You exist. You are human. You are loved. Never forget that. Any troll/hate is to only make you feel bad about yourself. But even if that darkness tries bringing you down, you have to know that they don’t know you or how you feel. Show them that you’re confident about your identity and keep loving yourself and living your beautiful life to the fullest. You’re not alone. I’m here for you, and so are many others. And I know I say this a million times a day, but it’s true.
I’m working my way into looking masculine/androgynous. Doing so by cutting my hair, binding (I think), building muscles, dieting, finding androgynous/masculine clothing, etc. Hopefully it’s worth it in the end…
If femininity IS part of your gender identity, by all means, please, identify your gender as feminine! If you feel it’s a positive descriptor of any aspect of yourself, use it, feminine is a wonderful thing to be!
But for all of you who say “I’m feminine” when what you really mean is “I don’t pass” or “I’m closeted”, I DONT want to make you feel bad because I know what you’re experiencing is painful, but I want you to consider that you’re perpetuating some harmful stereotypes that limit both yourself and the trans people around you.
You’re perpetuating an idea that your gender is in any way determined by how the people around you are “reading” you. That’s a violent idea to force onto closeted or non-passing trans people.
A trans boy who doesn’t pass isn’t automatically a “feminine” trans boy. He’s just a trans boy getting read wrong. He’s just a trans boy getting misgendered.
A trans girl who doesn’t pass isn’t automatically a “masculine” trans girl. She’s just a trans girl who isn’t being seen the way she should be.
Therefore, NB people have got to stop perpetuating ideas that presentation or passing or failing to pass has any kind of automatic bearing on how legitimate our gender is or what words we have to use to describe it.
I’m non-binary, I’m non-transitioning, I’m read as female, and sometimes I dress flamboyantly in dresses and makeup. I am NOT feminine. My gender is NOT related to womanhood. This is just how I fucking look, and I don’t have to label myself any way I don’t want to, and I don’t have to let other people label me that way either.
Not all nonbinary people like being called cute and sweet and soft.
So shout out to those of us that are rough and hard and cracked. Those of us that are tough and like to pick fights. Those of us who know what a black eye feels like and how bruised knuckles hurt. Those of us that sweet is the last term anyone would use for us and we like it that way.
Nonbinary is not always soft and sweet. It’s rough and ragged and just as wonderful that way too.