o.d.s

Smoking has been so glamorous for so long, all those matches, those pauses, the lipstick on the tips–the smoke itself curling its casual way through the most nerve-wracking moments. But in another way, smoking, although glamorous, has never been as glamorous as heroin–and dying from cigarettes just doesn’t have the tragic sunset quality that O.D.ing lends to death. Heroin is the celebrated romantic excess of our time.
—  Eve Babitz, Slow Days, Fast Company

Calls other units get: shootings/GSWs, O.D.s, CPR in progress, real badass shit.

Calls I get: nose bleeds, dental pain, old ladies that just want someone to talk to and for some reason think calling 911 and making up fake injuries is appropriate.

on the sherlock special?

well, that didn’t clear up/answer anything. except, y’know. ev e ry thing??? (i’m sorry i’m still very confused but excited???)

I’m just going to assume that 98% of that is a huge hallucination, meaning that, we perceive the world strictly from Sherlock’s view. John and Mary’s situation? The influence Moriarty currently has over Sherlock’s mind? Sherlock’s constant battle between humanization (”You keep me right, John Watson… It’s always you.”) and being the sociopath he wants to be (”I am you! … I’ll burn the heart right out of you.”)? All there. I would only consider the bit near the end on the jet, before Sherlock leaves to baker street, and near the beginning where Sherlock admits to overdosing, to be canon. And even then - maybe not?? (I do love this episode. I really do.) 

speaking of overdosing, something a lot of people keep pointing out; I really want to know when/how he got ahold of those drugs.

Was he high while speaking to john? I want to say this is unlikely (”He didn’t seem high”). I also want to bring attention to how angry john was at sherlock (and hurt?? wow) to the point where I was almost surprised. I’d be upset, too, if my best friend endangered himself (fucking agaiN???) and invalidated his own goodbye/almost-admission-of-love by being under the influence.

Did he only think to drug himself himself after he got on the jet? Probably? I’d say so. I mean, sure, if we’re putting on our johnlock glasses - holy shit!! he’s O.D.ing because he’ll never see john again!! he’d rather die than leave jawn!!! - but there’s also the fact that he has about 6 months to live, as predicted by his, possibly dying, uncaring brother. On top of that, his best friend (and probable love interest) is left with an untrustworthy woman, their unborn child(!???!), and Sherlock likely views himself as the only one to blame. So, yeah, he’ll read Jawn’s shitty blog and mope. Can you blame him? (I mean, I love Johnlock, but saying it’s only about John seems a little unfair.)

Sherlock still reading John’s blog after finding out about Moriarty’s “resurrection” turns into a more… “This is what I sacrificed for Moriarty’s death. And it was all for nothing.” Or, maybe he’s considering, “If Moriarty is still alive, how extensive is his network? How far back does our connection go?” Maybe he’s reading those ‘anonymous’ comments, or those from ‘theimprobableone’ and he’s connecting the dots.

Then, of course, I have to wonder about Mycroft. It’s clear he’ll die in two years (As Victorian Sherlock predicts… repeatedly, or, perhaps, Sherlock’s subconscious just simply worried). And Mycroft… might know his own time is limited?

  • He’s being increasingly tender towards Sherlock, which doesn’t fit their brotherly rivalry. Him telling sherlock how he’s always been there, etc.(I have no doubt Mycroft really does care, but he’s better versed in the art of tough love. Why change it now? Though, the last Christmas before the whole CAM ordeal, and we see Mycroft still acting out of character.)
  • He tells John to take care of Sherlock… to either mean “After I’m gone…”, or, “Take better care of him” (As John has the ability to make or break Sherlock, said by Mycroft himself is S1)
  • Mary (who many speculate is connected with Moriarty somehow, after having been in the CIA and then done ‘freelance’. And there’s her disappearance, which has Napoleon of Crime written all over it. Of course, no one ever gets out of Moriarty’s employment and debt, you know. She’s a perfect pawn to burn John’s, and then Sherlock’s, heart out.) keeps interrupting Mycroft, showing him up, and illustrating his fall from power = Power shift from Mycroft towards Moriarty.

And there’s everything else the episode tells us about Sherlock, simply because it’s all from Sherlock’s point of view. Consider it a fanfiction written by yours truly. Quite meta, isn’t it? (”Stop shoving everything up it’s own ass!”)

  • Generally, modern-day scenes in the mind palace seem to = Sherlock’s perception of reality, and the Victorian era is closer to how things were/should be, though all of it is really a fantasy.
  • Sherlock’s finally addressing his own ingrained misogynistic views: Underestimating Mary (“If you take another step, I’ll shoot you” “No, Mrs. Watson, you won’t.”) How horribly he treated Molly Hooper. His usage and cruelty towards Janine (which she arguably knew about and instead, I believe, was using Sherlock). And Sherlock brushing dear Hudders aside as a mere plot device. Maybe this will change?
  • His self-loathing, or, at least, confusion with himself is reviewed. But really, Victorian!Watson is basically prodding him into a conversation about sexuality, one they’ve had before (”You know more about women than I, Watson”) and Sherlock shuts it down. Again. Maybe repression acts as a safety for him? Or he views himself as an obstacle? Either way, we know this is still a big question for Sherlock - he cares.
  • The idea that he is explicitly aiming to be what John expects/a sociopath is also highlighted at least twice (”Love is just a crack in the lens..” ”No, those were my words… I know you’re a human”)
  • We see Victorian!Mary and Sherlock deduces that her husband has been stolen by another. (Himself. Hah.)
  • Then seeing Sherlock’s version of reality (digging up a grave? er, just go with it. at least it’s modern-era) where John readily gets sick of Sherlock and leaves with Mary.
  • As a ‘replacement’ for John (like Molly temporarily was), Lestrade enters the picture to help Sherlock dig up the grave. Lestrade is the only one helping = Lestrade is Sherlock’s last reliable link.
  • And this is only after John leaves with Mary - I’d say Sherlock saw himself losing John to Mary, and was worried about this. And with the “Quip Rule” (anything that makes the audience laugh has a deeper meaning), “I’m taking Mary home”/”Mary’s taking me home”, we know it probably holds importance. 
  • Sherlock is completely aware of John’s jealousy towards Irene Adler. And has been, for a long time. (And he’s still bothered by it!)

and of course,“It’s never twins.” Maybe we can actually take something at face value for once. I doubt it, though.