no-laughing-matter

anonymous asked:

hey noah fence but you wouldn't go up to a person irl and tell them it'd be funny if their prosthetic was replaced by a pool noodle,,, i understand it's fiction and y'all are just having a laugh but wouldn't you rather make fun of his bara tiddies or his instagram fringe,,, instead of his disability?

By no offense you mean full offense. Look buddy, I’m not making fun of his disability. I’m not erasing his disability at all even. Wouldn’t making fun if his “bara tiddies” also be making fun of the abuse he was under fighting to the death in a colosseum which resulted in his muscle mass? Wouldn’t making fun of his “Instagram fringe” be making fun of the intense strain his body was put under both in the ring and out?

Honestly, none of its a laughing matter when put into a serious tone. However, does it always have to be serious? What about the veterans who have lost their limbs that make jokes about it? Or people with disabilities who laugh it off because it makes them feel better?

Just because it is a gruesome reality does not mean it has to always be treated as such. Even shiro in canon makes jokes about almost dying. There is humor in surviving, and there isn’t anything wrong with that as long as it’s in a time and a place.

So just loosen up ok? I, in no way shape or form would make fun of someone with disabilities. Especially since a good portion of the people that I’m good close friends and family with are such people.

Basically, This is Basically What Every Dr. Phil Episode is Basically Like Basically
  • Dr. Phil: Hello, I am Doctor Philip, and today we'll be tackling an issue that is very widespread, but rarely spoken about. Gaming addiction. Now, I know many of you know at least one person in your life who plays video games, whether that be a child or, in some cases, a spouse.
  • Audience: *laughs*
  • Dr. Phil: But, when unregulated, gaming can lead to serious addiction. Today I have with me a mother who's home life has been torn apart as her very own son descended into gaming addiction.
  • Mother: *sniffing and wiping tears away* Hello, doctor. Will you cure my son?
  • Dr. Phil: Well, dear, that's... uhh. Let's just bring the boy out already.
  • *dramatic music plays*
  • Gamer: My name is Gregg, I'm 19 years old, I'm a gaming addict, and I don't give a f*ck.
  • Audience: *gasps*
  • Gamer: Yeah, I game for 19 to 20 hours a day and the other four hours I use for looking up sick gaming strats or beating it to anime porn. I once sucked off a dude because he offered me minecraft diamonds. I don't give a sh*t, I would've sucked him off even if he didn't have the diamonds.
  • Audience: *gasps louder*
  • Gamer: Do I hate women? Yes, I hate women. I've emailed Anita Sarkeesian my address. She knows where I am if she wants to fight me. Feminists, square the fuck up. People always ask why I don't do anything other than gaming. I ask them why don't they mind their own f*cking business. I don't think I have a problem. Dr. Phil can honestly eat my whole an*s.
  • Gamer: *walks out onto the stage*
  • Audience: *boos*
  • Gamer: F*ck all y'all! I don't give a f*ck! *flips off the audience*
  • Dr. Phil: Please take a seat, son.
  • Gamer: *sits very disrespectfully*
  • Mother: *starts bawling*
  • Dr. Phil: Son, do you think that was acceptable behavior?
  • Gamer: The only behavior I care about is the behavioral patterns for enemies in the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. series. I love video games: Master chief, Mario, uhm, Blinx the Cat... Blasto. Love those guys!
  • Audience: *boos*
  • Gamer: I don't care! You think I care! F*ck all y'all!
  • Dr. Phil: All these people are booing you, doesn't that make you feel bad?
  • Gamer: Are you deaf? Have I not articulated the fact that I absolutely 100% do not care about anything except for video games? I. DON'T. GIVE. A. F*CK.
  • Mother: He's always like this, there's no changing him. It didn't used to be this way... just *starts bawling harder*
  • Dr. Phil: I think there is a way to change him, and we'll find out more about that after these messages.
  • *Dr. Phil theme plays*
  • *The lights dim and every goes empty eyed and slack-jawed*
  • Gamer: Heh, this is weird. *nudges mom and whispers to her* Hey, we're getting paid for this, right. Hey, mom? ...Mom?
  • Mother: *completely unresponsive*
  • Dr. Phil: *completely unresponsive*
  • Audience: *completely unresponsive*
  • Gamer: Heh... this is REALLY weird. *looks around nervously*
  • Audience member: Hey!
  • Gamer: Huh?
  • Audience Member: I'm in the audience! Over here! My arms are strapped to the chair! You have to help me!
