not wanting to put a burden on him

🍩 reblog // I feel so guilty all the time

I feel like I am the most manipulative nagging annoying bitch in the fucking universe.
All I do is demand my boyfriend’s attention and whine when I don’t get what I want.
I’m so tired of being too much.
He insists that I’m not, that he loves me, that he doesn’t “put up” with me.
I know he loves me. But love won’t stop him from getting sick of me.
He’s borderline too so he gets it but I’m so scared that one day he’ll just be done.
I love him more than anything in the world. He says he loves me even more. But I can’t help but feel like a burden all the time.
And none of it is his fault. I grew up “under the gaslight”. My emotional needs got ignored and mocked. They still do. So I have no idea how to ask for what I want or need without feeling guilty.
I am so angry and so sad and so lonely and so tired but I can’t sleep.
If anyone read this far, you’re pretty ❤️

things i want min yoongi to realize:- 

  • he needs to put him self first
  • he is human; therefore he doesn’t need to be perfect
  • he is a kind and precious person
  • he doesn’t need to beat himself up
  • he shouldn’t ever feel burdened 
  • crying doesn’t make you weaker or make you lose
  • ARMYs will support and stand by him no matter what
  • ARMYS love him alot
  • ARMYS love him alot
  • ARMYS love him alot
Why Stanford isn’t a total butt.

-Child!Ford’s giggle.
-badass polydactylism.
-Child!Ford’s obsession with pirate ghosts and aztec treasure.
-Child!Ford helped Stanley up after Stanley ran into their nightstand.
-Child!Ford’s awesome jacket and the fact he always kept a notebook around so he could literally at any moment write something down he sees weird that adorable dork.
-felt bad when the principal praised him and insulted Stanley.
-agreed to go with Stanley anyways if the college didn’t let him in.
-put his family’s financial security over what he probably really wanted.
-had to bear the burden of being their family’s only chance at money.
-had to listen to his father diss on Stanley after he left.
-is a genius and got a PhD earlier than normal.
-is technically a doctor; Dr. Pines.
-is a cute nerdling.
-raised the shapeshifter as his alien demon child.
-had the fate of the universe on his shoulders.
-is a freaking genius who designed/built an interdimensional portal that looks cool as hell.
-spent 30 years in sci-fi sideburn land and still lookin’ fresh (his mind, on the other hand…)
-that giant ass rifle he had on his back when he returned.
-that grunkle chest (seriously, Stanley’s chub is cute but Ford is flat and muscular).
-didn’t know that Stanley was living in his car and probably would’ve offered help had Stanley asked.
-trusted Stanley with his prized possession and the key to stopping the apocalypse.
-felt bad when he burned Stanley and apologized before Stanley punched him.
-owned Stanley’s ass when they fought after he returned; didn’t try to hurt Stanley, only subdued him and held his hands back.
-have you seen how freaking little his shoulders are compared to Stanley’s? Ford confirmed little nerd man.
-he smiles whenever the kids talk to him; smiled when Dipper said he’d read his journals; said he liked Mabel.
-is a badass with guns.
-eventually gives Mabel a journal and a crossbow (SDCC trailer).
-is an older Dipper because nerd but also older Mabel because sweater.
-is staying down in the basement to contain everything escaping from the portal; confirmed badass.
-J.K Simmons; no other reason needed.
-adjusts his glasses all the time.
-fluffy eyebrows.
-fluffy kitten hair.
-is a badass like Mabel by wearing sweaters in the Summer.
-dat turtleneck.
-dat trench coat.
-dat glorious strut out of the portal.
-dat classy silver stripe in his hair.
-the fact that Dipper and Mabel (not knowing it was his room) called his room ‘classy’ because as we all know Ford is classy as fuck.
-did I mention he’s classy?

