not going to say it's ugly cuz i always say this

Opinion

Hey, sinces everybody here always give their thoughts about tyren, I thought I would give mine too, (sorry if I get a bit disrespectful Nikki)
Since the beginning this Tyren shit started, I always thought it was PR. Why? (Its no because I’m a delusional camren shipper)
Simple, because 1) if it was a real relationship, believe me management would’ve shot that shit down immediately, because it’s giving Lauren a real bad image. Their client is losing fans and people are calling her fake and all kind of shit.(hence why she had to close the comment section on her pic with ty at N’s birthday party, people were dragging her to hell and back, and it wasn’t just fans, believe me, I spent a whole day discussing with some people, that aren’t fans, trying to defend her, but I couldn’t give my 100% cuz at the end of the day she is still “with ty”) If it was a real relationship they would’ve made Lauren keep it as low key as possible (just like they did with Camren)
2) Lauren is a private girl. She’s always said this. She HATES when people are all up her business. What makes you think she would willingly show off this new ‘relationship’ that clearly leaves her on an ugly light. Why isn’t she ranting like she always does for people making assumptions about her ‘love life’? It’s like you guys dont know Lauren. The Lauren that I’ve known since early 2014 would’ve dragged y'all asses by now. And y'all may think Lauren is too truthful and she wouldn’t agree to be on a PR, but guess what, she has contracts. She’s not in control of her public image.
3) the posts. Lmao I crack up with how obvious they are sometimes. First you have Ty tweeting all kind of creepy shit, then you get Lauren liking his “8 more days” tweet, getting people’s attention, we were all counting those 8 days, and BAM we get a video of them on a bowling alley 8 days later. then we have our very private girl, Lauren, posting instastories letting us know she’s with ty (concerts, dogs, etc) and what’s even funnier  is the fact that they’ve both posted shit to make us think they’re together when they’re not (poor Leo ) it was proven that Leo was in Miami when tyren posted that pic of leo on the couch.
4) Jamaican me crazy 'ayeee’… to me, this birthday get away gave it away! First Lauren went MIA for like 2 day, ( C too btw but let’s not go there, this ain’t about camren)While Ty went clubbing the whole weekend, I saw videos of him at strip clubs with all kind of hoes all over him… On Monday we get Mr ty dolla $ign going live on IG (like always ) letting us know that he was on his way to Jamaica, with his photographer to meet up with someone. Huh. Weird right? (Btw he’s always giving hints about meeting up with Lauren on his IG lives, what’s the need?) And then around 1hour later we get Alexa and L’s uncle posting Jamaica instastories/post. Lauren must be there too, right? And what’s funnier is the fact that there were only Lauren closets friends on that trip. Her Miami friends. so what the hell is Tara (her artist manager/SM manager/part of her PR team) doing there? they’re not close,they only hang out when it come to work. You can guess why she was there.
Lastly, you all might say “but what’s the benefit? They’re not getting any headlines or anything (they are, btw, look them up on google)” well, I don’t know whats the purpose of this “relationship” it might be a distraction, It might benefit ty (he’s gaining a lot of followers) it might be to prove that Lauren is in fact bi since she previously  came out as bi while “dating” her bff. What I know is, if Management wasn’t using this stunt for their benefits, they wouldn’t be shoving this down our throats. They would’ve shoot that down. This isnt good for lauren…You guys might say “maybe he’s changed because of lauren” (he’s awful, guys, he looked sweet around the girls and shit, but this dude is an asshole, he disrespect women, he used them for his own pleasure) but if he hasn’t changed for the sake of his mom, sister, and his 12 YEARS OLD DAUGHTER!!! What makes you think he’s gonna change for a 21 years old girl whose he’s only been having a"fling" for around ¾ months?… I’m out.
(I’m sorry for my grammar, English is not my first language)

Submission by @black-n-white-dreamers
Boyfriend!Kim Donghyun

Author’s Note: aaaa im really sorry for not uploading for so long!! im trying to finish even more summer work that i have for my honors classes this year and i need to finish them before band camp starts ( very grueling practices for a week eugg ) im gonna try to finish a couple requests in bulletpoint form because it takes a long time for me to do my usual writings!! 

later on in the day: my fucking thigh somehow unlocked the thing that kept my laptop battery in and it turned my laptop off so i lost a lot of the things that i wrote down hhhhhh im actually so angry bcuz i lost so much but whatever 

Originally posted by hitoritabi

kim donghyun as your boyfriend (mainly the things that led up to it lol)

  • you met through a project in middle school that you had to do which required pairs
  • the teacher didn’t let the class choose their partners and had randomly assigned people together
  • wow how convenient you got kim donghyun as your partner 
  • you knew he existed because he was generally outgoing towards people so he was friends with alot of people but you never really talked to him before
  • it was easy to feel comfy around him because of his personality and you saw why so many people were friends with him (cuz hes a sweetheart duh)
  • you guys started researching things at the library which ended quickly because you were too loud
  • donghyun would somehow make a bunch of bad jokes while you were researching for the project (which was funny because yaknow middle school humor) and you two would burst out laughing
  • the librarian kicked you out lol
  • you decided to go to your house to continue the research and youe parents were surprised to see you bring a boy home with you
  • donghyun was very polite to your parents and greeted them with his bright smile
  • obv your parents questioned if he was your boyfriend but you had to explain that he was your partner for a project (plus you just met so you didn’t really think about that)
  • doing the project was actually a lot of fun with donghyun because of his bad jokes and not sounding boring whenever he was reading out the information
  • throughout the week, he would come over to your house to finish the project since it was a bad idea to go back to the library
  • your parents grew to like him and treated him as if he was their own son (but they were highkey shipping you two bcuz awww)
  • fast forward to the day where you need to present your project to the class 
  • you felt a little nervous because you didn’t like speaking in front of the class much but donghyun lifted your mood and joked around with you
  • the presentation was fun for the class too, donghyun making some bad puns and jokes throughout it making some of the classmates laugh or groan at
  • regardless, you received full points on the project which made the two of you really happy since you basically worked all week on it
  • even after the project, you guys started hanging out with each other 
  • whenever you would be in the same classes the following years, you were relieved to have your best friend there (aka donghyun)
  • people would often mistake you as a couple since you were so close 
  • the both of you denied it because at the time you only saw each other like family (yall are still young dating doesnt come to mind)
  • you often see donghyun being confessed to during school and tbh you didnt know how to feel about it?
  • mainly “its none of my business whatever” but you would still tease him about it later
  • like when valentines day came around, you would see donghyun coming up to you holding a shit ton of chocolates and you would have to help him carry them home
  • “you’re gonna get fat because all of the chocolates you get every year”
  • “that’s why i’ll give some of them to you so you can get fat with me”
  • “wowwww way to throw away those girl’s feelings onto me donghyun”
  • the ugly face competition at each other begins and ends quickly because donghyun would always win at making the ugliest faces
  • this scene highkey sounds cliche but whatever lol
  • since he was popular as mentioned with the hundreds of chocolates he would get for valentines day, the girls in your school obv knew how close you were to him and would get jealous
  • some of them would be petty jealous to the point where they would mess with you (just cuz u were friends with him) 
  • it would start with not being able to find your books that you needed for class
  • they would either be in some trash can or thrown out of the window and into some bushes
  • donghyun would see you stress out trying to find your books and even spots you fishing one out of the trash
  • “y/n what happened?? why is your english book in the trash?”
  • cue the upset but annoyed face “its probably one of your fangirls again” 
  • youre dusting off the book and looking at the pages that were messed up with a clearly irritated face
  • donghyun feels bad bcuz what you said was probably right and he scratches the back of his head since the situation felt tense
  • you knew it really wasnt his fault but you felt super bothered that they had to interfere with your life 
  • this happened occasionally and you felt like you had to distance yourself from donghyun a little during school because of it
  • he noticed you were distancing yourself and he was getting sad (who wouldnt be sad if ur best friend was slowly drifting away from you smh)
  • over text message
    • dh: y/n??? have you been ignoring my messages?
    • y/n: oh sorry i was doing homework (obv a lie)
    • dh: i know that’s a lie since when do you not do hw last minute 
    • y/n: idk i just felt like doing it? what’s it to you
    • dh: y/n i’ve known you since middle school this isn’t like you 
    • dh: i know you’ve been lying the past couple weeks just talk to me already :(
  • was i that obvious?” you thought looking at his text and felt guilty 
    • y/n: well i dont want to get in the way of your life
    • dh: get in the way??? what do you mean
    • y/n: i mean all of those girls that like you
    • y/n: plus some of them have taken a step up to even bully me because im around you so much and i feel bad about it
    • dh: y/n you shouldn’t have to feel bad about that… i acknowledge that they like me but that shouldn’t stop you from being my best friend
  • you felt sort of a pang in your chest because your actions made him upset
    • dh: if you ever feel like this again you need to come talk to me okay? i dont like seeing you upset.
    • y/n: dkjkjjdhaas what did i do to deserve a friend like you >;((((
    • dh: cuz you earned my heart over the years ,’;))))))
    • y/n: lmao ew dont say it like that thats gross
    • dh: im just saying the truth y/n 
    • y/n: yeah yeah whatever. since you knew i lied about doing hw come over with snacks cuz i was actually watching netflix lol
    • dh: alright lol
  • it takes like 10 min for him to get snacks at the convenient store and to your house 
  • btw its the weekend so no worries about school lol
  • he gets to your room places the snacks on the table you set up in front of your bed
  • an idea pops up in your head and you turned to donghyun with an excited expression
  • “lets make a fort”
  • he has that wide smile and quickly runs to the hallway closet where you guys kept your extra blankets and pillows (your house was basically his second home so he knew where everything was lol)
  • using the thin blankets to make the cover of the fort and stacking the pillows to prop the blankets up
  • it takes like 20 min but its totally worth it
  • you’re both under the fort with the snacks on the table that you pushed up against the bed and turning on netflix on your laptop
  • you’re on your 3rd movie and you start to feel drowsy
  • all the snacks you ate made you full and the warmth of the blankets and pillows you were snuggled up with made you sleepy
  • donghyun was paying attention to the movie still while you were slowly drifting off to sleep, your head resting on the folded pillow that you were using to prop your head up when you were watching the movie
  • he turned to you to make a witty comment about the movie like he usually does but he stopped his sentence when he saw you passed out next to him
  • he smiles seeing your cheek squished up against the pillow which made your lips pout a little
  • he grabs his phone next to him and snaps a couple pics for himself and stares at your peaceful sleeping face before turning to put the laptop away tbh this happens a lot so he has a lot of secret pics of you how sweet
  • lets just say you’re a heavy sleeper lol
  • he lifts you up a little to adjust the pillow under you so you dont wake up feeling sore and makes sure you’re all comfy before he falls asleep
  • remember he’s been basically coming over since middle school so this was a normal situation but with different feels 
  • ofc donghyun would wake up before you do 
  • he would wake you up if you were sleeping for too long
  • him waking you up would be really nice because he would be really gentle about it
  • he would call your name softly and shake you a little bit until you opened your eyes
  • and when you did open your eyes, the first thing you would see was his bright smile
  • you groan and shove your face back into the pillow cuz you don’t want to get up (not even donghyun’s sunshine smile was enough to wake you up)
  • this would result in him pestering you until you actually get up 
  • this would result in him pestering you until you actually get up 
  • as to how donghyun would confess to you, he waited until your senior year in highschool
  • he realized he had feelings for you in his second year of hs and was like “oh my god what are these feelings”
  • we know that donghyun can play the acoustic guitar from that one vlive where he sang “I Just Do” and it was amazing go find the clip on youtube 
  • to make this real cheesy, he basically wrote the song thinking about you with the help of his other close friend youngmin
  • he called you to come over to his house because he wanted to show you the song he wrote w/ youngmin
  • you sat on the couch while youngmin and donghyun sat on these stools that they set up in front of you, donghyun holding his guitar 
  • you knew how much he liked music so it was really exciting to see that he decided to write songs of his own
  • “wait wait wait can i record you guys?? i want to cherish your first live performance” you said excitedly, pointing at your phone
  • youngmin and donghyun stared at each other and laughed a little“y-yeah you can.” donghyun said looking a little shy
  • you smile and steady your phone with your hands and press record, giving them a thumbs up that you’re recording
  • donghyun strums his guitar a bit before actually playing the song and looks at youngmin nervously
  • donghyun starts singing the first lines and it made you feel all tingly inside
  • Please open your
    Pretty door today
    Since I brought a bouquet of flowers
    That look like your smile
    Will I be able to see your
    Truthful heart tomorrow
    I’m so nervous that I’m unable to sleep today as well
  •  you have this huge grin on your face because of the cute lyrics
  • and youngmin’s rap and you start unconsciously tapping your thigh with your hand along with the rhythm 
  • while donghyun was singing the chorus, he looks up from his guitar and looks directly at you with a huge smile on his face
  • for some reason your heart skipped a beat and you got really confused
  • “wtf was that did my heart really just skip a beat for kim donghyun”
  • your face turned a little red after the direct eye contact especially with the lyrics that you were hearing
  • your oblivious ass self finally wondered “did he write this song about me”
  • you sat there just blushing at the thought as they finished the song
  • get ready for some cheesy ass scene im sorry
  • they finished off the song and looked at each other again, youngmin widening his eyes at him and nodding
  • donghyun placed his guitar down and got up and walked towards the tv grabbing something behind it
  • you were really confused at what he was doing and you looked at youngmin who just gave you a suspicious smile
  • donghyun walked towards you with the item hidden behind his back, his face red and obviously looked really nervous
  • he kneeled down and looked up at you with that sweet smile of his and revealed the item he was item
  • oh wow it was a bouquet 
  • the bouquet included different types of flowers: gardenias, lilacs, pink carnations, asters, red chrysanthemums, and ofc red roses (all of these flowers relate to love ;) )
  • “Y/N you’re really oblivious so I had to go these extra steps just to tell you I like you. Alot.” he said shyly looking down for a second before looking back at you
  • you were completely baffled and your mouth was open from the confession
  • you covered your face in embarrassment and felt as your face started to heat up
  • “oh my god you dork” you said and pulled him in for a hug
  • youngmin watched from the stool and smiled like a parent, proud that his friend finally confessed his feelings (even if it was in the most cheesy way)
  • you’re both incredibly happy after officially becoming a couple
  • alot of your friends were like “wow finally” when you told them the news and you felt a little flustered telling them how he confessed to you
  • both of your parents were also like “finally” when you revealed the news to them
  • tbh your parents went overboard and were like “do we need to start planning for your wedding already????”
  • not much actually changes when it comes to living life
  • you were already really close and you guys basically went on alot of dates even before becoming a couple (though you guys considered it hanging out) 
  • the things that was added on was some affection aka holding hands, tighter hugs, tiny smooches on the cheek and forehead, even more pictures with each other, increased cuddling when you would go to each other’s houses
  • donghyun eventually exposed himself and showed you all of the secret pictures he took of you and he was really embarrassed 
  • you were like “wow really donghyun” in a surprised but pleased way and you started to tease him
  • “since we’re a couple now, you don’t have to be secret about it ;)” 
  • cue donghyun blushing and laughing at your dumb comment
  • whenever you would go on dates, you would search for couple items (cuz damn both of you want to show off each other’s love for each other in every way possible)
  • donghyun would continue writing more songs and most of them would be inspired after you
  • and everytime he would sing a snippet of it, your heart would be beating so fast and you would be basically fawning over your talented boyfriend
  • this whole thing is just sweet and cheesy but its cute jadhdakdhs

