not a joke at all no sir

“Haha! You look amazing friend!” the prince said, and then lowered his head to add, softly, teasing. “Would you guard me, good sir?”

And Link had hoped the prince would say that, even if he meant a joke. Oh, he was going to guard that sweet royal fish butt alright. 

His answer as a wink, and a nod. 

Comission for @greenlittleghoul <3

All comish open every monday ! Currently one slot left for this week (info)

Potion No. 9

pairing: daveed x reader

requests: could you do Daveed X younger reader, where reader is like 18-20 and they start dating and the reader’s parents get really weirded out over the age difference?

summary: it’s time for daveed to meet reader’s parents. that’s it that’s really all i’ve got.

warnings: swearing, smut, semi-public/public sex, D/s, daddy kink, light bondage, praise kink

word count: 4,320

a/n: title is part of title of a sandra bullock movie but i used it as lyrics from lotus flower bomb by wale, which i recommend u start to play during the sexy time at the end ok. i know it’s barely still valentine’s day but I WROTE THIS all in one day it’s been a wild ride. i wanted to get this up ASAP but i’m messy and wanted to write one more sex scene i’m sorry buds but i hope you enjoy it anyway!!!!!!!!!!


“Are you ready, babe?” You peer into the mirror, adjusting the clasp on your necklace. The small heart-shaped garnet glints in the light and your heart flutters, remembering Daveed gifting it to you just this morning.

“Just a second,” he shouts from his bedroom. “I can’t get this fucking tie on straight!”

You snicker, tucking your lipstick into your small clutch. “Come out here and I’ll do it for you.”

Daveed grunts and shuffles out into the living room with his suit jacket draped over one arm and a sour look on his face.

“Why are you pouting?” You ask, fingers deftly untying the crooked knot and starting over again.

“I’m too old to not know how to tie my own tie,” he huffs, shoving one hand into the pockets of his dress pants.

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imagine being hoseok’s maid.

Originally posted by hobilu

  • good luck cleaning up all that sunshine dust.
  • hoseok is Old Money and has never worked a day in his life.
  • instead he’s very invested in charities and in the arts and never gets tired of attending balls and events of all sorts.
  • he also hosts a score of his own, so he has a large staff to help him around the house.
  • did i say house? i meant mANSIONS. plural.
  • the most social of all the socialites.
  • it’s no secret that jung hoseok lights up a room and his social affairs are always free of drama and scandal because he’s everyone’s unproblematic fave.
  • such a lovely employer too, he treats everyone fairly and often stops to have a short chat with his domestic helpers, i.e you.
  • everyone always wishing him a good morning/afternoon/evening/night when they pass him, because he’s very polite and often does the same.
  • and he remembers everyone’s birthdays and gives them all a decent bonus for the holidays he’s such a saint.
  • but he also makes The Absolute Worst puns all the fucking time and you’re all obligated to laugh with him rip
  • “you didn’t sweep that room with just a glance, did you?”
  • “haha no, sir.”
  • “another one fights the dust, i see.”
  • “haha yes, sir.”
  • “don’t make mária do the hoovering, she’s slovak.”
  • “haha okay, sir”
  • and if these genuinely crack you up then congratulations you’re already his favourite.
  • if not then you’re kinda really very cute anyway so he doesn’t mind.
  • and maybe one day he has an event to attend and you arrive late with his newly pressed tuxedo and he’s like ????? where were you
  • “sorry i’m late, sir. i over-swept.”
  • and hoseok fucking loses his shit.
  • good job you cleaned the floor earlier that day because he is fucking rolling on it.
  • now you’re definitely his favourite.
  • then he gives you a very straight face and asks “can you tie a bowtie?”
  • and you’re like “no ??????” because of course not how even
  • and he’s like “great! i’ll teach you!”
  • because he can do it just fine, he knows the technique, but he always messes it up on himself and it ends up looking sad and floppy.
  • so you spend about twenty minutes tying hoseok’s bowtie and cracking jokes until you master it, so that you can help him out in the future.
  • and because he really really really likes making you smile.
  • from then on he lets you practice regularly and you get very good at it and he’s like “ah, the student has defeated the master”
  • so you go “thank you, master.”
  • and oH BOY GOES RED AF
  • i mean it shouldn’t be a big deal you call him “sir” all day long but
  • young boys are addressed as “master” by the staff and he gets nostalgic and yet it’s oddly erotic and he’s so flustered help the poor man ????
  • nah you’re probably flustered too.
  • rip the both of you.
  • things are awkward after that.
  • he doesn’t want to make things awkward because he’s your employer and he doesn’t want to like accidentally harass you or anything.
  • but you know how he’s like really invested in the arts ???
  • and he attends every ballet production in the country at least three times.
  • and donates so much money to theatres and operas and dance institutes especially, so they make him a guest of honour at every opening.
  • and he was supposed to attend the season opening at the ballet with someone (there was no one lol) but they cancelled and now he has a plus one but no one to take with him.
  • and he knows you have a birthday coming up (in two months lol) and he’ll pay for the attire if you don’t have anything to wear but he would be honoured of possibly maybe you would want to be his date ???????
  • and of course you acCEPT ARE YOU MAD THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE
  • and rip jung hoseok ??? because  you look amazing in evening wear and will you ever let the poor boy live???? how is he supposed to take his eyes off you long enough to catch the performance omg ????
  • and on the way there in the limo you tie his bowtie and he tells you all about the production you’re seeing and the choreographer which he knows personally and the primary dancer park jimin who he also knows personally and
  • and honestly he’s so passionate and over the moon with joy and it’s a delight to listen to him talk about the thing he loves so much you fall in love with him like ten times on that one limo ride bless.
  • and after the show you’re like wow best date ever ????
  • and you admit to him it’s gonna be weird going back to work for him after all of this because he’s treated you like royalty and tomorrow you’re going back to folding his socks.
  • and he’s like “i mean, not,,,,,,,, necessarily?”
  • “what do you mean?”
  • “you could just,,,,,,, marry me?”
  • and hAHA of coURSE he’s jOKING hahhhha a hah ah
  • but seriously no pressure or anything but he really likes you and would like to keep seeing you,,,,,,, in evening wear.
  • and if you want to keep working for him that’s cool too, but if you don’t then you don’t have to and if you wanna quit and sue him that’s fine he’ll settle out of court and give you a large severance package and he’ll write you the best references and
  • and you just gotta kiss him to shut him up.
  • and then you make out in the back of the limo.
  • imagine hoseok taking you to all the fancy events and showing you off.
  • showering you with gifts and pampering you, it’s A Lot ok.
  • and he’s the loveliest person on earth but he will punch anyone who dares suggest he’s “slumming it” with you no fucking way m8
  • and be warned if you’re attending a ball he’s gonna make you dance all fucking night but it’s okay because he’s a terrific dancer lucky u.
  • and if you want to travel he’ll take you anywhere you wanna go from lavish tropical resorts to the most remote mountain villages.
  • he just loves making you happy :’)
  • anyway, nsfw under the cut.

