not sure if i got the line right

Company Truck, Seriously?

This happened over the weekend. I work weekends and was on my way to work. To get there I take a freeway. As every driver SHOULD know, but doesn’t. The left lane is for people traveling faster and slower drivers should move right to let them pass.

Now I am sure this is a pretty common problem in every city where you get people who are too clueless, or distracted to actually move over. This causes traffic congestion, and basically makes those shitty commutes that much shittier.

So as I am going to work, I am doing slightly above 100km/h in the 100km/h zone. I quickly approach some cars in the fast lane doing 80km/h. Unfortunately, there was another car in the right lane matching that speed. They would not pass each other.

We came by an exit and the car in the slow lane exited. The guy in the fast lane sped up until he got to the next slow car, where he matched again. It was just enough that no one could pass him in the slow lane.

After dealing with this guy for the better part of my drive, he finally signals to the right lane and the exit. As the long line of cars in the fast lane pass, he is having a grand time laughing and flipping the middle finger. I’m sure he got it back, but what a piece of shit.

That’s when I noticed that he was in a company vehicle. I took note of the company name and website, then continued on to work.

Once at work I pulled up his website and saw that he was just a small private company. He listed his home address, which is about 45 minutes to the east of the city (along the exit he took).

I ran across the street to the gas station with one of the few remaining pay phones still in operation. I called him up and asked him to come give me a quote on a massive rush job. I booked the appointment for 10am at a location that was 1.5 hours west of the city. In total, that would be 3 hours each direction.

He gladly accepted the job thinking it would be a big one. I’ve never been to the area I sent him.

anonymous asked:

I am also a sucker for your top 10 worldbuilding posts so here's another one: top 10 times the media got some TMI on Victor and Yuuri's relationship (and does it include Victor drunkenly revealing they switch to tabloids and Chris' speech at the wedding about where they've done the nasty?)

The wedding was strictly family and friends only so Chris’ speech never got made public (Yuuri would have died if it did!) but there have been several incidents where the media learned a lot more about Viktor and Yuuri than they ever expected.

Top 10 Times The Media Got Some TMI On Victor and Yuuri’s Relationship:

10) Once - when Yuuri was competing in the Four Continents and Viktor was on the side-lines to cheer him on - during the warm up Yuuri was practicing his quad flip over and over to make sure he got it right while Viktor was doing an interview at the side of the rink and the reporter sort of offhandedly mentioned ‘oh, Katsuki has been doing jumps for a while now and he doesn’t even look tired, I guess it must be true that he has really good stamina’ and Viktor just went really dreamy eyed and said ‘yes’ while completely ignoring the interviewer and gazing at Yuuri. And the reporter and the camera man just ended up looking at each other like ‘should we finish the interview or just let him keep daydreaming about his sex life?’

9) During the season after the end of chapter 14 Viktor’s exhibition skate was the Stay Close To Me duet and afterwards one of the reporters asked Yuuri ‘were you ever concerned about doing the lifts during the routine? Were you sure Nikiforov was going to be able to hold your weight or were you worried he might drop you?’. And Yuuri was just like ‘No, I had faith in him and we already knew he could lift me up pretty easily anyway’ which he probably would have gotten away with if he hadn’t proceeded to go bright red afterwards when he realised what he’d said and everyone who watched it was like ‘we kind of really want to know but at the same time we probably really don’t.’

8) After Viktor finally retired he was doing a joint interview with Yuuri and one of the reporters asked him if he was concerned about maintaining his physical condition now that he wasn’t competing anymore because lots of athletes have a hard time adjusting once they stop such vigorous training regimes. And Viktor was just like, ‘I’m sure it won’t be a problem, I’ll still be getting some pretty intense regular exercise even if I’m not training anymore’ and winked at Yuuri and Yuuri started blushing really badly while all the reporters went into minor meltdowns

7) Once they ended up being caught by reporters a few days after Viktor’s birthday when they were out taking the dogs for a walk and it was mostly fine but one of the reporters asked Yuuri what he had given Viktor as a birthday present and they both went bright red and Yuuri sort of mumbled a hurried and fake sounding answer that probably wasn’t even in English and practically sprinted off. No-one ever found out exactly what Viktor’s ‘present’ was but there was a lot of speculation and the general consensus became that Yuuri Katsuki was probably a lot kinkier than anyone ever expected and Viktor Nikiforov was a very lucky guy.  