anonymous asked:

i know its nice being ship friendly and stuff but SOMEONE'S POINTING A GUN AT YOU, THEY HATE LEVIHAN AND THEY'RE GONNA KILL YOU IF YOU DON'T CONVINCE THEM OTHERWISE, YOU GOTTA DEFEND LEVIHAN WITH YOUR LIFE, WHAT'D YOU SAY? GO!

You know, that’s a really weird murderer. Anyway, THIS IS FUN! Honestly, i’d be dead already, because i don’t really care about convincing anyone when it comes to shipping. Before i start, i’m gonna state that ANYTHING I’LL SAY HERE IS BECAUSE I’M FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE, DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONAL, GUYS. These will be pretty much the reasons why i ship them. The first part is a bunch of “objective” reasons (well as objective as it can get, because shipping can’t be a totally objective thing) and the other one is personal, so is up to you when to stop reading this. I apologize in advance for my English.

1)      Levi and Hanji are both really interesting and complex characters. He isn’t just a typical shonen badass guy and she’s not a typical crazy scientist. Levi is actually , from my pov, the most caring and selfless character of all SnK, he literally sacrifices himself over and over for the sake of others. Hanji isn’t just this sweet cheerful character, she has a mesmerizing willpower, nothing can stop her.

2)      They complement each other amazingly. They are both strong and smart, but in different ways. Any virtue that Levi doesn’t have, Hanji has it. Every flaw that Hanji has, Levi doesn’t. And they share two really important virtues, which are the foundation of any healthy relationship: they are both so loyal and passionate. They are literally willing to give up their lives for the people they love.

3)      THEIR INTERACTIONS ARE SO FUN TO READ/WATCH. You just know that, whenever they are together, something great is going to happen. There’s something refreshing about them, about their bickering, about the way they work together, about the way they care about each other so deeply.

4)      I think nobody can understand them more than each other. They have experienced similar things as soldiers, they have lost people they love countless times. I bet they could be sharing each other stories all night long, reminiscing all of those good times with Moblit, Erwin and their old squads.

5)      Okay, i won’t force my ship to anyone, but since i’m fighting for my life here, i’ll say i think there are actual canon hints for Levihan. Like the “Levi bathes Hanji” thing, the “we tell each other everything” thing (don’t u dare telling me Hanji clearly said they’re just friends, cuz isn’t that what every Levihan shipper has as a headcanon? The idea of them not admitting their true feelings and say “we’re just friends” ‘cause they’re both awkward dorks), their interaction in ACWNR, their interaction in Shingeki! Chuugakkou, and the “Levihan is similar to Eremika” thing. It’s up to you, random killer, to decide if that means romance or not.

6)      I hate to fangirl here, but HAVE U SEEN THEM? They are both beautiful and would have babies as beautiful and brilliant as them. What a blessing. I love drawing them so much because their character design is gorgeous. Levi with his cold colors and Hanji with the warm colors, they even complement each other in that aspect.

7)      The Levihan fandom is amazing. Besides the fact that there’s no drama and everyone is so kind, I’m pretty sure this is the ship with the funniest fan art. Even the most serious person would smirk even a little bit while scrolling through the Levihan tag. I mean, we’re all about the laughs. All of the other ships usually focus on the classic romantic stuff (i say “classic” , because from my pov there’s nothing more romantic than the OTP having fun ❤). With Levihan, you’ll get from the most intense fan art to the most ridiculous headcanon, it’s so much fun. Some Levihan artists are pretty well known among non Levihan shippers because of that same reason, like @alemanriq, @trash-god or @drinkyourfuckingmilk . I mean, really, if you’re feeling down and need to cheer up a bit, they’re the way to go.

One of the main arguments people have against Levihan is that they’re too different, so it wouldn’t work. They even go as far as saying that Levi doesn’t really care that much about Hanji. My first response is that both Hanji and Levi are highly misunderstood characters. We don’t have to let our personal experience makes us decide what is love and what isn’t. We all show our love in very different ways.

Now heres my second argument to that idea and this is gonna get personal. If you don’t wanna read about my life, skip this.

Keep reading

Boyfriend Rowoon

-you have accepted the fact that this giant will always be hovering over you and giving you bear hugs whether it’s in public or at the dorm with the boys, and you don’t even try to break free because it has never happened before and it will never happen once he’s gotten a hold of you. Forehead kisses, never letting go of your hands, and you sitting on his lap is an absolute must. 

 -The kid lives for couple coordinated outfits, he love wearing matching shoes and jackets, showing you off and everyone often says you guys are couple goals and he’s so fricken proud of that while your like ok its not that deep rowoon and hes just grinning at all the fan-site photos like omg we look cuteee. He’ll drag you often to public events because hello couple goals and yall attend seoul fashion week every year like its your religion. It’s casual to see many girls anywhere and everywhere checking him out even when you’e right next to him but you’re really chill and cool about it because you know he loves you wayyyyyy to much, it’s like he forgot that other people exist sometimes. 

-Selfies? A tradition to do everytime you meet. Selfie when your dressed up, selfies with you both look like shit, selfies in the bathroom, bedroom, public  candid selfies, cute couple selfies, creatively planned and well posed photoshoot type selfies, derp ugly selfies, cartoon filter selfies, etc.

-Is so cute because he’s always easily jealous when it comes to you not giving him attention when you’re out with other people and sometimes it gets annoying because rowoon chill i love you ok i wont leave you but he’s also super considerate about how your feelings at all times and gets worried about the smallest things like him having a female love interest in his new kdrama. “It’s just acting ok? Don’t feel hurt, you don’t have to watch it. She means nothing to me.” Whenever he does hurt you though, it kills him so much and he’s so emo for the rest of the day even when he’s working- lowkey he knows he shouldn’t be cold when hes around fans but it just comes out like that and he gets scolded alot by his manager however, he’ll just take the scolding because all he’s thinking is about calling you when he gets home (the type to leave like at least 2 texts and calls before giving up).

-Dates include getting coffee and walking together holding hands or even just lazying out on the couch watching movies and eating snacks with his shirt off and you in nothing but his tshirt, either way he’s up for anything as long as he’s with you. You’ll start to realize the chic and cool image rowoon is basically only on stage because with you he’s like a cute puppy who always needs to be near his owner and is super dirty sometimes like him not washing his hair rolling on the floor but it’ cool because you love him. THIS BOY ALSO A HOT ASS CHEF so nomatter how many times you’ve seen him shirtless in the kitchen cooking you something, it just never gets old and you’re like why is this kid so hot damn….

-Expect you to come to all of his events. “You’re coming to my show in Singapore right?” and you frown cuz Rowoon thats all the way in freaking Singapore, and he just looks at you smiling like “Here’s your plane ticket and you roll your eyes and groan because he does this every time but it’s not even about the fact that he’s spending his hard earned money on your plane tickets whenever he goes out the country- it’s just because you have your own life and schedule and can’t go see him whenever you want so you guys often argue about that even though you always end up going to support your silly boyfriend at the end because he’s always in a better mood when he sees you in the crowd, you’re his lucky charm. Basically even though you whine for him not to spoil you, he always shows up with gifts, or paying for this and that and sometimes when he’s busy he just leaves stuff on your front door and you are half thankful but also sad because he does so much stuff for you.

-Won’t talk alot about you or hardly at all on camera or on tv, but whenever he is asked, his face will always turn a bright red and look down like the cutest little shy bean ever. “Yeah she’s doing alright..” He’ll say with a soft smile, he doesn’t want to talk too much about you because he wants your life to be private and knowing how hard it must be for you to date an idol, it’s better to keep you a mystery so you don’t get hated on. However doesn’t try to hide you in public either like other idols when going on a date. Will walk freely in the night and day with you like you’re hips glued to him or something even when there are people taking pictures. He will look the coolest to you during moments like this because his full attentions is on you and will never accept pictures with others or autographs because he’s really serious about his personal time-but of course rejecting them in a nice way and always with a smile. Your friends also know about him and everyone around you talk about how you’re dating an idol and you sometimes feel like it would be a burden on him because you’re expected to bring him to parties and stuff or people will say he doesn’t care about you but he always comes every single time with you even when he’s tired from a schedule and everyone’s shooked af because they didn’t think he would care enough to come but he’s always super happy every time like yes I’m y/n boyfriend!

-He asked his staff members if you can work part time in the summer and that was how you ended up working as an intern with fnc, being a stylist for sf9. It was nice being almost everywhere with him but was also really weird because since your relationship was public, everyone treated you super duper well and you didn’t have to do intern chores like run for coffee. You used to be able to touch up the other member’s makeup but because of that one incident where Taeyang play-flirted with you to piss Rowoon off, you were only allowed to take care of Rowoon from then on because your boyfriend is petty af.

-Basically love you alot, is a cute puppy- is YOUR puppy and keep him smiling all the time. Don’t ever question your love for him because that’s what keeps him so bright and happy and just allow him to take care of you even though it’s a bit burdening, know he means well. 

Originally posted by sf9fantasy

anonymous asked:

Drunk MC + bidders headcannon?

Drunk Cain eh? You go it! These will be short drabbles

Drunk M!MC KBTBB
Rated M for Language and suggestive themes 

Eisuke

If there was one thing Cain hated it was being told what to do. Especially by the King of Monkeys/Morons/Fools/Complete Idiots, AKA Eisuke Ichinomiya. It had all started when some rich bastard booked a room at the hotel. “Eisuke I must see this man that you’ve dedicated your life too.” And that’s when things went to hell. He didn’t like that he had to wear a stuffy suit, he didn’t like that he had to smile, he didn’t like that Eisuke nudged him in the ribs when he wouldn’t laugh at this rich bastards ‘jokes’. The only friend he had in this situation was booze. Pure, booze.

At first it was just a few sips here and there but as the man got louder and took jabs at Cain’s appearance and the way he was brought up sips turned to gulps. Three glasses in of whatever the hell he was drinking and the world seemed to glow. Cain nearly dropped the empty glass onto the table as he reached for the bottle.

“T’s empty.” He said as he waved the bottle around.

There was a sudden heat on his neck. He looked over and saw Eisuke glaring holes into him. “Whuuuutt?” He tilted his head. “Whuuuuutt!?” He said louder when Eisuke didn’t answer him.

“You sure do have a boozy lover there Eisuke.”

Cain looked over at the fat bastard and sneered. “T’s the only way I can deal with your flapping lips.” The man looked shocked that a peasant was talking to him like that. “Hahaha! Booze makes you look less ugly.”

“Cain!” Eisuke glared harder.

“Whuut? I see you! I see you taking secret shots cuz this guys jokes SUCK!”  He gripped Eisuke’s shirt collar. “Imma be perfectly clear.” He leaned in and smirked. “Hurry up and finish this meeting because I want you. Right now.”

