not like it matters he's a ghost

It hurts

I have this idea for a little while. It is very sad, but I mean, I’m a writer, I need to write some sad stuff too. 

Warnings: Mentions of suicide, suicidal theme in the text

Tags: @fluffy-jack

Also, read the note at the end 

(the gif doesn’t fit in at all, but I couldn’t find anything more appropriate) 

Originally posted by crankgameplaysreactions

The first week after the incident, Ethan was in shock and denial. It felt like there was a barrier of fog in front of him, and there was no way out. Everything felt untouchable, as if he didn’t really exist. No matter what Mark, Amy, Kathryn, or Tyler tried; no one could reach him. He acted like a ghost, floating around. He was neither awake nor asleep. He just… was.

The second week after the incident, the fog seemed to lift. He was more responsive, but he still seemed shut off. More than not he was lost in thought, and he seemed apathetic to everyone around him. When Mark managed to cut his hand badly, Ethan didn’t even help. He just played his videogame, muttering “bummer” under his breath when Mark told him. It’s not like he meant to be so cold, but everything still seemed unreal. He built up walls of glass around him, muffling the noise. He didn’t want to feel, or think. He didn’t want people to worry, but a wall of glass is still see-through.  

The fifth week after the incident, the glass walls seemed to get thinner. Ethan started doing more. He made more videos, exercised more, and he even cleaned the apartment thrice a week. He was still loud and energetic in his videos, but it wasn’t hard to see that the light in his eyes were gone. His fans told him to take some time off, but he couldn’t. The walls were getting thinner, and he had to keep himself distracted. He had to keep himself from feeling. He went out running with Mark, pushing himself harder than he had ever done. He didn’t even notice Mark’s concerned looks.

The seventh week after the incident, the walls broke. He was at Mark’s house, going to fix some breakfast, and suddenly it all came crashing down. The pain grabbed a tight hold of his chest, and he couldn’t keep himself standing. Everything he was holding tumbled to the ground, along with him. The sorrow and pain started choking him, and he tried to fight it off. He screamed so loudly he couldn’t hear himself, and darkness surrounded him. The regret and blame was knocking him down with death threatening punches, making his ears ring. He saw everything from the night. He saw her. The jump. The lifeless body. The way he tried to wake her, as if she was just asleep. He remembered how she smiled at him from the top of the building, how her eyes were filled with tears. Everything he said, everything he did, nothing worked. The way her hand felt so cold and lifeless in his. Screaming, he hit the tiles on the floor, wanting to forget that night.

“Ethan, Ethan, what are you doing?” Mark yelled as he looked into the kitchen. Ethan sat crumbled on the floor, sitting amongst shards of broken glass and spilled juice. His arms were bloody, but he kept hitting the floor, the fridge, anything. Tyler rushed to his side, and the two men lifted him up. Ethan yelled at them to let him go, but they held onto him, no matter how much he kicked and yelled. Amy and Kathryn stood and watched, Amy hugging Kathryn tightly at the sight of the scene. Tyler held Ethan close to his chest, his arms wrapped around him in a protective manner. Ethan grew weak, finding it hard to stand up. He stopped fighting, and slowly, everything became blurry. He felt dizzy and nauseous, and suddenly his legs disappeared beneath him. Darkness took over him as loud, muffled voices shouted his name.

~~~

“Hey.”

Ethan groaned.

“Ethan.”

He didn’t want to respond.

“Wake up.”

He opened his eyes and saw Amy smiling softly at him. Lifting his arms, he was going to rub the sleep out of his eyes, but he noticed the bandages over his hands. The memories came flooding back, and he had to shut his eyes tight, trying to block out the images of the lifeless body. Amy stroked him on the arm, but he swatted the hand away. She pulled up a little tray with food on it, placing it on Ethan’s lap. He looked at it confusedly, as if he had never seen food before.

“You’ve been asleep for about 36 hours… We thought we’d let you rest, but you need to eat.” Amy sat by the end of the bed, and Ethan looked blankly at her. “Thanks, but no thanks. I’m not hungry.” He looked away from the food, and a picture caught his eye. It was of him and his girl… ex- girlfriend, merely three weeks before the incident. She looked so happy. He hurriedly faced the picture down, and looked back at Amy. There was no pity in her eyes, but they were warm and filled with love.

“Ethan… We know you’re hurting. Everyone knows, even your fans. You’ve been in shock, alright, but you’ve also built up walls around you. We’re here for you. Her death affected all of us, and you most of all. Let us help,” Amy reached for his hand, but Ethan didn’t grab it. Chuckling, he put away the tray and stood up. He laughed loudly, worrying Amy. His eyes were blank and filled with tears, and still laughing, his voice started breaking.

“Amy, this is my fault. Everything of this is my fault-”

“This isn’t your fault. Nobody knew-”

“I should have known!” He pointed at himself, his voice booming and his body shaking. “I should have known, okay? I was her boyfriend. I was supposed to protect her, keep her happy. I was supposed to be there for her. But I didn’t know. I didn’t know, I wasn’t there and now she’s dead.” His voice was trembling with every word, tears spilling down his cheeks.

“You weren’t there. You weren’t there that night, but I was. I should have stopped her! I should have talked her out of it; it was my responsibility! What am I worth if I can’t stop someone from feeling like their life is worthless? What if any of you guys start feeling suicidal, and I’m not able to be there for you?” He stopped for a moment, trying to collect himself. “I saw her. I saw her the moment she went from alive to dead. And it hurts. The images haunt my mind and whenever I close my eyes, I see her lying there. Dead. I can’t help but feel like this is my fault. I should have known. I should have done… something. Anything. Instead, I’m alive, and she’s dead.”

Slowly, Amy stood up. She walked up to Ethan, and hugged him tightly. He let all his emotions spill, and cried into her shoulder. The knot in his chest loosened, and it felt a little easier to breathe. After a little while, he stood up straight, and Amy smiled at him. She dried his tears, and fixed his hair a little bit.

“Even if you don’t believe me right now, it was not your fault. In the end, it was her choice. You cannot keep blaming yourself. It is very hard. I understand that. I’m not going to say that your feelings will disappear overnight, or that you will be happy the next week. What I can say though, is that we’re here for you. We’re here if you need to cry, talk, or get your mind on something else. We will support you through the night and guide you to the day. You just have to be willing, okay? We love you Ethan,” she squeezed his hands gently, and he hugged her tightly thankful for his friend.

“I love you too, Amy.”

And things weren’t all right. He was definitely not all right.

But that day, a little bit of darkness disappeared in Ethan.

And that was a start.

So a lot of you might be wondering why I chose to write something like this. No, I don’t sit fantasizing about Ethan having a girlfriend, and her killing herself. There isn’t really any huge reason why this is a fanfic at all, I just like using youtubers for my characters. 

Anyway, many people blame themselves after incidents like these. I remember that my friend called me in the middle of the night,and I didn’t answer. He cut himself, and I blamed myself a lot after that. If only I hadn’t been asleep. If only I hadn’t had my phone on mute. 

Still, it was not my fault. And it is not your fault. 

You hear me?

It is not your fault. 

Still, be there for each other. Care for one another. If anyone need to talk about things that relate to this, just message me. 

And remember, it gets better. Even if it doesn’t seem like it will. 

OMGCP is canonically magic in subtle ways.  

Sure, there are the ghosts, and Johnson breaks the fourth wall.  No one questions those (except Ransom, who holds firm to ghosts not being real).

But there are other, small pieces of magic tucked in.  The quarter that stops perfectly in the crack in the floorboards.  The pies that always come out just the way Bitty wants them to no matter how much time he has in the Haus kitchen.  And unless something is wrong, unless the mood is disturbed, Bitty never drops one of them.  The way leaves always cling to Nursey, like he’s static charged, or like the wind and the earth are drawn to him.  The way the Haus’ roof always seems to hold exactly as much weight as it needs to, even when it shouldn’t be structurally sound enough to hold the weight of four or five hockey boys and their much smaller manager.  A little bit of love in the jam that makes Jack warm and happy and calm when he’s going through his pre-game ritual, a feeling he notices most when it was jam he got from Bitty.

