now with that being said bye guys

history of the entire world, i guess; a transcript

hi. you’re on a rock, floating in space. pretty cool, huh? some of it’s water. fuck it, actually most of it’s water. i can’t even get from here to there without buying a boat. it’s sad. i’m sad. i miss you. how did this happen? a long time ago, actually never, and also now, nothing is nowhere. when? never. makes sense, right? like i said, it didn’t happen. nothing was never anywhere. that’s why its been everywhere. it’s been so everywhere, you don’t need a “where”. you don’t even need a “when”. that’s how “every” it gets. (pause). forget this. i wanna be something, go somewhere, do something. i want things to change. i want to invent time and space. and i know it’s possible because everything is here and it probably already happened. i just don’t know when to start. and that’s exactly where it started. (background noise) woah. i… paused it. i think there’s a universe now. what’s it made of? quarks and stuff. ah, that’s a thing, in a place. don’t like it? try a new place, at a different Time™. try to stick together because the world is gonna get bigger and emptier. but it’s not empty yet. it’s still very full, and about a kjghpillion degrees. (about no seconds later). great news! the quarks are now happily married in groups of three called a “proton” or a “neutron”. and there’s something else flying around too that wants to join in but can’t cause it’s still to (HOT). (about ten minutes later). great news! the protons and the neutrons are now happily married to each other (some of them even doubled up). (about 380,000 years later). great news, the electrons have now joined in. congratulations, the world is now a bunch of gas in space. but it’s getting closer together and it’s getting closer together and it’s getting closer together. it’s a staaaar. new shit just got made. some stars burn out and die. bigger stars burn out and die with passion! and make some brand new way crazier shit. space dust! which allows newer, more interesting stars to be made, and then die, and explode into even crazier space dust. so now stars have cool stuff around them, like rocks, ice, and funny clouds, which can make some very interesting things. like this ball of flaming rocks, for example. holy shit, we just got hit with another ball of flaming rocks, and it kinda made a mess. which is now the moon. weather update: it’s raining rocks from outer space. weather update: those rocks might’ve had water inside them and now there’s Hot Steam in the sky. weather update: cooler temperatures today, and the floor is no longer lava. weather update: its raining. severe flooding alert: the entire world is now an ocean. volcano alert: that’s land. there’slifeintheocean. what? something’s alive in the ocean. oh cool, like a plant or an animal? no. a microscopic speck! it lives at the bottom of the ocean and eats chemical soup which is being served hot and fresh made from gnarly space ingredients leftover from when it was raining rocks or whatever. oh yeah, and it can do that. it has secret instructions written inside itself telling it how to build another one of itself. so that’s pretty nifty, i would say. tired of living at the bottom of the ocean? now you can eat sunlight. using a revolutionary technique you can convert sunlight into food. taste the sun. side effect: now there’s oxygen everywhere and the sky’s blue. then the earth might’ve been a snowball for a while, maybe even a coupla times. it’s a sponge, it’s a plant, it’s a worm and some other types of weird strange water bugs and strange fish. it’s the Cambrian explosion. “wow, that’s animals and stuff.” but we’re still in the ocean. hey, can we go on land? NoO. why? the sun is a deadly lazer. oh okay. not anymore there’s a blanket. now the animals can go on land. come on, animals, let’s go on land! “nope, can’t walk yet. and there’s no food yet so i don’t care.” (100 million years later) ok, will you learn to walk if there’s plants up here? “maybe,” said some bugs, and fish. “uh. uh. uh.” (five million years later) “ok so i can go on land but i have to go back in the water to have babies.” (idea) learn to use an egg. “i was already doing that.” use a stronger egg, and put water in it, have a baby, on land, in an egg. water is in the egg, baby, in the water, in the egg. works for me. bye bye ocean. aaand now everything is huge. including bugs. wanna see a map of the land? sure. ah fuck, now everything’s dead. just kidding here are the survivors. keep your eye on this one because its about to become the dinosaurs. here’s another map of the land. yeah, it broke apart, don’t worry about it, it does that all the time. here comes a meteor. and the dinosaurs are gone. its mammal time! here come the mammals. look at those breasts. now they’re gonna dominate the world, and one of them just learned how to grab stuff. and walk. no, like, walk like ‘that’. and grab stuff at the same time. and bang rocks together to make… pointed rocks. “ouch.” and set things on fire. “yeouch.” and make crazy sounds with their voice (“gneurshk.”) which can mean different things. that’s a human person. and now they’re everywhere, almost. ice age. what? you can walk over here? cool. not anymore. i guess we’re stuck here now.

let’s review. there’s people on the planet. and they’re chasing their food. fuck it, time to plant some grass. look at this, i control the food now. now everyone will want to be my friend and live near me. let’s all build houses except mine is bigger because i own the food. this is great, i wonder if anyone else is doing this. tired of using rocks for everything? use metal. it’s underground. better farming was just invented in a sweet dank valley right in between these two rivers, and the animals are helping. guess what happens next. more food, and more people who came to buy the food. now you need people to help make the food and keep track of the sales. and now you need houses for people to live in, and people to make the houses. and now there’s more people and they invent things, which makes things better and more people come. and there’s more farming and more people to make more things for more people. and now there’s business, money, writing, laws, power. sociiiety. coming soon to a dank river valley near you. meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, the horse is probably being tamed. why is all my metal so lame and lumpy? tired of using lame, sad metal? introducing bronze, made with special ingredient tin from the far lands of tin land. i don’t know, my dealer won’t tell me where he gets it. also, guess what - egypt. meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, they figured out how to put wheels on a horse. now we’re getting somewhere. also, china. and did i mention indusrivervalleycivilization. norte chico. the middle east is getting more complicated, maybe because it’s in the middle of the east. knock knock- er, clop clop, it’s the people with the horses? and they made an empire! and then everyone else copied their horses. greeks! ah look, it must be the greeks, or a beta version of the greeks. let’s check in with the indus river valley civilization. they’re gone. guess who’s not gone? china. new arrivals in india. maybe it’s thosehorsepeopleiwastalkingabout or theircousinsorsomething. and they wrote some hymns and mantras and stuff. you could make a religion out of this. there’s the bronze age collapse. now the phoenicians can get down to business. also, can we switch to a metal that’s a little easier to find? thanks. look who came back to israel, it’s the twelve tribes of israel. and they believe in god. just one though, he’s got like a ten step program. here’s some huge heads, must be the olmec. the phoenicians make some colonies. the greeks copy their idea and make some colonies. the phoenicians made a colony so big it makes colonies. here comes the assyrian empire. nevermind it’s the babylonian- median- it’s the persian empire. “wow, that’s big.” ah, the buddha was just enlightened! who’s the buddha? this guy, who sat under a tree for so long that he figured out how to ignore the fact that we’re all dying. you could make a religion out of this. oops, china just broke, but while it was breaking confucius was figuring out how to have good morals. ah, the greeks just had the idea of thinking about stuff. and right over here, alexander just had the idea of conquering the entire persian empire. it’s a great idea, he was…great. and now he’s dead. hopefully, the rest of the gang will be able to share the empire evenly between them. knock knock, it’s chandragupta, he says, “get the hell out of here, will you get the hell out of here if i give you 500 elephants? ok thanks bye; time to conquer all of india- or most of india”. but what about this part? that’s the tamil kings, no one conquers the tamil kings. who are the tamil kings? merchants, probably. and they’ve got spices. who would like to buy the spices? “me,” said the arabians, swiftly buying them and selling them to the rest of the world. hey, china put itself back together again with good morals as their main philosophy. actually they have three main philosophies. out here, the horse nomads run wild and free, and they would like to ransack your city. let’s check the greekification levels of the greekified kingdoms: greekification overload! “bye,” said the parthians, “bye,” said the jews. “hi,” said the parthians, taking over the entire place. “heyyyyyyyy,” said the romans, eating the entire mediterranean for breakfast. “thanks for invading our homeland,” said the jews, who were starting to get tired of people invading their homeland. “hi, everything’s great,” said some guy who seems to be getting very popular, and then gets arrested and killed for being too popular, which only makes him more popular. you could make a religion out of this. want silk? now you can buy it from china! they just made a brand new road to the world…or you can get there on water. “sick, new trade routes,” said india, accidentally spreading their religion to the entire southeast. hmm, that’s a good place for an epic trading kingdom. there goes buddhism, travelling up the silk road. i wonder if it’ll reach china before it collapses again. “remember the persian empire? yup,” said the persians, making a new one. axum is getting so powerful they would like to build a long stick. has anyone populated madagascar yet? let’s do it together. china is whole again…then it broke again. still can’t cross the sahara desert? try camels. “hell yeah, now we’ve got business,” said the ghana empire, selling lots of gold, and slaves. “hi i live in the roman empire and i was wondering, is loving jesus legal yet?” “no” “actually ok sure,” said constantine, moving the capitol way over here to be closer to his main rival. don’t worry about rome, it won’t fall. it’s the golden age of india. there’s the gupta empire. not chandragupta, just gupta, first name chandra, the first. guess who’s in rome? barbarians. what’s a barbarian? “non-romans,” said the romans, being invaded by non-romans. r.i.p. roman empire. or actually, just half is just fine. but it’s not in rome anymore so let’s give it a new name. the mayans have figured out the staaars. oh, and here’s a huge city, population everyone. the göktürks have taken over the entire eurasian steppe. great job, göktürks. how’s india? broken. how’s china? back together. how’s those trading kingdoms? bigger, and there’s more of them. korea has three kingdoms. japan has a kingdom, it’s the sunrise kingdom.

deep in the arabian desert, on the top of a mountain, the real god whispers in muhammad’s ear, so he goes down to the cube where everyone worships gods, and he tells them their gods are all fake. and everyone got so mad at him that he had to leave town and go to a different town. you could make a religion out of this. and maybe conquer the world as well. the roman empire is long gone, but somehow the pope is still the pope. plus there’s new kingdoms all over europe. i wonder if there’s room for moors. here’s all the wisdom, in a house. it’s the baghdad house of wisdom, just in time for the islamic golden age. “let’s bring stuff to the coast and sell it, and become the swahili on the swahili coast,” said the swahili on the swahili coast. remember this tiny space you have to go through to get from here to there? someone owns that now. wanna get enlightened in the middle of nowhere? the franks have the biggest kingdom in europe, and the pope is so proud that he invites the king over for christmas. “surprise, you’re the new roman emperor,” said the pope, pretending to still be part of the roman empire. then the franks broke their kingdom into what will later be called france and not france. the northerners, or just norse if you don’t have that much time, are exploring. they go north, from the north to the northern north, and they find some land. two types of land, and they name them accordingly. they also invade some other places and get called many names, such as vikings. there’s the rus, the kievan rus. are they vikings? “i don’t think so,” said the kievan rus. ok, fair enough. the pope is ready to make some more emperors of the roman empire, the holy roman empire. it’s actually germany but don’t worry about it. new kingdoms! christianizeallthekingdoms. which brand would you like? “mine’s better,” “mine’s better,” “mine’s better”. “time to conquer england,” said william. it’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s the seljuk turks. “ahh!” said the byzantine empire, who’s getting so small it almost doesn’t exist anymore, “we need help!” they need help, so they call the pope. “hey pope, can you help us get rid of the seljuks? maybe take back the holy land on the way? come on, i know you wanna take back the holy land.” “yes, i do actually want to do that. let’s do a crusade.” crusade. they did many crusades, some of which almost didn’t fail, but at least the italians got some sweet trade deals. goodbye mayans. hello toltecs, goodbye toltecs, hello mississippi. look at those mounds. there’s the pueblo. i always wondered how to build a town in a cliff. guess who’s here? khmer. where? here, and pagan is there, and vietnam unconquered itself, korea just became itself, and japan is so addicted to art that the military might have to take over the government. china just invented bombs, and typing. and the mongols just invaded most of the universe. nice going, genghis. i bet that will last a long time! some of the islamic turks were unaffected by the mongol invasions because they were busy invading india. is it tonga time? i think it’s tonga time. i just found out where the swahili gets all their gold. look at this chad (means lake), there’s an empire there, right in the middle of africa. the king of mali is so rich he’s going on tour to let everyone know. “wow, that guy’s rich,” everyone said. the christians are doing a great job of conquering iberia which will soon be called spain and not spain. please remain christian. we will check in later to see if you are still christian when you least expect. whoops, half of europe just died. ming. china’s back, yay. hey khmer, time to share, new kingdoms here and there. oh look who controls all the islands, its the mahajapit. majahapit, mapajahit, mahapajit, mapajahit, majapahit? oh, italy’s really rich, time for them to care a lot about art and the ancient classics. it’s kinda like a rebirth. here’s a printer, lets make books. so you think you can conquer the byzantine empire? “yep,” said the ottoman turks. nice job, ottoman turks. whoops, you missed a spot; don’t forget to ban europe from the indian spice trade. “what? that’s bullshit,” said portugal, spiceless. well i guess we’ll have to find another way to india. “wait,” said christopher colombus, probably smoking crack, “if the world is round, lets go this way to india!” “nah, don’t worry we already got this,” said portugal. so chris goes to spain. “hey spain, wanna hire me to go find india by going around back of the world?”  “no.”  “please?”  “no.”  “please?”  “no.” “please?” “ok.” so he sails into the ocean, and discovers more ocean, and then discovers ‘the indies’ and ‘japan’. let’s draw a line to decide who gets which half of the world. the aztec and inca empires are off to a great start. i wonder if they know that europe just discovered their continent. the habsburgs are marrying into so many royal families they might have to start marrying each other. move over lithuania, here comes moscow. ivan wants to make russia great again. move over timurids, maybe go invade india or something. persia just made persia persian again. let’s make it the other kind of islam, the one where we thought the first guy should’ve been the other guy. hey christians, do you sin? now you can buy your way out of hell. “that’s bullshit, this whole thing is bullshit, that’s a scam, fuck the church, here’s 95 reasons why,” said martin luther, in his book which might have accidentally started the protestant reformation. “you know what would be magnificent?” said suleiman, wearing an onion hat, “what if the ottoman empire was really big, which it is now.”  “what if russia was big,” said ivan, trying not to be terrible. portugal had a dream that they controlled the entire indian ocean, including the spice trade, and then that dream was real. and spain realised that this is not india, but they pillaged it anyway. “damn,” said england and france, “we gotta start pillaging some stuff.” then the dutch revolt and all the hipsters move to amsterdam. “damn,” said amsterdam, “we gotta start pillaging some stuff.” question one: can you get to india through north america? no, but at least there’s beaver. question two: steal the spice trade. that’s not a question but the dutch did it anyway. sugar. guess where all the sugar’s made? in brazil. stolen! in the carribean, and it’s so goddamn profitable you might forget to not do slavery. the next thing on russia’s to-do list is to get bigger. britain and france are having a friendly discussion about who should control the entire world, more specifically, ohio. then it escalates into a seven year discussion, giving prussia a chance to show austria who’s boss. but what about britain and france, did they figure out who’s boss? yes they did, it’s britain. guess who’s broke? also britain. so they start taxing the hell out of america.

