not wanting to put a burden on him

Rafael Barba / Green Green Dress

Prompt:  “Green Green Dress” from Tick Tick … Boom

“Deep dark velvet/Hugs your silhouette
Black silk stockings/You’re my Juliet
The green green dress/Twenty buttons and a strap
The green green dress/What a pleasure to unwrap” 

I’m a little too addicted to “Green Green Dress.” Is it that obvious? Please enjoy this fluffy little mess. I got to use my Shakespeare knowledge for this fic, which makes me so happy as an English major (Hamlet’s my fav though). 

Tags: @mrsrafaelbarba

Originally posted by mickkarn

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“He was lost, Cas. Our last hunt, he almost didn’t make it back and said he saw Billie.”

“He saw Billie?” Castiel parroted. They were both still in the war room in the bunker, the aftermath of recent events still fresh and new in their minds as Sam recounted what happened while Castiel had been “away.” 

“Yeah, and it wasn’t great.” Sam bit his lip. “Cas, When Mom disappeared…when you died. I think it broke him to a point where he couldn’t come back from it and deal with his grief. More than one night he’s had nightmares where I’d have to get him out and it’s always your name that’d he’d scream.”

“Grief is a complex emotion that is difficult to understand. The both of you have suffered with it greatly, but I have passed before.” Castiel paused, cognizant the statement should make no sense to anyone else except for the three of them. “He had been in grief then but had managed to find a way out. What made this time different?”

“I saw your wings, Cas.” A voice interrupted them from the threshold of the war room.

It clicked in Castiel’s head then. Understandable. "Dean.”

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Join me in AU Territory for a few minutes, okay?

a.  So Obi Wan Kenobi basically ends up going, “NOPE. FUCK THIS NOISE.” and decides to raise baby Luke Skywalker himself.

(He’s not a true Jedi anymore; not when he can see all the mistakes he’s made with Anakin in full, excruciating detail.  Not when those closely held values of detachment and denial of emotions have led to fire and death and grief and…

No.  He will not turn.  He might not be a perfect Jedi, but he won’t turn to the Dark Side.)

b.  So he loves Luke with all his heart and baby Luke is basically the teeniest, most adorable ball of sunshine and light and his smiles are a balm on Obi Wan’s broken heart.

c.  Also.  Obi-Wan joins the Rebellion. Because hope doesn’t just lie in Jedi and the Light Side of the Force.   Hope lies in the people who are willing to live and die for their freedom, who are there to resist the Empire and its lies.

d.  Eventually, Obi-Wan finds Rex and Ahsoka and of course, that means baby Luke has more family members who will love him.  Maybe he’s not growing up as royalty the way Leia is, but he is equally treasured and precious to Uncle Rex and Aunt ‘Soka.

(Except Luke calls her Snips - just out of the blue - even though Obi Wan has never told him about this nickname and he doesn’t understand why Aunt ‘Soka suddenly catches him up in her arms and holds him tight tight tight.  He thinks he’s made her sad but Aunt ‘Soka tells him she can be his Aunt Snips and thus, Aunt Snips she became.)

e.  Obi Wan does not want to put the burden of stopping Vader on Luke’s shoulders.  It is monstrously unfair and neither Luke nor Leia should be burdened with the task of repairing their father’s mistakes.  This was Obi-Wan’s failure and it is his job to make it right.

f.  Vader chases after Obi-Wan’s ghost in various Rebel skirmishes - Jedi who mysteriously disappear and escape his finest soldiers,. Imperial shipyards being sabotaged, the best scientists of the Empire making successful defections.  He is always just one step behind, just one moment too late.  Vader’s rage knows no bounds.

(Vader never sees or hears about the child in Obi-Wan’s care.  His heart has already been buried in the royal tombs of Naboo, where Padme Amidala lies in her forever sleep.)

g.  There is a holo of little Luke and little Jyn Erso playing together.  Jyn has not smiled in months as her father and mother have desperately tried to flee the Empire, so that they would not be forced to keep working on its latest monstrosity.  It is Luke who has made her laugh again for the first time as they ran and chased each other.

h.  Luke’s first friend, first crush and his idol is the dashing Cassian Andor.

i.  Obi Wan finds healing and a new outlook/philosophy on the Force when he becomes friends with Chirrut Imwe and Baze Malbus.  He and Luke make the pilgrimage to the Holy City of Jeddah and while Luke is too young to understand, the ruins of its ancient temple make the child “feel good.”  For Obi-Wan, it is a peace he’s not felt in years. 

j.  Some things are still meant to happen.  Obi-Wan and Vader clash over the years but each duel is inconclusive and both men walk away alive.  It takes years for the Rebel Alliance to gain steam.  Galen Erso still falls into the hands of the Empire.  The pilot Bodhi Rook still defects to the Rebels.  Jyn Erso and Cassian Andor still lead a desperate group to Shariff to retrieve the Death Star plans.

k.  The difference is that Luke Skywalker defies his somewhat overprotective Uncle Ben, having stolen a ship to Shariff to rescue all of his friends.  They barely make it off planet as the Death Star blows up its Imperial base, but Luke’s gotten to be a very good pilot and will spend his downtime happily chatting away with Bodhi Rook.    

l.  Baze spends a few minutes yelling at Chirrut for having the “suicidal tendencies of an Alderaanian lemmingray” before kissing him stupid and it is the first good laugh that Rogue One has, even as they are all safe and sound and alive.

m.  Luke grins even though he knows he’s in deep trouble with Uncle Ben.  There is a transmission from him - Darth Vader is now in hot pursuit of those lost plans and he is chasing after the Tantive IV.  They will all rendezvous with Princess Leia on Tatooine. 

It begins.  A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…  

Reasons I disliked Hannah Baker

1. Obvious one, but leaving tapes back after your death is extremely fucked up and damaging to the people left behind. Maybe the top 5 characters did deserve to have tape made on them, but the rest… nope. It’s a sadistic move and something that fucks up characters like Alex and Zack , for life.

2. She didn’t leave a single letter for her parents. She spend hours recording tapes on people who ruined her life, but not a single page or not even a ’ I love you’ to her parents - who loved her extremely and didn’t deserve to suffer like they did.

3. She put such a burden on Tony. It’s unexplainable. He felt so troubled and conflicted on whether he was doing the right thing by hiding the tapes from Hannah’s parents. He didn’t deserve that one bit.

4. On the day of Jessica’s party, she pushed Clay away, because she didn’t deserve him and being with her would ruin him. Okay. But didn’t she think, that listen to theses tapes would ruin him either way? I mean she wanted to protect his innocence so much, she shouldn’t have added him on the list.

Yeah, he could have said something that night and calmed her down, but we all need to understand - clay was nervous he had done something wrong, staying back would have messed it up more. If this was another show, where the guy persisted on staying in the room when the girls repeatedly asked him to leave- we would hate that guy.

She couldn’t possibly mess him up like that. He is going to blame himself for the rest of his life, he didn’t deserve that.

I guess, that’s pretty much it. And FYI, I don’t mean that she deserved to die or anything fucked up like that. She didn’t deserve the pain she suffered or anything after that.

