notebook lyrics

• i just want to feel attractive today • motion city soundtrack

anonymous asked:

I just wanted to say your writing is absolutely amazing and I just djdjdjsosnsijsjsjs CX I love. Also, if this hasn't been done already, may I request a friends to lovers au for vernon? Please and thank you (∩_∩)

seungkwan (here) |  dino (here) |  jeonghan (here) | hoshi (here) |  jun (here) |
seokmin (here) |  wonwoo (here) |  joshua (here) |  woozi (here) |  s.coups (here)
minghao (here) | mingyu (here)

  • you and vernon have always had,,,,a simple friendship
  • people were kind of rude to the two of you as kids because you were both the quiet type,,,,,which is why it was comfortable for you two to hang out
  • sitting in your living room watching movies with popcorn and not saying a word,,,,,sometimes your parents thought that was weird but you and vernon didn’t need,,,,,to say much to know that you were friends
  • and good friends at that because even when you guys got older,,,nothing changed 
  • you didn’t feel weird sitting at the top of vernon’s roof, laptop propped up on your textbooks playing some classic film while you tried to catch up on homework and vernon aimlessly wrote away in his book
  • the only thing that was new was your new found sarcasm ,,, the way you and vernon could shoot sly comebacks at one other was something you didn’t have before
  • “get your legs off my side of the blanket dumbass”
  • “why’d you spread out your blanket if you didn’t want me to put my legs on it mcgenius”
  • really it could seem harsh to anyone else,,,but you and vernon knew how to take silly nicknames and obvious statements of mockery with a grain of salt
  • which is why when vernon first told you about becoming an musician you’d brushed it off with a “go ahead hansol beethoven” but,,,,,,you quickly came to realize he was serious
  • with notebooks full of lyrics threatening to pile and fall off his desk,,,,his new friends in the music scene from a producer named jihoon to a boy who dreamed of being a vocalist, seungkwan
  • and sure you were happy for him,,,,,that he was finally finding himself in the world,,,,but you couldn’t help but be worried
  • music,,,,didn’t always guarantee a stable future
  • which isn’t exactly what vernon wanted to hear when he came to you with an idea for is first mixtape
  • and it wasn’t supposed to be a  fight,,,,,,but it was,,,,,,,,and you’d left telling vernon that if he failed you wouldn’t be there to tell him you told him so
  • and vernon had said something like you didn’t have to be there at all
  • and it felt,,,,when you got home,,,,,that those years of being the only two people in the world who understood each other
  • had vanished
  • and you and vernon were speaking completely different languages
  • looking at your phone everyday,,,the texts from other friends and family but vernon’s left on seen
  • passing by your favorite pizza place with him
  • having people ask how he was,,,,,,,it all felt so weird
  • until half a year had passed and you hadn’t talked 
  • not until a friend sent you a link to a soundcloud,,,,the familiar name ‘vernon’ popping up and the cover of his mixtape playing on your phone
  • and the songs were,,,,,amazing,,,,,no doubt vernon was talented but one song,,,,,,,,stood out
  • titled ‘i didn’t want to let go’ you listened to the lyrics,,,,the description of the two kids meeting in school - them against the world - quietly holding hands and watching the movie on the screen in comfortable, perfect silence
  • and then the fight,,,,,the mean words,,,,,the feeling of being abandoned by the one person in the world that you,,,,,,,,,love
  • and then you hear it,,,,, ‘i don’t want to let go, come back’ and you jerk in shock when you feel the tears run down your cheeks
  • because this is what you felt,,,,,,that fight,,,,,,,,,,it wasnt just friends fighting it was more,,,,,
  • you’d loved vernon for a long time,,,in a way deeper than friendship and now you were listening to his voice telling you the same thing
  • and it was already well past midnight outside,,,,but the warm summer weather made it possible for you to run,,,,,run with your phone pressed to your ear
  • vernon’s sleepy voice on the other end asking who it was
  • but when he heard you,,,,,,you could literally see him bolting upright in bed
  • telling you he’ll be there in five minutes
  • and then the two of you,,,,standing on the bridge between your neighborhoods under the street lights with cars passing by 
  • but only you,,,,with messy hair and home clothes on,,,,vernon there too,,,,,,sweatpants and a loose tank top
  • and looking at each other,,,,after half a year had passed,,,,and finally saying “im sorry” for that stupid fight
  • but that wasnt enough and before you could even tell vernon you’d heard his songs you pulled him in 
  • arms around his neck and pressing your lips to his in a kiss that sends electricity down both your spines
  • but vernon’s shaky hands closing in around your waist,,,,,,,perfectly,,,,,,,because it’d been a long time coming
  • till the perfect best friends became something much more
  • and whispering into vernon’s neck you ask him if that song is really about you
  • and vernon confesses, shyly with his face in your hair that every song he’s written,,,,,,,every song about love and pain and wanting something has been about you
  • the person who inspires him,,,,his muse,,,,,,,,and you cling to him a little tighter and promise that you’ll support him no matter what
  • and you guys both hesitate to say it,,,but there in the night you say your first “i love you”’s 
Cracks || BTS Suga