There are things that none of them understand but that they accept, because everyday magic is more literal than figurative at Samwell.

Periods Aren’t That Bad. They’re Actually A Whole Lot Worse: A Lesson For Non-Period-Havers

Disclaimer 1: This will probably get a little NSFW.

Disclaimer 2: Symptoms of periods vary from period-haver to period-haver. It pretty much sucks for everyone, though.

Disclaimer 3: I have a high pain tolerance. Really high. If I say something is really painful, it is really fucking painful.

And now for the reasons why having periods suck and it’s worse for us to have it than for you to hear about it:

  1. There is blood coming from our vaginas. This is a very unpleasant feeling. We cannot “hold it.” Some people get a light trickling. Some, like me, get a Goddamn crime scene.
  2. The ways to keep from bleeding all over everything include a pad, which basically feels like a diaper, and a tampon, which is basically shoving a cotton pipe up there, is not as much fun as it sounds, and can be very uncomfortable if done wrong. And doing it right is fairly hard. Thanks to good old Catholic sex ed, it took me about five years to figure out.
  3. Cramps. I am lucky in that my cramps tend not to be THAT bad (thank you, high pain tolerance), but some get cramps so bad that the pain is comparable to appendicitis.
  4. Headaches. What I lack in cramps, I often make up for in headaches. And not just any headaches. Agonizing headaches. They can start up to a week before the bleeding starts, they last a few days into it, and they don’t go away. No matter how much aspirin you take. Seriously, when I get menstrual headaches, I could down an entire fucking bottle of Advil and I’d probably die but my ghost would still have the headache.
  5. Acne. I’m talking looking like Deadpool under the mask.
  6. Indigestion. It isn’t fun.
  7. Bloating.
  8. Sometimes my actual vaginal region hurts. A lot. Enough to have me doubled over on the floor.
  9. For some reason my anxiety gets worse sometimes around my period. Which is extra fun. There’s nothing like nearly calling the morgue because your dad was late from a basketball game, only to find out he was at Applebee’s.
  10. Fatigue. Because I’m doing everything I normally do while my body is staging a mutiny.
  11. Backache.
  12. Just generally feeling disgusting.
  13. This goes on for a week.
  14. This happens every Goddamn month.
  15. This generally starts around age twelve or so and lasts until maybe age 45.
2

“You’ve left me paralyzed.
And now I’m stuck,
You’ve got me stuck.
Hmmm—uh
I never knew
Just what I wanted.
I still don’t know,
it’s all missing.
You’re picking up
On what I started.”

-

(I guess it’s safe to say my Ghost!Arthur deserved a new design… yet again! First image is like a cover, with him standing with his Electro Beats and the name of the song I picked for him. Second image is a ref thingy and is numbered- you can check all details under ‘read more’!)

(Here is the image with his last designs! You can learn something about him there as well if you want to see it!)

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notes on sylvia plath's copy of hamlet from her undergrad years

-wrote intellectual next to “horatio says ’‘tis but our fantasy”
-wrote architectural balance next to claudius’ first speech
-“how is it that the clouds still hang on you”: wrote ambiguous over “clouds”
-underlined “unmanly grief”
-underlined “you speak like a green girl / unsifted in such perilous circumstance”
-underlined everything from “so often it chances in particular men…from that particular fault” and wrote tragic flaw
-underlined ophelia’s entire “my lord as I was sewing in my closet” speech
-wrote growth of madness next to “fell into a sadness”; old age & decay next to “old men have grey beards”; and death-wish next to “except my life”
-wrote world a prison next to “denmark’s a prison”
-wrote depressive above what a piece of work is man speech
-underlined polonius’ “ecstasy of love” and “still on my daughter”
-wrote decay next to “fatted all the region kites with this slaves offal”
-wrote uncertain of nature of the ghost next to “my weakness and my melancholy”
-underlined all of to be or not to be
-next to “why wouldst thou be a breeder of sinners” she wrote all is corruption
-next to “marry this is miching mallecho it means mischief” she wrote furious
-she underlined “I’ll take the ghosts word for a thousand pound” and wrote wretched like spies, popinjays
-she underlines every instance of the word “revenge”
-underlined “mother mother mother”
-wrote stichomythia on “now mother what’s the matter”
-ophelia’s mad scene: she underlined “lord we know what we are but know not what we may be,” “quoth she” song, “come my coach…good night,” rosemary, pansies, violets, wrote references to her father next to “and will he not come again”
-underlined everything from “there is a willow” through “our cold maids do dead men’s fingers call them”
-seems generally to underline lines abt corpses and decay
-underlined “there is no ancient gentleman but gardeners, ditchers and gravemakers; they hold up adam’s profession” and above it she wrote “when adam delved and eve span / who was then the gentleman?”
-underlined and starred “absent thee from felicity a while and in this harsh world draw thy breath in pain to tell my story”

anonymous asked:

i still have doubts about whether will is actually in love with hannibal ;(

Well nonny you have come to the right place. Because I have no such doubts. I am overwhelmed on a daily basis by just how much Will Graham loves Hannibal Lecter. It’s late and I’m exhausted and I really should be doing this during daylight hours, so please excuse the rambling and caps lock and incoherence. Also, I’m putting most of this below a cut because I have no chill and it’s way too long and gif-heavy for me to inflict upon unsuspecting dashes.

Anyway, come with me nonny on a magical journey back to mid-season 2. Will is all fresh outta prison with his sassy brows and slick new haircut and he is just dead set on Reckoning. He is going to catch that mother fucker and it is going to be GLORIOUS.

There’s only one problem

Will can’t actually bring himself to hate Hannibal. 

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anonymous asked:

So SCrs have a post comparing 3x07 with 8x10 and saying that Elena made everything about her, about Stefan feeling anything or he'd lose her, but Caroline makes it about him regardless of their relationship... I know you didn't watch the episode, but what do you think?

I watched that scene and here is where context comes into play.

In 3x01 we learn that Elena has been searching for Stefan all summer, like literally for two or three months basically all she’s been doing is chasing leads.

and she’s been fighting everyone about searching for him:

and in 3x02 she faces werewolves for him:

In 3x03 she hid in a murder closet while Klaus the Original Vampire who thinks she’s dead, is right outside so she can see Stefan and bring him home:

and then Stefan breaks up with her after all of that:

and then in 3x05 she is hit by Klaus:

she watches Stefan tear apart her classmates:

and she’s still there like:

telling him to fight and he just needs to want it bad enough and he’s compelled to bite her which puts her in the hospital:

but in 3x06 she’s right there like:

and then 3x07 comes around and before that moment that the SCers are comparing to 8x10, Elena spends the day learning from Lexi on how to get through to Stefan, it’s about her methods and the things you have to do to get him to feel again:

She watches him suffer, listens to him talk about how he wished her never met her and she just has to take it , like it’s exhausting being there and going through that while at the same time her brother is cheating on her best friend with a ghost, Klaus is trying to make hybrids, like the world is coming apart at the seams and she’s needed elsewhere so she goes where she’s needed and Stefan asks her if she’s giving up, the one person who has been his cheerleader, who has been relentless in getting him back, who has been there no matter how hard he’s tried to push her away:

and she says:

Like no, I’m still here, I’m still your cheerleader, I’m still stubborn and she also says:

which is fair because she’s done everything, she’s risked her life for him, she brought his dead best friend to help her get through to him, tortured him, pleaded with him, but he needs to want it too, which is a line very much about him as is this:

and this line:

is an appeal to his humanity which makes absolute sense because it has been established and re-established that his humanity is directly linked to Elena.

In 3x01, she’s the one he calls, not Damon, not Caroline, it’s Elena:

In 3x05 he freaks out when Klaus hits her:

he told her she was what kept him from giving up:

Klaus marvels at the love he has for her:

and he fights compulsion for her:

So why wouldn’t Elena appeal to his humanity by threatening to give up on him? After everything she’s done for him why wouldn’t she realize that she’s spent so much of her time and been consumed with getting him back?

When 8x10 rolls around, what has Caroline done for Stefan by that point? Nothing. She’s talked at him.

In 8x08 they haven’t even interacted, she hasn’t been searching for any plans or any methods to help him out of his deal.

