nosebleeds

i was at the dinner table the first time
someone told me, “God
does not exist.” I haven’t had a dream
since then.

sometimes, i imagine dying like it’s
a good magic trick—sometimes, i imagine
dying and it feels like
driving home

often, i want to pry open the mouth of a lion
cut out her tongue, and wait for her
to fight back with just teeth

what i mean to say, is i’m nothing to
scream about. nothing to shine a light
on or give a pair of hands to.

what i mean to say, is i’m just
another way out of the ocean.

what i mean to say, is
i drove home from my own baptism
fully believing i had just narrowly
escaped drowning.

—  “girl is asked about herself for the first time” by spencer wollan
4

[4/5] Biases: Butler Zain [CG Credit: sai2310]

First of all, I would like to say that he’s very attractive. Just look at those beautiful green eyes. I can stare at all his CG’s all day long. The reason why I love Zain is because of his uniqueness, and that he’s secretive but when he actually reveals his true intentions he does have some difficulty to control it. I also believe he’s secretly a closet pervert. He may be a butler but he’s definitely my prince.

HOW TO STOP A NOSEBLEED THE RIGHT WAY

ATTENTION EVERYONE: DO NOT TILT YOUR HEAD BACKWARD I SWEAR TO GOD IF I SEE ANOTHER PERSON DOING THIS IM GONNA FLIP A MAJOR SHIT

TILT YOUR HEAD FOREWARD

OVER A SINK OR A TOILET

AND PINCH IT SHUT LIKE YOURE GOING UNDERWATER

YOURE GONNA HAVE TO BREATH THROUGH YOUR MOUTH

ONLY TAKE YOUR FINGERS OFF TO CHECK IF ITS STILL BLEEDING WITH A BIT OF TISSUE

WHEN IT STOPS BLEEDING IT MIGHT HAVE A CLOT THAT KEEPS YOU FROM BREATHING THROUGH THAT NOSTRIL

BLOW THIS OUT AND KEEP HOLDING UNTIL IT STOPS AGAIN

IT WILL STOP WITHOUT A GINORMOUS CLOT

THANK YOU THIS HAS BEEN A PSA FROM SOMEONE WHO HAS NOSEBLEEDS LIKE EVERY FUCKING WEEK

i met God in a Sunday airport.
my hair braided into snakes.
i ask him to look at me, i say

hello?
remember me?

remember how
i was six years old? a small
and rusted machine?
how i shaped myself into a wooden pew?
took my limbs and turned them
into weaponry? how i shrunk
my target of a body
into suckable candy?
how i retraced my steps through a murder?
how i cracked
under the pressure for you?


how long i waited for this day to come?
to speak to you – to be so
free of sin?
how i rotted from the
inside out?

remember how easy it was to stain
myself into a bulimic lover?
the kind that
eats until they drown, down, Hell –
how i binged
on the rape stained nighttime.
binged on the drunk laughter.


how i always
remembered to purge in the morning?
made sure
i was damp and soapy for you.
how i hung
a cross around my neck
like a noose and
purged myself of sin for you.

remember
how my hands, like glass,
shattered when i prayed? how they
broke into tiny splintered pictures
of my mother with two black eyes?
how i chewed them all like salt?
how i asked you, every time, “God,
why do you live up there
when all the suffering happens
at my feet?”

all of my rose blossoms
have shut themselves
into rocks in the name of your son.

so i say,

God? hello?
remember me?


i can see you. you are
bleeding in granite and stone.
carved out of the marble like
Michaelangelo.
Archangel Michael.

i say, “God,
i am a church for you.”
i say, “God,
i am a flood for you.”
i say, “God,
i am tangerine skin peeled
and hardened in the landfill for you.”
i say, “God,
i am plum pit stuck
in the hem hymn of my intestine
for you: willing
to take off all of my own skin.”

he asks me who i am. tells me
he does not recognize me at all.

—  medusa by spencer wollan

Okay, but don’t go crack out the maple bacon that’s sitting in your fridge–we’re talking cured pork, so prosciutto or spanish bacon. And maybe don’t eat it when you’re finished with it?

Trying to find help for an affliction called Glanzmann thrombasthenia, which causes life-threatening nosebleeds, medical scientists discovered that cured pork packed in the naval cavity stopped the bleeding better than other therapies.

More/source: http://1.usa.gov/Y3grhJ

Vampire Knight
  • Matsuri Hino:Alright we're ending Vampire Knight guys
  • Fans:NOOOO WHYYYY DON'T DO IT PLEASE
  • Matsuri Hino:Yuki gets both Kaname and Zero lololol
  • Fans:Alright We're happy with that ending, Kaname finally gets to be human how sweet
  • Matsuri Hino:........
  • Matsuri Hino:Never fucking mind I want to write more get ready bitches
  • Fans:*nosebleeds everywhere* can't....handle.....must....read.....new manga.......hurry....