not just the characters mind you

anonymous asked:

are there any limits or "don't"s as to what a persona can be?

I don’t really think of “don’t”s when making personae- they’re cognitive representations, so I feel like you’d be able to make a persona based on what you think people would think when it comes to the deity/legend you choose!

one of my most favorite examples is the redesigning of Princess Kaguya: the things you’d most associate with her would be a graceful young woman, the Junihito-e (Heian court lady layered outfit), Outer space (astronauts, aliens, UFOs), and Moon Rabbits

so the designers literally put all of those together- she has bunny ears on something that looks like an astronaut’s helmet, and the outer metallic piece around her arms look like a fusion between the layered coats of the junihito-e and a UFO!

for March Hare (the initial concept for Br’er Rabbit) I ended up thinking about steampunk, porcelain teacups and rabbits, and went with those~

if anything tho I think there’s a pattern when it comes to personae of certain arcanas, though IDK if those applied to player character personas (the Temperance Arcana usually has animals which is why I chose a trickster rabbit in the first place hoho) but that’s really it.

u just gotta look at the various design elements employed by the game and see if you can mash something up using those + the stuff associated with the character you wanna use *u*

onethousandcentipedes  asked:

Do you agree with the theories of Touka becoming pregnant and if so, how do you think that would advance the plot? I haven't made a decision about the possibility since I'm having trouble imagining any concrete purpose for it besides shock factor or a device for more tragedy.

The last chapter definitely pointed in that direction. It might just be a pure character moment, but usually Ishida ties his character moments intrinsically to the plot itself, and a pregnancy is the most obvious knock-on plot effect of a sex scene. Even so, I would still be sceptical if it weren’t for Ishida’s ‘rotten womb’ poem about the Kirishimas. With that in mind, it seems very likely.

Thematically, I think the main purpose of such an event would be threefold:

Firstly, to tear Kaneki between the role thrust upon him and his own secret motivation. Previously, they were compatible, but since Kaneki fights for the sake of his loved ones, he will find his responsibility as a father outweighing his role as the One-Eyed King. This will be part of the upcoming Judgement Arc, where Kaneki will have to decide what is truly important to him and discover his true purpose for living within himself, rather than in the laps of others.

Born for both love and revolution, Kaneki will try to keep both - having learnt all too well from the first Shironeki and the Black Reaper (his Revolution) what sacrificing everything for a greater purpose will lead to, but also knowing how he can’t protect his loved ones without a purpose from his time as Kuroneki and Haise (his Love). It is Touka who will make the decision to prevent him from losing everything in his refusal to play the game of choice any longer.

Secondly, to tear Touka between her desire to fight by Kaneki’s side and her inability to do exactly that. Like in the original Anteiku arc, she will be behind the major scenes of battle, this time for the baby’s sake, a conscious choice on her part even while Kaneki is reluctant to force her to do it after their talk. But eventually the sheer level of danger Kaneki is in will get to her, and, not wanting things to end up the way they did the last time, will go to save him and successfully - but in the struggle, the baby will die in utero.

Which brings me to the third purpose: an important lesson in the difficulties of parenthood for these two whose lives have revolved around their own parents. After the failures of their own parents, it would be of paramount importance that they succeed here, and even if they knew the baby would likely die from their differing biology anyway, the fact that it specifically died due to their choices will be a cruel but necessary lesson to demonstrate just how difficult being a parent really is in this brutal world. The pain might help them find a new level of closure with their own parental issues - not necessarily forgiveness, but closure. It will be the last major tribute taken by the birdcage they seek to destroy - and it must be destroyed. That final loss will wash all doubts away from Kaneki’s mind. He will become the One-Eyed King in truth, and not just a boy wearing his crown.

Ok, I’m going to rant ... I know I shouldn’t, but I’ve been reading and listening to people’s reviews of Dead Men Tell No Tales, and you know what I’ve found? That most people are so fucking hard to please, it’s maddening. For example, people are bitching that Jack is too depressed and drunk in this one, that he isn’t the same positive, happy-go-lucky pirate that we saw in the first movie ... well, duh! He’s been stuck on land for the past goodness knows how many years, his ship is stuck in a fucking bottle, and he doesn’t have a crew! Of COARSE he’s not gonna be in a fucking cheery mood! Of COARSE he’s gonna want to get drunk off his face! I mean, ffs, he’s a pirate! The only place he’s happy is on the ocean, but he hasn’t been able to BE on the ocean because, again, HE HASN’T GOT A FUCKING SHIP OR CREW!! Then, of coarse, you have people comparing the bank heist scene to the scene in Fast 5, saying that Disney copied it. Seriously? Are people really THAT small-minded? I fucking swear, filmmakers can’t put ANYTHING into the plots of their films without some fuckwhistle comparing it to a scene in another movie! One person also said that Salazar wasn’t in the movie very much, and that if you are going to see the movie for Salazar, don’t ... Bitch, I will fucking see the movie for Salazar even if he’s in it for five fucking minutes! I did not wait a whole fucking year, getting excited for this character, AND he fact that he was being played by Javier Bardem, just for you to tell me not to fucking see it! Who the fuck are you to tell people whether or not they should see a movie?! Let people make up their OWN goddamn minds!  I could go on and on about the bitchiness that eminated from these reviewers, but I won’t, because it will only depress you. Either way, I’m still going to see this movie, I’m going to ENJOY this movie - because I’m not going to fucking sit their with a stick up my arse and compare it to the last ones - and all these whiney, hard-to-please haters can retreat back into the shadows of the sad little gutters they crawled out of.

anonymous asked:

How do I write with more emotion, like how can I make the reader feel exactly what the character is going through?