In 8x09 she talks at Damon about Elena and dances with him then talks at Stefan then stakes Stefan and throws a ring at him.

In 8x10 she manages to get him chained up and talks at him some more:

She didn’t risk her life for him, she hasn’t spent months searching for him, she’s a vampire so she has eternity on her side while Elena was a human who was being hunted by original vampires, Caroline is just getting started when Elena was invested by the time 3x07 rolled around. They are in two very different places and frankly Elena and Caroline mean two very different things to Stefan. Give me 3x07 over 8x10 any day.

That Was Not Acting - Cody Christian imagine

Summary: Y/n is an actress, she stars as Theo’s beta on Teen Wolf and has been for the past 1 ½ years. Her character Rebecca is required to have a steamy make out session with Theo leading into other things. No one knows that both Y/n and Cody are actually in a serious relationship until now.

Warning: Steamy make out sesh,kinda fluff and suggested smut.

A/N: gif credit to their respected owners ps ignore the fact i used Scallison as a gif it was the closest to my imagination XD

Originally posted by asplittingoffrerard

MASTERLIST


The day started like any other I arrived on set at a quarter to 8 as I always did, as usual Shelley and Tyler were on set first. I parked my car,grabbed my phone and bag then made my way out locked the car and went on with my way.

“Hey Y/n,on time as usual” Tyler greeted “that’s my girl” Shelley embraced me sweetly “So whatcha wanna do till showtime?” I asked “I dunno how bout pull a prank?” Tyler smirked wickedly “yes totally” Shelley moved her hands like a wicked scientist “but who?” I wondered “well we’ve done Dylan,Sprayberry,Ryan,Victoria-” Tyler began but Shelley cut him off “Khylin,Michael, Ian,J.R,Melissa,Holland,Each other” I pondered “Cody..we haven’t done Cody” I smiled nervously “that’s so true” Tyler exclaimed “let’s get a move on it he gets here by before 9″ Shelley expressed.

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jimin as your roommate

a/n: this is a re-post from my other blog, but it’s edited it a bit just like the jungkook version. the gifs don’t belong to me, credits to the owner. 


meeting // moving in-

  • hmmm
  • i can see him being shy
  • but not too shy
  • he’d just walk around and you know follow you around
  • while smiling
  • it’d be awkard when you turned around and face him
  • “why’re you smiling?”
  • “i didn’t really thought my roommate would be this pretty”
  • “same for me, what’s your name?”
  • “jimin and you?”
  • “y/n and thank you, you don’t look bad yourself though”
  • “i know”
  • “of course”
  • the two of you would go out and get to know each other
  • because yall gonna live together from now on
  • “why did you decide to have a roommate?”
  • “because i didn’t wanted to be lonely and i wanted someone to eat with, not some ghost”
  • “wait??? there are ghosts in our house???”
  • “i don’t know, it’s just sometimes there are some sounds that are a bit strange”
  • “okay, stop, enough, i don’t want to hear anymore, i’m scared”
  • “no worries, we’re with two now and look ice cream!”
  • you and jimin ran as fast as you guys could to the ice cream truck
  • even though it was winter
  • when the both of you got ice cream
  • you guys went back home and expect him to like stick on you
  • because this little shit is scared af
  • you two would watch some kids movie
  • to get the thoughts of the ghost out of your heads
  • jimin would end up sleeping next to you
  • his head on your shoulder
  • before he fell asleep
  • he told you that you were one of the most funnest people he met
  • and that of course made you happy

Originally posted by jimiyoong

rules-

  • probs not barging in when one is undressing or some other thing
  • “what if there’s fire and you’re like naked”
  • “then you have to get out, it doesn’t matter to the others”
  • “promise, you’d not take a shower before you leave the house when it’s burning”
  • “i promise”
  • you two would also plan to have a party each friday
  • because it’s friday duh
  • but when yall tired
  • the party is just gonna be a skype call with all of your guys friends
  • and just imagine it
  • yall would have a challenge called who eats ramen the fastest
  • and in the end everyone would feel bad
  • “this basically means, making someone sick”
  • “i know right”
  • “we’re all lazy people”
  • “lazy is a sport you know”
  • “of course”
  • “hey jimin, are you still in for another challenge?”
  • “hey! we said no more”
  • “no a staring contest, that’s another challenge and it doesn’t make you feel sick”
  • “jimin vs y/n!”
  • of course
  • jimin won and there you were sad af
  • “jimin is the winner! and y/n’s punishment is to kiss jimin”
  • you’d give him a quick but cute kiss on his cheek making him feel
  • the happiest he ever felt in his life

Originally posted by lonastic

feelings for each other -

  • yes ! yas !
  • like i can imagine him falling for you when
  • he saw you for the first time
  • basically
  • love at first sight
  • he’d wait for a few months until you two were really close
  • to each other
  • of course he wouldn’t want to ruin your guys friendship
  • jimin would try wrapping his arm around you and see
  • if there’s any reaction
  • or search up on the internet how to know if someone likes you back
  • he’d eventually end up confessing to you but
  • if he gets rejected he’d be really ashamed of himself
  • and of course apologize to you
  • the second time he’d confess to you would be later in the year
  • and that’s when you said yes
  • making him so happy that he actually jumped around like a small child
  • “you like me? are you for real?? this feels like a dream”
  • “i do, i didn’t realized it back then”
  • i can see pulling you in a hug and thanking you for accepting his confession
  • it’s cute because he already had tears in his eyes
  • that’s how happy this smol cutie was
  • that night he also brought you to the han river park
  • your guys favorite place
  • and now also your place where you guys had your first date

Originally posted by parkejimins

share ______-

  • rooms ;)
  • his bed would just be on the other side of the room
  • and like
  • just imagine you waking up and
  • staring him
  • at how handsome he actually is
  • even though you didn’t fully opened your eyes yet
  • “wowwwwwww, my roommate looking good”
  • that’s what you accidently shouted
  • making jimin wake up from his beauty sleep
  • he’d be in shock because he thought it was just a dream
  • “wait, was that you??”
  • “uhh, what, no? that wasn’t me”
  • “it’s obvious”
  • “okay, okay, it was me but no really you really look handsome when you sleep”
  • “this isn’t some twilight movie y/n”
  • “but it’s the truth”
  • just imagine that
  • and your guys room would be full of pictures of the two of you
  • like
  • when you guys went to disneyland, the 1st year anniversary of living together
  • “our bedroom looks nice today!”
  • “yeah because i am in it”
  • you two would probs buy lots for your room
  • it’s not normal
  • because yall have too many frames, collection of cars and toys and etc.
  • jimin would even give out some of the toys to friends or his family

Originally posted by jimiyoong

cleaning-

  • i can see jimin waking up
  • and realizing the two of you had to clean up
  • after the mess you guys made the night before
  • “Y/NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN”
  • you would wake up and walk over to his room
  • to check why he was shouting your name so loud
  • “what is it, jimin? are you okay?”
  • “oh, hey. i’m fine. i just called you so we can clean up the house”
  • “okay then, i’m going back”
  • he’d run towards you and tell you to stay with him and clean up
  • “y/n, you stay here”
  • “bye bye”
  • you would run to your bedroom but
  • yeah there’s another door that goes to your room and jimin used that door to get in and 
  • tell you that you need to clean up or else he’d eat all the food in the fridge
  • “okay, i’ll clean up the mess we made yesterday”
  • “okay let’s do this!”
  • i can already see him making the plastic cups into the 
  • eiffel tower
  • “you were the one that said we need to clean up but”
  • “oh, oops”
  • there would also be food like every where in the kitchen
  • and you would try eating some left overs
  • but jimin stopped you from doing that since he thought you were gonna get sick
  • “why jimin?? that’s food as well”
  • “that’s gonna make you sick, roomy”
  • in the end 
  • you two would end up making a huge mess again

Originally posted by nnochu

lazy days-

  • okay okay
  • i can see the two of you being really hungry
  • and there’s like no food anymore
  • “we have to buy food, jimin”
  • “y/n, i wish i could but my legs ran away”
  • “i can still see them”
  • “the soul of my legs, y/n”
  • jimin decided to join you anyways to do the groceries
  • it would take forever for you guys to get there 
  • even though it’s just a few meters walking
  • “why are we actually walking so slow, jimin?”