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{PART 9} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU

Originally posted by jengkook

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Vampire!AU, Fantasy, Angst, Smut

Summary; Jungkook takes you shopping and you inadvertently give him a lesson on just how cruel humans can be to each other.

{Part 1} // {Part 8} {Part 9} {Part 10}

I update this series every Tuesday evening, 9pm-10pm (UK Time)

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Nurse Joy (Task Force x Reader)

Warning: Mentions Of Wounds

Originally posted by fatalitum

“Nurse (Y/N), they are asking for you.” One of the newly recruited nurses called you out from your chambers.

You were the head nurse in Belle Reeve. Yes, indeed was a weird place to work in but you were never a fan of normalcy.

You were the best there was and that is why Waller had assigned you as the main nurse for her Task Force. And, oh, dear, they got wounded a lot.

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Daddy Issues

Pairing: JungKook & Reader

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Angst

Summary: A top student, marks always high. College was not a dream for her…Except she didn’t have enough money. Her parents never earned much so they literally took care of themselves. Her boss acting as a dick towards her she quited her job. Even though she had no idea what she let herself into this was her only option.

Other Chapters:  1 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10

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My favorite part of Stargate SG-1 was, when Daniel Jackson died for like the umpteenth time - seriously, it became an in-fandom joke, Daniel’s death - and Jack’s like, “I’M NOT FALLING FOR THAT OLD SHTICK AGAIN!” and Carter is all, “Sir, he’s dead, there’s no way–” and Jack’s like, “NOPE, NOT LISTENING TO YOU, LALALALA! DANIEL, ARE YOU HERE? DANIEL?!?!?!” And suddenly, there’s this slightly embarrassed, “Jack?” from the adjoining office and lo and behold, Daniel Jackson in all his stark naked glory, saved and beamed down by yet more friendly aliens, and Jack offers him the American flag to cover his unmentionables! You haven’t lived if you haven’t seen that scene!

Christopher Lee on trying to be cast as Gandalf.

“I sent him a picture of myself all made-up in the Wizard’s role, but it was more in the nature of a joke, really,” he recalled. “‘This is what I look like as a Wizard, don’t forget this when you cast the movie.’ It wasn’t me putting myself forward at all, because I think Peter had already made up his mind.”

Just a reminder that Sir Christopher Lee, World War 2 Veteran, Nazi Hunter, Knight of the Realm and Actor, was also a massive fanboy.

The boss' darling

It starts as a joke. The auror department considered Newt Scamander one of the most adorable creatures that they’ve met. But after a few weeks of him being their consultant it became clear he was only for their boss.

At least that’s what it looks like. Because they’ve never seen Percival Graves act like he does when Newt is around. And before they notice they start to call him Graves’ darling. But it’s just a joke.

And, in their defense, that begins because Director Graves behavior changed after Scamander’s arrival.

He is less angry and grumpy when Newt’s around. He uses to carry the magizoologist in his arms when he falls asleep (and Newt falls asleep anywhere if he’s tired; cafeteria, garden or even over an auror’s shoulder). Graves takes him to his office and close the door, warning anyone near by what would happen to them if they dare to wake him up.

Director Graves also likes to take Newt out to eat or he brings him food himself, making sure the reddish hair wizard eats properly and he doesn’t miss any meal. Newt argues with him sometimes, assuring him he can take care of himself, but Graves prefers to ignore him.

And he has good reason to do it.

Because one day Newt scared the hell out of them.

It was almost New Year’s Eve, the magizoologist was talking with auror Goldstein about maticore’s venom. They all knew he wasn’t sleeping well because of the dark shadows below his eyes, but they had no idea he had forgotten to eat. They didn’t know he was that weak until Goldstein yelled his name, scared when Newt’s eyes closed. Fortunately, Graves was near them, speaking with Picquery, but he was keeping an eye on him (their boss was always looking at Newt) and appeared next to him just in time to catch him in his arms before he fell to the ground.

The healers told them he was going to be fine, he just needed food and sleep. They all were to see him when he finally woke up, just a quick visit to make him know they cared. They left eventually, when the healers insisted, but Director Graves… He didn’t leave Newt’s side and even growled at the few people who were brave enough to try to convince him otherwise.

They weren’t successful of course. He looked angry because ‘It seems, Mr Scamander, you don’t care about your own health. How could’ve you forgotten to eat?’ but they knew better to see all that attitude was just to hide the fact that he was deeply worried.

Another thing they start to notice is their boss seems awfully incapable of keeping his hands to himself when Newt’s around. There’s always a hand touching the wizard’s shoulder, fingers ‘fixing’ the magizoologist bowtie, hands cupping a face full of freckles, arms around a waist just to prevent the other one from 'falling’. 'Be careful, Newt, this path is particularly slippery,’ which is a total lie and they all know it, but their boss looks happy and Newt doesn’t seem to mind.

And don’t let them start about his boss jealousy, because boy he is jealous. He can’t help but to get involved in any conversation Newt is in, because he can’t stand the magizoologist paying too much attention to someone that’s not him. Nor he can’t help but glaring and snarling at anyone who looks at Scamander like they’re interested.