“fuck you,” says america, declaring their independence, and fighting for it. france helps them win, now france is broke. and britain will have to send their prisoners to a different continent. wait if france is broke, why do the king and queen still wear such fancy dresses? “let’s overthrow the palace and cut all their heads off!” said robespierre, cutting everybody’s head off until someone eventually got mad and cut his head off. you could make a reli- no don’t. haiti is starting to like the idea of a revolution, especially the slaves, who free themselves by killing their masters. “why didn’t we think of this before?” wait, who’s in charge of france now? “me,” said napoleon, trying to take over europe. luckily, they banished him to an island. but he came back. luckily, they banished him to another island. there goes latin america, becoming independent in the latin america wars of independence. britain just figured out how to turn steam into power, so now they can make many different types of machines and factories with machines in them so they can make a lot of products real fast. then they invent some trains, and conquer india and maybe put some trains there. “hey china,” said britain, “buy stuff from us.” “nah, dude we already got everything,” says china. so britain tried to get them addicted to opium, which worked actually, but then china made it illegal and dumped it all into the sea. so britain threw a hissy-fit and made them open up five cities and give them an island. britain and russia are playing a game where they try to stop each other from conquering afganistan. also the sultan of oman lives in zanzibar now, that’s just where he lives. india had a revolution, and they would like to govern themselves now. “nope,” said britain, governing them even harder than before. technology is about to go crazy. the united states finally figured out whether slavery is good or bad. “it’s bad,” they decided. and then they continued manifesting their destiny, which is to kill the rest of the natives and take their land, and maybe kick out the mexicans too. “i know, let’s rape africa,” said europe, scrambling to see who could rape it the fastest. they never got ethiopia.  britain and france are still hungry. they never got thailand. the united states ran out of destiny to manifest, so they’re looking for more. hawaii. cuba. wait spain controls cuba. “well, blame something on them and go to war! what should we blame on them? let’s blame the maine on spain!” so they blame the maine on spain. now we’re in business. to celebrate, they kick panama out of panama and make a canal, connecting the two oceans. britain just found oil in the middle east. it makes cars go. china is so tired of being bossed around that they delete their old government and make a new stronger government, which is accidentally weaker and controlled by a guy from the previous government. europe hasn’t had a war since the last war, so they start world war one. look at those guns. it’s gonna be a great war, so great we won’t need a second one. after it’s over, they blame germany. russia went on strike and the workers overthrew the government. now everyone’s paycheck is the same. communism, in the soviet union. the arabs revolt, and britain helps. now the ottoman empire is gone, so we can give the jewish people a place to live. hopefully the arabs won’t mind. “let’s cut the cake,” said sykes and picot, carving up the remains of the not-so-ottoman-anymore empire. except turkey, turkey makes a brand new turkey. and then the saudis conquer arabia. it just seemed like the right thing to do. hello? yes, it’s the 1920s calling. let’s get in a car and drive to a party and listen to the jazz on the radio and go to the movies. the economy’s great and it’ll probably be great forever. just kidding. germany’s back, featuring hitler, the angry mustache model. he’s mad at the jews for existing. japan is finally conquering the east, and they’re so excited they rape nanking way too hard. they should probably just deny it. hitler’s out of control, so the international community tackles him and tries to explain to him why killing all the jews is a bad idea, but he kills himself before they could explain it to him. that’s world war two. bonus round: pacific showdown, united states versus japan. fight! finish him. let’s unite all the nations and have some world peace. seems legit. “hi i’m gandhi and if britain doesn’t get the hell out of india i’m going to starve myself in public. wow, that worked?” bonus: now there’s pakistan. actually two pakistans. one of them can be bangladesh later. the jews and the arabs finally figured out which one of them should live in the holy land. “me”, they both said at the same time. “let’s divide up the land so everyone’s happy.” sike! they both get angrier. look out china, there’s a new china in china. what’s on the menu? communism! “no thanks,” said the other china, escaping to an island. i wonder which one is the real china. there’s the korean war, korea versus korea, nobody wins, then it’s on pause forever. let’s meet the sponsors. oh, it’s the two global superpowers. they’re having a friendly debate over which economic system is good and which is an evil virus of satan. and they both have atom bombs. fight! wait no that would be the end of the world. let’s just keep it cool and spy on each other instead. and make sure we have enough atom bombs. “i’ll race you to space. now let’s make some more countries fight themselves.” europe is tired of pillaging other continents, so the continents they were pillaging are tired of being pillaged. so here’s a new map, with new countries. now you can’t tell who they’re being pillaged by. the united states finally decided whether racism is good or bad. they decided it’s bad, and the world agrees. south africa might need another minute to think about it. let’s check the world population. woah. okay. technology’s better too, that might keep happening. the soviet union decides to relax a little and accidentally falls apart. europe makes a union, so now they can all use the same money; except britain because they don’t feel like it. let’s check the mail. surprise! it’s on the computer! whoops, someone just attacked america, i bet they’ll remember that. phone call, surprise, it’s in your pocket! wanna learn everything? surprise, it’s on the computer! now your phone’s a computer, which is in your pocket. whoops, the economy just crashed. don’t worry, the big banks won’t fail, because they’re not supposed to. surprise, flying robots! with bombs. wanna print a brain? some people have no friends. some people have no food. the globe is warming, and the ocean is full of plastic. “let’s save the planet,” said everybody, not knowing how. “let’s invent a thing inventor,” said the thing inventor inventor, after being invented by a thing inventor. that’s pretty cool. by the way, where the hell are we?

Protective Or Possessive - Part Three | Jughead x Reader

Originally posted by kulo-ren


Pairing: Jughead x Reader

Description: Sticking with your friend Veronica’s plan, you head to Pop’s to confront Jug and it becomes a whirlwind of emotions between the two of you.

Warnings: none.

Word count: 1,763

A/N: the support for this has been incredible and i really hope you enjoy this! so many of you asked for a part three and i hope this lives up to the expectations <3

PART ONE | PART TWO


“He hates me,” you sighed, flopping down onto your bed with your phone pressed to your ear. The moment you’d got home you’d called Veronica since she was the mastermind behind this whole thing. You’d told her his reaction and how horrible you felt that you’d upset him so much. Part of you wanted to go and come clean to Jug but when you’d voiced this to Ronnie, she’d shut it down instantly. The plan was in motion and there was no stopping it.

“He doesn’t hate you, (Y/N). Stop being such a drama queen.” Although you couldn’t see her, you knew that Veronica was rolling her eyes at you right now.

You snorted. “Says the biggest drama queen I know.”

“Shutup. Look, Jughead doesn’t hate you. Our plan kind of worked, right? We got a reaction out of him. Just sit tight for a few hours then show up at Pop’s. I know for a fact he’s not going to be too mad to want to talk to you.”

“I don’t know, V.”

Keep reading

We could make a religion out of this....

hi.

you’re on a rock floating in space.

pretty cool, huh?

some of it’s water.

fuck it, actually most of it’s water.

i can’t even get from here to there without buying a boat.

it’s sad.

i’m sad.

i miss you.

how did this happen?

a long time ago, actually never, and also now, nothing is nowhere.

when?

never.

makes sense, right?

like i said, it didn’t happen.

nothing was never anywhere.

that’s why it’s been everywhere.

it’s been so everywhere you don’t need a where.

you don’t even need a when.

that’s how every it gets.

forget this.

i wanna be something.

go somewhere.

do something.

i want things to change.

i want to invent time and space.

and i know it’s possible because everything is here and it probably already happened.

i just don’t know when to start.

and that’s exactly where it started.

whoah, i paused it.

i think there’s a universe now.

what’s it made of?

quarks & stuff

ah, that’s a thing.

in a place.

don’t like it?

try a new place.

at a different time™.

try to stick together, because the world is gonna get bigger.

and emptier.

but it’s not empty yet.

it’s still very full, and about a kjghpillion degrees.

great news!

the quarks are now happily married, in groups of three called a proton or a neutron

and there’s something else flying around too that wants to join in but can’t cause it’s still too

HOT

great news!

the protons and neutrons are now happily married to each other.

and some of them even doubled up.

great news, the electrons have now joined in

congratulations, the world is now a bunch of gas in space.

but it’s getting closer together.

and it’s getting closer together.

and it’s getting closer toge-

it’s a star

new shit just got made!

some stars burn out and die.

bigger stars burn out and die with passion, and make some brand new, way crazier shit.

space dust

which allows newer, more interesting stars to be made, and then die, and explode into

even crazier space dust

so now stars have cool stuff around them, like rocks, ice, and funny clouds, which can make some very interesting things.

like this ball of flaming rocks for example.

holy shit, we just got hit with another ball of flaming rocks.

and it kind of made a mess.

which is

now the moon

weather update:

it’s raining rocks from outer space.

weather update:

those rocks might have had water inside them, and now there’s hot steam in the sky.

weather update:

cooler temperatures today, and the floor is no longer lava.

weather update:

it’s raining.

severe flooding alert:

the entire world is now an ocean.

volcano alert:

that’s land!

there’slifeintheocean

what?

something’s alive in the ocean

oh cool, like a plant or an animal?

no, a microscopic speck.

it lives at the bottom of the ocean and eats chemical soup, which is being served hot and fresh, made from gnarly space ingredients left over from when it was raining rocks or whatever.

oh yeah, and it can do that.

it has secret instructions written inside itself telling it how to build another one of itself.

so that’s pretty nifty, i would say.

tired of living at the bottom of the ocean?

now you can eat sunlight!

using a revolutionary technique, you can convert sunlight into food

taste the sun

side effect: now there’s oxygen everywhere and the sky’s blue.

then the earth might have been a snowball for a while, maybe even a couple of times.

it’s a sponge.

it’s a plant.

it’s a worm, and some other types of weird strange water bugs and strange fish.

it’s the Cambrian explosion

“wow, that’s animals and stuff”

but we’re still in the ocean, hey, can we go on land?

no

why?

the sun is a deadly lazer

oh okay.

not anymore, there’s a blanket

now the animals can go on land.

come on, animals, let’s go on land!

nope, can’t walk yet.

and there’s no food yet, so i don’t care.

ok, will you learn to walk if there’s plants up here?

maybe, said some bugs, and fish.

ok, so i can go on land, but i have to go back in the water to

have babies

learn to use an egg.

i was already doing that.

use a stronger egg.

put water in it.

have a baby, on land, in an egg.

water is in the egg.

baby, in the egg, in the water, in the egg.

works for me.

bye bye ocean

and now everything’s huge.

including bugs.

wanna see a map of the land?

sure.

oh fuck, now everything’s dead.

just kidding, here are the survivors.

keep your eye on this one because it’s about to become the dinosaurs.

here’s another map of the land.

yeah, it broke apart, don’t worry about it, it does that all the time.

here comes a meteor.

and the dinosaurs are gone

it’s mammal time, here come the mammals.

look at those breasts.

now they’re gonna dominate the world and one of them just learned how to grab stuff.

and walk.

no, like, walk like that.

and grab stuff at the same time.

and bang rocks together to make pointed rocks.

“ouch”

and set things on fire.

“yeouch”

and make crazy sounds with their voice.

“gneurshk”

which can mean different things.

that’s a human person

and now they’re everywhere.

almost.

ice age

what, you can walk over here?

cool.

not anymore

well i guess we’re stuck here now.

let’s review.

there’s people on the planet.

and they’re chasing their food.

fuck it, time to plant some grass.

look at this.

i control the food now.

now everyone will want to be my friend and live near me.

let’s all build houses except mine is bigger because i own the food.

this is great, i wonder if anyone else is doing this.

tired of using rocks for everything?

use metal.

it’s underground.

better farming was just invented, in a sweet dank valley right in between these two rivers.

and the animals are helping.

guess what happens next

more food.

and more people who came to buy the food.

now you need people to help make the food and keep track of the sales.

and now you need houses for people to live in and people to make the houses, and now there’s more people and they invent things, which makes things better and more people come and there’s more farming and more people to make more things for more people and now there’s business, money, writing, laws, power.

Society

coming soon to a dank river valley near you.

meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, the horse is probably being tamed.

why is all my metal so lame and lumpy?

tired of using lame, sad metal?

introducing

Bronze

made with special ingredient tin from the far lands of tin land.

i don’t know, my dealer won’t tell me where he gets it.

also, guess what?

egypt

meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, they figured out how to put wheels on a horse.

now we’re getting somewhere.

also

china

and did i mention

indus river valley civilization

norte chico

the middle east is getting more complicated, maybe because it’s in the middle of the east.

knock knock, er, clop clop.

it’s the people with the horses.

and they made an empire.

and then everyone else copied their horses.

greeks

ah look, it must be the greeks, er, a beta version of the greeks.

let’s check in with the indus river valley civilization.

they’re gone.

guess who’s not gone?

china

new arrivals in india, maybe it’s those horse people i was talking about, or their cousins or something

and they wrote some hymns and mantras and stuff

you could make a religion out of this.

there’s the bronze age collapse.

now the phoenicians can get down to business

also, can we switch to a metal that’s a little easier to find?

thanks.

look who came back to israel, it’s the twelve tribes of israel.

and they believe in God

just 1 though, he’s got like a ten step program.

here’s some huge heads.

must be the olmecs.

the phoenicians make some colonies.

the greeks copy their idea and make some colonies.

the phoenicians made a colony so big it makes colonies.

here comes the assyrian empire.

never mind, it’s the babylonian- median-

it’s the Persian Empire

“wow, that’s big”

ah, the buddha was just enlightened.

who’s the buddha?

this guy, who sat under a tree for so long that he figured out how to ignore the fact that we’re all dying.

you could make a religion out of this.

oops, china just broke, but while it was breaking, confucius was figuring out how to have good morals.

ah, the greeks just had the idea of thinking about stuff.

and right over here, alexander just had the idea of conquering the entire persian empire.

it’s a great idea.

he was great.

and now he’s dead.

hopefully the rest of the gang will be able to share the empire evenly between them.

knock knock, it’s chandragupta, he says get the hell out of here.

will you get the hell out of here if i give you 500 elephants?

ok thanks, bye

time to conquer all of india

or

most of india

but what about this part?

that’s the tamil kings, no one conquers the tamil kings.

who are the tamil kings?

merchants, probably

and they’ve got spices

who would like to buy the spices?

me, said the arabians, swiftly buying it and selling it to the rest of the world.

hey, china put itself back together again, with good morals as their main philosophy.

actually, they have three main philosophies.

out here, the horse nomads run wild and free, and they would like to ransack your city.

let’s check the greekification levels of the greekified kingdoms.

greekification overload!

bye, said the parthians.

bye, said the jews.

hi, said the parthians, taking over the entire place.