  • “because we’re on slow motion mode”
  • he’d suddenly run while you were there walking like really slow
  • “JIMIN I DON’T WANT TO RUN”
  • “DO IT FOR ME Y/N!!”
  • jimin would run back to you and drag you with him
  • while he’s running like some crazy person
  • when the both of you arrived there
  • both of you were tired
  • “damn, i’m tired! also look there that’s the juice that astro used in their short drama!”
  • “ooh, interesting”
  • both of you would be talking about the minion juice 
  • the whole time and also about how the ramyun maker is in the shop
  • “it works in this store, luckily.”
  • “why do you try it? we’re not gonna use it anyways”
  • you and jimin would eventually end up eating there
  • in the end of the day, you guys went back home and just fell asleep on the ground
  • since both of you were exhausted by eating and talking

Originally posted by jitamin

Mor is selfless af meta

Because I made a little throwaway post a little while back but people still apparently don’t get the Mor is selfless as all hell. So I thought I would compile a long, rambling list of Reasons and Evidence as to why irreverence does not mean disregard and why taking care for and loving yourself does not mean selfishness.  

Right, so, apparently people still think Mor is selfish (w h y?) which I…obviously disagree with. I don’t think that she makes a habit of putting her own needs/wants above others’ (though if she did she would be entirely entitled to, given what she’s been through/the abuse she endured) I just think she stopped letting other people rule her. I think she stopped taking the opinions and wants of other people for her as gospel and acting only on them at the expense of herself and her own wants and agency She does what she loves and she does what she needs but that doesn’t mean she acts selfishly. It just means that what’s important to her and what she wants to do she now does.

But I don’t think she puts her needs above others. There’s a thoughts vs actions distinction here - she refuses to place any more validity or weight to the opinions of others over her own - her feelings and ideas are valid and she has the right to express them and act upon them. She lets herself make the choices that she wants to make. But actually I think the choices that she makes are often very selfless and she puts the people that matter to her above her own well-being and happiness and she actually does this repeatedly.

Variety of ‘Mor being subtly selfless’ examples and analysis to follow. 

“Don’t get me started on what you did to me Under the Mountain.”
Rhys went still.
As still as I’d ever seen him, as still as the death now beckoning in those eyes. Then his chest began to move, faster and faster.

Across the pillars towering behind him, I could have sworn the shadow of great wings spread.
He opened his mouth, leaning forward, and then stopped. Instantly, the shadows, the ragged breathing, the intensity were gone, the lazy grin returning. “We have company. We’ll discuss this later.”
“No, we won’t.” But quick, light footsteps sounded down the hall, and then she [Mor] appeared.

Right, listen, this scene flat out parallels Rhys’ rescue of Feyre at her wedding and I refuse to see it in any other light. Feyre suffers a panic attack, she flashes back to UtM, she needs help, she needs a way out, Rhys appears and does just that. Same thing happens here. Feyre (inadvertently) triggers a panic attack in Rhys, he flashes back to UtM, he needs help, he needs away out, Mor is there in a heartbeat. That’s as much as a coincidence as Rhys showing up exactly when Feyre needed him: ie it’s literally not a coincidence at all.  

Right, so, for context, this is the first time that Feyre is at the Night Court since…well everything. At this point in time the only people know who about his and Feyre’s history as well as the fact that Rhys and Feyre are mates are Mor and Rhys. This is because the first words out of Rhys’ mouth when he saw Mor again after fifty years were ‘she’s my mate’ and he then proceeded to tell her everything. So for three months the only people who’ve known what Rhys went through and what he’s dealing with due to his bond to Feyre are Mor and Rhys. That means the only person who’s been supporting Rhys through all of this is Mor.

So when it comes to it and Feyre is there and having witnessed the shoe-throwing, less than wonderful reaction Feyre had to Rhys the night before Mor makes sure she’s nearby the next day. She makes sure that she’s around and the second that Rhys gets out of his depth she’s there to balance things and smooth them over. Which she does in spite of Rhys’ grumbling.

“You could be attending your own duties,” he said testily. I clamped my lips tighter together. I’d never seen Rhys … irked.
[…]
“And as my only remaining relative,” Rhys went on, “Mor believes she is entitled to breeze in and out of my life as she sees fit.”
“So grumpy this morning,” Mor said, plopping two muffins onto her plate.

He huffs about it but there’s no doubt that Mor’s appearance was sorely needed and that she calms him down and grounds him. Mor also goes out of her way to welcome Feyre, to make her feel like she fits in at the Court, to be a friend to her, to help her, and to encourage her to give Rhys a chance.  

‘…Mor said, swirling her wine, her shoulders loosening as Azriel at last blinked, and seemed to shake off whatever memory had frozen him.

[…]

“A new bastard in the camp—and an untrained shadowsinger to boot. Not to mention he couldn’t even fly thanks to—”
Mor cut in lazily, “Stay on track, Cassian.”
Indeed, any warmth had vanished from Azriel’s face. But I quieted my own curiosity as Cassian again shrugged, not even bothering to take note of the silence that seemed to leak from the shadowsinger. Mor saw, though—even if Azriel didn’t bother to acknowledge her concerned stare, the hand that she kept looking at as if she’d touch, but thought better of it.

These both happen at the first dinner at the House of Wind. Once again Mor is monitoring things carefully and she intervenes - casually, lazily, thoughtlessly, as though she doesn’t even care/is barely noticing what she’s doing but she knows exactly what’s going on. She keeps very careful watch over Az throughout the dinner, reacting when he feels better, intervening when Cass started wandering into dangerous waters and showing such overt concern for Az that Feyre noticed it before she knew anything about either of them/their dynamic. And as with what we saw before with Rhys her actions aren’t rewarded with any kind of gratitude from the people she’s looking out for - but she does it anyway. 

Azriel just shook his head. “I’ll go. The Prison sentries know me—what I am.”
I wondered if the shadowsinger was usually the first to throw himself into danger. Mor’s fingers stilled on the stem of her wineglass, her eyes narrowing on Amren.

[…]

“Here we go,” Cassian grumbled. Mor gave Azriel a warning glare to tell him not to volunteer this time. The spymaster just gave her an incredulous look in return.

Azriel: *is first to volunteer to go into dangerous situations likely due to his own disregard for his personal safety and the way he prioritises others over himself* Mor: *reproves him for doing this because he does matter. twice.* Fandom: *oh but she’s so selfish, she doesn’t care about Az at all! She doesn’t show any regard for him/love towards him/anything at all until the very end of the book when he gets shot* Me: -_- A N Y W A Y. 

She stared and stared at the Book—as if it were a ghost, as if it were a miracle—and said, “It is the Leshon Hakodesh. The Holy Tongue.” Those quicksilver eyes shifted to Rhysand, and I realized she’d understood, too, why she’d gone.
Rhysand said, “I heard a legend that it was written in a tongue of mighty beings who feared the Cauldron’s power and made the Book to combat it. Mighty beings who were here … and then vanished. You are the only one who can uncode it.”
It was Mor who warned, “Don’t play those sorts of games, Rhysand.”

Oh look, it’s Mor watching out for Amren’s well-being as well as Rhys and Azriel’s. It’s almost as though….There’s a theme here. Shocking. Even though Amren is one of the most powerful beings in the world Mor still has her back and still looks out for her. It’s almost as though she deeply loves and cares for her little found family and wants to protect them, even from small things. Incredible. 

And just in case anyone was doubting (since this relationship falls under a lot of scrutiny from Mor’s side) she also puts herself out there for Cassian’s sake too :) 

 “Cassian helped Rhys get me out. Before either had the real rank to do so. For Rhys, getting caught would have been a mild punishment, perhaps a bit of social shunning. But Cassian … he risked everything to make sure I stayed out of that court. And he laughs about it, but he believes he’s a low-born bastard, not worthy of his rank or life here. He has no idea that he’s worth more than any other male I met in that court—and outside of it. Him and Azriel, that is.”