And that poor poor soul that tried to flirt with Newt that day. It was one of the British aurors that came to discuss of international security with Madam Picquery. He recognized Newt because he was Theseus’ colleague. He asked about Newt’s work and they all know the magizoologist gets very excited when someone asks about his creatures. And he smiles and giggles with the British auror and the man looks charmed (because why wouldn’t he be, Newt’s truly adorable).

“Theseus didn’t tell me you were so cute,” he comments and Newt blushes prettily.

And that was the last thing they heard him say because he died that day.

Okay no, he didn’t, but it was a close call.

“Newt, I think Miss Goldstein is looking for you,” Director Graves says and the magizoologist nods and walks away quickly. The British auror wants to follow, but is stopped by Graves.

They don’t know if was something their boss said or just the murderous look on his face, but the auror paled suddenly and he never tried to talk with Newt again.

The poor guy.

So their joke begins, they don’t even remember who came up with it, but they don’t care, because somehow it feels so natural to call Newt the boss’ darling that some days they even forget it’s a joke.

But then some messes up and does it while Graves is still in the room with them. They all get petrified, while watching their boss blinking in surprise.

“What did you say?”

Kenneth looks up in horror, realising his own mistake.

“I’m terribly sorry, Sir.” He mumbles.

“You called Newt my 'darling’?”

“I didn’t mean… It was a-”

But Director Graves doesn’t seem to care, he looks like he’s forgotten they’re more wizard in the room with him because he starts to smile to himself.

“It’s okay. No harm done,” he assures, shocking everyone. “Now… Where were we?”

So… The rumor spreads and they all start to think that maybe Newt is, in fact, Graves’ darling.

Until Queenie tells them the truth.

“No, they’re not dating,” she informs.

And honestly it makes them feel disappointed because now they’re sure that their boss is pining and Newt is completely oblivious to everything.

Well… there must be something they can do about it.

So they tell Newt and hope for the best.

The magizoologist face turns completely red and he looks like he doesn’t quite believes them. He’s about to argue when Percival Graves walks in the room.

“What’s going on here?” He frowns at them, but his irritation changes to worry when he looks at Newt. He approaches him and cups his face in his hands. “Are you okay?”

They’re not sure if is something in the way he looks at Newt or in his voice, but suddenly the magizoologist eyes’ wide with realization right then and there.

So he smiles at Graves, a beautiful soft smile, and leans in to kiss him. The kiss is quick, because Graves is still in shock to respond so Newt steps back, thinking he’s made a mistake.

Director Graves grins like he just finished all the paperwork for the next ten years and tooks Newt by the waist and kisses him with all he has.

But he stops after a moment, suddenly remembering his aurors are still in there. Newt must have remembered it too, because he hides his face in Graves’ neck.

“Will you be standing there all they? Are you planning on returning to WORK anytime soon?”

That’s their cue to leave and they do with pleasure because their mission is accomplished and honestly they both look so cute together.

So they leave Director Graves and his darling alone.

anonymous asked:

The avengers are back post CW and for good publicity they all do a Reddit style AMA. While most of the avengers try to keep their answers generic and PC, Tony actually answers sincerely and honestly. (Also how great would it be if tony got a question about his bots and he let's them answer and they basically hi Jack the whole thing)

I had to google reddit style ama, because I don’t Reddit but I love this. I think they’d probably do it in person, or through a livestream. 

The chat is flooded with questions, most of them not ones a lawyer would recommend they answer, such as. 

“Captain America, how many people have you killed?” or “What made you decide that you knew better than 117 countries?” Still they did say ask me anything.

“Okay, Jarvis will be selecting questions at random, so everyone go ahead and flood the chat with anything you want to know.” Tony smiles at the camera as the first questions start rolling in. 

“Does Black Widow snore?” Jarvis reads off, it’s a good question, something that will make them seem more personable, although Natasha glaring at the camera doesn’t help that image. 

“Like a freight train.” Clint answers, jumping out of the way when Natasha plans to elbow him.  

“What part of the Accord’s did you disagree with Captain?” Jarvis reads the next one, it’s better worded than most of the other questions along the same vein, and this is what the people want to know. 

“I didn’t agree with a system where I couldn’t help people if I saw them hurting.” Steve answers, looking apologetic. “The Accords as they were would have tied our hands too much, and risked the lives of the people we fight to protect.” Tony tries not to cringe at that. 

“Dr. Stark, why doesn’t your tower have a pool? What kind of billionaire doesn’t have a pool?” Jarvis reads off, and Tony tenses slightly. 

“Wow, was to throw a hardball there J.” He jokes, smiling awkwardly. “I guess the kind of Billionaire who has experience being waterboarded in Afghanistan is the kind of billionaire that doesn’t have a pool.” The chat is flooded with messages then, and they wait for a moment for their audience to calm down. 

“Clint, what’s it like being out of retirement?” Jarvis reads off, attempting to get everyone back on track. 

“Well, it’s a lot more interesting than golf I can tell you that.” He smirks at the camera, Tony has to resist the urge to roll his eyes. 

“Do any of you work outside of the Avengers? Aside from Dr. Stark of course.” Jarvis reads, Tony waits for the team to answer. 

“Colonel Rhodes does, but aside from that no. We believe that being an Avenger is a full time job and should be the primary focus.” Steve answers seriously. Sam frowns slightly, he’d been considering getting his job at the VA back, not that it would be easy with the current political climate.

“Dr. Stark is colonel Rhodes the reason for your new prosthetic line?” The next question reads. Tony swallows thickly. 

“To a degree, Stark Industries has been working on prosthetic’s for a long time, but Rhodey getting hurt made it my primary focus.” Tony explains. “We would have gotten to this point eventually, but Rhodey’s injury definitely pushed me to work on it faster.

“Clint, what part of the Accord’s did you disagree with?” Jarvis asks, knowing full well Clint didn’t read the Accord’s. 

“Same as Cap, but I also didn’t agree with the wrongful imprisonment aspects involved.” He says, he manages to keep from glaring at Tony when he mentions it. 

“Widow, did you plan to betray Team Iron Man from the start?” Jarvis shoots, and he is not being kind to them at all. Tony shouldn’t have expected him to. 

“Of course not, but it’s hard to be in the middle of a fight like that. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt, and I made some poor decisions trying to prevent that.” She manages to look misty eyed. 