6) This one came in a series of tweets from a fan who was in an upmarket hotel bar which basically consisted of, ‘oh my god Viktor Nikiforov is in the same bar as I am what should I do?’ ‘He’s sitting alone do you think I should go and talk to him? Would it be weird to ask for his autograph?’ ‘I wonder why Katsuki isn’t with him, it’s the off season I thought they’d be together’ ‘Oh my god I just noticed he isn’t wearing his ring what does this mean?’ ‘He just started to talk to a guy who sat down next to him and he’s being really flirty oh my god.’ ‘Is Viktor Nikiforov having an affair????’ ‘Help, red alert I’ve just seen Viktor Nikiforov in a bar chatting up some random guy without his ring on what do I do?’ ‘Oh wait a minute the guy he was talking to just turned around and it turns out it was actually Katsuki after all. Panic over.’ ‘Wait a minute Katsuki isn’t wearing his ring either, they can’t have both lost them at the same time can they?’ ‘They’re acting really weirdly though and they’re dressed differently too I’m confused but I don’t want to interrupt’ *several minutes pause* ‘Well something I definitely didn’t expect to happen tonight was finding out that Katsuki and Nikiforov are apparently into role play but you learn something new every day.’

5) After being apart for a long time during the skating season they finally reunited at an airport and it was all very dramatic and Viktor ended up kissing Yuuri really passionately for a really long time. And when they broke away Yuuri was like ‘that reminded me of our first kiss, after the competition in Saitama.’ And Viktor was like ‘I did a lot more than just kiss you then solnyshko’ being all sly and flirty and then they both sort of froze as they realised that A) they were in a very public airport which is not a good place to be heavily flirting even if you have been apart for several months and B ) Several people were not so discreetly filming them. And that was how the world learned exactly when and where Viktor and Yuuri got it on for the first time.

4) During the four continents after they first got together Viktor ended up doing the thing in he did in the anime where he tied Yuuri’s laces and kissed his skates while being there to support him. And at that point their public relationship was still only a few months old so while the reaction was mainly positive there were still some assholes who were salty about the whole thing including one trashy tabloid reporter who cornered Yuuri after his skate who was obviously a die-hard Viktor fan and didn’t like him or their relationship at all. And while Yuuri is usually quiet and shy and likes to keep as much about their relationship private as he can because he doesn’t want the world butting in, he also is absolutely savage when he wants to be and after going through so much to finally get together with Viktor he is not willing to take any shit from anyone. So the reporter was being really bitchy and asking questions like ‘don’t you think it’s a bit degrading to make Viktor Nikiforov get down on his knees for you?’ and Yuuri just really calmly said ‘not really, he likes it too much’, smiled and walked away. The video clip of it happening has several million views.

3) At one point Viktor and Yuuri were on the beach at Hasetsu and Viktor took a picture of Yuuri in his boxers (they had forgotten their swimming stuff but got too hot and went to cool off in the sea) and nothing else while laughing on the beach. And while 99.9% of the comments were all along the lines of ‘goddamn’, ‘please step on me’ and ‘Yuuri Katsuki with his shirt off is a gift to humanity’ there were a couple off assholes who were commenting on the stretch marks on Yuuri’s thighs. Because he was a naturally chubby kid with a lot of puppy fat and went from that to a lean athletic teenager in a very short space of time so he has them although they’re not that noticeable. And Viktor doesn’t usually care when people are rude to him online because there are always a few shitty people out there but it really pisses him off when someone insults Yuuri. So when someone tweeted him like ‘you’re really hot, why do you bother with someone with ugly stretch marks like Katsuki?’ he responds with ‘I love every part of my boyfriend including his marks. I especially like to kiss them every night when his thighs are wrapped round my head.’ which pretty much shut all the haters up there and then. Yuuri hit him with a pillow for it afterwards but he was secretly kind of pleased.

2) The day after one of the major competitions Yuuri was giving an interview and the interviewer asked ‘now that the competition is over has the tiredness set in yet and are you ready to go home or are you still riding high on the adrenaline from last night?’ and Chris, who happened to be walking past at that moment, was just like ‘well he was certainly riding something last night but it wasn’t the adrenaline.’ Yuuri’s expression after he said it became a popular reaction picture for when someone looks like they physically want to die of embarrassment.

1) The incident I mentioned in a previous ask where a tipsy Viktor ends up getting interviewed by a tabloid reporter when his tongue is looser than usual so when she asks ‘are you the top or the bottom in your relationship’ aka the question everyone else wanted to ask but was way too polite and respectful to, he just winked and said ‘why pick just one.’ And that was how the world found out that Viktor and Yuuri switch.

