not even a little bit not even at all


(click to de-blur)

。゚ 。+ INKTOBER DAY 20: “deep” +。゚ 。

“deep - profound or penetrating in awareness or understanding, extending or situated far in from the outer edge or surface.”

took a less literal view with this one - have some deep space thoughts!


“I see.”

Harry murmured under his breath as he nodded even if he didn’t have the slightest bit of what you were saying as the last thing he heard was on how you fatigued you are, his eyes focused on the glaring screen in front of him as in truth, something better is the center of his attention.

He felt maybe just a little bit guilty that you’re saying these things to him that didn’t even sink over his consciousness, you being the one to not notice the big smirk on his face as you were occupied in letting out all the complaints you reserved to say in this FaceTime.

“And it wasn’t even when-…”

Harry hummed, tilting his head as his back’s pressed onto the pillow that served as the support to it as he’s sat upright on the bed, a grin on his face being showcased that made you stop.

“You’re cute when you’re frustrated.”

You breathed in deeply as Harry already catched the blush that’s present within your cheeks as you didn’t waste any time in going back to releasing your remaining pent-up stress within, him being the one to rest his head on his hand.

He wanted to take in every detail as he didn’t even warn you that he already took on what he thinks is already the tenth screenshot throughout the call, thankful that the hotel’s wifi processed the call that made you on the other side crystal clear, a grin on his face each time.

“Pretty eyes too.”

You let out a heavy sigh, a little smile on your face as you rested slowly against the bed with a knowing look, lips pressed into a thin line that tried not to show how maybe you’re a little amused.

“You weren’t listening, were you?”


Harry said through a grin as he did mean it seriously as he noticed the little irritated expression in your face that he wanted to fix, slightly pouting as he offered more words of apology that made you finally budge.

“Fourth. Fourth time that this happened, Harry,” you motioned, chuckling as Harry pouted as he’s a bit embarrassed that it repeated that many times, covering his face with a pillow as he groaned.

“S’not my fault you’re distracting!”

“Oh it’s my fault now?”

The rebuttal you provided made the both of you laugh, a feigned frown being provided too by Harry that made the situation all too heartwarming which the both of you wanted it to be at the moment.

There was silence in the middle of it, his hand rubbing his eyes as he swears he really misses you and wanted nothing else but to see you, even going to the point in where he’d ask for a video of you just doing anything as he’ll watch it until he falls asleep.

“All aside, I miss you though, love.”

Harry admits, he really isn’t a fan of detachment in some aspects but this toll just made him hate it all together.

“You have no idea how much I do too, H.”

He chuckles that sounds a bit pained, raising his phone so it could be pointed at the space behind him as he was so used to occupy less of it since he became so adapted to your sleeping positions.

“Even left a space for you here.”

Harry smiles, a little heavy on his part as he did want to go home but had a job to do as well, each day passing that nears to your visit making him a bit more excited everyday.

And he knows, for a fact, that he’ll be distracted again once he sees you as in the first place, it really isn’t a distraction since you are his focus and it’s the other way around, everything else being disregarded.

It’s the little things that remind Harry of you, whether it was a reference you made or a spot that you wanted, it was there with him.

Truth is, he never really forgets them.

And by the moment he sees you, whether through a screen or in person, it floods back in again, every statement becoming stamped into his mind and containing nothing else but thoughts that involved the future.

Love you.”

anonymous asked:

Is there like a "reverse" RSD? Like, I have RSD, and I get really hurt/upset by negative things (I legit use spite to cope), but also like, if somebody praises me, even a little, I'm like "YES THANK YOU WHAT ELSE CAN I DO TO MAKE YOU PRAISE ME MORE :DDDDDDD" I have superiors at work that I like that others don't so much, all bc they've praised me or acknowledged my work. (I'm joking a bit, but does this happen to other ADHDers?)