Against the popular fandom belief that Cass still feels guilty about what happened with the Incident and that Mor somehow encourages this/benefits from it in some way I give you this. Actual canon. Because the only response that Mor ever shows to Cassian’s part in her past is gratitude. She is grateful. She is grateful that he was kind and good and gave her a choice. She is grateful that he rescued her from her abusive situation. It’s been five hundred years and she is still grateful to him for risking himself to get her out of there. And she considers him to be worth more than any other male she’s ever met aside from Rhys. 

Mor, on her knees beside Cassian, hurtled for the king with a cry of pure wrath.
He sent a punch of power to her. She dodged, a knife angled in her hand, and—
Azriel cried out in pain.
She froze. Stopped a foot from the throne. Her knife clattered to the floor.

 To be entirely clear about what happens here, okay: the king shreds Cassian’s wings with half thought and Mor, with absolutely no magic, with nothing to defend herself, with no ability to protect herself and with nothing but a single, solitary knife in her hand against a centuries old king strong enough to strip the magic from the two most powerful Illyrian warriors in history, the most powerful High Lord in history, and Feyre who has the power of all seven high lords in her veins at the same time launches herself at the king to punish him for what he’s done to her friend. And the only reason that she stops her attack is not because of the magic he tries to hit her with - but Azriel, because if she’d hurt the king then Azriel would have died but at no point is her own safety a concern or a consideration here. But…Yeah, sure, Mor doesn’t care about Cass that’s…just. yeah. 

Next point: 

But Mor hopped off the bed, opened the door for me, and said, “There are good days and hard days for me—even now. Don’t let the hard days win.”

I’m using this as a kind of catch-all quote for a couple of points. First of all I think a lot of people seem to think Mor is ‘over’ what happened to her? Or there’s certainly a lot of talk about how ‘jfc it was 500 years ago move on’ when it comes to Mor…yet we frequently discuss Cassian, Azriel and Rhys’s childhoods (funny that) Anyway, the point is that Mor is not just magically better/never suffers for her trauma. She still has hard days. She just doesn’t let them win. But that means that all of that aloofness, all of that irreverence, all of that brightness and light and hope is something that she fights for. Constantly. Trauma does not have an expiry date, it doesn’t just up and leave one day, it still affects her, it still hurts her, she just refuses to let it beat her. And that makes her strong af but anyway. 

Second thing I want to talk about is how much Mor opens up for Feyre’s benefit. I’m just using this quote for that because it happens several times throughout the book and we’d be here all day if I quoted them all and they’re well enough known I think that I don’t need them. But Mor rips open old wounds of hers over and over and over again for Feyre. She tells her what happened in grim, explicit detail, she tells her how it affected her, she rips open those wounds again to show Feyre that it is possible to heal from them. It’s possible to endure the dark horrors that she, that they both, have endured and still come out able to love and trust and be bright and warm and friendly and selfless. 

(And aside from Feyre’s storyline and what this does for her this is an incredibly important message for abuse survivors in an audience as well. Because it’s a fairly frequent thing that we see- especially female characters- suffer some form of abuse or hurt (usually at the hands of men) and as a result they become acerbic and cold and withdrawn and mistrustful. I am not in anyway saying that this is a ‘bad’ response to trauma or pain. It happens. It’s real. But in terms of media portrayal seeing something that actively goes against that is I think incredibly important. Because that’s not what has to happen. Mor came out of what she endured and she came out of it soft and warm and selfless and loving and that’s a perfectly valid endpoint of recovery too. Dark days don’t have to lead to more darkness. They can lead to bright, warm sunshine too. and that’s important.) 

This also leads me on to the role Mor plays in the Court of Dreams. I’ve talked before about her position in the Court of Nightmares being empowering (and a perfect counterpoint to the Tamlin/Lucien dynamic when it comes to thinking about her and Rhys and how they respond/react to her being forced to return to the site of her abuse/trauma) And it is. She is given power over her abusers. Her father is reduced to a steward and she is given not only authority over him but she is given his authority. She rules the place that tormented her and that is so incredibly important but it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t affect her, it doesn’t mean that she isn’t performing a selfless act for the sake of her court and it doesn’t mean that it’s easy for her (hint: it’s not) 

Maybe I should have asked Mor to come. But she’d left after dinner, pale-faced and jumpy, ignoring Cassian’s attempt to speak with her. 
[…]
“How was your visit to the Court of Nightmares?”
She paused, her face going uncharacteristically pale. “Fine. It’s always a delight to see my parents. As you might guess.”
[…]
“I’m sorry—for all that you endured.”
“Thank you,” she said, coming over to watch me. “Visiting them always leaves me raw.”

 All of these are Mor’s direct responses either facing a trip to the CoN (the first quote) or after visiting them (the second). Yes Mor is in a position of power over her abusers. Yes that is, in a sense, empowering and likely helpful in terms of her recovery. But the fact is that she does, and has for centuries, returned to the place that she was abused and tortured and traumatised. It’s like what Feyre does at the end of ACOMAF - returning to the Spring Court with Tamlin for the good of her court. Except Mor has been doing this for hundreds of years, even though it leaves her raw, even though it can still make her panicky and upset. She does it. Which makes her brave and selfless as all hell I will fight you on this point. 

More things: 

 Cassian realized I was in one piece and hurtled for Rhys, who was struggling to rise, mud covering his bare skin, but Mor—Mor saw my face.
I went up to her, cold and hollow. “I want you to take me somewhere far away,” I said. “Right now.” I needed to get away—needed to think, to have space and quiet and calm.
Mor looked between us, biting her lip.
“Please,” I said, and my voice broke on the word.
Behind me, Rhys moaned my name again.
Mor scanned my face once more, and gripped my hand.
We vanished into wind and night.

 […]

“Still recovering, but fine. Pissed at me, of course, but he can shove it.
I combined Mor’s yellow gold with the red I’d used for the Illyrian wings, and blended until vibrant orange emerged. “Thank you—for not telling him I was here.”
A shrug.

Again Mor puts other people’s needs over own. She took Feyre away from Rhys - knowing it would hurt Rhys, knowing it would upset him, knowing that Feyre was forcing her to choose a side but choosing it anyway. Then she dismisses Rhys being angry with her and Feyre’s thanks for what it cost her to help her and keep her location from Rhys (I’m pretty sure Rhys didn’t just politely ask her this once over a cup of tea and then let the matter drop. Not if Mor describes him as being pissed at her) 

Even more evidence: 

It was satisfactory enough to my mate—who at last looked at Mor.
She nodded once, but said, “I know my orders.”
I wondered what those might be—why I hadn’t been told—but she gripped my hand.
[…]
Mor kept at my side, constantly monitoring. The last line of defense.
If Cassian and Azriel were hurt, I realized, she was to make sure I got out by whatever means. Then return.

Right to make this part even more explicit, because I think the difficulty here of what Mor has to do is possible to be underrated and I want there to be no doubt: before they went to infiltrate Hybern Rhys ordered Mor to leave Cassian and Azriel, two of the people she loves most in the world, behind if they were injured in order to get Feyre to safety. And this is something that Mor agreed to and acknowledged and I have no doubt would have done if the need had arisen. And then, once she had gotten Feyre to safety, she herself would have returned and put herself in an incredible amount of danger to get them back. 

This is like….the dictionary definition of selflessness idk what to tell you any more okay. 

Is this enough? Do I need to say more? Or can we just, like re-read ACOMAF and remind ourselves what an incredible specimen of pure selfless goodness Morrigan is? 

TL;DR: Mor is selfless af and I will fight you on this point. That is all. 

anonymous asked:

Why does the game so badly to try to trick the player into killing toriel, with the sudden unavoidable crit and all? Isn't that kinda a cheap trick to pull on a body? It's hard for me to accept the message of the game when it's so manipulative all like that.

See, I actually love this, because I don’t take it as a value judgment. See, if you see Undertale as a game about being nice and not hurting anyone no matter what, the Toriel fight is tricky. But if you see it as a game about thwarting fate, it fits perfectly … I’ll show you what I mean.

Do you know what kind of game Undertale was going to be? When it was just a ghost of an idea in Toby’s head, when he hadn’t actually  gotten it ironed out? In Cave Story, you have to kill Toroko in order to progress in the game, There’s a big tragedy and you need to kill her to progress. You can’t do anything about it.

