nothing to do with the work i should be doing right about now

INTJ & INFJ - episode 16 (ft. ISFJ)

ISFJ: Instead of being so existential, you should do like I do. I make my action meaningful to me. I wake up thinking about what I have to get done today, working on my benefit.

INFJ: Well, nihilism kinda proposes that nothing has an inherent meaning. That everything is constructed, because we can’t handle a meaningless existence, so your actions cou-

ISFJ: I really don’t want to be mean, but I so do not want a Philosophy class right now.

INFJ: Got it.

INTJ: Oh, no. I wanted to know where that was leading!

Dear Charlie,

Sometimes I try to put myself out there and do better, and then I mess up. Sometimes I break out of my shell to be more social and I mess up. I try not to make people mad and I just mess up. I forget things all the time and do my best to remember and I mess that up. I work towards being positive and still end up messing up. I’m at a point where nothing I do is right and I know it’s part of being human. But why does it feel like all I do is mess up? I should just get a diary but I felt like writing about it. I’m not in the best place right now and I’m just tired of being tired. I just want to be someone people are proud to know. Someone who just knows what to do and knows what it takes to get further. Someone who has it together and isn’t anxious constantly. I just wanna be someone that isn’t me right now.

~Kay

the thing with art is… 

You look online and you see all these people drawing amazingly, in different styles, with different materials and different techniques and they all make some absolutely amazing works! And then you look at your own stuff in just looks… pale in comparison. 

So you’re going to have this moment of “I can’t be here. I can’t put this shit up there with all these amazing people.” and in the worst case “I should stop now” 

And some people do. They stop. Completely.

But you shouldn’t.

You need to think about these things rationally, first of all. 

Look at that favorite artist of yours. His art is amazing isn’t it? Do you know how long it took them to get to that point though? Do you have any idea how may papers they ripped out of frustration because nothing came out right, how many pencils they used up, how may hours they spent at their desk working and working and trying to improve? 

Art isn’t something you can just master in a week. It takes years. 

And do you want to know a secret? That artist you love is probably still not 100% satisfied. Artists never are. 

What artists are, however, are content. 

They’re happy with the pace they’re improving at, with the way their drawings have been looking recently. They love this style they finally managed to work out for themselves after trying for so many years. they’re content with not rushing and they’re content with showing the world their work and their progress.

So don’t be discouraged because it’s taking too long.

Talent isn’t what makes a good artists.

Practice and perseverance is.

Beware of Pride

Pride goes before destruction.” - Pr 16:18 NKJV

Think about the things we become proud over: the home we live in, the car we drive, the diploma hanging on our wall, the people we mingle with, and the position we hold. When you’ve worked hard to get to where you are, look out for pride! Paul asks, “Who makes you differ from another? And what do you have that you did not receive? Now if you did indeed receive it, why do you boast as if you had not received it?” (1Co 4:7 NKJV). So what should you do?

(1) Examine your belief system about who you are, what you have, and what you can do. Jesus said, “Without Me you can do nothing” (Jn 15:5 NKJV). Remind yourself: “I’m just the glove; God’s the hand that fills it.” That’ll help you to keep your perspective right!

(2) Focus more on others than on yourself. The saying—“When a person is all wrapped up in themselves, they make a pretty small package”—is true. “Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others” (Php 2:4 NKJV).

(3) Respect and value everyone you meet regardless of their social status, race, gender, or other distinguishing factors. When you walk in humility, people respect you and receive your input, and they don’t suspect you of having selfish motives.

The Bible says: “These things the Lord hates…a proud look, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that are swift in running to evil, a false witness who speaks lies, and one who sows discord among brethren” (Pr 6:16-19 NKJV). Today, beware of pride.

anonymous asked:

I'm writing this to you because i know that you would listen. None of my friends or family ever listen to what i have to say or when they do they just tell me that some people have it wrose and I should just suck it up but everything is a mess right now and I'm failing more than half of my classes because of my mental illness, i have shit ton of exams coming up and i know nothing about the topics. I'm afraid i'll drop out and I'm terrified, I honestly just don't know what to do.

HELLOOOOO ANON!!!

Okay. I’ve been in your shoes before, and we’ll work through this together.

First of all, breathe. Breathe. We’re gonna tackle this, one by one.

Make a timetable. It doesn’t have to be neat or colourful. Just something simple. Something simple that has all the dates from now till your last exam on it.

Next, if you know when your exams are, highlight them into your timetable. Star them in. Write EXAM in captials on that date. Whatever you fancy. But highlight them in.

Now, we look at the days we have left. What’s the one subject you struggle with or have a hard time grasping? Start with that one. Go over your notes, little by little, by splitting them into the days you have, and highlight the areas you feel that you need to focus on the most. Do that for all your subjects.

