I worked in a small but expensive Chinese restaurant in rich & old town, Naples fl. Well the first story I have is about my boss who owns the business. I was a hostess and I would also bust tables and occasionally help with drinks and food as well as taking reservations and scheduling layout of tables. We only had so many booths and they were the most popular. If you wanted a booth, you would request on for reservations. One night it was extremely busy and I had a group of four people asking for the booth, but I had it reserved for a party who was supposed to be there in 5 minutes. My boss comes over as I’m trying to work out a table for these people and she sits them in the booth. Five minutes later, the customers who requested the booth show up and complain that there isn’t a booth and I tried to explain what happened and they were angry and asked to see my manager. So my boss comes over, checks out the problem and WHILE the man is speaking to her and complaining about their situation, she checks her phone and walks away. I apologized greatly and they left the restaurant.

There were so many pissy costumers there it was terrible but one night a table of 13 older women come in early, just after 5pm. They were incredibly sweet and just happy talkers. The bartender helped them at first since they were placed near the bar. The waiter was a 21 yr old who was just trying to get through college and near the end of their meal, I was helping him bust a table outside when he says to me that their bill came to $500. I was amazed and we joked about the tip and I was like “what if they gave you 100% tip?” And he was like I would kiss their feet. Not 15 minutes later in the back he gets face to face with me and goes “You’re not gonna believe it” and I was like “try me”
They gave him $200 on the card and $300 cash as well as a tip directly to the bartender. Those are the best people ever

  • Pathologist: *enters the morgue*
  • Sherlock: *examining a body*
  • Pathologist: *rolls his eyes* Excuse me, sir, this area is out of bounds to-
  • Sherlock: *still looking at the body* It's okay.
  • Pathologist: *sighs* If you don't leave, I'll have to call security.
  • Sherlock: *rolls his eyes* I said it's fine.
  • Pathologist: *frowns* Why is it fine?
  • Sherlock: *smirks* I'm sleeping with the boss.
  • Pathologist: ...
  • Pathologist: *confused* You're sleeping with Stamford?
  • Sherlock: *looks up; annoyed* The other boss.
  • Molly: *enters the morgue, carrying coffees; irritated* Here's your bloody coffee, you git. Have you finished now so I can do my job?
  • Sherlock: *steps aside; takes the coffee, grinning* Yes, boss.
  • Pathologist: ...

Today was a very very busy day at work and I was typing up an invoice for gasoline for the unit base generator and my boss and I were massively overworked and very stressed and as I was typing I put ‘gason’ instead of ‘gasoline’ and I started absolutely fucking dying of laughter, like there were tears rolling down my face, and my boss was like ‘what’s so funny?’ and I managed to speak through my sobs and said ‘I… I spelt ‘gasoline’ like ‘gason’,’ and then she started cracking up, and I said ‘it’s not even that funny,’ and she gasped through her tears ‘yes it is,’ and we both just sat there crying for like 20 minutes 

it was one of Those Days

bubble bath

a/n: hope it’s okay. love ya beauts


Another stressful day at the office. I’ve been spending a lot of time here, 40 hours a week doing paperwork. I went home every night exhausted and irritated. My boss was an absolute dick. 

He would call me to come into work at noon, and I wouldn’t get off until 10. Luckily for me though, tonight was Friday, and I had Saturdays and Sundays off and next week was my vacation, and then the following week I would be moving into my new position as I had just gotten a promotion, hence why I was so busy. My boss wanted me to finish all this paperwork before I moved up, since he didn’t have any other reliable or responsible assistant.

I had just got into my car, huffing and lighting a cigarette as I drove home. Nate hated that I smoked cigarettes since ‘they slowly kill ya’ and he might have been right, but I only did it on rare occasions when I was stressed.

I walked into the house at a quarter til 11, tossing my keys onto the little table we had by the front door where all our shit piled up. Removing my heels immediately afterwards, my feet killing me, and my legs burning from walking back and forth from my cubicle to my boss’s office to the copy machine, and basically all over the whole entire building.

I walked upstairs towards the bedroom, figuring since it was so quiet in the house Nate was out with the boys. That was our usual routine at this point. The boy and I have been together since we were 15, so 6 years now, we didn’t need to spend all our time together. We always managed to find some time to spend together though, like Saturday mornings, we usually laid around all morning, go a few rounds, by mid afternoon we would move from the bedroom downstairs, to the living room, watching tv, rolling a few blunts and just eating and watching tv and talking until the evening when we would go out with the guys and everyone.

So I was excited to just go up and go to bed, probably relax and watch tv with a bottle of wine, how I usually spent my Fridays.