In the first version of Undertale that existed in Toby’s head, you had to kill Toriel to progress. HAD TOO. In the first version of Undertale, this world truly WAS kill or be killed.

So like, clearly mercy is the choice you’re meant to find eventually. But are you meant to find it on the first time? Are you meant to get through this flawlessly? 

Kill or be killed. That’s the rule. That’s the choice the game thrusts on you. That’s what Flowey says to Frisk. And Flowey is right.

Undertale is the tragedy of a child floundering through the Underground and getting out at the end, leaving friends behind, but also damage, hurt feelings, hurt people. And Undertale is the story of looking back at that tragedy and saying 

HELL.

NO.

The ‘trick’ doesn’t register as a trick anymore if you think about it that way. Not JUST as a story about being kind, but a story about changing fate. The best way to play Undertale is to go in without knowing you can save everyone, and discovering that through the course of the game. 

It’s why I’m super frustrated with the ‘this is how you’re meant to play the game’ crowd. If you’re telling someone how to play the game, you’re stopping them from playing the best way.

I don’t hold how easy it is to kill Toriel against the game for that reason. I don’t think of killing Toriel, or any of the monsters, as a failure in the first run. I think it helps the experience.

A Lesson...

“You think he’d touch you like this?” Mark asked, edging you backwards until your shoulders bumped against the wall. The very tips of his fingers reached down to ghost over your hip and across your stomach towards the top of your pants, much the same way you’d written Lucifer doing.

You trembled under his touch, startled at how quickly he adopted Lucifer mannerisms and the very air about him changed, growing colder and almost sinister. The light in his eyes dimmed and a darkness seemed to take over, and while you’d witnessed this on set, alone in your private trailer, it was an entirely different matter.

A flicker of fear fluttered up inside you, but your arousal quickly had it overthrown…


Full fic coming soon…


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For your consideration:

Imagine that it’s the early days of Erik haunting the opera house. Everyone is terrified and not really sure what to make of the ghost yet. What they know is that he wants the opera run a certain way, and when things go his way, everything is fine. 

For one particularly difficult production, a superstitious stagehand decides to take matters into their own hands. They build a small shrine for the ghost in one of the closets, and leave him a few offerings to try and appease him. Little things, like a small cut of their salary, some chocolates (can ghosts even eat?) and other items they think will please him. They say some quick words to the shrine, hoping the ghost is listening, and ask for his mercy for tonight’s performance.

Imagine they come back after the show and everything on the shrine is gone, and in the items’ place, a note, to the effect of:

“Your offering is acceptable.”

Erik thinks the whole thing is hilarious and allows it to go on.

Under the Cloak. (M)

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Smut + Harry Potter AU

Word Count: 7,741

Description: Gryffindor’s star seeker is in danger of being disqualified from participating in their upcoming match against Slytherin due to his less than stellar grade in potions. You’re forced into tutoring him… however you didn’t know that would entail the two of you being at the library, after hours, underneath an invisibility cloak, where you quickly learn that quidditch isn’t the only thing Kim Taehyung excels in.  

cr.


Your Name: submit info.


You felt yourself racing down the corridors as the thoughts of today’s lesson fueled the excitement in your steps. Professor Snape was going to be showing your class how to concoct wolfsbane potion. The thought of being able to reduce the madness that comes along with lycanthropy pumping excitement throughout your entire body—which in hindsight is probably how you managed to run smackdab into the wolf himself; Kim Taehyung.

Your vision flicked upwards, locking onto the obvious smirk of his lips as his hands made their way to your sides as he steadied your body. You immediately roll your eyes as you throw away any attempt at the fake apology you were going to issue him. You swiftly grab his arms, yanking them from your sides, before shooting him a venomous glare.

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Woman in Black (Part One)

Bucky Barnes X Reader

Full Story Summary: As the Avengers take down another Hydra base, they are greeted with a powerful, emotionless soldier being controlled by Hydra. Bucky vows to save her.

Word Count: 2031

Warnings: Injuries, fighting, angst? I guess, near death

A/N: Heyo! So this was originally gonna be a oneshot but as I started writing it, it turned into a lot bigger of a project than I imagined so I’m going to make it a little mini series of like two or three parts. Probs three. Well I hope you guys like it! And I’ll try to post the next part soon.

Originally posted by complete-fandom-trashhh

Bucky never expected to find a person so incredibly similar to him, ever. He thought he was the only person, the only one to have memories ripped from him by Hydra. The only one to have lost himself to the evils of brain washing, mind numbing torture, and impossible physical fitness that couldn’t be achieved without hours upon hours of constant training and beatings. But here he stood gazing at a woman very similar to himself when he was the Winter Soldier. Her eyes were a beautiful (E/C) but they were hooded and dark, dead and emotionless. She was truly stunning but years of abuse showed in the stoic set to her lips, the greasy and untamed nature of her hair and the jagged scar that spans across her jawline and down, disappearing under the collar of her tactical suit. The sight made him sick, sick that he wasn’t the only one, that this gorgeous creature was turned into a tainted weapon and could no longer be called an individual. And he knew that if she ever returned to her right mind, she would be forever haunted by the ghosts of her victims and be forever in regret, he knew this first hand. So as she approached he promised to himself that this girl would be saved, she wouldn’t be alone, he would help her no matter the cost, since he knew. He knew what being controlled like a puppet did to your sanity. He snaps back into action with a few members of his new family, all who noticed the new threat, the woman in black.

“Heavily armed target exiting the base, keep your eyes on her.” Bucky speaks through the coms even though he knows they’ve seen her.

“Steve… I think she’s… I think she’s being controlled.” He once again speaks through the coms though now his voice is barely whisper. Steve’s head snaps up to look at Bucky even while fighting the other enemies, and then snaps towards their new guest, most likely recognizing the look that Bucky wore when he was under the control of Hydra. The woman saunters towards the battlefield with a grace none of the present Avengers expect considering the heavy outfit she wore. This was just as shocking as the swiftness that she moved with when attacking.

“Guys, we need to try to capture her ali-” Steve is cut short. Natasha, Sam, Wanda, Bucky and even Clint in the quinjet are caught off guard when the woman decks the great Captain America with a high kick sending him crashing to the ground on his back. Though Steve shook off the surprise quickly enough to roll away from the deadly curb stomp sent towards his skull. He quickly recovers and snaps up from the ground to quickly dodge a flying punch. The woman’s attack were relentless and continuous leaving no room for Steve to counter or even get away from the flurry of attacks, all he could do was dodge and even then he would still get grazed. The others are unable to help him as they are busy with the hordes of lower ranked troops, though they are quickly diminishing. Natasha rapidly takes out the soldiers surrounding her with a spiral kick giving her just enough time and space to go and help the Captain. 

She runs towards the duelers and launches herself into the black clad woman, swinging around her body and locking her legs around the threats neck, using her weight to drop the girl to the ground. The ambush seemed to barely phase the woman because even as she fell towards the ground she was prepared. Her arms shot out to catch herself before pulling herself into a ball to perform a somersault, dislodging Natasha’s from their place around her neck. She rolls forward and recovers before driving her foot behind her quickly, catching Natasha in the jaw. The pure force of the kick sends Natasha tumbling away from the (blonde, brunette, etc.). Thankfully though Nat had given Steve enough time to recover from his battle with the girl and he was quickly on top of her in Nat’s place. Before the woman was able to turn to face him again, Steve slams into her with his shield as his battering ram, so to speak. He can hear the sound of the woman’s ribs cracking under the force he used and mentally cringes. He is astounded when the woman doesn’t even flinch, no reaction, no scream, nothing. She is forced forward and stumbles over her feet before regaining her balance and charging back towards her previous attacker. Steve expects another barrage of punches but is startled when launches herself at him and swings herself around him to wrap her legs around his neck and pulls him toward the ground.