Let Me Protect You - Mitch Rapp

Author: @mf-despair-queen

Characters: Mitch Rapp/Reader

Word Count: 11,337

Warnings: WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN? 18+, NSFW, Oral (both receiving), Orgasm Denial, Multiple Orgasms, Daddy Kink, Shower Sex, Wall Sex, Bondage, Mitch’s Scruff, Mitch’s sexy ass arms and muscles and abs and face and MITCH’S ENTIRE BEING

Notes: Holy. Shit. It’s long overdue but THAT WORD COUNT??? I am dying inside from this. I hope you dirty people like this. Please let me know because this literally killed me inside to write. 

Keep reading

Jeremy Bulloch on his lines as Boba Fett (feat. Temuera Morrison and Daniel Logan egging him on) at Star Wars Celebration Orlando

Bulloch: Boba Fett has seven lines and a scream.

Morrison: You couldn’t give us that scream, could you?

Bulloch: [screams for approximately eight seconds]

Morrison: That’s talent, that’s talent, right there. I can see why you got the part.

DAMIAN EXISTS!!!

So I was watching the latest episode of Powerless and something caught my attention. So this episode dealt with Van McFuckface trying to become Robin (which coincidentally is the plot of the only issue that he actually exists in) and one of the scientists dudes said something along the lines of “You do know that two Robins supposedly died on the job, right?”

We know for sure that one of them is Jason because he’s always the dead one but I got to wondering which of the other boys was the other dead Robin. Technically all of them have died at some point. Dick’s death was faked but he’s still dead in the public eye for a while. Tim disappeared recently but is believed to be dead by the public. Damian actually died and was murdered fairly publicly. 

Now hear me out here, Dick and Tim were no longer Robins when they died so technically speaking Damian is the only other Robin besides Jason that died ‘on the job.’ 

What does this mean? Damian exists/existed as Robin in the universe that Powerless has set up. It also means my desire for Damian to step in and take over Van McFuckface’s job for an episode or two is very much possible. 

the elevator scene analysis

so here’s my over-analysis on the elevator scene that nobody asked for. i hope you’re ready for Keith being a pining little shit

so Lance decides to check out the pool. of course he would! he grew up on the beach and is the guardian spirit of water. that’s totally something he’d be all over. he loves swimming.

so it’s kinda interesting that Keith of all people would also want to go swimming. he’s the polar opposite of Lance, he’s the fire paladin. water isn’t really his thing tbh? (doesn’t mean he can’t enjoy swimming though, but you get what i mean)

while it could just be coincidental that he decided to go check out the pool at the same time Lance did, i get the feeling Keith found out Lance was going swimming and wanted to join him but pretended that he didn’t know what Lance was doing ‘cause he doesn’t wanna make it obvious that there’s something else he wants to check out

what do you mean “what do you think you’re doing?” Keith??? he’s wearing swim trunks and a towel and is on the same elevator as you how can you not make the obvious conclusion that he’s going swimming???? you’re a terrible liar 

okay look, i know how i get when i have a crush on somebody. i will find literally any excuse to be around them, but will try to downplay it and make it seem like i totally don’t care. i’d recognize that kinda behavior anywhere. and Keith? totally trying to downplay it right now. “i just so happened to want to go swimming at the same time my crush did and stopped him in the elevator before he could go without me but pffsh i totally am NOT trying to find an excuse to be around him. i’ll prove it by making sure he knows we will be on opposite ends of the pool and i’m totally not interested in being around him!”

okay Keith, i think we get the point ;D (the way he says this line sounds so forced like he’s trying not to make things awkward oh my god)

if you go back and watch this scene, Keith looks over at Lance first. probably because he just realized he got stuck in an elevator, with his crush, while wearing bathing suits. the first thing running through his mind right now is probably “hHOL YSsHIT”

Lance looks over at Keith like “are you fucking kidding me right now” 

and Keith is like “shit gotta keep acting like this is the opposite of the best day of my life”

so anyways we cut back to this scene after a brief moment with Pidge and Hunk, and while i bet Keith would come up with any excuse to get close to Lance, i like to think it was Lance’s idea to crawl up the elevator shaft like this. he’s the kind of person who would come up with crazy ideas like this if he was that determined to get to the pool. i have absolutely no doubt Keith was internally screaming the whole time.

he proceeds to bicker with Lance like usual and they shove each other. if you look closely after Keith shoves Lance back though, you’ll notice he keeps leaning against Lance more than before. probably ‘cause he’s secretly enjoying the physical contact

lmao

poor Lance, he just wants to go swimming. let the dolphin boy swim

Keith: this is literally one of the best things that has ever happened to me don’t ruin it