heyyyyyyyy, said the romans, eating the entire mediterranean for breakfast.

thanks for invading our homeland, said the jews, who were starting to get tired of people invading their homeland.

hi, everything’s great, said some guy who seems to be getting very popular and is then arrested and killed for being too popular, which only makes him more popular.

you could make a religion out of this.

want silk?

now you can buy it from china.

they just made a

brand new road to the world

or you can

get there on water

sick! new trade routes! said india, accidentally spreading their religion to the entire southeast.

hmm, that’s a good place for an epic trading kingdom.

there goes buddhism traveling up the silk road.

i wonder if it’ll reach china before it collapses again.

remember the persian empire?

yep, said the persians, making a new one.

axum is getting so powerful they would like to build a long stick.

has anyone populated madagascar yet?

let’s do it together.

china is whole again

then it broke again

still can’t cross the sahara desert?

try camels.

hell yeah! now we’ve got business

said the ghana empire, selling lots of gold, and slaves

hi, i live in the roman empire, and i was wondering

is loving jesus legal yet?

no.

actually, ok, sure, said constantine, moving the capital way over here to be closer to his

main rival

don’t worry about rome, it won’t fall.

it’s the golden age of india

there’s the gupta empire, not chandragupta, just gupta.

first name chandra.

the first.

guess who’s in rome?

barbarians

what’s a barbarian?

non-romans, said the romans, being invaded by non-romans.

r.i.p., roman empire, er, actually just half of it, the other half is just fine, but it’s not in rome anymore so let’s give it a new name.

the mayans have figured out the stars

oh and here’s a huge city, population: everyone

the göktürks have taken over the entire eurasian steppe.

great job, göktürks.

how’s india?

broken.

how’s china?

back together

how’s those trading kingdoms?

bigger, and there’s more of them

korea has 3 kingdoms.

japan has a kingdom, it’s the sunrise kingdom.

deep in the arabian desert, on the top of a mountain, the real god whispers in muhammed’s ear.

so he goes down to the cube where everyone worships gods and he tells them their gods are all fake.

and everyone got so mad at him that he had to leave town and go to a different town.

you could make a religion out of this.

and maybe conquer the world as well.

the roman empire is long gone, but somehow the pope is still the pope.

plus there’s

new kingdoms all over europe

i wonder if there’s room for moors.

here’s all the wisdom.

in a house.

it’s the baghdad house of wisdom.

just in time for the

islamic golden age

let’s bring stuff to the coast and sell it, and become the swahili on the swahili coast, said the swahili on the swahili coast.

remember this tiny space you have to go through to get from here to there?

someone owns that now.

wanna get enlightened in the middle of nowhere?

the franks have the biggest kingdom in europe, and the pope is so proud that he invites the king over for christmas.

surprise! you’re the new roman emperor, said the pope, pretending to still be part of the roman empire.

then the franks broke their kingdom into what will later be called france and not france.

but the northerners, or just norse if you don’t have much time, are exploring.

they go north, from the north to the northern north.

and they find some land.

two types of land.

and they name them accordingly.

they also invade some other places, and get called many names, such as vikings.

there’s the rus.

the kievan rus.

are they vikings?

i don’t think so, said the kievan rus.

ok, fair enough.

the pope is ready to make some more emperors.

of the “roman empire”.

the holy roman empire.

it’s actually germany but don’t worry about it.

new kingdoms.

christianize all the kingdoms

which brand would you like?

mine’s better.

mine’s better.

mine’s better.

time to conquer england, said william.

it’s a bird, it’s a plane

it’s the seljuk turks

aah! said the byzantine empire who’s getting so small and almost doesn’t exist anymore.

we need help!

they need help, so they call the pope.

hey pope, can you help us get rid of the seljuks?

maybe take back the holy land on the way?

come on, i know you want to take back the holy land.

yes, i do actually want to do that.

let’s do a crusade.

crusade

they did many crusades, some of which almost didn’t fail.

but at least the italians got some sweet trade deals.

goodbye mayans.

hello toltecs

goodbye toltecs.

hello mississippi

look at those mounds.

there’s the pueblo.

i always wondered how to build a town in a cliff.

guess who’s here?

khmer.

where?

here.

and pagan is there.

vietnam unconquered itself, korea just became itself, and japan is so addicted to art that the military might have to take over the government.

china just invented bombs, and typing.

and the mongols just invaded most of the universe.

nice going, Genghis!

i bet that will last a long time.

some of the islamic turks were unaffected by the mongol invasions because they were busy invading india.

is it tonga time?

i think it’s tonga time.

i just found out where the swahili gets all their gold.

look at this chad.

means “lake”.

there’s an empire there.

right in the middle of

Africa

the king of mali is so rich he’s going on tour to let everyone know.

wow, that guy’s rich, everyone said.

the christians are doing a great job reconquering iberia, which will soon be called spain and not spain.

please remain christian.

we will check in later to see if you’re still christian when you least expect.

whoops, half of europe just died.

ming

china’s back, yay!

hey khmer, time to share.

new kingdoms here and there.

oh, look who controls all the islands.

it’s the mahajapit.

majahapit.

mapajahit.

mahapajit.

mapajahit.

majapahit?

oh, italy’s really rich, time for them to care a lot about art and the ancient classics.

it’s kinda like a rebirth.

here’s a printer.

let’s make books.

so you think you can conquer the byzantine empire?

yep, said the ottoman turks.

nice job, ottoman turks.

whoops, you missed a spot.

don’t forget to ban europe from the indian spice trade.

what? that’s bullshit, said portugal, spiceless.

well i guess we’ll have to find another way to india

wait! said christopher columbus, probably smoking crack.

if the world is round, let’s go this way to india.

nah, don’t worry, we already got this, said portugal.

so chris goes to spain.

hey spain, wanna hire me to find india by going around back of the world?

no.

please?

no.

please?

no.

please?

ok.

so he sails into the ocean.

and discovers more ocean.

and then discovers the indies.

and japan.

let’s draw a line to decide who gets which half of the world.

the aztec and inca empires are off to a great start.

i wonder if they know that europe just discovered their continent?

the habsburgs are marrying into so many royal families they might have to start marrying each other.

move over lithuania, here comes moscow.

ivan wants to make russia great again.

move over timurids, maybe go invade india or something.

persia just made persia persian again.

let’s make it the other kind of islam.

the one where we thought the first guy should have been the other guy.

hey christians!

do you sin?

now you can buy your way out of hell.

that’s bullshit.

this whole thing is bullshit.

that’s a scam.

fuck the church.

here’s 95 reasons why, said martin luther, in his new book, which might have accidentally started the protestant reformation.

you know what would be magnificent, said suleiman, wearing an onion hat?

what if the ottoman empire was really big?

which it is now.

what if russia was big? said ivan, trying not to be terrible.

portugal had a dream that they controlled the entire indian ocean, including the spice trade.

and then that dream was real.

and spain realized that this is not india, but they pillaged it anyway.

damn, said england and france.

we gotta start pillaging some stuff.

then the dutch revolt and all the hipsters move to amsterdam.

damn, said amsterdam.

we gotta start pillaging some stuff.

question 1: can you get to india through north america?

no, but at least there’s beaver.

question 2: steal the spice trade.

that’s not a question, but the dutch did it anyway.

sugar

guess where all the sugar’s made?

in brazil.

stolen

and the caribbean.

and it’s so god damn profitable you might forget to not do slavery.

the next thing on russia’s to-do list is to get bigger.

britain and france are having a friendly discussion about who should control the entire world.

more specifically, ohio.

then it escalates into a seven year discussion, giving prussia a chance to show austria who’s boss.

but what about britain and france, did they figure out who’s boss?

yes they did.

it’s britain.

guess who’s broke?

also britain.

so they start taxing the hell out of america.

fuck you, says america, declaring their independence, and fighting for it.

and france helps them win, now france is broke.

and britain’ll have to send their prisoners to a different continent.

wait, if france is broke, why do the king and queen still wear such fancy dresses?

let’s overthrow the palace and cut all their heads off! said robespierre, cutting everybody’s head off until someone eventually got mad and cut his head off.

you could make a reli- no, don’t.

haiti is staring to like the idea of a revolution.

especially the slaves, who free themselves by killing their masters.

why didn’t we think of this before?

wait, who’s in charge of france now?

me

said napoleon, trying to take over europe.

luckily, they banished him to an island.

but he came back

luckily, they banished him to another island.

there goes latin america, becoming independent in the latin american wars of independence.

britain just figured out how to turn steam into power.

so now they can make

many different types of machines and factories with machines in them so they can make a lot of products real fast

then they invent some trains.

and conquer india and maybe put some trains there.

hey, china! said britain.

buy stuff from us!

nah dude, we already got everything, says china.

so britain tried to get them addicted to opium.

which worked, actually.

but then china made it illegal and dumped it all into the sea.

so britain threw a hissy fit, and made them open up five cities and give them an island.

britain and russia are playing a game where they try to stop each other from conquering afghanistan.

also, the

sultan of oman lives in zanzibar now

“that’s just where he lives”

india just had a revolution, and they would like to govern themselves now.

nope, said britain, governing them even harder than before.

technology is about to go crazy

the united states finally figured out whether slavery is good or bad.

it’s bad, they decided.

and then they continued manifesting their destiny, which is to kill the rest of the natives and take their land and maybe kick out the mexicans too.

i know, let’s rape africa, said europe, scrambling to see who could rape it the fastest.

theynevergotethiopia

britain and france are still hungry.

theynevergotthailand

the united states ran out of destiny to manifest, so they’re looking for more.

hawaii

cuba

wait, spain controls cuba.

well, blame something on them and go to war!

what should we blame on spain?

let’s blame the maine on spain.

so they blame the maine on spain.

now we’re in business.

to celebrate, they kick panama out of panama and make a canal, connecting the two oceans.

britain just found oil in the middle east.

itmakescarsgo

china is so tired of being bossed around that they delete their old government and make a new, stronger government, which is accidentally weaker and controlled by a guy from the previous government.

europe hasn’t had a war since the last war.

so they start world war 1.

look at those guns.

it’s gonna be a great war.

so great we won’t need a second one.

after it’s over, they blame germany.

russia went on strike and the workers overthrew the government.

now everyone’s paycheck is the same.

communism

in the soviet union

the arabs revolt and britain helps.

now the ottoman empire’s gone so we can give the

jewish people a place to live

hopefully the arabs won’t mind.

let’s cut the cake, said sykes and picot, carving up the remains of the not-so-ottoman-anymore empire.

except turkey, turkey makes a brand new turkey

and then the saudis conquer arabia.

it just seemed like the right thing to do.

hello?

yes, it’s the 1920’s calling.

let’s get in the car and drive to a party and listen to jazz on the radio and go to the movies.

the economy’s great and it’ll probably be great forever, just kidding.

germany’s back, featuring hitler, the angry mustache model.

and he’s mad at the jews for existing.

japan is finally conquering the east, and they’re so excited they rape nanking way too hard.

they should probably just deny it.

hitler’s out of control.

so the international community tackles him and then tries to explain why killing all the jews is a bad idea.

but he kills himself before they could explain it to him.

that’s world war 2

bonus round!

pacific showdown.

united states vs. japan.

fight!

finish him

let’s unite all the nations and have some

world peace

seems legit.

hi, i’m gandhi, and if britain doesn’t get the hell out of india, i’m gonna starve myself in public.

wow, that worked?

bonus, now there’s pakistan.

actually two pakistans.

one of them can be bangladesh later.

the jews and the arabs finally figured out which one of them should live in the holy land.

me, they both said at the same time.

let’s divide up the land so everyone’s happy.

sike, they both get angrier

look out china, there’s a new china in china.

what’s on the menu?

communism!

no thanks, said the other china, escaping to an island.

i wonder which one is the real china?

there’s the korean war, korea versus korea.

nobody wins, then it’s on pause forever.

let’s meet the sponsors.

oh, it’s the two global superpowers.

they’re having a friendly debate over which economic system is good, and which one is an evil virus of Satan.

and they both have atom bombs.

fight!

wait, no, that would be the end of the world.

let’s just keep it cool and spy on each other instead.

and make sure we have enough atom bombs.

i’ll race you to space.

now let’s make some more countries fight themselves.

europe is tired of pillaging other continents, so the continents they were pillaging are tired of being pillaged.

so here’s a new map, with new countries.

now you can’t tell who they’re being pillaged by.

the united states finally decided whether racism is good or bad.

they decided it’s bad, and the world agrees.

south africa might need another minute to think about it.

let’s check the world population.

whoa.

okay.

technology’s better too, that might keep happening.

the soviet union decides to relax a little, and accidentally falls apart.

europe makes a union, so now they can all use the same money, except britain, because they don’t feel like it.

let’s check the mail.

surprise, it’s on the computer.

whoops, someone just attacked america.

i bet they’ll remember that.

phone call.

surprise, it’s in your pocket.

wanna learn everything?

surprise, it’s on the computer.

now your phone’s a computer, which is in your pocket.

whoops, the economy just crashed.

don’t worry, the big banks won’t fail because they’re not supposed to.

surprise!

flying robots.

with bombs.

wanna print a brain?

some people have no friends.

some people have no food.

the globe is warming

and the ocean is full of plastic

let’s save the planet! said everybody, not knowing how.

let’s invent a thing inventor, said the thing inventor inventor, after being invented by a thing inventor.

that’s pretty cool.

by the way, where the hell are we?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuCn8ux2gbs&t=329s

Hi! Okay since again it seems like we’re not getting our Yousana update today I’ve decided to make part II of my last post. I had a lot of fun doing the chats so it’s mostly chat centered but it was a little bit of writing too. 

I hope you like it :D 



—x—

She knew they had arrived, it’s not like they were silent. She had told him that he could come, that she didn’t have a problem with him being there but that didn’t mean it was easy.

She was definitely not ready to see him, to be in the same room as him so he had spent the whole day in her room thinking of an excuse to get out.

She thought about asking the girls to hang out but being honest, she didn’t feel like it. So she took a deep breath and thought about who she wanted to be with in that moment, and two names came to her mind: Isak and Even. They’d always find a way to make her feel good even though they didn’t know anything that was happening in her life. She texted Isak asking if she could come over to their house, she was in fact a little late with her biology homework since that past weekend had been hell for her. Isak didn’t hesitate to answer with a big yes, although he said he did have to find a way to make Even promise that he wouldn’t distract them.

With the plan arranged, she finally got out of her room. She entered the living room where the boys were preparing the things to film their video. She tried so hard not to look at Yousef but as soon as she put one foot on the room her eyes went straight at him. He was already looking at her with a shy smile. He clearly didn’t know what to do. She took a deep breath and shook her head a little bit to concentrate before looking at her brother.

“Elias, I’m leaving so you can have the house to yourselves” she said.

“You don’t have to that Sana” Elias said.