Now, you can either speak to your teacher in private about those topics, and ask them to go over it with you. Or, find YouTube videos explaining those concepts. I find that, when you use visuals, things become a lot more easier to take in, especially if they are abstract concepts. Keep watching those videos, and in time, that topic will start to visualise itself into your mind.

If you can, try out some past exam papers. Get a gist of what the exam format is like and what the style of questions could be. How many marks are these questions? How much detail do I need to go into in my answers? Do I know that much amount of detail? Try simplifying your notes to the absolute essentials you NEED to know.

Sleep. I cannot stress this one enough. Sleep. If you don’t get enough sleep, it’ll have a knock on effect in you studying. And when you study, always keep a water bottle with you, along with some form of healthy snack. Fruits, nuts, hummus and some veg, granola bars etc, something with fibre and complex carbs in it that’ll keep you alert, instead of crisps or sweets. And never skip your meals when you’re revising. No. Eat. Eat on time and eat regularly.

If its all getting too much, take a breather. Go outside for 5 minutes and get some fresh air. Clear your mind from the cluster. And just breathe. You can do this.

Never ever ever, before the night of the exam, try cramming in something new. It’s not gonna work. Know the stuff you know, and know it well by preparing from advance. You’ll see how sometimes, certain topics and concepts automatically link in with one another and everything in the broader sense, will start to make sense, when you step back and look at the bigger picture.

Know how long exam is gonna be. An hour? 2? 3? Pace yourself so that you more or less know how long you’ll spend on each section of the exam.

Read the question, highlight the main bits, cross out the other words. See how in depth you actually have to go and the marks of the question. If it’s a 2 mark question, it’s only asking for the basics. 8 or 10 or 15 or 20 marks? Yeah, plan out your answer before you write it. Think about what you’ve studied, and what concepts and topics link back to that question, and how you can write about them and use them to increase your marks. Examiners love it when students find connections between topics, they dig that kinda shit. It shows to them that you’ve thought about the question outside of the parameters they’ve set in the question.

And you know what? Your mental health comes first. If you have to drop out, there is no shame in that. I thought when I did, that there would be. Turns out, it was for the best. Because now, I’m doing a course I thoroughly love and enjoy after taking a whole 18 months out, and taking time out for myself, and putting my health first.

Anon, my love. You’ve got this. One step at a time. But prepare from now.

New Young Writers + Self-Publishing

I want to start this by saying I have NOTHING against self-publishing. Some authors SHOULD self-publish and they do it well because they’ve done the research, they’ve gotten their work copy-edited, they know how to market the book, they brand themselves. But, I’ve been seeing a lot of young writers (teens and twenty-somethings) who came from fanfiction writing and want to try their hand at writing original work. They write their first original novel… and then they put it up on amazon for the hell of it. They think it doesn’t matter if they sell a few copies, that’s a few dollars, right? DON’T DO THIS.

The problem with this is that later down the road, if those same authors want to explore traditional publishing… it will be harder because they now have sales baggage. Agents will ask about what work they’ve previously published and that self-pubbed book they posted up late one night on a whim and got maybe a handful of sales? That counts. And that means they’ve debuted as a self-pubbed author, which makes launching them through a traditional publisher will be much more different than if they had a completely clean slate. It makes agents and publishers more wary about picking them up.

A while ago there had been a self-publishing bubble where traditional publishes snapped up a lot of original self-pubbed books, but that has since more or less burst. Why? Well because in most cases the publisher discovered that quite a few of those self-pubbed books already maxed out their audience or reached their peak. Making it not so lucrative for them to relaunch the books. Not everyone is going to buy the new version if they already bought an older version unless the story has drastically changed.

Another thing to consider is that most often, self-pubbed pricing is considerably less than the list pricing of traditionally published books. Selling a thousand copies at $0.99 is very different from selling a thousand copies at $9.99 or higher. Less people are going to buy that same book if the pricing is higher. And very few traditional publishers are going to sell books consistently at $0.99. Maybe the occasional promo to mark the e-book down, but they won’t sell a paperback or hardcover at that price point. They need to cover their expenses to create those. Most successful self-pubbed authors sell a LOT of copies, thousands, hundreds of thousands, more even. They’ve reached non-Amazon bestseller lists (i.e. USA Today). They have legions of loyal fans who will buy anything they write because they know how to brand themselves and market their books. If your self-pubbed book isn’t hitting those numbers and that kind of audience, then it’s going to be very hard to convince a publisher to invest money in you.

