she didn’t, because the worst case scenario always had to be inflicted on him.
“Can I join?” She asked, waddling into the room.
“Nope! Nope!” He called out, his bare chest peeking out from underneath the duvet.
“Tetsu-nii, why are you shirtless?”
“Leave!”

Tsukishima:

The moment Akiteru walked into Kei’s room while his s/o was going down on him, he did nothing but glare. Akiteru looked horrified, his mouth agape, as if he was going to scream. His s/o didn’t even notice that they had a visitor, and Kei planned on keeping it that way. He ran his hair through his s/o’s hair, letting a lewd over-sexual moan erupt from his lips.
“Mm, yes __, just like that…” He rolled his hips, her lewd sucking noises only increasing the tension between siblings. He then shot a smirk towards his brother, who looked as if he were to gag. Akiteru squeezed his eyes shut, whining in pain. His s/o didn’t seem to notice, or maybe she did, because she took the entirety of Kei’s cock in her mouth, and exaggerating her every action. With a satisfied huff, Kei flopped back on the bed, letting pleasure wash over him. That would teach Akiteru not to ask about his sex life anymore…

Tendou:

His mom told him she would be home at 6 o'clock, and it sure as hell wasn’t 6 o’clock. His s/o was on top of him, riding him quick and diligently, her hands running along his upper torso. Soft whines spilled from his lips, his hips bucking up to meet his s/o’s. He heard the soft clicks of high heels from outside his bedroom door, and he immediately froze up, hands flying over his mouth. He wasn’t going to stop his s/o, he didn’t care enough to end something as wonderful as this. He figured he was safe though, his bedroom door was securely locked. Although, to his horrible demise, his mother knocked.
“Satori, hun, are you home? Sorry I came home a little early, I didn’t have any more meetings so I decided to leave…” she trailed off. His s/o paled, eyes widening and darting towards the door. When she saw it was locked though, she relaxed, bending over to kiss Satori’s jaw. He gulped, his hands leaving his mouth and weaving into his s/o’s hair.
“Yeah ma, it’s ok. Um, the door is locked, __ is over, we’re watching a show…” He trailed off, biting his lip to stifle a whine. His mother kept chatting away though, saying it was so nice how he finally had a friend over, and asking questions about his day. His s/o was making it so, terribly hard for him to respond, though. She wouldn’t stop rolling her hips, kissing his neck as he struggled to get his words out clear.
His mother finally walked away, and Tendou realized he had been holding his breath. He finally let out a painful whine, his chest rising and falling heavily.
“You’re such a bad girl…”

Daichi:

When his mom walked in on him, slamming into his s/o from the behind, there was no hiding his actions. He locked eyes with his mother, immediately freezing up. His s/o whined, obviously embarrassed.
“Hi, Mrs. Sawamura…” his s/o peeped up, speaking for her malfunctioned boyfriend. Mrs. Sawamura chuckled, turning around on her heel.
“Well, Daichi, darling, at least you’re using a condom.” She huffed, slamming the door behind her. “And dear? If I can hear you from my bedroom, I’ll have no choice but to walk in again.”
Daichi pulled out of his s/o and rested his head in his hands.
“I’m not in the mood anymore, do you just wanna cuddle?” He groaned, grabbing his boxershorts off the floor.
“Yeah, I don’t think I can ever face your mom again…”

Yaku:

Sometimes, Lev thought it was nice to show up spontaneously at his house. Yaku figured, that he had showed up yesterday, there was no way in hell he would today.
Oh, but he did, and we walked straight into Yaku’s bedroom without knocking, or calling, or anything. At the sight of the tall boy, Yaku screamed, causing Lev to scream, and for the hell of it, his s/o chimed in too.
“Get out!” He shouted, hands fumbling around for the nearest possible object, which happened to be his history textbook, and throwing it at Lev. He yelped, dodging it and slamming Yaku’s bedroom door behind him.
“I’m sorry!”
“Damn, you better be!”