Additional note : to people who didn’t agree with me so they simply said ‘You clearly never have been mentally unstable’, I would like to answer you with a quote, ironically, by Jay Asher - “You don’t know what goes on in anyone’s life but your own.” If you don’t agree with me, I completely respect that, in fact you can explain me why I misunderstood her … but don’t talk about shit you have no clue about :)
4

can we talk about scott mccall for a second, because this is a boy who wanted nothing to do with the supernatural, he didn’t ask to be bitten, he wasn’t power hungry, he didnt want to be anything more, he just wanted to play lacrosse and get his grades up and make his mother proud. and yet, he’s been saddled with the burden of being beacon hills’ protector and as reluctant as he first was, he’s done everything in his power to make sure his town is safe. he’s continuously put other people’s safety and happiness before his own. he’s been willing to sacrifice everything he cares about for beacon hills and his friends, he was willing to quit lacrosse to make sure everyone was safe, he was willing to join an enemy that wanted to kill him to save his friend’s parents, he put his future on the hold for the people of beacon hills, he died for them. and it’s gotten to the point where he just clearly doesn’t think anyone cares about him beyond the role of true alpha, like sure he knows his friends love him, but he’s so used to giving, to being the protector of beacon hills, that he literally cannot believe that someone might care about him because they care about scott, not the true alpha, not the werewolf, but scott mccall, the boy. and it’s just incredibly sad.

Remorse.

or… harry regrets breaking y/n’s heart

category: angst

I miss you.

His mouth is dry as he stares down at his phone, thumb hovering over the arrow that’ll send the text he’s longing to mail. With another deep breath, he studies the message over again, then begins to question himself. Should I write more? She deserves an apology. Maybe the word crave instead of miss. Yearn for? He deletes the text but retypes it in the same moment.

He’s never felt guilt this deeply before, he’s never so desperately wanted to turn back time and change everything– rephrase all of his words differently. Do things differently. The thought of him not being able to go back and change things hits him like a ton of bricks, sending his short nails into the palm of his hand.

A clap on his shoulder wakes him from his thoughts, and he looks up with attentive eyes. “Ready to go?” Jeff laughs, tucking his heel into the back of his shoe. “Reservations don’t hold themselves.”

“No, yeah.” he rushes, tucking the locked phone into the back pocket of his jeans. “Let’s go.”

“It’s my fucking job, y’know that, we’ve been through this a million times before. Get over it, angel.”

She scoffs in disbelief, untying the silk scarf from around her neck. “Get over it? Get over it. Over my boyfriend of nearly a year not telling anyone about our relationship—?“

“The media would go insane I- fuck I told y’this—”

“I’m not asking you to tell the world, Harry! Maybe your mom, your sister? My family? I’ve been lying to them for way too long, keeping an enormous part of my life away from them how’s that supposed to make me feel? Do you know how distressing it is to be introduced as a friend to you? To not tell anyone, not even my best friend how much you mean to me?”

“Y’do know it’s like that for me as well? A relationship is consists of two people—”

“Not that I’d know.”

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Secrets

Requested. (This was a little bit difficult for me….hope it’s up to par D:)

Song or Quote : Love is unselfishly choosing for another’s highest good.
Who: Peter Parker

Peter sulked behind Tony who led them to an old diner that miraculously was still standing after everything the city had been through. He was dreading what was going to be said to him once they finally sat down. Peter had messed up, bad. Tony ordered a black coffee and a cherry turnover while Peter just stuck to a chocolate milk. He didn’t even want anything but Tony insisted he get something. The silence was painful and seemed like it was never going to end. 

After some time of watching Tony eat his turnover, Peter finally decided to break the painful quiet. “Look, Mr. Stark, I just, I need, I want to apologize for not being on my A game tonight.” 

Tony chewed for a minute, staring at the teenager before swallowing and deciding to respond back. “Mind telling me why I almost got my head ripped off and your body almost getting torn in half? This isn’t some game, kid. It’s real life and real life means real danger and real danger means broken bones and dead bodies. When I bring you along to these kinds of things, I bring you because I need you. Just because I’m Iron-man doesn’t mean I can do everything which is something you will never hear me say again.” 

Peter bit his lip, shaking his head. Trying to find the words to justify why his mind was not where it was supposed to be. Stuttering and tripping over his words, he bowed his head and mumbled, “I’m sorry, Mr. Stark. I, it’s, I, my-”

“-just stop.” Tony sighed, running a hand over his face, he inhaled deeply. This was a kid sitting in front of him, just a kid. A kid that was fortunate to have these abilities and unfortunate at the same time because he was stuck with them. Looking at Peter, he asked calmly, “Where was your mind at, kid? Why weren’t you focused?”

Peter refused to meet Tony’s gaze, he didn’t want to admit why he had been spacing out. Because, he knew that lives were at stake but the guilt of cancelling his date with [Y/N] for the fourth time in a row was eating away at him. He desperately tried to keep his crime fighting life as Spider-Man and [Y/N] separate. He didn’t want to put that burden on her, constantly being worried whether or not he was going to make it home or not. It wasn’t fair to cause stress when he could just avoid it and keep his Spider-Man life private. 

Sipping on his coffee, Tony sternly spoke. “If we’re going to be working together, we’ve got to be honest with one another.”

Again Peter didn’t respond, he just didn’t know how. 

“What was so damn important in that brain of yours that made you forget about your life for one split second?”

Peter toyed with his hands, shrugging his shoulders, getting frustrated with himself. “I don’t know, Mr. Stark. I just, I spaced. I know this is important and that I should always stay focused but, I just, I-”

“-Peter, listen to me, and you listen good. I see potential in you, please for the love of god don’t make me regret my decision.”

Peter frowned, looking down in his lap, he toyed with his fingers again. “I’m seeing this girl, [Y/N], Mr. Stark. I have been for awhile now and I kept it a secret because I don’t know, I want to keep my personal life for just me. And I don’t want to drag her into this life because well, she doesn’t need to be apart of it.” Looking up at Tony, Peter sighed. “I’m still a kid and I want to do kid things like go to school, see her in the hall and think to myself, ‘wow, she’s so beautiful,’ and then meet up with her at the lockers and talk about how her day has been going. Go on dates, have awkward moments on those said dates, struggle to find the words to say when I find out that I love her.” Peter ran both hands through his hair, “Tonight was the fourth night in a row that I’ve cancelled on her and I’m just afraid that she’ll leave me and I don’t want that because when I’m with her, I feel good. I feel great, actually. I feel normal, I feel like just a normal kid and it’s an escape from this double life I’m living-which don’t get me wrong, Mr. Stark, this life is nice too because I feel like I’m making a difference in this world but sometimes I just need a getaway and [Y/N] is my getaway. Wait…what are you doing?” 

Tony mumbled under his breath, “I may have bit off more than I can chew.” His focus was completely focused on his watch, his fingers were hovering over a holographic keyboard as he toyed with it. In seconds [Y/N] social media profile was hovering in the air, “Is this? This is the girl you’re seeing?” Tony seemed impressed, “She’s cute.” He looked up in time to find Peter’s horrified stare, ignoring it, he skimmed through her pictures and interests. “Very cute, aw, well isn’t this sweet. Is that the Statue of Liberty? It is, isn’t it. Hm, let’s see ‘Peter took me to see Lady Liberty today!’ Oh come on, man. You took her to see the Statue of Liberty for a date?” 

Still stunned that Tony had [Y/N]’s social in his hands, he swallowed. “Uh, yeah, she, uh, she’s always wanted to go and I thought, you know, I should, wait why are we talking about this right now?” He wanted to get off the topic of [Y/N]. There was a reason why he kept her from Tony despite knowing that he could easily get onto it. 