Taking my hair out of the updo I had from work and shaking out the curls as I pushed the bedroom door open I jumped a bit when I heard a cough come from the center of the room. Bringing my attention to my surroundings, I realized that Nate was standing in the middle of the room in a pair of joggers hanging low on his waist, letting me know that he wasn’t wearing any boxers underneath, and shirtless, with a bottle of wine in hand.

“Nate. What are you doing?” I asked, walking up to him, or more so, wobbling cause my legs killed, and wrapping my arms around him and kissing him briefly.

“I know works been crazy, so I thought tonight I’d be a good boyfriend and stay in with you and take care of you.” he spoke, letting his one hand rest on my hip, looking at me in the eyes.

“Nate, don’t be ridiculous. You’re a great boyfriend. You shoulda went out with the boys tonight.”

“no I don’t mind staying in with you ma.” he spoke, squeezing my side a bit and lowering his lips down to mine. Breaking the brief, sweet kiss he rested his forehead on mine. “how bout a bubble bath for my girl?” he mumbled.

“Nate really it’s fine. I c-”

“don’t argue with me here babe. I already ran the water, now let’s go enjoy our bath and wine.”

I loved when Nate got like this, all lovey and cute and romantic. 6 years together was a long time, so Nate and I have definitely had our ups and downs, some worse than others. Like when he first started getting bigger with his career he started going out way more, and he acted all tough, like he didn’t wanna ‘cuff’ so him and I had a pretty rough time during that period. Eventually knocking some sense into him, we figured shit out and here we stand today.

While he would never admit to acting like this around the boys, I didn’t mind. I loved this side of Nate, along with all the other sides I’ve seen of that boy. 

We were currently in the tub, Nate getting in first and sitting down allowing me to sit in front of him where he wrapped his hands around my chest, particularly grabbing my chest and pulling my back into him so we were cuddling in the warm tub.

He asked me all about my day, listening to what seemed to be the same story I told him every night after work. About halfway through my story he started rubbing my shoulders, giving me a massage that I didn’t realize I needed.

After a lot of time in the tub together I could say I was finally relaxed. I wasn’t stressed over work and certainly not as exhausted as I had been, simply from being drained from any energy I had.

Taking one of Nate’s shirts and slipping that on after the bath I crawled into bed next to him and he immediately threw his arm around me, pulling me into him. Turning on the tv we started watching some movie neither of us had seen. I started tracing invisible designs on his chest, and traced his tattoos as we laid in bed.

“it’s not even midnight and we’re already in bed.” I yawned out. “we’re like an old married couple.” 

“babe, you’ve been busting your ass all week, you probably shoulda been in bed an hour ago.” Nate laughed, turning to face me.

“I’m in bed now, it’s practically the same thing.”

“nah, you need to get your rest.”

“I usually don’t get more than 5 hours of sleep anyway Nate. I’m fine.”

“just saying, I’d rest up for tomorrow babe. I’m planning on us staying in bed all damn day.” he playfully growled, nuzzling his face into my neck and playfully biting the skin, causing me to giggle and try to push him away.

“Nate.” I laughed as he finally looked at me smiling.

“How’d I get so damn lucky?” he asked, rhetorically.

“I ask myself the same question everyday.” I smiled, grabbing his cheeks as he started to lean in, our lips meeting for a sweet and passionate kiss that said i love you.

pulling back I rubbed my thumb along his cheek and smiled, looking at his lips and his eyes and just admiring all the little things about him.

“I love you Nathan” I smiled, my eyes drooping as I got hit with tiredness, ready to pass out at any minute.

“I love you too (y/n). so much” he replied, kissing my cheek and then spooning me. Not even 3 minutes later I was fast asleep.

“thank you for giving me her.” Nate muttered as his eyes closed in his silent prayer to the man who blessed him, and seconds later he fell asleep too.

Things That Each Function Says

Se: STOP BEING SO BORING! Let’s live life! #YOLO

Si: Wish we could turn back time, to good old days….

Fe: YOU ARE A SELFISH PIECE OF SHIT. But I feel an obligation to love you :)

Fi: My mood changes faster than the time it takes you to pronounce Felix Arvid Ulf Kjellberg


Ti: You did not just say that. What you just said was so stupid my brain can’t even comprehend the level of ignorance you have just acquired.

Ni: Mirror, mirror on the wall. Who’s the most mysterious of them all? (I just ran out of ideas ok? Please don’t hate)

Ne: I just remembered, I have to go to the bathroom. 