Daishou:

The moment he heard a knock at the door, Daishou was already on the floor, quickly pulling on his sweatpants and t-shirt. There was no way in hell he would ever let anyone see him at his most vulnerable state. He hissed at his s/o to pull the blanket over them and sleep, or at least pretend to. His brother walked in moments later a narcissistic, shit eating grin on his face. He took a seat at Daishou’s office chair, swiveling around like a powerful mob boss.
“You look like shit.” He snorted, scanning Daichou from head to toe. He gulped, shoving his hands into his sweatpant pockets.
“Thanks.”
“Why’s your girlfriend in your bed.”
“She’s sleeping.”
“Okay.” He smirked, standing up from the office chair and motioning towards the floor. “Cause everyone sleeps with naked at their boyfriends house.”
“You’re twelve, what the hell do you know.” Daishou frowned, grabbing the kid by the arm and throwing him out of the room.
“I’m thirteen, fuck you.” He stuck his tongue out, crossing his arms over his chest. “And I know I can ruin your life if I go and tell mom.”
Daishou groaned, kicking his brother hard in the shin.
“You say anything, and I’ll have you crucified.”


Iwaizumi:

He knew locker room sex was just about the most risky thing ever, but he still went for it. His worst nightmare would be an unwanted visit paid by Oikawa, so that’s why he waited until the gym was completely vacant, to drag his s/o into the locker room to get some much needed intimate time. Her parents were always home, and so were his, so the only place he could think of where they wouldn’t be interrupted was here.
But he was wrong.
Twenty minutes into their rendezvous, clothes and undergarments spewed across the floor, a loud band was heard, and some footsteps. Iwaizumis s/o started pounding on his shpoulders to let her down so she could futilely attempt to get her clothes on and run. But he was frozen like a deer in headlights, his grip still tight on her thighs.
Moments later Hanamaki peered around the corner, a shit eating grin plastered on his face.
“Forgot my Kobe’s” He laughed, only laughing harder, when Iwaizumi face flushed red.
“Don’t worry Iwa-Chan.” He then mocked, spinning on his heel to walk out. “I’ll only use this situation for blackmail purposes.”

Dirk/Todd ship ask

@lovingvincent requested I do this for the ship ask. Send me your DGHDA ships and I’ll fill in the questions below accordingly!

Who Hogs the Duvet? I definitely think it would be Todd. In the first episode we saw Dirk sleeping above the covers in his bed, plus imagine Todd rolling over in his sleep and yanking all the sheets with him? Dirk doesn’t mind, but he will tease his cute boyfriend about it in the morning just to see Todd’s cheeks flush with embarrassment. 

Who Texts/Rings to check how the others day is going? Dirk for sure. He does it at the most inconvenient times to. He’ll be hiding from a rather dangerous suspect and he’ll just decide to text Todd to see what’s up because if the universe wanted that scary guy to find him/kill him it would’ve happened already, duh. Todd also does love the text messages he gets from Dirk, but at one point  his detective does mention in a text that maybe he might need saving send Farah or yourself please! Xx 

Who’s the most creative when it comes to gifts? Dirk! He’s very creative, he learned how to make cool things when he was in CIA holding. There wasn’t much to do and well, there was a lot of toilet paper, so he made a bouquet of thin papered roses almost every week. Eventually Riggins gives him a crafting kit. Dirk makes Todd wind chimes out of guitar picks he found lying around the apartment.

Who Gets Up First in the Morning? Todd does. He’s used to getting up at the crack of dawn for his old jobs, and every morning he sits at his coffee table with a hot cup of coffee resting between his hands and a cigarette hanging from his parted lips. He watches the sun rise over Seattle from his single apartment window and waits for Dirk to stir awake around noon. 

Who Suggests New Things in Bed? Todd. Dirk isn’t really experienced sexually so Todd usually has to take control in that area. 

Who Cries at Movies? Tbh, as obvious of a choice as it sounds it’s Dirk. One time Todd suggested they watch El Dorado and wtf Dirk just started bawling when Tulio was going to leave Miguel. Very emotional stuff. But one time Todd cried from laughing so hard at the sheer ridiculousness that is the Bee Movie. 

Who Gives Unprompted Messages? Dirk. He likes to send Todd pictures of cool rocks or things he sees at the grocery store. Sometimes he’ll send a funny video of the cat shark making growling sounds as it eats. Todd saves everything Dirk sends him. 