And if none of these convinced you, there’s one last thing we all need to remember. Any of you who’ve followed me since the twin theory days know what I’m going to say next:




When people say,
“God doesn’t give you
more than you can handle,”
I want to grab them by the collar,
slap their smug, silly faces
and respond,
“Yes. I’m glad God was so confident
in Sharon Tate’s resolve
and the inner strength
of the people in Auschwitz.
What tipped Him off, I wonder,
that they were strong enough
to handle their burdens?”

Why do we always feel the need
to put a determinist gloss
on all the nasty business
that happens on this planet?
If “everything happens for a reason”
or “everything happens the way it’s supposed to”
then God is some kind of sadistic madman
and everything is “supposed to be”
a complete and total mess.
Everything does not happen
the way it’s supposed to
and everything is not going to be okay.

God doesn’t give a good goddamn
whether your football team wins
or that you find the parking spot you want
or if some lunatic kidnaps you,
imprisons you in a dungeon
and tortures you for eighteen years.
Nobody is coming to save you
and the only one responsible
for your health, well being and safety
is you.

Now, don’t get me wrong,
I’m not saying that God doesn’t exist.
In some kind of crazy, inextricable way
it does.
Everything in this universe
IS interconnected
and loves and breathes
and moves and hurts
as one.
But it isn’t keeping score
and it isn’t in charge
and it isn’t pulling the strings.
We are.

How long is it going to take
for us to realize
that God is a responsibility,
not a savior?

So we can’t blame God
for all the fucked-up shit
we do to each other.
We own that.
It’s ours.
And we can’t sit around
waiting for him or her or it

or God

to make us happy.
To make us whole.

Because it isn’t
gong to happen.



Max Mundan, (Ir)responsible

© David Rutter 2015

Purchase my new book, “Everyone is Broken”, by clicking HERE!

Darkness Is You
  • Darkness Is You
  • Rosie (Original Song)
  • Beasts & Burdens

Darkness Is You - Rosie (Original Song)

Sooo, this is my first song that was inspiried by ‘Teen Wolf’, or more inspired by Stiles & whatever it is that’s inside him. English is not my first language so it can be that the lyrics are a bit messed up. I am also still working a bit on the melody, because I want to put a chance in it but this is the first version.

If you enjoy it, please like or reblog this post, so others can see it and most of all so I know that you like it. :)

Do you want to listen to more songs? Go here!

This whole “Robert is never first in anyone’s affections” thing is actually SO REAL tho, this has got to be his BIGGEST insecurity IN HIS ENTIRE LIFE

  • Jack blatantly preferred Andy, he just did. He kept Andy in the loop on things he excluded Robert from, he forgave Andy for mistakes more easily, he was proud of Andy whereas he put down Robert.. it was a mess!
  • I mean, Jack CHOSE Andy to be his child–and Robert was just a product of nature, not at all chosen. Robert is a forced burden on Jack. He’s not #1 at all. 
  • Even when coming back from the village, Robert feels he’s not #1 in Chrissie’s affections because she is so involved in where her father wants to live etc. He has to TRICK Lawrence into accepting him so that Chrissie can be with him, it’s actually SAD???
  • And Diane, WOW, Diane. She struggled a bit, but really in the end, she chose to give Andy Jack’s ring without making SURE to talk to Robert, and that’s just SAD. He isn’t first in Diane’s affections either. Everyone chooses Andy’s side.
  • Even when he opened up to Aaron about this ring situation, Aaron chose Andy’s side, and that HURT Robert (cue Robert being the worst kind of asshole in response)
  • Then Donny comes into the village, and he’s SO upset that he’s not Chrissie’s #1–suddenly, even tho he has Aaron and doesn’t care about Lachlan like a son, he still feels INSECURE that someone else is being picked over him for father-son things and neglects Aaron to deal with that Donny/Chrissie mess. Donny was stealing the only spot Robert had where he felt like he was #1
  • THAT’S one MAJOR reason why Chrissie mattered so much (in addition to all the comforts & goals achieved that came with that lifestyle)–she made him feel like her number one!! 
  • And just like Faiza’s mum was saying, this is YET again a time where Robert feels like he’s not important in someone’s life. He’s working SO hard to get with Aaron, he finally has it, he can’t believe he lucked out this much and–!! it’s gone as soon as he got it. Aaron’s busy with Liv. And that’s fair, he has a right to that, and I stand by that.
  • But Robert’s got baggage. 30 years of baggage, of being rejected, of always being second best–hell, less than that! and it’s going to twist him up inside and make him petty and mean about this all, I can see this happening immediately. 
  • Robert NEEDS someone to make it LOUD & CLEAR that he is at the top of their affections. He NEEDS Aaron to make it known that, yes, he loves Liv, and all his family, but that robert is PART of that love–he’s not ranked beneath them, he’s loved JUST AS MUCH as them!! ROBERT NEEDS THIS OK!!?!
Don't Wake Me

