norwegian epic,


Day 25 - Honeymoon?

I’m not one of those girls that wants to go to a tropical paradise. Frankly, I’m not a huge fan of the heat. My hair turns into an afro in humidity. I don’t like the feeling of sand sticking to me. Salt water makes me feel dirty. I sunburn REALLY easily. Sure, it’d be beautiful, but it just doesn’t have any appeal to me whatsoever.

Instead, I want to go on a cruise.

Why a cruise versus a vacation somewhere? I feel like with a cruise, we’ll be able to visit a variety of different places. That way, instead of going to one country or destination, we’ll get to see lots of totally different places. Plus, the ship itself will have different things going on. Between the shows, restaurants, casinos, clubs, pools, spas, etc., the ship is basically a vacation in and of itself. Finally, I’d love to opt for a nice balcony. Yeah, it’d be an added expense, but can you imagine ordering room service in the early A.M. and enjoy it on your own private balcony as the sun rises over the ocean in the morning? Christ, it’d be unbelievable.

I’d really like to go on a cruise on the Norwegian Epic. This ship just seems so beautiful in every way. I’d also prefer a European cruise as opposed to a tropical one. As I mentioned, the tropical areas just don’t do it for me, and I would just LOVE to see Europe.


One of the perks of belonging to a pack, is the combine abilities of all it members. One of the members of the rainbow troupe is a very skilled organizer; he has manage to get some of the ships restaurants to only open for us, convince the cruise director to have a private party only for the gays and even talk one of the performers of the cirque show to do a private strip show. 

We found ourselves waiting for a large table at the Manhattan Room here at the Norwegian Epic for about 20 minutes; while sipping the complimentary champagne sent by the cruise director, some of them started talking about the burlesque show they have organized. I wasn’t paying attention, and when a voice told me “Link said he will do it”, without thinking about it I replied, “Sure, I’ll do it”. In my mind I though they were talking about a bowling or Ping-Pong competition. I turns out I agreed to be the opening number for the burlesque show. We all laugh about it, but then they talked me into it. I do miss being a go-go boy, and a burlesque show is something I have never done before. There will be tipping, no compete nudity required (or allowed).

The burlesque show will be in two days from the date I agreed to do it. I hit the gym every time I could. I don’t have a bad body and two days won’t do much difference, but all the iron pumping gave me confidence, I would definitely needed.

They day of the showed arrived and I check the room where it would happen. The show would take place in one of the conference room, all the chairs were arranged on a circle and I would dance in the middle. 

The sound system was bad. I had a playlist ready, but the sound set up could not accommodate a iProduct, so Tim end up holding a microphone to the tinny speaker of my iPhone. 

The music started and I walked into the room. It was packed. There was people on the chairs and people standing behind them, and people agains the wall. Mostly gay men, but there was also a few women… 

I stood in the center of the circle, wearing jeans, a button down shirt, a tie, socks and sneakers. Then the nerves hit up. Everybody was looking at me, expecting me to do something, but I was petrified. Then I told to myself – “You are here. No graceful way out unless you dance. Start moving and things will be easier “ 

I slowly started dancing, and even for second, closed my eyes. 

I had opened all the buttons of my shirt when somebody placed a dollar in my jeans. I had completely forgotten about the tipping part! 

The music pick up the pace and I loosen my tie to be able to open my shirt, I was finally getting into the grove of the moment, when the music suddenly stopped.. 

-“Ok you all bitches! You need to start tipping this boy if you want him to drop some clothes!”

It turns out that one of the gays was acting the part of MC. It took me off guard, and it was hard to get back in to the moment every time the music would stop and he would start talking. 

I drop my shirt, keeping the tie. Then I drop the jeans. I was wearing black boxer briefs. Then I dropped the tie and soon after the boxers briefs. I had a yellow swimsuit under. Soon the swimsuit also was on the floor. I had a tiny, tiny g-string under the swimsuit. The only thinks keeping me for being completely naked in front of 60+ people was a small triangle of tan fabric. I dance around the room almost naked, to everybody’s screams, whistles and howls. I started playing with some of the girls and my little G-string was full of dollar bills. After a while I stood in the middle of the room and took a bow.  Applause broke in the middle of the room and while Tim picked up my clothes and money I walked out of the room. 

I made $50 in 15 minutes. Not bad for a first timer. 

The second act was very different, The main number for the night, Jeronimo, the acrobat dude, was clearly a pro. And that was ok with me, there was a clear contrast between our numbers, I was a slender, toned but not muscular, innocent, young looking dancer, while he was all muscles, older looking, very experienced dancer. He made more money than me because he took a large cut of the admission price ($5 per person), while I just did it for the tips and the excitement.

Let the free drinks start pouring!


Short video exploration of a single, epic Norwegian Fjord, filmed by drone