So, as an agent, if someone approaches me with a book they already self-published, the first thing I ask is what were the sales and at what price point. And those numbers… that weighs in on my decision to take them on or not, because I know those same numbers are going to be something a publisher will have to overcome. It also makes me assume certain things about the author, like are they going to be impatient with me because they’re used to doing everything themselves? Traditional publishing works slowly and if they are used to just clicking a few buttons and having their work up, then they might get frustrated with the entire process. Or I might be wondering why they would want to move their book from self-pubbed to traditional publishing, could it be because the self-pubbing didn’t work out for them? That may mean they don’t know how to market themselves or there is no audience there. A million different questions arises and I start thinking they might simply be not worth the trouble. Especially if my inbox is already filled with fresh writers whose first book has NOT been previously published and the writing is just as strong.

So my advice to young writers: DO YOUR RESEARCH. Learn about what it takes to publish a book. If you decide that self-publishing is the way to go for you then do it, but do it right. Invest in copy-editing, cover design, marketing. A traditional book usually goes through at least 10 different people before it releases. If you are self-pubbing, YOU are doing all those 10 different jobs. So think critically before you just post it up. I know a lot of young writers don’t even know what the publishing process looks like, so consider this a PSA. Don’t jeopardize your chances just because you didn’t know better or because you are impatient. If being an author is really the career path you want for yourself then do your homework. People will expect you to be mature and professional.

anonymous asked:

Hey mells do you have any good recs for foot creams? My feet are super dried out and gross right now and I'm going on vacation in a few weeks in the Caribbean and I wanna be able to run about without thinking too much about my feet. Nothing seems to work 🙃😫

hiiii! 

The Emjoi Micro Pedi thingy is pretty great to help exfoliate your feet (a foot file works too, but the Emjoi will get you there a lot faster). Once you’ve got your foot situation exfoliated, I would say either use some coconut oil or a thick moisturizer ( I love Josie Maran’s Argan Body Butter), and then wear socks to bed to lock that moisture in. Try and do it 3 times a week until your feetsies are sorted, and you should be good as new!

I think one thing that we often forget as Studyblrs is that studying isn’t everything. Of course studying is important. Of course results are important. Of course doing the best you can is important but none of this is worth sacrificing your health over. Nothing is worth making yourself ill over. Nothing.

Having reached a crisis point with my mental health last week this seems more relevant to me than ever. Because of what happened last week I took two days off school and am spending this week only going to some of my lessons and not doing much of my homework. I do feel guilty about it; I feel like I should be doing all my work as usual and managing to carry on as if nothing happened but I’m coming to understand that this isn’t possible right now. I’m accepting that I need to take some time away from studying in order to look after myself and so I’m doing just that.

I know it’s easy to say ‘oh I’ll just finish this and then have a break’ or ‘oh I’ll have a break this weekend’ because I’ve been saying that for the past few months. Self care has been definitely lacking for the past few months and it was only when things reached a crisis point that I realised just how much I’d been neglecting myself for my studies.

Part of the Studyblr image on Tumblr seems to be that you have to study all the time when realistically that just isn’t possible. I love this community, I really do, but we need to start promoting that health comes before grades and that this is non-negotiable. We need to start admitting that we don’t work all the time and that we do have off days because we’re only human too and humans need time away from studying. We need to act as role models and show how to study in a healthy and balanced way. 

So work hard, study hard and strive to be the best that you can be but not at the expense of your health and happiness. Yes giving yourself an evening off to spend time with friends or catch up on sleep may mean that you get a B on that test tomorrow but that’s not permanent. You can make up that grade later on but you can’t sideline your health and happiness for too long. Nothing is more important than your happiness. Absolutely nothing.