  • Gamer: *runs to the audience member*
  • Audience Member: Thank god, I thought I was the only one here left with any brains.
  • Gamer: *hastily undoing the straps* What the fuck is going on?
  • Audience Member: I don't know, but this definitely isn't Dr. Phil's show.
  • Gamer: Then what is it?
  • Audience Member: No clue, but we have to get out of here before the commercial breaks ends.
  • Gamer: *successfully undoes the straps*
  • Audience Member: C'mon! Let's go. *grabs the gamer by the arm*
  • Gamer: *resists* Wait a fucking minute. Why am I supposed to trust you?
  • Audience Member: Because I'm normal and everyone else is braindead if you haven't noticed.
  • Gamer: Yeah, but I'm not going anywhere until I know what's going on. Being on Dr. Phil is a huge opportunity for me to, y'know, advertise my brand. I'm a gamer if you haven't noticed.
  • Audience Member: Are you insane? Have you had a look around you? Does this anything happening right now seem normal to you? Who cares about your "brand". Do you even remember how you got here?
  • Gamer: Well... now that you mention, I can't really remember exactly.
  • Audience Member: Yeah, now let's get the fuck out of here.
  • *the gamer and audience member run through the back exit into the hallways*
  • *the Dr. Phil theme blares as the show returns from commercial break*
  • Gamer: My ears!
  • Audience Member: Move it! *jerks gamer's arm*
  • Gamer: Okay, calm down.
  • *the entire audience screams in unison*
  • Gamer: What the fuck is that!?
  • Audience Member: It's the reason we're running! Quick, in here!
  • *the duo duck into a cramped broom closest*
  • Gamer: Listen, you have to tell me what the fuck is going on right now!
  • Audience Member: Shh.
  • Gamer: Don't shush me!
  • Audience Member: *covers the gamer's mouth*
  • *agonized screaming and violently rumbling passes by the broom closest*
  • Gamer: Holy shit!
  • Audience Member: Stop yelling.
  • Gamer: How can I not yell when it sounds the gates of hell just passed by us!
  • Audience Member: You want it to turn back around and find us?
  • Gamer: Alright. I'll calm down... I'll. *start sobbing*
  • Audience Member: Please, please stop crying. You're too loud.
  • Gamer: I can't! I'm under a lot of stress!
  • Audience Member: You'll be dead if you don't shut the fuck.
  • Gamer: I never wanted any of this, I just wanted to go on Dr. Phil so people would recognize me on YouTube and I could become a popular Let's Player!
  • Audience Member: If you don't shut up right now, I'll-
  • *a snake bites the audience member's neck*
  • Audience Member: *eyes roll up*
  • Gamer: *screams like a baby*
  • *snakes slither under the closet door*
  • Gamer: *stumbles out of the closet and falls into hallway covered with snakes* Fuck me! Fuck me!
  • Gamer: *attempts to run away but falls beneath the snakes and into and empty void*
  • *agonized screaming echoes from all around*
  • Gamer: Am I in hell? I have to be in hell. You don't fall through a pool of snakes and wind up anywhere else but hell.
  • Dr. Phil: THERE IS NO HELL.
  • Gamer: Doc, is that you? If this isn't hell then where am I?
  • Dr. Phil: YOU'RE IN MY REALM SON. *Dr. Phil's face appears glowing in the distance, his eyes are empty sockets and his mouth hangs open*
  • Gamer: What the fuck are you?
  • Dr. Phil: I'M DOCTOR PHILIP.
  • Gamer: You're not Dr. Phil!
  • Dr. Phil: I NEVER SAID I WAS, SON. *a wall of gray human bodies lights up surrounding Dr. Phil's massive head, dr. phil's giant snake body slithers towards the gamer and opens its third eye* I'M DOCTOR PHILIP.
  • *the wall of bodies screams in unison as Dr. Phil devours the gamer*
  • *Dr. Phil theme plays loudly*
  • Dr. Phil: THE NEXT EPISODE IS STARTING. I'M LATE. *slithers into the wall of bodies and his snake body slowly transforms into a normal Dr. Phil's body*
  • Dr. Phil: *crawls onto the stage*
  • Dr. Phil: *dusts himself off* Woo, I went on quite an adventure.
  • Audience: *laughs*
  • Dr. Phil: I'm glad we can all find some time in our lives to laugh, but today's episode is covering something that is most certainly not a laughing matter. It's one of the most serious addictions striking America today and it's rarely talked about. I'm talking about people who love to pee on their mattresses and then pay people exorbitant amounts of money to suck their disgusting mattresses clean.
  • Audience: ... *someone clears their throat*
  • Dr. Phil: What's the matter?
  • Cameraguy: Spsss, Doc. That's not what the episode is about. It's about people with terrible gambling issues.
  • Dr. Phil: Oh, ah, fuck! Cut to commercial!
It's not just the food that's revolting.