“It’s okay, I’m meeting a friend to study”

“Which friend? Noora? Eva? Vilde? You can ask them to come if you want, I mean so you don’t have to leave” Elias said smiling.

Adam and Mutasim nodded enthusiastically, approving Elias’ idea. Mikael just stood there indifferent. Yousef on the other hand was feeling a little bit guilty because he knew he was the reason for her to leave.

“He’s a boy. Are you still so eager for me to bring him? So I don’t have to leave of course” Sana said rolling her eyes.

“Should I be worried about this guy?” Elias asked her acting like a protective brother

“It’s none of your business actually”

She motioned to leave but she stopped when her phone beeped. It was a message from Isak. She opened the chat while the rest of the guys, except Yousef who was still thinking about Sana’s mysterious guy, teased Elias.

She couldn’t help but smile at the text. She loved Isak’s and Even’s relationship, they loved each other but they didn’t force it, unlike some other people.

“A message from your boy?” Elias asked raising an eyebrow noticing Sana’s smile

“Bye Elias” she said turning around and leaving trying not to look at Yousef, who was still concentrated on her.

 —–

She was almost at Isak’s house when her phone beeped.

She smiled to herself. Yousef being jealous of Isak, now that was funny.

 ——–

She had spent a great afternoon with Isak and Even. She and Isak had been studying biology while Even made them sandwiches and really tried not to bother them. After a while they had taken a break and the three of them had ended on the couch talking about random things. Once again she had felt so comfortable around then.

She was now getting ready to sleep when her phone beeped startling her.

 She still didn’t know what she was going to do but what she did know was that she was definitely going to bed with a smile on her face.


Sooo this is it. I hope you liked it. I know it’s not really good but honestly I just wanted an excuse to make more chats ‘cause it is really funny.

I don’t think I’ll write another fic until we get an update because I don’t want to like write a parallel story from the show

Thank you so much for reading. And again sorry if there are any mistakes

take my hand

request from @boymeetsfiction : A cute lil request where Tae and reader go to an ice rink? Love you~~ heheehehehehe

Originally posted by fyeahbangtaned

[Taehyung x Reader]

Genre: Fluff, a little Angsty

Words: 3593

—> You lean against the gate and watch him skate for a moment, smiling a bit at how much fun he seems to be having. He’s laughing and spinning in circles, looking absolutely carefree. 

A/N: Thank you Tamara for sending this request in! And I hope you all enjoy this xoxo


First dates were always nerve wracking, but this one made you feel especially anxious.  

Keep reading

Surprises...(Part two)- Josh Dun

As the bus came to a stop at the arena they were playing that night Lauren got really excited.

“Daddy, is uncle Tyler here?” she asked beaming with excitement.

“Yeah, he’s somewhere. Probably still sleeping on his bus. It’s kind of early.” Josh said turning his attention from you to his daughter.

“I wanna see them though. When can we see them?” Lauren asked.

“Lauren, calm down. We’ll have some breakfast then we’ll go bug them.” you said.

Both your kids immediately got up picking up their toys and sat at the table.

“Wow, they’re so trained.” Josh chuckled.

“Well one of us has to be strict. I mean you’re like another child, but I love it.” you said pulling out a box of cereal and pouring a bowl for each of your kids (including Josh).

“Mommy, don’t be mean to daddy. He’s more fun.” Lauren said shoving cereal down her throat.

“Hey, that wasn’t very nice. Mom can be fun too.” Josh defended you.

“Lauren who brings you shopping?” you asked knowing how much she loves it.

“You.” she said.

“See. Therefore I’m more fun.” you said and it made Lauren laugh.

After breakfast you cleaned up the mess and Josh played with the kids just enjoying the time you got together.

“So, Tyler just texted me saying he is on his way over.” Josh said and it made both your kids cheer.

“Jackson, come on let’s go hid.” Lauren said eagerly taking her brother’s hand and pulling him into her bunk.

After a few moments the bus door flew open and Tyler climbed on and Jenna followed.

“Y/N you’re here. How you been?” Tyler asked giving you a hug.

“Great, now that I’m here with all my favorite people.” you replied.

“Speaking of where are those crazy children of yours?” Tyler asked and you could hear giggling from the bunks. He walked back quietly to go sneak up on them.

“So you’re finally here. We’ve missed you guys.” Jenna said hugging you.

“I know. I’ve missed everyone so much. But Lauren has school, so it’s hard pulling her for long periods.” you said.

You could hear laughter from the back of the bus where Josh, Tyler, and the kids were all playing.

You and Jenna hung out just catching up for a while in the front.

“So Tyler and I want to give you and Josh so alone time with no kids. Can we take them tonight? They can sleep on our bus.” Jenna offered.

“Oh you don’t have to.”

“No. really we want to. I can’t imagine what it’s like being away from Tyler for so long. You and Josh need time to hang out and be adults.” she said with a wink.

“Oh yeah, that won’t be happening. I’ll be fast asleep as soon as we get on the bus tonight.” you said knowing that she was implying you and Josh were going to have sex.

“You have 3 weeks to catch up on sleep. Have some fun.” she said laughing.

You were glad you had a close relationship with Jenna and could talk about things like that.

Later…

Tyler was singing some nonsense into the microphone. Josh sat with you on the empty arena floor that would soon be filled with hundreds of screaming fans.

“This is amazing.” you said in total awe.

“I know. To just think you were pregnant for Lauren when I joined the band and now she’s running around with our son in this huge venue.” Josh said as he watched the kids chasing each other in the big empty space.

“Guess I should go up there and practice with him now.” Josh said with a sigh.

“Why did you sigh?” you asked turning to him.

“It just sucks. I mean I finally get to be with you and I have to work.” he said putting his hands up in slight defeat.

“I don’t mind. At least we’re together while you work. Not to mention how much  I love watching you drum.” you said placing a kiss on his cheek. “Now go play.”

He got up and jogged to the stage where your two kids followed him.

“Can we play?” Lauren asked Josh.

He looked to Tyler to see if he had time, Tyler shook his head as an indication to let them play.

“Sure but only for a few minutes, then I have to get to work.”

He put both the kids on either knee and let them bang away on the drums. This was one of the things you missed the most about Josh being home. Seeing him with his kids was heart warming. He adored them and hated when he had to leave.

After a couple minutes you went up and told your kids it was time to go lay down and relax. You liked keeping them on a schedule even if they were having a good time. Josh understood and told them they could drum again later.

Back on the bus now you laid on the couch while your kids were in their bunks asleep. Scrolling through your social media trying to relax before tonight’s show.

Suddenly the bus door swung open and Josh climbed on.

“Shh.. they’re sleeping.” you said sitting up and motioning for him to sit with you.

“Right, sorry.” he said sitting down and pulling you to his lap.

“So this is the first time we’ve had some alone time.” he said leaning in and connecting your lips with his.

“Mommy?” yelled your son from the bunks of the bus.

You pulled away from the kiss “guess that was the end of that.” you said and stood and walked to the bunks.

Walking with your son on your hip back to the couch you saw Josh at the counter making a 4 sandwiches.

“Hey buddy you hungry?” Josh asked putting the food in front of your son who was now at the table.

“Of course he is, they both eat like you, 24/7.” you joked and Lauren came out sitting next to you at the table and ate.

“Sorry guys, I would love to stay but I have to go do some interviews. I’ll see you guys right before the show?” Josh said after you all finished lunch.

“Okay. we’ll meet up in your dressing room before?” you suggested.

“Sounds perfect. I love you guys. Bye.” Josh left the bus and you were back to being alone with your kids. Until Jenna came and took them.

“I know you need a break Y/N. They’re always good for me. I’ll bring them to hang out with me, go watch Josh’s interviews. You don’t get to see him much.enjoy it while you can.” she said.

“Thanks Jenna. You’re right, I do need time. Thank you so much.”

“Are we still taking them tonight? I was kind of looking forward to it.” Jenna said with your kids begging you to stay overnight on Tyler and Jenna’s bus.

“Sure. Don’t have too much fun without me.” you joked before leaving and walking to the arena to find Josh.

You found Josh and Tyler in the middle of an interview so you snuck in and sat behind the camera and Josh’s face suddenly light up.

“So, both of you are married, what’s that like being on tour and all?” the interviewer asked.

“Well it’s great for me because I can have my wife Jenna with me.” Tyler said.

“and you Josh? You have a child right? Is it different?” the interviewer turned the question to Josh.

He looked at you then to his hands then back to the interviewer.

“Yeah, I have 2 kids now actually, a 5 and 3 year old. It was easier before my daughter went to school because they would come on tour with me the whole time. Now they visit when they can and I go home if I have a day or two off. I miss them so much when I’m gone and they actually came this morning and it’s really exciting to be spending the next 3 weeks with them. You know get in all those adorable moments in before they grow up.” he said with the biggest smile on his face.

Once the interview was over Josh stood and walked over to where leaning against the wall.

“Hey there babe.” he said with a smirk on his face. “Where are the kids?”

“They are with Jenna right now.”

“Well that’s perfect. That was my last interview and I still have about 30 minutes before I have to get ready. So what do you say we head to my dressing room and you know, catch up.” he said kissing your forehead and taking your hand in his.

“Let’s go.” you said and he lead you to the dressing room.

He pushed you down on the couch that was in the center of the room and hovered over you. He placed a deep kiss to your lips and started to move down to your neck. You tilted your head up to expose more of your neck. When he found your spot you let out a quiet moan.

“Moaning just from this, what will happen when I get you alone again?” he said smugly.

“Well Jenna and Tyler offered to take the kids tonight, so I guess we won’t have to wait to long to find out.” you said as he moved farther down lifting your shirt.

“That’s something to look forward to.” he said.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door.

Josh pulled off of you and chuckled as you sat up and readjusted yourself.

He looked at you for approval to open the door and you gave him a nod.

“Hey sorry to interrupt anything, but Jenna is headed in with the kids right now and I didn’t want them witnessing anything life scarring.” Tyler joked walking into the room. He was followed by Jenna and the kids who walked in just seconds after.

It was finally time for the Josh and Tyler to go on. Josh played like he hadn’t played in so long. He was great, it just showed how much he was different when you were around. He was so much happier and everyone noticed.

As you stood on the side with your kids your son soon grew antsy.

“I wanna play. Please, can I?” Jackson begged pulling on your sleeve.

“Jackson, he’s playing for the fans right now. Maybe another time.” you tried to reason with him, but he’s 3. There’s not much reasoning you can do.

As Tyler made his way to talk to the fans Jackson let go of your hand and ran on to stage.

“Jackson, get back here.” you whisper yelled.

Josh was shocked when he felt his son climbing onto his lap. You made your way out onto stage to grab Jackson when the fans started to interrupt Tyler’s speech by cheering when they saw you.

“Oh looks like Josh has some company. Guys welcome Y/N, Josh’s wife and Jackson the future drummer.” Tyler joked as you took Jackson off his lap.

“Sorry bout that.” you apologized.

“No worries.” he stood and leaned into your ear. “Have these kids on the other bus before I get to you. It’s been too long, if you know what I mean.” he gave you a kiss then gave your son a kiss on his forehead.

“I do.” you said then walked off.

Once Trees was performed you told Jenna that she should probably take the kids now. She took the hint and brought your kids to her and Tyler’s bus.

Josh told you to go to the bus while he washed up. So you made your way there and waited patiently.

After about 30 minute of waiting you texted him.

To Josh

Hurry up, I’m growing impatient.

Sent 11:32pm

From Josh

Eager much. I’ll be there in a minute.

Received 11:33pm

You got up and stripped down to just underwear and bra. You were in need of his touch. He was right it had been too long.

The bus door swung open and Josh hurried on, locking the door. He turned around and saw that you weren’t wearing much and blushed.

“Guess I was right about you being eager, huh?” he asked pinning you against the wall.

“Well I can’t help myself. Seeing you play makes me, I don’t know.” you closed the space between your lips.

Josh broke the kiss to pull off his shirt and pants. He placed his hands on your hips and started kissing you again. You could feel how hard he was getting against your leg.

“Oh and I was the eager one.” you sassed.

“Did you just get mouthy with me?” he asked teasingly. “Go lay down in the bunk.” he said and you walked off. “Loose the bra and underwear too.” he called after you.

You dropped the remainder of your clothing on the floor before climbing into the bunk.

Josh came in a few minutes later and climbed on top of you. Without anymore talking you two were attached at the lips. He moved his way down your naked body leaving small hickeys on his way.

“Josh please. Do something, touch me.”

He moved farther down granting your wish and started working on your clit. He sucked on it and when you let out a moan he put a finger inside of you.

“You’re so wet baby.”

“Fuck Josh, it’s been so long I’m close already.” you could barely speak.

He removed his fingers and you whimpered from the loss of pleasure.

He lined himself up and teased you with the tip of his cock.

“How bad do you want it?” Josh asked into your neck.

“So bad. Please fuck me Josh.” you begged.

He put his lips to your neck and thrusted inside you.

“Fuck you’re so tight. God I’ve missed this cunt so bad baby.”

“Josh, faster. Your big dick feels so good.” he moved faster and you felt him twitch inside you when you clenched around him.

“Are you close?” he asked.

“Yeah. I’m about to cum.”

“Do it baby. I want you to cum all over me.”

He thrusted into you a few more times before you hit your climax and you moaned his name as he cummed inside you. He rode out both your orgasms before flopping down next to you.

“Fuck that was… wow.” Josh said and you giggled.

“I know. I think I forget how much I miss the real thing.” you said pulling the covers over you and Josh.

“What do you mean ‘real thing’?” Josh asked pulling you close.

“Do you really think I go months without any attention. I have to do things on my own when you’re not around.” you said closing your eyes.

“So you’re a naughty girl, I see. What do you say we go for round two?”

“Not right now. I haven’t gotten a good night sleep in so long. We have 3 weeks to make up for lost time and trust me this isn’t the only night Jenna and Tyler will have the kids.” you said.

“I like the sound of that.” he placed a kiss to your forehead and you closed your eyes. “Good night Y/N. I love you so much.”

“I love you too.” then you fell asleep with Josh right next to you.

This is Spiderman (Peter Parker x Reader)

Originally posted by jxmesmcavoy

Word Count: 1354

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

AN: So in this the reader is Tony Stark’s daughter because I love Tony. Hope you like it :)

You were a Stark. Yes, that came with a lot of problems, such as trying to keep yourself safe from anyone who could use you to hurt your father since he was also Iron Man. So, not many people knew you existed, well, as a Stark anyway. Your dad made sure you kept a low profile because he couldn’t bare to have anything happen to you. At school you used a fake last name and kept to yourself and your few friends. Your life wasn’t that exciting, until you met Peter Parker.


It was a Sunday morning and you really didn’t feel like getting out of bed, so you didn’t. You were watching an anime series when you heard your dad come home. You knew he would be at your door any minute now.