xxx

ginhiji intimacy headcanons

  • gintoki’s a lot kinkier and much more willing to try different things. if there’s a toy or a costume in the bedroom gintoki’s responsible for it
  • despite all the kinks and games he’s into there is nothing that turns him on more than hijikata moaning his name
  • gintoki can make hijikata come two or three times in a night, but if hijikata’s the one who asks to do it again he’ll get unreasonably nervous and there’s a 70% chance he won’t be able to get his dick up again lol
  • he’ll turn his back to hijikata and have some dramatic inner monologue with his penis about the importance of team work and how badly he needs it right now but gin junior just won’t wake up
  • hijikata keeps telling gintoki that if he’s gonna leave hickeys he should do it from the collarbone down, but gintoki’s favourite place to kiss is his neck
  • hijikata won’t ever hold gintoki’s hand in public unless it’s dark and crowded enough that no one will notice
  • hijikata was a virgin before gintoki. he won’t admit it but gintoki knows and hijikata knows that he knows
  • hijikata hardly ever got off by himself until his relationship with gintoki started, and he started feeling restless and unsatisfied when they hadn’t seen each other for longer than two weeks. he felt ashamed of it at first, but when he thinks about gintoki it takes his mind off his guilt
  • gintoki gets restless after only a few days, and feels no shame touching himself and thinking about hijikata writhing on his futon and whimpering his name
  • on a few occasions gintoki was too greedy and hijikata was too loud, ever since then otose’s been onto them but she’s kept quiet about it in case she needs to blackmail gintoki into doing her a favour
  • from my other post: hijikata’s awful at blowjobs because he’s timid and embarrassed and unsure of himself but gintoki gets turned on regardless just because it’s him
  • gintoki has a habit of taking his teasing too far and making hijikata come once with just his fingers. no matter how many times hijikata snaps at him for it and gintoki promises not to do it again, he always gets carried away in the heat of the moment
  • hijikata’s most sensitive around his ears, and gintoki realised it first from his reactions
  • hijikata curls up under the covers and will not move for at least 20 minutes after they’re finished. usually gintoki will snuggle up beside him but even if he doesn’t hijikata will stay put
  • gintoki doesn’t like having sex with hijikata when he’s drunk, because even if he’s more adventurous and lenient when he’s drunk, gintoki feels like sex loses its meaning when hijikata’s only half aware of what’s happening
  • gintoki once convinced hijikata to try phone sex, and even though hijikata eventually agreed to it, he was so embarrassed he couldn’t reply, and the line was quiet for 4 minutes until hijikata couldn’t take it anymore and hung up
  • when they kiss, gintoki runs his hands through hijikata’s hair
  • gintoki has his sadistic side, but he’s usually gentle with him, and he’s never caused him any emotional or physical pain
  • gintoki’s fondest memory of him was when he talked hijikata into wearing kitty ears and a tail, and through amazing persistence, managed to make him add “nyan” to the end of his sentence, before he blushed so hard his eyes watered
The Story of Sid the Retail Worker

(Or: what I did at work today.)

North: The more I work here, the more I want to write a ‘Sid is miserable in retail and Geno keeps bothering him at work to flirt’ au

hazel-3017: DO IT

arcadeghostadventurer: Omg I’d love that :D Sid got into the body shop at desperate times and now he finds it easier than folding the same shirt rack a gazillion times a day so he stays but its retail nevertheless, let alone he knows nothing about the makeup section (he knows which body washes smell nice tho, that helps, kinda)

Hazel: i bet geno lewdly comments on how sid should apply the body butter on him, so he knows he’s doing it right 😛

Arcade: “like this?? or more smooth? I’m not know, maybe you do for me? show how??”

Hazel: is sid scandalised? or is he all coy and sure, maybe you i can show you after work?

North: Mostly he is annoyed. If Geno had approached him anywhere else, Sid would have said yes, immediately and proceeded to climb him like a fucking tree. But Sid is at WORK. His boss is looming over his shoulder at every turn making sure Sid gives his customers 'the full Body Shop experience.’ So yeah, Sid talks up the products. Sid cross sells. Sid massages the body butter, a different one every time into Geno’s hands. (Big, calloused, with long fingers.) and smiles politely

Arcade: I think the moment the manager disappears just slaps the body butter onto Geno’s forearm with the spatula and whispers “I want dinner first” while he rubs Geno’s arm not so nicely :D

Hazel: Geno is probably a dick about it
he’s a perceptive guy, he knows sid can’t really respond when his boss is breathing over his shoulder, so he makes all these lewd comments and innuendoes and delights in watching Sid scowl back at him. He’s essentially pulling at Sid’s pigtails

North: Geno leans close one day, too close, close enough his nose brushes along the side of Sid’s throat. “Smell so nice,” he sighs. “You sell here? Show?”
(Sid isn’t wearing cologne, but he grits his teeth and shows Geno to the men’s section anyway. “This one also comes in a body wash.” He says, just short of snapping. Lips and cheeks an angry red.)
(Sid’s manager is Right There, and it’s just totally uncool of Geno to make Sid want to drag him into the back room, pin him against the stock and blow him silly.)

Arcade: Imagine Sid wearing black on black, T-shirt tight over his shoulders and working those pants. I can’t blame Geno I’d go I body shop everyday too lol

Hazel: this is geno’s reasoning 100%

North: And the way Sid bends over to check if they have any more of that product they happened to be out of, no really, Geno is actually interested in buying this time, promise!

Hazel: who is geno in this though? does he too work at the mall/shopping strip or is he Evgeni Malkin, Pittsburgh Penguin, and ridiculously in love with the gorgeous body shop guy? The one his teammates have taken to calling Mr. Body for more reasons than one

Arcade: I want hockey!Geno! Geno wastes half of his income at body shop in a week. Why? Bc of a guy with a nice butt.

North: His gifts to everyone forever: body shop products. Half the team are unofficially repping thr Body shop

Hazel: DUDE. CAN YOU IMAGINE THE PRESS GOING, WHY DOES ALL THESE HOCKEY PLAYERS SUDDENLY HAVE SUCH FLAWLESS SKIN?!?!?! Story of the season.