Waving his hand over the floating images, they vanished. Toying with the keyboard some more, another image popped up over his wrist. Swiping the images, he nodded in approval. “She’s a smart girl. All A’s and lookie here, she’s in three AP classes. How old are you again? How does she have the time for this and you? These are some impressive scores, probably the highest in your grade I take it. Let’s just see, oh look, she does with you being right behind her.” Waving his hand again to make them disappear, Tony leaned forward. “Okay, look, I get why you’re head over heels, puppy dog in love with her. She’s a cute, smart, very smart girl.” 

“Did you? Did you just hack into my school’s grading system to look at her grades?”

Waggling his finger, Tony narrowed his eyes. “Ah, no changing the subject and really? You have to ask? I’m Tony Stark, I could get into this rinky dink diner’s security system and shut it down.” Clearing his throat, “Listen to me, kid. Love is unselfishly choosing for another’s highest good. You put your life at risk tonight because you were too busy worrying about her. But you know what, I get that, I get you want to protect her from this double life thing your living. I get it. But what you don’t understand is that keeping her from this, is only making it worse for you and her.” 

"I can’t just tell her I’m Spider-Man! She’ll freak out and if she freaks out, I’ll freak out. Her and Aunt May are very similar in their freaking out episodes. I have to keep it a secret.”

“You know, I’ve heard girls date men that resemble and remind them of their fathers but I’ve never heard boys dating girls that remind them of their really attractive aunts.” 

Peter narrowed his eyes, “I never said [Y/N] reminds me of Aunt May, I just said they freak out the same. But yes to some degree, I guess you could say they have similar qualities-but that’s besides the point! I am not telling her I’m Spider-Man.” 

Tony rolled his eyes, sighing dramatically. “When you have someone that means this much to you, you want to protect them and only them. I’ve been there, kid. You want to make the world a better place for them but the thing is, is when you step foot into that suit. It’s not just about them, it’s about everyone. You have a responsibility to save as many people as you can. And when you’re all in love and what not, you lose sight of that responsibility. Prime example was tonight when we almost died.” 

“So I just what? Break up with her and suffer? Because I don’t think I can do that, Mr. Stark. If anything, it’ll make my concentration worse.”

“I’m not saying that. What I am saying is you have a responsibility to save as many lives as you can without losing your own. You’re young, you’ll find other [Y/N]’s, if not better ones.”

Peter squinted his eyes, shaking his head. “No, I won’t. There’s no one like [Y/N]. No one.” 

Tony half nodded, understanding the firm point the teenager had. Sighing, he rubbed his forehead, “This job isn’t easy and you’ve got a long way to go before these instincts start to feel like second nature.” Glancing out the window, his eyes caught sight of a familiar face among a crowd of kids about to step foot into the diner. “Word of advice, Parker? You should tell her what you’ve been up to. Because one thing I will say is that despite my distaste for love, that kind of girl is not the kind of girl you let slip away from your fingers over something so irritatingly silly as not telling her who you are and what you do.” Throwing down some money, he stood up and winked at Peter before saying, “Because a few years from now, I may scout her to work for me and that’d be so unbelievably awkward to work with her after you were an idiot in not telling her.” 

“Wait, where are you going?”

“Out the door to my lavish expensive penthouse where I can take a wonderful lavender bath.”

“Peter?”

Peter spun around, frozen in place to find [Y/N] standing behind him. Struggling to stand up, his knees banged the underside of the table before scrambling out of the booth. [Y/N]?! What, what are you doing here?” 

Raising a brow, she eyed Tony suspiciously, “I could ask you the same thing…”

Tony smiled, “You must be [Y/N], Peter has told me so much about you. Sorry about having him cancel on your date but I really needed to finish up some finishing details on his entry for the September Foundation.”

“At a run down diner?” She asked, not really believing in his lie.

“You know what, you, my sweet girl, are a lot smarter than I had been told.” Moving around her, he headed for the door. “Peter will telling you everything you need to know.” Winking before leaving the door, he chuckled to himself as he left Peter looking frantic and nervous. 

[Y/N] crossed her arms, “Peter, what is going on? I thought you said Aunt May wouldn’t let you go out tonight. And why the hell was Tony Stark in this diner with you? And, the September Foundation? What is he talking about?”

Sighing, he reached for her hand, “We need to have a long talk about all of those questions but not here.” 

3

Plucky Pennywhistle’s MagicaI Menagerie, 7.14

It seems like a silly thing, but here’s an example of the guilt Dean carries because of the burden placed on him as a child. He is sincerely apologizing for leaving his little brother at Plucky Pennywhistle’s, and giving him a fear of clowns, when Dean was a teenager. He’s taking the blame for Sam’s fear of clowns and apologizing for it. Dean is apologizing for being a bad parent to his little brother; the one he shouldn’t have had to be a parent to, at all. 

The narrative wants the viewer to agree that Dean was a bad parent too–that he’s right to apologize. Because Dean is being put in the same category, narratively-speaking, as the rest of the parents in this episode–the ones called out as “lazy parents” because they used Plucky’s as a place to dump their kids, rather than paying attention to them. So, basically the show is acknowledging that Dean parented Sam, but it doesn’t acknowledge all that means for Dean. It’s still the proverbial elephant in the room. 

And now that the cat’s finally out of the bag after 12.22, with Dean explicitly stating he had to be mother and father both to Sam (finally show, what the fuck took you so long?), next on the agenda should be to have Sam and Dean talk about it, because I’m not sure Sam fully acknowledges the messed up family dynamic either. 

Batboys suffer from Hanahaki Disease

Request: Can I request the Batboys with Hanahaki disease? Thank u!

-

Hanahaki disease is an illness borne of one-sided love, causing flowers form and grow in the lungs of the unrequited, the petals coughed up with increasing frequency. If the love is not returned, the flowers filling the patients chest will eventually prove fatal.


Dick Grayson

  • He had heard of the disease but never thought he would develop it
  • When he first coughed up a few petals you bet he locked himself in his bedroom and cried the entire day
  • No one could get him to open up 
  • Besides you
  • You tried and he wanted to never let you see him in this way but he needed your comfort
  • You sat beside him and cried, you didn’t want your best friend to die
  • He tried to hide it as much as he could
  • But when he started excessively coughing while at dinner everyone started getting really worried
  • “You’re coughing up petals? Dick why would you hide this?” 
  • “Because they don’t love me back!”
  • He would be so upset and would try his best to ignore it but he couldn’t
  • Everyone else would be upset too because Dick isn’t Dick 
  • Slowly the tightness of his chest disapears and instantly he is super worried so he rushes to your house
  • He thinks something has happened to you but when he’s greeted with your warm smile and his heart somersaults in his chest 
  • He realizes you must love him back if the coughing has stopped
  • Getting really hopeful 
  • Kissing you with every ounce of love and adoration he’s held for you for the longest time
  • He’s never been as happy as he is right now