Yup! We’ve even talked about this recently. It’s definitely a thing. We need something to call it so I can tag it properly. Followers, what do you think? What should we call this phenomenon?


gh0ulboy  asked:

I would like to get into writing more but my depression has recently put me in a creativity block. What are your tips for overcoming creative blocks and continuing to make art even tho its hard?

i’m in kind of a similar place lately and trying to get over it! here’s a list of things i do to help me get back into the swing of things:

  • getting outside. it’s amazing how nice it can be to just be out in nature breathing fresh air and seeing different things that you might not see if you were just in your house all day. maybe you’ll see something that inspires you or at least clear your head a little bit!
  • move. whether this is going on a short walk, a run, or even just moving to a different room, it’s good to get a change of pace or new scenery.
  • read other people’s work or look at art. i personally like listening to spoken word (this guy is my favorite) and going through my art or poetry tag on tumblr. even just reading some teen fiction or going to a museum or something like that can be helpful!!
  • carry a journal with you to jot down inspiring things that come into your head! even if none of these ideas turn into anything it’s still good to have them with you as little concepts to be worked on in the future.
  • buy new supplies, if you can afford to! even just a new pen or a new journal can be nice.
  • sometimes i just have to force myself to do the work, even if i’m not in the mood. it’s good to get something down on the page, and even if you’re not the most proud of it, it can feel good to see the words or the sketch and feel like you did something.

and finally - something i need to learn to accept:

  • when you’re not in the mood to create or you have a creative block or you just can’t find the motivation, remember that you don’t have to, at least not right now. it’s easy to be impossibly hard on yourself as a creator but sometimes you need to take a step back and realize that the page will always be there, the words will always come back to you. take time to think and just be for a little while and i promise it will come back to you!

much love and good luck !!!!! 

anonymous asked:

Damn. Your "vague blogger" is one nasty piece of work. But I shoulda known that when she went on a bitter entitled rant over Martin's career, saying he basically shouldn't even be an actor if he didn't conform to her very specific standards on how to handle his career and promotion. That got an unfollow so fast. Ain't got no time for that negativity. You on the other hand are a lovely ray of sunshine and positivity and fun. I guess if you got jealous haters you are doing something right eh lol

Thank you for your support Anon! I wasn’t aware of that rant at all. I clearly don’t follow her and from time to time some friends tell me when they think that she’s talking about me and send me screen captures haha it’s funny cause i’ve never done anything to her ?? I am only trying to have fun in this place and forget a little bit of real life. I’ve even tried to be supportive and even tried to look past all that hate I get. But I guess it’s no use. 

As I was saying I wasn’t aware of such rant. I detest entitled fans!!! These people are adults and as ourselves (well myself at least), we know the decisions we make and the things we chose to do and not to do. I mean, as always whatever we write on our blogs is just our opinion and that’s it, it will hardly ever reach our famous person of choice haha and if it does, they will give 2 fucks. Martin in particular will tell you: MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS. And you know he will :P

If we know Martin we know he has done pretty damn well for himself, in fact he is highly esteemed between his colleagues and as he has always said - and since some people claim they are “better” fans than me should know this better - he chooses what he finds interesting and he doesn’t like all the Hollywood things. So if he doesn’t want to become something he is not, he won’t and we should be fine with that and accept it as we’ve always done. I love every moment when we get a photo with his fans and is always happy to do this, when there’s an announcement of some of his new work, when we read that he was seen having a coffee in Bar Italia or walking around Soho and he can do this and not be disturbed (sometimes haha) and he  - and he said this himself - is in a position where he can choose. 

He’s a big boy and knows what he wants for his life and career. Who are we to say that he’s doing things wrong when he clearly is so happy and relaxed as we have never seen him in … well… ever. He looks healthy, happy, and absolutely devoted to his work, he loves his fans (as we can tell), his kids, and he loves his life outside work, so how can we say anything negative? I find it SO selfish! You miss him? well rewatch his stuff, go to your own blog and look at it since day one, re-read his interviews, etc. I just can’t see it. If you don’t like his profile - meaning the way he handles his career - then you’ll have some decisions to make, because this is what you are going to get and not what you want. Take it or leave it. You know what i mean? I am 100% sure he gets hundreds of projects but he chooses not to do  because they don’t interest him at all. As he said in that radio interview when he was in NY, some actors can choose what to do, some others can’t because they don’t get so many opportunities so they have to get anything they can and some others just chooses everything only to be away from their house. We know exactly which kind Martin is. 