Arcade: And the locker room smells like peaches?? Vanilla??? Jasmine???? ?? hOW??!???!??

North: (Is Sid a little bitter at first? He’s working minimum wage in retail and a fucking Pen is chatting him up.)

Hazel: mhm, maybe that accounts for like 60% of miscommunication. Sid thinks geno is just fooling around, and Geno just really, really is not

North: Sid’s store is the most profitable in North America, lol
(Bc Geno makes all the Russian clique buy from Sid’s store when in town.)

Hazel: maybe body shop in general sees such a rise in profit and can directly trace it back to hockey (specifically the Pens) and become official sponsers. As in they’ll have official events and shit where both Sid and Geno have to attend

North: Meet the Pens in store event, Sid is swamped for 8 full hours, no break.
They put up signs around the store detailing the various players fav. products

Arcade: Sid will throw whole bags of the stuff onto Geno’s face if he ever sees him again. He can’t feel his feet and his head is pounding

North: Sid is seriously reconsidering fantasizing about him in his bath tonight.
(He’s been dreaming of this bath since his first rush. Bought peppermint food cream, honey bath melt and is planning on breaking out his emergency box of wine for this.)

And on top of everything he has to close tonight bc the manager is 'too stressed out’ to stay.

Okay, so the guys are also super tired after the meet the players event, and they want to go out and get dinner so Geno musters up ALL his courage and approaches Sid while he’s stocking and getting ready to close. “We ll going for dinner, you want come with?”

Sid is all upset and bitter that the ONE TIME Geno approaches him AFTER WORK to ask him out, it’s with all his hockey buddies and DEFINITELY not a date. He is tired and sore and low key angry and he sighs unhappily. “I have to cash out. Have a good night, Mr. Malkin.”

“I’m wait for you.” Geno says, leaning against the till.

“You should catch up with the guys, this might take awhile.” Sid tries shifting from one tired, archy foot to the other.

“I’m want to wait for you.”

Sid sighs. “Can you just.” Geno flinches, stepping back out of Sid’s space and he regrets snapping. “Any other day, any other day you want to ask me out after work, I’ll say yes. But not tonight.”

Geno’s silent for long enough Sid starts to think he fucking did it. He finally stuck his foot in his mouth and ruined the one good chance he had with Evgeni fucking Malkin, because of course he did. Sid suppresses another sigh, bites his tongue and focuses on counting the tills. He still has a bath, a box of wine and his fantasies to look forward to, and that’s better than nothing.

But then Geno says, quiet, contemplative. “You work tomorrow?”

“Yes…?” Sid glances upwards, staring at Geno through his lashes, face still tilted toward his register.

“I’m take you out after?” Good god, Geno sounds small and hopeful.

Sid swallows tightly, and despite himself, smiles. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

AND NOW ALL THATS LEFT IS TO WRITE THE DAMN THING.

DAY 2545

Jalsa, Mumbai              Apr ¾,  2015             Fri/Sat  2:15 am








Indulgence !! 

Simple and lethargic indulgence for the past hours and days. It shall spell doom and trouble ever. Especially if one is aware of it and does nothing. I do nothing. I indulge. I am filled with hate for myself. I am not doing right, and that needs correction. 

That correction has begun .. not tomorrow not day after or the month and year after .. it has begun now !!

Work came up suddenly .. and the realisation that being away from it is devastating. I say this often and now it is getting indulgent. I mean how long can one carry on about their own known faults. So shut up Mr B !


Right then, shut I have … shut the forces that tear away at the airs about me. Shut the extravagance, or the perceived extravagance that was to have occurred this evening. Reduced the other indulgence that finds its way to places it should not be finding place to … and …. decided ! That is a major reform, to decide. Once done it has the strength of a mountain. Decision !

That I am uncommon is also factual. I am commonly uncommon. Which without discarding any aberrations of my content, reads in a way that there is a decided fault in my making ..

Birth cannot be rebooted to correct error. But errors can be booted to correction. That is what I need to do .. boot myself ! Right then .. that has begun. And begun well. How ? I shall tell you .. 

I corrected the FB numbering a short while ago by listening to Ef who made me aware. Hahahaha  … gotcha !!


No but seriously though, there is deep desire to move on another plane another thought another direction. What and where .. that shall be known … not perhaps in its announcement, but in its deed .. when it is done and when it is noticed ..


WHY ..

Why on earth am I continuing to be a ‘sophisticated rhetorician intoxicated by the exuberance of my own verbosity’ …. just cannot understand !

Change of topic ! They gave me an Award … another ! In my vanity van, at the shoot .. what for .. here :

The rod on the wood states 5 stars .. its form TimeCelebrex, or some such, from the TOI group, who conduct weekly assessment of the ratings of various artists, in different vocations and boundaries .. depending on your personal contributions for the media eye ..