(long story)

Back in my college days, I lived on campus and ate the 20-meals-a-week meal plan at the cafeteria. It was… terrible. Seriously. I know people complain about their college cafeteria all the time, but they still gain their “freshman 15”. I lost mine. The food was disgusting. Sunday spaghetti was made from tomato sauce and Saturday’s cheap hamburgers. One week they didn’t bother ripping up the hamburgers: watery, sauce-tinted, overcooked noodles garnished with dry, leathery, two-day-old hamburger patties. It was still better than the other options. At first, they had a “make your own pizza” line, but removed it because everyone was using it, and “bread isn’t cheap.” I remember seeing a real salad in their “healthy eats” line and getting excited, because it’s hard to screw up salads, only to realize that it was literally floating in oil. The salad on the actual salad bar was not an option; it was changed out every morning, whether it needed it or not. Oh, sorry, I meant the ice in the salad bar. Not the salad, no. A student wrote his initials in the tuna and it remained for a solid week. Sometimes the salad would grow its own salad.

They had a big board set up for student complaints, and they would write responses back. Oddly enough, the board rarely had bad things to say; the manager, may he be haunted by a thousand bedbugs, confessed that he didn’t have time to answer every complaint, but he did read every one, and took the complaints into consideration. And, as far as we could tell, threw away all the ones he didn’t like.

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aquiver | 01 (m)

aquiver (adj.) [uh-kwiv-er] in a state of trepidation or vibrant agitation; trembling; quivering

pairing: min yoongi x reader
genre/warnings: mature themes, talk of masturbation, smut, language
words: 10,110
summary: Yoongi can’t remember the last time he was able to successfully bring himself to the point of orgasm, then Namjoon gives him a business card advertising ‘Healing Hands’, and that’s where he meets you; pretty and innocent looking, who gets paid to provide hand jobs for a living…
note. inspired by the novella ‘The Grownup’ by Gillian Flynn, literally just the character’s past occupation haha

» playlist | 01 | 02 | 03 |

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Bakugou being tied up and muzzled on the podium is no laughing matter

I already wrote about that part in my post on his and Amajiki’s mental health issues some weeks ago. I knew it was gonna happen when the episode would come out, but really, don’t treat this scene as a funny one. It’s not something to make fun of. Bakugou is emotionally unstable, and has mental health issues that need to be taken care of. But it doesn’t make him an animal or a dangerous evil being that should be restrained and publicly humiliated like that. He’s a 15 years old boy dealing with complexes and anxiety, therefore making his behavior violent. What he needs, especially as a teen, is mental care, not being mocked and humiliated as a punishment. This moment will have consequences later, and I thank Hori for that. 

It’s not a funny moment. He’s dehumanized, treated as less than human in front of the whole society, and nobody say a thing. Even All Might just stay here and thinks Bakugou’s face is quite something, forcing the medal on him. And that’s a problem, both in the manga and in our reality. The trope of people being too emotional and angry to be rational, talked to and treated with care unfortunately participates in domestic abuse, and a lot of systemic oppression, mostly against mentally ill people and women (especially black women). Look at how Best Jeanist treats him later. 