The nightmares started up again; the ones of his mother slowly losing her mind. Sometimes they were memories, but sometimes they were even more frightening exaggerations that had Stiles waking up screaming. Because of him his dad was losing sleep and was too worried to leave him alone.

However the mere suggestion of a babysitter frustrated and annoyed Stiles. “I can take care of myself,” he argued stubbornly to his father.

The man sighed heavily and said, “I know, kid. This is for my peace of mind.”

Stiles’ shoulders sagged in defeat. Now he felt guilty for putting this burden on his dad. Really, he only has attacks after he wakes up from a dream but apparently his dad didn’t want to take any chances.

So starting today, after school, he was going to be picked up and taken home by Derek Hale. He was going to ride in a car with Cora Hale. That wasn’t his idea of a good time; Stiles is convinced she hates him. He wonders if her scary older brother will hate him too.

After all, Derek’s only doing it to get paid, it’s not like he actually cares about what’s going on with him. According to Stiles, anyway. But his dad told him that Derek knows all about anxiety and panic attacks, and triggers. Somehow Stiles still doubted it.

“I swear to god Scott, you better play games with me or something online during like, the entire day. I don’t want to be stuck watching documentaries or something with Derek.”

“Documentaries?” Scott questioned.

“You know, dumb stuff adults like to watch.”

His best friend rolled his eyes at him. Traitor. “He could like baseball, just like you. You never know.”

“And if he does he’s probably a Yankees fan,” Stiles retorted.

“Look,” Scott sighed. “You’re going to be stuck with him until your dad thinks it’s okay to start leaving you home alone again. You gotta make the best of it, man.”

“You’re a horrible friend,” Stiles grumbled.


Disappointment. It’s bound to come. When our dreams are shattered, it’s only natural to feel let down. Life doesn’t always turn out the way we want it to, but there’s a key reaction in this verse, and it tells us how to respond to disappointment: Hope in God! Next time you face discouragement, try this: Take all of your heartache, all of your burden and pain, and give it to the Lord. Let him have it! Tell him exactly how you feel. He already knows, anyway. Then, put your hope in God, for he is trustworthy. He has the power to change your situation. He can take your turmoil and turn it into something good. Praise him.

And what a kiss it was. O’Donoghue and Morrison put so much desperation and vulnerability into that moment. It was raw and intimate and absolutely devastating in its emotion. And when Hook said his last goodbye, you could see his struggle not to tell her he loved her, even if this was his last chance to do so. He didn’t want to burden her with that knowledge if he was going to die. He already knew he was breaking his promise to survive so she wouldn’t have to lose anyone else, and you could see him not wanting to make it harder for her after he’s gone by telling her he loves her.
—  (x)
BTS Reaction to you finally confessing about your depression and/or bipolarity (By possible admin)

