now people think im too feminine or something

You know what I think about this a lot, but am I the only one that’s actually made pretty uncomfortable by the idea that romantic/sexual attraction is what gender you’re attracted to?

I understand why that was changed from sex, because that was problematic in itself

But I don’t feel like gender is a better term either because that’s presuming that you can somehow see and determine gender when?? It’s one of the most volatile, indistinguishable and intangible things on the planet?? How in the hell are you attracted to gender?? What is gender?? Where is it???

idk maybe it’s just cause i’m non-binary (and quite clearly straight men and non-straight women arent attracted to me bc of my gender) so I suppose it affects me more directly, or rather I have more reason to question it…. who knows