Is that how you treat a kid you’re responsible of? Bakugou respects Best Jeanist; he doesn’t flare up and shout at him even if the man is being very rude and harsh against him. But because he saw how Bakugou behaved and was treated at UA sports festival, Best Jeanist made assumptions on him and didn’t even wait to meet and talk to him. He nominated him just because he wanted to ‘reform’ him. As adults, people of UA and Best Jeanist failed to take care of Bakugou.  Aizawa recognized it, and apologized later.

And this is no laughing matter. It will have consequences later, as Hori makes sure to show it, both metaphorically and literally with this notion of ‘being shackled by people and society’.

So, please consider it’s wrong that this situation is perceived as funny and unavoidable when he’s only a 15 years old kid. Bakugou angrily brushing his teeth after oversleeping is funny (kinda, he’s still frustrated after all). Bakugou being dehumanized and demonized by everyone, especially responsible adults who should handle the situation with care, is not.

Manners (Jimin smut)

Originally posted by kookiyoon

Description: Jimin is your best friend’s roommate, and to say you get on each other’s nerves would be an understatement. Jimin decides it is his mission to teach you some ‘manners’.

This fic includes: Explicit smut, ‘good girl’ term, dominance games, hate love type dynamic, light spanking, ‘teaching of manners’ lmfaoo

Genre: Smut

Pairing: Jimin x You (ft Yoongi and Taehyung)

Word count: 4.5k

You lazily played a game on Yoongi’s phone, your eyes peering up every now and then to look at the TV screen, displaying a movie utterly boring to you. You let out an unintentional sigh; you were considering getting up to scour for food.

“Why are you here if you’re so bored?” Jimin asked from the other side of Yoongi, whose lap your head lay upon. You sat up to match Jimin’s glare.

“Jimin.” You heard Yoongi scold under his breath. Deciding not to waste your energy, you ignored Jimin and got up to search through their fridge. Yoongi thought you couldn’t hear him once you were in the kitchen, and you barely could, but his low and deep voice rung through the practically silent dorm “I’m so sick of you being such a dick to Y/N. Go say sorry.”

“What?” Jimin laughed. “I’m not a child.”

“Jimin.” Yoongi’s voice was so stern you got goose bumps.

“Whatever.” Jimin mumbled, his light footsteps approaching the kitchen. You quickly stuffed your head in the fridge, acting like you were very busy. When you looked up, closing the fridge door with a muffin in your hand, Jimin is leaning back against the counter with his arms crossed over his chest and a subtle frown on his face. 

“Yes?”

“I’m glad you’re making yourself at home.” Jimin says, his eyes pointing at the treat in your hands. You smile tauntingly, not breaking eye contact as you take an excessively big bite.

“Thanks.” You mumble through your full mouth.

“Gosh, did no one ever teach you manners?” He asks with a serious expression.

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Noctis laughing
Final Fantasy XV
Noctis laughing

Noctis: *laughing* Oh man. That’s hilarious!  an adorable laugh  (ᗒᗨᗕ)

Ignis: This is no laughing matter.  (  3`д3´)

Since Jason’s truck is still getting fixed up in the shop, they use Trini’s 1998 Land Cruiser as their transportation (She constantly reminds her friends that it’s two years older than them) and that they better respect it. Billy takes her seriously. The others don’t. Zack’s sure that Trini loves the car almost as much as she loves Kim.