One thing that I believe I have mentioned on this blog before for a previous ask is the use of “power words”. As a brief run down, power words simply put are words that are sort of tethered to particular emotions just by connotation, such that they subconsciously remind the reader of that emotion. Some examples:

Fear/Pain: agony, panic, peril, bloody, prison, shatter
Positives/ Strength: Amazing, breathtaking, hero, valor, spirit
Anger/Revenge: Lies, loathing, revolt, stuck-up, coward, bully
Safety: Promise, authentic, unconditional, protected
Unsafe/Suspicious: Secret, confession, forbidden, unspoken, smuggled, withheld

Things like metaphors, power words, and so on can be employed for practical use when writing, to convey emotions simply in the way you state things, even without a specific character in mind.

The best writers are the ones who are also good empathizers. It sounds a little cliche, but really, put yourself in your character’s shoes and try to truly imagine how they feel. If your character’s mother just died, “this sucks and it feels bad and sucky” is a general truth, but it’s not really going make the scene effective. Really do some research on the stages of grief, and also keep in mind your character’s other traits. Maybe they jump to denial, maybe they instantly wallow in memories, maybe they’re numb, maybe they act strong, but eventually, each and every one of them is going to have to come to terms. What does it look like when they do?

One problem that goes along with that is that writers often look at an emotion and only think of it as one thing, when really, it’s not possible to only feel one thing at a time. People feel a whole mix of things at a time, and sometimes one emotion is stronger than the others, but addressing the complexity is what adds true depth. Saying “I feel lost, and betrayed, and confused, and like there is a big whole in my life, and mad that I lost this thing” is more effective than saying “This is sad and I am sad about.”

At the same time, readers don’t like to slog through paragraphs of being told what to feel or how the character is feeling. You can tell a little, but now is also really an opportunity to use the *show* part of show and tell to your advantage. Consider:

Gideon felt the rage well within him faster than he could contain it. The betrayal stung more than he felt he could express, and his voice shook as he spoke. “Why, damn you? Why would you do that to me if you said that you care about me?”


Gideon felt the rage well within him faster than he could contain it. His mind went blank as his hand curled into a fist, bellowing with rage as he let the white hot anger carry his fist through the air, hitting the wall with a scream. He could barely feel the pain, his voice shaking as he spoke. “Why, damn you? Why would you do that to me if you said that you care about me?”

The first one is okay, and you can definitely tell Gideon is mad. However, by adding the action in the second, it really amps up the emotion by a lot. Actions speak louder than words, as they say.

Another nifty trick- if you are having trouble getting your character to say what they feel, start with yourself. When I used to act, my director taught me how to transfer my emotions into a scene. In one such moment, my character was excitedly talking about a recipe that I have never eaten before in my life and that I honestly probably wouldn’t even like. It was hard to sound genuinely excited about it, so what I did was start talking about something that I am actually excited about, and then halfway through, switch to my actual line. By doing so, I carried on the emotion, and all I had to switch out was the words that were being said.

Sometimes- in rare occasions-the best thing to do is to say it like it is. The best example I know of is the beginning of Lemony Snicket’s “A Series of Unfortunate Events,” after the Baudelaire children receive the news of their parents’ death, and the narrator, Mr. Snicket, simply says:
“It is useless for me to describe to you how terrible Violet, Klaus, and even Sunny felt in the time that followed. If you have ever lost someone very important to you, then you already know how it feels, and if you haven’t, you cannot possibly imagine it.”

Even that, in this specific situation, resonates. “You cannot possibly imagine it.”

Now, for the big, big truth, the key answer that I can give you:

The number one way that never fails to make a reader care about what your character is going through is to make them care about your character. If your character is well-developed, likable, relatable, then you have already successfully engineered a nice little trap into making your readers care about what is happening. Of course, a well written scene is always appreciated. But the very basis of a good scene is the characters driving it. For real.

For real!!!

Key points: pay attention to word choice, determine whether you want to show, or tell, and finally, characters are the basis of all things good and prosperous!


leaked 4x13 scene

Bellamy: *is under a high stress life and death situation* y'all mind if I-
Clarke: mind if you wha-
Bellamy: -have difficulty expressing my emotions especially to those I love due to having a large amount of pressure and responsibility placed upon me in many situations involving my loved ones from a young age

anonymous asked:

Hi! I really love your art and the fact that you post so often is amazing. How do you manage to keep being inspired and draw so much? I try to draw as much as I can that but my family situation doesn't allow me to stay chill more that, lmao, a couple of hours a day basically.

