Levi’s taken to writing letters to his roommate in his biology notebook.
It’s not like he can’t talk to his roommate. They get along well, and Levi has no problem asking him for things. The letters aren’t angry letters.
They’re even worse than that.
The contents of the letters are nothing but idiotic drivel. Things a high school girl would write about her crush. “I love your stupid eyes.” “I love how you look when you come in after a workout.” “The smell of your shampoo and aftershave drives me insane.” Embarrassing stuff like that. On a weekly basis, Levi tears them out of his notebook and rips them up. Next thing you know he’ll be writing “Mr. Levi Smith” with little hearts around it. Pathetic.
(The name has a nice ring to it, though.)
Levi’s a freshmen, so a nice dorm room with some privacy is out of the question. His lot is a double room with barely enough space for both him and his roommate. It means two beds on opposite walls and two desks right next to each other, getting dressed and going to sleep in the same small space. Even if Levi didn’t want to know how Erwin slept or what he looked like shirtless, he would. He does.
(Erwin sleeps on his back, arms splayed, hair charmingly mussed. Shirtless, he looks like a god.)
Levi sits on his bed with his bio notes in front of him, studying. Whether he’s studying his notes or studying the other man in his room is up for debate. He flips over flashcards. His roommate leans back in his desk chair and stretches, muscled arms over his head, shirt riding up just the tiniest bit.
Levi flips to the back of his bio notebook and writes down, “You need to stop doing that. You look really sexy when you do that, and it’s too fucking much.”
Levi drops his notebook. “Yeah?”
“You want to take a break and get some dinner? I’m meeting up with Mike and Hanji.”
Erwin’s always inviting him to socialize with him. Levi almost always turns him down. Erwin doesn’t push, but he also doesn’t give up. He strikes the perfect balance between caring and respecting Levi’s boundaries. He’s so considerate it makes Levi want to tear his hair out.
“No thanks. I have to study,” Levi says.
“What are you studying?” Erwin stands and crosses the too-small room to glance at Levi’s notes.
“Bio. Big test tomorrow.” Levi looks at Erwin. He’s staring at something on Levi’s bed. His notebook. The notebook that’s open to a page with the words, “You look really sexy when you do that” scrawled across it.
Levi picks up the notebook and slams it closed.
Erwin raises his eyebrows. “Who was that to?”
“Are you seeing someone?”
Erwin tilts his head. He clearly doesn’t believe Levi.
“It was … a joke. It was sarcastic. A note for Hanji because they were doing something that looked really not sexy. That kind of thing.”
“You don’t have to make up excuses, Levi,” Erwin says gently.
The color drains from Levi’s face.
“If you want to keep your love life private, I … respect that,” he says.
Levi lets out a breath. Erwin doesn’t know the note was about him. His secret is safe.
“I’ll see you after dinner,” Erwin says.
“See you then.”
Erwin takes two steps to the door, then turns around. “I should tell you … I mean, I should say … Now may not be the time, but I …” He sighs and runs a hand through his hair.
“What?” Levi asks.
“I just want to say … that I completely respect whatever choices you make regarding your love life and I hope you’re very happy with this person.” Erwin clears his throat. “That’s all.” And he leaves.
Levi’s alone in his too-small room. He picks up his bio notebook, imagines that interaction going differently, and writes.