This possible admin will be called P.A. Mer

-Admin Kat

All possible admin work will be completely unedited

Jin: You wouldn’t want to tell him about your depression as you didn’t want to burden him. But one night when he decided to come over and cook for you, you couldn’t help but feel useless. He was putting his career at risk by going out with you, and it didn’t help with what you thought of yourself, unworthy of his love. He would instantly notice the way you were acting around him, careful and reserved. He would sigh and drop down the utensils he was holding before pulling you in close. He forced you to look at him and would be instantly shocked to see the tears pooling in your eyes. You would quietly whisper,“ I’m sorry”, before something like a dam broke and you would tell him everything. How you thought you were petty. He would hold you close, running s hand through your hair, comforting you. “I still love you (Y/N), this doesn’t change anything. I’m sorry if I made you feel inadequate”, he would whisper in a voice choked with emotions. 

Originally posted by jeonggu

Suga: You knew that BTS had returned to their dorm after spending months promoting their new album. You would decide to pay a visit to Suga and when you opened the door to their dorm, you were greeted with enthusiastic hugs and greetings. As you made your way to Suga’s room, you knocked once then again when there was no reply. Stepping in, you took note of how peaceful he looked when he was sleeping. Walking over to his bed and sitting down tentatively, you would run a hand through his now-brown hair. And just like all of the other times where the two of you would be together and he fell asleep, you would confess everything to him again. You couldn’t remember how many times you’d told him everything about your depression and how bad it was. How the scars on your wrists weren’t from a cat you’d found in an alley. And when you were done telling him about how you missed him when he was away but didn’t call him everyday because you felt bothersome, you didn’t have time to comprehend how you were lying on your back, under him. He looked at you with sad eyes and said,“Never again. You’re never going to go through all of that again. You hear me, (Y/N)?" 

Originally posted by jinkooks

Hoseok: He would walk in when you were crying to yourself, arms wrapped tightly around your torso rocking your body back and forth in an order to calm yourself down. He had come home early to surprise you but didn’t waste any time in walking over to you and bending down to gather you in his arms. You would realise what was happening and would look at him with shocked eyes. "How?”, you would ask him when he’s deposited you on your bed and was kneeling in front of you. He would then ask all the questions that had been plaguing his mind. He already had his doubts and you confirmed them for him. E would sigh and look at you with worried eyes, saying, “I’m sorry I couldn’t be there for you earlier. I thought you’d like your space, but you are not going to put yourself through all that. Talk to me, okay? I’m here for you. I love you.” You would tear up at that and sob into his chest as he held you close. In an attempt to lighten the mood he would say, “You don’t only have to talk to me because I love you. I’m also your hope, your angel”, you would let out a laughing and he would hold you closer. 

Originally posted by jhopies

Namjoon: He had taken your hands in his, your fingers easily curling around his. He held them there, rubbing his thumb, until the time you were done speaking. When he pulled his hand away, and panic started settling inside you, an apology already on your tongue, to turn your hand up, palm wise to stare at the scars on your wrists. He ran his thumbs hesitantly over your scars before he sighed and pulled you towards him. He held you close and rocked the two of you slightly, whispering in a hoarse voice,“Thank you for letting me know” before cupping your face to make you look at him and saying,“But please don’t harm yourself. I don’t care if it’s 3 in the night, if you feel low, you can call me. I’m always going to be here. Okay?”, he said pressing a kiss to your forehead and wrapping his arms tighter around you. 

Talking to Jimin about this wasn’t easy. He too would hit a low at times and you would try to cheer him up. So you felt that you needed to be strong for both of you. When he found you crying one day, he would ask you what had happened and you would just brush it away. He would then observe you carefully and when one day, he walks up to you and asks you, “Do you suffer from depression, jagi?”, you couldn’t help but feel embarrassed and look down at you hands. You would hear him sigh, and expected something callous but when you felt a pair of arms hug you from behind, you would realise that he was okay with this. That he was okay with being the one to lend you support and it it was okay. “You don’t have to be strong for anyone but yourself, okay?”, he would then walk you to the couch and sit you down, quietly talking to you about when it had started and how you’d been coping with it.