Jason Todd

  • He didn’t give it any thought whatsoever
  • Trust me when i say he would try to ignore it the best he could 
  • But when he would hunch over and start spilling out petals, everyone told him he needed to rest
  • Cue him arguing with everyone
  • “No I’m not in love! Stop saying I am!” 
  • Soon after when he’s lovingly gazing at you while you eat he realizes how much he loves you
  • The insecure thoughts take over immediately
  • “Who would love someone like me?”
  • “I’ll never be good enough for them.” 
  • “They deserve someone better.” 
  • He would try to distance himself from you 
  • Since your his best friend you notice straight away
  • He tells you that he’s been coughing up petals
  • You cling to his side and cry 
  • He thinks to himself how you were, in a way, killing him but he would never let that burden be on you 
  • Not when he adores you way to much to put you in that sort of pain
  • Like Damian when the pain goes away he thinks the worst is coming
  • He would spend what he thinks are his last days with you
  • He would go all mushy and low-key admit his love for you
  • When you think he’s sleeping you admit how much you love him and how stupid you feel for not realizing it sooner
  • A goofy grin takes over his face and soon your both kissing and cuddling and so happy and never want to leave each other’s side

Tim Drake

  • This boy is all torn up
  • Gets really upset and is like “what’s the point in living”
  • Will work through all the coughing fits he has 
  • I feel like he would experience the effects the worst out of all the boys i don’t know why i just do
  • Everyone doesn’t realize until much later since he’s always doing something or up in his room
  • His bin that’s beside his desk is filled to the brim with petals 
  • His room would also be in a similar state
  • He knows of his feelings for you but would do nothing to let you know about them
  • You go about your day without knowing he was going to die eventually
  • Well that was until you rush into to his room 
  • You are freaking out
  • He tries to get you to calm down but he starts having a coughing fit
  • Petals are everywhere
  • He is super weak and you notice how sick he looks
  • You push him to his bed and cuddle with him 
  • He loves how close he is to you and the light feeling in his chest makes it easy to snuggle into your side and fall asleep
  • You realize how much he means to you 
  • You don’t sleep at all just watching over him
  • In the morning he looks so much better
  • This relieves you so when he opens his eyes he graced with you smiling down on him 
  • He wishes to wake up like this every morning
  • You press lil kisses ove his face and tell him you love him
  • He is so happy tears well up in his eyes
  • His wish was granted

Damian Wayne

  • He is confused af
  • Why is he coughing up petals?
  • This only happens when your love is unrequited 
  • I’m not in love
  • It hits him like a train
  • ohhh so that’s why my heart starts beating super fast around you and I can’t breath and I’m sweating
  • Suddenly he’s overcomed with sadness
  • The person he loves doesn’t love him back and he doesn’t know what to do with himself
  • How does he move on? He can’t, he will eventually die
  • He would spend his days with Titus and will lose all his will to be himself
  • Dick would be incredibility sad since his little brother won’t get to experience love and this makes him tear him
  • He has really bad days when his chest is so tight he finds it hard to breathe 
  • Those are the days he spends just thinking about you and how much he loves you 
  • He would never admit it but he’s a lil sweetheart, he thinks of your eyes and how they shine whenever you talk, and your beautiful smile that he adores
  • The tightness in his chest kind of gets better and he thinks that he’s probably going to die soon
  • Doesn’t notice the looks you give him 
  • When you finally admit the love you hold for him he is shocked
  • “I thought I was going to die?” 
  • “Well lucky you didn’t since now I can do this” 
  • Cue a small peck and his cheeks flushing 
My Fake Boyfriend - part one

Originally posted by thedailystyles

Pairing: Harry Styles x reader

Summary: You refuse to go on a date with Harry, but when you tell your ex that you will be attending his engagement party with your new boyfriend by your side, you may just need him.

A/N: send me a message or an ask if you would like a part two to this! If no one wants it then I won’t be prioritising it in my ‘to write’ list.


He was late, you thought as you glanced at the analogue face of your watch.

You immediately cursed yourself for thinking such a thing. For him to be late, there had to be a prearranged meeting where a time was set for him to arrive. Just because he came into your store at 11 o’clock sharp every Saturday morning for the past month didn’t mean he was obligated to come today. Besides, you shouldn’t care. No. You didn’t care.

It was a quiet time of day in the cupcake patisserie. It gave you plenty of time to prepare all of the cupcake orders you had later in the day. You were just pulling a tray of red velvet cupcakes out of the oven for an order to be ready at midday when you heard the familiar twinkle of the door chime. It took all the self-control you had not to whip around and check to see if it was who you thought it was. If it was him, you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction.

You took your time sliding the tray onto the cooling rack and taking off your oven mitts before turning to greet your customer. You fought the smile that threatened to creep its way onto your face and chiselled your face into a mask of nonchalance as you took him in.

Harry leant his forearms on the counter, a smirk on his face and amusement in his eyes. While dressed in one of his much more casual outfits, you were sure that the brown knit sweater he adorned was worth more than all your clothes combined. A moment of silence passed between the two of you before Harry spoke. “Mornin’ love. Sorry I’m late, I got caught up in a meeting.”

“Late?” you asked, as though you hadn’t thought that. “Who are you again?” you asked, as though everyone in the Western world didn’t know who he was. You knew this boy’s status and you refused to allow him to believe you cared in the slightest. Which you didn’t. Your growing attraction to him had nothing to do with that.

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Keith and Shiro Discover the Secrets of the Universe

(alternatively, how sheith could happen, especially despite the ‘brother’ line)

so after finishing aristotle & dante discover the secrets of the universe, i found myself thinking hardcore about sheith (of course) and basically, i feel like the way ari processes his feelings throughout the book is a feasible way keith might fall in love with shiro. and thus, i decided to make a little post about all the soft and tender feelings of how i could see sheith falling in love. ❤️

(very very minor spoilers of a&ddtsotu ahead. mostly just a mention / the vibes from the book are sprinkled throughout)

imagine this:

  • keith does see shiro as a brother for most of the time he’s known him because shiro’s the closest thing to a family he’s ever known. so from the beginning, when they get closer, keith’s just like “perhaps this is what family feels like :)” – at first.
  • because keith has his family background mystery hanging over him and possible abandonment from his father (kind of like ari’s brother situation from the book), those things occupy a lot of space in his life and take precedence, and since they’ve occupied that space for so long, he doesn’t intentionally make a lot of room for processing other big things/feelings. wondering about his family is a cloud that’s constantly over him.
  • at some point he meets shiro, and of course, as they build trust/closeness, he’s attached to him. they’re attached to each other.
  • meanwhile, shiro starts falling for him, especially because he admires so much in keith.
  • i can just imagine shiro telling keith a similar line from the book “you’re not afraid of anything” and that being one of the reasons he likes this boy so much
  • but he doesn’t tell keith how he really feels at all because he knows that (1) keith is way more preoccupied with his family origins, so he doesn’t want to put that burden on him, and (2) keith sees shiro as the only family he knows, and he wouldn’t want to ruin that for keith or make it weird because he would have no one else to fall back on. he’d rather just be a supportive friend first and foremost.
  • so he falls for keith quietly and sweeps it under the rug like he always does with any emotions that may be harmful to someone else
  • even before he leaves for kerberos, he wants to tell him so badly, but just doesn’t. they hug instead and he hopes to see him soon.
  • then, when he’s back from kerberos, a little later than planned and a little worse for wear, shiro has seen SHIT™. so now shiro also has way too much on his plate that needs to take precedence over any personal feelings/desires.
  • they go through the rest of s1 and beginning of s2 this way.
  • then comes that moment when keith says “you’re like a brother to me.” it makes sense, it’s not even new. shiro is pained but he understands. he’s known this forever now. he gets the BOM off his back and runs to him anyways when red starts attacking.
  • but, now that keith has shed some light on his family history, there’s less stuff in the way of his feelings, except maybe his own uncertainty / possible denial
  • so when shiro disappears this time, he has a bit more space in his heart to give these uncertain feelings the proper thought and examination
  • also, maybe he even has a convo with hunk, who’s just like “dude. have you seen the way you look at him? i’m surprised you didn’t know? i thought it was obvious” or something
  • in shiro’s absence, keith figures it out. he’s got the basics of his family history out of the way, he’s made some friends other than shiro who have become family to him, the definition of family has already changed and is continuing to change for him
  • with all this reexamination, it makes sense now. he’s loved shiro this whole time but because of a mix of not understanding it fully and being afraid of the idea of ACTUALLY being in love with shiro, hadn’t come to fully accept it until now.
  • THEN, when they reunite, he finally tells shiro, “you used to say i’m not afraid of anything. but i am afraid of something. you.” because he had no idea how to handle the idea that he might’ve been in love with shiro this entire time
  • shiro just chuckles and says, “about time,” and cupping his hand around the back of keith’s head, pulls him in for a kiss

also i’m going to fic this if it’s the last thing i do

lydialovebad  asked:

