not the party type

How Dan and phil probably broke up #38
  • Phil: *wins all or nothing*
10

Star Trek: The Original Series | The Trouble with Tribbles | Let Him Read In Peace

Mbti Types as Millennials You’ll Meet

Disclaimer: this post is purely for amusement & LOLs ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ 

ISTJ: TRADITIONALIST 
- has a fetish for Mon-Fri 9 to 5 jobs + benefits 
- traditional AF 
- this species is v endangered, please donate 
- has had the same goals and dreams since they were a fetus 
- productive member of society™ 

 ESTJ: YUPPIE
- working 27/9 on multiple projects, multiple jobs & multiple underlings to command
- getting more stuff done than you’ll ever do in your lifetime
- somehow has a neater desk than you but knows how to party it up when they’re finally off hours
- fav type of party is a networking party
- actually has time and money to Netflix 

 INTJ: COLLECTORS
- is on all the social medias but almost never posts
- knows all the tings but never really says it
- v secretive
 - will low-key become a billionaire overnight for starting a very important company that no one has heard of 

 ENTJ: YOUR BOSS
- is the only person who actually knows what they’re doing
- started taking on leadership roles since birth (re: shoved the doctor out of the way to cut their own umbilical cord)
- shows love via loud criticism – is only trying to help you help yourself
- so DONEEE with incompetence 

 ISFJ: MILLENNIAL MOM
- shares so many Facebook posts that fb definitely knows who they voted for/where they shop at/intimate details even they don’t know
- actually writes Amazon reviews (thank you)
- replies to all messages from fam within 30 seconds
- attends annual mom convention just to maintain their status (Level 10 Mom Friend™) 

 ESFJ: FOODIES
- has multiple social platforms to display their culinary skills (STATUS: black belt)
- charming AF but WILL throw shade if provoked
- hair is goals
- listed on Huffington Post as top 21 Pinterest users to follow 

 INTP: THE FUTURE™
- obsessed with the possibilities of the future
- topics all INTPs are pre-programmed to get excited about: AI, start-ups, technology, STEM jokes
- may combust when stupid arguments are portrayed as facts
- procrastination level: over 9000 

 ENTP: BROGRAMMERS
- speaks a foreign language invented by them
- beer parties & philosophical debates are always lit
- pretty WOKE actually
- Nerd™ 

 INFJ: MODERN HIPSTER
- had first quarter life crisis at 15
- your official therapist
- writes self-love/compassion/know-yourself/nostalgia posts for a website
- stares through a window from time to time looking contemplative 

 ENFJ: GRASSROOTS CHAMPION
- actually has their life together despite repeat quarter life crises
- persuasive AF
- “I do what I want, I don’t need your validation … but also I consider how it affects everyone around me and how I’ll be perceived”
- won Volunteer of the Year award every year for the last 5 years; got promoted to presenting the Volunteer of the Year award instead 

 ENFP: EXUBERANTS
- lives off of the Likes of friends and random Internet strangers
- needs social validation through an IV drip
- will most likely die of FOMO
- life motto: pics or it didn’t happen
- golden retriever but looks like a person (cute either way) 

 INFP: UNDEREMPLOYED
- Feelings™
- overqualified for all the jobs but doesn’t know what jobs they actually care enough to apply for
- posts are always either WOKE AF or self-deprecating
- hopes and dreams are on life support 

 ESTP: WANDERLUST™
- bucket-list longer than Santa’s list
- only has semi-naked pics on Tinder
- knows the most important words in every language (i.e. “what’s your phone number”)
- no honey, don’t call them; yes, they’re definitely seeing other people 

 ISTP: SHUT OUTs
- self-employed
- will low-key land a steady 6 figure job for being in the right place at the right time 
- moonlights as a hand model
- credit card ebills show 20% of income spent on Redbull/coffee 

 ESFP: YOUTUBE VLOGGER
- EXTRA AF™
- somehow amassed a HUGE following from weekly 10 minute videos about their day
- will fake their death if no one is paying attention to them
- actually really savage
- sparkly 

