non threatening animals

Tips for Those Who Find Self-Affirmation Super Difficult:
Use other people to see yourself. Think about your best friends, favorite characters, etc who have flaws and think about how much you love them anyway. Think about how a friend or someone reading a book about you would describe you
Take it slow. I love those posts telling everyone to think of themselves as strong beautiful precious land sharks or whatever, but some people aren’t ready to believe that yet and saying the words just feels like something you’re supposed to say and not something you mean. You can work up to big affirmations by starting with little ones; “I’m pretty good at math and I have nice eyes” might be easier than starting off with “I’m beautiful and a genius”
Start off deconstructing negative thoughts. It can be hard sometimes to convince yourself that you’re great when your head won’t stop screaming “but I’m useless and gross!!” or whatever. Try to rephrasing those thoughts so you can continue to self affirm- remind yourself that most people aren’t completely awful and that there are many things that you do well
Make lists. List your positive traits, and then think about one specifically and convince yourself of them one at a time. List your goals and then the ways that your positive traits can help you achieve them. List all the times in your life where you’ve felt proud or good about yourself and use them like little Patronus memories to ward off bad thoughts.
Visualize your affirmations. It can be infinitely more effective to think about all the times you’ve been generous in your life than to merely say “I am generous.”
Spend time around people who talk to you the way you should be talking to yourself. It sounds kind of dumb, but at times even people who insult you in a completely friendly way as a joke (“are you coming to the party bitch?” etc) can contribute to you being able to say those things to yourself, even if it’s harmless. Conversely, being around people who talk to you positively can really, really help it sink in.
Figure out what tone best relays self affirming information to you. For some people, it’s the cute and non-threatening pictures of animals telling you to be kind to yourself. For some, it’s imagining the affirmations to be coming from a person or character you think of as wise. For some, it’s trying to make it sound as logical an argument as possible so that there’s no room for self-doubt. Sometimes you need them all at different times.
If using words at all to self affirm is difficult or problematic for you, try other ways of reinforcing the information. Do things that make you feel good about yourself and highlight positive qualities you have, like volunteering or creating or whatever it might be. Reward yourself when you do something good or reflect on something that makes you good. You can even self affirm through movies and music.
Sometimes broad definitions help. Try to remember that your definition of being a good person has to be flexible; it doesn’t hing solely on being a good parent or friend or boss or writer. For most people, being able to define themselves as a good person is the basis for their positive sense of identity, so try to remember that there are MANY different ways to be a good person that are not contingent upon never screwing up

Today, for the first time in my life, I got to pet a horse instead of just seeing one in passing. I didn’t know their hair felt so coarse, but it was in a nice way and it wasn’t a sensory issue like I was afraid it might be.

Today, for the first time in my life, I got kissed by a horse. My entire forearm got wet with horse spit. It was gross, and it was hilarious at the same time.

Another funny thing is his ears went straight up when I took my sunglasses off. It was like he was saying “wait, you have eyes?!” LOL

He kept nudging his nose into my palm and mouthing my hands and I had to keep apologizing for not having a treat for him. 

He’s a really nice horse, albeit a bit nosy! (Silly boy.) He is a big brown horse; I’m not sure what kind. He’s gorgeous and really friendly. I looked him in the eye and he looked back with such an inquisitiveness.

I didn’t know horses had really long eyelashes under their eyes. That was cool to see!

…and I really want to ride a horse for real at least once in my life. I’m not afraid of horses even though they’re so huge. They’re such strong, gorgeous animals. My mom grew up around horses, so she knows all about how to take care of them and ride them and all that horse stuff.

Anyway, this horse really seemed to like me. Most animals take a liking to me. Well, except cats who never met me– most of them are shy, though I’ve had a few come right up to me with their tails up. Even the raccoons in the back yard aren’t afraid to walk past the back door if I’m standing right inside it, but they won’t pass if my mom is there. 

I don’t know why animals see me as “safe” to approach or pass. I guess I just give off a non-threatening vibe. (I love animals anyway, so that could be it.)


Anyway, a horse kissed me! LOL!!


(My aunt just completed training to be a mounted police officer, so she’s an officer on a horse. Mom and I went to meet her new horse. :D)