Do you know what I would really like? An AU where everything is the same but Marinette is a boy (Marin?) and there is a really fluffy marichat scene ♥^♥ I would die for see something like that!!! What do you think?

*grabs tablet and imediately draws about it proving how much trash i am*

so like i thought some ideas for this, if that’s alright, and well:

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Please Don’t Tell | JJ

Request: @taekookmin-kookie

Can I request a jungkook playboy smut? 

Pairing: Playboy!Jungkook X Reader

Summary: Jungkook was well known for being a playboy. Sleeping with girls and then shoving them away, his next target was y/n. Y/n was just innocent and not to mention also Taehyung’s little sister. “International Playboy!”

Genre: Smut, fluff, maybe a bit of angst

Warnings: This is a smut; you all know shit bout to get real.

Word count: 1,800+ 


 “Can you learn to keep it down for once? I could hear you going all last night.” Hoseok said as Jungkook walked into the kitchen with only his grey sweats on. “You’re just jealous because I’ve had sex before you hyung.” Jungkook defended, grabbing a bottle of water out of the fridge and drinking it. They suddenly heard the front door close and heard Taehyung’s voice boom throughout the dorm. “V is in the house!” He yelled causing his younger sister he brought with him like usual to giggle. Y/n was shy around the boys, especially Hoseok because she had a major crush on him. Taehyung knew about her crush on him, but specifically told them all to stay away from her. Especially Jungkook. Of course, that never stopped them from all flirting with her when Tae wasn’t around. “Hi y/n.” Hoseok greeted with a big grin on his face once he saw her, Jungkook watched as she tucked a stray behind her ear and blushed. “Hi H-Hoseok.” She stuttered looking at the floor, feeling her cheeks heat up. Jungkook could tell you were very shy around Hoseok, thus meaning you liked him. And part of him deep down hated that you liked him. Why was it always Hoseok? Jungkook was the youngest but he’s more experienced if you know what I mean. A cute ringtone began playing and Tae pulling his phone out of his pocket, glancing at it as the screen lit up with Jimin’s name, excusing himself he stepped away leaving the three in silence. “So how have you been?” Hoseok asked leaning forward and resting his crossed arms on the table as he looked her up and down. Jungkook just stood on the side, watching as y/n would twirl her hair and smile at him. “Good. How about you? How’s your latest dance been going?” She asked trying to hide the fact she was blushing, and Jungkook tried hiding the fact he was annoyed that she completely ignored him. “It’s been good. Still trying to nail down some important parts though.” Hoseok answered before Tae stepped back into the room. “Hoseok, Jimin wanted us at the studio to practice our parts of the upcoming dance.” Taehyung states and Hoseok was putting on his shoes and cap. “Jungkook can you watch y/n for a bit? I trust you not to do anything, I won’t be gone long. Three hours’ tops.” Tae said as Jungkook nodded and acted like she was a burden. She used to have the biggest crush on Jungkook, that was until she found out that he had become a big douche. Taehyung left with Hoseok quickly leaving the two still in the kitchen, surrounded by silence. She decided to be the first to break it, looking up and finally meeting his gaze for once. “Do you want to watch a movie?” She asked, playing with her sleeves and tugging them down a little. “Whatever.” Jungkook just grumbled, walking past her and towards the couch. Jungkook just grumbled, walking past her and towards the couch. She didn’t understand why he was always like this, but then again he was a fuckboy. She walked over and crouched down, looking at the movies on the shelf that they could watch. Jungkook sat there, tongue in cheek and his mouth hung slightly open as he cocked his head to the side. He wondered what she would be like in bed, they always say the quiet ones are usually the loudest. He smirked thinking about the h/c haired girl, begging beneath him for more and he would thrust into her at a rapid pace. The little thought ran through his veins causing his pants to tighten around his growing bulge. Not only was it that though, the fact that she was Taehyung’s sister and how hot it would be if Taehyung came home to Jungkook balls deep in his little sister. Y/n put in a movie and stepped back, sitting away from Jungkook on the couch with her legs tucked up a little. The movie began playing but Jungkook kept his gaze on her, watching as her lips would tug into a small smile at something funny. How she would constantly lick her plump lips that he wanted to bite down into while snaking his tongue into her mouth. Of course, y/n could feel his gaze on her but pretended she was caught up in the movie. She shifted slightly in her spot, not sure of how to react. She felt goosebumps rise to her skin, not only because of him but because of how cold the room was. The air con had been on all day, making the entire room freezing. She began to shiver, her bottom lip shaking as she rubbed her arms and legs for warmth. “Cold?” Jungkook asked and she finally met his gaze. “A little.” She said laughing nervously. He suddenly stood slipped off the black hoodie he had been wear, exposing his toned chest. Dirty things rushing to y/n’s mind that she never thought of before. She would love to run her hands down his chest and straddle his waist, but she didn’t want to ruin anything she had with him. He was a playboy, simply using girls to get pleasure. She realised she was staring a little too long and finally accepted the jumper, slipping it on herself and immediately melting from how warm it was around her. But her legs were still a bit cold, Jungkook smirked at the still shivering girl and stood up to grab the blanket from the cupboard and sitting back down next to her. Placing it over the both of them, she didn’t understand why he was sitting so close but didn’t question it. 