Who Fusses Over the Other When they’re Sick? Todd get’s very worried about Dirk one day when he see’s Dirk coughing up his lungs and sniffling a lot. When Todd presses the palm of his hand against Dirk’s forehead and feels the warmth of a fever. He makes Dirk go lay down in Todd’s bed and force feeds him chicken soup and holds his hair back when Dirk pukes. At one point Todd comes home from a trip to the store with every form of cold medication he could find and starts fixing up his ill lover. 

Who Gets Jealous Easiest? Dirk. One time Todd was getting flirted with at the bar they went to together and Dirk was not having it. Todd has never heard the word boyfriend used so much in a sentence before but by the point Dirk had finished the person who’d been flirting with him had left. 

Who Has the Most Embarrassing Taste in Music? Dirk. He loves K-pop and underground rave music. 

Who Collects Something Unusual? After Dirk brings home yet another trophy item from a case, this time it’s a hand sized frog statue Dirk ripped off the side of a crumbling fountain edge, Todd has to say enough. Or at least, Todd has to rent a storage space because there isn’t enough room in either of their apartments for this much memorabilia. 

Who Takes the Longest to get Ready? Both. Their bathrooms are cluttered with different skin and hair products, and Dirk takes to long trying to find a humorous tie to go with his vibrant outfit while Todd is still in the shower. 

Who is the Most Tidy/Organized? Todd! He needs his living space to be clear of clutter and to smell like Pine-Sol. Dirk likes to leave his dirty laundry all over the bedroom and every morning Todd silently murmurs curse words and picks all the crumpled articles and washes them while his lover is sleeping soundly. Todd also has to wash all the dishes they use because one time Dirk broke a plate in the sink and cut his thumb and now Todd doesn’t trust him to handle washing them.

Who Gets the Most Excited About Holidays? After having been locked away in CIA holding for so long Dirk never got to properly celebrate any holidays. Now whenever a holiday is coming around he and Todd buy every decoration offered for that Holiday and string them up all over the apartment. Dirk will also cut Heart shapes for Valentine’s day, Snowflakes for Christmas, and Bats for Halloween. 

Who is the Big Spoon/Little Spoon? Todd is the big spoon, Dirk curls up on his side and leans against Todd’s chest while Todd wraps his arms securely around his detective and listens to his breathing. 

Who Gets Most Competitive When Playing Games and or Sports? Both. One time they played a six hour game of Monopoly that ended with Todd throwing the board off the table and Dirk screaming his was the king and throwing the fake money at Todd. 

Who Starts the Most Arguments? Todd for sure. He has a lot of doubts about everything and it does occasionally frustrate Dirk. 

Who Suggest that they Buy a Pet? Well Dirk already has the shark kitten which does make Todd nervous as it can rip people literally in half but when the little guy is snoozing in Todd’s lap in the morning he decides that there is no pet better than Dirk’s and his cat.

What TV Shows do they Watch? Dirk is a huge Criminal Minds fan. He likes to judge the characters for needing to find clues and pretends he wasn’t totally surprised by that twist ending!! Todd will watch BoJack Horseman or It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. He likes his cynical humor okay. 

What Other Couples do they Hang Out With? Farah/Amanda, Amanda/The Rowdy 3, Amanda/Martin, Bart/Ken. There’s a lot they could be potentially hanging out with tbqh. 

How Do They Spend Time Together as a Couple? There’s a lot of snuggling at first. Dirk likes to go on long car drives and explore Seattle and Todd tries not to faint during his lovers hectic driving. They’ll solve new cases and eat a home cooked dinner together almost every night. 

Who Made the First Move? Dirk. After realizing Todd would be forever oblivious to his rather blatant flirting tactics, he finally made his first real move in the jeep when they were both exhausted from digging for Mr. Spring’s machine. Todd was leaning back in the passenger seat his eyes studying the stars above because in the city you barely got to see the night sky this clearly. His hands were folded across his chest and that’s when Dirk had the greatest idea. He slowly trailed his own hand across the small space between him and his assistant before lightly sliding it up Todd’s wrist, by now earning the heart fluttering attention of Todd who had unfolded his arms and held it limply out for Dirk to easily interlace their fingers in silent hand holding. They didn’t talk about it, but Todd and Dirk both clearly could feel the romantic tension suffocating them for the remainder of the night. 

