not the best thing i've ever did

10

Diana: […] she’s disinclined to stay at home since her companion died.

Anne: Her companion?

Diana: Her best friend forever and ever.

Diana: Aunt Josephine never married. Neither of them did. They lived with each other their whole lives.

Anne: I’d live with you forever if I could, but I know you’ll leave me the day you get married to some wealthy and handsome gentleman. 

Anne: I hate him already.

they Did That™

Me, Doing College Theatre: “Why do we keep doing all these Weird as Shit™ shows? Wouldn’t we get more butts in seats if we did musicals?”

Me, now, doing Butts-in-Seats-Musicals: “Hokay, please direct me towards the Weird Shit. I would like one Weird Shit Play, please.”

All I can think of right now is Bitty with a big dog

That is a concept I thoroughly enjoy. Just Bitty at his home in Georgia, cuddling his best friend who is probably twice his size in his room or something. Or when he leaves for college, his dog running up to him and almost tackling him to the ground. Bitty bringing Jack home and having him meet this big, furry dog and Jack looking at Bitty like “how did you not get crushed”. Bitty and Jack getting a big dog of their own, spending their days off cuddling each other, and the dog laying right besides them in bed.

BTS as things I heard at the Highschool pt.2
  • Seokjin:
  • "-it was the only one left, and she ate it... and she was like 'sorry' and I was like 'okay', but really I was so mad like what the FUCK bitch that was the LAST ONE!"
  • Yoongi:
  • "Did you have violin lessons?"
  • "No! I went to go... see... my friends... dad...?"
  • Hoseok: "FUCK this is so cool! Best 25 cents I've ever spent"
  • Namjoon:
  • "I've spent $200 on pizza slices and soda... and I don't even like pizza."
  • Jimin:
  • "I remember one time I just shot a gun so I'd have company, but the cops didn't even show up."
  • Taehyung:
  • "Oh hey you guys!"
  • "Hey."
  • "Hi!"
  • "Um, hi..."
  • "Okay bye!"
  • "Bye?"
  • Jungkook (ft Jimin:
  • "Please don't hit my butt"
  • "I won't"
  • "Thank you"
  • *Smacks ass*
  • Takenaka: Alright, Kageyama, I've decided it's finally time to read your mind and see what you're really thinking.
  • Shigeo: Ok
  • Shigeo, internally: Broccoli is the most noxious vegetable in the damn world. I never want to have anything to do with it again. I hate broccoli so much, I hope it gets completely shredded in the blazing pressure of the atmosphere and never comes back. I hope aliens are real so they can abduct it and do horrific experiments on it before eradicating it permanently from existence in the most painful way possible. Alas, my vengeance still waits; my mother served broccoli in stir fry for dinner last night and I almost cried at the dinner table in front of God and everyone. Not that my expression would give it away, but it's the truth. I was almost brought to tears by a cooked vegetable. She had no way of knowing, bless her. She won't know. She can never know. The secret of my grudge against the broccoli must stay in my heart forever. Broccoli takes out everything that is good in this world if you let it take root. These health fads going around somehow still worship it like it's some sort of health god... I'll admit it's good for you, but their faith only makes the foul thing stronger and more palpable in its malcontent. The fools. The disrespectful, ungrateful naïveté disgusts me. Why should I shoulder this burden, this knowledge and pain of the truth, the real truth, all alone, while they continue on, still worshipping it in the face my loss. Nobody knows the trouble I've seen. Nobody knows my sorrow. Fuck broccoli.
  • Takenaka: Dude, what the fuck????? What did broccoli ever do to you?! Kill your best friend in some weird and horrific manner? Make everyone you know and love turn on you? Steal your life and identity?!
  • Shigeo:
  • Takenaka:
  • Shigeo:
  • Takenaka:
  • Shigeo:
  • Takenaka:
  • Shigeo: Yes.

I think in the next Star Trek movie they should have John De Lancie somewhere in the background just randomly watching. He’s deciding if he should make official contact yet or wait a few more generations. He never says anything about the Q or anything at all but we’ll know

we’ll know

‘Moho’ callout post

Now I’m warnin’ ya kiddies, shit’s about to get graphic
( @moho-milk-town-and-power-down )

You know that one fellow popular on tumblr about making two fictional characters fuck eachother, right? Y’all may call her as your ‘bean king’, the one true god ‘Moho’…

but i’m here to say

she’s not what she tells everyone she is..

See here, Being a detective that I am, I have proven that she is not JUST a furry in disguise… but..