They just sat there and watched the movie, once it finished they just put on the next one.  Jungkook and y/n had been watching movies for over three hours now and wondered where Taehyung was. “Can I ask you something?” Jungkook suddenly spoke and looked down to meet her gaze. “S-sure.” She tried not to stutter to show how nervous she was but failed miserably. “Have you ever done anything with a guy?” She asked raising and eyebrow and cocking his head to the side, smirking at her a little. “What do you mean?” She knew exactly what he meant, and had an idea of what Jungkook wanted to do. “Like…” He stopped to lick his lips and think of what to say next. “Have you ever given a guy a blow job? Or kissed a guy even?” Jungkook said smirking, she didn’t want to answer. The question alone made her cheeks go bright red, the look she had on her face in pure shock. “I-I…” She stuttered, trying to gather herself but it was so hard with the look he was giving her and his hand was now placed on her thigh, gently rubbing circles on it with his thumb. “No.” She finally managed to get out and his smirk only grew. She didn’t expect such a question to come from him, she also didn’t expect him to suddenly lean forward and press his soft plump lips to hers. Shocked at first but soon giving in to the kiss, she let him slide his tongue past her lips and into her mouth, battling with hers for dominance. His hand gripped her inner thigh firmly before slipping past her shorts and panties to rub at the aching clit. A small gasp left her lips as he tried not to moan, suddenly the door opening and Jungkook pulled back as he heard the voices that belonged to Taehyung and Hoseok. Both a sweaty mess, Jungkook’s movements had stopped and thank god the blanket was still covering them both. “Hey, sorry we took longer than we thought.” Taehyung said as he spotted the two sitting on the couch, eyes glued to the screen. “Jungkook what happened to your shirt?” Hoseok asked before taking a sip out of his water bottle. “I was getting really hot, y/n didn’t care that I wasn’t wearing a shirt so yeah.” He said and they both nodded before sitting down next to the two on the couch and watching the movie as well. Y/n was begging for a release, his fingers moving the slightest. Suddenly she almost yelped when she felt him start moving his fingers against her again. Finally going down her slit and slipping two fingers in, uncomfortable at first but then she got used to the feel and found herself choking back moans. “Shh…be quiet and I’ll let you cum.” He whispered, nibbling on her lobe a little as she tried her best. His fingers slipped in and out of her core easily, thanks to the pool that was happening down there during their make out session. She could feel the knot building in her stomach, her hips bucking ever so slightly and her legs opening wider so he can get her to her high. It was going so slow and she needed to release now, his fingers managed to speed up but coming to a halt when Taehyung began speaking. Y/n letting a faint whine come from her lips that only Jungkook managed to hear. “I’ll be back, I need to use the bathroom.” Tae said standing up and walked out of the room, leaving the three there. Hoseok sat there still watching the movie and unaware of the things happening under the blanket. Jungkook picked up right where he left off, this time moving a little more faster to make her reach her high. Her hand placed on his thigh and squeezing it hard when she came undone on his fingers. Pulling out quickly and putting them up to his mouth to suck off her juices as he remained eye contact with her. “Next time, please tell me when you’re going to finger y/n so I can leave the room.” Hoseok said standing up and smirking. They both snapped their heads in his direction, shocked expressions across their faces. “Please don’t tell.” Jungkook pleaded and Hoseok nodded. “I won’t tell if you warn me next time.” He said before walking out of the room and leaving the two. “How was that?” He asked letting out a sigh of relief. “It was good.” Y/n sighed, knowing that after this Jungkook would still never look at her as anything more than someone to sleep with. She hung her head low but Jungkook was quick to lift it up to make her look at him. “I know I have had a history with girls, but I would really like to settle with you.” He said giving her a smile. Not a smirk, or cheeky grin but a genuine smile. “I’d like that too.” She said smiling and leaning forward to kiss his lips. “But please don’t tell.” She said pulling back quickly to say and Jungkook smiled and nodded.  

Just To See You

This was written because @laquilasse​ chanted, “blind fic, blind fic, blind fic” at me and I wanted to have Dick scoop Damian up.

Rating: Gen

Words: 4,989

Summary:  Damian is struck blind temporarily and while he is recovering Grayson makes it very hard for Damian to keep his promise to himself not to be a burden and rely on his brother.

AO3 Link


Damian was not having a good day. In fact, he was quickly coming to the conclusion that this day would rank in his top ten of the worst days. Well, perhaps not the top ten, but first being attacked by an insane wizard, and then being pronounced ‘blind until further notice’ was enough to rank at least his top fifteen. Perhaps it hit eleven.

“Thanks so much for your help, Zatanna, if there’s anything I can do to repay you–” Grayson was cut off by the woman’s response.

“It was nothing, half of this mess is my fault anyway.” she said.

Damian could feel her looking over at him. He could almost picture the sad turning down of her lips and the bit of regret in her eyes. He wanted to bury himself in the blankets of the medical cot or run from the room. Perhaps even turn and hide his face in Grayson’s chest, his brother was liable to pull him there any instant anyway. Instead he sat up a bit straighter, and tried to look as unaffected as possible. He would not seem weak in front of this woman, especially not now.

“Still, thank you. I don’t know what we would have done if you weren’t here to help us figure this out.”

There was a pause, Damian assumed was her nodding before a her hand found a place on Damian’s shoulder, “It’ll be alright, you know. You could wake up tomorrow and see.” she said.

“Or next month.” Damian grumbled. “Either way, it is an inconvenience I would rather do without.”

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Cracks || BTS Suga

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 1340

Part 2 

You tried to understand that your boyfriend was busy being in an idol group and all. Tours, recordings, music broadcasts, and promotions were tiring. Therefore, you always tried to stay out of his way and cope with the loneliness. It was hard, but you didn’t want to be in his way. You saw your friends more than your own boyfriend. You envied them. Their boyfriends were always texting them or there for them. Yoongi, on the other hand, was always busy. Even when your grandmother passed away, he wasn’t there to comfort you. You never told him. It was hard for you, but you tried to always put on a strong front and smile in front of Yoongi. You didn’t want to be a burden to him.

You don’t know where it went wrong. He was so caring and affectionate toward you in the beginning. After 3 years of dating, however, he stopped texting you every morning, afternoon, and night. Soon, the texts disappeared and so did Yoongi. He stayed at the dorm all the time now. You haven’t seen him for months and he didn’t bother to text or call you.

“You need to be selfish for once noona.”

You were hanging out with Bangtan’s maknae line and Jimin was starting to worry about your relationship with his hyung. You brought lunch over for them knowing they would probably skip it, like always. They were too engrossed in practice to know that their bodies were starving.

“Yeah, Jimin is right. We’ve never seen Yoongi hyung act affectionate with you. You’re always texting us to check up on hyung. That’s not right.”

You thought Jimin and Taehyung were right, but you just couldn’t. You knew if this kept going, one of you will start to fall out of love. This relationship would become toxic.

“Why don’t you go and take the lunches to the hyungs. We’ll continue to practice after eating.”

“Okay Kookie. Remember to rest before going back to practice. You’ll get stomach cramps.”

They nodded and you left to find the other 4. You found them all in the recording studio talking and laughing. Hoseok was the first to jump up and hug you.

“(Y/N) noona!”

He hugged you and you laughed. You were always close to Hobi cause you and him were closest in age.

“Hey Hobi! Hey Namjoon, Seokjin oppa.”

They all hugged you, except for your own boyfriend. You were kind of disappointed, but you quickly got rid of the disappointment in your eyes and held out the lunches you had made for the boys.

“I know you guys would probably skip lunch like always, so I bought you guys something to eat. It may not be as good as Seokjin oppa’s, but it’s edible. The other 3 already tried it.”

“Ey, your food is delicious. But you know, if you need any help with anything, I’m here to help!”

“Thank you oppa.”

Everyone except Yoongi grabbed a lunch box from the bag. The other 3 quickly sensed the tension between the 2 of you and left the 2 of you to talk. You stood there awkwardly as Yoongi went back to work. After a few minutes of just standing, you grabbed a lunchbox and opened it. You set it down in front of Yoongi and turned his chair around.

“Please, take a break and eat.”

“I’m busy if you can’t sense that already.”

Your heart cracked. His harsh tone was enough to cause tears to form.

“I know, but you should at least eat a little. Just a bite?”

You were practically pleading at this point. He could be as cold as he wanted to you, but you wanted him to at least take care of himself. You pushed the lunchbox closer to him only to have it knocked out of your hands and onto his lyric notebook. Your eyes widened and you quickly grabbed his notebook from under the food. You knew how important it was to him. It was his life.