And they decided .. hey , sorry .. Sorry to keep you twisting and turning your facility, to get me straight. No … no … its not alright, I shall need to settle this ..

That as you may now be able to decipher, is an Award .. wooden base, somewhat golden resembled element in shape, depicting the nature of the win, and there is name plate, for posterity - just in case … you know ??

It the winner male for the largest numbers on the social media … yeeehhhhhh !

Well done Ef’s and all that patronise this page, for the recognition. If you would not have appeared, neither would have this picture above, shopped fame ..

Watching ‘Fast & Furious 7′ is so inspiring … you can actually survive in its presentation and its moments of action. No one gets removed permanently, no one passes away … they all stick together, remain in one basin and operate ..

WE are the same in many ways … Extended Family, brothers sisters and dear friends, all rolled into one large destination. A destination that threatens to somewhere ask questions. Not from you to me or the reverse. Its the questions from what they see and read … the others I mean ! They are surprised by our size, our numbers and our stories of millions and millions … of followers , not the ‘green’ !! haha !!


The daughter is back with us .. as soon as we left each other after the wedding in Goa. She and me shall hold hands on the ramp for fashion walk, for charity, as shall Jaya and Abhishek, tomorrow .. we do this at times .. 

And then we shift to Delhi for the PadmaVibhushan recognition by the President of India and the investiture. Mathura, the birth place of Lord Krishna, beckons the next day for an event organised by the gracious Hema Malini, for her political constituency, and then its home again to the grind and the solace of solitude ..

This guy ‘solitude’ does spend a great deal of time with me these days. We meet often, talk discuss matters of mutual interest, laugh consider wonder and come to terms with each other … we contemplate too .. on what we are and what we need to do to consider our state .. and that is exciting, because we never ever really consider .. we speak to the waves .. the air waves .. which we hope as science develops, or has already developed, shall be able to retrieve for the next to next generations .. who we hope, if they consider to continue with this legacy, shall have access to what the two of us spoke about .. the two of us - ‘solitude’ and I …

I continue to however speak .. in all kinds of terms .. in different voices and conditions .. that is my ‘mantra’ … and yours shall be equally beneficial .. in case you do ever start ..

My ‘mantra’ for the moment is guiding me to my sleepathon … !!

Good night .. and rest well 

Amitabh Bachchan

anonymous asked:

What the heck is going on with Medical Attention? It started off 1-2 times a week being updated and this last time was over a week to the next chapter. If the writer wants us to read, she should be faster with the updates. She owes it to us readers. Love your blog by the way!

Ok anon take a step back right now. 

Jill doesn’t owe you anything. No fanfic writer owes you anything. 

Specifically at the moment, Jill is working over 70 hours a week, and has two kids. So she’s pretty busy. 

But that’s not even the point. She can be unemployed and have nothing else to do in her life and she doesn’t have to update often. 

You really need to understand that people usually can’t just sit down and whip out a chapter in an hour and have it ready to post then and there. Editing, rewriting, betaing, etc all need to happen.  

Writing inspiration comes and goes and many authors find it difficult to write for a while and then some can write a lot. It depends on the person. 

Bugging authors to update is not the way to get them to update more. Encouragement and positive words to show your appreciation can help, but even then no guarantees. Asking the author or me, saying things like this is just gonna make them upset and less likely to want to write a story that brings up negative feelings. 

Please do not think you are entitled to anything, they are writing these stories in their spare time, FOR FREE. For fun. For our enjoyment.

Clearly you are enjoying Medical Attention, so if you want more then leave your negative comments in your head and appreciate what you are given. 

And tbh a lot of stories I love would only get updates once a month, once every few months even. Update times will change for everyone. So Jill updating a little over a week is nothing. Also her chapters are long, which is so great. So yeah. Stop.   

Doing it Right #12

Peyton’s POV

Jack and I laid in the backseat of his car for what felt like hours. He held me against his chest and traced his fingers up and down my naked back. We talked and talked, about nothing and everything. It was like we were able to pick up right where we left off. I loved the feeling but it also made me nervous. I felt like we should talk about all the things that went wrong. We hadn’t been together for over a year, surely we couldn’t just go back to normal.

“Pey, stop it.”

Jack broke the silence. I lifted my head off his chest and looked up at him through my eyelashes.

“Stop what?”

“Stop overthinking this, it’s all going to be okay. We’re together now and we’re going to work everything out. I don’t care if it’s difficult, I don’t care how long it takes, we’ll figure it out. As long as we have each other, every little thing will be all right.”

I stared into Jack’s eyes while a smile spread across my face.

“How did you know what I was thinking?” I asked.