“Holy shit! She learned that after it getting used on her once?!” Sam sounds as bewildered as Steve feels. Steve is unable to recover like the woman in black did after she was taken down with the same move. Steve hits the ground hard, face first and the girl shifts so she is digging her knee in between his shoulder blades. He lets out a groan of pain and tries to push up but she grabs his arms and pulls his arms far behind his back and he feels one of his shoulders pop out of place. He lets out a yell at the sudden pain. With one of his arms disabled he knows he won’t be able to get free without help but just as he thinks this he feels a belt wrap around his neck, the woman had pulled a belt off her uniform just to strangle him. She starts to pull up on the belt and Steve struggles, scratching at the belt with his non-injured arm to try to get at least so relief. And then the pressure is gone and the belt falls, the girl is sent tumbling with Bucky after he tackled her off of Steve. They roll for a second, both of them fighting to get the upper hand. Bucky ends up on top of her leaning his weight down on top of her, metal arm pressing down hard, trying to push her shoulders to the ground. He is unsuccessful though because she snaps her head up and head buts him, breaking his nose. He rears back in pain and she takes the chance to switch the rolls and tosses him to the side and comes up on top, straddling him. She wastes no time and starts bashing his face with punches, right hook, left hook, right hook, left hook, right hook. Luckily this doesn’t last long before she is wrenched away from Bucky and two arms wrap under her arms and pin her to a chest.

“Got her!” Sam yells before the girl throws her body weight forward, throwing Falcon over her back and onto Bucky. The shock and impact make both men groan, but the girl lifts Sam off of his teammate before throwing him away. Clint watches the whole thing from above in utter bewilderment, the heroes of the world getting there asses handed to them by one person. How was this even happening?

Natasha is once again in action and fighting the nearly unstoppable enemy, her broken jaw throbbing. She is dancing around the woman in black, bending and folding, dodging all of the powerful attacks. After a few more missed attacks, the woman takes a step back before yanking  a Sig P320 pistol and fires a shot at Black Widow, though it was not a deadly shot, the bullet pierces through Nat’s shoulder. A scream is ripped from Nat’s throat as she collapses to the ground. The woman stalks toward the injured Black Widow with gun hanging limply in her (right/ left) hand. She reaches Nat and hovers above her, raising the gun to point it at her head. Nat looks up into her eyes defiantly, not cowering away from her death. The woman’s finger twitches at the trigger but she hesitates and lowers the gun, Nat noticing something flash in her eyes, something looking like pain and regret before the woman is torn away by Bucky. He grabs her wrists pulling them behind her back before snaps industrial looking handcuffs onto her wrists. The woman just struggles, still no sounds leaving her mouth. She pulls and kicks and thrashes but Bucky doesn’t let go, arms holding tight around her middle. As this happens Clint has landed the quinjet running to help Natasha and Sam has helped Steve up from the ground, all of the other assailants taken care of much earlier. The girl keeps thrashing, trying to get away and Bucky stares into her eyes, trying to anchor her down.Then in a flash, she stiffens unnaturally and Bucky swears he sees a look of pure terror form on her face before her eyes dull and she slumps over in his arms. Her sudden dead weight makes him nearly drop her, but he recovers. He doesn’t know what happened.

Did she pass out? Did she hit her head on something and knocked herself out? But I thought I saw her expression change. And she stiffened, is that a normal thing that happens before you pass out? His thoughts run wild, not knowing what to think.

“Buck, we have to go now! Nat needs medical attention and she needs it soon!” Steve calls to him, holding his dislocated shoulder as he stands by the quinjet, Clint carrying Nat inside to set her on one of the benches before instructing Sam to keep pressure on her wound as he runs to the cockpit to call the compound, telling them that they would need immediate medical attention when they arrived. Bucky gently picks up the woman in black, cradling her gently against his chest as he runs to the jet. When he gets inside the jet, he gently places her on the bench across from Nat but not before he undoes her cuffs and switches them to the front of her body and chains her to a bar on the wall of the jet above her head. He sits down next to her looking over her finding her gaze unfocused and body completely limp. He raises his arms up and props his elbows on his knees, placing his head in his hands as the quinjet lifts off.

“What happened to her?” Steve asks as he comes up to him and sits next to him.

“… I don’t know, she just kind of stiffened before going completely limp… Steve she was emotionless the whole time she fought us but before she became like this she looked absolutely terrified. Why would she be so scared?….” He questions more to himself than to Steve.

“I don’t know Buck.” Steve whispers back. 

“Buck, she is so beat up… and the whole time she didn’t let out a peep, nothing. She should have been screaming in pain but she was so quiet. I know I broke some of her ribs but she didn’t even react.” He says feeling sick. What could have been done to her to make her so… dead? Bucky doesn’t answer, but just stares down at the small but strong body lying beside him.

“She wasn’t completely emotionless.” Natasha’s scratchy voice draws their attention to her. 

“Nat, don’t talk, it’ll just make it worse.” Steve says standing up to walk to her side.

“She wasn’t, she was going to kill me but she didn’t. Her gun was pointed at my head and finger on the trigger but she didn’t, she lowered her gun and she looked so pained. So sorry.” Nat stops, taking heavy breaths, trying to get the rest out through her pain. 

“She could have killed all of us but she never went for the immediate kill, always one that would take longer. She was stalling so we could stop her. But she knew the consequences if she didn’t fight to kill so she did.” She finishes breathily settling down onto the bench finally relaxing. Sam, Steve and Bucky all look back towards the limp woman surprised.

“Wow… I didn’t even notice. I couldn’t even believe you wanted to capture in the first place.” Sam says, and Bucky looks towards him. 

“I thought she was being controlled but I have no idea how. And now she’s like this…” He said once again placing his head in his hands. 

“How many people’s lives do they have to ruin?” Sam asks sadly, meant more as a statement then as a question. Bucky just shakes his head.

If You’re Going Through Hell - Stiles Stilinski Imagine

Author: dylanowhy

Summary: You wake up in a train station not knowing exactly how you got there. Everyone seems to be acting like zombies, all but one boy. Someone who seems to keep smiling through it all.

Pairings: Stiles Stilinski x Reader

Warnings: Language. Kissing.

Word Count: 4,750

Originally posted by stydia-barnes


Damp. It was such an uncomfortable word for you, but even a more uncomfortable feeling. Soon you realized it was your own sweat, and you wondered how much of a restless night you had actually had. You blinked your eyes open, but what you saw before you was not the cool toned bedroom you were so use to. You saw rust and ugly greens, dark places mixed with blinking lights, but there was no one. Not a single person in sight. You shot up from the bench that you were starting to feel the pain from sleeping on. Eyes frantic but head not moving, there was a pang in your neck and as much as you wanted to speak or call out, you couldn’t find your voice. Like it had been taken from you. Licking your dry lips, you picked up on a faint noise behind you, it was soft breathing, but for some reason you found it quite calming. Turning slowly you took notice of a brown headed boy who had his back to you, it sounded like he was sleeping, making part of you not wanting to wake him up. “Excuse me.” You whispered, realizing how weak your voice was. You were starting to wonder how long you had been down here, to wonder if anyone had been looking for you. “Excuse me.” Your voice was louder, causing a halt in the soft breathing, head lifting to turn and look at you. You shouldn’t have been so awestruck by the way his soft eyes connected with yours, or how the corner of his lips twitched up in a slight smile, but you found yourself melting in your seat, cursing that there was no mirror around you.

“You’re new.” His voice was not what you expected. It was soft and yet there was a rasp behind it, it kept you clinging to him every word. “New?” You asked, eyebrows knitted together in confusion. At the beginning you were wondering how long you had been here, but now, you were curious about how long he had been there, curious as to how many more people had been in here and more importantly what had happened to them. He hummed, nodding in silence as he re-positioned his body, his left leg on the bench so he could face you a little better. “Every week or so, there is a new person. They come in sane, talkative and sometimes even fun. Last week, Becca came in. She was a riot for a while, probably the longest there has been, five days maybe? But sooner or later, everyone falls into routine.” There was this hint of sadness in his voice that you just couldn’t shake. There were so many pieces to this puzzle and yet you couldn’t put them all together. “What routine?” You questioned, his eyes raising as if you should know the answer already. “You’ll see, come over here.” He sat back upright, patting the empty spot next to him. You were quick with your movements, eager to be next to him. What happened next was probably one of the scariest things you have ever witness before in your life, so much so that you couldn’t stop your hand from reaching and taking the strangers, holding it tightly as you watched them pile in.