  • First of all, it’s Trini’s car. after years of saving money from birthdays and a good paying summer job before she moved to Angel Grove, she bought it with her own money.
  • It’s missing a headlight and has a huge crack down the middle of the windshield. 
  • Trini threatens the boys every time they get in “Zack if you put a dent in the roof I’ll kill you” and “Jason if you make us crash you’re paying for the damages.” 
  • She doesn’t threaten Billy or Kim
  • Kim gets control of the AUX cord and is the only one allowed in the passenger seat (which pisses off Zack and he tries to take it from her. Trini says she’ll throw him out the window) 
  • They start to call her car Hulk because no matter how much shit they put that car through, it’s still in one piece (besides the missing headlight and crack in the windshield) and that it really does feel like it’s indestructible.
  • One day Kim decides to have Billy hotwire Hulk so she can take him to the shop to “Paint over the ugly grey”
  • Trini catches them and just stands there looking all disappointed at her girlfriend with her arms crossed as Billy goes, “KIM MADE ME DO IT, I SWEAR!!” 
  • Trini forgives Billy
  • She doesn’t forgive Kimberly 
  • Later that same week, it’s Trini’s birthday so Kim wakes Billy up at 6 in the morning to steal Hulk. Kim takes it to the shop and replaces the light and windshield. 
  • They drive back to an angry Trini which quickly grows into a happy Trini because, “Holy shit, both of the lights work again!!!” 
  • The next day Trini notices painted pink lips in the corner of her trunk, which she didn’t notice before. Kim just smiles from the passenger seat as she hears Trini, “Kimberly!” 
  • Hulk is the coolest car in the parking lot of Angel Grove. Everyone constantly asks Trini she’ll give them a ride. She tells them to fuck off. (They grumble when Trini lets Kimberly in)  
  • Billy buys Trini a power ranger sticker family (Even though Trini swore that she’d never put a sticker on Hulk, she does it anyways because it’s Billy and she didn’t know that people were making them into car stickers now but she thinks it’s pretty damn cool) 
  • Trini gives her spare key to Kimberly 
  • Zack tries to steal it
  • Sometimes the gang shows up to school late because, “Kimberly, did you take my key?” “What? No, Trini, I haven’t seen your key, I have my own.” Trini and Kim then start bickering about using Kim’s key and Billy just goes, “It’s in your hand, Trini.” 
  • Jason wants to sell his truck for a land cruiser 
  • He doesn’t because, “Jason if you get a wannabe Hulk I’ll cut your balls off.” 
  • It’s almost like Kimberly lives in that car. Her sweatshirts and various articles of clothing are everywhere
  • One day when it’s just Zack and Trini, Zack just holds up a pink bra. (Trini slams on the brakes in the middle of traffic just to punch him all while her face gets red) Zack doesn’t stop laughing. 
  • No matter how many laws they seem to break with Hulk, they never get caught

A concept: Yuuri affectionately calling Victor “Vitya” while being tickled and pinned to the bed. His cheeks are flushed, his hair is messy, and he can’t stop laughing no matter how hard he tries. Victor kisses his cheek as his fiancé’s hands playfully push on his own. He thinks of how far they’ve come since they’d met so many years ago, how glad he is that they’re comfortable with each other and that his overwhelming, unconditional love is requited.

Wait For It (M)

Anonymous Requested: Jungkook Royal AU
Pairing: Jungkook | Reader
Genre: Fluff/Smut; Royalty AU 
Word Count: 11,013
Author’s Note: I pretty much took a whole day off from life to work on this, since I start school on Monday and wanted to try and get through as much writing as I can before hell starts.

Summary: As royalty, you were forced to be sent off and married to a prince of the neighboring kingdom to strengthen your country. But when you are betrothed earlier than you expected, you seek comfort in a random stranger until you realize that perhaps fate plays a bigger hand in things than you ever thought possible.

.

For the record, you never asked to be a princess. Not that you think you would ever have had an upper hand in a situation like that in the first place, or that you expected things to be different if you could go back in time to watch your family history unfold. It’s just something that’s short, and simple, and a fleeting thought you ponder about on more than one occasion, which is certainly a lot more times than someone who was actually happy with their lives would think.

Now, it’s not that you’re ungrateful with the life you’ve been gifted with, you’re well aware of the luck you’ve received, because at the end of the day, it’s the kind of lifestyle that guarantees food upon the table. It promises a roof over your house during the night, during the rain or snow, (more than) comfortable clothing to keep you warm throughout the bitter winter. The gold and motivation and rule your family has over the kingdom is nothing to shy away from.

It just, it provokes a lot of… pressure in your system, in your heart and in your mind.

Most of these things sprout from your father, who is probably just as ruthless as he is caring and hard-working and passionate about the land he is expected to rule over with grace and respect and an equal amount of force to make sure the people of the kingdom didn’t take advantage of him. He’s always been a loving father, albeit expecting the most out of you between your two other siblings. As caring or thoughtful or empathetic has he could be, there were often moments in your life when your best was never good enough for him.

You’ve been taught since birth to follow the orders and rules set up by your father because, as so graciously pointed out by the servants the dusk and clean and care for you on more than one occasion, your father always did what he believed would be best for you. So every piano or violin or guitar lesson he ever made you take, those foreign language lessons, classes on discipline and how to look, think, behave like a princess—those were always for your own future benefit.