Eisuke closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Well, as you can see my lover is wasted so we’re going to cut this meeting short. He’ll send a formal apology tomorrow and we will finish this discussion later.” He gripped Cain’s hand tightly. “Have a good evening sir, I’m sorry for his unruly outburst.” And pulled him away. “Or some shit like that. That guy was duller than paint drying.”

“Mmhmm.” Cain yawned.

“Oh? Tired? Well I’m about to wake you up.”

  • Eisuke did not make that morning meeting.
  • Cain did not send an apology letter.

Soryu

Cain wasn’t much of a drinker around Soryu. They had a few glasses of wine here and there but he preferred drinking to relieve tension or stress. Around Soryu he really didn’t feel a need to do that. They could hold intelligent conversations and they rather enjoyed the silent moments between them. But on rare occasions Cain let himself enjoy a party atmosphere. Normally he would stagger to his own house, but tonight…

“Heeeeyyy!” Cain leaned against the wall to keep himself stable. “Mind if I cr-cras-crash here?”

“What… happened to you?” Soryu lowered his newspaper and stood up slowly.

“Tequila.” Cain fanned himself. “My god, why is it always so damn hot in here?” He undid his shirt buttons and nearly tore it off.

“Who were you with?”

“Vi-Vi-Viktor.” He mumbled as he pulled off his belt in one motion. “I was with, brh, Viktor.” He felt Soryu’s hands grab his shoulders suddenly. “What?”

“You look like you’re about to fall…”

“Thank you.” Cain looked up at the taller man.

He could hear Soryu suck in breath and look away.

“What?”

“N-nothing. Anyways, why don’t you go and take a shower?”

“Sure, sure.” He started undressing at the door. Soryu quickly slammed the front door shut and pulled Cain further inside. Completely in the nude Cain looked at his clothes on the floor and suddenly started to fold them. “What is this? A pig sty?” He folded them and then placed them back on the floor. “There. Alright let’s go.”

“What?”

“Let’s go shower.” He pulled Soryu, who wasn’t technically resisting, and walked to the shower. “You can’t shower with clothes on, hello.”

“I…” There was a long pause as Soryu watched Cain shamelessly undress him. “Alright.” He chuckled when he saw Cain fight with the buttons and curse under his breath. “Let me help you.”  

Cain was practically hanging onto him now as he reached behind him to test the water. “T’s ready.” He slurred and dragged in Soryu still half dressed. The moment the water hit him he leaned into the mafia boss and nearly passed out. “T’s hot. Bout to getter hotter to.” He slipped down to his knees.

“You- Guh! Alright then. Slow down the-tch-re.”

  • Cain nearly passed out twice
  • Move to the bedroom you two, move to the bedroom.

Ota

Watching Cain drunk was like watching a masterpiece being created. The man who insulted anyone and anything without any hesitation was now kind and vulnerable. And vulnerable was the key word here. Unsurprisingly to Ota Cain wasn’t a crier or one of those touching feeling ones who declare they love you. No Cain was more… willing, to say the least. Willing to be Koro and willing to be his model in his art. It was pure bliss.

“Now lean over this way.” Ota pointed with his pencil. “Pffft.” He bit the inside of his lip as he watched Cain sway to one side. “Not like that, more to the left.”

Cain shook his head. “What… what was those chocolates again?” He collapsed to the floor.

“They were regular chocolates, Koro. I didn’t think you’d eat the whole box though.” He smirked. He knew Cain would because it was Wednesday and he new Cain always had horrible customers on Wednesday and he knew chocolate was the only thing the casino worker enjoyed in life so… it was just opportunity at its finest.

“I feel warm.” He stood up and leaned against the table Ota had set up. He felt his legs shaking as he tried to stay upright. “I ju-”

“STOP! Don’t. Move. Stay just like that.” Ota suddenly went serious and stood up. “Do not move.”

“Ah… but this is difficult.” He was about to shift his leg.

“No! Stay!” He commanded. “Stay.”

“My legs… are shaking though.” He gripped the edges of the table. “W-what was in those chocolates again?”

“Alchohol. Six percent of alcohol. Stop moving.”

Cain looked back. “What?” He turned around and gripped Ota’s shoulders. “Bastard.”

“Didn’t I say not to- Ah!” Ota fell to the floor. “Koro! Stop this at- Wh-wh-what are you doing with that rope?!”

“Hush now, Koro.” Cain smirked as he ripped off Ota’s clothes. Though both were the same height Cain was just strong enough to keep Ota on the floor. “Stop moving. Stay!” He tied the ropes into diamonds and smirked. “Ah what a masterpiece.”

“Koro! Bad! Ugh, th-the ropes.” He squirmed as the red rope rubbed against his skin. “You… you! You’re going to pay for this Koro! You can’t do this to your master!!”

“I can and I did.” His eyes glazed over. “Well well, this is the cutest I’ve ever seen you. This needs to be captured.”

“WHAT!?”

Cain staggered up and looked around the room. “There it is.” He grabbed a camera and chuckled. “Now smile dear.”

“Untie me! Now Koro!”

“No master I don’t feel like it.” Cain pressed his foot into Ota’s shoulder and raised the camera. “That’s a nice face right there master. What’s this? You seem to be reacting quite nicely to this. How strange.”

“I am not! Get off of me so I can punish you.”

“Oh ho~ I can’t leave you like this. No way. Come now Koro-master or some shit. Let’s put you in my shoes.” He leaned down and raised the camera. “Come on Kisaki, I won’t let you go until you call me master.”

  • And that, as they say, is that.
  • Role reversal

Baba

The thought of drinking with the chipper thief was not something Cain truly desired. Baba was already more than enough of something of an idiot, though he was his idiot so it was fine. Drinking with him wasn’t something he enjoyed, but making drinks was always a pleasure. Because when Baba drank he irritated Eisuke and there was nothing sweeter in life than that. And when Baba got hyped up he channeled that energy into funner things.

But Cain didn’t just serve him any old alcohol, he made sure it was special and too his boyfriends liking. He was practicing his mixology playing with tastes and presentations. Normally he did this alone because it usually ended with him waking up with a hangover and he did not want Baba to see that.

So there he was sitting on the couch ‘practicing’ his bartending skills and watching some idiocy called Desperate Houseflies or something. “Oh shut up!” He threw a can of beer at the wall. “Noisy women. Complaining about things that don’t matter.” He opened another can of beer.

In truth, this was his time to wind down and watch trash tv.  He did have some new recipes and perfected others but that was just the starter. Sitting down and drinking cheap canned beer was what he was looking forward to most. He leaned his head back and took another sip.

“Enjoying ourselves.”

“Pwwffft!” Cain spat out his beer all over his shirt. “Ack! What the hell are you doing here!?”

“Ouch, so salty. I was just cuurrrious.”

Cain grabbed a napkin and wiped his shirt. It was pointless, the shirt was ruined. “What are you talking about?” He growled.

Baba looked like he was just waiting for Cain to ask that. “Every time I go out on a one day trip you get wasted.”

“That’s!”

“It doesn’t take a genius to figure it out. Sure there were the beer cans you thought you so expertly hid away but the best part of my little snooping didn’t require any skill at all.”

Cain only glared harder.

“Nuh-uh that’s not gonna stop me. It’s this doll.” He picked up his phone and opened his voicemail.”

Cain’s face flushed.

“From flat out insulting to the most dirtiest voicemails I’ve ever received. You never fail to amuse me.”

“Dele-”

“Nope! The more saucy ones are great for the long trips!” He winked.

“You!”

“No you.” Dammit Baba had the upper hand in this conversation! “I just wanted to see for my own eyes what this version of you, who leaves such naughty little voicemails, is like.” Baba turned on one of the voicemails.

Cain’s face turned redder than cherries. “I! I! I!! I am most certainly not going to show you that. I! Nnngh!!” He didn’t even recall being so… so obscene. He lunged at Baba trying to take the phone. “God! Turn it off!!!”

“I will. Once you show me this side of you. I’ve never heard you moan like-”

“SHUT UP!!!”

“I’ll turn it off, if-” he turned up the volume.

“Fine! Fine!!!” Cain stepped back. “J-just turn it off already.” He looked down. “Please.”

“Then let’s enjoy some drinks and see what fun I’ve been missing out on.”

  • In the end Baba got what he wanted
  • Oh ho~ I wonder if the other bidders received these voicemails GAAHAHAHA!!!

Mamoru

Going out for a drink was something the two learned to love to do together. Sitting quietly in a bar, listening to the banter, not really talking. Just there for the atmosphere. It was their quiet time together. Normally. There was a bachelorette party going on tonight and then women were telling stories and having a fun night being single for the last time. He listened to their stories as they progressively got more drunk and found himself drinking at their pace. It must’ve been the atmosphere that was amping up his drinking habits.

“Hey, kid, slow down.”

Too late for that. “Sherr.”

“Dammit, kid you go-”

The bachelorette walked up to Mamo and leaned in. She started… talking to him. Cain watched as he downed a shot. Why is she so close to him. He looks disinterest but still.

“Hey there.” One her friends walked up to Cain. Boy she smelled like booze. Or was that his own smell.

“What?”

“Ouch, so curt. What are you doing here all alone?”

“I’m not.” He tensed when she smiled.

“I don’t see anyone with you.”

“I’m with someone.” He looked back at Mamo only to see him on the dance floor with that women. Geez he couldn’t dance at all. But what the heck? When Cain wanted to dance, and he prided himself as a good dancer, Mamoru just said,

“Why should I dance with a kid like you?”

And what? It’s okay to dance with that woman? Wait… did he like dancing. He certainly was confident that he’d be amazing at it, as he was in everything. He placed his hand on his head. “Oi…”

“Hmmm?”

He felt lightheaded. He wasn’t thinking straight. Normally this wouldn’t bother him but now that he had some booze in him, he felt sensitive. He took her hand. “Let’s dance.”

The music was fast paced, not something old man Mamoru could keep up with. Really Cain couldn’t either his head was swimming. He and the woman danced close and he never left Mamo out of his sight. It took two songs but the detective finally spotted the two. He arched a brow and froze for a second before suddenly making his way to him. “Come on kid, time to take you ho-”

Cain turned around and nearly dirty danced his way into him. He didn’t like dancing like this but it shut up the detective. “Oh what? I couldn’t hear you over my brilliance.”

“You’re dancing like a fool.”

“At least I get to have some fun.”

“Well can you blame me? You don’t seem like the type.”

“So what? I asked and you always call me kid. Which is irritating! I’m a grown man you know!”

“You certainly aren’t acting like it. Whoah! Careful! You almost fell.”

Cain gripped his head with one hand and wrapped his other around Mamoru’s neck. “Ahh… it’s hot.”

“What are you going o-”

“It’s so hot and you made me sad. And I hate dancing!” He felt the world spin. Though Mamoru was in full focus in his vision. Yes Mamoru. Wow, Mamoru looked really good right now. Really good. And he looked even better naked.

“I figured. Ah wait!! Take your hands off of my buttons!”

“But I’m hot.”

“What does? What does that have to do with undressing me?”

“Cuz I want you.”

Mamoru froze once more. “You… you better be serious right now.”

“I am always serious.” Cain fumbled with his belt buckle.

“Hold your libido! Come on we’re doing this in the back.”

“Eh? Fine okay but how are they supposed to know to STAY AWAY!” Cain glared at the women.

“Shut up. C’mon you idiot…. WAIT FOR A FUCKING SECOND!”

  • Remember that sensitive remark?
  • That applied to his body as well neheheheh
Behind The Scenes 3 (4.5/???)

Author’s note: It may be a while till I post the next scene. I haven’t had any time or inspiration to continue writing BTS 3 where I left off (Don’t worry I’m talking about my Malaysia scenes. There is still a bit to go before you all catch up to it). I need to buy myself more time so I can start writing and perfecting the last scenes of BTS 3. Sorry for any errors or any cultural and environmental inaccuracies.

Genre: Fluff-ish?/ Angst? (Suga, Jungkook)

Word count:1826

City: Shanghai

Summary: You, Jungkook and Suga go out to the beach.

Other parts: HERE

This is my GIF. I made it based on this scenario series.


The beach was beautiful. The three of you made it to the shore almost at sunset, just when the sky was its most colorful. Even though there were quite a bit of people, you didn’t really mind. You weren’t too scared of running into any fans.

When the three of you came closer to the water, you all removed your shoes to let the dying waves splash over your feet. As always, y ou and Jungkook held hands. Jungkook being the “gentleman” he was, held your shoes for you. Suga straggled behind the two of you, constantly stopping to take a few pictures.

“Damn, it’s such a nice evening.” Jungkook said.

“Right! The view is so amazing!” you said looking past him to see the hues of yellow and orange.

“Finally you agree that I look amazing!”

“Shut up!” you laughed.

You could hear the sound of water splashing behind you and soon Suga appeared next to you. “What are you guys talking about?”

“About how good looking I am!’ Jungkook stopped, let go of you, tossed the shoes in the dry sand and moved into a dramatic model pose. “Yoongi quick! Take a picture. I can’t hold my breath forever!”