He chuckled, making his brown eyes sparkle. I had missed that so much.

“Because I know you better than I know myself, nothing will ever change that.”

I giggled and buried my head into his neck. His skin was warm and I loved being able to inhale his scent, he smelled like home. I sighed.

“I sure hope you’re right, Jay,” I whispered, doubt still lingering in my mind.

“I always am,” he joked. “Come on, let’s go, I’m sure everyone is well aware of our absence by this point.”

“Ughhhh, Jackers I don’t wanna go!” I whined.

“Let’s go for a few hours and then I promise, we’ll have plenty of make up time later,” Jack said to me with a wink.

“Fine. Let’s go.”

We crawled out of his car and pulled ourselves together. Jack helped me zip my dress back on. He kissed my exposed shoulder. I closed my eyes and reveled in his touch. He sighed and his breath tickled my skin.

“Ready?” he whispered.

“Ready.”

I climbed into the passenger seat of his car while he got in the driver’s side. Jack began driving to the reception venue while I fixed my hair. I was hoping it wouldn’t be too obvious what Jack and I had been doing. Yet a part of me didn’t care. I finally had him back and that was something I wanted everyone to know.

Jack’s POV

I pulled into the parking lot and tried to quickly find a spot. Once we were parked, I helped Peyton out of the passenger seat. I smiled at her and interlaced our hands.

“Fuck Jack, we’re so late!” Peyton giggled as she glanced at her phone.

“Well then hurry up, slow poke!” I jokingly called as I took off running.
Peyton started laughing while she ran with me.

“Jay, slow down, I can’t run in my heels!” she told me through laughter.

I stopped running and scooped her up bridal style.

“Jay!” she screeched.

I ran us through the parking lot, both of us laughing like idiots, when we finally reached the doors of the reception. I set Peyton back on her feet and smoothed out her dress. She fixed my bowtie and ran her fingers through my hair.

“How are you so sexy?” she whispered while staring at me.

I smirked and kissed her cheek. She took my hand and we walked inside.
Everyone was sitting at their tables while dinner was being served. We weaved through the tables until we found the one we were placed at. Sam and Grace sat there with Sam’s parents and siblings.

“Nice of you to join us,” Sam smirked while we sat down.

I pulled out Peyton’s chair and shot him a look. She sat down and I saw Grace wink at her. Even though I couldn’t see Peyton’s face, I knew she was blushing. I then pulled out my own chair and sat down next to Peyton. All the Wilkinson’s had smiles on their faces as everyone watched Peyton and me. I decided to break the silence.

“Alright, enough with the stares, how’s the reception been?”
Sam’s sister Emily laughed.

“It’s been great but we’re happy you two are here now!” she said sweetly. She then looked at Peyton. “It’s really good to see you again.”

“You, too, Em,” Peyton smiled at her.

With that, everyone began conversing and laughing. I glanced at Peyton to see how she was doing. Grace and her were already deep in conversation while they ate their dinner. I smiled. Everything felt like it was falling into place.

Peyton’s POV

After we finished dinner, Grace asked me to help her switch her shoes. We got up from the table and walked toward the bridal room they had the reception.

“Sooooo….give me the details!” She screeched the minute we were alone.

I giggled and closed the door behind us. I walked over to the little couch that sat by the mirror and sat down.

“Let me start off by saying, I know you planned all of what happened at the wedding and I hate you,” I smiled at Grace.

“Oh I’m sure you do, who would want hot makeup sex with Jack Gilinsky? You totally have every right to hate me,” Grace said sarcastically with a grin on her face.

I laughed.

“No but seriously, thank you Gracie. It feels amazing to be with him again,” I told her truthfully.

Grace had finished putting her flats on and she came over to sit down next to me.

“You don’t have to thank me, Pey. I know you’ve been hurting and I couldn’t watch it anymore. You and Jack need each other. You belong together and apparently everyone could see that but you guys.”

I wrapped my arm around her.

“What did I do to deserve a best friend like you?”

“You just got lucky,” Grace answered.

“Oh hush,” I laughed.

I laid my head against Grace’s shoulder.

“The wedding was beautiful, you and Sam look incredible.”

“And it feels incredible, I seriously didn’t know it was possible to be this happy,” Grace gushed to me.

“You deserve it more than anyone I know,” I told her honestly.

I had watched Grace live such a sad childhood. On the surface it looked like she had everything. Her family was wealthy, she had a beautiful home, and she was stunning. But behind all that was just a lonely girl who wanted a family more than anything else. She wanted parents who were present and she wanted to feel loved. My whole life, my family and I had done our best to be her family. I couldn’t help but want to cry with how happy I was for Grace. Finally, she had her own family, just her and Sammy.

“Well we should get back out there,”
Grace said standing up.