Keith spots the vent shaft and they finally get out of there

listen, i don’t know if it was just intentional but it seriously looks like these two aren’t looking in the same direction. Lance is looking up at the vent shaft like “finally, thank god” whereas Keith looks like he’s just staring at nothing in particular, probably thinking to himself “well this was exciting but now we get to go swimming which is gonna be even better. nice”

tl;dr: Keith found out Lance was going swimming so he wanted to as well but pretended like it was just a coincidence, and totally was secretly enjoying the fact that he got trapped in an elevator with his crush. and based on all the pining!Keith evidence we have so far, i don’t see why this can’t be the case.

poems i would write you | shawn mendes

word count: 9,018 (i was gonna split this up, but decided to just keep it together. it’s long. put on your favorite sweatpants and grab that bag of hot cheetos you’ve been saving before you dig into this thing.)

author’s note: GUESS WHO’S BACK, BACK AGAIN? BERRY’S BACK, TELL A FRIEND. welcome to the first installment of my college!shawn series, which takes place during Y/N’s (that’s you) freshman year. it’s got fluff, angst, and some pretty stupid decisions on everyone’s part. title from “shot down” by khalid, as per a recommendation from @light-up-shawn. enjoy.


Your name: submit What is this?

i.

Upon your arrival to college, you had been on the receiving end of entirely too much advice from various relatives, older friends, and even strangers. Don’t walk alone at night, don’t sign up for eight AM classes, don’t drink the “jungle juice” at any frat parties.

Your parents had told you to focus on your studies and seek tutoring help if you needed it. Your sister had encouraged you to join a sorority to really be at “the heart” of university life, as if you knew what that meant. The only advice your cousin gave you was to always remember your room key and to pack a pair of shower shoes, the latter of which she accompanied with a shudder - you could piece together that anecdote on your own.

But nobody had prepared you for this particular problem.

Keep reading

”How do you know when to recast your fishing rod?  How often should you do it?” I asked, still looking out into the lake, my mind concentrated on sensing any tremor in my hands. 

“Recast when you aren’t catching anything,” she replied, so sure of herself that I thought, at least for a second, that her answer made perfect sense.

It was that time of year when you welcomed the sun’s warmth.  Winter was a month or two away, and finally the noon sun’s rays weren’t overwhelming.   Most of the leaves had just begun to orangafy, and according to Alexis, this was the best time of the year to fish. 

So there we were, both sitting on the lake’s shore in two foldable lawn chairs, our shoes pressed into the dark, silted mud, our eyes steadfastly gazing into the lake as if our lives depended on it.

“Do you want to go eat after this?  Maybe get some Long John Silvers?” I joked.

“Yeah, that sounds good,” she answered, apparently unaware of my pitiful attempt at humor.

“Haha I was joking, you see–”

A fish hit the side of my face, its scales lightly abrading the side of my cheek.  She was aware.  Still, though, I didn’t think my joke warranted a fish attack.

“You can’t just throw a fish at me whenever you don’t like my jokes,” I said, taking my eyes off the lake and onto her nice-looking face.

“I just did.”

Well, she had me there.  I wish I had a fish to throw back at her, but I hadn’t caught any.  Sure, I could throw the one she threw at me back at her, but I felt like I should have to earn my own fish ammo. 

“And don’t throw that back at me,” she said, “I just got a pedicure.”

“What does that have to do with anything?!”

“I don’t want fish on me.”

“You’re wearing sandals, though.  Your feet are literally in the mud right now.”

“Mud’s good for your feet.  It’s a natural exfoliator.”

“Then why’d you get the pedicure?”  

“I had a coupon,” she said as her hand began to furiously reel in her line.  She had caught another fish, a trout, it looked like, and a big one too. 

