not emotionally prepared

“I got pregnant when I was twenty-two. It wasn’t planned. The father and I weren’t even in a relationship. But I thought I could handle it on my own. I felt like a modern woman. I was in law school. I wanted to be a diplomat. But oh man, it was hard. I wasn’t emotionally prepared to deal with it. Society doesn’t treat the child of an unwed mother like a blessing. When you’re married and pregnant, people come up and ask all kinds of questions: ‘Is it a boy? Is it a girl? How are you feeling?’ But that doesn’t happen when you’re single. People saw me getting fatter, but everyone avoided the subject. Instead they asked each other: ‘What happened? Do you know anything?’ I felt invisible. I dropped out of law school because I felt so ashamed. Thankfully a few close friends carried me through. My daughter is eighteen now. Everything turned out fine. But I wish I could have enjoyed my pregnancy more.”

(Rio de Janeiro, Brazil)

Reactions to Falling in Love (Check Moon)

Aries: Excited. Of course there’s always that underlying feeling of nervousness, but overall they really feel the rush of life! There’s always these questions in the head asking things like “I wonder what they’re doing now? How would they react to this? I wonder what they do in their free time?” 

Taurus: Hesitant. Although this may seem unlikely for an earth sign like Taurus, they only act like this because they KNOW that they’d give their absolute all if the person they’re attracted to happens to really be the one for them. The hesitance functions as a safeguard, to protect themselves from devoting themselves to something not worth it. 

Gemini: Curious. It’s not exactly typical of a gemini to fixate themselves on a single person, so usually when it does happen to them they feel the need to answer why. Why is their mind stuck on this single person? What makes them different from those of the past?

Cancer: Cautious. The emotional hypersensitivity that comes with Cancers in their own placement causes them to feel a profound sense of desire and fear at the same time. They romanticize the idea of love because too often they adore the concept of devoting their existence to someone as opposed to the actual action. This could be rooted in a frail heart or in a past, sour relationship. Either way, they aren’t the one to act on their emotions, but linger on them for a bit.

Leo: Interrupted. It is easy to admire a Leo, for their ability to control and lead a variety of situations that they fall into, so that is why love is not exactly an issue they do best in. When it comes to attraction, too often the person one loves is also the person they cannot have. This could result in frustration.

Virgo: Soft. Virgo love the security and safety that comes in a structured lifestyle, but sometimes even for them it can get a bit restrictive. When they fall in love, it’s like the way people save a picture for a later time to look at. They keep that thought of love in a special place in their heart for when they need to think about it in darker times. 

Libra: Consumed. Libra are very much partnership-oriented, so when they come across a person who could fulfill that image of the ideal relationship, it can become an all-consuming topic in their head. Even if it annoys them, they can’t help but come back to the question they’ve been pondering about their entire life: “What if they’re the one?”

Scorpio: Stuck. Scorpio love the idea of rising above and living above emotions that would limit one’s potential, and for too many of the times love happens to be one of those emotions. When they feel this love, they can could feel speechless, or simply unable to handle the situation and the emotional weight that comes with it. This could make them come off as awkwardly reclusive, or too forthcoming. 

Sagittarius: Composed. Sagittarius tend to see things in the big picture, so when it comes to matters of romance they attempt to not make it a central thought in their mind, and a lot of the times it works. They understand there’s more to life than love, and if their comes a time when that love becomes obstructive they emotionally prepare themselves to cut it off. 

Capricorn: Anxious. The calm and professionalism they evoke is often a deceptive layer for the emotional storm that lies beneath, and this causes love to make them nervous, even frightened. They’re aware that love also entails an established bond grounded in vulnerability, and it is precisely that vulnerability that scares them to death. The vision of love is their dream, but the pain of secrecy and rejection is their reality. 

Aquarius: Apathetic. Aquarius try not to care about emotions, and surely aren’t exactly the first to act upon those emotions. Analytical and with an open mind, they value the freedom that could come with being alone, so they attempt to brush off any emotions which could jeopardize that freedom. However, the possibility of coming back to that place of a possible love is often a road taken by them. 

Pisces: Weightless. While most people could feel like their falling, Pisces moon may feel like they’re unwillingly being launched off the ground. This often results from a mix of anxiety and excitement as with most signs, but they also have a especially rosy perception of love. Because they tend to be sentimental, they may not have the most realistic outlook on what love’s supposed to be, ignoring the compromise and sacrifices that come with any successful relationship. 

living on this plane of existence has been nice and all but i think i’m ready for one of the greek gods (i’m thinking dionysus, or perhaps aphrodite) to ask me to be their mortal consort and whisk me off to mt. olympus when i accept, only to be confronted by the facts of my mortality when i eventually age and die, and finally to place me among the stars and create a new constellation as a memorial to our relationship and an honor to my soul

  • My human brain: Jesse watched his mentor put his entire team at risk and is probably confused and hurt by Gabe's decisions, and is about to watch Overwatch fall apart around him. Gabe is grieving over the loss of life caused by Talon and probably feels like that was the only solution, but was probably aware that in doing so he'd put Overwatch (his family) in jeopardy and will now have to live with the consequences of that. This is some really heavy stuff that I was not emotionally prepared for.
  • My monkey brain: Lucio's light-up pants GOOD.