The door opened to reveal your dad and, an attractive teenage boy?! You were so shocked and surprised that you, well, you fell off the bed. There is an attractive teenage boy standing in your doorway and you’re in your pajamas that have a stain from the cereal you split on yourself earlier that morning and your hair resembled a birds nest. Abort mission abort mission!

“Y/N? What are you doing on the floor?” Your dad gave you a strange look.

“Gosh dad can you knock next time? You’re worse than Vision!” You finally stood up, pulling at your hair and clothes, trying to make yourself look more presentable. 

“Anyway…I’d like you to meet our newest recruit Peter Parker, also known as Spider-man.” Your eyes widened at this. Not only was this guy extremely attractive, but he’s also Spider-man?! You’ve secretly had the biggest crush on Spider-man ever since you saw him swinging around on the web (hehe get it).

You started to get all nervous, you couldn’t believe this was happening. He finally spoke up. “Um-hey, i’m Peter. It’s really nice to meet you.” He shyly said as his cheeks flushed red. “Gosh he was so cute.” You thought to yourself.

“Oh-um-i’m-ugh-” Your nerves were getting the better of you, but Tony interrupted you anyway, realizing what was going on here. He knew what this was. Two teenagers acting nervous around each other, blushing and Y/N finding difficulty in telling Spiderling her own name. He wouldn’t let this happen, not with his daughter!

“Yes and you’re Y/N. My daughter. Who is off limits to you Spiderling so don’t get any ideas.” Tony was frustrated now and was adamant on keeping you two apart.

Both you and Peter blushed even more now, embarrassed at Tony’s words. Trust Tony to ruin any chances you have of dating.

“I wasn’t…uh.” Peter was at a loss for words.

Thankfully Tony put an end to the awkward tension in the air. “I need to make some upgrades to your suit, come one.” Tony gestured towards Peter, who began following your dad to his lab.

“see ya around Y/N.” Peter shyly said before he left.

A few seconds later you awkwardly shout out. “Ugh-bye Peter!” You cringe at yourself for being such a dork. You were terrible at talking to guys. But hopefully you’d be seeing more of Spider-man. 


Overtime, Peter came to the tower more frequently and you tended to avoid him. It’s not like you were avoiding him because you didn’t like him. It was actually the opposite, you did like him and that was problematic because every time you’re around him you turn into a nervous and mumbling mess, honestly just embarrassing yourself.

 One night your were staying up late, watching the fourth Harry Potter movie (because it was your favourite) and eating cereal on the couch. You were watching and reacting to the movie as is you had never seen it before, when in reality you had watched it probably 100 times. You were too busy laughing at Ron wearing his hand-me-down dress robes, that you didn’t hear Peter walk in.

So when he said “hey” you fell of the couch muttering a “holy shit!”, being jump scared by Parker, or should you say Spider-man? Why do you keep falling off things in front of him? You’d never actually seen him in his suit up close, it was, amazing. Why was he wearing his suit around anyway? Peter’s laughter cut off your thinking, he pulled off his mask.

 “What the heck Peter, you scared the hell out of me.” 

He ran his fingers through his hair, still laughing at your reaction, but managed to stop his laughter to ask. “What are you doing up?”

“Watching Harry Potter, eating cereal, apparently being jump scared by Spider-man.” You huffed and crossed your arms, annoyed at Peter for scaring you like that. “Anyway, why are you walking around in your Spidey suit?”

Ignoring your question, he continues. “Cereal at night?”

“Cereal is amazing Parker.” 

“I won’t fight you on that.”

“Lucky for you because i’d win.” You don’t know where this confidence came from, but you liked it.

Peter smirks “Oh really?” 

“Yup. Anyway you didn’t answer my question.”

“I was just testing out an upgrade to my web shooters.” 

“Is it fun? Swinging on webs from building to building I mean?”

“Why don’t you find out?” Peter said with a mischievous grin.

You were hesitant at first. Yes, swinging around the city sounded fun but you also didn’t feel like being accidentally dropped to your death tonight. “Oh no-I couldn’t.” 

“Don’t worry, I promise you, no, I swear to you on my life that I will not let anything happen to you.” His words earned your trust, you hesitantly nodded your head, both of you walking to the balcony.

“Just, make sure you hold on tight.” You obliged, shyly wrapping your arms around his waist, him wrapping an arm around yours. Oh god you were really close to him right now and your cheeks must be so red.

“What if-” But your words were cut off, as you Peter jumped off the edge, taking you with him. You instinctively clung to Peter and buried your head into his chest like your life depended on it, because, well it kind of did right now. Then with a thwip! he launched his web shooter to the closest building. 

Finally looking up, you were left in awe at the sights in front of you. Everything looked so small from up here and so beautiful. Peter kept shooting his webs from one building to the next, but was moving a little slower than usual since he had you with him. You couldn’t even form any words, you were left speechless. This was the most incredible experience you’ve ever had. 

Once you both landed back at the balcony you turned to Peter and jumped, embracing him in a hug with your arms around his neck. “That was amazing, honestly that was so much fun! You invented that webbing?! That’s so freaking cool Parker I don’t think you even know.” 

Realizing you were still wrapped around him you quickly took a step backwards, embarrassed at your actions.

Peter chuckled, he thought you were extremely cute. “Thanks. We can do that again sometime-if if you want to that is?” He nervously asked, you always seemed to make him nervous.

“I’d like that.” You smiled up at Peter, him blushing like crazy.

“But for now, do you want to maybe-I dunno, watch the rest of this movie with me?” You pointed back to the TV which was still playing Harry Potter. Peter nodded and you both spent the rest of the night curled up together in blankets on the couch. You had accidentally fallen asleep on Peter towards the end of the movie. 

Once it ended, he looked down at you taking in all your features as you silently slept on his lap. “Gosh you’re so beautiful.” He said quietly to try and not wake you, not knowing that you heard everything he just said. He leaned down and kissed your forehead, laying you down on the couch and covering you with the blankets. Peter muttered a quiet “goodnight” and left the tower, also leaving you with butterflies in your stomach.

everyone arguing about who they "ship" infj with
  • INFJ: ENFP, what are you doing with my phone?
  • ENFP: *typing furiously* Um. Nothing?
  • INFJ: Well, it doesn't LOOK like nothing. Give the phone back! *extends her hand and glowers*
  • ENFP: For such a nice person, you really can be intimidating, INFJ. Yeesh. *hands phone back to her*
  • INFJ: /Thank/ you.
  • INFJ: ... Why did you text INTP 'I must profess my undying love to you or I will implode'?!
  • ENFP: Well... You guys are just so /cute/ together! *smiles dreamily* Especially how he blushes whenever I bring you up.
  • INFJ: *sighing* ENFP, that's just because you keep bugging him about us becoming a couple. Which, by the way, is NOT happening.
  • ENFP: Ohmygosh, he's texting you back! Squeeee!
  • INFJ: You did not just use 'squee' in a conversation.
  • ENFP: Yes, I did.
  • ENFP: You're so cynical today. *squints at her* ...Have you been hanging out with INTJ lately?
  • INFJ: *folding her arms* How did you know?
  • ENFP: *smirking* It's a gift. Oh, look, he just sent a response!!
  • INFJ: *flatly* 'ENFP, give INFJ her phone back.' Oh, so romantic.
  • ENFP: Hey, you two are a work in progress, okay?!
  • ENTP: *approaching them* Hello, INFJ. ENFP.
  • INFJ: Hi.
  • ENFP: Ooh, ENTP! Just the person I wanted to see. Don't you agree that INTP x INFJ /must/ become a reality?!
  • ENTP: Well, actually--
  • ENFP: Yes?
  • ENTP: --I think that INFJ with INTJ would be much more preferable.
  • ENFP: *scowling* No. Way. INTJ is mine!
  • ENTP: But, doesn't he hate you?!
  • ENFP: He's madly in love with me. He just won't admit it to himself. *sniffs*
  • INFJ: Guys, this is ridiculous. *glowers*
  • ENFP: Oooh, I know how to resolve this conflict!
  • INFJ: By admitting that you're being childish and immature, and stop trying to control my relationships?
  • ENFP: No, silly! By asking INTP who /he/ ships you with! *snatches INFJ's phone*
  • INFJ: Hey! Give that back!
  • ENFP: *gleefully* Nope.
  • ENTP: Just, ask him already!
  • ENFP: Alright, alright. *starts typing*
  • ENFP: ...Aaand, I sent it.
  • ENTP: *to INFJ* Okay, he's typing... And he says...
  • ENFP: Oh. My. Gosh. ENTP, read it aloud so that INFJ can hear what he responded!
  • ENTP: *reddening* No.
  • INFJ: You guys are being ridiculous! *snatches the phone back* And he said...
  • INFJ: *glances at ENTP* Oh.
  • ENFP: *mockingly* "Personally, I think that ENTP would be most compatible with INFJ."
  • INFJ: ...
  • ENTP: ...
  • INFJ: Bye now. *runs away*
Dream Date [Usnavi x Reader]

Length: 1456+ words

Genre: Fluff

TW: Just fluffy stuff

A/N: I AM SO SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG. HOLY FLIP. WHY AM I LIKE THIS?? Half my day has been spent trying to think of a title… I suck, I know- I’m sorry. Life has been so poor to me lately, but I’m trying to keep my head above water.

“You’re back,” Usnavi said quietly, his voice a little above a whisper. It’s been over a week since he saw you. You had told Usnavi that you were quitting the job he gave you at the convenience store before rushing out, giving him no time to ask you any questions.  

You offered a smile. “Not entirely.” You put a hand on his arm. “I got out, Usnavi.”

“What?”

“I was offered a job uptown,” you said, a huge smile on your face. “They wanted me to start right away- that’s why I had to leave so suddenly, but I got out.”

“I- I’m so happy for you,” he said, though his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Congratulations, Y/N.”  

“Thank you.” An awkward silence loomed between the two of you, and you wondered how it got to this point. You grew up with Usnavi- the both of you being best friends, but now, it seems like the week that you were gone felt like years. “Anyways, I should go. I have to unpack a bunch of things in my apartment.”  

“R-Right.”  

“Visit me?” You scribbled your new landline number, and apartment, and slid it across the counter to his waiting fingers.  

“Of course.”

“Bye Usnavi.”

“Bye Y/N.” Obviously it wasn’t the first time you guys had said goodbye, but you didn’t know why this one sounded different- it sounded more permanent.  

Keep reading

Chance-Part 2

*credit to gifs owner,I found it on google*


A/N:Here you go lovelies,hope ya like it xx


Word Count:728 


Pairings:Liam Dunbar x Reader,Theo Raeken x Reader


Part 1  , Part 3  , Part 4 


Y/N’s POV
Once we entered the restaurant I saw all the pack members present already.Me and Theo walked towards the table they sat.

“About time guys”,said Stiles.He looked slightly surprised seeing us together,but didn’t say anything.

Lydia and Kira smirked at me,I rolled my eyes knowing exactly what they’re thinking.

I took a seat and Theo sat beside me.We ordered our food and started talking.

“Dude,that Greenburg pisses me so much,he took my maths notebook few days ago and didn’t return it yet”,Stiles ranted.

“Tragic”,Lydia said sarcastically.

“Well-”,Stiles began,then got interrupted by Scott.

“Hey,that’s Liam”,he said.

“with Hayden as usual”,I mumbled.

“Hi guys,woah didn’t expect y'all”,Liam chuckled.

“Liam,why don’t you join us?”,Theo said.

“Yea sure”,Liam said and took a seat.Hayden looked slightly annoyed but didn’t say anything.

Our food arrived and we began to eat.

I saw Liam and Hayden’s interaction and felt jealous.Liam began to feed Hayden some fries,and they were being all lovey-dovey.

Theo suddenly leaned towards me and whispered,“Hey,you okay?”

“I’m fine,“I smiled at him.

I caught Liam looking at us briefly before continuing to pay attention to Hayden.

"Uh guys,we better leave now,Liam and I also made plans to watch some movies”,said Hayden.

“Oh yea,right”,Liam nodded.

“Okay,bye then,it was great having you two”,said Kira.

“See y'all at school tomorrow”,said Liam,then he left with Hayden.

“Guys we better head home as well,I have an essay to complete”, said Lydia.

Once we said our goodbyes,Theo and I sat in his car and he started driving.

“I had a great time today”,Theo grinned.

“I’m glad to know that”,I smiled.

“The pack is amazing and I’m really thankful that despite me doing horrible things,you all are giving me a second chance”,Theo said genuinely.

“Well everyone makes mistakes and you better not ruin your chance this time”,I jokingly yet seriously said the last part.

“Never”,he said confidently.

“So there’s this place in the woods,where I go to just feel relaxed and when I feel extremely lonely”,he began,“will you like to see that place?”,he asked me.

I was contemplating the decision as to whether it was too soon to trust him again.He,obviously,sensed my anxiousness.

“It’s okay,we can go some other time”,he said with a small smile.

I began to feel bad,maybe he’s actually changed?I thought.

“No,I want to go today”,I replied.

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

So he began to drive towards the woods,it was dark so I thought what could possibly be seen in darkness that makes him feel relaxed.

He stopped in front of a tree and got out the car,I followed him.He walked a few steps and I gasped seeing the sight in front of me.

The town is seen clearly from here,the lights in the town made it look beautiful from the far and the sky was full of stars.He sat on the ground and began patting the side beside him asking me to sit.I smiled and sat down next to him.

He sighed contendly and looked at me.

“So…?”, he asked.

“It’s beautiful”,I breathed.

He chuckled lowly,“I’m glad you liked it.”

“Thankyou for showing me this place”,I said.

He nodded and continued looking at the scene in front of us.

“Thankyou for coming here with me”,he said after awhile.

“It’s no big deal”,I said.

We stayed there for a long while then he drived me back to my home.The car ride was fun like before,this time we mocked few of our annoying classmates and talked about music and story books.We have a lot in common,I figured out.

I got out from his car and he walked me towards my door.

“Today was amazing”,he said.

“True,I enjoyed the evening”,I replied.

“So see you at school tomorrow?”

“Yea sure.”

“I know you’re car’s still broken,I can give you a ride to school tomorrow?”,he asked.

“That would be lovely,thankyou”,I replied.

“No problem,so bye!"he said.

"Goodbye”,I smiled.

He left,I enterd the house and grinned broadly.Theo is a great guy.I took my phone and sent Lydia a message saying she don’t need to pick me up tomorrow for school,Theo insisted to pick me up tomorrow.Lydia wanted to know details of what we did and talked about tomorrow at school.That girl,I swear to God.

I took shower and got ready for bed,slightly (actually very very) excited for tomorrow.

Send the Pain Below - Part 1

Word Count: 4359

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: Drug use, stalking, language, violence

A/N: Here’s my first Jensen x Reader! There’s not too much in this part, it’s basically building up to the reader becoming an addict, so it’s kind of slow. Sorry about that. I reallllly didn’t want this to become a series but apparently I can’t help it. For purposes of this fic Jensen is single and childless, no hate to queen Danneel! 