So after this long reply (i can talk about martin all day long hahaha), THANK YOU for saying those very kind things about me ♥♥ that’s so sweet and i really appreciate it, because it’s not nice to know someone hates you, but what can you do? i laugh and keep loving martin and all the people that like me and show me their love ♥♥♥  Again, THANK YOU. 

definition-of-awkward  asked:

Hey Berry, just wanna let you know I'm a fellow Shiro stan. I really wish our fandom wasn't so toxic, but what can we do, right? I'm also worried about OG Shiro and I'm super happy that Kuron/Ryou/Shiro?? got to pilot Black again. Basically my point is don't worry, there still are people who love and appreciate Shiro very much.

thank you! this is very sweet of you! i admit the fandom is a bit… yikes right now, but i hope Shiro stans can pull together a little bit and agree that (a) all Shiros are valid, even clone ones, and (b) it’s good to see any Shiro in the Black Lion’s chair, even if it’s not the OG Shiro.

personally i’m really really hoping we get actual Shirogane twins out of this storyline so let’s keep our hopes up!

Do you know what pisses me off the most about the dreaded “Autism Moms”?

Let me tell you, as an autistic adult who also was a main caregiver for an autistic boy (my brother). 

For the record:  I swear that if you use this post to say autism makes people violent and abusive, I will send 12,000 angry geese to flock in your bedroom and destroy every item that you treasure the most. AND I will eat the leftovers you had planned on eating for lunch tomorrow. Don’t you fuckin dare miss the point of this post. 

Listen up. I got a story for you.

Bit of background first.

My boy, my little hobbit, was born when I was ten years old. My mother left him alone with my grandparents and me. She legit abandoned him. 

My grandparents weren’t sure they could take him in. 
I begged. I pleaded. I asked as hard as I could to let us keep him and not give him back to my mother. 

Of course, they said yes. 

I dutifully became the protective older sister.

I would bathe him up until the week I left for college. I measured his medications and crushed them into his favorite yogurt. Blue, if you were curious.I made sure his food was perfect - french fries made just like he wanted, a chicken fry sandwich complete with his favorite McDonald’s sauce we bought in bulk.  
I went to his speech and occupational therapies several times a week, and practiced the things he learned. I went with him to his first day of school.

I even did a middle school project all about autism (which I am slightly embarrassed about, as I mentioned A$ in it ugh). I read all the autism books a 12 year old could find, and immersed myself in the Vanderbilt paperwork. I delved into the world of IEPs, visual schedules, and basic sign language.

And now, I’m still sending them resources and information on medications, papers for teachers, and going over doctor notes for him - despite being six hours away. 

(Of course, I was an undiagnosed autistic girl who also needed quiet. When I wasn’t needed to do these things, I was often in my room away from the loud television and people. I wasn’t a perfect caregiver, but I did do a lot.)

All of that to say: yeah, it wasn’t easy. But since when is raising a kid ever easy? I started looking after this boy when I was ten years old.

But here’s what infuriates me.

I read all the time about these autism moms who complain about how terrible their lives are. They say they’re afraid of being hurt and their lives are destroyed. Some even talk about killing their kids.

You know what?

Yeah, I got hurt by him or when helping him. I got bit, scratched, hit, and everything else. Usually it was just him being frustrated over lack of communicating his needs, so I was rarely angry. 
I ran after him when he went out the door straight for a lawnmower and I fell to the concrete. I grabbed him right before he ran into a street and ended up with my arm covered in blood.

I was kicked in the head and given a traumatic brain injury that requires me to now use a cane, and has caused a ton of nervous system issues. I even use a wheelchair part-time due to another condition that occurred afterwards. I’m only 20, and my health is pretty comparable to someone with congestive heart failure.

And you know what? 

I never in a million years thought about hurting my little brother.

I still don’t blame him. He was often overwhelmed, and had meltdowns. As an autistic person myself, I understood it - even if I didn’t know I was autistic at the time. (I suspected, but was too focused on other things.) 
I don’t know if I’ll ever get better health-wise, and that’s okay. I don’t know if I’ll get to run and dance again, or if there’s worse effects to come. It’s just what it is, and I’ve accepted that. 

He’s a child. It’s not his fault. He once asked me if it was, and I hugged him tight and said absolutely not. 

I say all this not to demonstrate how violent autistic people can be, but to demonstrate that I get where these autism moms are coming from.