Who Brings Flowers Home? Dirk see’s all these pretty bouquets of flowers at a flower stand in the park one day and decides to buy the whole cart of plants without a second thought. Todd’s tiny apartment is now flourishing with strong scented flowers and Todd admittedly did find it a nice surprise when he pushed open the door to find Dirk watering a load of flowers in his apartment. 

Who is the Best Cook? Todd. Todd can cook anything,he learned the skill in college when he had about three different room-mates who also couldn’t fend for themselves, someone had to learn the trait and Todd decided to pick it up. One day after taste testing Dirk’s bowl of brown mush that Dirk swore was supposed to be coca puffs and oatmeal mixed together, Todd teaches Dirk how to make some basic meals. When he tries to teach Dirk how to make bread, they both get covered in flour and have a mini spice war. Their kitchen as well as each other are covered in different spices, but they’re both laughing on the kitchen floor having a real swell time despite the mess. 

2

two birds with one stone ill answer both

lets see… in all honesty not much changes between them, yan-kun would still be a creepy lonely kid and senpai would still be a well intentioned sweetheart. I’ll make a few that apply to both versions

  • Yan-kun would probably be in a ton of sports clubs but never be too good in any of them, is always the last one to be chosen when captains are picking teams
  • since Yk is kinda lanky, parents made him partake in basketball, was ok at it but never wanted to continue on
  • Used to catch worms in elementary and lay them on hot side walks
  • Dad has some fishing roots, tries to teach yk how to fish and gut
  • Owns a lot of jeans and second hand leather jackets
  • Insomiac, usually tries to go to bed early but if not then just likes heading outside for a bit, maybe bike around the neighbourhood.

Now some more for Senpai~

  • really oblivious, takes forever for them to get a clue
  • Not super good with technology, needs help figuring out how to work computers,phones etc..
  • Loves watching light hearted cartoons
  • Would make a wordpress blog and update it with small things like “just had lunch at this cafe!” “Going to the store to buy some soil”
  • Makes a lot of lists all the time, also when more adjusted to technology, would make a lot of playlists 
  • Laughs a ton at old memes, like those ones you see your mom sharing or animal themed ones
  • Only game ever played is minecraft

So there you go! 

anonymous asked:

