now i am gonna shut up

2

blaire: sooooo alek, you gonna finish that? 

alex: yeah claire i am, you should probably slow down anyway

blaire: WHY WOULD I?? IM A FREE WO-WOMAN NOW!

alex: chill, just..take it i can make another 

blaire : oh my god you’re so sweet thank you so much lil elf bby

alex: im taller than you.. 

blaire: barellllyyyyyyy and you’ve got those weird ass ears sooo

alex: ….shut up claire.

i kinda need a fic where Noora takes Isak and Even to her yoga class and Isak is actually really good at it and enjoys it and Even is all like “I’m to tall for this shit, the earth seems too far I am an artist goddamit, downward dog yourself hoe, nope I am never doing this again ever”

Okay so I found my dead grandfather’s journal from 56 years ago. This is some old stuff, okay, and I was like yeah I’m gonna read a page or two. 

Basically he wrote down this road trip he did with a friend of his (name is Giulio) but at some point it gets so weird.

I’ll try my best to translate it from italian to english (english is not my first language) and well, I’m also having a hard time trying to read my gandpa’s writing cause he wrote like a drunk snail.

Now, beware, my grandfather was an italian man dedicated to work, church, work and work, who believed in the traditional family and all that Jazz. But at some point I reach this part where he writes: “yesterday me and Giulio slept in the same tent as mine was stolen at the gas station. As it was really cold, we slept close. In the middle of the night I realized that the warmth next to me did not belong to my Nadia (his fiancé at the time, my grandmother). It was the most intense feeling I’ve ever felt”.

And I was like allright that’s some weird no homo bullshit but who cares.

BUT THEN IT JUST GETS WORSE.

“I was having a cigarette whilst Giulio was asleep in the car, having a nap before we hit the road again. In the midst of the smoke of my tobacco, I saw his face and thought that the woman who is going to marry him will be lucky”.

Grandpa, what the hell? 

BUT OH NO IT JUST GETS BETTER.

“We shared a bed. Old motel did not have spare rooms, it was awkward at first. Then I started thinking that the warmth of Giulio’s body is somehow becoming more familiar to me then Nadia’s.”

Now, I have like seventy more pages of this goddamn journal but I am pretty fucking sure my gandfather had the worst crush over his best friend.


The complete post X

  • cassian in rogue one novel, every five minutes:
  • is jyn cold? i think she needs medical help. JYN? WHERE ARE YOU JYN? JYN. DON’T DO THAT, JYN PLEASE. SHE'S GONNA GET HERSELF KILLED. why am i thinking about her so much this doesn’t make Sense, i don’t... understand. BECAUSE *I DON’T* LIKE HER AT ALL. i also don’t need her now, she’s expendable. *shouts* WHERE’S JYN? [shut up cassian don’t show any weakness] *feels rage* WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO HER? SHIT SHE MIGHT END UP KILLING ME... why can’t i leave her behind?.... i should just leave her behind, right? because that’s a good idea. BUT I NEED TO SAVE HER. stop thinking about her, cassian. hey jyn. J Y N.
The signs as stuff people in my creative writing class have said
  • Aries: "God bless A-FUCKING-merica."
  • Taurus: "Turn off the music, Mae, we're trying to pray to Steve Bushemi."
  • Gemini: "Hey, here's a new rule: shut up."
  • Cancer: "I'm gonna go rescue that bird."
  • Leo: "I'm always a slut for being a slut."
  • Virgo: "No swearing in my classroom."
  • Libra: "Marshall is triggered by pasta."
  • Scorpio: "Who else likes to sodomize Jesus?"
  • Sagittarius: "How am I going to get into the NFL now?"
  • Capricorn: "I HATE 13th century France."
  • Aquarius: "Don't kinkshame Emily Dickinson; she's not here to defend herself."
  • Pisces: "We can't scream while Sarah's here."