  Again, for the record, autistic people are far more likely to be abused and assaulted. 

Remember how I said  I get where they’re coming from?

Yeah, that’s still not an excuse to be harmful toward your child. Ever.

You don’t give your babies bleach, shock them, or starve them. You don’t talk about them as if they’re literally a death sentence for you. And you sure as hell don’t want to murder your little ones. 

And if you literally want to kill your kid, if you would rather have a dead child than an autistic one, I have news for you.

You don’t deserve that child, and you better back up and understand this.

You autism moms need to stop. You need to listen. 

Your kids are going through a world that wants to “cure” them, force them into suffering so they can look “normal.” Your kids are going to spend their entire lives dealing with a world that is hostile to them. People try to assimilate us to save their own pride, at the expense of our own comfort and stability. 
Your kid is going to go through life being told that they should be literally “treated” with electroshock therapy because of their neurology. They’re going to be told that they shouldn’t reproduce. They’re going to be told that they’re not worth having space in this world. Your kid is going to grow up one day, and they’re going to hear this and internalize it. 

I know that, because that’s what I hear every day. 

You say it’s so hard to have an autistic kid?

Well, of course it is. But you know what?

Kids are hard.
They’re going to kick, hit, pinch, and everything else. Even neurotypical kids do that. I don’t know a single kid who hasn’t bit their caregiver or thrown something when grumpy. 
(I’ll say it again for those in the back: autistic kids are way way way more likely to be abused and hurt.)

When you have a kid, you sign up for this. You love that little one unconditionally, you protect them with all your heart. You give them support. You love that child even if they have a disability, especially when they have a disability.

You teach them that they are allowed to exist, that they are just as valuable and needed in this world like anyone else. We need all the neurodiversity in this world we can get. 

You teach your child that they’re not a burden. You teach them how to say no and that autonomy is often more important than compliance. You teach them that you love them, and that they will always have someone in their corner to back them up when times are tough.

I don’t care how hard you think it is raise an autistic child.

Trust me, I know full well it’s hard. Parenting is hard. It’s not easy, and it’s not always roses and fluffy kittens. That has nothing to do with having an autistic kid; that’s just a fact of life. 

The fear of getting hurt is valid. I can attest to that, and I don’t think I can downplay that. But that behavior is communication, and you have to learn how to read it. I did. You have to fight for better supports, for ways to make it easier on your kid - and by doing this, easier for you too. 

Sure, it’s hard.

But you know what? Your kid’s going to have it much harder. 


These are Matt and Lance’s reactions when they first meet Allura (and she literally falls into Lance’s arms might I add)

She’s obviously like really, really beautiful, that’s been established. And if from first glance these are regular boys’ reactions to her; you might think, hey, maybe if she fell into Keith’s arms literally romantic style he’d have an even more flustered and awe struck reaction…



Now you’re probably thinking, maybe Keith just isn’t into Allura like that because he doesn’t have romantic feelings for her. Well you’re right, but it’s also because he doesn’t have romantic feelings for girls at all LOOL.

Keith doesn’t have to be screaming into the void as a reaction to literally holding Allura in his arms like this, but he’d still atleast have some sort of reaction you know? He’d look even a little bit flustered. But he doesn’t, like, at all. 

His reaction is even literally the same when she’s not in his arms anymore

He gives 0 fucks to have just made contact with a girl even though Allura is clearly flustered/embarrassed

But then when someone like Rolo, who is obviously a male and most likely attractive (I’m guessing), comes into the picture doing literally nothing, just look at Keith subtly checking him out, his smirk and posture literally give it all away



Someone Else

“Honestly, Ginny, it’s not you-” Harry stopped in the middle of his explanation, realizing how stupid he would’ve sounded saying ‘it’s not you, it’s me’. Ginny narrowed her eyes at him, and Harry rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. He had known that breaking things off with Ginny would be awkward, but this was simply unbearable.

“Then what is it, Harry?” Ginny asked imploringly.

“It’s… I don’t really know how to explain,” Harry said truthfully. How was he supposed to explain that his once intense, romantic love for her had turned into a familial, brotherly love for seemingly no reason. The past few months had just been different. Instead of spending his free time with Ginny like he used to, Harry would now much rather spend that time in his dorm room, or flying, or hell, even studying.