Taehyung: Taehyung, you felt, was like a child. Sweet and caring. He didn’t deserve to be burdened by your problems. So when he walks over to you and asks you seriously,“Am I overwhelming?”, he would then raise your journal that was in his hands as an answer to your confused expression. You eyes would widen at that and you could feel the worry creeping back in, you knew that he was going to break up with you. Who would want to stay with a person who panicked about everything and thought so little of themselves. When he held you against his taller frame, you let out a breath you realised you hadn’t been holding in. He would run a hand through your hair as say,“I want to be here for you (Y/N). Let me take care of you too”, in a pained voice.

Jungkook: You thought he wouldn’t, shouldn’t, care. Whenever he was with you, you always felt happy, free even. When he left on tour or for promotions, that time was the hardest. There was no one to who you could seek comfort from, physical or emotional. So what you looked up from your couch to a shout of your name, you hurried to wipe your tear streaked face. You would tell him in a weak voice that you were fine and that it was nothing but when he would persist, you would have an emotional breakdown in front of him and spill out everything that bothered you. He would listen to you patiently, only offering you physical comfort, which you sought out to, and when you were done, he made you look at him and leaned his forehead against yours. “You’re not bothersome. At all. I don’t want you to think like that ever again. I’m sorry that I couldn’t be there for you earlier but (Y/N) I want to be there for you. Even if I’m not here, you can always depended on me. I won’t let you down”, he would talk to you in a soft voice, like one does while explaining a child something and you would nod your head and sniffle once more as he kisses your forehead and holds you gently against his well built frame.

Dean’s arc this season is very internal and very emotional, as opposed to seasons past where what the stories were building toward were showdowns with a “big bad.” What are the added challenges in that?

“Really the big bad hasn’t come to fruition yet. I believe it will; I believe they’re building towards that, and we’re going to start to see it in the next few episodes. So that being said, I think this is his cross to bear right now; this is his burden; this is what he has to deal with. And he’s always internalized a lot of things, which drives his brother crazy because Sam wants to be there to help, but if Dean doesn’t allow him to help or tell him what’s going on, he’s really left out in the cold. So even though Dean is trying to put on a brave face and face this thing, like he faces most adversity, he really knows that he doesn’t have a clue on how to fight it. We will see in upcoming episodes Dean saying, "Look, there’s nothing we can do about it, so we might as well get back to business as usual.” And that is really his attempt at saying, “Look Sam, there’s nothing you can do; there’s nothing I can do; and we might as well do something that we’re good at until I can’t do that anymore.” It’s a bit of a steady decline— a slow deterioration— for Dean. It’s a ticking time bomb, and we’re really starting to realize there’s no way to put the fuse out.

- Jensen on Dean not being out of the woods by a long shot (x)

I am sorry, because all of these have probably already made the rounds, but I am just really excited about reading these quotes now, because once again I am just mesmerized and so in love with how well Jensen knows Dean and the way he talks about him. It’s just…. it’s one of my favourite things: Hearing Jensen talk about Dean. :’)

Don’t get me wrong: I do wanna see more movies with empowered women and men playing the traditional women’s role in action movies.


I feel like people don’t know about Jaune Arc, who lied on his transcripts to get into a combat school, filled with women (and men) all more skilled than him.

Who can’t talk to girls because he has no experience with them, other than his 7 sisters (who are most likely all older than him). And puts on such a face of confidence that it regularly backfires on him.

Who didn’t know who the pretty girl was, the highest ranked fighter in another nation; but liked her as a person first and foremost.

Who ended up on a team with her and still saw her as a great friend - one he didn’t want to burden with his failings.

Who never put this well known, powerful fighter on the pedestal that everyone else did.

Who looked shocked when said girl snapped at him, but then asked what /he/ did to upset her, not what her issue was.

Who brushed off a comment of her getting a partner to a dance party with “if you don’t arrive with a date to the dance, I’ll wear a dress.”
And when she does, he leaves. Only to keep his word and come back in a strapless dress.