Italics are social media posts/comments. 

Y/T/H = your twitter handle 

Send the Pain Below Masterlist


“Hey Facebook!” You waved at your phone with your free hand and stood up, flipping the camera to face away from you into your trailer. “This is the set tour I promised would happen an hour ago, but it got a bit held up!” You spun around in a circle a few times, showing the inside of your trailer. “So this is my trailer. Forgive me I’m kind of a slob.” You chuckled and opened the door, stepping outside. “Let’s see if we can find someone worth talking to around here.” You started walking and reading the comments, trying to respond to as many as you could.

Eli Mason: You’re beautiful

 

“Aww thanks, Eli!” You responded, running into Jensen.

“Jesus, Y/N! Watch where you’re walkin’!” He snapped at you in the grumpy yet hilarious way he always did.

Eli Mason: Don’t talk to her like that.

 

“Fuck off, Jackles.” Laughing, you shoved your hand against his chest and he leaned in, wrapping an arm around you. You flipped your camera back around to selfie mode and shoved it in his face. “Say hi!”

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Jackson Imagine - Revenge

You and Jackson laughed at the movie playing on your laptop, sharing earphones. The two of you had been close friends for years and were practically inseparable.
“Hey, lovebirds! Mind keeping it down while we’re writing lyrics?” JB said to the two of you, raising his voice slightly. Both you and Jackson looked up innocently at the group’s leader and gave angelic smiles before returning your attention to the laptop once more. This elicited whispers from the other boys in the room, Jinyoung and Youngjae.
“They didn’t argue when Jaebum hyung called them lovebirds,” Youngjae said, keeping his voice low so you wouldn’t hear him.
“Do you think they finally got together?” JB asked, looking back at the two of you curled up on your sofa.
“There’s only one way to find out,” Jinyoung stated, “we need to devise a plan.”
“What, follow them around or something?” JB asked.
“Maybe. We can get the other members in on this and we’ll make sure someone is able to listen in whenever they’re alone. Or we can try and look at their texts.” Jinyoung suggested, looking to his members for approval.
“Let’s try that,” Youngjae said, “I’ll text the others now and we can get this plan started asap.”

THE NEXT DAY

Since yesterday afternoon, all of Got7 (minus Jackson of course) had devised a plan to find out if you and Jackson were together or not. Little did they know, you had been listening in to their whispered conversation and knew exactly what they were going to try and do.
“Okay, Jackson. Those members of yours are going to have constant surveillance over us and we need to retaliate.” You had a concentrated look on your face as you sat with Jackson in the cafe. Technically you were on a date but it wasn’t exactly conventional as you were planning to get some revenge on the boys for being nosy about yours and Jackson’s relationship. The two of you had decided to start dating secretly about a month ago and had gotten away with it since you were so close beforehand.
“And how do you plan to do that?” He asked, taking a sip from the coffee in front of him.
“Well I was hoping you’d have some ideas but maybe we can just act as we have done since we started dating and let them believe whatever they want. Then, we prank them by introducing someone as my boyfriend. I don’t know, what do you think?”
“We’ll do that. Who’s going to pretend to be your boyfriend though?”
“I’m friends with bts so I could ask Jimin?”
“Sure, text him to come over tomorrow to meet the boys,” he drained the coffee from his cup before asking, “now, shall we carry on with the actual date?”
“Of course,” you replied standing up, “let’s go now so we can grab popcorn before the movie starts.”

LATER THAT DAY

When you and Jackson arrived back at the dorm after your movie date at the cinema, the boys were all waiting for you.
“So, where have you two been then?” Bambam asked, a teasing tone to his voice.
“We were at the cinema, Bambam. Don’t get any ideas,” you said as you fell down onto the sofa between him and Yugyeom. “Actually, I have some news for you guys,” you started, “my boyfriend is coming over to the dorm tomorrow. You’ll know who he is, it’s Jimin from bts. Please be nice, okay?” The shocked faces from the members were priceless and you were laughing internally at the fact they believed your lie.
“(Y/N), do you want to come to my room so I can show you that movie we were talking about earlier?” Jackson asked, knowing you wanted to discuss how well the plan had gone.
“Sure,” you agreed, getting up and following him.

As you reached his bedroom, you let out a sigh of relief.
“I can’t believe that worked. Like, they actually believed us.”
“This is going great. Tomorrow, how are we going to reveal that you and Jimim aren’t actually dating?” Jackson asked, shifting in place on the bed.
“Once he leaves, I’ll come up with something on the spot. Now can we actually watch that movie?” Jackson laughed at your impatience before getting up and walking closer to you, his hands snaking around your waist. “Are you sure you don’t want to do anything else? You were getting pretty handsy in the cinema.” He pinned you against the door, his lips travelling to your neck, gently nipping at the skin.
“Jackson, what if they hear us?” You said, biting your lip so you didn’t make any noise. 
“We’ve done this before and they’ve never suspected a thing. What’s the worry now?”
“Well we don’t know they’ve never heard anything, maybe that’s why they were suspicious. But also because I did just tell them I have a boyfriend who’s not you.“
“Fine, but once this prank is over you are all mine,” Jackson said, holding your waist and pulling you into him. You slid your hands up to his neck and kissed him. Your tongues fought for dominance until you let Jackson take over. You always liked seeing his dominant side and kissing was no exception. 

After quite some time, you pulled away from the kiss to catch your breath. “Now come on, Jackson. I actually want to watch this movie.”

 THE NEXT DAY

You and Jimin had arrived at the got7 dorm about an hour ago and everything was going well. Jackson had been fairly quiet as soon as he saw you both together. Even though he knew it wasn’t real, he couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy. ‘Tonight will be fun,’ you thought to yourself as you saw the jealous look in his eyes. Whenever Jackson got jealous, he made sure you knew who your boyfriend was. While you didn’t like to make him jealous on purpose, you did enjoy the nights that followed his jealousy.
“So how did you two actually get together?” JB asked, looking at you and Jimin on the sofa. His arm was over your shoulder and you were cuddled into his chest.
“We were just hanging out one day and got talking about stuff and the next thing we know, we’re going on a date and it just escalated from there,” you told him, making sure to look at Jimin with a hopefully convincing look that you were hopelessly in love.

The rest of the day went according to plan and none of the boys suspected the lie. As Jimin was getting ready to leave, you walked him to the door.
“Thanks for doing this, Jimin,” you said in a hushed voice so the boys wouldn’t hear.
“It’s fine, I had fun. Our acting was pretty good, if I say so myself.” You giggled in response and said, “I’ll talk to you later, bye.”
“Bye, (Y/N).” Turning around, you went back into the living room to join the rest of got7.
“So what do you guys think of him?“ You asked, taking your place on the sofa.
"I’m happy for you guys, but why didn’t you tell us about him?” Jinyoung asked, looking confused.
“Because my dating life is none of your business. Sorry for being blunt but it’s true. Now, you may be disappointed to know Jimin and I aren’t dating. But that was just to get you all to stop being so nosy about whether Jackson and I are dating.” Their faces all fell as they realised they had completely fallen into your trap.
“So you heard our conversation the other day?” JB asked.
“Yes, I did. Honestly you guys are so nosy. I mean, you could have just asked us and we would have told you we’re dating,” you added as you stood up to walk over to Jackson and pull him towards his bedroom. “Now, I have a jealous boyfriend to deal with so don’t bother us for a while.” As you both walked to his room, you giggled at their stunned faces.
“I knew it!” Yugyeom shouted.
“Wear protection!” Mark added.
“We will,” Jackson replied, snaking his arm around your hip as you entered his room. 

Behind The Scenes 3 (2/???)

Author’s note: This post and the next two posts that take place in this city are going to be very short. As mentioned before, I am doing this as a way to buy time so I can completely finish BTS 3. I know I’m posting this early, but I have to because I am just going to be so busy for the next few days. One thing I want to point out is that, I am not Asian, I am not from an Asian country nor have I visited one and I’m not even from a big city in general. In advance, I’m sorry if there are details about these cities that are inaccurate. I have done my best to research these cities and countries to be as culturally and environmentally accurate as possible,but I can only get so much information with the schedule I’ve since I started writing. Sorry for any errors. 

Genre: friendship fluff?/ angst-ish  (reader x maknaes)

Word count: 1964

City: Beijing, China

Summary: It’s Jungkook’s birthday

Other parts: HERE

This is my GIF. I made it based off of this scenario series.


You felt someone gently nudge you. “Y/n… y/n…” the voice whispered. “Y/n wake up.”

In your sleepy state, you could tell that the mysterious voice was too gentle to be Rap monster’s, but it also wasn’t coming from the maknae next to you. You still didn’t take any chances and quickly sat up on command. Although you were now sitting up, your eyelids were too heavy and refused to open. “What do I have to do?” you asked.

“Shhh! Get up and come with us.” the voice instructed.

Without opening your eyes, you threw the sheets off you and stood up. A hand grabbed your wrist and you were guided to the other end of the Beijing hotel room. You didn’t open your eyes until you stubbed your toes on the end of the bathroom wall. You yelped a bit, but the voice shushed you again.

The light coming in from the bathroom was enough to help you see in the dark room. You were able to make out two bushes of hair hunched over the other bed. V and Jimin were fidgeting with what sounded like plastic bags.

“Don’t move too fast! You’re being too loud!” you were now more awake and realized it was Jimin who had woken you up and was now nagging at V.

V pulled out a cake and passed it to Jimin along with some candles and a lighter. Jimin quickly began decorating the cake.

“What is going on?” you asked.

“It’s Jungkook’s birthday, remember?” V whispered.

“Shit! I burned myself!” Jimin said in a hushed cry.

“And I’m the one being too loud!” V laughed “Here y/n” V handed you a large cookie. From its clear plastic cover, you could see it was iced to look like iron man.

Jimin turned around to you with the cake in his hands. “You and I are going to surprise Jungkook with this stuff while Tae records us all singing happy birthday.”

“How did you guys even get all this stuff?” you whispered.

V was still trying to work with the camera. “I got Hiro to order it. He dropped it off like five minutes- I got it! Let’s do this!” He exclaimed in an excited whisper.

The three of you made your way back to the bed you shared with Jungkook. “Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you~!”

Jungkook rocked back and forth, bothered by the sudden loud, off key singing.

“Happy birthday dear Jungkook~!!!” Jimin and V were practically shouting.

Jungkook was definitely awake by now and was just barely able to open his eyes.

“Happy birthday to the wonderful and cool, but very annoying being that is you~!” V squeezed in as many words as he could before you and Jimin finished singing the better-known version.

Jungkook sat up with a sleepy smile on his face. “Wow! All this for me?” he asking in his morning voice.

“Happy birthday!” V and Jimin said in unison.

“Happy birthday sweetie.” You said, attempting to sound even remotely cute.

“Aww thanks guys! Thank you, babe!” He smiled as he took notice of the camera in V’s hands. He grabbed you by your waist and pulled you to him. He turned you around and sat you on his lap. You felt his arms wrap around you and his lips planted a kiss on your temple.

“Quick! Blow out the candles! They are melting in the cake!” V shouted from behind the camera.

Jungkook stared at the tiny flames and proceeded to blow out each one individually.

“What did you wish for?” Jimin asked.

Jungkook looked at you lovingly with a big smile on his face. “Hm, I don’t want to say. I don’t want to jinx the wish!” he said shyly.

Remembering the truce, you did your best to play along with the whole couple thing despite being so tired. “Tell us!” you begged.

“Oooh, what is this?!?” Jungkook’s face lit up when he noticed the giant Iron man cookie in your hands. He took it from you and tried to take off the plastic cover.

You fake smiled at his fake cuteness. “Oh nothing, I just got a giant cookie for my-“

“Giant Kookie!” He smirked, bouncing his eyebrows up and down.

“Shut up!” you laughed.

Jimin and V brought out the extra chairs in the room and sat next to your bed. V handed you the camera and you kept it aimed at Jungkook.

“So, did you like your birthday wake-up call?”

He looked at the camera, but then hid his face by opening the cookie container. “Um yeah… But it was just a bit too early.” He smiled as he finally got the cookie open.

“Do you like your cookie and cake or do you still want something else? What other gift do you want on your special day?”

“I already have ARMY and you. Those are the only gifts I need.” He giggled.  He tore of a piece the Iron Man’s head and stared at the icing. He opened his mouth to take the bite, but then stopped himself. “Here, you try it.” He moved the cookie piece close to you.

“No, it’s yours. You eat it first.”

“Please~. I wanna see how you react to it.”

“Kookie, that’s not how this works!” you laughed. “We are the ones to see how you like it!”

“Please~!” he whined.

You rolled your eyes at him. “Fine”. You took a bite from his hand. It was good, but way too sweet for your liking.

“Is it good?”

“Uh-huh.”

“I have to make sure it was jagi-approved.” He shoved the rest of the bite into his mouth. “Wow, it’s almost as sweet as you, y/n!” He smiled.

“Eeeewww! Ah, my poor ears are hearing all this cheesiness!” Jimin squealed, but you saw his smile quickly go away. Jimin caught you staring at him and he knew you caught him looking so unamused, so quickly put his smile back on. He cut the cake and handed you each a slice.

Jungkook took the camera out of your hand and rested his chin on your shoulder. “Here we go, let ARMY see the both of us.”

“No Jungkook. I don’t have makeup!” you whined. You tried to hide your face in his neck, but he kept moving.

“Let ARMY see our beautiful bare faces!”

“No.”

“But it’s my birthday!” he pouted.

“Fine!”

Jungkook focused the camera on the both of you. “Good morning! I’m sorry, I’m still sleepy so this is going to be short, but thank you! Thank you ARMY for sticking by me through another birthday and for still supporting us. To those of you attending the concert tonight and future concerts, I am excited to see all of you! Thank you again!” His persona was serious and full of gratitude. Then he looked at you with the same expression. “And thank you y/n. You’ve stuck around for a long time and through all the bad times too… we’ve put you through a lot, but you are still here…” He half smiled.

You knew what he was saying was only for the sake of ARMY, but his words hit you hard. A part of you really wished he was being genuine. His words felt like some sort of an apology for all that you’ve gone through. Even though your pain wasn’t going to go away, at least someone, even someone like him, acknowledged you… but you knew that wasn’t the case.

“I love you.” He said sweetly.

“I love you too.”

“Ya! None of that sappy stuff again!” Jimin complained.

“Yeah! I’m going to throw up if you guys kiss!” V laughed.

“Ah, fine we won’t.” Jungkook pouted “Ok! We are going to eat now. Bye ARMY! I love you all!” He screeched.

You waved bye at the camera. “Bye ARMY.”

Jimin took the camera and he and V did a farewell of their own while you and Jungkook started eating. You were too tired to move and Jungkook was too tired to say anything, so you just stayed on his lap. No one spoke as you all ate, not till you all finished.