Suga rolled his eyes at him. He lifted his camera, but he didn’t bother to aim it, he just lazily clicked away a few times.

“C’mon let’s keep walking!” you laughed. You tugged on Jungkook’s arm, but he refused to move.

“Jagi no! He needs to take a good picture!” Jungkook said still holding his breathe.

You gave one last tug and he dramatically fell to the ground, making sure to land where the water didn’t reach him. “Jagi! Why?!? I thought you loved me?!?” A last puff of air escaped him before he played dead.

Immediately, Suga crouched next to him and took many pictures of Jungkook at all angles. “Ah yes! These are the images I want!” He laughed

Jungkook broke into a smile. “Ya!” He laughed, pushing Suga away and picking himself up. “Yo, take a picture of me and y/n. We can put it online! Baby, do you wanna take pictures?” he asked, turning to you.

You shrugged, “Eh, I guess so.”

The two of gave your back to the water and faced Suga. Jungkook came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your shoulders. You put your hand on his and smiled into the camera.

“Smile.” Suga said bitterly as he aimed the camera at you and Jungkook.

After only a few shots were taken, Jungkook practically shouted, “Wait!”

You jumped up a bit at the loud voice that boomed right in your ear and you looked up at him with a bit of a snarl.

“Jagi, let’s make this one a funny one!” he suggested.

“Kookie no!”

“C’mon it’ll be fun!” he insisted.

“Fine!”

In a aplit second you put yourself back in a happy mood and you both proceeded to make derp faces at the camera. Suga continued to take a few pictures, but he didn’t even seem a tiny bit amused by the stupid faces you were making.

“Kookie, can we stop now? Let’s take better ones.” you whined

Suga’s expression cringed into an even more bitter expression. “Why are you guys acting like that? There aren’t even that many people around and it’s not like anyone knows what we are saying!”

“Cuz we can’t hide our love!” Jungkook shouted, staying in character. You could feel his arms tightened around you. “Look at the beauty before us! How can one not show her affection!” All the noise coming from him was earning “a bit” of attention from the people around you.

You felt so paranoid with so many judgmental eyes staring at you all. You turned around and hid your face into Jungkook’s chest. “Oh gosh, don’t be so loud.” you whispered

“I’m getting people to stare so all this doesn’t go to waste, but I’ll stop if you want me to.” He whispered.

You nodded.

“Are you two done?” Suga asked. It was easily to tell he was annoyed about something.

“What’s with you?” Jungkook asked with what you thought was the slightest hint of a smirk.

“Nothing!”

“Are you sure? What’s wrong?” you asked.

“I said its nothing!” he said walking off down the shore on his own.

Jungkook picked up your shoes and grabbed your hand. “C’mon, let’s keep walking.”  

You quickened your pace to try and catch up the Suga. “Yoongi, can I see the pictures?” you hoped that talking to him would get him out if whatever mood he was in.

He didn’t say anything or even look back at you. He simply handed you the camera. It was already opened to the pictures he took of you and Jungkook.

You couldn’t help but shriek when you laid eyes on the pictures. “Aah! I look so gross! Why did you actually take these?!?”

“Nah, you look cute, an ugly cute, but still cute.” Suga said, keeping his eyes forward.

Jungkook took the camera from you. “Oooohhh, looks like we found our BTS meme queen!”

Almost immediately, Suga ripped the camera from his hands and turned it off.

You looked back at Jungkook, but all he did was shrug at you.

Things were silent amongst the three of you until you heard a phone ringing. Suga pulled his phone out from his pocket and when he looked down at the screen, he broke into a small smile. “Oh, hey Aiko!” he answered cheerfully.

Instantly you could feel your insides twist. You felt a pang of jealousy hit you in the chest just from hearing him say her name.

“Yeah I’m just here on the beach with y/n and Jungkook.” He continued. “Shanghai… ha yeah, I guess you could you could say I’m the third wheel… Well, if you were here, it would be a different story… Hang on a second.” He covered the speaker of his phone and finally turned to face you and Jungkook. “Do you guys wanna go back to the hotel? It’s kinda hard for me to talk to Aiko with so many people around.”

“Already?” you frowned. “I was just starting to have fun…”

you could see Suga frown a bit himself. “Ah, well y/n-“

“Huh? That’s funny. I thought it shouldn’t matter what you say. It’s not like anyone around us can understand what you are saying.” Jungkook spat back with smirk.

Suga locked his gaze on Jungkook. “This is different!”, he said sternly. Then he looked back at you. “Why don’t we all go back? It’s getting a little late anyway. We should get back before Namjoon does.” by his tone it was as if he was almost begging you to go back with him.

“You go. Y/n and I are going to stay a bit longer.” Jungkook said.

Suga squinted at him.

“Go.” Jungkook insisted. “We’re fine. I can get Tae to tell us when he and Namjoon are getting back if that’s what you’re so worried about.”

Suga grumbled under his breath. You thought he said “not really.” but you weren’t too sure of that was what he really said. Suga looked back at you, and you could see he wanted you to go back with him. “Are you sure you don’t wanna go back?” Suga asked.

“… You go. I wanna stay longer.”

“Well… ok…” He picked up the phone again. “What were we talking about?” he asked as he walked off back to the hotel.

You watched as his figure got smaller and smaller as he left. You didn’t go back to walking in the water until you no longer saw him. On the inside, you were a bit mopey, but tried not to look too upset. “The sunset is so pretty.” You said. A part of you knew it was best to stay out with Jungkook. This was such a beautiful evening and it was possible you wouldn’t get another chance like this.

“Yeah it is…” You felt Jungkook lean closer to you. “Time out… Before we left the hotel, I really did text Tae to let us know when they’d be getting back. I didn’t want a repeat of what happened in Beijing…” He whispered.

You didn’t bother to say “time in” and you let your actions speak for you to let him know to get back into character. You squeezed his hand tighter and tip toed to give him a small peck on his cheek.

You both continued to walk in blissful silence. You took in the sounds of people laughing and having fun around you, the sounds of the waves crashing on shore and the sound of the sand crunching under your feet. You walked and walked until you got a bit tired.

“…Can we sit down?” you peeped.

“If you want.” Jungkook pulled you away from the water and to an empty spot on the beach.

You both saT down on a cool patch sand and you dug your feet into it. You rested your head on his shoulder and enjoyed the view. Thankfully, the calming minutes seemed to go by so slow. It felt as if you had been able to have a relaxing sit in the sand for hours. By now the sky was filled with oranges and pinks with the slightest hint of purple. Just when the orange was about to disappear and as the purple grew, the sky looked its most beautiful.

You turned to Jungkook. “Ooohh can you take a picture? The sky is so pretty right now!”  There were way less people around compared to before, making it the perfect time to take a decent picture.

Jungkook shrugged. “You can take it if you want.” He pulled out his phone and opened the camera for you.

You probably took about 50 pictures until you felt satisfied that you got a good shot.

“Hey! Calm down. You got like a five hundred pictures of the same spot!” He laughed.

“I had to make sure I got a good picture… Here, I’m done now.” you smiled tossing his phone back to him.

“… Y/n”

“Hm?”

“Time out again real quick. You wanna take a better picture to make up for the stupid ones from earlier? You didn’t seem too happy with those. If we take better ones I can post those or something.”

“Well we don’t have to. Do you really think we’ll need to take another one?”

“Well, I guess not. I’m not too sure how this whole dating lie should work. I feel like compared to real couples we don’t have a lot of pictures together.”

“That’s true… Yeah, we are probably slacking when it comes to this whole thing… Yeah, let’s take some nicer pictures.”

To embrace in the scenery of the beach, Jungkook made a big heart in the sand. He lay his head in one side and you lay your head on the other side. He got a good three pictures, before an obnoxious laser sound rang from his phone and a text from V appeared on the screen.

“Oh shit! We gotta go back now!”

You both jumped up immediately and maneuvered through the still crowded beach. Thankfully it didn’t take Jungkook too long to hail a taxi and the two of you made it back to the hotel before V and the monster did. 

Wonwoo: Blood for Blood, Bloom for Bloom (pt 1)

photo cred ©

[table of contents] I. II.

anonymous asked: hello! if its not too much, can i request a wonwoo hanahaki disease au scenario? like i want it very angsty bc i lov to break mi own heart but i dont want anyone to die. thank you, you lovely little bean hehe ^~^💛

Summary: a kind of fictional historical thing based in the tudor era but like u can’t really call it that cuz like did henry VII or queen elizabeth actually ever reign in this fictional world ??? that’s the real question.. also mingyu and wonwoo don’t wear those ugly ass balloon pants that were classic of the tudor era…. I wouldn’t do that to them… nor would I let them do that to themselves….


The sounds of an orchestra playing and feet shuffling in the background fade. Your shoes suddenly feel like nothing, unlike the previous iron weights that they had felt like before. Every blister and bruise becomes completely unknown to you. You lean against the window, the latticework cold against your cheek as fatigue settles into your bones, though only out of the anxiety of having to dance with strangers in the middle of a loud room.

“There you are,” You hear from behind you. You don’t turn toward the voice, knowing exactly who it came from and knowing also that you’d rather not see him right now.

“Here I am.” You state, your voice sounding pathetically weak and getting lost and muffled in the glass panes of the window.

“Your sister is looking for you.” Mingyu says. He reaches out for you, placing a hand on your shoulder, but you shrug it off with a sigh.

“When is she not?” You scoff.

Keep reading

j-aiunlennyface  asked:

Ola! ^^ it's me. I want to request an imagine about an s/o or friend who is really negative about themselves and is so insecure about what they look like. They just think that everyone does not like them. They want to talk to someone about it but they don't know how to put it into words so they just start crying. You can do your top 5 favorite hq characters. Cuz I'm just feeling a bit down lately and I need your professional writing skills to cheer me back up again :3

Hello~ Guys this is the girl who made my profile pictures! I hope you feel better soon!! Also thank you for your kind words(: I’m going to do head canons instead!


Oikawa (You all knew this was coming)

  • “Excuse me, did you just say that you’re ugly? (Y/n), do you not realize how beautiful you are? I literally tell you everyday that you’re pretty!”
  •  You have to explain to Oikawa that that’s not how it works and then he continues to list all of the things he loves about you.
  • As for people not liking you, he thinks yo are dead wrong. His friends/teammates love having you around! They think you’re really funny!
  • Oikawa spends the rest of the day showering you with love and affection, reminding you literally every two seconds that you’re beautiful.

Kuroo (You also knew that THIS was coming)

  • He was dumbfounded when you told him, he couldn’t believe that you didn’t see yourself the way that he saw you. You were the perfect woman in his eyes!
  • Kuroo sat you down and had “the talk.” Basically, he listed off all the reasons on why you’re beautiful.
  • He pointed out every feature he liked about you, Kuroo loves your eyes. 
  • Finally, Kuroo decided that he wanted to surprise you with a dat dedicated to you. He took you to all of your favorite places and when you came back, there were pink balloons waiting for you in your room with a bouquet of roses.

Ushijima (And this)

  • Wakatoshi was really confused at first, he didn’t understand how you could think that way.
  • Sometimes when he listens to you vent about your insecurities, he’s not too sure on how to respond. He finds it really hard to comfort you since that something he’s not use to doing.
  • However, despite Wakatoshi being a little bit of an awok-taco, he tries his best to tell you how he feels.
  • His honesty means the world to you, even if he is a bit too serious at times…

Futakuchi

  • “Um, are you blind? You’re like the prettiest girl in school.”
  • Futakuchi isn’t great at comforting either…actually, he gets really shy about it. 
  • Instead of comforting you, he buys you small presents to lift up your spirits! 
  • Even though he’s not really a romantic, he writes you a sweet love note describing all of the fond memories you’ve had. He also wrote how you should rely on him more. He’s the man, he wants to support you in every way possible!

Tendou

  • “What!? Don’t ever say that again, (Y/n)!”
  • Tendou hates when you’re sad, so he does his absolute best to cheer you up! He tells you lots of jokes and tries all day to make you laugh!
  • He loves when you smile! If you’re not happy, he isn’t happy. Tendou loves loves loves to make you laugh! It’s one of his favorite pass times! He also is really into teasing you haha.
  • Tendou reassures you constantly that you’re awesome sauce and always tries to distract your mind from thinking such toxic thoughts. He cares about you deeply and just wants you to be happy!

Thanks for requesting!

Dean is trying to get Cas laid in a bar and things end in way Dean hadn’t quite expected.


Be Direct

“No, don’t stare,” Dean was lecturing in frustration, hand pinching the bridge of his nose as he sighed. Cas, head snapping forward, twitched his eyes back and forth, wondering silently how one went about not staring. Was he not always, technically, staring?

Beside the two, first beer still in hand, Sam was laughing, head shaking as he leaned his elbows up against the bar. He was quite settled to simply watch and see how this whole scheme of Dean’s went.

“How am I to qualify my interest if I don’t evaluate my options?” Cas asked, just as frustrated as Dean with the situation.

“By not staring at every woman in the bar for five minutes straight!” Dean hissed.

“That is an exaggeration.”