Oh hey!! Thank you so much, I’m glad you like my stuff!

It probably doesn’t show but I struggle a lot with posting on this blog often. I get ‘inspired’ to draw the most after brainstorming with my pals. We think about situations that would be funny with certain characters, puns and all that stuff. Even the captions! A good slice of the drawings I post have some kind of input from someone else, and that can really make you feel more invested in what you’re doing!

I find it nearly impossible to just…draw a character without having in mind what I wanna do so honestly I’d really recommend talking with friends about ideas.
They don’t have to be great, they can even be plain like:
“Sasuke can’t open water bottles in the ending because no arm” or “Lapis hugging people with her wings” and so on. And with a list of things you wanna draw you’ll never run out of ideas!

Draw Your OTP/Squad bases also are fun when you’re feeling completely uninspired.

Having a blog is good to keep you motivated in updating it but don’t let it become a chore! It’s ok if you don’t post for weeks, I do that too.

Regarding my family situation, while I prefer not to talk about it in detail atm, I don’t have a supportive family when it comes to my ambitions and what I wanna do in life, however these tips also help me going through that!

Good luck!


Qrow’s reaction to finding a tattoo of his emblem on your body

Relationship: Lovers

Fandom: RWBY

Character: Qrow

It was his emblem; big enough to fit on your left wrist. Normally hidden behind layers of bracelets not out of shame; never out of shame. You just enjoyed wearing bracelets. You never had shown him before, it hadn’t ever crossed your mind to bring it up to him; since time with Qrow always seemed too limited. You just wanted to spend enough time with him so you could have something to fall back on when he was away.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Character meme for Harada and / or Kazama, please? ^w^

Since I just did Kazama, here’s Harada! But he’s not one of the characters I have a lot of experience writing, so this is more what I try to keep in mind than what other people should keep in mind.

  1. He has a temper. Yeah, he’s ordinarily the levelheaded ‘big brother’ type, but any man who literally tries to kill himself to prove a point—even if he’s cooled off since then—has a major temper. I mean, he punches Heisuke to keep him quiet, roughs up Souma the first time you see him, and is 100% Ready to Fight at most points in time. He’s gallant and easygoing, but he’s not exactly an angel. To his credit, he knows that.
  2. He’s part of the Idiot Trio for a reason. He may be more mature than the other two, but he will still slack off and goof around given the chance. Too often, I slip into writing him as mediator and chaperone instead of willing participant, which he most definitely is. I mean, there is that scene in Shimabara, and he does dance naked if he gets carried away. He’s still very much a kid himself, sometimes.
  3. He isn’t good with subtext. Since he is more observant than Nagakura and Heisuke, not that that’s saying much, I have a habit of forgetting that he’s oblivious in his own way, too. Verbal cues go over his head, and he isn’t good with words either, to the point that he’d rather wait and hope than tell Chizuru how he feels (possibly for fear of messing up somehow?). Even though he’s sharp and street-smart, there are still a few things he just doesn’t pick up on. Subtext is one of them.
I just got called out for "throwing a tantrum"

This was regarding Rowena.




Rowena was/is my favorite character and of COURSE I am going to be upset when a character that I have grown SO attached to is killed for no reason, offscreen mind you. YES I’m going to be mad when there’s a chance an actor I have grown to love so much won’t be on my screen. How most of you feel about Sam and Dean is exactly how I feel about Rowena. The crushes you have on Jared and Jensen, I have on Ruth. “You’re being too dramatic to stop watching.” Well fuck yeah I’m going to stop watching when a huge reason why I love the show is gone. I get it, people on SPN die all the time, but what was the reason for killing her like THAT? There wasn’t even a fight. Rowena’s story had room for SO much more development. There are SO many unanswered, untouched things between her and Crowley. I obviously don’t know the writers plans or what happened behind the scenes, and frankly I don’t really care. All I know is she is a huge reason as to why I continue watching and unless she comes back, I won’t.

anonymous asked:

I remember that you said that you don't like furries but in the same time you like other "monsters" and demons. Wtf?

The answer is simple anon. I don’t like furries becuse they have fur and animal faces. (You know, when somethig has face of dog, my brain treats it as a dog).

Some of monsters and demons are interesting to me, depends of their design. They do not look like humans or human-likely but also not like anything what I know from our world like an animal. I don’t mind about tails, horns, fangs and claws as long as they don’t make character looking like an animal.

As long as demon/monster is original design and look more like humanoid (or totally new race) than an animal, I like them.