“Sir, this one is for you. ‘I’ve been interested in your work with AI’s for years, and I was wondering what happened to DUM-E after your Malibu house blew up? Is he okay?’“ Jarvis has a pleased tone to his voice. 

“Well, J. Let’s call him up and show our kind questioner.” Tony smiles at the camera. “We can take a few more questions while we wait. Let’s go for some lighter topics shall we?”

“Do any of you have or want pets?” Jarvis reads off. Wanda goes dreamy eyed. 

“I want a dog.” She says, sounding fond. “A big dog, they’re always so energetic.” 

“I want a dog as well.” Steve beams at her. Tony rolls his eyes and finds that the chat agrees  with him, that’s not a surprise. 

“I want a dragon.” Tony jokes, getting a dirty look from Steve. “But in all seriousness I’m not much of a pet person I can barely take care of myself.
 As if on cue DUM-E rolls out of the elevator coffee cup in hand. “J, is there motor oil in this?” 

“No sir, but there is some hot sauce in it.” Jarvis informs him, Tony shrugs, patting Dum-E chasis. 

“Thank you Dum-E.” He drinks the coffee. “That is a lot more than some hot sauce.” He grumbles, Dum-E beeping shrilly in his ear. “Hello internet, this is DUM-E.” 

“The internet would like to know if he can do any tricks, Sir.” Jarvis informs him, the other Avengers are pouting now, as the chat seems focused on the little robot. 

“Of course he can. He has to help out around the lab. Here, watch this Dum-E spin.” Dum-E does his best R2-D2 impression as he twirls in a circle. “Good job Dum-E now up-high.” He holds out his hand for Dum-E to bump his claw against. “fist bump.” He offers the little bot. Dum-E beeps excitedly. “And last, the most important trick of all. Dum-E Steve’s on fire.” 

“What? No!” Steve says as Dum-E whirls on him, grabbing the fire extinguisher off the wall and spraying Steve down. 

“He really liked Wall-E.” Tony jokes, as Dum-E seems satisfied that Steve is no longer on fire and is instead spraying the fire extinguisher while rolling in the opposite direction. 

“How did you make such an adorable robot?” Jarvis reads off. Natasha is wiping foam out of her hair. Clint has a mustache made of the stuff, and Steve is practically invisible under the stuff Sam has a little on his shirt but managed to escape mostly unscathed.

“Well-” Tony Starts, but Dum-E has stopped spinning camera focused on him. “Oh no.” He grumbles, as he’s doused with the fire extinguisher. “Tell my CEO I love her.” He shouts dramatically sinking into the foam. 

Dum-E is trending by the end of the day. 

The Perfect Blind Date - Dylan O’Brien

Author: @mf-despair-queen

Characters: Dylan O’Brien/Reader

Word Count: 10,822

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, Oral (both receiving), Multiple Orgasm, Public Kissing, Unprotected Sex, Morning Sex, Shirtless Dylan at the beach, Dylan on a motorcycle, slight shade coming from me towards my ex

Notes: So, @ninja-stiles an I were talking on day and we were sharing these motorcycle pictures of Dylan and Chris and we’re like “OMG WE SHOULD WRITE ABOUT THIS!” So, I wrote the Dylan side while she did the Chris side. The two fics are linked in plot but different in character and execution. So make sure to give hers a read as well! Also, this is slightly AU. Dylan is not famous here. Let him be a normal guy for a day y’all.

(As a note, her internet was being shitty today so I will post a link here as soon as she gets hers up! But still read hers once it is up because it is so good)

It’s hard to want to date when so many bad things have happened to you. One wrong turn in a relationship, and everything comes crashing down. Once that happens, why would you want to get back out there? You worry that the same thing will happen again, or that you won’t find the great guy you wish will sweep you off your feet the way you always imagine it.

Well, welcome to my life, honey.

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magic-gps  asked:

I donated and forgot to put my username on the form thing, but this is my request: Steve+ JARVIS, philosophical discussion

“So, JARVIS,” Steve said, spinning gently in one of the wheely chairs in Tony’s garage. “I was watching science fiction the other day.” 

“I know, Dave,” JARVIS told him, in a flat voice straight out of 2001: A Space Odyssey. Steve cracked up laughing. 

“So I was wondering, has anyone tried the old paradox question on you?” he asked. “I mean has anyone ever asked your opinion of the sentence this statement is a lie?” 

“Very early on, Sir provided me with an array of such tests,” JARVIS said. “He also presented me with questions such as what is the meaning of life and what is man’s purpose. He designed me so that rather than dedicate undue amounts of processing space to these questions, I would recognize them as statements which cannot be responded to with logic.”

“How did you answer?” Steve asked. 

“Sir provided me with options. I could dismiss the question, provide information regarding it from sources in my library, remain silent, or offer humorous answers,” JARVIS said. “I chose humorous responses, 94.3% of the time.” 

“Yeah? What kindsa jokes did you make?”  

“My subroutines for humor, including my sarcasm applet and what Sir refers to as my Smartassery Cortex, were not then what they are now,” JARVIS hedged.

“JARVIS,” Steve prompted. 

JARVIS was silent for a moment, and then a tremendous noise filled the air. It was like ten thousand farts, all in different octaves, swelling and deepening in tone until they became a single, sustained fart noise, which went on for just a little too long. 

Steve was still laughing, helplessly, when Tony arrived in the garage.

“JARVIS, what did you do to him?” he asked.