Who openly admits that he is weaker than his (mostly female) friends.

Who, knowing how bad he can be, tried to follow his friend into a fight because he KNOWS that the fight would take her life.
And when his friend trapped him to save his life, called the main protagonist to go save his friend. Calls a girl at least 2 years his junior because he knows she can do what he can’t.

And it breaks my heart that this poor boy doesn’t get some of the recognition he should.

I hate being like this, I hate wanting to tear my skin off and disappear everyday. Mainly because it’s unfair on him, he deserves someone who is carefree and doesn’t put a huge burden on him. He makes me so so so happy, I don’t want to be sad anymore, I wish I could be alright.

anonymous asked:

Okay, but can you talk to me about a Seven who finds out the MC really IS like him? Hiding a lot of deep and dark behind a smile and kind, silly words?

This makes Seven feel very at ease that they’re like him. They can help eachother through all the things that they’ve been hiding. Seven isn’t the type to open up. He doesn’t like having to put someone through the burden of having to worry about him, comfort him. He feels annoying. But the way that MC is helps him, because they’re alike. They open up to him, he opens up to them. If they’re hiding something, he can tell and get it out of them. If he’s hiding something, the same goes. It can be a slow process, but it’s completely worth it. Soon they’re not even just talking about problems, but their dreams together, what they want for the future. They’re both impatient as if they’re 16 year olds, and all he wants is to spend the rest of his life with them.

anonymous asked:

If you do pros and cons can you do pros and cons of dating woozi


  • super dedicated to what he does and hardworking
  • cute without trying 
  • wears oversized jumpers
  • and you get to wear them too!
  • composes and sings for you 
  • has a very  very nice voice
  • plays guitar, piano and who knows what other instruments 
  • kind hearted
  • will try to be protective of you 
  • will defend you and stick up for what he believes 


  • probably won’t display much public affection since he’s shy
  • if you’re taller than him bye tbh
  • work might consume him sometimes
  • poor baby
  • is the type to not share his burdens with you 
  • so he’ll most likely endure his hardships himself :(

I hope you like this! Just want to put the disclaimer out there that I don’t know any of the members in Seventeen or anyone in Kpop personally so I don’t know their true personalities. This is all just based on what I think and what I’ve gathered from variety shows and stuff :) Keep requesting these tho cos I had fun writing this :) 

Clarke knew. She knew that was it. She wanted him. She needed him. But they needed each other in the way that they just did better together. They could live separately and be fine. Neither of them would shrivel and die apart from the other, he did so much more work in a few days in camp helping to get people motivated than she could have done. And she certainly spent those days in solitude, trying to figure out how to live with her choices and he’d let her leave again and walk the forest to exorcise her demons. But she thought back to those days and realized it hadn’t done anything for her. Bellamy gave her another option: with him she could live and even smile. She wasn’t forgetting what she’d done, he just made it easier to live with, putting things in perspective and sharing the weight. God knows she wanted to share the burden now, she was ready for that.
—  something to hold onto, by crystalkei

I’ve been seeing a lot of ‘Matt wants to be with Elektra because he says he wants to run away with her’ and ‘He only goes back to Karen because Elektra died’. So I wanted to add my two cents into the mix of this debate and explain how I saw these 2 very different relationships.

While I do believe Matt had intense feelings for Elektra, after analyzing their interactions, it is clear that they were never going to be together. Matt’s initial reaction to her sudden reappearance in his life was very obvious. He didn’t want to take her back or in his life at all, for that matter. But as the weight of the trial began burdening his shoulders and the stress of having to balance his duel identities overwhelmed him, he began to relish the nights he spent with Elektra. He didn’t have to worry about hiding his identity from her and they could freely discuss everything without keeping secrets. While Foggy knows about his secret identity, he doesn’t fully understand why he puts on the suit and patrols the streets by night. Elektra not only knows he’s Daredevil but accepts and understands it. Matt can open up and talk to her in a way that he can’t with Foggy.