Tagged by:  @weasal mwah

Rules: Answer the questions and tag 20 blogs you want to get to know better

Nicknames: Many but one of my faves is Pistol”. My boss made some joke business cards with “Pistol” in my name. They are one of my prize possessions. BTW yes I’m American, no I don’t own any guns. 

Star sign: Scorpio and supposedly I’m a classic expression. 

Height: 5′4 and three quarters. 

Time right now: Noon

Last thing you googled: “Weather in Maui”

Fave music artist: Depends on the day. JS Bach, Miles Davis, Sarah Vaughan. No use asking me about pop because that changes constantly. 

Song stuck in my head:  Toto’s Africaaaaaa @gramjams damn you 

Last movie I watched: In cinema: Arrival - Amy Adams - watch it. On DVD/TV: Inglourious Basterds because we wanted to remember a time when Nazis were unequivocally evil. 

Last tv show I watched: Top Chef! Love drama and food. 

What I’m wearing right now: Jeans, fave Boston t shirt, wool hoodie, lumberjack plaid socks

When I created this blog: Hmmm 2016.

The kind of stuff I post: Women being badasses in all kinds of ways.

Do I get asks regularly?: Hardly. Mine is a sleepy blog. 

Why did I choose my url: Kiko - an actress whose life has mirrored mine in some ways (minus fame and supermodeling). Blue is my favorite color.

Gender: Garden variety lady (- line courtesy of @weasal thank you hahahah) 

Hogwarts House: I once took the quiz, it told me I was a Hufflepuff, even though I never was very into HP, somehow that was upsetting to me,,,

Pokémon team: Pokemon Go to the Polls (Hillary on the 2016 campaign trail, adorkable)

Favorite color: Blue

Average hours of sleep: 7

Lucky number: 13 and 4 (4 is considered bad luck in many Asian cultures)

Favorite characters: Liz Lemon is white me but a lot funnier and straighter, Clarke Griffin, Lexa, Lisbeth Salander, Princess Leia/Rey, Carol Aird, on and on…  

Dream job: I kind of have it now???

Number of blankets I sleep with: I like 2 but wife likes 4 which translates into occasional blanket wars. 

Tagging: @jkfukufan @kirochoi @employee645-a @quesandgays @cornchipmeteor @femslash-trash @q-parallel @rainboflg @pr1deandj0@tubeztheone @thesagaciousowl @almavivadreams @mechanicravenreyes (feel free to ignore, or anyone else, join in!)


2.5.17 Adult Coloring (29/100 days of productivity)

Another not so busy day at work turned into me, my boss, and my friends coloring and playing hangman for three hours. It was really cool and after work I kept at it and finished this owl in one day! I’m inspired to get some alcohol markers and break out the “adult” coloring book my roommate bought me last year. 

I’m really happy about this weekend. Sometimes moments just fall into place and I’m consistently happy and it’s always really good when it lasts for a few days! Even though I don’t like Pitt I think I’m beginning to make it work. Hanging out with my friends and escaping campus for a little while really helped and I’m hoping to do it again next weekend. 

Take a newspaper without acknowledging us? Expect a surprise

A bit of background - So I work at a Letting Agency/Mortgage Brokers, there are basically 2 businesses in our small office with my dad, the boss of both businesses, him being a mortgage broker with his friend Chris, who works from home and comes in on a Friday (important) and then there’s me and my female colleague Emily who work on the lettings side. The mortage brokers work in the back of the office, we work at the front of the office. (Important)

So basically we have the weekly newspaper delivered to us every Thursday. Now unlike most businesses, we just leave the pile at the display window in which people can come in and take a paper for free. We get weekly regulars who come in, politely ask for a paper as usual and I’ll say “yeah go ahead” with a smile, in which they’ll reply with a thank you. In comes middle-aged bitch.

Now this happened sometime late last year in which a middle-aged woman would come in every Friday, not acknowledge me or Emily at the front, take a paper, and just walk out, no thank you, no hi, nothing. It didn’t bother us really at first as we’ve had a couple of people do this but by their second visit they’d give us an hello and thank you.

Eventually it got to a point the one time in which as she walked out the door Emily shouted “you’re welcome!”. She gave us an evil look and didn’t say anything. This is what really p***ed us off.

Now comes a rainy Friday morning, Chris has arrived at the office (who only comes in on a Friday), he knows of this woman as we’ve brought her up to him before. We’re all in the mortgage brokers’ office at the back as I’m making tea for everyone, so there’s no one at the front.

Now as he’s getting his laptop out we all hear the door open, I had a quick glance and it was her. She didn’t see me as she was coming through the door. I quickly hid away and told everyone it was her.