A dog’s bark could be heard in the distance.  A distant flock of swans flew over the horizon.  A brisk wind swirled in my ears.  It was the fall of 2009, the height of the Great Recession, and I was hopelessly, madly in love.

anonymous asked:

How jumin and seven would react if MC turned into a cat for a day? 😻

Umm ok sure heh^^;; hope you like~

[Jumin+Saeyoung]

  • Jumin is more than a little freaked out 
  • But something about this cat…he just knows its MC 
  • He hadn’t even told anyone about what had happened when he got a message from Saeyoung 
    • “You got a new cat?!! I’m coming over!” 
  • Before he knew it, the doorbell was ringing 
  • He bee-lines it right for you and you try to run away but he’s scooping you up 
    • “She’s so cuuuute!”
    • “Hands off,” Jumin snatches you away from Saeyoung 
  • Saeyoung pouted 
    • “I don’t believe I gave you permission to come here,” Jumin scoffed 
    • “I saw her on your security cameras and couldn’t help myself! Come here, girl,” he pulled a toy from his pocket and dangled it in front of you 
  • Jumin glared in annoyance 
    • “She’s not going to want to-”
  • Suddenly you jumped out of his arms and ran to the toy to bat at it with your paw 
  • Saeyoung looked super pleased with himself 
    • “What was that, Jumin?” he said smugly
    • “Ugh, MC…” he caught himself a little too late 
    • “You named her…after MC? That’s a little weird, even for you Jumin. Does she know about this?” he laughed 
  • Jumin actually smiled a bit seeing you play with the toy
  • Until Saeyoung began petting you 
  • First it was your face 
  • Then he moved down to scratch at the base of your tail and he heard you purr as you rubbed your face on his leg 
    • “Alright, that’s enough!” 
  • He hadn’t meant to shout, and he cleared his throat in embarrassment as his cheeks flushed
  • He picked you up from the ground gingerly 
    • “I was about to eat dinner, so I’ll be asking you to leave now,” Jumin pushed him back towards the door 
    • “Ughhh, stingy…Alright. But I’m coming back! You didn’t even let me say goodbye to Ell-”
  • Jumin slammed the door in his face 
    • “Are you hungry?” 
  • He held you up to his face and your noses touched 
  • After some thought he had some Tuna prepared for you 
  • And a bowl of milk 
    • “Don’t lap so fast. It isn’t very ladylike, watch Elizabeth 3rd.”
  • He could tell you were glaring, even as a cat 
    • “You’re still cute, though,” he stroked your fur with a smile 
  • When it came time for bed all three of you snuggled in under the covers 
  • He let you sleep on his chest 
  • Your small breaths helped ease his anxieties and the thoughts of how to get you back to the way you were 
  • Your little face was nuzzled into the crook of his neck and the vibrations of your purrs put him to sleep 
  • He woke up to find your body back to normal, most of you laying directly on top of him 
  • He sighed in relief and ran his fingers through your hair 
    • “Welcome back…” he whispered when your eyes began to flutter open 
    • “Jumin…” you yawned, “should I start breakfast?” 
    • “No…let’s lay here a while longer, kitten,” he smiled and kissed you 
Day Two: Failure/Insecurity

Day two of @vldangstweek. I decided to focus on the insecurity bit of this day. I’m really happy with the positive feedback on day one, thanks everyone! Under a cut for length. 


“Keith? You okay? You seemed a little…off…during that workout.”

“I’m fine, Hunk. Thanks for asking. I’ll be out to dinner in a second.”

There was a long pause, and Keith waited with baited breath until he heard the sound of Hunk’s footsteps moving down the hallway towards the dining hall. He sighed with relief and gingerly peeled off his jacket, fingerless gloves coming off after it. With a deep breath, he lifted his shirt up and over his head, the fabric drenched in sweat from training, and tossed it into the laundry chute.

When Keith turned back to the mirror, he couldn’t help but flinch. He lifted a hand and ran it over the skin of his stomach, over the faint lilac color that had been steadily stretching outwards ever since his encounter with The Blade of Marmora. It covered nearly his entire torso at this point, dipping just below the waistband of his jeans and curling up around his collar bone, over his biceps. He knew he wouldn’t be able to hide it for much longer, but keeping it covered, keeping it hidden from the others….

It made him feel less like a villain, less like a failure as a teammate, because since he was Galra, he was partially to blame for the death of Coran and Allura’s planet, partially to blame for Shiro’s disappearance, for everything.

He swallowed and dragged a hand through his hair, watching as the strands glistened a deep purple color in the light of the bathroom. That was the hardest to hide, but luckily for him, it seemed to be staying a darker shade rather than becoming the pale lavender he had grown so used to seeing on the Galra. It blended in with his hair, except in certain lighting, so for the most part it wasn’t visible.

Keith sighed and hunched over the sink, taking a shaky breath and turning the tap on. He splashed a bit of cold water into his face, letting it drip down over his chin and down his neck, the coldness replenishing his energy and making it easier for him to relax about this whole damn predicament.

A knocking at the door. “One sec, Hunk.”

“It’s not Hunk. Dude, you okay?”