But he’s not in love with her. People are interpreting their last scene together as him declaring his love for her. He proclaims he wants to be with her, no matter what. He’ll leave New York, and everyone in it, behind just to be by her side. To me this isn’t a declaration of love. They’re in a desperate, deadly situation. He doesn’t believe they’re both going to make it out of there alive. And because Elektra is the Black Sky, he believe he’s the one who is going to be slain. So in what he believes might be his final few moments, he says the one thing he knows will make Elektra happy. He knows that’s what she wanted all along so he promises her the world. I don’t know if you’ve ever been by someone’s side as they’re dying but when they’re in pain, you want to do anything you can to make them feel better. You promise things you know you will never have to keep, as terrible as that sounds. When he’s gone he wants Elektra to believe their future together would have been a happy one. Not to mention Matt has always been a martyr and willing to put everyone’s happiness above his own.

But when it comes down to it, he would never have been able to leave Hell’s Kitchen. It’s a part of who he is. The ache he would feel by abandoning his home would be too much for him. It’s his city, as he’s so often stated. He could never leave.

The final scene of the season is what, to me, confirms he’s been in love with Karen for a long time. I don’t think he even acknowledges the depths of his feelings for her until that moment, when he reveals his identity. What I want to stress here is that no one is making him reveal that he is Daredevil. He has gone to her, of his own accord, and revealed himself to her. There is no danger, no accidental unmasking in a fight. He consciously chose to tell her. Why would he do this unless he was in love with her? He could have continued on as he was but he couldn’t keep this secret from her anymore. This shows that his brief time with Elektra changed him deeply. He realised he could never truly be happy in a relationship if his identity was a secret. He needs to be himself, fully and free. He is Matthew Murdock and Daredevil; they are one and the same. So he goes to Karen and exposes himself, hoping she will take him as he is and accept him. He wants to be with Karen truly and wholeheartedly, with no secrets or lies between them. Whether Karen forgives him for his lies is another thing, but it’s clear that Matt Murdock is in love with Karen Page.

Humanity and Titan

In the end every human need some sacrificial lamb, need someone else to put the blame, need someone to throw responsibility at..they want to run away from the responsibility the burden the sin..

Remember when Shadis deliberately throw the burden of being a commander to Erwin?

From that moment Erwin already a sacrificial lamb.

He carry all the burden all the sin from all fallen soldier, and no he did not want to die he still want to see the world free from all titans and to proof his father theory is correct, but he still carry all the burden.

In chapter 80, Levi relieve all the burden by telling him to die, he release Erwin from all the responsibility from all his burden and sin. Thus, Erwin already prepare to die he already decide to make the sacrifice for humanity..and thats why we saw his pure smile.

Still humans are selfish, only think about them self, Levi already knew Erwin will die but when he saw Erwin still alive all he can think only he wants Erwin to be alive again, completely different from his words, again human are selfish.

But he decided not to inject Erwin, because he knew Erwin already decided he already make the decision, Levi help him to decide.

And as far as i know from the spoiler, Levi is the only person who is not selfish, who act like the decent human being.

I’m trying to think like Isayama sensei, trying to see what he’s trying to say in the new chapter, he always say that humanity is ugly, maybe he want to show the good side and the bad side of humanity in the new chapter.

As for Armin, i feel pity of him, he too already decided to sacrifice himself, he already prepared to die and he hope that Eren would continue his sacrifice but no Eren selfishly want him to live to save the humanity, if he want Armin to save the humanity what is the point of all fallen soldier who save his ass when he got captured, Eren just want Armin to be alive just for the sake of himself.

Armin is a nice character, although he knew Bertold is colossal titan he still think of him as a person, i wonder how he felt when he knew he ate Bertold just for the sake of him living.