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 1340

Part 2 

You tried to understand that your boyfriend was busy being in an idol group and all. Tours, recordings, music broadcasts, and promotions were tiring. Therefore, you always tried to stay out of his way and cope with the loneliness. It was hard, but you didn’t want to be in his way. You saw your friends more than your own boyfriend. You envied them. Their boyfriends were always texting them or there for them. Yoongi, on the other hand, was always busy. Even when your grandmother passed away, he wasn’t there to comfort you. You never told him. It was hard for you, but you tried to always put on a strong front and smile in front of Yoongi. You didn’t want to be a burden to him.

You don’t know where it went wrong. He was so caring and affectionate toward you in the beginning. After 3 years of dating, however, he stopped texting you every morning, afternoon, and night. Soon, the texts disappeared and so did Yoongi. He stayed at the dorm all the time now. You haven’t seen him for months and he didn’t bother to text or call you.

“You need to be selfish for once noona.”

You were hanging out with Bangtan’s maknae line and Jimin was starting to worry about your relationship with his hyung. You brought lunch over for them knowing they would probably skip it, like always. They were too engrossed in practice to know that their bodies were starving.

“Yeah, Jimin is right. We’ve never seen Yoongi hyung act affectionate with you. You’re always texting us to check up on hyung. That’s not right.”

You thought Jimin and Taehyung were right, but you just couldn’t. You knew if this kept going, one of you will start to fall out of love. This relationship would become toxic.

“Why don’t you go and take the lunches to the hyungs. We’ll continue to practice after eating.”

“Okay Kookie. Remember to rest before going back to practice. You’ll get stomach cramps.”

They nodded and you left to find the other 4. You found them all in the recording studio talking and laughing. Hoseok was the first to jump up and hug you.

“(Y/N) noona!”

He hugged you and you laughed. You were always close to Hobi cause you and him were closest in age.

“Hey Hobi! Hey Namjoon, Seokjin oppa.”

They all hugged you, except for your own boyfriend. You were kind of disappointed, but you quickly got rid of the disappointment in your eyes and held out the lunches you had made for the boys.

“I know you guys would probably skip lunch like always, so I bought you guys something to eat. It may not be as good as Seokjin oppa’s, but it’s edible. The other 3 already tried it.”

“Ey, your food is delicious. But you know, if you need any help with anything, I’m here to help!”

“Thank you oppa.”

Everyone except Yoongi grabbed a lunch box from the bag. The other 3 quickly sensed the tension between the 2 of you and left the 2 of you to talk. You stood there awkwardly as Yoongi went back to work. After a few minutes of just standing, you grabbed a lunchbox and opened it. You set it down in front of Yoongi and turned his chair around.