Here you have one of my “monsters”, just in case.

anonymous asked:

How did you get into dnd? ...Also how do you play it? I tried to learn but the guy teaching me was bein a butt. "How do you NOT KNOW THIS" and stuff.

honestly I got super interested in DND actually by listening to The Adventure Zone

then the more i learned about DND, the more I realized this was. literally right up my alley. like. its literally playing a game while roleplaying a character with other people and their characters and we develop a story and see how it all unfolds and all that whimsical shit?

like its literally everything i’ve ever wanted LOL

i will say though, learning about everything there is to know about DND can take. hours. honestly the BEST way to learn how to play DnD is to show up to your sessions with an open mind, and a patient DM with a friendly group and honestly its just way easier to explain everything as you’re actually going through everything step by step

it took me a few sessions to get into the swing of things! but if you’re just That curious theres so many resources online you can look into that can go into depth and break it down for ya.

insomniacapples  asked:

1, 3 and 10 please?

1. Describe yourself how you would describe a character you’re introducing

She sat perched at her desk, fingers flying across the keyboards as the words flooded her mind, desperately needing to make their permanence known. She tossed her long, black hair over her shoulder and narrowed her almond eyes as they set in determination. She sipped at her mug of tea, worrying her plump lower lip between her teeth and got to work. It was going to be a long night.

3. What is your absolute favorite kind of fic to write?

I love love love writing just cute little romantic fluffy moments, so anything like that is just the best. Also, first kisses. AHH. I love romance.

10. What inspires you the most?

Other people! I love reading other people’s stuff and thinking about how I can improve. I love reading stories that have strong visual cues where I’m able to imagine it as a movie playing in my head. I always want to be able to do that with my writing as well.

I know most of us love Isak to another level, I do too. But hate on Sana just because she told him “that you’re alone”, you need to understand where she is coming from, she trusted a group of people and let her soft side show - all it ended up coming to bite her in the ass.

She feels betrayed and realised that being soft, only leads to her being bullied all over again.

We all love Isak, because we have seen his character development, but to Sana he is just a close friend. So keep that in mind, when you say ‘how can Sana be cruel to my baby’

anonymous asked:

I have lost sleep over how good love potion no. 5 is. I'm serious. I have not read a fix that good in years that made me keep reading it. I mostly kept going over still because nice been out of reading since high school so my mind can't always keep track of where I am but I remember everything and I love it. Everyone save for Keith is spot on unlike most stuff I've read where it's not or just Tumblr voltron. They all sound true to their characters. Amazing talented beautiful brilliant

!!!! AH! THANK YOU SO MUCH!! This is a very thoughtful comment on it!! It’s hilarious that so many people have been enjoying it because it’s been such a wild ride and honestly, sometimes I wonder if it’s even that good lol

Haha! “Save for Keith” well you’re not wrong there! LOLOL This really revs me up, thank you! :D 

anonymous asked:

What kind of relationships would you like to see Jekyll develop? I've seen you post about wanting more platonic things... do you have anything you specifically want?


honestly, i know i keep harping on it and people must be sick of it by now, but i really want friends his own age??? there are almost no characters in rp over 40, let alone over 50, and that gets really, insanely frustrating. jekyll really isn’t the sort to be close friends with someone 20 or 30 years younger than him — he’ll be polite to them, he might enjoy chatting with them, but they’re never gonna be ‘friends,’ in his mind. it’s just… too much of a gap. he finds it weird. and i end up feeling like i’m missing out on a lot, because jekyll is the sort to have a lot of friends his age, i just… never get to explore that because every single rp character, with the exception of a tiny handful, is under 40 — usually under 35. no one wants to make older characters, which leaves me feeling like i can’t develop a lot of close platonic relationships with him. he’s 52 years old — he doesn’t dislike younger people, but he’s really not gonna hang out with them like they’re his best pals. 

that’s the thing i want most. just… friendships with people closer to his own age. beyond that, though, uh… i dunno. i feel like i’ve just gotten a bit tired of mentor plots or pseudofamilial plots because that’s all i get to do. i just really, really want friendships with people his age.

Writing Update: 5/22/17

Hours Editing: 2

Favorite Line: Niko was in his mid-sixties, physically, and his hair still felt silky smooth. Mine looked and felt like a man in his eighties, all coarse and brittle and silver white. It was not fair, let me tell you. 

Update: So today I finished my first read through of Part One!! Yay!! I changed a whole heck of a lot, which is good, although I suspect I just made more work for myself. Tomorrow I’m going to take a break from editing and write something new. Nothing big, just a short story that’s been on my mind for a while. Maybe I’ll try doing a writing exercise with my characters or something, just to shake things up and keep me on my creative toes and all. I’ve also somehow have to fit in reading a friend’s novel, reading a book on editing I bought, making an outline for a school essay, working on a final project, all while in a crappy mental state. 

I’m not busy at all… But I’ll find time! I always do!! Wish me luck, though, ‘cus I need it!

itspileofgoodthings  asked:

1, 14, 48 for the writer ask game

1. Things that inspire me

Memories that I keep folded away in my mind like pages in a book–memories of places, senses, feelings that I try to incorporate into my work to develop a sense of setting. People who are interesting and complicated and loyal, something I like to explore in character.

