hey ship, i was just dumped by my boyfriend of 1 year. he said i deserved better, and that he didnt want to try to fix things anymore, or fix me anymore. i was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease recently that thickens collagen, and they dont know if it'll spread to my internal organs. im not happy anymore. i miss him every day, and i dont know what to do. ive lost my rock that kept me sane through side effects and bad days. i know its a lot to ask, but do you have any advice?
I’m sorry. People begin to feel like home, and when they leave, sometimes we feel lost. But people are a lot more like hermit crabs than barnacles… we’re not fixed in one place for our entire lives, attached permanently to a single identity and unable to move on or survive a change. We can find our homes anywhere, and when they no longer accommodate everything we are or need to be, we find new ones. Sometimes they’re a little unconventional…
…but we make the best with what we have.
If you feel like you’ve lost your rock, it’s okay - you’re not a barnacle. Use other resources in your life to craft yourself something that feels like a home. Family, friends, interests, hobbies… it’ll feel right eventually.
There are people a lot more equipped than me to advise or support you with chronic illness. But… life has never been stable, really. Not for anybody. Life is full of chance and risk. There are no promises of health and safety, no guarantees that we’ll prosper. There’s always a chance that things could go very, very badly at a moment’s notice. But there’s also a chance that they won’t - we’re not guaranteed to suffer. And those odds are always worth gambling on.