She extended her hands and I took them, pulling me up off the couch.

“Let’s go best friend,” I said while wrapping my arm around her waist.


Jack’s POV

When Peyton and Grace came back into the reception, the DJ started up the music. Everyone crowded onto the dance floor. Peyton walked around and socialized with the guests. I sat at our table and watched as everyone enjoyed themselves. After a few songs, the DJ slowed it down for the “Daddy/Daughter” dance. Mr. Wilkinson walked out to the dance floor and took Grace’s hand. It made me happy to see that. I knew how much it meant to Grace. As I watched them dance, someone came and sat down next to me. I glanced to my left to see that Peyton had sat down next to me.

“Hi,” she smiled.

“Hey,” I said while wrapping my arm around her.

She kissed my cheek and then redirected her attention the dance floor but I kept my eyes on her. Everything still felt surreal. After being apart for so long, it didn’t seem possible that we were actually together. As I watched her watch Grace, I knew what I wanted to do.

“Jack Gilinsky, can I have this dance?”

Peyton said while looking up at me.
I hadn’t even noticed that the Daddy/ Daughter Dance had ended and that people had gone back out to the dance floor.

“Absolutely, Peyton Logan.”

We walked out to the floor and Peyton wrapped her arms around my neck. I pulled her in close against me. She laid her head against my chest as we swayed to the peaceful music.

“I love you,” she told me while we danced.

“I love you too,” I said while I kissed the top of her head.

We swayed to the music and I spun her around, making her giggle. The song ended and everyone cleared the dance floor so Sam and his mom could share a dance. I watched as Mrs. Wilkinson cried as Sam and her danced. It was crazy to see. It felt like just yesterday we were in seventh grade playing basketball at the Wilkinson’s house. Mama Wilk would always bring us snacks while we played. I couldn’t believe I was watching Sam dance with her at his wedding. After some time of the two of them dancing, Johnson and his mom went on to the floor along with Mike and his mom. I walked over to my mom.

“Do you mind if I share a dance with Mandy?” I asked her.

“Not at all, go ahead,” she smiled.

I nodded and walked over to Peyton’s mom.

“Can I have this dance?” I asked her.

“Of course, Jack.”
We walked out to the dance floor and began dancing.

“I know it’s been a long time since you’ve seen me.”

“It has been, I’ve missed you, Jack.”

“I’ve missed you too, Mandy. And I just want to say that I’m sorry for all the pain I caused your daughter, I never meant to do that.”

Mandy nodded.

“You don’t need to apologize to me, it’s okay, Jack,” she told me with a smile.
She was always so genuine and loving. I hadn’t realized how much I had missed having her in my life.

“Mandy, can I ask you something?” I finally asked.

Peyton’s POV

I watched as Jack danced with my mom. It made my heart melt seeing the two of them together. As I watched, Ryan came and sat down next to me.

“Hi, Pey,” he said.

“Hey Ry.”

“So Jack’s back, huh?” he asked.

“Yeah, I guess he is,” I smiled as I answered, my eyes never leaving Jack.

“Good,” Ryan said.

His answer drew my eyes away from the dance floor.

“Good?” I confirmed.

“Yeah, good.”

My jaw dropped.

“Does this mean Ryan Logan, my brother Ryan Logan, actually approves of a boy in my life? So much so that he is happy he came back after a year of being apart?” I joked with Ryan.

“Oh shut up, P, you know I’ve always liked him! And I’ve seen how happy he makes you so yes, I am happy he’s back. Don’t let him leave again, okay?”

“Okay, Ry. Thank you, for always being here,” I told Ryan, the joking tone now gone.
“Always, P.”

We both turned our attention back to Jack and my mom. I saw Jack talking to her quietly and her face light up. I couldn’t help but wonder what he was saying to her as I watched from a distance.

Bob Dylan | 30x40cm | Graphite on Paper

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Some of my favourite Bob Dylan quotes:

“Everything passes, everything changes. Just do what you think you should do.”

“You´re going to die. You´re going to be dead. It could be 20 years, it could be tomorrow, anytime. So am I. I mean, we´re just going to be gone. The world´s going to go on without us. All right now. You do your job in the face of that, and how seriously you take yourself you decide for yourself.”

“All I can do is be me. Whoever that is.”

“I define nothing… I take each thing as it is, without prior rules about what it should be.”

“Don´t criticize what you don´t understand.”

“When I first heard Elvis´ voice I knew that I wasn´t going to work for anybody, and nobody was going to be my boss. Hearing him was like busting out of jail.”

“What´s money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.”

“Basically you have to suppress your own ambitions in order to be who you need to be.”

“He not busy being born is busy dying.”

“Don´t matter how much money you got, there´s only two kinds of people: there´s saved people and there´s lost people.”