Headcannons that no one asked for

-Richie loses his voice

-Richie talks a lot and he’s incredibly loud

-so it’s not much of a surprise when he shows up to school with his voice gone

-ofc he tries to talk

-but eventually he gives up bc his voice is so raspy and would give out every other word

-when the losers find out, they’re all celebrating

-“finally I can hear myself think-“ “sh- *cough* the fuckkk up Stan *voice crack* ley”

-Richie doesn’t know what to do with his life ???

-what was his purpose if he wasn’t constantly yelling about how he banged Eddies mom or asking absurd questions during class ???

-he ends up pretty much silent all day and everyone is so concerned

-his teachers are just like ??? U okay Richie ??

-he just shrugs and does his work

-it’s depressing to look at

-after school the losers all go to the barrens

-and it’s oddly quiet without Richie keeping a constant flow of conversation

-none of the losers has had to say beep beep Richie since yesterday and it’s WEIRD

-Richie’s in a bad mood all day bc he can’t stand not being able to annoy Stan or call Eddie any of his nicknames

-Bevs the first to notice and she brings it to attention

-Richie tries to wave them off but Mike speaks up and says that Richie looked sad all day

-Richie just sighs loudly and dramatically

-then he goes into a coughing fit bc damn that hurt

-Eddie huffs and tells him to cough into his arm

-Richie doesnt

-he just coughs more in Eddies direction for a solid minute

-Eddie gets tf up and l e a v e s

-fuck this shit I’m out