not amy's hammer

5

It’s weird. I’ve been thinking about him a lot lately, and then a few days ago he sent me a book he’s written. It’s violent and it’s sad. He called it Nocturnal Animals, and dedicated it to me. 

Nocturnal Animals (Dir. Tom Ford)

Éponine: Boy do I.

R: Éponine, I’m sorry about the Marius and Cosette thing, but-

Éponine: Let me tell you about Grantaire and Enjolras. Buckle in, kids, this is a bumpy ride.

R: Oh Jesus Christ…this is untrue and I didn’t particularly want them-

Éponine: Grantaire and Enjolras have been obliviously in love with each other for going on three years now. It’s painful to them, it’s painful to me, and it’s painful to everyone. They can’t get their shit together and everyone is fucking tired of it.

R: He doesn’t-

Éponine: Oh shut your mouth, Grantaire, yes he does! God, you’re an idiot sometimes. Let’s see what our dear viewers have to say about it, hm? Let me know if this sounds like hate here, guys, because if it does then I’m blind as a bat.

Éponine: Okay, guys so when Marius argues with Enjolras, Enjolras argues back of course, but he manages to stay calm and collected. At least somewhat. When Grantaire argues with Enjolras, they both wind up screaming and red in the face.

Éponine: When Bahorel is drunk on the ground, Enjolras makes sure that he gets home safely through someone like Feuilly. But when Grantaire is drunk on the ground, Enjolras is the driving force in the hellfire that gets him safely home and in bed. Followed up by multiple texts and calls to whoever tucked R in.

Éponine: And does Enjolras get mad at anyone else for drinking during the meetings? Joly? Bossuet? Courf? Nope. Just R. Huh, wonder where all those big feelings are actually coming from!

Éponine: Now let’s reverse the oblivious pining, shall we?

Éponine: Who harasses Enjolras into fixing his speeches? Grantaire. Does he do this for anyone else? Combeferre? Courfeyrac? Nope. Just our good ol’ chief.

Éponine: Who is it that will go a week without drinking to make sure that a poster that Enjolras has requested is perfect? None other than our good buddy Grantaire!

Éponine: And who’s name is it, R, that I hear coming from your room at night when I know no one is in there but you and your hand? Enjolras’.

Éponine: Sound about right, R?

R: …

Éponine: Thought as much.