Scouting Legion is a mess now, no one could united them, after this will be the most crucial time for them, after they learn the truth they have to somehow reunited again.

From my opinion, eating Bertold is a loss for scouting legion as well as Hanji’s urge to kill Reiner, as far as i know Bertold and Reiner is the source of information they could use to gather more info about the titan shifter and beast titan.

Again we see the ugly side of humanity, fill of emotion and anger, but who could blame them.

After trying to figure everything out ( i could be wrong of course ) it’s starting to make sense, at least to put my broken heart at ease for a while until i see the full chapter.

“Why would you not tell me about this?” “Did you really think there was anything you could put in this window to keep me from helping you?” These two quotes of Lucas’s from Rileytown continually catch me, more and more each time I rewatch the episode. He was so obviously upset that Riley had kept something from him; it’s so clear the way she feels and what’s happening in her life has become of a lot of value to him. Not knowing what’s going on with her, especially when it’s something that is potentially really hurting her, causes to Lucas become extremely upset, pissed off even. I really want a scene between Riley and Lucas, only Riley and Lucas, about the aftermath of Texas/New Year’s. I want Lucas to express how upset he is that Riley lied to him about her feelings for him, and I want Riley to come back with the excuse that she just wanted Maya to be happy, and that she didn’t want to put the burden of how upset she was onto anyone else. I want Lucas to come back at her with what he said in Rileytown, that he doesn’t understand why she is constantly coming to them when they need help, but doesn’t ask for help when she needs it. He has now learned that she’s a girl who is extremely good at hiding how upset she truly is. I want Lucas to be hurt that she hadn’t felt like she could come to him with this, the way she had been visibly hurt when Lucas’s secret had only partially been revealed in SOL. I don’t want them to have a fullblown argument, but this situation is a big deal, and it’s something that will throw their emotions even more into a loop. They’ve always been so good at talking to one another, but they haven’t talked much lately about the most important thing between them; their feelings. The way they feel for one another and how much they care about the other’s wellbeing has been showcased to us in many different ways, in many different episodes, and I want to see that dynamic come back for the aftermath of New Year’s.


Today in Uni we had a super boring presentation, so naturally my mind wandered and I came up with a theory for what’s going to be happening throughout the rest of 5B!!

Okay, so my theory is that Regina is responsible for whatever state Killian is in in this picture:

This is why Dark Swan is so pissed with Regina (”Now life is precious to you?”).  I know people have guessed that Emma is taking something out of Killian, but what if instead she’s putting something into him!?  I think that she might be using Excalibur to transfer some of the Dark One’s magic into Killian in order to keep him alive, and it works, so now Emma is literally sharing the burden of the darkness with him (this would have been foreshadowed nicely in 5x04!!).  So that leaves Emma’s family and why Dark Swan is so pissed at them.  My bet is that, now that they have Excalibur and the dagger in Camelot, they’re going to want to reunite it and use it to get rid of the darkness.  But wait!  The darkness is the thing that’s keeping Killian alive.  This results in Emma not wanting to get rid of the darkness in order to save Killian, however, her family believes that defeating the darkness is worth Killian’s life (Killian would probably also agree, the selfless bastard) so they go ahead and try and do it anyway and this is a big reason as to why Emma embraces the darkness.  She has to stop them so she casts the curse and wipes their memories, taking them all back to Storybrooke.  So now, in Storybrooke, Killian is going to find out the truth and that is going to awaken the dark magic within him, causing him to go dark as well (which is why we see him in new, black clothes and fighting with Excalibur).  The midseason finale (which will have flashbacks centered around Killian and his father, so we already know it’s going to be focused on his character) will then be Killian going rogue, and he has Excalibur so no one can control him.  Emma goes to her family and enlists their help in finding him and putting an end to the darkness once and for all, even though it means that Killian will die.  So, they do just that, defeat the darkness, Killian dies and goes to the Underworld and Emma goes to get him back!!  

Any thoughts?