“Christ Cas, how’d you ever get laid in the first place?” Huffing, Dean had leaned heavily against the bar, his beer mug sitting half full beside him as he looked Cas critically up and down. Now, granted, guy wasn’t the youngest looking, and the coat was a bit frumpy, but still, Dean was certain he shouldn’t have any problems. Just so long as he quit with the long, critical stares at everyone.

“It wasn’t that difficult,” Cas replied, eyes narrowing thoughtfully as he cocked his head to the side. “She came on to me actually, so there was very little work involved. Until the intercourse.”

Sam snorted, beer sputtering from between his lips.

“Right…” Dean deadpanned, taking a deep breath to prepare himself. “Well, first thing’s first, you can’t stare like that, alright? It’s creepy.” Dean knew plenty from experience. Granted, Cas’s intense eye contact had long since lost its creep factor with him, but that was a special case. Him and Cas were practically best friends. They could just read each other like that, through their eyes. Nothing weird about it.

“How am I to evaluate my options then?” Cas turned to look at Dean, a small frown creasing his curious expression.

“You skim,” Dean explained, allowing his own gaze scan the room as he did. Shadows, pool, cigarette smoke hovering above their heads – typical seedy place they frequented. It was happy hour however, so there was a generous number of patrons around, as well as quite a few ladies looking for attention.

He returned his look to Cas. “Only time you stare is if someone catches your eye, and even then, you don’t stare like… like you do.”

“Like I do?”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hi!! I love your art, i think you're SUPER skilled! I was wondering if you have any tips on improving and getting better at anatomy? Also stylization. How did you develop your art style?

Ohmgosh thank you you’re amazing and i want to hug you for saying such sweetie things to me ahhasdfJdskSFSAD. and tips?? hmm… I spent a long time thinking about these questions and how to answer them. Here I compiled all my personal advice and little mantra’s to myself and elaboration on each into three sections; improvement, anatomy, and stylization. gaw sorry this so looonnngg!!! but i wanted to cover as much as I could, so myeh here we go (mind you this is all stuff that works for me):

IMPROVEMENT

  1. Learn To Be Patient- Artistic improvement is a lot like losing weight; people become very discouraged when they don’t see immediate results, which makes them feel like they’ve made no progress. The fact is that improvement is so gradual that it’s hardly noticeable. So I encourage you to be patient, because after a couple months when you look back, you’ll be amazed by all the progress you’ve made, and trust me, it’s a great feeling. 
  2. Don’t Be Discouraged By Other Artists; Be Inspired!- This is something I see a lot, and it practically makes me weep. There are so many people I see on here that become completely discouraged about their art when they see someone else who is leaps and bounds better. In the worst case scenario, that discouragement turns to anger and jealousy, even hatred! I would know because I’ve been there once upon a time, but this is NOT the right way to handle it, and that it will get you nowhere. Now, whenever I see amazing art from another artist, I do become somewhat disheartened at first, but as I keep looking through their artwork, I steadily begin to be inspired; “OOooooo I like that linework,” “aaAAH I wanna try that!,” “kajsdfkasndfksad I LOVE THAT COLOR SCHEME,” and so on. I eventually reach the rationale that if they can do it, I can too! Turn that discouragement into encouragement! Desperation into inspiration! You also have to understand that these people are better because they put in the work, the effort, and the time to reach that level. Many of them have already gone through art school, have taken classes, and have had more time and instruction to develop and harness their skills, so duh, no wonder they’re better. One is not born with talent— you earn it. Discouragement is understandable, but jealousy is stupid. 
  3. Practice Does Not Make Perfect; It Makes Progress- No one’s perfect or ever will be. Not me your dog your grandma or your frog— no one! In turn, nothing you do or make or create will be perfect, so if you’re shootin’ for perfection you might as well shoot for the stars ‘cuz, HUH— DAT SHIT AIN’T HAPPENIN’. Practice will not make perfection, hate to break it to ya, but it makes progress, which is much more realistic and doable. So the more you practice, the better you’ll get!! Remember; you can only get better, not get worse.
  4. Don’t Be So Hard On Yourself- This is something I’m very guilty of, very guilty. I was really hard on myself when I was younger for not being better; I was extremely negative, downright cruel, harsh, unforgiving, borderline abusive, and I think I made myself cry more than anyone else did. Do not do this to yourself, it is unhealthy and it will damage you for a long time. Did being very hard on myself get me where I wanted to be faster? Sure, but it left a lot of mental scars I can’t mend— in the long run, it’s much healthier to be positive and forgiving. Do not be hard on yourself; I don’t want anyone to fuck themselves up like I did. If you need to talk or need help, you can talk to me. I’m always here to help and listen, something I never did for myself.
  5. Constructive Criticism Is Meant To Help You, Not Bring You Down, And Know The Difference Between Good And Bad Criticism, But Don’t Necessarily Disregard It When It’s Bad- This is another thing I see a lot of; people are so afraid of criticism!! Criticism is meant to help you see what you need to work on, to help you get better! When you shy away from it, you’re only preventing potential improvement! But of course, there are two kins of criticism, so it’s important to know the difference. Good Criticism is constructive. When you get this kind of criticism, I learnt that it should be like a sandwich; the beginning should be good things about your work, the middle should explain what you need to improve one, and the end should sum it all up and be overall positive. Now, it’s also important to factor in who gives you criticism. Criticism from another artist should be constructive, ‘cuz they’ve been there and understand how to help. Criticism from a viewer, who knows nothing about art, is less likely to be constructive, and will more likely be insulting and offensive, even if they didn’t mean it that way. This is Bad Criticism; basically an insult (even unintentionally) about your work. Something like, “You draw hands weird,” or, “your faces are funky,” or “you suck at arms,” and god forbid anything more horrible than that. Now, maybe this is shocking, but don’t completely disregard such comments. Yes, they can be downright mean and rude, but it is somewhat constructive; it’s just horribly worded. The idea is to not take these comments to heart, but just take them with a grain of salt. If they say you “suck at arms,” what they’re trying to say is that you need to work on your arms, because they can tell something ain’t right. I’m not just spitting this out either, I have experience in both these areas! STORY TIME; I was a little spitfire years ago, and I didn’t take to constructive criticism lightly, and whenever I got it, I’d be all upset and defensive (they were from other artist’s too). But those people were right, I realized after a while. The biggest spurts of improvement I got were when I received good criticism about my art, and I’m so thankful I listened. As far as bad criticism goes, someone once told me in a very roundabout way that I drew my eyes so big they were frightening. Yo, it was rude as shit and it hurt my feelings at the time! but they were also right. My eyes were too big, and after I toned it down, my art looked much better. Criticism is good you guys, even if it’s badly stated. 
  6. Know That, As An Artist, The Only Time You’ll Be Satisfied Is When You Realize That You’ll Never Be Satisfied- This is something I repeat to myself a lot, and it helps. There are people who go up to artist’s and say “wow I wish I drew like you!” and “you’re so good!” and so on. You need to understand that art is all about improvement, and no matter how good an artist may be, they are always seeking out ways to improve. There is never going to be a level at which you’ll be like “I’m good now i don’t need to improve anymore!” Nnno-no-no. Art doesn’t work that way, nothing really does. You’ll always want more, you’ll always feel the need to be better, and that’s okay! You should feel like that, but it’s unrealistic to pursue the ultimate level of perfection, as I mentioned earlier in number three. No matter how good you get, you’ll always seek to be better, and coming to terms with that is a truly satisfying feeling.
  7. It’s Completely Normal To Have ‘Swing-And-A-Miss’ Days- People can often come under the illusion that everything a good artist draws is perfect and that anything they draw is totally garbaggio. This mainly happens because when people go through an artist’s art blog, they see nothing ugly, or out of proportion, nada. Well, yeah. Why would an artist post his/her bad art? Artist’s want to show people their best stuff, not their failed crap. Every artist, whether at a novice level or a professional level, makes bad art every once in awhile. I have days where all my heads come out all funky and weird and gross, and then there are days that everything comes out nice like a dream! This is normal, this is natural. We all have swing-and-a-miss days, and I used this phrase for a reason. A baseball player doesn’t hit a home-run every time they step up to the plate, nor does every golfball player hit a hole-in-one on every course. Sometimes you’re gonna miss and that’s A-okay.
  8. Practice When You Can; Observe When You Can’t- A lot of artist’s say you have to, have to, have to practice drawing everyday in order to get good. Yes, it helps speed up improvement, but sometimes we don’t have a pencil and paper on us 24/7, sometimes life gets in the way, and that’s not your fault. This is why I feel that practice isn’t the sole player in improvement, and that simply observing can be very efficient. Whenever you find yourself without pencil and paper, just observe everything around you; study how clothes folds when people bend or move, take note of how light and shadow affect a figure. Just looking and analyzing and making mental notes to yourself can be very effective in its own right. Remember; you need your hands to draw, but you need your eyes to observe first.
  9. Don’t Force Yourself To Practice/Learn When You’re Not In The Mood- Do you remember in school, when you were in class in a subject you didn’t really care about, did you learn much? Did you pay attention as much as you would if it were something you found interesting? Likely the answer is no, you didn’t. It’s harder to learn things we find uninteresting, especially when we’re not in the mood to learn them. I’ve had this problem; I recently read a book that I felt I needed to learn from, but because I wasn’t in the mood, the first two chapters I read I can’t even begin to remember. But later, when I was in the mood, all up and ready and wanting to learn, the rest of the material stuck like glue. Simply put, sometimes you need to push yourself to learn things that will help you improve, but if you force yourself to when you’re in a bad mood, you’ll literally just be wasting time. Wait until you’re in a good mood, and learning material and having it stick will be much easier.
  10. How To Not Use ‘How To Draw’ Books/Tutorials-There are thousands of How-To books and tutorials out there, and a lot of them are great resources for learning! But not if you take them literally. For example, not everyone draws hands the same, and some people have different methods than others. These different methods aren’t wrong, they’re simply another way that someone draws hands. It’s the same with drawing figures; some people can draw, like, blocks and just shape it from there. Some people can use cylinder shapes and some just use simple lines. One, or two, or all, or none of these methods may work for you. These is why I wish more people would name their tutorials ‘How-I-Draw-Hands,” and so on. It basically comes down to you, and what works best for you.

ANATOMY

  1. Artistic Anatomy- There are more or less about 700 muscles in the human body, (oh yeah quite a daunting number) and learning anatomy for art can be quite taxing, especially if you’re teaching yourself (like me ugh). Fortunately, artist’s don’t need to know all 700 muscles to draw correct anatomy. For artists, we learn artistic anatomy, which only concerns the skeletal structure, tissues, and muscles that affect the surface form of the human figure. The book I’ve been using to teach myself anatomy is Classic Human Anatomy: The Artist’s Guide to Form, Function, and Movement by Valerie L. Winslow. Other good books for reference are like, training books, like Strength Training Anatomy by Frédéric Delavier. But learning anatomy is a slow process because anatomy is very complex, so pace yourself. Divide up the muscles; such as torso muscles, upper leg muscles, lower leg muscles, upper arm, forearm, shoulders, back, hands, feet, neck and head, etc. It’s gonna take a long time to learn it all, so try to tackle one section of the body at a time. My big thing is with hands right now, so I’ve just been focusing one that.
  2. Figure Drawing- It’s essential to learn anatomy for better artistic representation, but what’s just as important is figure drawing. Figure drawing is your golden key for better human figures and I’ll tell you why; it teaches you speed, proper proportions, and how the figure moves. The absolute best way to do figure drawing is with a live nude model, but if it’s too costly and there aren’t classes available in your area, there are plenty of sights online that you can use to substitute for now. Pixelovely is a great tool for figure drawing. Not only does it have a tool for human figures, it has a tool for animals, heads/facial expressions, hands, and feet, too! Other sights I like to use are Scott Eaton’s Bodies In Motion and Posemaniacs, and while I’m not particularly fond of deviantart, there’s a hullabaloo of people on there that make great stock photos just for artists. Also Andrew Loomis’ books, particularly Figure Drawing: For What It’s Worth, are absolutely amazing and I implore you to look into getting them. His books are goddamn gold.
  3. Studying Other Artist’s Work- Hrrmrnglemurnblehernfda… IIII haavee a story to thiiiss…. Once upon time, I. could not draw boys. For the LIFE of me. I couldn’t wrap my head around them. I could draw girls okay, ‘cuz they were easy for me but BOyZ were just this. WHoLe other thing I couldnt even begin to understand. BUT THEN— ..ah. omygod okay this is gonna kinda turn into a love story but goddammit it’s true… but then.. I discovered TeamFourStar, and TeamFourStar led me to Dragon Ball Z, and Dragon Ball Z led me tooo…. mmnngh,…… Vegeta. ohmygod. my heart. basically I just. I just fell in LOVE with Vegeta and he was all I wanted to draw for forever. but I couldnt draw boys at the time!! but I didn’t let it stop me, I LOVED HIM TOO MUCH. so i just started drawing Vegeta over and over and over again, and because I loved him so much I wanted to draw him well, I wanted to draw him right! So fukq. ohmygod. YES, I LITERALLY LEARNT EVERYTHING I KNOW ABOUT ANATOMY JUST SO I COULD DRAW VEGETA ANATOMICALLY CORRECT… AND IM STILL DOING IT JUST FOR HIM. I’m being one hundo honest; drawing Vegeta over and over again taught me how to draw men, and because he’s so muscular, I learnt a hell of a lot about muscles too. Studying Akira Toriyama’s anatomical style taught me a lot, and further inspired me to enhance my knowledge of the human figure with figure drawing, anatomy books, etc. The point of this story was to show how and why I started improving my anatomy. Vegeta makes my coca-cola go tokidoki. It beats only for him… I hope you don’t think I’m kidding. ‘Cuz I’m not. I’ll show you pictures.