“Please, take a break and eat.”

“I’m busy if you can’t sense that already.”

Your heart cracked. His harsh tone was enough to cause tears to form.

“I know, but you should at least eat a little. Just a bite?”

You were practically pleading at this point. He could be as cold as he wanted to you, but you wanted him to at least take care of himself. You pushed the lunchbox closer to him only to have it knocked out of your hands and onto his lyric notebook. Your eyes widened and you quickly grabbed his notebook from under the food. You knew how important it was to him. It was his life.

“(Y/N)! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!”

“I’m sor-”

“DO YOU THINK A SORRY IS ENOUGH? YOU COULD’VE RUINED EVERYTHING. You are so lucky it was closed.”

“I said I was sorry. If you just complied.”

“Are you blaming me now? Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

Another crack in your heart.

That was your last straw. It hit some nerve that you never knew even existed. And neither did he.

“LEAVE YOU ALONE? I’VE LEFT YOU ALONE FOR MONTHS NOW! NOT A SINGLE TEXT OR CALL FOR 4 MONTHS AND YOU STILL WANT ME TO LEAVE YOU ALONE? Sometimes I wonder if we’re even in a relationship. You could at least send a text. I’m just asking for one simple, ‘hey’. Is that too much to ask for?”

He was taken aback from your sudden outburst. You were always a quiet person and you always kept calm even in the most frustrating situations.

“I was busy. What’s up with you? You never shout.”

Another crack.

“Maybe if you bothered to care, you would understand why all this is happening.”

“I don’t have time. I wish you would just understand me sometimes. I’m an idol. I can’t be there to comfort you through everything. If you waited a little more, I would’ve been home. Stop being so selfish.”

You were speechless. Everyone around you were right. You have been too nice to Yoongi. He has taken your love for him for granted. The tears you have been holding fell and now all your anger has become sadness.

“Maybe I don’t want to wait anymore. Maybe…maybe, I can’t wait anymore.”

With that, you left. You left him standing there still taken aback from not only your words, but also your tears. You left him to think about where this relationship went wrong. It took him a while to finally figure out that you didn’t just throw a tantrum and leave to cool off. You left him and your relationship with him.

“Hyung, how could you say that to noona?”

“Guys, I’m not in the mood.”

“How could you still say that?! You haven’t talken to her in 4 months. She has to check on her stupid boyfriend through us. She texted us to make sure you were eating, sleeping, and taking care of yourself. She’s texted all of us because she didn’t want to bother you. She’s been understanding. She has been waiting for you and here you are. Working.”

Namjoon scoffed. Jimin shoved 6 phones onto the desk Yoongi was working at. There were endless conversations with you. You telling them to make sure he was alright and healthy. There was even a group chat he wasn’t a part of. And then there was his phone. Empty. Not a single text since 4 months ago. As he finished reading, a sound from everyone’s phone.

(Y/N) : You won’t be hearing from me for a while. Good luck on your comeback. Please don’t tell Yoongi. I’m just a burden.

Hoseok quickly snatched his phone and texted back. After getting another text, he turned to Yoongi and held his phone out for him to see the conversation he just had with you.

Hobi: Where are you going? Please tell me you aren’t leaving.

(Y/N): Remember that offer I got at work to work on a fashion show in Paris. I decided to accept. I’m going to be gone for at least a year or maybe I’ll just stay there.

Yoongi froze. You were leaving. You were leaving him and never coming back. He looked up quickly when he heard another text come in.

(Y/N): Guys, I’m leaving in 2 weeks to Paris. Please don’t tell Yoongi. Tell him I met some other guy or you guys make up some excuse.

You still thought of him even though he didn’t even glance at you for 4 months. Yoongi started to cry. He just ruined a great relationship. He just ruined what could’ve been his wife and the mother to his children. He made the woman he loved the most leave.