“Keep your back straight, shoulders back, smile pretty.”

Always cut small pieces of your meal. Take small sips of your drinks. Always remember to wipe your mouth with a napkin.”

“Don’t speak unless spoken to.”

It’s not that you hate being a princess. You just hate having things being done for you, you hate how decisions and that free-will of choice and responsibility has been ever-so-graciously lifted off your shoulders as if these were things you would never have to burden yourself with. You hate not having a voice, your words drowned by the ones of your father or mother. Your existence has constantly been overshadowed by those greater than you could ever hope to be. You hate the role you have to play into society, how you had to spend your days dealing with other people’s problems. Shouldering a kingdom is no laughing matter, there are rules and regulations and decisions that constantly need to be made to ensure the safety and well-being of everyone who live within the borders. Your mere existence is to live for other people.

It’s exhausting.

But in spite of your feelings, you know that changing fate is practically impossible. So you roll with your father’s wishes, because you understand that this is duty you owe to your kingdom. Perhaps at the end of the day, it will truly never really matter what you desire. From the moment you were birth, your entire life story has already been written by you, the quill of ink belonging to your father and mother and every other person who thought they could know you better than you could ever know yourself.

You let yourself take everything in. You visit the nearby villages and listen to everyone’s problems, their hopes and wishes and promise to become stronger and stronger to help them. You take the lessons set up by your father. You keep your back straight, your eyes forward, your mouth shut. You accept the fancy parties and the wine, the dancing and the violins echoing through your ear, speaking only when you are spoken to. It’s torture, but you have to remind yourself that is it your duty, your obligation and your responsibility.

You even let your father tell you that there will come a day when you will be sent off to a predetermined prince in a neighboring kingdom, be married off into a family you don’t know and perhaps will never truly belong to—all for the benefit of your kingdom. You let him tell you this, and you accept it. You give yourself a few years to mentally prepare yourself, expecting your father at the very least to grant you this one wish.

A raised eyebrow. “But the prince could be ready to meet you any day now.”

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so uh, i’m having an emotional crisis since voltron ended and i just?? want more??? i haven’t pined for a series like this in so long ahahaha

so now have that blade-of-marmora!galra!keith + altean!lance au that nobody probably wants feat. eventual mutual pining

Inspired by this art of rachelhuey (thank u for letting me running away with your ideas!!!)

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Sex with the Avengers

Request: In your opinion, what is the favorite sexual position of each guy (Steve, Bucky, Pietro, Clint, Bruce, Tony) with a female partner? And for Natasha and Wanda (ONLY if you’re comfortable with)? I’M IN LOVE WIH YOUR BLOG! -Anon

A/N: Oops, I planned to write this quickly -like just tell you the positions, but now here I am, four hours later and all of the descriptions aren’t even containing one exact position. Sorry, I hope you like these anyway haha x AND THANK YOU DOLL ♥

Ps. Gosh, I’m such a trash for Steve.

Originally posted by starksokovia

Pietro

Keyword: His speed. Oh god, that speed. He would take time to have sex with you, but he would use his speed while teasing you –first, he’s kissing you against the wall and before you even realize, you are laying naked underneath him, his mouth devouring your dripping wet core, causing you to scream his name from the sudden contact.

Pietro would love to be on top; pressing you against the mattress, kissing your lips or sucking your neck demandingly. This position gives him everything he wants; chance to see your expressions, eventuality to touch you and the oh so good possibility to use his speed on you, fucking you hard while you tangle your fingers to his hair or dig your nails to his back, leaving marks he loves to see at the morning after your heated night together.

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currents | (m)

Originally posted by osyub

pairing: jung hoseok x reader
genre/warnings: smut, fluff, slight angst (this is low-key cute and sad at the same time, my heart)
words: 5,959
summary: you’ve been in a long-distance friendship with Hoseok for a couple of years, hiding feelings that you think he may also reciprocate. What happens when you finally cross paths with him again…
note. based on a request. Named after this song here. Also, periods of italics indicate the characters are speaking English!

a/n: by the way, who’s shocked I managed to write something under 6k…Has this ever happened before?! Also, this is really different for me because I don’t usually like writing so close to reality, but I loved the idea so much, I had to write it!