 ISFP: PROFESSIONAL SELFIES TAKER
- living embodiment of the word “aesthetic”
- hair/style/make-up/art is goals
- snapchat game is on point
- etsy is only their side hussle
- flower crowns filters 

The Signs as Crushes I've Had

Aries: the prettiest smile and the weirdest laugh, long, gorgeous hair, unintentionally funny, always wanted to go on adventures with me, tall and handsome

Taurus: seemed like a fuckboy, turned out to be the sweetest most caring lil cutie, was ready to do anything and everything for me, first love, would pick me up for late night drives, loved cuddling

Gemini: quirky and cute, definitely a fuckboy, thoughtful, deep thinker and great to have serious conversations about life with, heartbreaker

Cancer: seemed weird at first, was weird but also so caring, sweet, smart and funny, wanted everyone to be happy, GREAT body, very sexy without knowing it, someone i had lots of fun with

Leo: fun to be around, giggly and jokey, breathtakingly beautiful, amazing at singing, loved animals more than anything, good at sports, first girl crush

Virgo: sarcastic, beautiful on the outside but GORGEOUS on the inside, gave actually great advice, philosophical, gamer girl, good party host

Libra: tried to seem harsh and cool but actual sweetheart once i got to know him, always wanted me to read his favourite books, creative and handy, helpful in all situations

Scorpio: looked like someone from a band, an asshole at first but very cute and great listener, was always low-key sad, pushed me away when i wanted to help him, smelled ridiculously good

Sagittarius: (also my sign) seemed goofy, funny and caring at first but turned out to be the biggest fuckboy, helped me realise new things about myself, hot and handsome, great for having a laugh with, loved going to parties with him

Capricorn: always wanted the best for me, the type of person who always checked i got home safe, protective, supportive, kinda serious most of the time but goofy when we were alone

Aquarius: straight to the point, honest, great athlete and singer, best hugger, weird humour, very masculine, the one you’ll never completely get over

Pisces: sweet, emotional, fell in love fast, big music fan, great at school even though he wouldn’t admit it, quite jealous, if he likes you he will always put you first no matter what, the kind of person i wanted to protect at all costs, clingy

something that really bothers me about tumblr is that they try to make slytherin’s the “edgy rebels.” 

the slytherin house values/stands for traditionalism. they aren’t going to be getting tattoos or dying their hairs crazy colors. they are going to be polished. wearing heels, wearing satin and lace, have freshly painted nails, wear heels the click against the pavement, wear tailored suits with ties. they are going to have eyeliner so on point and sharp that it could cut through glass.

they aren’t the type to wear combat boots, be edgy, get tattoos, or dye their hair crazy colors. sure, there are exceptions to every rule.. but slytherin’s are the type to have classy wine parties. they are resourceful because they have people skills, they know how to get what they want in a subtle way. they are sneaky and cunning when they want to be. they are polished, and they will follow the rules they want to follow. if they break the rules, it will be quietly. they won’t make a loud statement, they will only make a quiet statement that makes you wonder, “how did that even happen?”

they are a class act. always keeping people on their toes, and always making them think they’re innocent. 

they are like a snake. quiet, sneaky, and they appear cold on the outside.. when really they just want to protect their own. they are quiet, but they’re deadly. it is their mascot for a reason. all the houses mascots represent the people in those houses.

gryffindors are a lion because they charge, they are loud when crossed. they make loud statements by breaking rules or creating them. they want justice. they are like a lioness protecting their cubs when their values are crossed. they roar. 

hufflepuffs are a badger, because badgers are underestimated. they are fierce creatures and badass, but they look cute on the outside. they will be loyal and fight for what they believe in until the very end. 

and ravenclaws are eagles because eagles represent freedom. ravenclaws are all about free expression. eagles also represent wisdom. it shows that you can fly and be free, but you can also see things in the sky others can’t see. 