14. Easiest character to write

For Fixing on the Hour, since I just finished it–woohoo! I have to say that Darcy was obviously pretty easy to write because she’s like me. Even though her scenes were shorter (reflecting, at least as I intended, the fact that P & P is from Elizabeth’s perspective), I could get into her head easily and she was a natural extension of my own feelings and reactions to things. However, Bing is also very easy to write! I just have a sense for what she would say and do and it always feels very free and light.

48. Three spoilers for Fixing on the Hour

  1. Levi finishes college.
  2. Fitz looks for his birth parents.
  3. It’s getting a sequel. ;)

carbonfiberpersonality  asked:

I'm very curious about how you would draw modern Les mis characters as refugees in the conflict in Ukraine, or in Syria. I've always believed either would be a great setting for a modern take on the story, perhaps with Javert as a zealous GRU or CIA officer who spent years hunting a man he believed to be a terrorist but who it turns out was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I don't know, maybe some fun ideas to toy with 😄❤

guys!!!! please appreciate this great idea of a brilliant mind
@carbonfiberpersonality you are a gem 💎

iwasapruneratfaverolles  asked:


Grace fuck, why would you invoke her name like that???

Okay, fine, gather round children, buckle up because we’re going on a bumpy ride back to everyone’s collective least favorite place: 7th grade.

Some background: I went to a very small Catholic school. One class per grade (we were the largest with 19 kids), everyone knew each other whether they wanted to or not. Despite basically every teacher and faculty members insistence that we were The Best And Most Special Class In The School and that everyone loved having us, the longstanding 7th grade teacher Mrs. O’Hara decided to retire in the summer of 2008, meaning the school had to find us a new teacher for the upcoming year. This would be like, the first new teacher in the school in a while, and as she was getting the ‘best class’, it was viewed as a Big Deal. Somewhere in like July or August we got a letter announcing Mrs. Stubel, and it came with a list of books to pick for the summer reading, and that was basically all the information we had.

So…the first day of class. She seems nice enough. Very…ditsy, I guess? It was very easy for her to get herself off topic while talking. She constantly paced around the room, never staying in one spot for longer than a second, complaining she has restless leg syndrome. Which like, I’m sure she did, but she was in the middle of introducing herself and then went on a 20 minute tangent about restless leg syndrome without anyone prompting her. It was almost like you could see her scattered thoughts flying around her head.

So anyone, she eventually gives somewhat of an introduction- she had only taught in public schools before, and kept worrying she ‘didn’t know’ how to teach in a Catholic school despite the entire class insisting literally nothing was different, you just teach the curriculum, twice a week we have religion class with Sister Mary King, that’s literally it (she still talked over us in worry), she told us about her kids, she told us about her obsession with Emily Dickinson, stuff like that.

And then she hands us this worksheet.

She’s like, “Oh, these are just some basic questions for you to answer! Just so I can get to know you guys better!” like in lieu of an icebreaker game, which is fine, but…the questions. The questions were all “What is your most haunting fear?”, “What is your deepest regret?”, “Have you ever experienced the pain of loss?”, “What was your worst injury?”, “What was your worst nightmare?”, all questions like that, and then on the back she wanted us to draw a gravestone and write out what we wanted our epitaph to be.

We were twelve year olds, mind you.

Oh my God and one girl missed the first day because of her grandmother’s funeral, so when she came the next day and saw what the teacher was insisting she do for homework, she almost had a panic attack? And the lady still made her do it? Literally who wants to think about death anymore at a time like that omfg.

Okay, so then we get to the summer reading book reports, right? Now, she had given a list of maybe, 20 books that you could pick from, read it, and then present an oral report on it. You had to have notecards and you had to be able to answer questions from the class at the end. All in all, I’ve had worse projects.

So, on this list, she apparently put Madeleine L’Engle’s entire book series on the list…only she did not make it known that this was a series and not multiple stand alone books, so when reports started up it caused mass-panic of kids trying to put together plot points and make connections on what the hell they had read.

I was the only kid in the class who had chosen to read “A Wrinkle In Time”, and that has since lead to a series of events that…really actually scares me, I’m still incredibly freaked out, I’m not going to get into it right now because it’ll take away from the current story, but just know that I’m not above wondering if it only happened because I read the book for Stubel.

Anyway, so like, I got through the report okay. The class asking questions about it was fine, but the teacher kept asking questions that didn’t make sense, like, at all. My friend Angie has always had super neat handwriting and Mrs. Stubel got like, obsessed with her notecards and asked if she could borrow them for something. When we got our grades back a few weeks later, Angie had points taken off for not having notecards.