“What are we going to do with the rest of the cake?” Jungkook asked.

“I can go take it to Hiro and Minho. They might want it.” V suggested.

“Why didn’t the rest of the guys come and sing?” you asked.

“Because Hoseok is too fucking high to wake up right now. Yoongi is probably too hungover to deal with the singing. Namjoon and Jin… I just didn’t feel like waking them up.” Jimin said.

“Oh… well, how else are you guys going to celebrate? No offense, but this little thing wasn’t really too special…”

Jungkook reached over your thighs to grab a napkin. “Well, it’s usually like this during a tour and as long as ARMY saw something, it doesn’t really matter to me.”

“There is the concert tonight and tomorrow night.” V began. “But we are going to be here a third day cuz Namjoon has a deal to go to. We can go shopping and say it’s a late celebration!”

“Don’t you have to go with him to that deal?” Jimin reminded

“Fuck! I forgot!”

“I wish I could go.” Jungkook mumbled. “I want more money.”

“Why can’t you go?” you asked.

“Cuz of you, part of the punishment.” His tone expressed his annoyance.

“Jungkook!” Jimin hissed.

MAKNAE POV

Jimin could tell y/n got a bit upset by Jungkook’s tone.

“I’m just gonna go wash up now.” She said softly. She got up and walked into the bathroom.

“Look at what you did!” Jimin hissed again. “Stop saying shit like that, it reminds her of that night!” He made sure to keep his voice low so that Y/n couldn’t hear him.

“It’s not like I meant it that way!” Jungkook said, keeping his voice low as well.

“She deals with a lot already! Besides, you should be happy you aren’t going on the deals anymore. Those things are fucking dangerous. Last time Tae was almost shot!… Why do you keep going to those things?!?” Jimin’s attention was now on V.

“Don’t get mad at us! You go on them too!”  V shot back.

“Yeah, but that’s only sometimes and it’s because I’m forced to go! You guys go voluntarily!”

V was about to speak, but Jungkook cut him off. “There is nothing wrong with us making more money! We get that you don’t fucking like Namjoon, but what he does for us and let us do isn’t that bad!”

“Not that bad? Not that bad?!? What we do is wrong and we all know it! Is all the shit he’s done to us not that bad?!? I fucking hate what I have to go through!” Jimin said angrily. “What about the shit he’s done to you? You still stick by his side after what he did, or did you forget?!?”

Although their tempers were growing, they kept their voices low enough so y/n still couldn’t hear them from the restroom.

“Of course I haven’t forgotten! How the fuck can I forget something like that?!? But Namjoon had a fucking point and I fucking got over it! And don’t put yourself on a high horse just cuz things are “good” between you and y/n. You are a big reason that she went through a lot of shit!” Jungkook shot up from the bed. He grabbed his jacket and began slipping on his shoes.

“Where are you going?” V asked.

“I need some air!” Jungkook said as he walked out of the hotel room.

“Did you really have to bring that up Jimin?” V asked disappointingly.

“Shut up!” Jimin knew he crossed the line and he already felt extremely guilty about what he said.

Y/n stepped out of the bathroom and Jimin rushed in before V could start lecturing him.

Only Fools - pt 6

Originally posted by jungkooz

He was at your house way earlier than you expected.

“Hi Y/N.” He said, standing at the door nervously.

“Hey! You’re here, come in.” You ran upstairs and grabbed the giant stuffed bunny on your bed.

“This is what you have to bring back to Jungkook for me.” You said as you walked down the stairs, not being able to see him or the stairs.

Namjoon ran up the stairs to meet you and took the stuffed animal from your hands.

“You need to be careful Y/N, you could get hurt.” He said seriously, setting the gift on the couch. Hearing him say that again made you laugh at his seriousness.

“I’m going to stuff if in here.” You said cheerfully, pulling out a small suitcase from a nearby closet.

Wrestling the gigantic bunny into the suitcase was amusing for him. When you closed it, the heavy plastic caught your finger.

“Ouch! Stupid suitcase.” You complained but Namjoon ran over to you and inspected your finger. Without a word, he held your hand out and walked you over to the kitchen. Still holding your hand as he ran cold water over your sore finger, you looked up at him in wonder.

His face showed real concern and his lips pursed out a little. All you felt was confusion. Before, when you tried to hold him back from leaving the other day, he distanced himself. Now he had no problem being this close to you.

“I’m okay now.” You finally said. Namjoon let go of your hand, embarrassed. He cleared his throat and straightened up.

“Do you want to go get something to eat?” He asked, much to your surprise.

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Auston Matthews #1.3

This the part 3 of the multi-chaptered Auston drabble, as requested by many of you. :) Part 1, part 2, part 4, part 5.

Word count:910

“Aren’t you the lucky charm?” Your friend giggled as she pulled you to only Big Brother knows where.

“No.” You said, dragging your feet behind her, “where are we going?”

“Remember when Auston said later?” She stopped and looked at you, “this is later.”

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so hello from the other side

fic for flarrow femslash week. day 1: favorite pairing | nyssara.

the five times sara called nyssa to say “hey, what’s up? i’m alive!”

“Um, hi. It turns out the phone company will reinstate your contract if you come back to life.”

Sara notes a piece of especially interesting gum on the sidewalk. It’s blue-raspberry colored, which is unusual. Usually, blue-raspberry gum is chewed into a flavorless white before it’s spit out.

Is she still recording? Crap. Yes.

“That was a joke. I mean, it’s not a joke, it actually happened. And I guess your phone still works, because I can leave you a voicemail, and your answering message is still the same, so. You know. Hey. I said hi already. This is stupid.”

She pokes the gum with the toe of her sneaker. And now there’s gum on her shoe. Outstanding.

“I just thought I’d call you and tell you I’m around. Well. I moved. But you can travel pretty much anywhere, despite being on like, 17 no-fly lists, so if you want to meet up, text me or something. I don’t know. I’m mostly free. Bye.”

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Youngjae Imagine - Close Connections

A/N - I really enjoyed doing this one so I hope you guys liked it and thanks to the anon who requested!

“Can I sit there please?” A voice called, making you look up from your laptop screen. Before you stood a guy about your age holding a cup of coffee. “There aren’t any seats anywhere else,” he added, giving you a warm smile.

“Sure, go ahead,” you replied, returning the smile. ‘Damn he’s cute’ you thought to yourself.
“Haha, why thank you.” Crap. He heard. “For the record, I think you’re pretty cute too.”
You blushed at his comment as you carried on typing on your laptop, taking small sips of your coffee. Every now and then you’d look up to see him looking at you and when he realised you had noticed him, he would blush and look away.

After about half an hour, you stood up and got ready to leave, needing to head back into work. As you pulled on your jacket, you turned to the guy still sitting at the table and said, “hey, I have to get back to work now but it was nice meeting you.”
“You to. I’m Youngjae by the way.”
“(Y/N). Bye, Youngjae,” you smiled at him and left the cafe, glancing behind you to look at the boy once more. His gaze met yours and he smiled again, leaving you a little bit flustered. How did he have such a gorgeous smile?! Luckily, the walk to work was only 10 minutes so you didn’t have to worry about being late. Your job was to be a songwriter and work with many artists, helping them to create their music. You absolutely loved the job and felt so fortunate to work with so many great people. As you walked into the studio, you were met with a very professional looking man. 
“Afternoon Miss, I’m a representative for JYP Entertainment. We’ve been looking around for songwriters to work with our group Got7 and were hoping you’d be interested. You have a very notable repertoire.”
“Thank you, I’d love to work with them. I’m available next week, if that fits their schedule.”
“Perfect, they’ll arrive here on Monday morning for the first writing session. They’ll be with their manager as well,” he said as he prepared to leave the studio.
“Great, I look forward to working with them,” you answered, trying to conceal your excitement.

You had heard of Got7 and knew some of their songs but had no clue what any of them looked like. All you knew was that they had achieved so much success worldwide and would be amazing people to work with. Wanting to know more about them and their style, you opened up youtube on your computer and began to listen to their stuff. As you watched the videos, you noticed one of the members looked really familiar. 
“Oh my god,” you murmured to yourself, putting your hand over your mouth. The guy you had been sat with, Youngjae, was a member of Got7. World famous kpop group. Your stomach felt like it was filled with butterflies at the thought of writing songs with him on Monday. Shaking your head, you tried to stop freaking out and started thinking of some ideas for songs.

A FEW DAYS LATER

Monday was here and you had been in the studio for an hour, finalising some details and making sure all the lyrics you had written were up to standard. You had also been composing a demo that you were considering playing to Got7. All you needed were some vocals which you could easily record before they arrived. As you stood in the recording booth and sang the demo, the 7 boys walked in with their manager. Glancing up, you noticed them and motioned that you’d be out in a minute. Once the final chords of the song played, you removed your headphones and walked to greet them all.
“Hi guys, I’m (Y/N). Nice to meet you all!” They all responded as enthusiastically as you and the leader, whose name you had learnt to be JB, spoke first. “Shall we get writing then?” He asked, pulling out a notebook.
“Of course!”

After a few hours had passed and so you decided to call for a lunch break. Five of the members all left to go grab some food, leaving you, JB and Youngjae behind; the three of you were determined to finish the last few bars of the song. Once you were done and happy with the result, you asked Youngjae to get some coffee with you at the cafe you had first met. Walking there, a comfortable silence hung over you both as you strolled along the pavement.
“So, you never told me you were a singer,” you said, breaking the ice.
“And you never said you wrote music,” he challenged, giving you a side glance.
“Touché.”

When you both arrived at the cafe, you each ordered your drinks and some food before sitting down at the same table you had sat at before. Conversation flowed so easily between the two of you and the time passed by so quickly. Before you knew it, Youngjae received an angry text from JB saying you were late and asking where the hell you were. Sprinting back to the studio, your faces were tinted pink in embarrassment for being late.
“So, what were you two up to?” Jackson asked, wiggling his eyebrows.
“We were just getting coffee, Jackson, nothing else,” you retorted, rolling your eyes teasingly at him. “Anyway, shall we record some vocals for this song?”

Evening hit and you and the boys finished the last little bits in the studio before going home. The writing session had gone well and the vocals were sounding good which you were ecstatic about. Usually it took you at least 3 sessions to get a song written exactly the way you wanted so you were impressed with how well you worked on it.
“Shall we call it a day here?” You asked the now tired members who nodded in agreement, clearly wanting to go home and sleep.
“That was a good writing session, mind if we come again tomorrow?” JB asked as he helped you collect all of the music sheets together. “Also, if you go on another lunch date with Youngjae tomorrow, try not to be late,” he added, whispering so the others didn’t overhear.
“It wasn’t a date!” You whisper-shouted as you glanced towards Youngjae, making sure he hadn’t heard.
“Sure, I believe that as much as I believe that Bambam can sing.”
“Then Bambam must have a very good voice,” you responded, sticking your tongue out at him. You walked over to Youngjae to say goodbye to him when all of a sudden you felt your nerves come over you. Trying to ignore the fluttery feeling in your stomach, you went up to him.
“Hey Youngjae, thanks for coming with me to grab coffee earlier. Sorry I made you late too.”
“It’s okay, we both got a little carried away,” he said, laughing.
“Yeah, I had fun though.”
“Maybe we should meet up again?” He asked you, looking almost as nervous as you felt.
“I’d love to,” you said, smiling shyly at him before exchanging phone numbers.

For anon 

More Than You Know

If you went around telling people that you were Lee Joon Kyung’s wife they probably wouldn’t care much, but if you used his other name you were sure they would flip out. That’s right you were married to the one and only Dok2 or as you liked to call him, lover boy.

It had been about three days since your wedding and Dok2 was already frustrated. Due to certain weather conditions and work issues the two of you weren’t able to go on your honeymoon, he knew you were disappointed no matter how much you said you weren’t. The worst part about all of this was the two of you hadn’t consummated your marriage yet. 

Before the two of you had even started dating you had told Dok2 about your “no sex before marriage” rule which he understood. One of the many things you loved about him, he never forced you to do anything you were uncomfortable with. However it seemed that he was abiding by the rule even after marriage. 

“Hey lover boy” you said over the phone “when are you coming home?” You plopped yourself down on the couch as you waited for him to respond. 

“Hey baby~ I’m not coming home tonight but rather you are coming out” Dok2 said as you frowned in response not knowing exactly where he was going with this “I’ll be sending a car to pick you up in about an hour so get ready” you weren’t sure what he was up to but if he wanted to pamper you then you weren’t going to say no. 

“I don’t know what you’re up to but ok~” you said in a gleeful voice as a smile was spread across your face in anticipation. 

“Oh and babe” Dok2 said as you responded with a simple yeah "wear something sexy" you bit your lower lip before you both cut the call. You jumped off the couch and ran to get dressed, Dok2 should know by now that an hour is simply not enough. 

—–

He was grinning like a kid with a new toy as he set the phone down on the table and wrapped up whatever he was doing. Of course his smile couldn’t go unnoticed by the other males in the room. 

“Someone’s very happy after talking to their wife” Beenzino said as Dok2 just grinned and brushed it off. 

“So this is what it’s like to be married, only three days into it and he’s already dumping us to go see her” Jay Park said as the other guys agreed “not that I blame him” Dok2 laughed as turned around in his chair and told them all to shut up. 

“I’m taking her out, I feel bad that we had to cancel our honeymoon and cause of this problem at the studio I haven’t really been able to see her” Dok2 said as the guys let out a unison aww “you guys don’t know but not being able to properly see her for three days is like a lifetime in marriage” they laughed at little since they had never seen their friend act like this before. 

“Marriage has changed you Joon and probably for the better” The Quiett said as he patted Dok2 on the back “also, tell y/n to come by the office sometime, seeing her beats seeing you any day” they all burst out laughing as Dok2 shoved them. 

“I’ll relay the message to her but I gotta go now” He said bye to the guys as they continued to tease him a little but he just ignored it with a smile. He couldn’t care less since he was going to see you soon. 

—–

Considering Dok2 gave you absolutely no hint as to where you were going you were a little confused on what to wear. You decided to wear a short black dress seeing as how it was your safest choice. Since he told you to were something sexy you chose a black dress that reached mid thigh and was off shoulder, it was form fitting and you were sure he was gonna love it. 

Hoping that tonight was going to go somewhere you picked your lingerie very carefully. Before the wedding you had bought a lacy red strapless bra and underwear set, you knew how much Dok2 loved seeing you in red and what guy doesn’t love seeing his woman in lace. 

Simple makeup, a pair of black heels, a clutch and you were ready to go and not a minute too soon as the driver Dok2 sent drove up the driveway. 

—–

Dok2 got the hotel way before you did to set up everything. He had booked a room with a view of the whole city, there were roses and champagne, music and candles and a very eager Dok2. He wanted tonight to be special, he wanted to not only tell you how much he loved you but also show you. 