At this point Chris told everyone to be quiet, I wondered what he was going to do, as soon as she picked up a paper he screamed at the top of his lungs “THIEF!”, the woman immediately shit herself and ran out the office. As she left we were all in stitches. The best being that she forgot her paper and hasn’t come in the office since.

Well played Chris, well played


Hey sweetheart,

   Let me tell you, Tiffany, I have never written a fucking letter for anyone. So what do you think? Well I’m thinking you are some fucking special.

 When we first met, I gotta be honest here, I was so fucking into you, what with the gorgeous blue hair, kick ass piercings and super hot body. You were acting all fucking brave, up in my face telling me not to touch a fucking hair on anyone in your little group. I was like, damn! This is one fucking feisty woman. And well, I was like 50% more into you then.

  And now, I just want to spend all my time with you baby. Simon’s all, fuck boss, we got business! Fuck him, you doll, are my business now. And I’m yours, if you’ll have me.

 I hope you like this little gift I got you. I know how you miss going to concerts, miss your fucking music, I get it. Took awhile, but I finally found one of these fuckers. Fat Joseph checked it out and it works fucking great.

 And I got myself a little gift. Go put it on, Tiffany. Show Daddy his gift! Mmhmm, baby girl! Maybe listen to some music, dance a little? I can show just how much I love you, you and me Tiffany, forever baby


Request: Nobody else

Request: Imagine Juice being jealous over his old lady’s boss who takes her to restaurants for business meetings and they fight. Juice leaves for the club but later on she goes there to make it right.

Originally posted by lonely-my-middle-name

I had been with Juan for almost a year. I loved him, he was everything to me, but his insecurities were always there, sometimes taking the best of him. Lately, he would get grumpy, every time I talked about my boss and if I had a business meeting. Those were always in restaurants, nice places to please the clients who were investing a lot of money in our company.

I was getting ready to another dinner when Juan arrived home. “Baby”, he called me, almost singing with happiness. I asked God for patience and walked downstairs. He must have heard the click of my heels, because Juan appeared at the end of the stairs, already frowning.

“Where are you going?”, he barked, crossing his arms.

“Business dinner”, I was wearing a nice dress, not revealing at all. It ended on my knees, definitely not so short.

“I just bought food”, Juan said between teeth, “Your favorite”

“Juan”, I sighed. I had been working for nearly five months and we already had had that fight a dozen times, “I would love to have dinner with you, but I have to go. Believe me, I would rather stay home”

“Then tell your boss this”, he hissed.

“You know that I can’t”, I pinched my nose, tired, “I’m new at the company, which is also new. We need as many clients as we can get right now”

“You keep coming up with this excuses”, he narrowed his eyes, whining like a kid, “You don’t really want to stop doing this. I guess you like the fancy restaurants, the attention…”

“You better stop right there Juan!”, I raised my voice, cutting him off, “Don’t you dare accusing me like this!”

We just glared at each other. I looked away to the clock. I was getting late.

“I’m going now. I’ll be back before ten, I think”, my tone was sad, I was so tired of that fights. I walked to my car and before leave I saw Juan standing at the door, jaw clenched, arms crossed.


I got home fifteen minutes past ten and all the lights were off. That was odd. Juan would always light up the entire place when he was alone. I parked at the driveway and walked inside the house.

“Juan?”, I called, but got no answer. I walked around and there was no sign of him. In the bedroom, there were no closet doors open or drawers. Juan would never leave a mess behind him, not even when he was running away. I opened the closet and his bag wasn’t there. On the drawers, a few boxers were missing. I sighed and grabbed my phone.

“Lass”, Chibs answered on the first ring, “Are you calling for Juicy boy?”

“Yeah, is he there?”, I walked downstairs again, grabbing my purse.

“Yes”, the Scotsman chuckled, “Hidden in one of the bedrooms”

“Thanks Chibs”, I hopped in my car, “I’m going to pick him up”


I parked my car at the clubhouse and marched inside. Boys looked up at me and Chibs pointed to the back of the club, guiding me to the bedroom where Juan was. I muttered a thank you and he left me alone. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

“Told you to leave me alone Chibby”, Juan groaned. He was laying on the bed, still fully dressed, looking at the ceiling with his hands over his chest.

“I’m not Chibs”, I closed the door behind me and Juan sat on bed. His eyes widened and his face lit up for a moment, but soon he was frowning again.

“What are you doing here?”, I noticed him looking me up and down, he would never hide how much he wanted me.