“Is there someone else?” Ginny said calmly. She wasn’t upset; she knew Harry would break up with her from the moment she saw the rooming assignments.

“I- yes,” Harry said decidedly, even though it was a lie. Maybe it would be easier to pretend there was someone else. At least that way Ginny would get a reason. “I’m in love with someone else.”


“Draco Malfoy,” Harry answered automatically, and then bit his tongue. Draco Malfoy? Where had that come from? He wasn’t in love with Draco! It’s true that they had moved on from being enemies since they were assigned to be roommates at the beginning of the year, Harry would even say they were friends, but love? There was no way. Or was there? After all, Harry found comfort in his late night talks with Draco when neither of them could sleep, and he invited Draco to go flying with him nearly everyday, and he relished those evenings he and Draco spent holed up in the library, studying and researching ways to remove tattoos made of Dark Magic. So maybe Harry did love Draco, just a little bit. But that didn’t mean anything, because there was no evidence that Draco felt the same.

“I thought so,” Ginny replied, her voice cutting off Harry’s thoughts.

Harry’s brow furrowed in confusion. “What?”

Ginny shrugged. “You two are always together, and when you’re not, you’re talking about being with the other.”

“Sorry, you mean, both of us? You think Draco loves me back?” Harry couldn’t disguise the hope in his voice.

Ginny sighed. “It’s quite obvious.” Harry didn’t respond, just stared in stunned silence, so Ginny went on, “Did you know that Draco, Pansy, and Blaise have been taking lessons from Hermione and I on how to cast a Patronus? Yesterday, Draco was finally able to cast one. And his Patronus, Harry- it’s a stag.”

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♡ bts as boyfriends  [ jungkook ]

Originally posted by yourpinkpill

- pairing: jungkook x reader

- warnings: fluff with a bit of smut which has been made clear, please skip past if this makes u uncomfortable!

seokjin - yoongi - namjoon - hoseok - jimin - taehyung - jungkook

request/ask - masterlist

  • jungkook invented being a big fat SOFTIE who’s head over heels in love

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Mothers’ Weekend

Hello there! Long time, no see (my bad I know) but, here: an Alicia Zimmermann-centric piece as she goes to Parents’ Weekend during Jack’s freshmen year. [focus on Alicia, Jack, and Shitty] 6k

Somewhere, deep in her heart, Alicia Zimmermann knows she is a bad mother.

It started out as a worry, as maybe it does for all new mothers, that she will be a bad mother. That she won’t know what to do with a baby or a toddler that one day she will accidentally drop him or forget to feed him or feed him something he is actually allergic to or maybe she’ll scar him emotionally somehow and she worried but she survived his childhood okay. And then, after he was five or six, she stopped worrying about it. She thought she was doing pretty good. Jack had hockey and loved hockey and, sure, they didn’t have deep emotional talks but she didn’t exactly have any basis of comparison. Television families told her she was doing okay. No teenage boy wanted to have deep talks with his mother. And, look, if Jack didn’t talk to her all that much as he turned 12 and then 13, at least he was still talking to his father. Mostly still about hockey but she… she thought that had counted. Hockey was like French, to her. Another language she could understand but couldn’t quite speak. But Bob could. He was on top of it. Jack was taken care of.

She loved Jack. That was never the problem. The problem was that her love wasn’t enough. It didn’t matter. It didn’t alert her to any of the facts and maybe it even blinded her– She loved her son and her son loved hockey and so she loved hockey too. She loved her son and then her son seemed to love a boy named Kent and they never talked about it but she let Kent come over all the time and she figured they would discuss it at some point. She just… assumed everything was okay. Even after he was diagnosed with the anxiety disorder and given pills. It was always… well, that was a little problem but it’s handled and under control and everything is okay now.

See. Bad mother.

A good mother would have known somehow.

A good mother would have pushed and prodded or sensed it without even having to be told.

A good mother would have paid attention to how hard Jack was on himself. A good mother would have made sure her son had interests outside of hockey. A good mother would have known that Jack’s long silences after losses weren’t normal. A good mother would have preached balance and fostered friendships with different types of people and stopped the fucking hockey.