But the lows are so extreme
That the good seems fucking cheap
And it teases you for weeks in its absence
But you’ll fight and you’ll make it through
You’ll fake it if you have to
And you’ll show up for work with a smile
And you’ll be better
And you’ll be smarter
And more grown up
And a better daughter or son
And a real good friend
And you’ll be awake
You’ll be alert
You’ll be positive though it hurts
And you’ll laugh and embrace all your friends
And you’ll be a real good listener
You’ll be honest
You’ll be brave
You’ll be handsome and you’ll be beautiful
You’ll be happy

Your ship may be coming in
You’re weak but not giving in
To the cries and the wails of the valley below
And your ship may be coming in
You’re weak but not giving in
And you’ll fight it
You’ll go out fighting all of them

-Rilo Kiley, “A Better Son/Daughter”

Acrylic/alcohol spray ink, stencils, and black Pilot MultiBall pen.

got7 as fratboys: jaebum

a/n: ok so here’s the first one!!!!! it turned out waaaaay bigger than I expected but I hope y'all cope with me and read it all bc I think it’s worth it. as I said it, there’s a nsfw part at the end so skip it if you’re not comfortable with that. and please, hit me up with feedback!!!!!!!! those are very important so yeah


playlist

⇒ im jaebum: president

  • major: linguistics 
  • minor: philosophy 
  • ok so starting off with mr president himself: im jaebum!!!
  • ofc he was gonna be the president pls
  • so he majors in linguistics bc he wanted to do something different??? and like wanted to know the origins of words and its impacts etc etc LIKE DEEP STUFF
  • and he minors in philosophy bc well DEEP and he actually likes it a lot and he’s really good at it
  • you might think the guys don’t really respect him as a president but BITCH when jaebum is being serious they respect the hell out of him
  • he is the only one besides jinyoung that can actually put the place in order
  • a really good president???? like the university claims he’s an example even tho GOT had some complains in the past bc of it’s wild parties
  • he has this mysterious bad boy vibe all around him
  • but deep down he’s actually a softie
  • loves LOVES lOvEs his cat - her name is nora and she is the most precious thing to him
  • he wants to get more cats but he’s scared the guys will accidentally hurt them???? but getting more cats is totally on his plans
  • everyone on campus knows him - not just bc of GOT but well bc he’s that type of person that you just know who he is
  • he’s a MAJOR photography enthusiast
  • as you can see his instagram is totally aesthetic and with nice pictures
  • looks fucking good with a camera on his hands
  • actually looks fucking good doing anything
  • he’s also very passionate about music
  • like I told you he’s into deep stuff and he finds music quite deep
  • he’s actually a really good singer - youngjae said so himself
  • he also helps youngjae with his songs sometimes
  • they’re actually planning on recording jaebum a mixtape bc SURPRISE he’s really good at writing songs
  • has his earphones with him the whole time and don’t you dare touch them unless he offers to show you what he’s listening
  • yugyeom touched it without invitation once and well… it didn’t have a happy ending
  • his ipod is filled with pop punk songs and also rnb
  • reads a lot but not in public - no one actually knows why
  • maybe it has something to do with him wanting to keep this bad boy image around campus
  • has good grades bc he’s one of those people who are naturally smart and intelligent
  • he skips classes quite often
  • and when the guys wanna do it??? NO NO YOU BETTER GET YOUR ASS TO CLASS
  • bambam tried to argue once that “why can you skip classes and I can’t????”
  • jaebum dead ass played the president card and bambam just lowered his head and went to class
  • he usually skips it when he’s way too hangover or he didn’t get a good night of sleep
  • has some trouble sleeping at night sometimes so you’ll often find him taking short naps at his classes
  • when he’s at parties he’s very lowkey unless he’s REALLY drunk
  • then he turns into the most extra person on the planet?????
  • he once went down the stairs with nothing but wipped cream on his Parts™ bc he lost a bet he made when he was drunk
  • no need to say the girls went NUTS
  • talking about girls…. they all want him
  • they all wanna know what’s his deal like is he really intimidating is he a bad boy etc etc
  • he didn’t use to hook up a lot
  • actually he kinda fell in love with this one person but it didn’t end well