Keep reading

[lmaooooo so i stumbled across this blog two days ago and immediately fell in love. I may have accidentally contradicted established canon in here b/c i haven’t read everything and i really wanted to join in, so i really hope i’m doing this right.]

——

You think it was, perhaps, a bad idea to name yourself after your characters. You think it was, in fact, a bad idea to go to Elsewhere at all. It wasn’t even the university you wanted to go to; you had wanted somewhere close to home, where you could maybe visit on weekends and call up your mom whenever you managed to fail at doing adult things like laundry, as you knew would inevitably happen.

And yet…when you found Elsewhere University, it was in your state. It was not thirty minutes’ drive from home. And it was intriguing. You still probably wouldn’t have gone, would have chosen the college you’d been dead-set on for two years, would have slipped the net and been normal

Except you saw one of Them. You saw a flash out of the corner of your eye, and you didn’t know the rules, so you spun to do a doubletake, and you saw it, saw Them.

You aren’t sure what happened after that–it gets a bit blurry–but the next thing you knew you were sitting at orientation, your things already in a dorm guarded by salt and an iron horseshoe.

You have been told you’re one of the lucky ones.

You major in animation. Or you had wanted to. The memories of your classes don’t stay in your mind all that well, but you manage to churn out the same A-to-B grades you had produced in high school. You aren’t sure how you’re doing it.

You try to follow the rules. You try to remember. You have seen the consequences. For once, instead of trying to stuff everything into your head and hoping your shit brain won’t forget something, you write them down in a notebook that never leaves your backpack.

This is probably a bad idea. It may even be a disastrous one, but if it is, you haven’t heard the rule that warns away from it, and you are scared enough as it is that you, with your autism, might miss a social cue or be unable to pick up an unspoken rule and end up offending the Gentry anyways.

You once read a tumblr post that said changlings were the explanation people came up with to explain kids with autism in the far distant past. Obviously, this is not completely true, because the Fair Folk are real and real changlings are too, but you take some measure of comfort in that post and pray your own autism will endear you to the Gentry instead of offending Them.

But the real problem is, you became an animator (or wanted to, at least) because you are a creator. You invent things, weave worlds, and when you came to Elsewhere University you came already carrying a large, elaborate tapestry of a world, filled with magic and a fey that had its own internal systems, thought out, explained in depth, and with the sketches and maps to go with it, formed over four, five years of loving care and writing and drawing.

You have your own magic, and your own fey, and they do not mesh well (they barely mesh at all) with that of Elsewhere. Nobody knows about this, and you have put your world to the side, because everything in you screams DANGER at having something like this around the Gentry. You keep all you have of it in your closet, and you salt the edges of the closet plus a circle around the bag you keep it in, then scatter iron nails inside the circle. That world is precious to you, and you will take no chances with it.

So it was probably a stupid idea to name yourself after one of the characters in it.

That isn’t even the only problem, or necessarily the true problem. The true problem is you put yourself into the characters you create, and this makes that name almost as dangerous as a True Name after you get used to it.

You didn’t realize this until you looked into the mirror, and your hair was several shades lighter than it should be. You were able to puzzle out the problem, fortunately, and in a spasm of panic you switched your alias to a different character before it got too far and you became your character.

Except, because you’re a moron, you switched it to a character just as close to you.

This carried on for a while, and your eyes got bluer, and then your skin got darker, and then you got taller, until finally, in desperation, you ran a name generator until you found something with no association to your characters, but still felt nice as a name. Not too nice, of course.

By then, though, you didn’t look much like yourself anymore. You curse your idiocy, but the only way you can think of getting your original appearance back is to use your real name, or else the name you used on the internet. You aren’t that stupid. And it’s nice, sometimes, the way you look now.

You really, really hope the name you generated doesn’t end up being a True Name for this other you.

You are learning the true dangers of being a writer, artist, creator, in Elsewhere University. You are far too close to your stories. And if you write yourself into them, you worry that story will become Truth.

The Gentry are like that, you’re fairly certain.

So you watch your words and make sure your characters don’t resemble anybody (or anything) too closely when you sketch them idly in class, and when you write, you do it inside a circle of salt. It isn’t exactly comfortable, but you need your words, your art, your stories.

You do not know if you are doing this right.

You really, really, really hope you are.