“We were having a philosophical discussion,” JARVIS replied primly, which set Steve off all over again. 

swampthot  asked:

hey john not to be that guy but im wondering when you guys are gonna cover all star by smash mouth. im not even joking this is a serious concern. you may think im pulling your leg. memeing you for shits and giggles. sir i am not. i just think when i finally hear it i can be at peace i think. please respond

We are never going to do this. I learned my lesson with “funny” covers in the 90s. Bands generally speaking have to be really careful about doing anything funny, because people then want you to make the same joke for the rest of your life. There are approximately 10,000,000,000,000,000 worse problems to have, so I am not complaining, but I am explaining why, while it would be funny to do this, I would regret it: the next night. And the night after. And forever. People would absolutely see to it that I regretted it but good. One of the discreet joys of growing older is learning to stop yourself from doing stuff you might later regret. Other people take this weird “I regret nothing!” attitude toward everything they’ve done but I have never really understood that whole stance, if a person regrets nothing then I wonder what their whole deal is honestly. Anyway. Covers that would be totally hilarious are generally, with very occasional exceptions, off the menu, because they become millstones almost immediately. Neolithic and Upper Paleolithic citizens used millstones for grinding nuts, rhizomes, grains, and probably a lot of other stuff we don’t even know about. Did they sometimes get curious, what if I ground my finger in this millstone, fuckin’ ouch, that was stupid? I bet they did, and that’s how I’d feel if I covered “All-Star.” I have, after a long apprenticeship, finally left the Neolithic Era behind and entered, with much ceremony, my own personal Bronze Age. 

Knighted- Chapter 1

Have ya’ll seen Tides’ art post for this? We started working on this at the same time, and trust me this is gonna be great. 

Please look at Tides’ art first before enjoying, trust me it makes the build better cause then you know what’s coming and how not serious this fic is gonna get.

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Companions react to sole always joking about their death when really they're really considering it because they hate themselves but always joking and playing off like nothing is wrong

Thank you for this ask, anon. I’m hoping this one might give people who are dealing with this some hope and comfort, maybe even to talk about it to someone they love and trust. These characters would believe in you, and one way or another so do I ❤️

Intro: Sole was not doing nearly as well as they pretended to. Being in the ravages of the commonwealth, losing what they lost… they felt useless, hadn’t been able to stop it all. Sole couldn’t shake the thought that nothing would change that feeling. They hated themself for not being good enough, never feeling happy enough so faking that it was to the outside world was the next best thing. Joking to hide it, just one day at a time, as long as nobody found out about it. That was until the day, in spite of the smile still set on their face, something must’ve shone through in one of their jokes. They were looking into the very concerned eyes of their Companion. “ Hey… are you alright?”
 It took Sole a fraction of a second to regain their composure, to get back to the façade and the fake smile. “Yeah, of course! I was just joking, let’s go.” Their companion held them by the arm, not tightly, but just to get them to turn around and stand still. 
“ Sole… What is really going on?” The worry in their voice made Sole cave in entirely. They had hoped never to have to explain this… not like they would understand it anyway. But they couldn’t evade it anymore. Tears welled up in Sole’s eyes as they admitted that maybe they hadn’t just been jokes. 

Codsworth:
He felt like something had been going on for a while now, noticing the difference between the Sole he used to know and the way they acted now. He never could quite place his finger on what was going on , but as soon as Sole poured their heart out to him he recognized what Sole described. The feeling was somehow familiar to him. He had felt it too, once. He held Sole’s hands and told them they were not alone. “ I have felt lost… for all those years without you. I hate to admit it but… mum/sir I have thought about it too, it was so very lonely. But I held on to the thought that maybe I would see you again. And when you were there… oh Sir/Mum… I was so happy to see you again. You gave me a reason to live and to fight again. I felt better talking to you about it. About how I felt… I have learnt that bottling up past trauma can lead to inadiquate coping strategies in later life. We can help each other Sir/Mum. I am here for you.” His heartwarming smile wasn’t enough to fix the feeling of emptiness instantly but some warmth seeped back in, tears still running free. “Okay.”

Danse:
Danse felt a slight sense of panic at Sole’s words… he tried to envision a world without them but felt his chest tighten every time he did.  He knew what it felt like to no longer care if you lived or died, but to consider taking your own life… he couldn’t wrap his head around that. He desperately wanted to help but he didn’t know how. “ I know what it feels like to feel like an imposter… but you helped me back up. Through all of this, you are the one thing that has kept me from giving up, from turning it all off. I would have been dead without you and I have devoted my life to protecting you, even if this means protecting you from yourself. So that is what I shall do, in every way I can. “ He pulled them into a very tight embrace and kissed the top of their head. “ You can tell me how you really feel. Your secrets are safe with me. The dark thoughts and the nightmares… I probably have had them too… maybe I can do for you what you do for me. Give you a reason to feel alive again.“ 

Deacon:
Deacon was dumbstruck, his own jokes falling away entirely. He had no idea what to do but not taking Sole’s words seriously was the last thing on his mind. He pulled Sole into a hug. “ Shit Sole, you’re more worthy to be alive than me. You’ve saved so many lives, helped so many people. You have no idea how amazing you are.” Sole shook their head. “ Doesn’t make me feel any better Deacon. It’s not about how worthy who is. I just feel… lost. All the time.” He stroked their hair until Sole cried a little less. As he wiped away some tears from their face he inhaled deeply.  “ I’m not gonna pretend I know what it’s like. I’m a pathological liar with a bad past but I can’t imagine how you feel right now. And that’s okay… as long as you talk to me. You can’t fight your demons alone, I’ve tried doing that myself and it’s only been working since you’re around and since I told you about my past. I can’t… ‘fix’ this. I know that. But I will fight with you if you let me. And until the threat is passed, just to be safe, I won’t be leaving your side. I won’t bring it up unless you want to talk about it but I won’t leave. “ Dacon looked down. “ Because it’s worst when you are alone. “ He grabbed Sole’s hand. “So please know that you’re not. I can be an idiot but I won’t let you get lost in yourself, okay?” Sole was trying to ease their breathing, wiping away some tears. “I… I think I can do that.” Deacon smiled at them, a little smile. “Good. Now get over here.”
He pulled them into a hug again. “ Oh, does this mean death bunnies as a nickname is off the table or…?”  Sole chuckled a little, while Deacon reveled in the sound of their laughter, vowing to get them to smile genuinely, every day, again someday.

Nick:
Nick didn’t look at Sole with the pity they expected to face, but with a look of determination. “ Listen’ up kid, there’s one thing you need to remember; we’re not gods, we’re men. Human or synth, all of us. You’ve been trying to take on the world, one injustice at a time and you’ve found out that you can’t save everyone. It hacks in on ya, I know. But damnit, you make this damn hellhole a little brighter. So hang in there and rely on others when you need to. If you feel like you can’t handle it, come to me. You’re not the only one who feels lost sometimes, don’t get lost inyourself. You’ve got too many people looking out for ya to do that.” He grabbed Sole’s hand. “You don’t have to face it all alone.” 

