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Bad Hair Day

(Just a rumination on how Maria’s long MCU hair might end up as short as her 616 counterpart, with bonus lady-loving Sif!  Slight warning for fire, and veiled discussion of hair catching fire.  Everyone is fine, because COMICS.)

“It’s not that bad.”

“I don’t care.”

“I mean, all things considered, it’s not nearly as bad as it could’ve been.”

“I repeat. I do not care.”

“I would, if my hair looked that bad.”

Maria gritted her teeth and tried to focus on her report. “Are there classes?” she asked, jamming her thumb against the tablet, signing off on the file. “Remedial lessons? Anything that you could do to improve your bedside manner, because it seems to be getting worse by the day.”

Dr. Anna Garza made a tsking noise under her breath. “I guess I could branch out into psychology or sociology, or one of those wussy sorts of sciences-”

Maria grinned down at the long, boring listing of situational outcomes. “Aw, did the psyche division kick your asses in the softball tournament again?”

“You know they did, you were the lying, cheating, drunken umpire that allowed it to happen,” Anna said, glaring at her over the top of her clipboard. “Anyway. I could. I could try to be a better doctor all around, but that would require me to have spare time and when you keep blowing up chunks of the city and then dancing around the flames-”

“I blew up nothing,” Maria said, stabbing a finger in her direction. “It wasn’t even the Avengers this time, but I guess we could blame Stark.” She liked blaming Stark. It gave her a pleasure that was very nearly sexual. She supposed as kinks went, ‘blaming things on Tony Stark’ was pretty tame, and mostly legal.

Also, she was pretty sure that Fury knew about it, and approved.

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