“Nya”…

…. a fokin’ Weeb…

EVEN AFTER I, THE WELL KNOWN (notreally) FoX-THE-DOESNT-TWIST-THE-TRUTH, HAVE CONFRONTED HER ABOUT IT AS SHE TRIES TO GO BACK ON THE FACT OF REVEALING WHO SHE REALLY IS

BUT OH NO NO!!
It doesn’t stop there kiddies.

moments later…

she reveals that…

She’s sexually attracted to Barry Bee Benson..
YES! I CAN HEAR YOU GASPING “b-but ивана,, just bc she called a bee daddy doesn’t make her fully attracted to be-” shut your fucking mouth-hole voice in my head,,
What if I told you..

She has fully admitted to the illegal crime that is to “fuck bees”
*slams paperwork on table*
I WILL SINGLE-HANDEDLY (single-paw…edly..??) SUE THE BEE-RACE

I have even found visual proof of all of this!!

shE WAS CAUGHT ON CAMERA SLEEPING WITH A FUCKING B E E

if this is not enough evidence, you’re blind. WAKE UP AMERICA

What do you mean I’m making this post bc im pissed that my wife cheated on me with a bee//
You’re

no

i’m,,
I’m not racist towards bees,, just,,-
*starts sobbing* whY DID YOU LEAVE ME FOR A BEE, I T-THOUGHT W-WE HAD SOMETHINGGG aaAAAHH

–F-Fuck bees man,, 
I’m just so

Hurt q-q




*coughs* SO! Next time on Dramaalert nation™ we’ll have a full on discussion about the 100 reasons why Pent is best daddy-

heathers sentence starters; part one
  • "Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw."
  • "If you were happy every day of your life you wouldn't be a human being. You'd be a game-show host."
  • "Now that's deep."
  • "When teenagers complain that they want to be treated like human beings, it's usually because they are being treated like human beings."
  • "My teen-angst bullshit now has a body count."
  • "Greetings and salutations."
  • "Maybe we could rent some new releases and pop some popcorn."
  • "Chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling!"
  • "You inherit 5 million dollars the same day aliens land on the earth and say they're going to blow it up in 2 days. What do you do?"
  • "That's the stupidest question I've ever heard."
  • "You look like hell."
  • "God! I sound like a fucking psycho."
  • "Real life sucks losers dry."
  • "You're beautiful."
  • "I felt bad every time I did it but I kept doing it anyway."
  • "Praise Jesus, Hallelujah."
  • "I don't patronize bunny rabbits."
  • "You know, I have a little prepared speech I tell my suitor when he wants more than I'd like to give him."
  • "What's your damage?"
  • "Suicide is a private thing."
  • "The extreme always seems to make an impression."
  • "I just killed my best friend."
  • "If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?"
  • "How very."
  • "Well they, uh, seem to have an open door policy for assholes though, don't they?"
  • "I like it. It's got that what-a-cruel-world-let's-toss-ourselves-in-the-abyss type ambiance."
  • "I say we just grow up, be adults and die."
  • "The only place different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven."
  • "You know what I want? Cool guys like you out of my life."
  • "We realized we could never reveal our forbidden love to an uncaring and un-understanding world."
  • "Jesus H. Christ!"
  • "Is your life perfect?"
  • "Well, it's just like - they're people I work with, and our job is being popular and shit."
  • "They should throw his/her ass in jail."
  • "Just another case of a geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably."
  • "You're a rebel? You think you're a rebel? You're not a rebel, you're fucking psychotic!"
  • "Why are you pulling my dick?"
  • "Our love is God."
  • "Let's go get a slushie."
  • "Why do you have to be such a mega-bitch?"
  • "I'm worshiped."
  • "What the fuck?"
  • "I knew that loose was too noose... uh... noose too loose..."
  • "Did that sound bitchy?"
  • "This kind of thing leaves a bad taste in my mouth."
  • "Lick it up, baby. Lick. It. Up."
  • me, when Renjun posts a selfie: wow!! amazing!! talent!! my boy Did That! Ladies and gents, this just in, Huang Renjun has single handedly saved kpop with his face, and oh what A Face it is. Does life imitate art or does art imitate life? Who gives a fuck, because this picture is Both. The best thing I've ever seen. The photo of the century. No selfie by anyone Ever could be half as good as this true masterpiece which he has just blessedt my eyes with.
  • Renjun: *posts another selfie*
  • me: this is it, you guys, the best thing that I have ever laid my eyes on. no like I don't think you understand, I really mean The Best-

littleamericanduck  asked:

Ennoshita's "do it for Daichi" shirt is the best thing I've ever seen

it’s all fun and games until daichi sees him wearing the shirt and ennoshita decides to avoid him for an entire week

Entente

“It’s silent for another minute before she hears Benvolio’s clothes rustle next to her. ‘Did you ever love … him?’