“(Y/N)! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!”

“I’m sor-”

“DO YOU THINK A SORRY IS ENOUGH? YOU COULD’VE RUINED EVERYTHING. You are so lucky it was closed.”

“I said I was sorry. If you just complied.”

“Are you blaming me now? Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

Another crack in your heart.

That was your last straw. It hit some nerve that you never knew even existed. And neither did he.

“LEAVE YOU ALONE? I’VE LEFT YOU ALONE FOR MONTHS NOW! NOT A SINGLE TEXT OR CALL FOR 4 MONTHS AND YOU STILL WANT ME TO LEAVE YOU ALONE? Sometimes I wonder if we’re even in a relationship. You could at least send a text. I’m just asking for one simple, ‘hey’. Is that too much to ask for?”

He was taken aback from your sudden outburst. You were always a quiet person and you always kept calm even in the most frustrating situations.

“I was busy. What’s up with you? You never shout.”

Another crack.

“Maybe if you bothered to care, you would understand why all this is happening.”

“I don’t have time. I wish you would just understand me sometimes. I’m an idol. I can’t be there to comfort you through everything. If you waited a little more, I would’ve been home. Stop being so selfish.”

You were speechless. Everyone around you were right. You have been too nice to Yoongi. He has taken your love for him for granted. The tears you have been holding fell and now all your anger has become sadness.

“Maybe I don’t want to wait anymore. Maybe…maybe, I can’t wait anymore.”

With that, you left. You left him standing there still taken aback from not only your words, but also your tears. You left him to think about where this relationship went wrong. It took him a while to finally figure out that you didn’t just throw a tantrum and leave to cool off. You left him and your relationship with him.

“Hyung, how could you say that to noona?”

“Guys, I’m not in the mood.”

“How could you still say that?! You haven’t talken to her in 4 months. She has to check on her stupid boyfriend through us. She texted us to make sure you were eating, sleeping, and taking care of yourself. She’s texted all of us because she didn’t want to bother you. She’s been understanding. She has been waiting for you and here you are. Working.”

Namjoon scoffed. Jimin shoved 6 phones onto the desk Yoongi was working at. There were endless conversations with you. You telling them to make sure he was alright and healthy. There was even a group chat he wasn’t a part of. And then there was his phone. Empty. Not a single text since 4 months ago. As he finished reading, a sound from everyone’s phone.

(Y/N) : You won’t be hearing from me for a while. Good luck on your comeback. Please don’t tell Yoongi. I’m just a burden.

Hoseok quickly snatched his phone and texted back. After getting another text, he turned to Yoongi and held his phone out for him to see the conversation he just had with you.

Hobi: Where are you going? Please tell me you aren’t leaving.

(Y/N): Remember that offer I got at work to work on a fashion show in Paris. I decided to accept. I’m going to be gone for at least a year or maybe I’ll just stay there.

Yoongi froze. You were leaving. You were leaving him and never coming back. He looked up quickly when he heard another text come in.

(Y/N): Guys, I’m leaving in 2 weeks to Paris. Please don’t tell Yoongi. Tell him I met some other guy or you guys make up some excuse.

You still thought of him even though he didn’t even glance at you for 4 months. Yoongi started to cry. He just ruined a great relationship. He just ruined what could’ve been his wife and the mother to his children. He made the woman he loved the most leave.

boyfriend! s.coups

Originally posted by scoupstv

  • out of all the seventeen members, i’d picture s.coups’ relationship to be the most supportive
  • you both have an understanding and you support one another with whatever they need

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Sometimes I wonder if I can go on without him. Sometimes I wonder if he ever thinks about us. Some nights I lie awake thinking that that reality was all a dream, recounted for an audience, and that it was all part of an organized theatrical play. That life took hold of us and threw us as far from reality as it could. But I didn’t want to force him to stay. I couldn’t put him through my burdens, my spiraling feelings of despair amongst other torn feelings. I wanted to be good enough for him to stay.
—  Excerpt from a book I will never write #1256
02. we don’t talk anymore

Jungkook x Reader
Genre: Angst, Fluff, BestFriends!AU, Artist!Jeon

Ever since he had seen you play the piano for your music class, he’d been inspired by the complete look of tranquility that conquered your features as your fingered danced across the keyboard. He had made that tranquility his soul purpose of drawing. He dreamt of capturing that expression and gifting it to you.

Late nights, he was used to.

Sleepless nights, he was also used to.

But missing you was something he was not.  

These feelings were something completely foreign to him. As Jungkook tossed and turned every night, thoughts of you with him invaded his mind suffocating him. As he sat in his bedroom alone, his eyes frantically searched the room desperately trying to find traces of you. However, his effort was pathetic, it had been months since you’d been in here. Months since you’d seen him and months since he’d seen you. One would say he could always browse your Instagram or Facebook to see you but that was his biggest dread. Fear gripped him by the throat at the thought of stumbling upon a picture of you with him on any of his social networks. 

Jungkook glanced at his alarm clock, the glowing numbers letting him know it was just past 3am. The ungodly hour, you would call it. He smirked to himself remembering how you’d told him this was Satan’s time to lurk and if he was ever up he should go straight back to sleep or call you so you could sing him back to sleep. However, that never happened. It was always him who would sing you to sleep then he’d fall asleep himself to the sound of your soft breaths, wishing he was holding on to you instead of the electronic device.

He glanced at his phone which rested on his bedside table. It had been untouched and utterly dead for days. No one contacted him after you and he didn’t want to contact anyone but you. You were—are his everything. He reluctantly plugged his phone into the charging port. He should probably contact his family, let them know at least through text that was he was fine. His family were used to silence from him, he was an artist. When he was inspired, he would spend weeks attempting to finish his work in complete seclusion, all distracts turned off or turned away. Everyone was evicted from his work space, except you.

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What if Clarke started making that list right at that moment because Bellamy was asleep? because she knew if he were awake, he would insist on being part of the process with her. He would insist on taking part of the burden of taking more lives.

But Clarke didn’t want to put this burden on him– not this one, not after everything he’s endured. So she waited until he was asleep. And then she took out that piece of paper and wrote 98 names, 98 more names than she could bear to write, by herself. All so that Bellamy wouldn’t have to.

When heroes are human & what comes with growth

Trying to get some of my feelings down on this chapter so I want to take a moment to look a little deeper in the imagery used for this panel in particular.

Its really such a chilling panel in its use of shadows and white space, wherein Toshinori is leaving Izuku as the shadows he leaves behind gradually creep up on him, not quite touching him yet but slowly drawing in on him.

These shadows he creates have taken someone else though.

Clear parallels are being made throughout this arc about Nighteye and Izuku, most prominently felt when Toshinori uses the word fan: 

  • admiring the same qualities about All Might
  • wrapped up in his ideals, wanting to be like him
  • breaking the barrier of admirer, aspiring to be worthy of his respect & confidence
  • having deep affection & concern for his well-being
  • and are shocked with the reality of who he is

Not in the way you find out someone you admire is just terrible but just that the person who you admire is flawed in a real way.

This is what I took most from this: All Might, the great and shining hero who left everyone in awe, is very much a flawed human who has hurt those closest to him with his choices and he understands he has but he can’t turn back because that would mean doing something worse, leaving people in fear and what his master gave him was put in the wrong hands.