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The Paladins Reacting To You Getting Hurt In Battle Would Include..

I DO NOT OWN THE GIF

PROMPT?:  hello! i friggin love your blog. do you think you could do a would include for the voltron paladins, how they would react to you getting hurt in battle/captured?? sorry if it’s a bad explanation, i haven’t really requested for much ahah. thank you so much!

A/N: An option for allura lovers! yay! And hell yeh i added dad Coran. Also this is my first one in this format so be kind? and these all surround the same kind of injury! 

WARNINGS: gender neutral!! pain mention?? cursing

SHIRO: When he hears your body hit the alien dirt, Shiro loses all patience. He orders all the other paladins to start kicking ass and runs to your noodle body. Although he knows it’s probably bad, he would start cradling your neck and wrap his other available arm around your midsection and nervously smile down at you. He would laugh and brush away any dirt or stray hairs. And once you got back to the castle, he would attend to your every need, even the smallest pillow fluff. Lots of “Shiro, I can walk-” “Nope, crutches.” and “Shiro, I’m breathing. You can go to bed.” but he would stay there anyway. He would keep you from fighting for at least a week. And lots of nose kisses once he feels your ‘frail and fragile’ body could handle it.

PIDGE: Once you’re taken out of battle, Pidge’s fighting power like.. triples. She finishes it for you. She will make sure that whatever hurts you, pays for it. Most of the paladins get out of the way once the news gets over the com that you’re hurt. And once she’s pulled away from kicking the enemy and berating it, she runs endless medical tests on you. Space CAT Scans and going into the castle healing pods for at least three hours a day until even the pod rejects you. She will hang out with you and make you soup and bring you water if you even look the least bit dehydrated. She will block off a good portion of the lounge so Lance and Keith have to sit on the last three feet of the couch. No one says anything. They’re afraid. 

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Love & War. {Feysand}

Originally posted by sensuous

Sorry this took so long for me to post, friends. I had a busy (stressful) week and it caused some writer’s block. Thank you all for voting in my poll, though! Here is the prompt that got the most votes. I love hearing from my readers, and finding new prompts in my askbox. It makes me feel amazing as a writer! 

Warning: This oneshot is equally smutty and adorable.


Where are you?

I shot the question through the bond as I watched Elain. She was sitting across from Azriel as he told her yet another story about Truth-teller. After what had happened with the King of Hybern, Elain had wanted to hear all about the sword, where it had gone with Azriel through the years, and the history it had witnessed. Her small frame was turned towards him, shoulders curved inward as her chin rested in the palm of her hand, her elbow gently placed on her crossed knees. With wide eyes, she clung onto his every word.

The study.

My eyes shifted to where Nesta sat next to Amren in the long chairs outside the sparring ring. My sister was watching the Illyrian intensely, her lips pursed, but her gray-blue eyes longing. Mor and Cassian danced around one another, jokingly, in their fighting leathers. Mor had knocked him on his ass three times in the last hour. He had blamed it on his injuries, claimed he was still healing.

Mor had claimed she was going easy on him for the same reason.

Your missing out on Cassian getting beat up by Mor, I heard him laugh through the bond as I continued, it’s pretty amusing. And also a little bit sad.

He deserves it, he replied, amusingly. I miss you.

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Iggy's stolen specs pt. 1
Final Fantasy XV
Iggy's stolen specs pt. 1

CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE VERY FIRST SOUND THAT IGNIS MAKES?

Ignis: *muffled grunt* Noct!! 

Noctis: What’s wrong? You okay?  Σ(・Д・)

Ignis: *heaves* It’s not me! It’s my spectacles!  (3` Д 3´)

Noctis: Your glasses? Well, how come they’re not on your face? (・д・`o)

Ignis: I was making ready to leave camp, when a black chocobo saddled up, snatched my specs from over my nose, and bolted.  (33´)

Noctis: *laughs* Awww man. That’s hilarious! (ᗒᗨᗕ)

Ignis: This is no laughing matter. We must retrieve them at once!  (3`Д 3´)

Noctis: “At once”? Like right now?  (゚ー゚;)