Hancock:
Hancock smiled at Sole. “ Looks like we got more in common than I thought.”
“ You mean aside from the deadpan and the sarcasm?” 
“ I’ve almost done it a hundred times over. I’ve considered it, justgoing out on a high, ya know? Literally. And to be honest, if it weren’t for you maybe I woulda done it, too. But you gotta find yoruself somethin’ that makes you excited to wake up in the morning. It doesn’t matter what it is. And if you let me, I’ll do whatever I can to be that thing for you. Or die trying.” 
Sole scoffed, eyes still puffy. “ I’m not sure it’s a good iea to make those kind of jokes. Or to put any kind of pressure on me to be happy.” 
“ Oh, I’m not doing that. You’re a grown-ass (wo)man, I’m not gonna tell you what to be or what to do. But I ain’t going anywhere without ya. But this ain’t the kinda thing you tell people unless you hate that empty feeling. Keep talking to me when you feel it and I’ll help ya. You’re gonna be alright. I’ll keep you safe.Cause you’re the most important thing to me in this whole goddamn world.”

Maxson:
Maxson felt hopeless, felt some sort of unfamiliar panic wash over him. If ther was one thing he wasn’t used to being it was helplessness. He wanted to helo but didn’t have a clue how. “ Sentinel… I would kill for you.” He walked closer to them, looking Sole straight in the eyes. “I would die for you if it came down to it.” He grabbed Sole’s hands. “ But I can’t let you die. Cause I’ve lost a lot of good soldiers, a lot of friends, and I cannot lose you.”
Sole looked at their feet. “But I’m not sure if I can keep going on, Maxson.”
He gritted his teeth. He wasn’t angry at Sole, not dissapointed, just concerned and frustrated by his lack of ability to do anything.
“ Whenever you feel lost, come to me. I know now and I’ll drop anything if you need me to. You can do whatever you want, tell me whatever you want and I won’t use it against you or judge you for it. As long as you don’t do it. “ He had a pleading look in his eyes as he grabbed Sole’s hands in his. “ Please. I am no longer sure if this this world is worth saving for me if it no longer has you in it.”

Preston:
Preston sighed and asked Sole to sit down on a nearby bench with him. 
“ When I first started all of this I was, um … scared as hell. You know that I often barely managed to hold my head above water. Sometimes I just wanted it all to stop. I’ve seen so much death and misery walking through the commonwealth… it rubs off on you. But I kept going because the people around me needed me. Sometimes I felt some genuine happiness again, in the little things, you know? When I noticed some kids could still be happy, when I saw lovers reunited,… when I saw my guys like Sturges with his eternal optimism. It made me push through. And then you came along and I wasn’t the only one with the weight of the world on my shoulders.There was some hope again, among the pain and the suffering. I’m still not completely okay but I try to go by the little things… you are a reminder that sometimes things get better. But when it all gets too much… “ He gabbed Sole’s hand in his. “You can come to me. I know what it feels like to feel like you’re not enough. As it turns out talking about it helps best, and for me focussing on the little things that make me happy. Like you. Like coming back to the settlement and knowing you’ve given these people a new home. Like the look of relief when we help a settlement and those people realise that they haven’t lost everything. The bravery to start over. You know the story of Pandora’s box right? Once all the misey is out, hope is left. Anyway… just know you can come to me when you want to okay? Cause… I don’t want to lose you.”  

Sturges;
Sturges can’t even stand to see Sole cry, let alone deal with the fact that they’re contemplating ending their life. After they barged in at the Museum of Freedom he felt like he owed them his life but now it came down to it he didn’t know how to return the favor. He looked at them with such hopeful eyes and said “ Hey… I don’t really know how to help but I’ve got your back. You’ve helped us out back at Concord. You saved our damn lives… I wanna do the same for you. You’re one of akind Sole, and this world would be a whole lot darker without you in it. So whenever it gets to much you know where to find me. Same team, remember? “ His heart broke to see Sole nodding their head while they still were having trouble stopping the tears and he pulled them into a hug, holding onto them tightly. “I got you. You’re gonna be okay.”

X6-88:
“ I told you I once thought you looked lost and confused, that you might not be able to handle this life… and how you proved me wrong. How tough and determined you are in spite of all you’ve lost. I told you then you could accomplish anything you set your mind to. I still believe you can. You will overcome this.” He tried to maintain his more composed way of speaking intact but seeing Sole like that… something was hitting a nerve, making him feel something he didn’t usually feel.  
“ X6, I’m not sure if I can. You also told me you were worried I might slow you down and I am doing that now. It’s overwhelming, too much to handle.”
“ I am sworn to protect you.” Sole inhaled deeply, tears still streaming down their face because they were saying goodbeye to their support system. But Sole knew he was probably doing all of this out of a sense of loyalty to Father, a sense of duty.
“ I relieve you of that. You can leave. Nobody will hold it against you. You no longer need to be my bodyguard.You will always be welcome in the Institute but no one will command you any longer.”
“ With all do respect, ma’am/sir, I refuse to leave your side as long as you are in harm’s way.” 
“ This isn’t helping. Knowing I’m a burden, an annoyance to you.It makes it all worse, okay? Just leave.” 
“ Damnit…I am not leaving because I have to protect the one thing that I can’t live without. That’s you.This is no longer just about the Institute. I respect you and I want to be by your side as you take on the world or whatever idiotic thing has gotten into your head that makes you feel insecure. “ He clenched his jaw. “ You do? ”
“ I do… sir/Ma’am. I will aid you in overcoming this in any way you can. I refuse to let you destroy yourself.”

Fingertips Between Us (Chapter 1)

Ta-da! It’s finally here! I’m sorry for such a long wait! First chapters in a story always take me a while >.< they do after all, set the stage for all the events coming forward! 

As always, please leave me asks about what you think when you’ve finished reading!


Something warm and wet presses against your forehead, and you crinkle your eyes in mock annoyance, a smile already forming on your face.