Game Grumps — Inside  {Sentence Starters}

{ contains swearing & triggers }

  • “Am I gonna die?”
  • “Shut up. Throw me!”
  • “I wish I could be like a bird.”
  • “Yeah, that broke my pelvis.”
  • “I’m surrounded by assholes.” 
  • “All you people are fucked up.”
  • “Soft, delightful landing of dead pigs.”
  • “I wonder if I have, like, superpowers?”
  • “Oh, shit! Many dogs! MANY DOGS!”
  • “Oh, I love that you can trample people.”
  • “I look like the King of bullshit right now…”
  • “I’ll gladly take the sweet embrace of death.”
  • “FREEDOM! Horrible, horrible FREEDOM!”
  • “There’s nothing that can stop me but objects.”
  • “Ok, I’ll flip you guys the Bird from a distance.”
  • “I hope someone takes my words out of context.”
  • “You can never have too many delicious children.” 
  • “The world is full of horrifying and adorable things.” 
  • “I want to be over there with those fucking dead people.”
  • “I’m filled with a sense of wonder… and fucking mild terror.”
  • “You had the right idea, but the wrong execution… and idea.”
  • “We’re just a little kid running from dudes…and they’re bad.”
  • “Let’s get them into an elevator and start using them for shit.”
  • “Just gonna live out my life partying and occasionally eating chicks.” 

At times I get really down about my height and build—being 6 foot 3 and all—feeling that I can never truly be the girl I feel I am inside. When this thought plagues my mind, I do my best to keep telling myself “Girl, you’re gonna be the best goddamn Samus ever. Now shut the hell up and be your pretty self!” and after that, I start to feel a little bit better about myself.

10

Cisco Ramon and Ray Palmer being absolute nerds (.❂‿❂.)

Jackson and I helped with some catering event for military families and a bunch of girls were like hitting on jackson with “hey. Hey. Hey. Im 18. So like, im legal now.”

And then her friend goes “oh my god, shut up Kara, you turn 17 like next month.”

And she is all “he didnt know that until you opened your fat mouth”

And i am just sitting there dissapointed in humanity as i look at teenagers who are trying so hard to be statutory rape “victims”. It isnt like Jackson was gonna do anything, but still.

Do not lie about your age, teenagers. Do not buy fake IDs, do not sneak into 18+ places, do not ask adults for sex. You will get someone in so much trouble with that stuff.

-yuki

Bow Before the King

Description: You get creative while trying to get information from Crowley

Pairing: Crowley x Reader

Warnings: some smutty stuff ;)

Originally posted by supernaturally-wwe-imagines

You walked down to the dungeon behind the boys. Crowley had information, and you needed it. Sam opened up the shelves and walked in.

“Hello, boys. Ah, and if it isn’t my little darling behind them.”

Dean barely looked up. “Shut up.”

“What? Jealous of her pet name, squirrel?”

You rolled your eyes. “More like I’m not your darling, or whatever. Now are you ready to give up any info, or are you gonna keep sulking?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe I am. For a price.” Of course.

Keep reading

Am currently a little emotional and just like blown away by how much you guys loved The Mean Marquis, like I worked on it for so long and wanted to make sure I did a good job and you guys liked it so much and that I just makes me so happy and I’m gonna shut up now

4

“Now, where are those pesky members of the hamon tribe…?”

((Oh man oh man guys this fusion event seems SUPER NEATO~ I’m not tagging myself into it, because I think I’m bending the rules a bit, but it seems super fun and you should check it out if you haven’t <3))
((In the meantime, I’m kicking my fun off with some PILLARMAN FUSIONS, oh my. Will there be more fusions tomorrow? PROBABLY~))

8

MerDer Season 10


Derek: (holding up ties) What do you think? The blue or the burgundy?
Meredith: The blue makes you look too handsome. You don’t want the president to be distracted by those piercing blue eyes.
Derek: Oh, you want me to get the job.
Meredith: I want neurosurgeon Dr. Shepherd to get the job. I don’t want my husband Dr. Shepherd to get the job.
Derek: That’s complicated.
Meredith: Yes, well, I’m complicated. I’m gonna take a shower now.
Derek: So am I.
Meredith: No.
Derek: It’s been three weeks.
Meredith: You went back on your promise. I can’t sleep with a man who’s a lying liar.
Derek: What if I put on the blue tie?
Meredith: Nope. (shuts bathroom door)
Derek: You’re having fun. You delight in my pain.
Meredith: I just took off my robe. Now I’m soaping myself up.
Derek: (chuckles) Oh, my goodness.