 [x]

Omg. Fucking stop saying Fleury deserves this. I'm all for playing Murray if it's what is best for the team, but that doesn't mean Fleury is shit or deserves this treatment. I'm not defending Fleury's feelings. I'm defending a fucking great goalie who has been treated like absolute shit every since Sullivan took over. Sullivan has showed so much favoritism toward Murray ever since he took over. Again, I am all for playing the goalie that’s going to win you the cup, but so far? That goalie has been Fleury. Forget his save percentage (which was fantastic until the game when he was pulled), Fleury is the only reason why the Pens are still in the playoffs. He stood on his head EVERY. SINGLE. GAME. dragging the rest of the team kicking and screaming. And then after doing that for 14 FUCKING GAMES he has one bad game and his season and time with the Penguins is over. Those of you defending Sullivan for this decision ... I don’t think you have ever played goalie. Or if you have, I don’t know how you can sit there and say that Fleury doesn’t deserve to play. Playing goaltender in hockey is literally one of the hardest positions in all of sports to play, and goalies are the last line of defense, not the first. Fleury had absolutely no help from the defense the game he was pulled, but somehow it’s his fault, right? I just don’t think some of you understand how mentally and physically exhausting playing this position is and then when you see your hard work that has gotten the team this far being punished?? That sure as hell does not help. So before you start blinding defending Murray because he is the future of this franchise, why don’t you look at who actually got us this far into the playoffs. What does Fleury have to do to prove he is a fantastic goaltender to you guys (as if being a franchise starting goalie for 11 or 12 seasons isn’t enough?)??? Have 16 shutouts in a row and score every single goal scored in the playoffs? Damn.

anonymous asked:

RFA+V and Saeran finding out that MC is really protective of their s/o and having to hold them back from trying to beating up someone who talked crap about them. I'm not sorry MC will fite anyone. Even themselves. I will go down with this headcanon

Zen

  • Ok, he’s supposed to be the one getting pissed when his director gives him shit???
  • Yet here he is, holding MC back, trying to shut her up so that she doesn’t make things worse for him.
  • “Okay, okay, okay, I’ll apologize, just let me go.”
  • “Sir, you’re lucky to have Zen as part of your cast for this musical. It’s a wonderful production, but I would advise you to treat all of your actors with more respect before it causes a problem.
  • When she turns back around to see the disappointed look on Zen’s face, that’s when she remembers she was supposed to apologize.
  • “Oh yeah, and I’m sorry I tried to punch your face. I hope it helped get my point across, though.”

Yoosung

  • “He called you a what?!?!”
  • “Oh god, MC, please don’t start anything…..!”
  • “No, I’m gonna go give this guy a piece of my mind!!! That’s bullying! God, I hate bullies!”
  • She literally drags Yoosung out of the car and forces him to show her where this asshole might be.
  • “Oh look, the annoying kid’s girlfriend is trying to come to his rescue! What a bunch of freaks! If you have a problem with me, handle it yourself, you fa-”
  • MC’s fist landed hard on his jaw, then she pushed him up against the wall. She’s yelling about respecting others and “people who only have shit to say should keep their goddamn mouths closed!” and Yoosung is freaking out.
  • Yoosung grabs her by the shirt and literally drags her away.
  • “Be assholes to ANYONE again, I dare you! There’s enough of my fist to go around, fellas!”
  • Nobody ever bothered Yoosung again.


Jaehee

  • Okay, all they wanted to do was run to the convenience store for some lunch. The past week, they’d only been able to spend time together at night, assuming that MC wasn’t already asleep by the time Jaehee got home.
  • THEY JUST WANTED TO SPEND TIME TOGETHER
  • According to Jumin, the report that Jaehee had submitted to him earlier in the day was “trash” and she’d have to use her lunch break to fix her mistakes.
  • “MC, you know how Mr. Han is. We can have lunch tomorrow.”
  • “Oh, yeah.. That sound’s good, Jaehee.”
  • …….
  • “You realize that Jaehee is the hardest worker that you’ve ever come into contact with, right?!? Having her work for you is more than you could ever ask for and sure as hell more than you deserve!!!”
  • When Jaehee heard the commotion and ran out, Jumin was pushed up against a wall with the front of his shirt balled up in MC’s fist.
  • Jaehee just sort of picked MC up and ran off with her before any of them got any angrier.