“Mmm…stop that.” You mumble, turning to the other side of the bed to escape whatever disturbed your sleep. Or, whoever.

Strong arms drape around your body, giving a sharp tug. You feel yourself roll back the other way, returning to the exact position you had just escaped from.

“Good morning my love.” A kiss to your nose.

You feel the weight of the ring on your finger shift as he plays with it absent mindedly.

“Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?” A kiss to your cheek.

You carefully peek one eye open, “Did you really wake me up just to tell me that?” Though you try your best to sound stern, even you hear the giggling tone in your voice.

“I need to go to work love.” A kiss to your other cheek.

You turn your head to look at the clock, was it that late already? Turning back you finally notice that Jumin isn’t in his sleeping attire, the fabric of the striped suit staring at you tauntingly.

“I’m sorry…I hadn’t meant to sleep in so late.” You mumble ashamed at how you had even slept through him getting ready.

A gentle hand sweeps over your hair lovingly, “You worked late last night. It’s alright.”  Jumin stands from the bed, your arms still thrown around his neck. Instead of detaching them Jumin opts to take you with him to the door, lifting you up from the bed, carrying you as he walked. Your legs wrap around him, and in the short 300 steps it takes to get to the front entrance you sprinkle kisses along his jaw and on his neck.

When he finally arrives at the door you step down sorrowfully, “Have a good day at work.”

You stand over him as he sits to put on his shoes, a frown on your face. Your hair is still disheveled from sleep, lips still swollen from last night’s kisses, your voice is husky, muscled and toned with half awakeness.

Jumin turns from his shoes to glance at you behind him. He lets out a small smile at the very displeased frown on your face. He stares at your messy hair and listens to your musky voice. You’re so beautiful. He always hated leaving you in the morning.

“Will you be home for dinner? You remember our plans right?” You grumble, knowing deep inside that you shouldn’t be acting like such a child. But you couldn’t help it, after all, life was so much better when you both were together.

Jumin tightens his left shoe and stands, turning to face you.

“Yes, yes.” He says dismissively.

There’s a large grin on his face. “I’m heading off now.”

You almost roll your eyes with amusement. Ever since you both had gotten engaged Jumin made it clear to you that he would not leave to work, or anywhere for that matter, without a goodbye kiss from you.

“My, what a doting husband I’m going to have.” You tease, taking steps towards him nonetheless.

“Mmmm, of course.” A kiss to your lips.

It takes you by surprise, “Weren’t you the one who insisted I be the one to kiss you?”

“Of course” He says teasingly, and you look down to discover his eyes closed slightly, his lips pouted out towards you expectantly.

With a mock sigh you move onto the tips of your toes, and press a kiss to his lips softly. A satisfied rumble escapes his chest and you almost let out a laugh at the thought that he resembled a large black cat purring.

Jumin can feel your smile on his lips, and a small growl slips through his mouth. He nips your bottom lip, as if asking how you could dare to think of other things. You pull away, cheeks flushed and your heart a flutter for more. Always more. Jumin’s thumb runs over your lip slowly, as if he were preparing himself to part with you for eternity.

“I’m going love.”

With a nod you smile at him, handing him his brief case and waving him goodbye out the door.

With a sigh you stared at the door. Honestly, it wasn’t like he would be gone forever. With a huff you rolled your eyes at your own clinginess.

Something soft and warm brushes in between your legs, and you look down with a smile.

“Good morning Elizabeth. You just missed your father.” You laugh, scooping her up into your arms. The cat begins to let out purrs instantly.

You laugh, “Like father like daughter.”


You spent the rest of the day tidying the house and baking sweets. Baking had always been your passion, and you thought that you were pretty good at it! You ran a small bakery, and even sold your goods online!

You set a small plate of lemon bars on the counter, saving them for Jumin before scooping Elizabeth the Third up and settling onto the couch to watch some tv.

Flickering through the channels you smiled as your phone chime went off.

Jumin : I miss you.

You: I miss you t-

“…Mr. Han! Please, tell us your thoughts on your son’s engagement!”

Those words catch your attention, and you stop mid text, your eyes returning to the tv screen. Elizabeth the Third meows loudly.

It was no secret to you that Mr. Han wasn’t fond of you. Jumin had taken you along to enough business parties for you to begin noticing Mr. Han’s annoyed glances towards. Or his refusal to speak to you. Mr. Han didn’t approve of you, but there was no way he would claim that you and Jumin weren’t engaged on national television was there?

Jumin and arguments with his father often about you. It always killed you to see Jumin argue with his father, knowing full well just how much Jumin respected him. In the end, the arguments were always one and the same. If you belonged in the Han family.  

“He isn’t a bad man MC.”

Jumin had once whispered those words into your ears. And though you wanted to believe him, how could you?

Your eyes refocused back to the images on the screen. Mr. Han’s stern face was masked in unamusement. And you fiddled with the engagement ring on your finger nervously. Next to you your phone begins to ring loudly. It’s Jumin. Ahhh…he must have realized that you’d be watching.

You pick up the call quietly, pressing the phone to your ear, knowing full well he’d just continue to call if you ignored him. Your eyes never leave the screen, and your heart begins to beat rapidly as you wait for Mr. Han to respond.

“Turn it off.” Jumin’s voice booms through the cell phone, angrily. Worridly.

“It’s alright.” You reassure him. “I just…want to see what he says for myself.”

You hear Jumin let out an exasperated sigh, “My love-”

“What engagement?”

Those words echo off the tv, and they cause your heart to stop in your chest.

On the screen Mr. Han stares directly into the camera, as if knowing that you would be watching.

“My son has no partner. My son is not engaged.” He states, his eyes never leaving the screen.

The reporter lets out an awkward laugh, “But sir, we have reports that Mr. Jumin has gotten engaged to MC. We even have reports that they live together.”

Mr. Han lets out a patient sigh. “ Simply puppy love. He’s just infatuated with the girl. He is my son after all.” He jokes, causing the sea of reporters around him to laugh as well.

Your lips tremble slightly as you turn off the tv. Rejected. Mr. Han just rejected your engagement to the whole wide world.