All Might can’t let go because that’d mean he was wrong, the decision to make sure everyone feels safe and they have this security was not deserved. He can’t back off and let these ideals lose their meaning because that’d mean Toshinori the quirkless kid, who was given a chance by his hero, was a poor choice.

He lives for the all while ignoring the one: himself and those who are close and care for him in a personal way. its the flip side of what is good and righteous, so selfless and in keeping with their ideals they won’t take a step back for themselves. Thats what Izuku is touching on right now, the ideals that seemed so dazzling he missed what it implicates. 

Toshinori has pushed through personal pain and concern for his wellbeing for responsibilities and duties he feels for a whole. He has to keep the peace, he has to provide society with security, its whats held him together for so many years but he’s just a frail man and its scary and sad for Izuku to see this and not fully understand. He thought he knew All Might by now, he thought no matter what All Might had everything together. 

He even thought he knew All Might’s weaknesses except it runs deeper than physical problems.

Toshinori disregards what he has accomplished and done for thoughts of what he can still do, what it is he has to keep doing. These are the shadows he casts over Nighteye, choosing societies security over his own.

Its the truth you come to realize about people, they aren’t perfect, they make mistakes and sometimes what they do will not always agree with you in the end. Its what you get when you get older, the person in your life you accepted would always be right has cracks and those cracks can be scary because it means uncertainty and it means theres not going to be a clean cut answer to all problems, the grey areas start to show. 

All Might wanted to continue being there for the public, putting up a facade, while Sir just wanted him to lead a fulfilling life without understanding Toshinori had given all that up for his career. He could no longer be an average man because everything he’s put himself through has been for the purpose of being that all encompassing hero.

Toshinori knew this was coming. This was the time Izuku was growing past his more childish attitude and was asserting himself, acting every bit the developing teen he is. He’s coming into his own and that means facing something difficult he may not take well. (Sidenote: Toshinori has never given Izuku his real name before, getting that information from Gran Torino, always referring to himself as All Might as though maintaining that image for both their benefits)

Toshinori asks Izuku himself if he’s ready, giving him the chance to go back and be the kid who doesn’t need to know about his demons, he wants to keep him as innocent for as long as he can. This is something he’s put someone in a similar situation through and he regrets it, he doesn’t want to put that pain, disappointment and the weight of who he is on another kid who looks up to him. He didn’t want to let someone else down with who Toshinori is, trying to spare him the shadows he never meant to cast over Nighteye.

But he can’t keep Izuku where he can manage his growth himself, Izuku is impatient and young. The stakes keep going up and more people surrounding him are getting caught in it. He wants results and he wants to be able to accomplish things instead of having more failures, leaving more people in pain thanks to his inexperience.

Izuku has grown so much from the shy, hesitant person he was before who’d give into discouragement and be content with what he has. Izuku is no longer that kid who used to burst with admiration, he’s growing up and part of that is removing the lens you wear when you look at adults/parental figures you admire. Whatever made them perfect in your eyes isn’t the same anymore, seeing them for who they are and knowing there’s something about them that doesn’t fit with what you thought before. 

You have to take the good and the bad with the progress made.

Izuku, for his part, is growing past relying on All Might’s words to carry him, he’s growing into his own and building the confidence and drive to make shit happen. That means holding his own when he’s told he’s not good enough when he would have felt uncertain before.

 And not shying away from conflict when there’s something insidious going on. All Might not telling him this information himself put Izuku’s absolute faith into doubt, he’s learning All Might may not have everything together.

Izuku’s made strides but it means opening up for something less certain. He isn’t disheartened anymore but that doesn’t mean he’ll be told what he does is right, its the first step to learning just how harsh this work really is and his naive beliefs could lead to a worse outcome.

Reality is harsh and his dream is very open to harsher consequence. He has to overcome his naiveté, to adapt and think on his own, what is right and wrong for him and what has to be done. He’s learned he has to come into his own without relying on the image of All Might. But now he has to wonder: ‘whats under that image?’ Its scary to think All Might doesn’t know what he’s doing, your hero might not have a complete handle on life and what he does to himself is self-destructive.

Sir is still stuck on this himself. The shadows that have engulfed Sir Nighteye, the pain Toshinori puts himself through with his lack of self-preservation, are slowly touching on izuku. He starting to know thats who All Might really is, Toshinori the person who has put his image and ideals above himself.

Toshinori says he’s sorry but its not just for the heavy information he’s shared or choosing Midoriya based on chance, its for everything he really is and everything he couldn’t live as. He’s sorry for not ‘truly’ being the man Izuku had looked up to. Toshinori is sorry for the weaknesses he possess and the people who’ve had to carry the burdens he’s put on them. For being the man who, even after losing half his organs, still pushes himself despite knowing he’ll never last and could die in a horrible way in a foreseeable future. He still knows he could die sadly but pushes through that, not wanting to face himself.

He’s sorry for putting Nighteye through his selfishness and letting Izuku know of it; he’s sorry for not ‘successfully’ embodying the ideals he set out for himself.

Its desolate and nerve-racking and it tears away at him, even if he understands whats best. He’ll never be content and rest on his laurels even after being the first OfA successor to land a considerable blow to AfO. He’ll still keep fighting a never ending battle and may never get the peace he deserves, all because he’ll be anxious if he’s not the one to carry it. Never quite accepting his limits.

He can’t turn back, he has to keep going for himself, its his egotism. Its all he can do is to say he’s sorry and keep going forward because he knows what he’s doing will never reach an end. Thats been his flaw, he can’t stop himself from living this life because its the only one he’s accustomed to.

Everything he’s done was in service to be relied on, it makes him feel lost when he’s the one protected. He has to throw himself into the next labor just to have a goal to shoot for in the greater good (getting Shigaraki out of being a villain). If not, it means facing all he’s denied himself to be that symbol.

All Might may have accomplished more than any hero has before and done everything he could for the world but Toshinori will never be content.

It’s important to have these characters highlighted during this flashback. They’ve gone through what All Might has, they’ve witnessed what he has been through and they’ve had to shoulder through the sometimes troubling choices he’s pushed on himself. 

During the sports fest, All Might couldn’t reprimand Izuku because Izuku was berating his own inadequacy for the situation, he sees far too much of himself in Izuku. Izuku had to learn he couldn’t keep breaking his own body to make sure help was given, he had to learn this himself through failure and troubling those around him, knowing he’s not the only one being affected by his reckless actions.

Chiyo had done her best to nip that behaviour in the bud before it got to All Might levels of troubling, she doesn’t want to continue down the same path they’ve gone down before.

All Might may have been the symbol of peace in society but he’s still Toshinori the man who is frail and can only do so much before he’s worn himself thin but he keeps going regardless of protests. And they are the ones who’ve decided to watch over him since they can’t control what he does, guide and advice but still lack what can set him at ease, giving him the peace he needs. 

They were there then and they’ll continue being there for him the best they can.

And thats the drawback of losing your mentor, they’ll always be the perfect hero in your eyes while never learning their shortcomings.

Toshinori will always aspire and never meet his ideals because he’ll believe Nana could have, she’s peerless in his eyes. He’ll never quite meet her faults in the same way Izuku and Sir have and perhaps he’ll never realize this about himself.

In the end, Izuku is left unsettled by all of this coming from his hero.

The shadows All Might leaves behind have enveloped Sir Nighteye and are slowly finding their way to Izuku.