Glancing at Benvolio, Rosaline eyes him warily, her suspicion getting the better of her. His eyes are soft and searching under the candlelight, and it is then when Rosaline realizes there’s no malice behind his question – he genuinely wants to know.”

Rosaline and Benvolio reach a tentative truce, because the world will always be against them and it’s time they stop fighting against the inevitable. As the saying goes, keep your friends close and keep your … spouse closer. For reasons. 

Future fic (they’re married), Rosaline x Benvolio

Ao3 or read below

She dips her finger inside the jam, watching the red color dye her skin like blood on a pavement. Rosaline examines it for another moment before popping her finger inside her mouth and tasting the jam, letting its sweetness consume her. There are several more pastries littered around the kitchen counter where she sits, each with a different and unique taste. Smiling, Rosaline stuffs her mouth with the half-eaten dessert, and eyes another one to devour.

It’s become a late night tradition for Rosaline, sneaking down the servant’s stairways in order to grab whatever dessert is left. When her mother and father were alive, she never sought out sweets as a child. Her parents touted her as a good daughter for not succumbing to the siren call of sugar, but she didn’t realize how much she would miss the taste of sweet tarts and pastries until her aunt forbade her from eating so.

For three years, she and Livia ate food fit for a peasant, such as stews, bread, and occasional fruit. Yet as a Montague – nay, a Capulet-Montague – Rosaline has access to so many sweets she feels she might faint. She feels naughty, tiptoeing across the house, but following the rules has never been Rosaline’s strong suit.

Life as a Capulet-Montague is … strange. After their failed attempt to stop their marriage, things have only gotten more tense between them. Her relationship with Benvolio consists of bickering and pushing each other to the limit. Sometimes, their fights can start by disagreeing on which dish is the best, before it quickly spirals out of control and they begin to attack each other’s characters.

She suspects he continues to argue with her because he needs to release his frustration, too. Their marriage is one of convenience for their families, and she’s come to stop blaming Benvolio for something he had no hand in doing. As much as Rosaline doesn’t want to admit it, they must work together in order to survive. They will always be punished for not being Juliet and Romeo, and not being united will only harm them.

Regardless, Rosaline’s too stubborn to extend an olive branch to Benvolio, so for now, they’ll continue bickering until it stops providing them an excuse to yell at one another.

Rosaline’s so deep in her thoughts that she doesn’t realize Benvolio has entered the room, confused by her presence just as she is of his. She stops chewing on the pastry, feeling awkward for getting caught, but her curiosity gets the better of her. 

“I thought you had gone to bed.”

He gives a tight smile. His shirt is untucked and he looks tired, probably due to running errands for his uncle. There’s something else troubling his mind, she can see it.

“Ah yes, my wonderful bed on the floor. I do enjoy having the cold bricks stab my back as I sleep.”

Keep reading

comicsansposts  asked:

It's okay I've been through it to, the best thing to do is calm down and it just sorta.. comes to you, You just KNOW, y'know? I don't want you to stress out like I did, so please take it slow, you don't need to know it in one day

I’ve kept this message in my head ever since I got it. It has really helped me a lot with figuring out my identity. Keeping it slow and not rush it, like you advised.

So thank you, @comicsansposts :’)

Imagine that, during the possible CIA break out, after Amanda, Vogel have reunited with the rest of the Rowdy Three, they find themselves in a corridor; them lined up at one end and, at the other, the unlucky agents who’ve been sent to subdue the Rowdy Three. Just before they begin to attack, one of the agents notices Amanda – there are meant to be four members of the Rowdy Three, not five. Confused, and hoping one of their teammates knows which project Amanda belongs to, an agent shouts, ‘What does she do?’

           Hearing them, Amanda replies, ‘I play the drums!’

           All of the agents are now confused. Can playing the drums be a physic power? If so, how? Are the Rowdy Three actually a punk band? Is Friedkin really that incompetent? How did they get picked for what is definitely the worse assignment ever?

           Meanwhile, the Rowdy Three think that Amanda’s response is the best thing ever (and maybe a band isn’t such a bad idea) and takes it as the sign to charge.

           ‘I play the drums!’ becomes Amanda’s official battle cry.

I wanted to do something fancy with my Poe Dameron cosplay today for May the 4th, but I felt so sick I couldn’t find the energy.

But I did want to join the glitter for Carrie thing, so my holographic glitter BB-8 shirt will have to do.

Thanks to @thebibliosphere’s stream for giving me just a little bit of energy to post this~~