Jumin

  • “Yeah, I did an interview with him a few weeks ago about C&R’s possible cat hotel line, and the guy was awful! Jumin Han is one of the most arrogant bastards I’ve met, and that’s coming from someone who does celebrity interviews for a living.”
  • OHHHHHHH NO HE DID NOT SAY THAT 
  • MC called up A! Celebrity News in a rage, requested she get an interview, and damn it, she was not hanging up until she got one.
  • Jumin came with her to the interview. Before they went on the air, MC had a small amount of time to talk to the interviewer.
  • “Actually, I’m not interested in an interview. I only wanted to confront you concerning what you said about my husband earlier this week.”
  • When MC lunged at him, Jumin grabbed around her middle and told her that he doesn’t care about what some shitty news program has to say about him, so neither should she.
  • Jumin literally carried her outside and threw her into the car to avoid being sued.


707

  • He took MC to an amusement park, and they’d been playing games for hours. 
  • The guy at the dunk tank was insulting everyone who walked by, calling them “scrawny,” or “weak,” or even shouting “Hey ugly!” at some of them.
  • When he shouted “Hey, little frilly thing in the pink! Think your frail little arms can take me down?” at MC, she was sucked in.
  • She got three goes at it, and every time she missed, the dunkee laughed.
  • “Oh, why don’t you give the boy a try? He’s obviously been working out, what with the juggling and everything! God, the clowns really do get more breaks than us!” He started touching his hair, implying that it was Seven’s red hair that ‘gave him away.’
  • MC’s last ball missed, making her sigh and the man in the tank laugh. “Hey, Maybe you should be getting back to your posse! I think I saw balloon animals and red hair go that way!”
  • MC WAS NO LONGER DRY AND THEY’RE BOTH NO LONGER WELCOME AT THE AMUSEMENT PARK.


V

  • MC wasn’t really paying attention, and V literally didn’t see where he was going. 
  • When V bumped into a guy with two waters in his hands, he immediately apologized.
  • “Fucking idiot, watch where you’re going. You fuckin’ blind of something?”
  • None of the water had even spilled?? Why the hell was he so angry?????
  • And he picked on something that V couldn’t control???? oh no.
  • MC took both of the waters from him, dumped them both on top of his head, then threw the cups at his face.
  • V grabbed around MC’s waist, picked her up, and started walking in the opposite direction.
  • “Darling, I don’t know where we’re going, but we’re going somewhere to calm down.”


Saeran

  • If someone so much as thinks something bad about Saeran, MC is going to kick ass.
  • Saeran waits for her to do some damage before he actually tries to help. 
  • Fights are exciting and she usually wins anyways. What do you want from him????
  • They’re banned from quite a few places because one of them ends up fighting someone almost every time they leave the house.

Dave slammed his hands to the table on the meteor.  “We are gathered here today to discuss an issue of grave fuckin’ importance.”

Rose nodded, sitting across from him.  

Dave indicated toward his only prepared slide, which consisted of a cropped picture of the top of Karkat and Kanaya’s heads. “The ultimate question, Rose, that we, the humans, have been called to answer:  Troll horns: Why are they so hot?”

“It’s a problem that has plagued fantasy writers since fantasy began,” Rose said sagely.  “And yet, when I find myself face to face with the conundrum, I can only say: ‘Nice’.”

Dave brought his hand to his chin as he paced and pondered around.  “They look like candy corn.  Candy corn has not, traditionally, been the spankenest of Halloween candy.  What exactly is the magic combination here?”

Rose shrugged dramatically. “I can’t describe it. There are times, when it’s dark, that Kanaya’s glow will light on her horns, which highlight her head in a way that is just… mesmerizing.”

“Yeah, sometimes when he gets clingy, Karkat will rub will his little nubs on my shoulder and just kinda rest there.”

“When she holds me close, she lets me run my nails down her horns, and it makes the most wonderful little sound.”

“Last time we watched a movie, he sat there in front of me, so I put my hands right on ‘em ‘cause they’re the perfect size for it, and he just kinda hummed.”

“She’ll tilt her head to smile and her horns will tilt too.”

“He’ll raise his eyebrows when he’s shocked and they’ll line right up with his horns.”

“Her beautiful face-“ “His adorable face-“ –cute eyes glimmering-“ “-love to listen to him-“ “-laughs like a goddess-“ “-has the cutest smile-“

Rose and Dave continued to gush for about a minute before they both trailed off and stared into space, smiling with their faces in their hands.

After a pause, Rose chuckled. “We sure got lucky, huh?”

Dave looked at his sister. “Yeah,” he said softly. “We really did.”


“Hey, Kanaya, why don’t humans have horns?”

“I don’t know, but I find it quite fetching.”

“Fuck yeah.”


completely self-indulgent fluff i wrote because i love rosemary and i love davekat and i love rose and dave loving their space sweethearts.  based partially off of @ayanak‘s headcanons about troll horns.