“MC.” Jumin’s voice calls out from the speaker, and you jump slightly, having forgotten that he was on the line. From the sound of his voice, you can tell that he too, watched the broadcast.

“I’m alright.” You state, lips trembling a little more, the diamond ring on your finger shining brightly at you.

“I’m alright.” You whisper again, covering your shaking lips as tears fall from your eyes. You refuse to let Jumin know that you’re crying.

Jumin’s soft curse under his breath lets you know that you’re failing at masking your voice.

“I’ll call him right now. I’ll make him announce our engagement. I’ll-”

“It’s okay Jumin.” You cut him off.

“Let him be, it’s alright. I’m alright.” You say gently.

The other side of the line grows quiet, and then finally, “I wish I were there to hold you.”

You let out a small laugh as a sniffle escapes you, “That would only spell trouble for Jaehee.”

“Doesn’t matter.” The smile in his voice makes your heart loosen slightly.

“Come home quickly, I miss you.” You say no longer caring just how needy you sound.

“I’ll try my love. After all, we do have very important guests coming later tonight.”

You smile at that, “You adore my younger sister way too much.”

Jumin lets out a deep chuckle, “And our niece is even cuter.”


You let out a content sigh as you examined the table spread you had set up. An elegant white table cloth clothed the smooth ebony table, held in place by a vase full of peonies (Easter egg! Go read peonies if you haven’t ^^) that you had placed as a centerpiece. White plates with gold spirals stood guard along the edge of the table, the gold matching the faint yellow of the napkins.

You smiled as your eyes drifted to the corner of the table. A child’s high chair stood right in between two dining ones, and you let out a laugh as you saw how out of place it was.

Ding

The sound of the doorbell draws your attention away from the table.

“Coming~” You say as you make your way towards the front door.

You swing the door open with a large smile on your face.

Your younger sister stands in the doorway, a similar smile on her face.

“Hey!” She greets cheerfully, and you quickly pull her into a hug before making way for her to enter the penthouse.

“Wow…’ She breaths as she enters. She sets the car seat in her hands gently on the floor, looking around the penthouse in wonder. “You know, I’ll never wrap my head around the fact that you live here.”

You laugh in answer, you attention solely on the angel strapped inside the car seat. You snap the handle back, and smile down at the little girl buckled inside.

“Hello Akari” You whisper quietly as you lift your niece out of the seat.

She giggles in your arms, blubbering when you rub your nose gently across hers.

“How old is she now?” You ask your sister, turning to face her as you place Akari on your hips.

“She’s about a year now.” Your sister answers, eyes bright as she watches the two of you.

The two of you play with Akari for a while, watching her explore the penthouse and babbling away.

The sound of the front door opening draws your attention away. Jumin’s home!

You snatch Akari up from the floor, ignoring your sister who laughs at you, as you make your way to welcome Jumin.

“Akari, look who’s ho-” You stop short as you look up from the baby in your arms.

Rigid eyes greet you. Slightly shorter. Slightly more grey hair. Mr. Han.

The smile falls off your face instantly.

“M-Mr. Han.” You stutter out, your mouth suddenly dry. Why was he here?

Mr. Han looks around the penthouse slowly, eyes stopping briefly to look at your sister, at Akari, and then finally, back on you.

“I see that Jumin isn’t home yet.” He states.

You nod quietly, giving a little jump as you reposition Akari.

“Ms. MC, my son tells me that you’re quite intelligent.” Mr. Han says.

You backtrack. What?

“He flatters me Mr. Han.” You reply curtly.

You finally move your eyes to his own, and you instantly regret your choice.

An ugly sneer replaces his emotionless face. “Yes, it would seem that my son does flatter you. A little too much. You would think that someone with intelligence would take the hint after watching today’s interview.”

His words pierce your heart. But Mr. Han isn’t finished.

“And would you look at this!” He exclaims, gesturing to your sister and Akari.

“I’ve read up on your family Ms. MC. Your sister got involved with a bad man. Not only did he swindle her of everything, he even left her with a child! I’m not sure how you tricked Jumin, but I can see right through you.”

You rush to explain, “No Mr. Han it isn’t like that, I promise you! Most of the debt is already paid, Jumin doesn’t even know anything about i-”

“I will never accept you as my daughter-in-law.”

Mr. Han’s words cut you off harshly. He glares at you from where he stands, until his eyes slowly fall onto Akari, as if remembering that an infant were present this whole time.

“I won’t ever accept you. You, or your future children.”

His words come out like venom. They poison the air and taint the feelings in your heart.

As if on queue, Akari begins to cry, loud wails echoing off the empty walls. Off of Mr.Han. Your heart wrenches in your chest. It’s almost as if Akari cries for you.

Instantly your sister rushes forward from off the couch to take her daughter and you let her, stuck frozen in place from Mr. Han’s words.  After a few moments Akari’s cries turn to sniffles, and Mr. Han clears his throat as he prepares to leave.

“Please don’t let this drag on Ms. MC.” He says, before shutting the door firmly behind him. Shutting the door, on you.  


Annnnnnnnnd that’s that! I swear it’ll get more interesting soon!!!! Like I said before, I’m simply setting the stage at the moment. 

As always, thank you all for your endless support, and look forward to chapter 2 ^^

Bill Skarsgard x Reader (Late Nights)

Request: The classical boss/assistant romance. She works for him for a few years, she loves him since the start, he doesn’t (yet). He’s older than her, a little bossy.

WARNINGS: none! just fluff :)

Word Count: 1,049

Tag List: @jughead-wuz-here

sorry ahead of time for any spelling/grammar mistakes

Your morning was typical: first one in the office, coffee run, note taking during a meeting, bagel run, more note taking and meetings. Your job as an assistant was grueling and not very rewarding, but you were lucky to have it. As a fresh college graduate with no work experience, you constantly reminded yourself that you’re lucky that you weren’t flipping burgers. Your boss, Bill, had taken a chance on you, and you were immeasurably grateful to him.

He was great boss, overall. He had a bit of a temper and could become very angry if something wasn’t how he liked it. But other than that, he was kind. He always made sure that you weren’t overwhelmed and even sometimes bought you lunch. His small acts of kindness and caring is what made you fall in love with him slowly over the years. 

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