And then her teaching just…didn’t happen. She’d never stay on a topic, she’d always get herself distracted! We were not learning anything. And like, this wasn’t a class of advanced smart kids that loved to learn. By all accounts we should’ve been thrilled. But it got out of hand. It got to points where we had to start teaching lessons to ourselves, asking teacher from other grades for help, always coming home in tears, complaining constantly to our parents and the principal because this woman wasn’t teaching us anything. There were two kids who asked her multiple times for extra help, and she told them each time to ‘talk to me after school’, but then she’d leave immediately after school so they wouldn’t be able to talk to her. They finally brought up the issue in the middle of class and she had a breakdown, yelling about how nobody ever thinks that maybe the teacher has a lot of work to do, and maybe she’s entitled to taking off early, but when we tried to argue she shouldn’t schedule meetings and then break them off in the name of relaxation, she stormed out of the room and tried to get the principal to give us detention. (Which, like, our school didn’t even do, and she was the only one in the wrong during this situation) We are still in September at this point, and already at least ten kids have parents considering transferring them to another school. (And remember, there was only 19 of us, and most of the class had been together since preschool, so that was a big deal).

Then, she starts coming in with all the weird bruises. All the Moms™ immediately started gossiping that her husband had to be beating her, and that’s why she was so screwy in the head. But the way she talked about her husband made it seem like he *might* be dead, and we actually did witness her fall and smack her head into a doorknob once, so no one really knew what to believe. (Also, I’m not trying to imply that abuse would make someone crazy or ‘damaged’ or anything, this is just what was being said. I think they were trying to turn her into a more sympathetic character, because if you feel sorry for her you don’t have to hate her for frustrating your kids so much, and Hate Is A Bad Emotion.)

Also…this woman and Emily Dickinson.

She talked about Emily Dickinson every chance she could get. None of us knew who Emily Dickinson really was before she got there and you could see in her mind it was a capitol offense. She found out the curriculum didn’t have room to cover her (because like, we had a text book), and was way too upset about it. She started reading her poems whenever she found the time (usually somewhere in history class), and always gave us very detailed accounts about her dressing up as Emily and reading her poetry at the library.

Now, two things to note here:

  1. The library did not hire her to do this. She would literally just get in the mood, put on an Emily Dickinson costume that she made by herself, drive to different libraries, and just read poetry out loud to everyone there until someone eventually asked her to leave.
  2. The way she described these events…her tone, the look on her face, her posture…you could just tell that she was getting some sort of sexual gratification out of this? Like dressing up as Emily Dickinson in public and reading her sad poems is really what got this lady’s jollies rocking? Got her all hot and bothered? Which is…a lot, but why would you tell a bunch of seventh graders about it holy shit. What about that sounds like a good idea! What about that turns you back on!

So anyway, we learned a lot about Emily Dickinson against our will.

One of the Davids™ was reading a book for pleasure- which shouldn’t have been a shocker, a lot of kids always had books on them, but Stubel got really interested and asked if she could borrow it from him. He was like ‘sure, after I finish it?’ but she took it that day. He asked her for it back for like five weeks straight.

And…the strudels.

Okay, so the school was trying some dorky thing to promote ~togetherness~ or some virtue or something, I don’t remember the specifics of why, but each class had to make a huge themed poster and hang it on the wall outside the classroom. Which was like, whatever, not the most thrilling project but at least it allowed us to be productive vs just sitting there as the teacher runs about the room rambling about her family vacation from four years ago. Mrs. Stubel decided we needed a quirky nickname and after like three days of deliberation we were christened “Stubel’s Special Strudels”!

(points for alliteration or whatever, but no one actually voted for that and what exactly do strudels have to do with Catholicism? It became a big running joke amongst the kids)

Also, in case you were wondering, she didn’t explain the assignment correctly to us- so every other class had like these beautiful, artistic, well-themed and put together posters, while ours was just…literally a bunch of shit thrown together on paper. Nothing fit with each other, it was literally embarrassing to look at.

But then…she wouldn’t drop the strudel thing. Like she kept bringing it up. She got really into strudels and would just tell us random shit about them. Finally, someone jokes that we should get strudels one day for a party (like instead of a pizza party), and she’s Freaking Out and On Board. She really wants to buy us strudels and have a breakfast party now. She talked about it for like two days straight.

So like… you know in school when you would have a pizza party, usually the teacher would buy it? That’s how they always happened in my experience (not counting the last day of 10th grade when some kid had pizza delivered to the school for lunch but it didn’t get there until math class lol). But especially in grade school? Like if it wasn’t a PTA made party that’s super organized, the school would buy the food, right? Right?

Yeah, so she was like, if this is happening you guys need to give me the money. Just give me the money and then I’ll pick them up on my way to work!! And after some arguing some kids are on board. Strudels should only cost a couple dollars right?

And she’s like, oh no, I’m gonna get them from this high end bakery near my house so it’ll be special, but they’re not cheap and it’ll be a big order! I’m gonna need like fifteen dollars from each of you!

And at this point I’m just like…lady. Come on. 

But she keeps insisting. She’s not gonna go until every student in class pays up.

And I’m like…I’m poor. I don’t even like strudel.  And some of the less-naïve kids are siding with me.

And then she pulls that “you guys are just spoiling all the fun for your classmates” shit, like the naïve kids who already paid up, so it gets to the point where we just gotta cave and give her the money.