  • Travis: Nadia thinks that Remy is a failure.
  • Griffin: Uhm??????? How dare you? He's perfect and there is no way we can have any type of negative thoughts between members of a party?????
  • Justin: Irene thinks Nadia is a literal demon from hell.
  • Travis: 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌there👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit
Suga Daddy

Suga Daddy

Word count: 7.8k

Genre: smut

Yoongi gives you an offer you can’t refuse

This idea was loosely based on this vine. I just really wanted a daddy Yoongi story :) 

Also, i’m sure this title is used all the time but it was too perfect. This is my first Yoongi fic so let me know what you think.

{Playlist} Parts: one | two | three | four | five | six 

You had just gotten to back from class to your duplex. You lived in a very nice part of town for almost a year now. It was strange, even after ten months you were still getting used to all this. You’d come from a pretty wealthy family, but when you decided that you were going to go to school for dance and not to medical school your parents cut you off.

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MBTI Contradictions

These are just for fun so don’t take it too seriously people, each type is Amazing!!

ESFJ: Uptight Party Animal 

ISFJ: Meticulously compliant

ESTJ: Really doesn’t care, but thats all they tend to talk about regardless

ISTJ: Devotes all their time and energy into something, hates every minute of it

ENFJ: Their bubbling happiness puts others into a bad mood

INFJ: Brilliant and stupid at the same time

ENTJ: Controls themselves with dignity, loses their temper at the drop of a hat

INTJ: Wants to conquer the world, never wants to be left in charge of anything

ESFP: Sensitive marshmallow always causing arguments

ISFP: Dramatic but calm

ESTP: Dad disguised as skateboarder

ISTP: Calculated spontaneity 

ENTP: Doesn’t care about you, but totally cares about you

INTP: Warm robot

ENFP: Timidly outgoing

INFP: Has plans of revenge written down in their cute kitten notebook

one more time (m)

genre: fuckboy au + smut

words: 5.5k

member: jimin 

you can’t resist jimin, even if he is a fuckboy.

Originally posted by 9taefox


You woke up to the sound of your ringtone blaring into your ear. You huffed, screwing your eyes shut and hoping it would stop; it didn’t. Reaching out, you grabbed your phone and squinted at the bright screen, your eyes needing time to adjust.

Jimin.

You sighed through your nostrils, closing your eyes and ignoring the impending headache that you could already feel starting in your temples. You debated not answering, and the call ended. You nearly let a smile form on your lips, but your phone began to vibrate in your hand again, Jimin’s name popping up once again as the sound of your ringtone kept you from sleeping.

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⇁ nudes, not flowers | 01

Originally posted by bangtannoonas

pairing⇁Hoseok x reader x Jungkook

genre⇁smut || fuckboi!au

warningspublic sex, slight voyeurism/exhibitionism, dirty talk, dom!junghope, demeaning names during sex if you aren’t into that, jealousy

word count5.5k

You’re not supposed to fall for Jung Hoseok and his repertoire of awful pick-up lines—but you do. The problem is: he’s afraid of commitment, and bolts at the idea of settling down. After that, you decide to stay far away from fuckboys, but his friend decides to test your new found resolutions.

or : Jungkook wants to see how far he can push Hoseok until he snaps 

01 | 02  ⇁ sequel 

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MBTI types at party

Can’t wait for it and stay enthusiast for all time: ESFP, ESTP, ESFJ, ENFJ, ENTP, ISFJ, INFP, INFJ, ISTP

Talk to few people: INTP, ISFP, INFP, INFJ, ISTJ, INTJ, ENTJ, ENTP, ESFJ, ENFJ, ENTJ, ESTJ

Talk to strangers for new friendship (if interested): ESFP, ESTP, ENFJ, ESFJ, ENFP, ENTP, ISFJ, INFJ, ISTP

Have fun at party but have headache: ISFP, INFP, ISFJ, ISTJ, INTP, INTJ, ENFP, ESTP, ENTP

“I shouldn’t have gone”: ENTJ, INTJ, INTP, ENTP, ISTP, ESTP, INTP

Go to the party just if their best friend(s) go: All types