She didn’t though. Stop the hockey. No, not Alicia Zimmermann. She encouraged it. She went to the games and cheered the loudest and she even loved it a little bit because she thought it brought him joy, like his father. She bought into the vision: Jack playing hockey like Bob, the Zimmermann legacy continued throughout the ages…

God, she even used to tease Jack about how it took his father three years to win a Cup and she was sure Jack could manage it faster than his old man.

A good mother wouldn’t have done that. So, see, she’s always been a bad mother. Even now, now that she’s almost lost him, now that she’s promised to do better, now that she’s finally read all the books and online articles about anxiety and pressure and the danger of sports and hockey culture… now she’s still just as bad. Just for different reasons.

Now she is a bad mother because it’s Saturday afternoon and he’s been at Samwell for almost three months and she does not feel like mothers are supposed to feel in this moment.

She glances around. At the sea of other mothers and fathers crammed onto Samwell’s campus for Parents’ Weekend. They are not nervous. They are excited. Happy. Enthusiastic. Overjoyed to see the teenager they had left just a couple months ago again. To her right is a father almost (but not quite) breaking into a run to give his son a hug. To her left, a mother has burst into tears. Happy tears.

And then there’s her. She’s not excited to see Jack. Well, no. No, it’s not that she’s not excited. She is. She is. (She is. She repeats it once more just to remind herself). She is just…

She is nervous too. More nervous than she is excited.

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His Warmth (M)

Word Count: 3532
Member: Jimin x Reader
Genre: Fluff & Smut
Warnings: Cum-play, Biting, Lots of cute bc I’m in love with Jimin

It’s been two months since your boyfriend went on tour and you haven’t been able to see him, so when you unexpectedly wake up to him in your bed you just can’t seem to keep your hands to yourself.


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Quickie || Tom Holland || {Sequel to Tease}

Read Tease!

Relationship: Tom Holland x reader

Summary: Delayed interviews means Tom and you can have some time with each other. 

Warnings: S M U T (18+)

Word Count: 1948 words

A/N: this is like a sorta sequel to tease (you don’t have to read it to understand what’s going on though) I think I’m just gonna make it like a series of events sorta thing!!

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“I want to keep everything small. I even freak out when we go on TV sets and they push everything a little bit further out. I want it - I don’t want it to be all about me, you know, I don’t even want to stand too far forward from them, I want everyone to be on the same length.” 

Niall Horan, 2017

photo: x

so basically after the final battle, Stan doesn’t feel safe at home because his dad has loads of creepy ass looking photos on his wall, so he tries staying at Richies but Richie doesnt even like being there so why would Stan??? he doesnt want to bother Eddie and Bevs gone. Mike needs his own space and Bens a bit torn up bc of Bevs leaving. Stans been trying to avoid Bill bc he’s really fucking mad at him but deep down he doesn’t want to be anywhere else so its 1am and Stans luggin this small little backpack around with him and hes soaking wet because derry has the worst weather but all Stan can think is “fucking typical” and he doesnt even realise where hes going until he sees bill sat on the curb outside his house and his fringe is all wet and stuck to his forehead and his tshirts clinging to his chest and hes all sniggly and shivery and stans like wtf Bill why are you outside???

and Bills like “richie called me and told me you were looking for somewhere to stay and you were walking the streets” and stans heart is pinching and hes trying not to cry because its all getting overwhelming and he thinks hes falling in love with his best friend 

“that doesnt explain why youre sat outside, if you wanted to wait for me to turn up you couldve just waited in your bedroom” and when stan says this bill starts crying and he stands up and points to his window and bills like “thats where i was when georgie went missing, im not willing to lose somebody else i love too because i was too much of a pussy to come outside”

and stans crying too and he just hugs bill and bill kissed stans ear and tells him hes got really wet hair and stan laughs and they go back inside and just sit up all night not even talking just cuddling and holding hands and stan literally nearly throws up because he remembers that Bill said he loved him and hes happy and he feels safe for the first time all summer 


Safeguard | Grand Admiral Thrawn | Star Wars

I’ve been wanting to do a non-chibi version of Thrawn and a ysalamir for a while now.  I’m glad I finally got around to it!  :)

(more Thrawn fanart | more Star Wars fanart)