  • he got hurt and since then he only has sporadic one night stands and they are with girls from other universities so he won’t have to see them often
  • no one talks about this girl episode tho
  • actually he doesn’t actually talk about his problems openly at all
  • when he’s too bothered he goes to jinyoung bc they go way back and are truly best friends
  • jinyoung just gets him and isn’t scared to tell him when he’s wrong
  • BUT he has everything written down on his notebook: his lyrics, his feelings and everything that goes on his mind
  • it is black and it says “people I want to punch in the face” in the cover
  • he thought about putting a picture of nora but decided against it bc it was “too soft”
  • he carries this notebook with him at ALL TIMES like truly 24/07
  • and he doesn’t like anyone touching it in fact it is his most private thing and no one can read it
  • jinyoung almost read it once and jaebum caught him
  • jaebum didn’t speak to him for a few weeks and shit got serious but they got over it after jinyoung begged for his forgiveness for like 15 days straight
  • he goes to the same cafe every morning ever since his first year
  • everyone there knows him and his order
  • he usually stays there for quite a while just scribbling things on his notebook and drinking coffee
  • he likes his coffee dark and bitter and he says it’s just like his soul
  • no one buys this analogy tho
  • you must be wondering where do you fit in this
  • well you’re quite of a coffee enthusiast yourself and you love to go around on campus and discover new cafes etc
  • one day after your children’s psychology class you were wondering around campus near the philosophy building and there was this small cafe with a cat by the window and you thought oh cute
  • so you decided to come in and order your traditional caramel macchiato
  • from that day on you started going there almost every day
  • a few weeks later you noticed this handsome mysterious guy writing down on his notebook and you couldn’t stop looking???? and then you realized he was there everyday too
  • you sort of wanted to talk to him but he’s too intimidating
  • one day one of your friends went there with you and he told you about im jaebum and how everyone knows him and how intimidating he must be
  • so then you kinda dropped the idea of talking to him until
  • well one day he left the cafe in a huge rush babbling something about forgetting a test and he ended up leaving his notebook on his table
  • you decided to pick it up and save for him so you could give it back the next day
  • and so on the next day you’re drinking your coffee and he arrives and as soon as he sits you go there with the notebook in hands but things don’t go that well
  • “hm hey so you forgot this here yesterday and I-” “oh my god what are you doing with my notebook” “calm down greg I just picked it up for you bc you forgot it on the table” “DID YOU READ IT?” “no???” “tell me the truth did you read it” “I said I didn’t” “just give me my fucking notebook I’m leaving”
  • you stood there with this confused look but then you got mad???
  • “well here’s your fucking notebook. I didn’t read it. I wouldn’t invade your privacy like that. I just kept it bc I also come here everyday and I thought well I’ll be nice and save it so I can give him back tomorrow. I would’ve left it on the table if I knew you were gonna be this rude. here it is. have a nice day”
  • and you left bc you were angry????? who does he think he is????
  • so from that day on you kinda changed the time you used to go to the cafe bc you didn’t wanna see him
  • fast forward a few days and a friend from your children’s psychology class - choi youngjae himself - invites you to a party his frat is organizing and you decide to go like why not
  • then you remember im jaebum is the president of the frat
  • but then you think OH SCREW IT I’m going and I’m gonna have a good time
  • so you’re there and a few drinks have settled in already. you’re not drunk you’re just a bit tipsy and joyful
  • you finally see youngjae so you go there to say hi and you two start talking
  • then you notice that jaebum is coming your way and you can’t not roll your eyes
  • “you know her youngjae?” “yeah jae. she’s in one of my classes. wait you two know each other?” “unfortunately. jaebum was an asshole to me a few days ago so excuse me I have to go”
  • and youngjae is giving jaebum this look that says wtf did you do dude go apologize
  • jaebum rolls his eyes but he goes after you and he calls you “cafe girl”
  • you turn and you’re not in the mood so