STYLIZATION

  1. Realistic vs. Stylistic- Often I’ll see these, oh I dunno, kind of tutorial-esque posts about drawing hands or other body parts correctly, and pointing out what’s wrong— eh, example; one where an artist is pointing out that fingers have two joints, not one, and that if you draw just one it’s wrong, or if you draw the fingers like sausages with no joints it’s also wrong, blah blah. Well, realistically, yes, it’s wrong, but stylistically no no no. Realism has rules, but personal interpretation does not. It’s just like if you draw hands with four fingers instead of five; artist’s with a more cartoony style sometimes do this, and some don’t even put joints in them. Yeah, it may have only four fingers, but you still in fact know that it’s a hand. This is your own personal interpretation of the real, and after you know the rules, it’s okay to break them however you like to match your personal taste.
  2. ‘Mix-And-Match’ and ‘Give-And-Take’- This might sound a little obscure, but let me try to elaborate; an artist’s style is basically kind of a culmination of tiny details and tidbits from other artists styles. I’m inspired by a plethora of other artist’s work and how they draw this that way and that this way. From these I kind of ‘borrow’ little ideas and details here and there and loosely incorporate them in my own work, thusly, developing my personal style. Literally, you’re mixing all these little details together, seeing what matches to your liking, giving your style what you want to see and taking out what doesn’t work. Urrgh it’s hard to explain, but you just gotta try different things and see what you like. 
  3. Ask Yourself: Do You Want To Draw Like Someone Else, Or Do You Want To Draw Like You?- It’s easy to study someone else’s style and become so good at it that it’s now your style, but seeing this is always a little sad for me, ‘cuz; Why would you want to be a carbon copy of someone else instead of be you? Personally, even though I see these artists that draw very well and awesome and great, in the end, even if they’re better, I’d rather draw like me. My style represents who I am, and I’d much rather be me than somebody else. So ask yourself; do you want to have a style that represents someone else, or do you want to have a style that represents you?

AhhhAHHFa so that’s it! sorry that was so extensive and elaborate, but hopefully I helped somewhat??? myehasjfndkfdsasfsd well let me know if i did, and thanks for reading all this if you also did. dfarhmeysbasdfhn /runs away

STOMACHACHES, more like GERARD-INFLICTED-ACHES, eh, Frankie?

It’s a spiderweb.

You know where else there’s a spiderweb?

You know what it is a part of?

Yep. Frank's hopeless romantic tattoo. Hopeless with a spiderweb on one hand, romantic with just one half of a broken heart on the other.

And that one,folks, we’ve already talked about. It’s connected with the HOPELESS ROMANTIC song by the Bouncing Souls, I’ll now remind you of its lyrics (please note that Frank has also tweeted this song and these tattoos showed up on Frank’s hands around the ProjRevolution times so yeah.)

“I’m a hopeless romantic
You’re just hopeless

Beer and wine does me fine but
It doesn’t always do
When I get back up and dust off
I always come back to you.
I’m my own man with my own plan
I can’t do the things you want me to
I’m kinda lazy and I kinda stink
But I’ll clean myself up for you”

So obviously, that song’s got a lot to do with how Frank felt over Gerard’s well, or let’s just say over their 'break up’ after Projekt Revolution. …over the fight…and the non-talking and the band hiatus and leathermouth and world is ugly and stay and all that followed…ehm.

Now, the lyrics…Assuming that this is exactly how Frank felt (cuz c'mon,tweeting that song,getting a tattoo of it), then the half of the broken heart represents just that, a break up, being heartbroken, end of a rship. Frank was crushed and desperate and pissed off cuz c'mon,Gerard, but despite all that and how much he hated himself for it, according to the lyrics, he knew he would always get back up, dust off, clean himself up for and come back to Gerard. And THAT’S exactly what the web represents. It’s not being hopeless as in “there’s no chance for us anymore”, but being hopeless as in“i’m hopeless-ly in love with you, i will always come back to you, there’s no getting out of this love web”

Aaaaand here we come to the the album’s cover photo!!

 

So now you get the idea, i believe….cuz hell yeah, i’d totally say the spiderweb on the cover once again represents Frank being unable to get out of the freaking 'love'web of their relationship……He used to have stomaches after ProjRev (too), when he gained weight rapidly cuz of the pills he ate, also the anti-depressants and all that shit.

So yep, i’m pretty sure it’s ALL connected.

Now when we’ve discussed the (possible) general idea of the album, let’s get to the particular songs that stood out for me as frerardish ones.

(Mind you, this is just MY humble opinion. Not forcing you to read it, so if you’re not ready for a frerard dose, i kindly ask you to step away now.)

….Get ready for some LOOOOONG reading :-/ sorry.

Keep reading

Random bios (mega post) || #awesomepacks || da créditos a @iconnftheader

infucknity ∞

i dont fucking want this anymore

make me stay

im not strong

die like a paradise

be strong because im not

ilysfm ☠

so what¿

☛ hi bbys ☚

ihy

im△gine

☯ love me like you do ☯

☼ youre my sunshine ☼

where are my fucking fans?

☹ basic as fuck ☹

♡ im single ♡

br(ok)en

wonderl△nd

✿ whats bio? ✿

♡ heartbreakers ♡

fake ☯

neverl△nd

grow up dude

”i hate people i love pizza”

she can fuck u but i can fuck u better

nobody dies a virgin, life fucks us all and i can fuck u too

why i’m so sad

xoxo, gossip girl

you’re only a depressive bitch

this bitch actually thinks i care 

silence is better than bullshit

i shoud have made you mine

a kiss is just a kiss until it is with someone you’ll truly miss

i call him the devil cuz he makes me wanna sin

stop romanticizing things that hurt

cause you dont destroy people you love

you’ll always have a special place in my heart

you’d leave me anyway

cause your heart deserves a whole lot more than a broken girl 

did you ever think about the promises you made?

you hurt the only one who would never hurt you

i trusted you. my mistake, not yours

sadness is a drug

cause who would love a girl with scars

you were the first love i lost

to the moon and back, remember?

you cant break a broken heart

its like you ripped my heart out

break my heart and i’ll break your x-box

my nightmares are about losing you

we are unapologetic

△ live fast die young ▽

waiting for someone to save me from me

life is beautiful, really, it is, full of beauty and illusions

loveless

hopeless

perfect boys only exist in books

i didn’t know i was lost

everybody dies but not everybody lives

i trusted you. my mistake, not yours

that’s people, we arrive, consume what we can, then leave

time heals nothing, it just replaces memories

zombies eat brains, you’re safe

stars can’t shine without darkness

happiness will find you when you stop hiding

what is essential is invisible to the eye

mi ruberete tutto ma non il sorriso (me roubaste tudo mas não o sorriso)

someone once told me your eyes are the only truthful part of your body

our minds are troubled by the emptiness

soulless people

middle fingers up

some scars are ment to stay

one big school full of fake bitches

to love, is to destroy

if your eyes could speak what would they say?

dark circles has stories to tell

too vogue for you

in their last moments people show you who they really are

all monsters are human

are you living your dream?

no matter how good they are, some memories need to be forgotten

not expecting nothing from no one anymore

thanks for acting like you care

it’s not because i listen to weed i smoke miley cyrus

i was an angel looking to get fuck hard

i’ve been waiting yo meet you

stop pretending like you care, i know you dont

we get crazy every friday night

come on baby light my fire

too busy being yours to fall for somebody new

do you belive in angels? i’m yours

sorry i’m not like her

i’m suicidal, remember?

only know you love her when you let her go

why’d you let her go?

i do belive in true love, dont you?

you know you made my eyes burn

read this, thanks, now lets have sex

he’s my sun, he’s my moon

if i’m not with him, i dont wanna be with anybody

hold me tight

where was that love you used to give to me?

why is my heart broke?

we are unapologetic

love yourself first

love is keeping the promise anyway

one sick love story

i begged him to stay

i loved him, i loved him and i still love him

i’ve got red dress on tonight

dont you ever say i just waked away

when you say you love me, know, i love you more

and i love you more than i did before

my boyfriend went out with his litlle bitches, ops friends

clothes are boring, walk naked

live slow, die old

i shipp myself with pizza and coca

we live like rockstars

fucking hell

i wish i was dead

love me fuck me

dream to live

call me ice and suck me

give me a fuck

☼ pizza is my happiness ☼

welcome stalker

me aka fab

✞ i love bad boys ✞

my middle name is fab

✖ take a wish be a bitch ✖

♡ i love you more than i love pizza ♡

hipst△

trust me you are a bitch

» im a white nigga «

☯ live slow die old ☯

my argument is invalid

✵ this is my life so shut up ✵

take my lollypoop

aloha

♡ pizza aka life saver ♡

cool story bro ✌

hola

☾to the moon and back☽

♡ lol no ♡

”why so serious?”

let ♡ it ♡ be

i hate being sexy, but someone has to do it

shy in the streets, sexy in the sheets

your body is a wonderland

✝lets be nothing, I heard it lasts forever✝

△take every risk, drop every fall △

act like a lady. think like a boss

badboy, good lips

you and your heart shouldnt feel so far apart

she thinks that singing on sundays gonna save her soul

my dear, dont be sad

you are not alone

i never meant to cause you trouble

i lost my head

we believe in love, love doesnt believe us

i hate you all

i dont wanna be ugly anymore

just go with the flow

how fucking interesting tell me more

Living in the past will only fuck you up

help me, im dying

wishing to be perfect

“who says you are not perfect” “eu cachorra"

very, very gay

dude, i dont like you

no matter what, we party tonight

your smile is the best porn

who are you?

religion: pizza

♡ just hide the pain with a smile, it always works ♡

ice cream was my first love

what is it like to feel worth it?

call me baby and let me suck her tits

I was here all the time just you havent seen

suck me with black halls

hitler was evil because he cant know their idols

all people are some shit

i think i wanna fuck you

up the bitches

idiots, idiots everywhere

sleepy approved

i love your lips, they should meet mine

burning desire

dont do love, dont do friends

i breathe ddl

u only live once

you are so london

im lying at the cold hard ground

you make me sick

hashtag believe

free hugs

look at here

read this, thanks, now bring me food

thanks for reading the bio

please don’t go away

if you scared you better run

no one knows who you are

the only way i can escape is loving you

what’s up bitches

all we need in this world is some food

you have a twitter! what a loser

i dont know what i’m doing here

follow me and you will love me

i knew you were gonna come to me

don’t make me your enemy

there’s no going back

break my heart and i’ll break yours

show me yours i’ll show you mine

how dare you follow me?

the twitter ain’t big enough for both of us

not your fandom not your problem

no fc no opinion

all i need to understand is why you dont follow me

i follow rivers and you follow me

dont be a pussy

do you like my twitter? i love it

do you like my idols? i love it

i’m ready for your follow

mom help, there is people following me

the only thing i need it’s not you

i love you.. ok that is a lie

i love you hahaha ok next joke

what happends on twitter stays on twitter

there is no love for you

is anybody reading this?

i’m everything you wanted

what the hell are you doing here?

still better than you

pizza is my valentine

i have more followers than friends

you’re always on my mind

lonely hearts club

congrats for being such a asshole

i speak fluent sarcasm

show me your butt

dont be a dick

save your heart for someone who cares

where i can buy an ed sheeran? 

there’s someone in my head but its not me

i’m limited edition

i’m prada you are crocs

it’s time to leave feelings behind

i forgot my bio omg

sorry for being a queen

my butt my rules

i hope your mom disconnects your wifi

#1 most awkward human being on this planet

i’m surrounded by idiots

you keep my heart busy

you’re silly

loser in real life

love stinks

oh no, its you again

nobodys read my bio

and she smiled through the pain

dont let others influence your thoughts

dont give up on yourself

this is not wonderland and you are not alice

nothing hurts when you are dead

too young too dumb 

my illusion my mistake

sad teens with happy faces

  • symbols for u:

