Hi, first of all I love what you're doing with this blog, it's very helpful! The protagonist of the story I'm writing is non-binary but I don't know anyone who identifies that way and was wondering if you had any advice on writing them?
Since we received this question, @scriptlgbt was born, so I’m hoping they’ll see this and reblog with an A+ answer.
However, I do think it’s important to note that while finding someone who identifies as non-binary (or any individual with specific experience in anything) is important, their experience doesn’t necessarily speak to the whole. Because we’re individuals, and one person who identifies as non-binary may have a completely different experience as someone else who is also non-binary. So to wonder if we have advice on writing “them,” makes it seem like we can draft up one true, right way to write about these characters. And I don’t think there is one right way, or even two or three.
Three non-binary characters may share that in common, but if they grew up in homes with vastly different support systems, or if they were open about it or forced to hide it, or if they faced bullying for even more than just their gender identity (race, sexuality, disability, ect.) then that compounds their ability to embrace their identity as a whole, and depending on the character’s coping mechanisms, they may evolve in various ways.
However, just because you write a non-binary character does not mean you have to write about non-binary social issues. You can still tell a story that’s independent of the character’s gender identity. I feel like that’s one way we start to show that it’s normal, but I know there are various opinions on this, because ignoring the social issues might minimize how marginalized they are as a group.
I’d love for anyone to chime in, reblog, add comments, especially if you identify as non-binary, so this anon can be setup for success.