omo could you please do dating taehyung ;;-;; i'll be eternally grateful

of course you can boo!! no need to be grateful

Originally posted by bangtangirl-cutennes-v

Dating TaeBae

  • taebae
  • small child
  • he wouldn’t actually be aware of his own feelings for a bit i think
  • like all the other boys can tell he’s totally smitten with you but he is oblivious to the fact like he doesn’t know at all
  • and seokjin and hoseok are trying to help by dropping some hints like “hey buddy,, don’t you wish you could like,, kiss their face whenever you want,,”
  • and taehyung just smiles all wide like “um yah that sounds good! i love when you’re that close to your friends!!”
  • and you just hear yoongi screaming in the background
  • and it goes on like this for a while where tae says some not friend like things about you like “man man wouldn’t it be nice to wake up to her face every morning?? man i would die”
  • or “god that is a nice ass butt where do i sign up for some of that”
  • and the boys are tired of him being oblivious af
  • so they devise a plan and they bribe jin with food to go and ask you out
  • and tae finds out and he loses it he flips completely out because wait no she’s not allowed to like anyonE ELSE WHAT IS THIS
  • and so he like physically pushes jin over //gets his butt whooped for it later” and appears in front of you all out of breath and red in the face
  • and he looks so so stressed and you’re kinda worried like “um tae you doing okay you look like you might explode??”
  • and the other boys have gathered to watch this go down bcuz finally the otp is gonna get together alright jeongguk you owe me twenty bucks
  • and tae is just “yes i am going to explode hOW DID YOU KNOW???”
  • and you kinda laugh and you’re blushing cause you’ve liked this oblivious child forever now
  • and he smiles that cute boxy smile and he puts his hand on the back of his neck cause oh wow he probably should’ve planned this??
  • but he just goes for it “well you see i’m gonna explode cause i’ve liked you forever now and i’m so sorry it took me so long to realize it i’m sorry that it took jin hyung asking you out for me to realize i like you more than a friend here how about a date for me to make it up for you?”
  • and you nod and hug him and he hugs back so tight and he probably spins you around too and the other boys are all clapping and cheering (except jin who is still bitter tae pushed him and namjoon has to buy him some ice cream to cheer him up)
  • and the first date is to go see a play
  • tae acts and i think he would want to show you kinda of the stuff he is involved in and it’s a dinner theatre and a murder mystery and it’s so!!
  • like you’re both dressed up not like suits and dresses but he has a nice like button down and vest and slacks and you have a cute skirt and blouse and you did your hair up all nice
  • and he’s holding your hand the entire time “just in case you get scared”
  • and he ends up getting more dessert than he’s supposed to and you guys laugh and giggle in the back of the room like five year olds because this is your seventh piece of cake
  • and he takes you home after the date and he seems a little distracted and you’re kinda??
  • and he smiles sheepishly like “can i sleep over? JuST TO MAKE SURE NO MURDERERS COME FOR YOU”
  • and you laugh and usher him inside and he’s so grateful and he won’t let your out of his sight for the rest of your life okay
  • dates with him are never the same
  • like some days it’s going to the local cafe and trying the most obscure drink on the menu you two can find
  • some days he’s like wow guess what i heard about this new trampoline park i get the recommended age is seven to thirteen but that’s only recommended
  • and one time he takes you to a pet cafe and you two just chill on the floor and pet all the doggies and he names them all after you, every single one gets named after you
  • he would love taking you to shows though
  • and his practices!! //if the director doesn’t kick your butt out//
  • he loves when you help him with his lines
  • and just cause acting he’s always dramatic at home
  • like you’re cutting tomatoes for dinner??
  • in burst tae sobbing and clutching his hand to his heart “docTOR CAN YOU SAVE HIM WILL HE LIVE, DON’T TELL ME THE TERRIBLE NEWS DOCTOR”
  • “taehyung do you want your dinner”
  • “well duh I do”
  • and then other times like you’re sitting on the couch for group movie niGHT??
  • and he’s whispering into your ear kinda loudly “dracula is paler up close than any one of us would have imagined. he seems unaware of his surroundings, distracted by the cackling witch to his left. no scientist before has ever gotten this close. should we-”
  • “tae, that’s yoongi and hoseok”
  • “why do you spoil all my fuN”
  • pet names pet names
  • i think he would have a lot of fun with pet names so they would always be changing
  • his faves would be “jagi, pumpkin, donut, babe, princess”
  • probably calls you a lot of random food names and you still dont know why??
  • “PineaPplE timE FOr MoviE NIGhT”
  • okay but you think it’s movie night
  • it’s never movie night
  • it’s anime night
  • haha your butt is gonna be watching like psycho pass or attack on titan or something boyish
  • and one day jeongguk is like yall need to watch future diary that’s like the best anime to watch with your girlfriend
  • you guys don’t invite him over for dinner for like seventeen years
  • skin ship with tae is like a twenty five eight thing
  • he’s always peppering your face with kisses and he likes to miss your mouth on purpose to get you riled up
  • his fave beside lip kissing would be nose kissing!! and kissing the top of your head cause tall and yes
  • and he is always grabbing your butt i mean have you seen how this boy looks at butts he would grabbing yours every five seconds
  • and then yoongi and namjoon would gag and hack and tae would get all embarrassed and shy and bury his face in the crook of your neck
  • in public i think he would be a bit more reserved and not be as touchy cause he doesn’t want to embarrass you or anything
  • he would like to hold hands so he can swing your arms back and forth!!
  • and he would kinda be oblivious when guys hit on you
  • like if some guy was talking to you in a flirty way he probably wouldn’t even notice really he’s too busy being whipped over you
  • but when he realizes he would probably deal with his jealousy head on
  • like he would go up to the guy and kinda “hi Im taehyung!! Don’t know if you realize this lovely person is taken by me, thanks!!”
  • and he’s smiling so it’s kinda unnerving
  • and then he would drag you home so he can have make up snuggles
  • he’s so for snuggling
  • like he always wants to sit on your lap??
  • and you’re kinda tae you’re huge please don’t
  • and so he settles for you sitting on his lap instead
  • and he loves to lay and have his head on your chest boob pillow
  • and that’s usually how you guys end up sleeping
  • like his head on your chest and he’s curled up in a ball and he look so so precious
  • but sometimes he’s like spooning okay and he’s the big spoon
  • he likes his face in the crook of your neck too he likes being that close to you
  • and he would probably like to stay up until like two in the morning theorizing with you
  • “what if armin isn’t dead though maybe that was his evil twin legout”
  • “pretty sure armin is dead babe”
  • but then he would like to talk about your future together too
  • “how many dogs are we gonna have when we’re married huh?”
  • you guys basically run a farm up in your apartment
  • like there’s six dogs
  • and seventeen fish (four didn’t make it long though)
  • and two cats
  • and taehyung comes home from practice one day and he’s hiding his back from you and you hey babe??
  • and behold he is holding a baby kitten and you’re about to unload but he uses the pout and the puppy eyes
  • and that is how leo joined the family
  • although tae is really kinda childish sometimes and bright and innocent he would easily tell when you’re upset
  • and he would listen to you first before trying to solve anything right away
  • and then he would make you some hot chocolate//tea whatever you like and sit down with you and try to talk you through the issue
  • he’s a lot more insightful than people want to believe
  • and he doesn’t really seem like the super clingy type but when they’re away that all changes like he calls you every single time he gets a break and makes sure you’re eating and sleeping enough
  • he’s always showing you off to his family too like “pumpkin pose my grandma wants an updated picture of you thankS”
  • he would introduce you to the family right off the back
  • and they all love you and ask when the wedding is gonna be and tae is like um once im old enough so maybe like next year!
  • and you kinDA WHAT
  • he wouldn’t rush you into anything though he’s so respectful and precious
  • and we ignore the leash incident on this post to keep things calm cool and collected
  • like you’re his number one priority and he spoils you so much
  • like always buying you things
  • like hey i bought you some cupcakes on the way home
  • here’s that new cellphONE  CASE NOW WE CAN MATCH
  • and you’re like boy save your money rigHT nOW
  • you have matching shirts and sweatshirts and phone cases and bracelets and one day he’s like tattOOS and you just shut that one down right then and there
  • but he’s so precious protect him and love him thanks