  • “what do you want jaebum?” “I wanna know your name so I can apologize properly”
  • you debate on just leaving but you tell him your name and he just stares at you
  • “are you actually saying something or can I just leave?” “hm no! don’t leave.. I just.. I’m sorry. I was an asshole. I shouldn’t have acted like that, you know, like a stupid rude asshole.” “yup you shouldn’t” “so I’m really sorry. and grateful that you kept my notebook. it’s really important to me and very personal so that’s why I acted like that.” “ok noted” “can I get you a drink to earn your apology and then we can talk like two normal people?”
  • you thought about saying no. you did. but he had the prettiest and most genuine smile across his face and you couldn’t deny
  • and then you two talk all night long and you find out he’s actually a really nice and cool guy with a great talk
  • so it’s late and you have to go home and he offers to walk you to your dorm and you tell him there’s no need but he insists and you let him
  • you two keep on talking and walking and he grabs your hand and when you look at him he has the cutest smile and that makes you wanna kiss his face but you don’t
  • you get to your dorm and you two exchange numbers and as soon as your inside your room you get a text
  • [01:35] jaebum: I really wanted to kiss you tonight. but I’ll take you on a proper date before that. are you free tomorrow?
  • so from that day on you two start hanging out and getting to know each other and going on dates and cute cafes and holding hands across campus and kissing under trees like this huge walking cliche
  • at first girls kept staring at you like they were surprised that THE im jaebum has a girl
  • and it was funny bc he walked with his arm around you like you were the most precious thing on the campus and the girls also looked kinda jealous
  • he allowed you to read something on his notebook once: it was a bunch of scribbled notes about you and it was so sweet and loving and then he asked you to be his girlfriend so BOOM you two were official
  • the guys start teasing the hell out of him because WOW you’ve turned jaebum into this huge ball of fluff
  • he’s really this soft dork whenever your around and that’s really cute
  • you two have this ritual of going to That cafe every morning and when one of you can’t make it the other one picks up coffee for the go
  • you had to be approved by nora in order for this relationship to work and sometimes he regrets it bc he swears you and nora like each other more than you two like him
  • it took him a while to open up to you but he did eventually
  • he makes you cds in a very old fashion way every month with songs he wants to show you or that make him think of you
  • and you give him this list with book recommendations so you can discuss later
  • you spend a lot of time at the frat helping him out with his president duties
  • he walks you to his classes
  • loves LOVES seeing you in his jackets or with the frat’s shirt
  • takes a lot of pictures of you - really, a lot. you’re having dinner? his camera is up. you’re putting make up? his camera is up. you’re sitting on the couch? his camera is up. like literally he has a ton of pics of you in his camera roll
  • you can keep him in check when he’s too nervous or too stressed and that’s great
  • he’s a bit jealous sometimes but he’s getting better
  • sex is a very important thing for him bc he belives that sex is a way to express love
  • like honestly he is very very sexy and he basically exhales sex so
  • usually he’s a dom and into rough sex
  • but there are some days when he just wants to appreciate you so he goes in deep for passionate sex and those days are amazing
  • sex is always very intense and intimate
  • not much into trying new things but will do it for you
  • never steps over your boundaries when it comes to sex (actually over anything but especially in bed) and you trust him a lot so
  • has a huge oral kink and also likes hair pulling
  • doesn’t care about doing it when the guys are around the dorm
  • overall he’s not the typical frat boy and a very soft person and you two became the bossy royalty couple and everyone loves you two

anonymous asked:

I don't want to be that person, but the writing in that notebook (the two ghosts lyrics) looks quite similar to a certain bear's...

yeah i think someone already compared the handwriting and it was iterally harry lol but again not that we needed a confirmation considering his fiance’s reflection was on the sunglasses of the bear once and it was glorious