(I ended up stealing it out of my Crazy Bitch Aunt’s wallet so it’s whatever, I guess.)

And then of course, shockingly enough, every morning she was met with “where are the strudels?” and every morning she went wide eyed, slapped her forehead and yelled in embarrassed horror “I totally forgot! Tomorrow, guys, I promise!”

Honestly, with how scatterbrained and confused she always was…like to this day I can’t tell you with 100% certainty whether she hustled us or was just actually forgetting about the damn pastries, I choose to lean towards the hustled us side because that’s just the type of people I’m used to, but if I found out it was innocent forgetfulness I wouldn’t exactly be surprised.

She couldn’t handle more than one person talking at a time. Like, we’d have break periods, or group work, or something and all the talking made her go wide-eyed and batty. She’d look overworked and anxious and would be darting around the room trying to do work or something but she couldn’t focus and she’d yell at anyone who tried to talk to her directly. I remember one time she was using this boys desk for something so he asked “where am I supposed to sit?” and she snapped “Sit on the ceiling for all I care!”. And this kid was the Class Clown™ , so he immediately grabbed a chair in one hand and started climbing the bookcase to try and reach the ceiling. She’s standing right next to this and doesn’t even notice. He got all four chair legs planted on the ceiling and was trying to somehow maneuver his way into the chair (I really don’t know what the plan was exactly- he was really tall and it was a small building, so I think he probably had the idea that if he can get his body upside down and in the chair, and stretch out his arms like a hand-stand to hold onto bookcase, he could arguably sit on the ceiling.) but he slipped. Crashed into my desk and the two desks next to me, knocked over the book case, broke the chair in half and hit the desks with enough force to knock them down lower. It was hilarious. Everyone was loosing their shit cracking up (he was fine) and it still took Stubel like five minutes to notice his lying out across the desks right in front of her eyes. She was pissed but how did she miss any of it in the first place? She was barely being helpful in whatever it was she was trying to do.

This was the year the Phillies were going to the World Series, and all the grades were having a Phillies Rally in the cafeteria so a news crew was coming to the school and each class was supposed to come up with fun little cheers for them to broadcast. Multiple cheer ideas were presented to her and she vetoed all of them, someone even suggested just singing the damn eagles theme song with replaced words and calling it a day but she vetoed that too, she was very adamant that she could come up with a cheer all by herself and it’ll be the best one (whoever had the best cheer was winning like an ice cream day or something idk). And then like…literally five minutes before the rally she just hands us signs with the letters and was like ‘we’re just gonna spell out Phillies it will be cute won’t it my strudels???’. We were the weakest class there, predictably. I think we lost to the kindergarteners. There might still be a video online of me yelling “ i “ passionately at the top of my lungs. It was online bc our cheer was so bland the news crew cut it out of the broadcast.

I literally can’t say enough about how she never taught us anything. She’d be going on some tangent about how she doesn’t understand the science behind skiing, and I’d be like “Okay yes but please can you just tell me where Romania is on a map???” And she’d start fights whenever someone actually wanted to learn. It was so easy to get her angry but so hard for her to stay on topic. Kids started teaching the class themselves! Like seriously, she’d be rambling and one of us would just go up to the podium, open the teacher’s guide textbook and just start reading out loud and talking over her. By the time she noticed we’d be halfway through a lesson. And we understood it better than when she tried! You know something’s wrong when pre-teens are more qualified for a job than an adult who supposedly went to school for this.

We were in the church having run-throughs for our upcoming Confirmation and she almost set the church on fire…fifteen different times. In less than half an hour. How hard is it to hold a candle?

Okay, and here’s when stuff starts kicking up. It was October 28th, a Tuesday, and it was our last day of school that week because they were having parent-teacher conferences the rest of the week. So we were just hanging out, watching movies in class and reading (lord knows we weren’t learning), and Stubel calls me over to her desk.

So like, she had given everyone little bags with candy for Halloween, but I get up there and she hands me an extra one. And she’s like “Molly I know your birthday is tomorrow and I bought you a present but I left it on my coffee table this morning by accident! So just have the candy for now!”

And I’m like….”Ma’am I’m like, the sixth birthday this year. You didn’t give anyone else presents?”

And she goes “Oh, I know but this is a special secret surprise. I just know you’re gonna love it! Do you wanna stop by my house later this week to pick it up or should I just give it to you Monday after school?”

And like…In writing this sounds like a non-threatening exchange, and like, it was, but I felt so uncomfortable holy shit. I’m looking over my shoulder and shooting my friends SOS signals. Something about this felt so weird in my gut omfg. I told her thanks and I’d just see her Monday.

So we flash forward to Wednesday- my 13th birthday, the day the Phillies won the world series, and also the day my mother innocently strolled into the school for her meeting only to be met with screaming, the sound of heavy destruction, and the school secretary Mrs. Daily running at her in a panic, waving her arms and yelling “YOUR MEETING IS CANCELLED YOUR MEETING IS CANCELLED GET IN MY OFFICE NOW!”