anonymous asked:

What's the weirdest piece of French history you know?

So you guys know about the French Revolution.
It was a time of upheaval and generally the people back then didn’t care much about conventions in general and the royal family in particular, so in the winter of 1793 the government in place decided to unearth all the kings and queens and suchlike buried in St-Denis and use their lead sarcophagus to make bullets. Because fuck history, note that we also lost a lot of religious buildings in that time.
So they unearth the kings, they dump their remains in pits - one for kings, one for queens and one for the other lot - and suddenly they come across Henry IV, and boy ain’t he the prettiest corpse in the yard.
His body was apparently so well preserved that they decided it would be nice to simply leave it for people to see, for the banter.

Comes a grenadier.
The guy sees Henry IV, more specifically his whiskers.
And he goes “WITH A MOUSTACHE LIKE THAT YOU CAN LIVE FOREVER” oblivious to the fact that said moustache was currently the property of a 183 years old cadaver.
And he just fucking takes it and leaves.

That’s the story of how some soldier just straight up stole Henry IV’s moustache during the French Revolution.

Rumors

There’s nothing like a good rumor to get Helios buzzing. Rhys just wishes it didn’t involve him.

A quick thing that came to mind. Throws hands up. Don’t expect great characterisation in this.

Ao3


The Hub of Heroism was alive with activity when Rhys walked in, taking a spot at one of the tables to sip his morning coffee, not yet awake. If he had been, he might have noticed all of the subtle and not-so-subtle stares at was getting. As it was, all he had eyes for was the caffeine goodness clutched tightly in his left hand.

That was probably his biggest mistake, really. You didn’t get far in Hyperion if you didn’t pay attention.

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