“I came to take my old man back home”, I walked towards him, done with that silly fight, “I want to-“, I held his shoulders, straddling him, “-cuddle with him, sleep on his arms”

Juan looked away, keeping his hands firmly on the bed. I sighed and got up, “I don’t care about the damn fancy restaurant or those people. I’m just trying to keep my job”. He looked up at me, paying attention, “Nobody ever treated me with less than respect and just for you to know, if it helps you to sleep, my boss’ wife was there. She had been traveling for the last month and now she back to work with us too”

He looked to floor, still not saying a word. I ran fingers through my hair and turned my back on him, “I’ll be at home”, I whispered. I was almost at the door when he wrapped his arms tight around me.

“I can’t lose you”, Juan whispered on my ear, his lips pressed on my skin.

“You won’t. Never”, I turned on his arms, wrapping mine around his neck. He pulled me closer and crushed his lips over mine in a possessive kiss. I caressed his scalp, keeping Juan close. We were both breathless as he rested his forehead against mine.

“I love you”, he whispered.

“I love you too Juan”, I cupped his face and looked inside his gorgeous brown eyes, “This dinners will be less frequent, as soon as the company is stable, and it’s doing good already. I’ll be all yours on the weekend baby”

“Promise?”, his eyes lit up and he smiled, happy.

“Promise”, I smiled back, “Can we go back home now?”

“Yes! Please!”, Juan groaned and grabbed his bag. He took my hand in his and we left the clubhouse, going back to our home.

au!meanie : texting part 2
  • mingyu: i cant fucking believe this shit
  • mingyu: i cant
  • mingyu: fUCKING
  • wonwoo: ok but wtf is wrong with u
  • wonwoo: mingyu u work at a gas station what could go wrong...
  • mingyu: remember soonyoung and jihoon? the other two guys working with me at that stupid gas station?
  • mingyu: well guess what bitch
  • wonwoo: yes go on
  • wonwoo: that must be hell
  • mingyu: its worse than hell
  • mingyu: you dont even want to know what kind of things i saw in that washroom
  • wonwoo: used condoms and blood everywhere
  • mingyu: i had to cover my nose with a rag it was THAT bad
  • wonwoo: jesus...
  • wonwoo: u know what
  • mingyu: what babe
  • wonwoo: wanna get some coffee and watch Me Before You?
  • wonwoo: my treat
  • mingyu: that sounds gay im in
  • wonwoo: bro..
  • mingyu: bro ily ill be ready in 5

Please fire me. I work in a bakery that specializes in custom cake decorating. I had a customer trying to order a cake and was thoroughly angered that I had not tried every cake flavor and every icing flavor in order to be able to advise her on which combination would be good for her 5 year old’s birthday cake. I’m sorry. We have over 40 cake flavors and 30 icing flavors, some of which I am allergic to. My boss wasn’t present, but she wanted the store business card so that she could call my boss the next day and complain about my incompetency.

it’s been one month...

today at the CLC, my boss and his boss (the education manager) came back from a business trip in New York, and apparently they spent a ton of time talking about how hardworking, fast-learning, and overall amazing I am at this job.  The education manager made a point of talking me up in front of the executive director of the whole center and also pulled me aside later to reiterate, again, how wonderful I am.

I will also be getting a jacket to replace the terrible onesie that I have to wear during space missions, which is a literal Blessing from Up Above.  The “flight suit” I’ve been using is a men’s XXL tall, so it’s enormous, and I also get crazy sweaty every time I wear it, and it immediately became the most dreaded part of this job for me.  So I’m just so relieved that I will only need to wear it occasionally from now on.

Last but not least, they will begin administering official training for operating the space missions.  this is good not only because people will get a uniform understanding of how everything works, but also because we will get raises for each certification we earn (there are two).  Idk what the raise amount is but honestly anything is better than nothing and I’m just so pleased right now

Let me light it for you...

“You know. They say smoking’s Bad for you kitty cat.” Yuko smiled as he sat with Music on the roof of a building, overlooking the cities’ shopping district. It was their meet up place, their ‘date site’ if you would.

Music smiled at the wolf next to him, holding out a cigarette, blowing smoke up into the cloudy sky. “Says the demon who smokes a damn pipe all day. What do you have to say about that?”

Yuko simply snorted. “It’s a good pipe. Not the bad stuff like you have there.” He blew smoke up as well, creating a large circle with his own puff. “But.. how have things been?”

“Well, they’ve been getting busy lately. The head bosses want my squad to do this and that and even another thing all in the same day.” He sighed. “I’m just… glad I can relax now. Especially now that I’m with you.” He smirked, knowing the wolf would look away and keep his eyes from his now.

“Whatever you say Music…. whatever you say.” The wolf mumbled, putting his hand in the cat’s.