Keep reading

Damn it, are you drunk? {Theo Raeken}

gif is not mine, credits to the owner. ♥

Fandom: Teen Wolf

Pairing: Theo Raeken X Reader

Words: 963

Warnings: idk, mentions of sex??

Summary: The reader gets drunk and Theo have to control himself to take care of her

A/N: This is probably gonna suck :/ Read at your own risk and let me know what you think.


Theo Raeken was a lot of things ­— a good liar, an ambitious chimera, even a little hot headed sometimes. However, if there was one thing he was not, was dumb. So when his bell rang and Y/N stood by his door with a mysterious smile on her face, Theo knew that something was up.

“Y/N,” he greeted, showing her his usual smirk. “What brings you here?”

What he wasn’t expecting, however, was that she would trip on the small degree in front of his door, falling straight into his arms while laughing hysterically. Usually, she would be embarrassed as hell if something like that happened, but to his surprise, she just ignored the occurred and shakily stood up, staring at him with an uncharacteristic smile.

“Theo~” she muttered in a sing-sang voice, glad to see him.

Theo raised his brows. “Are you…?”

The pieces suddenly settled in his mind, and reality hit Theo like a truck at full charge.

“Damn it, are you drunk?”

Y/N didn’t bothered in answer; instead, she tip-toed in front of him and pressed her lips to his so quickly that Theo couldn’t even think about what to do, confirming his suspicions. Her arms embraced his neck and her rosy lips were soft and hurried against his own, tasting clearly as some whisky Theo had proved before. He resisted the urge to kiss her back, to press his body against hers and deepen the kiss, but could not spare the chance to enjoy the feeling of her lips touching his so willingly.

“Stop,” he managed to break the kiss somehow, knowing that this wasn’t right, no matter how he wanted it to be. Control yourself. Breath. “Stop it, Y/N.”

“No,” she stated dizzily, senseless hugging him closer and pouting like a kid, her lips ghosting over his. “I’m so lonely, why are you being so cold?”

“You are not thinking straight.”

Y/N mumbled a few incomprehensible words, shook her right hand vigorously as if to make her point clear, and leaned in for another kiss, but Theo cleverly dodged it right before her mouth touched his, earning an unhappy whimper from her. Unfortunately, her kiss attained to his neck, making him gasp lightly.

God, you have to stop,” Theo nearly begged before quickly moving her hands away from his face, holding her wrists to prevent her from touching him again. He wasn’t sure that he could control himself if he didn’t keep her away enough.

She stumbled on her own feet, trying to get her hands free from his grasp uselessly.

“Why…?” she asked with a flash of innocence in her stunned eyes. “Don’t you want me anymore?”

These words almost made Theo succumb to his will and forget what was right; damn it his conscience, he couldn’t stop thinking about her ever since their first night together. He couldn’t forget her warm kisses, her soft skin or the way she reacted to his touch, and now she was right in front of him, asking if he wasn’t attracted for her anymore as if it would be even possible. Theo wanted nothing more than to attach his lips to hers and show her how much he wanted to be with her again, but something was holding him back, making him think twice.

A feeling of pure affect for her and deep caring for her wellbeing — something he had never felt for anyone before. He didn’t wanted her to do something that she would regret later, he didn’t wanted to take advantage of her.

“You have no idea what you do to me,” Theo said honestly, still holding her wrists firmly.

Y/N struggled on Theo’s grasp, desperately trying to get free.

“Show me then,” she asked sweetly.

He nearly chuckled, nearly. “I would love to, sweetheart, but I can’t.”

Y/N looked at him disappointed, and then loosened her own weight in his arms, forcing Theo to release her hands to catch her by the waist, impeding her from falling straight to the floor. She gave him a childish smile, wrapping her arms around his neck immediately.

“Am I your sweetheart?” she asked happily, her face so close to his that he could smell the alcohol on her breath.

“You’re such a child,” Theo said with a smile, staring at her innocent expression. It wasn’t longer before she leaned in and planted a kiss on his chin, earning a soft, unexpected chuckle.

Why did she drank that much?

Truth was, Theo was enjoying himself deep down. He was enjoying the fact that she thought about him on her drunk state, that she came to him and that she was so shamelessly saying those things willingly, things she would never have said sober. She was too self-conscious to say anything this daring.  

When sober, Y/N was always discreet and contained to a point that it was even hard to know what she was thinking or what she wanted. Theo always had a hard time trying to guess what she needed, and he was the one to tease her any chance he had. She was usually sweet and even innocent, normally blushing with minimal words.

The woman in Theo’s arms was not that girl.

“I’m never letting you drink again,” Theo decided, lifting her up bridal-style. Y/N chuckled hysterically on her drunk state before resting her head on his chest, apparently starting to feel tired, finally.

He carried her to his bedroom carefully, trying not to think about the last time the two had been in a room alone. Placing Y/N on his bed, Theo noticed that she was already with her eyes closed peacefully.

He sighed, leaned down and kissed her forehead softly, trying not to wake her up.

“Good night, drunk.”

Of course, when she wake up next morning, he would the tease the hell out of her.


A/N: I’m writing a part 2 for this, but I’m not sure if I should post it, so I would appreciate if you let me know what you think. Thank you for reading! ♥

i know this is an unpopular opinion but: jack and maddie are not abusive parents.

they’re not going to be winning parents of the year awards by any means, but they are not abusive. they are involved in both of their children’s lives but know not to push into their privacy. they trust their children to make good decisions and encourage them to pursue their interests even if jack and maddie aren’t interested. they don’t talk down to their kids when they’re arguing and speak to them at an age appropriate level. they aren’t emotionally or verbally abusive - even when danny is being disciplined, they are reasonable. they’re pushy when they’re concerned for his safety, but you can’t blame them when you see how dangerous amity park is.
it’s clear that they made sure that both jazz and danny knew the functions and operations of the lab, the ops center, and the home security system and that both of them knew the safety rules of both. they trusted their children not to abuse the equipment and to follow safety procedures (which danny did not do on multiple occasions).

do they have a violent and harsh approach to ghosts? yes, but ghosts that come through the portal are mostly violent and powerful. they are technically fighting a war - an invasion of poltergeists and mostly alone too. they are working to defend their family and city from a mistake they made. also, have you noticed that a lot of the weapons that they make only weaken and contain ghosts? that they haven’t actually made a single weapon designed to completely destroy a ghost? yes for the most part they have no empathy for ghosts, but they’re not out to destroy them. i do think that they put on a façade that makes them look harsher on ghosts than they really are - if jack hated and distrusted ghosts so much, he wouldn’t have released danny in million dollar ghost.

and yes, both jack and maddie get sucked into their projects, but they make sure their kids know where they are and will stop what they’re doing if jazz or danny need them. the only times they were shown as being completely neglectful is during the christmas flashbacks when they were so wrapped up in their arguments that they forgot their children (but also remember those were told by tucker/ghostwriter who are BOTH dramatic). they have both shown themselves to be more than willing to spend time with their kids and they were excited for it.

the fact that they don’t push into danny’s life when he is obviously wanting privacy isn’t abusive or completely neglectful. they make themselves available to him, spend time with him, and will do things in his best interest. they trust and respect their son and they keep an eye on him. the reason why they know so little about his problems at school are because danny doesn’t reach out to them. they have shown themselves open and willing to protect him, but danny internalizes his problems and refuses to talk to them. jack and maddie do try to have conversations with him and when he gets uncomfortable, they let him leave.

danny also knows all of this and he knows that they’ll love him no matter what (he even said so in bitter reunions and confirmed this in reality trip). there are a lot of reasons why he doesn’t tell his parents about his ghost powers (doesn’t want them worrying, doesn’t want they thinking they half killed him, doesn’t want them to accidentally reveal his identity, etc) and i think it’s the combination of those fears along with the worry that they might be scared of him/hostile towards him that stops danny from talking to them. even if you know something to be true (like your parents loving you unconditionally), there is always room for doubt and danny definitely suffers from that.

so no, i don’t think the fentons are abusive parents and i don’t think it’s right to try and label them as such.