not my dream team

anonymous asked:

can we talk about my crush? we met at my schools women empowerment club, and whenever she talks i can’t help but smile.. it’s the first time i’ve ever had an actual crush on a girl (i’m a girl as well) and i just wanna rant and rave about her and how cute she is!! she has curly, short, auburn hair and green eyes. she’s on our quiz bowl team and is my dream girl but i’m too scared to talk to her :( ahhhg

talk to herrrr!! she’s sounds so adorable! You got this hun 💞💕💕

Hogwarts houses : what kind of friend they are

Gryffindor: protective friend - they’re the kind of friends who’ll make you laugh to counteract your tears, whilst swearing not to hurt the person who caused them. But 10 minutes later they’ll be ready to fight that person regardless,,,, oops

Ravenclaw: good advice friend - they’re usually awake until 3am reading, so they won’t mind late night rants. They’ll listen to everything you have to say and come up with the most logical and beneficial advice, without turning you against anyone or making you feel like you need to change unimportant parts of your life. Hates unnecessary drama. Educated n honest in everything they say.

Hufflepuff: vegetarian friend - they don’t mind you eating meat, it’s your choice, they just love animals too much to do it themselves. Plants are pretty cool anyways. Known make the most unique meals known to man, but holy shit they’re good. Will probably buy you flowers whenever you’re sad and take you on a walk to see their “friends”. Those “friends” are hippogriffs. Maybe occamys.

Slytherin: shady friend - they won’t hurt anyone, they don’t want to be seen as violent because they aren’t. BUT DAMN SON if you need to talk about your distant cousin Victoria, you know where to go. Lovely people. Just don’t cross them or their friends.

anonymous asked:

buck do you have plans for thanksgiving?

yeah, i have a plan. well, it’s technically more of a scheme, i guess. and you guys have to swear not to tell…anyone with common sense, really.

i’m gonna make a Trashcan Turkey. 

what is a Trashcan Turkey, you ask? let me enlighten you to possibly the most brilliant, terrible, wonderful bird-cooking method i have not yet tried. i’ve talked clint and johnny storm into helping me with this, it’s gonna be a disaster. 

(this is not to be confused with the Dumpster Bird incident, where sam and clint both wound up in the same dumpster, and then hulk thew the whole thing at an evil giant crab, not knowing they were inside. but don’t worry, they were fine. eventually.)

anyway, a Trashcan Turkey is exactly what it sounds like: a turkey cooked inside a trash can. you take a long, sturdy wooden stake and drive it into the ground (or better yet, take some rebar and weld a crossbeam so the turkey can’t slide down) and then cover the stake and the surrounding ground in tin foil. if you wanna catch the turkey drippings, you can put a bundt cake pan on the ground with the stake in the center. then you mount the turkey on the stake, all seasoned however you like. 

then you take a new–and that part’s key–NEW metal trash can and put it top-down over the turkey. 

and then you light a bunch of charcoal on fire. 

you heap the burning charcoal around the base of the trash can and put more burning charcoal on top. i’d recommend a shovel for that job, if you don’t have a fireproof metal hand or a really flammable inflammable dude to just grab them directly. thanks, johnny.

then you keep it all burning for awhile. i’ve been told that the formula is 1 hour for a 10 pound turkey, plus ten minutes per additional pound. 

when the time’s up, you remove the coals and the trash can. that part can be a little dangerous, because everything’s very hot, but again: fireproof friends/hands. 

you should have, at that point, a perfectly cooked Trashcan Turkey.

i’m sure why you can see why this is appealing to me. there’s fire, food, potential for disaster–it’s all the most important parts of life combined in one family holiday event.

there’s no way this goes well. 

it’s gonna be awesome.