ღ ♥ ♡ ❤ ❥ ❦ ∴ △ ∞ ☆ ★ ✖ ®™☏℡゚✤ ♔♕♖♗♘♙♚♛♜♝♞♟ ❝❞✥ ✦ ✧ ✩ ✫ ✬ ✭ ✮ ✯ ✰ ✱ ✲ ✳ ❃ ❂ ❁ ❀ ✿ ✾ ✽ ✼ ✻ ✺ ✹ ✸ ✷ ₪ ❃ ❂ ❁ ❀ ✿ ✾ ✽ ✼ ✻ ✺ ✹ ✸ ✶ ✵ ✴ ❄ ❅ ❆ ❇ ❈ ❉ ❊ ❋ ❖ ▲▼△▽⊿◤◥ ◣◥●••● ❣ ✐ ✎ ✏ ✍ ✆ ☎ ✄ † ✞ ✝ ✛ ✙ ރ ▧ ▨ ▦ ▩ ۩ ஜ ಌ ஜ ๑۩۞۩๑ ஜ ஒ ண இஆ ௰ ௫& ૪  ◎♫♭♪♯♮♫♯♣♥♪♫☼♀♂♦ ♦ ♠ ♥ ♣ ● ☼ ⊙ ℃ ℉ °  ϟ ∞ ზ ♪♫♩♫♭♪♯♬♮♫♩♫♭♪♯♬♮♬♪♫ ☹☺ ☻ ت ヅツッシ Ü ϡﭢ ♥ ❤❥❣❦❧♡ ۵ 웃ღ♋ ♂ ♀ ☿ ⚥ ❢❣⁇ ‼ ‽⁈ ¿ ¡ ⁉؟ ﹖☩☨☦✞✛✜✝✙✠✚ † ‡♪ ♫ ♩♬♭♮♯° ø ✐✎✏✑✒✍✉⌨ † ☨✞✝☥☦☓☩☯☧☬☸✡♁✙♆Ⓐ☮✌☪ ⚔ ✡☭✯卐✆✉☎☏✁✂✃✄⋆✢✣✤✥❋✦✧✩✰✪✫✬✭✮✯❂✡★✱✲✳✴✵✶✷✸✹✺✻✼❄❅❆❇❈❉❊웃ღ ♥ ♡❤❥❦∴△ ∞ ☆★✖。◕‿◕。®™☏✤❝❞✥✦✧✩✫✬✭✮✯✰✱✲✳❃❂❁❀✿✾✽✼✻✺✹✸✷ ₪ ❃❂❁❀✿✾✽✼✻✺✹✸✷✶✵✴❄❅❆❇❈❉❊❋❖ ▲▼△▽⊿◤◥◣◥●••●❢❣✐✎✏✍✆☎✄ † ✞✝✛✙ރ⌚▧▨▦▩۩ ஜಌஜ๑۩۞۩๑
ஜஒணஇஆ௰௫& ૪

  • some faces:

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ (✿◠‿◠) ◑‿◐ ✖‿✖ ✿ ♥‿♥ (◠.◠) (◕‿◕✿) 。◕‿◕。 ⊱✿◕‿◕✿⊰(◡‿◡✿)(◕〝◕) ◑▂◐ ◑0◐ ◑︿◐ ◑ω◐ ◑﹏◐ ◑△◐ ◑▽◐ ●▂● ●0● ●︿● ●ω● ●﹏● ●△● ●▽● ⊙▂⊙ ⊙0⊙ ⊙︿⊙ ⊙ω⊙ ⊙﹏⊙ ⊙△⊙

Self-Abuse // Stiles Stilinski [requested by anon]

Description/Request: [anon] um would you be comfortable doing a fic where stiles finds out you selfabuse as punishment (punch yourself till you bruise) bc of your bad grades and offers to help tutor you (its okay if youre not comfortable writing this)

I was listening to Fix You by Coldplay. I always like to listen to sad songs while I’m doing these types of imagines cuz it helps me get into the mood. I don’t know.

I decided to switch it up a bit, like Stiles offers to help her when he sees her grades. And then when their studying he finds out. Hope that’s ok.

////

My life was pretty normal. You know, besides the fact my friends are supernatural creatures. You weren’t apart any of the fights, cause you were human, but you knew what was going on.

Other than that, and the fact I physically hurt myself every things pretty normal. I have friends, a family and awful grades like a normal teenager. The only problem is I actually want to go to a good college and get a good career instead of working at a fast-food restaurant {no offense}. 

It was Saturday night, and one of my friends, Stiles Stilinski offered to help me in math because he overheard me saying that I’ve failed the past three quizzes.

“So what is x times 12?” Stiles laid out the problem but I still don’t get it.

It’s not that I couldn’t understand what he was saying, I did. But my whole body was aching from last night. I now have about five really good bruises all around. My arms, legs, thighs, stomach. You name it, and theres a bruise there.

It wasn’t that I wasn’t used to the bruising. I’ve done it since freshman year, but last night was a little different. Instead of fifteen minutes of hurting myself, it was an hour.

My fists hurt, not to mention my body.

“Um..” I went to get up, my my thighs wouldn’t let me. Seeing me flinch, Stiles went to my side almost immediately. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” I cleared my throat and reached out to get my pencil.

“Hey. What’s that?” Stiles asked once I sat back up and pointed at my waist. Oh shit.

I looked at him nervously chuckling, “It’s nothing Stiles. Don’t worry about it.”

“Let me see your waist, Y/N.” Stiles’ voice came out stern as he basically commanded me to lift my shirt up.

Realizing he wasn’t going to stop until I showed him, I gave up. Lifting my shirt, I showed him the big ugly purple-blue bruise. “Who did that?”

Swallowing I didn’t answer his question.

“Y/N? Who did that?” His voice came out softer than it did before.

“I-I did.” 

Stiles stared at my for a moment, probably hoping that I was joking. When he noticed I wasn’t, I was pulled into his chest.

“Is it because of your grades?”

Nodding, his arms tighten around mines.

////

I didn’t really know how to end this, so I just left it like that. :)

I really liked this one, tbh.

Request anything here.

TSUKKIYAMAIWAOI HCS!!

SINCE I GOT ASKED ABOUT HCS FOR THIS LOVELY OT4 BY

taniushka12

​ SO HERE THEY ARE

i magine that tsukki and iwaizumi arnt as into doing the do as oikawa and yamaguchi are so like when tsukki isnt feeling up to it iwa joins tsukki on the couch to watch movies wile their boyfriends do the do in the room. iwa and tsukki bond over jeff goldblum movies cuz well jurassic park and wat not and like yeah those two just bonding over old movies and what not. 


Oikawa is the group motivator though when it comes to them feeling crappy about themselves Oikawa just knows what to say to make them feel good. espeically when it comes to yamaguchi and having moments of feeling like hes the ugly one of the four. like oh gosh Oikawa will not stand for their freckled beb to think such stupid things so he always gives yams a talk about how perfect he is and how his flaws are just as great as his best features and what now

 they have weekend arm wrestling matches and yamaguchi actually wins against everyone even Iwaizumi and they all praise and want yamaguchi to protect them. but oh man sure yams is their protector BUT IF SOMEONE TRIES TO FUCK WITH YAMAGUCHI THEY BETTER BE PREPARED CUZ OH MAN THEY DONE FUCKED UP!



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Star Wars Rant-Along: TFA EDITION! (Chapter III)

Helohello I am back! Tonight is Sunday night, whichmeans it drink night!RANT ALONG night. Star Wars Rant-Along: TFA EDITION, CHAPTER III! For those of you who don’t know what this is all aboot, basically I read through the TFA novelization chapter-by-chapter drunk on cheap wine and expensive chocolate, anddddd I rant about it! You can find a no-too-drunk explanation of this thing here. You can find Star Wars Rant-Along: TFA EDITION (Chapter I) here. You can find Star Wars Rant-Along: TFA EDITION (Chapter II) here.

sOME of this will make sense. Most won’t. as always, spelling mistakes will be left in for posterior’s sake, but I should warn u all I am not as drunk as last weke! Last week I got so drunk that I was hungover for three days,and it was not a fun time in Ohtze land. No sireee. If I am going to get that drunk, I am gonna need a MUCH better bookto get drunker to.

ANYWAYS. LETS GET THIS PITY PARTY STARTED (Rey bby, I’mso sorry. I will come keep u company)

CHAPTER III (In which Ohtze get excessively emotional)

Summary

  • Last week: Kylo meets bitch-my-hair-is-fabulous, aka Mr. Poe.
  • Kyle-is-shredded was having a really bad day cuz he lost themap and Mr. Poe was bein’ a dICK, so kylo had a tantrum. We mets Rey (aka one of the fukers who will do the fucking) and Mama Phasma. Death-on-WHEELS (aka BB8) wheeled the fuck outta dodge. Finn continued to have breakdown. Unkar plutt opined how he wanted to fuck rey, which is really gross cuz he a fish. Ohtze discovered shewaz reading a harlequein romance novel, and promptly had a breakdown.
  • THIS WEEK: kyle continues to have Very Bad Day™, so he tortures hoe-my-hair-is-fabulous to makes himself feel better (but acts all coy about it and basically goes ‘THIS HURTS ME MORE THAN U’). Rey takes bb to niima (the junkyards) and rey gets all sad and Ohtze gets allsad CUZ REY IS ALL ALONE AND LONELY AND SHE’S SO HUNGRY AND I CRIED-
  • Ahem. So liek, rey is canonically legit on the verge of starving half the time, so when uncle unkar offers her sixty portions for BB, SHE ACTUALLY GOES THROUGH WITH IT. uncle unkar hits on rey, and it is onlywhen rey learns that pedobear unkar plans to turn death-on-wheels over to kyle that she goes ‘nah son imma gonna KEEP him.’ Chapter ends with Finn deciding he’s gonna keep hoe-my-hair is fabulous, an’ after he gets over his panic attack he gets to rescue poe AND get a name (sort of). SUCCESS.

Notes (Livebloggin’, slightly tipsy)

  • I got white wine this week. It is shit but thereis no red wine and the only other optionis TEQUEILA, so wine it is cuz i gots to get up early in the morning an’ get a comic printed. I am alsoeating CEREAL. CORN FLAKES. They will sober me up cuz it is carbs and I say so.
  • TONIGHTS SOUNDTRACK:

  • TONIGHTS MOOD:

Originally posted by cequenousommes

  • Pg 38, Hoe-my-hair-is-fabulous is depressed. He gots caught and his x winger gots blown. I would be too, cuz getting beat is gonna ruin the perfect hair
  • Pg 39, kylo goes all ‘its not u, its me’
  • Look
  • LOOK:
  • ‘I regret the necessity. They are gratuitous in my presence. But those others who have made your acquaintences posses only the most primitive abilities, and further defiance on your part would demand their uneccessary exertions.’ He bent towards the prince. “none of this unpleasantness need be necessary. We both wanted the same thing from the old man. Perhaps he was more forthcoming with you that he was with me.’
  • GOD, KYLO, YOU SPEAK LIKE A THEASAURUS. HOW FAR UP UR OWN ASS ARE YOU
  • QUESTION, for the pplz reading: do you think kyle doesn’t actually like hurting ppl, or is he just acting like dis for siths n’ giggles????
  • ANYWAYS
  • Kyle does some harlequin romance shit (“tell me,” ren murmured. “tell me”).
  • then kylo goes to visit hux, aka general weasely/everyone’s favorite ginger nazi 

Originally posted by stayfarfarawayfromme

  • General Ginger proceeds to act like a dumbfuck.
  • Kylo tells him droid has map, and droid is on planet. Hux is all like ‘nbd, we gonna send a couple storm troopers down there and have it back in time for tea’ and kylo is all like ‘listen here you ginger fuck, Jakku is a pLANET.’
  • General gingerfuck does not get the hint, and proceeds to spout off inanities (“with any luck we may not even have to search for it ourselves” <LIEK WHAT DOES THIS EVEN MEAN, WEASLEY.  ARE U TELLING ME THE PLANET IS GONNA SEArCH ITSELF???)
  • PG 41, rey and bb-fuckin’-ATE arrive in Niima an’tey have a heart to heart. Rey gots really sad and cried and then Ohtze cried because rey is all alone and starving and bitter an’ she misses her mama and GAWD
  • GOD
  • MY EMOTIONS