So my poor mother, who thought she could handle this whole meeting in a few minutes and barely be an hour late for work, is now barricaded in the front office with the school secretary, as the noises from down the hall get louder and louder. The woman explains that they had gotten so many complaints about Mrs. Stubel that this morning, when she got to the school, the principal Sister Patricia called her in and said “Listen, we need you to be professional and still have the parent conferences, but we have to let you go. We just don’t think you fit in well here, and the kids need to come first and feel comfortable in their school.” and like, I’m paraphrasing because I wasn’t there, but we all know she was very polite and professional about it.

Mrs. Stubel, however…was not.

She flipped her chair and stormed out of the office, and locks herself in the seventh grade classroom. She started wrecking the shit out of that place, screaming obscenities and the top of her lungs, they had to call the cops on her! She was locked in there for almost an hour! And let me just give you a nice little list of everything she did in that classroom:

  • Smashed three windows.
  • Threw everything off her desk and carved swear words all over it.
  • Got cleaning fluid that she knew would damage the chalk boards, smeared it all over.
  • Cracked the chalk boards by repeatedly smashing chairs against them.
  • Wrote swear words all over the walls and on desks
  • Went into students desks, ripped up their books.
  • Stole my glasses. (which were in my desk bc I only used them in class at the time)
  • Threw some desks around.
  • Carved swear words into the boards. (there was so much carving I’m assuming she just had a knife on her person, which has to lead to the question, did she have a knife on her while she was in class with us?)
  • Physically ripped the hooks to hang backpacks on out of the wall.
  • Knocked the closet door off it’s hinges.
  • Ripped up all the books in the bookcases and threw their pages all around the room.
  • Wrote lewd phrases inside student’s desks.
  • Broke multiple chairs.
  • Used her podium as a battering ram against the wall that’s in front of where the backpacks go. (the wall won but Damage Was Inflicted)
  • Set a fire in the trash can.
  • When the principal and other teachers started trying to get in, she tossed her rolling chair at the door to scare them off.
  • She was screaming curse words at the top of her lungs the entire time, and cursing the school and the kids and the principal and the church in general, and the school building was small, so all the parents and the smaller children that had to come to the meetings (who were locked in their respective classrooms in fear) heard everything.
  • So much more? But it’s 4:30 in this morning and this list is already long.

So my mom is in the front office and deadass the

entire police force

shows up, running down the hallway to the classroom yelling at her to stop, and it takes a while for them to get her out holy shit. They knocked down the door and she tried to escape out of one of the broken windows! But they got her and dragged her out.

So of course, in such a small school with very involved parents this shit spread like wildfire. The entire town knew within the day. The poor principal called the newly retired old-seventh grade teacher and was like “So we…need some help” and the lady was like “I already heard I’ll be there Monday” omfg. I remember I got a text from one of my classmates saying “if your birthday wish was for us to be set free from the beast I love you” omfg.

So, we eventually go back to school on Monday and everyone’s buzzing. The principal has us go to the cafeteria and she ‘delicately’ explains the situation, and that the old teacher is coming out of retirement for us, the school has a restraining order against Mrs. Stubel now and that she’s sorry we had to deal with this mess. Our classroom had to go under some heavy reconstruction before we could be let back in there, so for like two weeks we alternated between the cafeteria and the preschooler’s classroom, we had no books or anything, just provided loose-leaf paper and pens. It was like, surreal, but everyone was just so happy to be rid of her and to be in the presence of a competent teacher omfg. We eventually were able to get back into our usual classroom.

  1. It took a while for things to go completely back to normal, though. After the big spectacle she made, for weeks after she was fired we were all very scared of the possibility of Mrs. Stubel returning to the school with a gun in hand. It was always a topic we whispered about at lunch with wide eyes and shivers. Like…genuine nightmare scenario.
  2. About two weeks after she was fired, a boy in the back of the classroom gasped loudly during SSR, and when we all looked at him, he whispered in anger “She never gave us our freakin’ strudels!”
  3. About three months after she was fired, we were lined up at the door to go to Library when a few of us looked through the windows and saw something darting through the trees. It was fast and we couldn’t make anything out, so we let it drop. When the class and teacher returned half and hour later, the book she had borrowed months before from one of the boys was sitting on his desk. It was just laying there, the room was silent, nothing had been disturbed…but I have never seen a book look so threatening. People were freaking out. Someone kept insisting that she turned the book into a bomb. No one figure out how she got in the school, and no one could figure out how she got it on the right desk, as we had switched the seating arrangement since she had last been there.  
  4. A full six months after she had left, it was nearing the end of the school year and our class was dicking around during our last computer class. Someone found a website (that we weren’t allowed to be on) that pulls up any police records attached to whoever’s name you enter, so someone decided to search Mrs. Stubel as a joke. We ended up finding out she had like six DUI’s.

Aaaaand that’s the story of the horrendous teacher I had for two months in 7th grade. One of my favorite party stories but tbh she still haunts me™ .