A knock on the door drew him out from his thoughts as he looked in the mirror before quickly running to open the door. As he flung it open he was greeted by your beautiful form, a smile was soon spread across both your faces as you lay eyes on each other. Before he could even take in your appearance you jumped into his arms as he picked you up and spun you around. 

“Hey baby” Dok2 cooed as he gently let you down and pecked your lips. His hands rested on your hips as yours ran down from his neck to his chest. 

“Hey lover boy, did you wait long?” You asked whilst his hands seemed to be a little frisky tonight as they ran up and down your body. 

“Depends” Dok2 said as he shrugged his shoulders “are you asking about tonight or you know the other thing?” You obviously knew what he was referring to as you playfully hit his chest and moved out of his arms. You weren’t able to walk far as he caught you in a back hug and nuzzled his face up into your neck. 

You both giggled in pure glee as you rested your hands on top of his while he swayed your bodies from side to side. You felt him place a soft kiss on your neck as the kisses peppered themselves down your neck and across your shoulder. You loved the feelings it gave you, you loved the feelings he was giving you but Dok2 stopped and turned you around in his arms. He gave you a genuine smile and pecked your lips once again. 

“You look beautiful tonight y/n” Dok2 said as he rested his forehead against yours. 

“Just beautiful? I wore this dress because I thought you’d think it was sexy” you said to entice him a little, you always did enjoy doing this to him. 

“Baby you look beautiful and sexy in that dress, but do you know what you’d look better in?” Dok2 asked slyly as you moved your head away from his to get a clearer look of his face. 

“What?” You asked as you wrapped your arms around his neck and moved closer to him. 

“Nothing” Dok2 had this sly smile on his face as the words slipped out of his mouth, you blushed, not a little bit a lot which even a person ten miles away would be able to notice. 

“Joonie stop joking around~” you said shyly as you moved away from his warm embrace and walked deeper into the suite. 

“Oh baby you have no idea how serious I am” Dok2 mumbled under his breath before following you into the seating area of the suite. 

There was a huge smile plastered onto your face as you finally got to see what Dok2 had been up to for the past hour. Candles and rose petals were all over the room, a bottle of champagne along with a beautiful dinner for two, romantic music and a magnificent view of the city. 

“Do you like it?” Dok2 asked as he came up behind you and took your hand in his, he laced his fingers with yours before bringing your hand up to his mouth and placing a kiss on it. 

“I love it Joon, it’s absolutely amazing” you said placing a kiss on his cheek. 

“I’m glad you like because this is my way of making it up to you, I know that our honeymoon was cancelled due to the bad weather and also how I’ve been busy because of that issue at the studio and I felt really bad, like I had been neglecting you” Dok2 said in somewhat low and softer voice. 

You moved around to stand in front of his as you took his other hand in yours and smiled. 

“Thank you Joonie, I know you’ve been busy and stressed out lately, I can’t say I wasn’t disappointed with our honeymoon being cancelled and all but right now I couldn’t be happier” you pecked his lips as he placed your hands around his neck while his instinctively fell onto your hips. 

“I love you so much baby” Dok2 said as his face grew closer to yours. 

“I love you too lover boy” you said as you both smiled before his lips were on yours, but this time it wasn’t just a peck. Although his lips were ever so familiar with yours they treaded carefully. Slow and sensual were the words to describe it as his lips seemed to melt against yours. 

However the mood was interrupted by the sounds that were erupting from your stomach. Dok2 grinned against your lips whist your cheeks were burning in embarrassment. You pulled away from him and playfully pushed him away as he teased you in the most loving way possible. 

“Aww~ is my baby hungry? Why didn’t you tell me sooner” Dok2 cooed as he wrapped you up in his arms and kissed your head. 

“Whatever let’s just eat” you said in an attempt to save yourself from embarrassment. 

—–

The night continued on as you and Dok2 ate and laughed over stories you were telling each other. In the back of your mind you were sure that your body was trying to sabotage the night as you somehow managed to spill food on your dress. It wasn’t a big stain but you obviously couldn’t wear it. 

“I didn’t know I married such a klutz, you’re stealing my role of being the clumsy and dorky one” Dok2 managed to blurt out his words after laughing at the little you incident you had. You liked that about your relationship with him, it was never superficial. 

“Yeah well I’m not the one who tripped over his own shoelaces or put my underwear on backwards or-" 

"Ok ok I get it just go to the bathroom” you smiled and walked away feeling victorious, there was no way you could ever be a bigger klutz than him. You closed the bathroom door and quickly stripped out your dress. The stain was actually bigger than you thought and if you didn’t remove it now you knew you’d never be able to get it out. 

By mistake you ended up wetting the whole dress, well you couldn’t wear it now even if you wanted to. You mentally abused yourself-how am I gonna go out now?! I can’t go out in just my underwear!!

You noticed a robe folded and kept on a shelf near the shower and you sighed internally. You hung your dress up and quickly slipped on the robe. Giving yourself a glance in the mirror you opened the bathroom door and walked out, you looked around and saw your husband just standing there looking out the window. 

So lost in his own thoughts, Dok2 didn’t even realize you were walking towards him. You thought about scaring him at first but then you scraped the thought and wrapped your arms around him instead. You couldn’t see but he had a warm smile on his face as he placed his hands on yours. 

“What’re you thinking about?” He was playing with the ring on your finger whilst your chin rested on his shoulder. 

“I was thinking about my wife and how beautiful she is” Dok2 said before he slipped out of your embrace and turned around to look at you. Damn it y/n!! I really wanna get you out of that robe! 

You always were such a sweet talker” you placed your hands on his chest, your voice pulling him out from his thoughts as he just gazed at you. Why are you looking at me like that? Lee Joon Kyung don’t think I don’t know what you’re thinking. 

He gave you look as if to say and what am I thinking?

Your response to him was a peck on the lips; your lips remained only a mere few inches away from his. His hands ran up your hips and travelled around to grab your ass cheeks as he gave them a squeeze. You giggled and whacked his chest while he just looked at you with a smirk on his face. The way he was looking at you gave you a feeling of confidence, one that you hadn’t felt before. 

You moved his hands away from your body and instead slipped your hands into his. He didn’t question you one bit and just went along with whatever it was you were doing. A smirk soon dominated your face as you began walking backwards towards the bed; his one hand was in yours as the other was tucked away in his pocket. 

All movement stopped once you reached the edge of the bed, you moved your hand away from his and reached up to unbutton his shirt. He didn’t stop you or even utter a word; all he did was watch you, his beautiful wife, slowly undressing him. He loved your confidence, he thought it was sexy and he definitely didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable or stop. 

As you unbuttoned the last of his buttons you looked up to find him staring at you, still he didn’t utter a word. His eyes kept contact with yours as he slid his shirt off his shoulders, down his arms and onto the floor. The look he gave you was don’t stop, keep going-and that’s exactly what you did. 

You placed your hands on his shoulders and slowly ran them down his bare torso till they reached the hem of his pants. You don’t know how but you managed to unbuckle his belt as you pulled the long strip of leather out of his belt hoops and dropped it to the floor. Once again you looked up at him to find that his eyes were still fixated on you. 

His gazed faltered for a moment as he looked at the knot that held your robe together. As his gaze met yours again you nodded-you can untie it. 

Almost instantly his hands reached up towards your waist as he pulled the knot undone and loosened the robe. Allowing it to slowly open, you took a deep breath before allowing the white and thick material to fall to the floor. 

Fuck” it was almost a whisper but you managed to hear it, that was the only word Dok2 could manage to fester up as he laid eyes on your almost naked body. The red lace wasn’t helping Dok2 at all but he loved every bit of it. 

“What? Why do you keep staring at me like that?” You asked finally breaking the silence that was lingering between you two. 

“Because I can’t believe just how fucking sexy and beautiful you are” his eyes ran up and down your body in the most flattering way possible “it’s almost hard to believe that you’re my wife and that for the rest of our lives I’m the only man who’ll ever get to see you like this” you weren’t exactly sure what response to give him so you just stood there till his eyes met yours again. 

He moved closer to you, his bare torso almost touching yours. There was another moment of silence before his lips met yours, speaking to you louder and clearer than any other words you’ve ever heard. He pushed you back onto the bed, his one arm around your waist while the other rested near your head holding up his weight. Your hands cupped his cheeks, his tongue pushing past your soft lips to pleasantly invade your sweet and wet cavern. 

You couldn’t help but moan into the kiss; Dok2 had always been an amazing kisser but tonight just took the cake. Moving his arm from around you, Dok2 took your hands in his and laced your fingers together placing your hands above your head. 

He was literally sucking the breath out of your lungs and you loved every bit of it. He knew you were running short on air but he still kept kissing you like tomorrow would never come. It was only when you squeezed his hands so hard that your nails dug through his skin did he pull away from the kiss. 

Completely and utterly breathless you lay there beneath him and so far he had only kissed you. He gave you no more than ten seconds to catch your breath before you felt his lips on your skin. Your neck was what he targeted next, he loved kissing and biting your neck, you remember all your make out sessions with him led to countless hickeys. Dok2 was a lot more possessive than people thought, not that you minded. 

Another moan slipped past your suppliant lips as he caught a piece of your flesh between his teeth before sucking on it. Tonight you knew he was going to cover you in love bites and let the whole world know that you’re his wife. 

His hands left yours to run down your body and cup your breasts. Your hands were on the nape of his neck as his lips tortured your neck while his hands simultaneously massaged your breasts passionately. He was making your body feel all sorts of sensations at one time, a feeling you never thought possible. 

His hands moved from your two wonders to your back as he tried to unhook your bra, which took him a second leaving you somewhat shocked. 

“And how many bras have you unhooked exactly?” You asked raising your eyebrow as you looked at him suspiciously. 

“All you need to know is that yours is the last I’ll ever unhook” he had this smirk on his face that was dangerously addictive, you were at a loss for words, he really was a sweet talker. 

“Trying to sweet talk your way out of trouble, again" he yanked your bra away from your chest and threw it across the room, suddenly you felt very exposed but at the same time very loved. 

"That wasn’t sweet talk baby, that was the plain and honest truth” those were his last words before his face was buried in your chest, sucking and biting your innocent nipples, giving you a weird but satisfying sensation. You fisted the sheets and threw your head back in pleasure as he violently devoured your nipples. 

When he pulled away you felt your nipple harden due to the cold and thump with pleasurable pain. He had bruised your nipples and breasts, nothing you weren’t expecting from him. 

Then down went his lips, from your chest, to your abdomen, to your hips and finally to the hem of your underwear. He caught the material between his teeth and pulled back before letting go and allowing it to snap against your skin. It wasn’t exactly painful but the feeling wasn’t one you’d want to feel again. It was only then that he noticed that you were dripping to the core. 

He liked what he saw and wasted no time in yanking your underwear down your legs and into the pile of clothes on the floor. 

“You’re so fucking sexy it’s unbelievable” his words made you feel undeniably sexy as they made your core drip more and more “and I love you so damn much!” He spread your legs and placed long slow kisses on your thighs. You were already moaning in anticipation as his mouth inched closer and closer to your untouched womanhood. 

The feeling was one you couldn’t describe, the feathery effect it had on your stomach, the intense pleasure it brought to your core, all that from his wet muscle tasting you in ways no man ever has or ever will. Definitely the feeling was one you enjoyed but couldn’t describe, that’s how amazing it felt. 

You instinctively rolled your hips against his mouth, wanting him to taste more of you. He didn’t mind though, he loved that he could make you feel this way. However you began crying out his name in pure frustration and ecstasy when you felt two digits surge into you while he mercilessly sucked on your clit. 

Dok2 no I can’t-ahh~ I c-can’t hold on. Your words were breathless and you know you won’t be able to fathom a proper sentence after that one. You thought he would stop, you thought he’s stop because he’d want you to come with him on your first night but that wasn’t his intentions at all. He had added a third digit, his fingers and tongue pulling you into a whole new world. 

Your whole body froze, your hands fisting the sheets, your back arching off the bed and your head thrown back as every muscle in your body was bombed with pleasure. Pulling his fingers out from you, Dok2 sat up as your juices dripped off his chin. He hovered above you once again as you cupped his cheeks and pulled him down till his face was an inch or two away from yours. 

“You’re so beautiful baby” Dok2 whispered in a voice audible to only the two of you. You smiled and wiped up your release from his chin before pressing your lips against his. As he kissed you, you felt his erection poking at your thigh and realized that he still had his underwear on. 

Almost as if he could read your mind, Dok2 pulled away from you to stand up and strip out of his briefs. That single moment without his body heat made you feel so exposed and so vulnerable. 

In a second he was back on top of you and as you looked down at his very erect member you wondered how he had managed to control himself for so long. His tip brushed against your entrance as you hushed out a moan. His hands went around your waist as yours rested on his shoulders. Inch by inch his length filled you up as your nails dug into his shoulders, he whispered into your ear in an attempt to null the pain. 

Once he was fully in he gave you a moment to breath before slowly thrusting into you. Going slow wasn’t something that stuck well with Dok2; you learnt that tonight as his thrusts suddenly turned beastly. Your nails bore red marks down his back, ones that would leave marks for weeks not that either of you cared in that moment. 

“I love you so much baby that I’m going to make you come for the second time tonight” those were his words to you as your stomach began to knot up, a familiar feeling to the one to felt before. Hold it baby, hold it and come with me! And that’s exactly what you did, you held onto it for as long as you could before you finally come with him.

Your whole body felt like mush, Dok2 on the other hand continued to ride out both your orgasm before crashing down on you. Your sticky and sweaty bodies stuck together but this was a moment you wouldn’t want to share with anyone but him. He buried his face into your neck, enjoying your musky scent, something he always did; you thought it was weird but your husband was nothing less than strange. 

You felt him pepper your neck with kisses making you giggle and to the sound of your voice he smiled. He pulled his now limp member out from you as he rolled over, pulling you with him so that you could lay on top of him. You rested your chin on your hands that lay on his chest, he was busy tucking your hair behind your ears. 

“Joonie I’m cold” you said as he smiled before somehow managing to pull the blanket over both of you without even sitting up. 

“Better?” He asked as you lazily nodded with a smile. You moved up closer so that you could place a kiss on his chin while his hands ran up and down your back, he knew how much your loved that. It become somewhat of a habit for him, he would run his fingers over your back when you were sleeping or cuddled up in his arms or even if you were just talking. 

“I’m going to fall asleep if you keep running your fingers on my back like that” you mumbled as he looked down at you and smiled. He placed a long kiss on your forehead and you knew what he meant to say with that: sleep, I’ll be here when you wake up in the morning. 

You closed your eyes and sleepily mumbled an ‘I love you’ making him smile like a little kid. I love you too baby, a lot more than you could ever imagine. His words were soft, like a whisper, as his fingers continued to run up and down the soft skin of your back till he too eventually fell asleep with you securely in his arms.