Originally posted by thecoldmedicine

  • LOOK
  • LOOKLOOKLOOK>
  • PG 42, “somehow she managed to restrain her reaction o a single muscular twitch. sixty portions would feed her for… for…for  a very long time. time enough to do other work that had been long neglected. Time enough to relax and rest her bones. Time enough for – leisure was a word that had long ago been dropped fromher vocabulary.”
  • ^SEE. ALWAYS HUNGRY
  • pg 43, OHShit rey actually go through with it! like she actually sellin’ the bb for 100-fuckin’-portions! Rey is harsh. Also: “before agreeing to anything, it behoOved her to find out.”
  • WHO USES THE WORD BEHOOVED.  WHO. OHMY GOD
  • Pg 43, Uncle Unkar is being a creep n’ making digs about Rey’s size: “your audacity always has exceeded your size, rey. I’ve always admired that about you.”
  • So liek, on a scale from 1 ‘i-am-an-ant’ to 10 ‘I am ur aunt’s toy poodle,’ how smol do u think rey is? can we fit her in a tea cosie?
  • CAN WE PUT REY IN A POCKET, CUZ I FEEL LIEK SHE WOULD MAKE A MEAN-ASS POCKET PROTECTOR
  • PG 44, Uncle Unkar gets his creep on:
  • “that’s my girl” his tone oozed something more than false possessiveness. There was an eagerness in his voice that was something new even for unkar plutt
  • ugh, gross unkar. U are like a fish. Rey is not ur sweetheart.
  • Oh my god
  • Oh oh my god
  • Sweet General Gingerfuck, look at dis (pg 45):
  • “you are… you are…” the merchant tried to control himself. “you have nothing. You ARE nothing.!” “on the contrary,” she [Rey] shot back, “I just told you who I am. As to what I have, that would be my freedom and my pride.” Murmurs of assent rose from behind her, from the vicinity of the worktables. She had said aloud what her colleagues and compatriots, regardless of species, all wanted to say but dared not. At least not to plutt’s ugly face.
  • ^rey is literally THE plucky, pretty lil’ heroine from every harlequin romance EVER, just waiting to be ravished/”tamed” by The Man™. Like this is so blatant. Liek this is so harlquien. THIS IS AS HARLEQUIN AS HARLEQUINS GET (except for “throbbing manhood”)
  • see? SEE?
  • (pg 45) “it was all about the business, all about the profit. Never personal. Not even now, when it involved the lovely but disrespectful rey.”
  • ^SEE? HARLEQUIN.
  • Pg 47, finn rescues the po! This is good, but it is REALLY BUGGING ME how little time alan driver spends describing finn. Like finn is a main character! WHY U NEGLECTING HIM???? U DON’T EVEN DESCRIBE HIS PHYSICAL APPEARANCE, BUT U WILL GO ON FOR PARAGRAPHS ABOUT THE INTENSITY OF KYLO REN’S EYES?
  • UNNACEPTABLE
  • NO
  • NU
  • I WILL NOT CALM DOWN, DONT TUCH ME
  • So fin FINALLY gets a “name” –FN-2187, but this makes NO sense and the perspective hops around EVERYWHERE, cuz we NEVER have finn introduce himself by name, or set this up. Its just thrown in there, an’we expected to get it
  • Chapter ends with finn and po’ headin’ to the tie fighter. Very anticlimactic

FINAL THOUGHTS (LIL’BIT TIPSIER)

  • Rey is canonically tiny as fuck. Liek it keeps on being mentioned, so i think it safe to say that rey is smol. Very very smol, regardless of daisy’s height.
  • IS ADAM THERE JUSTTO MAKE REY LOOK SMALLER????
  • IS THIS A CONSPIRACY????
  • I WILL HAVE ANSWERS
  • Rey is a harlequin heroine. Watch, watch, lemme get out my harlequin heroine checklist:
    • Plucky? CHECk
    • Disrespectful? CHECK
    • Visibily feminine (but with tomboyish/wild qualities)? CHECK
    • Pretty? CHECK
    • Chastity/sexual purity at stake? CHECKKKKKKKKKKKK
    • The object of attention from a brooding, dark-haired, overly obsessive man (see: Kylo)?

Originally posted by avtogen-aka

CHECK, CHECK, AND DOUBLE CHECK MUTHAFUCKAS. WE IS READING A HARLEQUIN/ROMANCE NOVEL

Let us keep the convo goin!. Ohtze will be drunk-blogging until she drops.

Reasons why you should love 2NE1 part 1

I see a lot of hate towards girls and I don’t even understand why,so I did this~

They have badass songs about loving yourself 

I refuse to be compared

I’m telling you the truth

If we’re talking about my value,

I’m a Billion dollar baby

About times when you feel low and not loved

Don’t come closer

I don’t even want your concern

I want to leave away to somewhere,

I want to shout out

This world is full of lies

About girls who don’t need boys

Not lonely but I’m on my own, a stronger solo that’s my way

I won’t have no regret’s, that’s so yesterday so damn cliche

Boy you can try to pretend acting cool until the end

All you do is act a fool, you ain’t shit without your crew

About someone breaking your heart

Are we already too late? Is our love over?

Even if it’s a lie, please tell me it isn’t so

I can do better now, though we can’t meet again

I’m the only one in pain tonight

About you breaking someones heart

Baby I’m sorry, even when I’m with you, I’m Lonely

I must be lacking when it comes to love,

please forgive this person horrible person I am

I’m sorry, this is your and my story

I must not be worthy of this thing called love,

even though I’m by your side

About letting go your loved one

Without you I’m not happy,but I hope you’re happy

I’ll watch over you from afar

Without you I’m not happy,but I hope you’re happy

After putting all memories behind

About that sometimes its not easy

Don’t be so bright like that

Because the world is dark

How can I smile brightly (what?)

If you’ll look closely, I am sad

I know I’ve been there before

Not only songs,but they tell us important things like

There’s always a message in our songs. we want to let everyone know that there are people who sing about the power of women. We’re not saying to throw away one’s femininity, but to know that we’re not all delicate just because we’re women. - CL

All of us have times when we think we are ugly, but all of us have a unique beauty that others do not have. - Dara

Even if you can’t do it,do it until you can. There must be a way. - Bom

When things get difficult, we find people to lean against, when we lose our way, we sit on the ground and cry. People are children, living with hidden innocence. - Minzy

They show us that its OKAY to eat a lot!

I eat corn too much. I even eat corn flavored ice-cream. - Bom

Can we start eating plzzz.- CL (ig post)

That you need to love your body and not be afraid to show it

And even when they get judged for reavilling skin,they contnue doing it

And even after being called “slut” “fat”,they don’t care

And CL even appired NAKED in the mv,despite being called “slut” and “I don’t even have boner" 

CL showed us that being so called "fat” is not a reason to hide your body

And Dara showed us that being so called “Too skinny” is not a reason to hide you body TOO

And that you can dress feminine and boyish and BOTH IS OKAY

They show how imporant 2NE1 is for themselves

2NE1 is like just me. Like my own name.

My issue is “what can I do in this team?”

- Dara

I think its love…I mean about love 

We meant to be together.

- Bom

A team that is always fun with witty sense of humor. We help each other around a lot and help push each other to be better

-Minzy

I wanted to say thank you to the members.Im usually bad at expressing myself but we went through hard times together,and we got to now each other better and we spent a really long time together…I’m really thankful.I’m usually not good at mushy things like this,but I  really wanted to say it…To the unnies,thank you for following your young dongsaeng and our Minzy,she’s always so relieble.She has become a huge source of stregth for me and for that I’m thakful. 

-CL

And how much they’ve been through,but still smiled for US

CL has been bullied by koreans and even int.fans of kpop. She’s been called ugly,untallented,fat,selfish,attention whore,try-hard and etc. . Everything she does gets critisized a lot. People tell her to do P.S to get prettier. They joke about her beng “ugly” . They tell her to leave the group. When they worked with Will.I.am they said that she totally had sex with him and told her not to comeback to Korea. When she sat on Jeremy Sccots(he’s gay) lap they told her that she’s embarassing and totally slept with him and that’s why they are close. When she wore revealing clothes on stage they told her to cover up and called her slut. When she posted picture of her on the beach in swimsuit they’ve gone crazy and guys were telling her to cover up “cuz I don’t even have boner”. She gets so much hate,but continues to smile for us BJ’s

Bom’s parents didn’t let her to follow her dreams of becoming a singer. She learned singing and playing piano secretly. Her aunt helped her and send her to Korea to realise her dream.Bom has been rejected by all companies,and after 3-4 ears YG finally noticed her.But after Bom debuted her aunt died and she felt horrible,cuz she haven’t thanked her. When she debuted with Big Bang she’s been called ugly and people told her to do P.S. . Then after debuting with 2NE1 she has done P.S and people started to call her “plastic monster”. They bullied her so much that she stopped posting pictures. After finally she get to appier on variety show,this 4 years old scandal was revealed and she lost it. She liked it so much,but now she just decided to hide for some time.

Minzy was 15-16 when she debuted. She worked hard,but no one noticed her or even when they noticed her they called her ugly. She spent all her time training,she worked hard,really hard to be noticed by blackjacks. During their prootion her grandmother died and reporters were photograping her while she was crying. They didn’t show any respect and keeped taking pictures.

“Actually, I’m more upset by having no replies as opposed to hateful replies.I’d rather just think of everything positively.”

Dara got really popular in Philipines and earned a lot money,but her dad got all of her money and left the family and after got arrested. Dara lost everything,but she worked hard to make money for her mother and brother. She even posed in sexy photoshoot to earn money for her familly and after she got popular in Korea with 2NE1 people called her untalented and said that she needs to stop acting so childish,cuz its annoying. She works hard every day. She said "My issue is ‘what can i do in this team’ ”. 

anonymous asked:

you hate seth for the sake of hating him when he has done a lot of genuinely compelling satirical points on religion and the like. he's brilliant really you're just only looking at the fart jokes

woooooooooohoooooohoooo boy you are taking me into a dark place I really don’t wanna go down but i’m gonna go there anyway so buckle up and listen cuz i’m gonna lay out a whole lot of what frustrates me about this man. 

today we’re gonna talk about two episodes of television. Homer the Heretic from The Simpsons and Not All Dogs Go to Heaven from Family Guy, both episodes handling religion. Many know The Simpsons is one of my all time favorite shows while Family Guy is one of my most hated and you’re about to find out way

In The Simpsons episode Homer stops going to church with his family so he can continue doing things at home like sleeping in and goofing around on his Sundays instead. When he has a dream confronted by an angry God, Homer defends that he’s not necessarily renouncing his faith, just finding worship in his own personal means. It’s intriguing, relatable, and even has the same Simpsons brilliance in its comedy all the while 

“I’m not a bad guy, I work hard, and I love my kids…so why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I’m going to hell?”

God even seems open to this idea in his dream and agrees with Homer in their dislike over Reverend Lovejoy’s piety. In the end Homer’s house catches on fire when he falls asleep smoking a cigar and it’s ultimately his Christian neighbor Ned Flanders who sees the fire first and comes in to rescue him. Meanwhile the volunteer firesquad consisting of citizens like Apu (who’s Hindu) and Krusty (Who’s Jewish) arrive to help put out the flames. Marge and Reverend Lovejoy point out that in the end ALL these people with different religious beliefs saved his life, and suggested that spirituality was working through the hearts of each and every one of them despite the separate personal religions they hold. They’re all good people who all came together to help their friend. It’s a hugely open-minded and optimistic message of coexistence, acceptance, and that nobody is really wrong as long as they’re good people. It was an episode during the Simpsons prime that had all the elements that made them so brilliant. It poked fun at organized religion and brilliantly so, but it wasn’t anti-religion by any means. And it had the heart and humor mixed so brilliantly together that made the show amazing. it aired in 1992

Now we’ll look at the Family Guy episode. Obviously you can’t outright hate a show you’ve never even watched without reason, so this is one of the episodes i’ve seen through the years that has cemented the terrible taste it leaves in my mouth. In it, Meg finds religion as a Christian and immediately she shoves it down everyone’s throats and over-the-top in her hatred of anything pro-science and the like. It’s ridiculous. and this is not the only episode in which Seth portrays all believes as complete nut jobs. Near the end she’s shown burning a bunch of complex books on science before finally burning a counting book for first graders. Look at how fucking stupid theists are! Haha they can’t even comprehend simple logic of any kind because they believe in a God! Don’t they realize they’re fucking wrong! and what really makes it worse is that Brian’s defense, his DEFENSE, is that if there were a God he wouldn’t have given Meg a beautiful mother like Lois and made her so ugly. Wow! what a fucking liberating message to tell someone! Brian is supposed to be the hero preaching the truth in this episode and here he’s fucking saying that ultimately, that if you’re ugly and don’t hold up to the same standardized levels of beauty as everyone else then there is no religion and your life is miserable because of this factor. It also further adds to the absolute despicable treatment of Meg’s character that the writers fucking REVEL in so much because sophomore guys in high school laugh their asses off over family members shooting Meg in the leg for a quick laugh. Why are we supposed to sympathize with a character who could say such a despicable thing? Here you’ll find none of the more open-minded acceptance in the favor of judging a person’s character found in The Simpsons. Here anyone who believes is a complete extremist idiot that can’t understand basic logic of any kind and needs to be put in their proper place by the truth. There is no room for middle ground or having an open-minded take on it. In Family Guy it’s all black and white. You either have the same beliefs as Seth Macfarlane or you’re fucking stupid. 

Homer Simpson is an idiot and has always made several bad decisions. But his heart’s in the right place and he loves his family more than anything. He’s always willing to come around in the end and own up to his mistakes. (at least in the Classic era) Characters like Peter Griffin and Brian are loathsome, offensive assholes. They’re ignorant and treat other people like shit, but as long as they squeeze in one message at the end as the voice of Seth Macfarlane’s own personal beliefs, they get a pass and can go back to continuing treating Meg and Lois like garbage by the next episode. The fact that at one point he was in charge of 3 animated shows on FOX is disgusting 

good satire has an air of subtlety and realism in the points they’re making all while having a comedic bite. The Simpsons achieved this masterfully by treating their characters like human being with flaws but good intentions instead of crazy exaggerations as a way to say “they’re all like this”. Family Guy isn’t satire. It’s so obvious and unfunny in the points it tries to get across 

Seth Macfarlane is an obnoxiously ignorant, egotistical, and insufferable dickhead. and the fact so many people I know are fucking inspired by him makes me so sick