nothing inbetween

Nothing Inbetween (Lucifer Morningstar)

Originally posted by m0rningstarthings

Pairing: Lucifer/FallenAngel!Wife!Reader
Words: 1000+
Warning(s): Luci’s mom, rude things said, i dont know how to make tags
A/N: dont worry, i do not like his mom either,, so have some fluff
Request:  I have a request for Lucifer. Idk if you caught up but I really don’t like his mom. So how about fallen angel! Wife! Reader being really annoyed about his mother appearance and she’s trying to keep as much distance from his mother as well as keeping Lucifer away from her? hope you understand


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My stepmother told me that heartbreak feels like quitting cigarettes. They become a habit then an addiction, and when someone walks away it’s like you’re left with the smell of nicotine all over you and the lighter in your pocket but nothing to put inbetween your lips. I’ve felt like that ever since you walked away, like I have this happiness and potential to be fine without you because I know you weren’t good for me anymore, but sometimes I crave you so fucking badly I reach for my phone to call you, almost like relapsing and nearly buying a pack. But I don’t. Instead, ironically I replace the want for you with anything that kills me from the inside. Like taking too many shots because I know it’ll burn and make me forget an entire night, or habitually chain smoking not because I crave the nicotine, but because it makes me lightheaded and focus on something other than the feeling of my insides being ripped out of me. Last weekend I smoked so much I felt the world spinning, and suddenly I imagined you in bed with her while I was knocking on your door and I couldn’t tell if I wanted to rip my face off or just smoke more until nothing felt real.
It’s all just so exhausting. I have to learn how to live without you. I have to do everything I once did all over again, torturously knowing you’re not a phone call away or by my side. Like my stepmother said, she had to re do everything without taking her smoke breaks. I can’t tell if coffee in the morning without a cigarette for her felt worse than I do when I wake up alone or check my phone to see no trace of you. She sat in her room in early mornings itching to light up, but chewed gum instead, much like how I stay up until 3 am, scared to sleep because of the nightmares, while twirling a razor blade between my finger tips contemplating whether to just make myself fucking bleed.
You always hated when I smoked. It reminded you of an old me, the sad girl with the tired eyes who sat at the bottom of her shower with the water burning her skin with blood flowing down the drain. You never knew that girl too well, I never wanted you to. Yet here I am, putting the thing that kills me in between my lips that you said you wouldn’t mind kissing forever, and lighting up just to try and erase every look you ever gave me, every kiss that made me addicted to you, and all the happiness you gave me, only to rip it right out of my hands all over again.
—  I don’t know myself anymore
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good morning I woke up with this in my head so I’m sharing

Nothing Inbetween | Leon & Emily

From dead boredom to feeling spontaneous, Leon was starting to wonder if he was bipolar. Perhaps it was the way everything he said and did around the woman and how it all sounded cheesy or trying hard, too calculated and even bordering on lame, that the reporter decided to just wing it.

For one night at least.

And if things should ever go south, he could make another lame excuse and blame it on alcohol before returning to his proper self the very next day; maybe send some flowers, drop a visit, all the common courtesies to be expected of him.

With both hands on the steering wheel, the young man took a deep breath, smiled cheekily at the woman sitting beside him and started the engine.

If only Montford offered more excitement.

Inbet-nothing-ween

I’d rather be a straight asshole or a pure gentleman, nothing in-between. I’m tired of playing both sides and getting caught at the wrong times. Being the nice guy who always gets taken advantage of or the douche bag who’s responsible for ruining everyones day. This way I only have to account for half the shit that gets pressed onto me. Have you ever felt tedious because whichever way you went about something couldn’t please anyone? Well fuck it. If you can’t please all of them, might as well entertain one half, and throw the middle finger to the other. Maybe gets you nowhere. Only yes and no will make you final decisions.