no really there was a hole

Gone

You lie awake,

Alone in a room full of 

Memories.

Sleep should have come by now,

But slumber evades you 

Like clever prey does a hunter.


The sheets are

Cold

Beneath your touch.

This is the first time that

This bed has held one

Instead of two.


There’s a toxin

Forcing itself into your lungs,

A growing storm outside.

Gasps shallow,

Gale howls,

You are unable to breathe.


For the one you love is

Gone.


The daytime is no better.

Your insides are turning 

Outwards,

Nothing is as it

Seems

Anymore.


That storm still rages

Begging to be set free.

You are trapped

Here

With tensions boiling over

And hope a desolate tundra.


The boy, Jack,

He keeps asking about his

Father.

You cannot bear the

Thought of talking about

Him.


For the one you love is

Gone.


So you sneak out,

Nighttime air heals

Open wounds.

But this wound will not

Heal.

So long as he’s not here. 


The wind

Overpowers your storm

And you have to

Let it go.

That all consuming anger

That has been consuming you.


You know that

Tears do not solve a

Problem like this.

But there is no stopping 

Them from

Falling.


For the one you love is

Gone.


You should not be here,

Crying in the rain.

Because the Winchesters

Always have bigger

Problems than this,

Don’t they?


But nothing is bigger than 

This.

Not Cas.

Because you

Loved him,

Didn’t you?


You never got to tell him

That.

You never got to tell him

That

You still love him,

With every fibre of your being.


There is

Nothing

That can be done.

For Castiel, the one you 

Love?

He is


Gone.

I was thinking...

… and this is the result: A lil theory based around the latest picture of Jackieboy Man.
(DISCLAIMER: I know I am imagining things. Seeing shit that is not there. But… Hear me out? Maybe?)

If you look at it… It looks somehow strange. And I’m not only talking about the mask being upside down. It took me quite some time to see that – the first thing I realized was simply that the picture looks - weird.

Due to the mask being upside down, it gives him a sad/desperate/unhappy look, because the holes for the eyes are turned the other way. I can’t really describe it, I hope you know what I mean… Just imagine the way you would draw eyebrows to give your character an either happy and heroic look or a sad and desperate one. Which leads to my next point: Jack must have either known that the mask is upside down, or at least noticed that it looks weird. This picture is Jackie’s ‘comeback-picture’, he’s a superhero… why give him this picture instead of a heroic and strong and brave looking one, like this one we all know: 

And now… ooh NOW we get to the really unrealistic and overanalyzed thoughts.
The caption of the Instagram post: “The world needs a hero.”
I remember that some time ago, Jack reblogged a post which said “What does Anti want?” and put in a gif saying “Some men just want to watch the world burn.”
And I think that’s a weird parallel.

Another thing: @miharukano said that due to the white lighting in the Instagram picture, his skin looks very pale. Paler than usual. Or at least paler than the last time we’ve seen him.

And the last thing. The caption of this post: “Was it ever the right side up?”
I keep thinking about this and it gives me strange vibes. I can’t even tell you why. It just seems to imply that in the old picture, the mask was ‘facing’ the right way, in the new picture it’s not, and… I don’t know, I don’t even know what I’m trying to say here! I have a thought but it keeps slipping away… Help me!! :D

THE CONCLUSION that could be made is simple: Jackie is already corrupted (he looks desperate) or Anti is playing pretend again (the mask is upside down). Sounds good. But I think that’s too easy.

Anyway, I’m sure that it’s nothing. I’m going crazy, that’s all.
I just wasted 30 minutes of my life writing this, you just wasted 3 to read it, and now let’s just celebrate Jackie’s comeback and look forward to a cameo. Maybe. Heck, we don’t even know for sure if he’ll be in a video.

(I’ll tag some peeps cuz i feel like it. Heh. @no-strings-puppet @aceofspades-lena @fear-is-nameless )

Whyyyyyyyyy

Does Tumblr have such an aversion to time stamps? Is it really that hard to include that info in the app? I know they display that info when you view posts in the browser / but who even does that anymore?

Apparently, I have failed miserably at maintaining my various ask holes (because they buried the fuck out of that shit) but now that I’ve located them, I can’t even tell how old the messages are. WTF?

Is it because they don’t want us to see which blogs are still active? Are these suggested blogs even current? Ever since I came back, I’ve been trying to refine my dash. So many ppl are gone now, my dash is like crickets. I’m trying to find new blogs to follow. But no matter how many of these recommended blogs I add, They don’t seem to yield any new content.

Whats the deal? Am I getting just crickets because that’s what Tumblr is now? Crickets and porn and like 30 ppl who post daily?

Btw, I follow almost 400 blogs.

But everyone knows that the Breccia Domain is more than an empty hole in the earth. Who knows what happened to the queens who were thrown down into the dark? Into the heart of the island, where the Goddess’s eye is always open. Who knows how she kept those queens or what she turned them into.

One Dark Throne by Kendare Blake wasn’t really what I was expecting… 

★★☆☆☆ You can read my full review on Goodreads here. 

Mutual: *is anti Severus*

Me: cool, it’s your opinion

Mutual: *tries to sway me to the anti side and argue*

Me: *inside* I see now you are too blinded by your ways. You’ve gone so far deep into the hole that I can not save you. I pity you you know. That you will never experience the snapedom in all its glory. You will never see the hair discourse, the broccoli discourse, or the makeup discourse. I pity you because you will never know the true meaning of friendship or happiness. I can’t save you but I can remember the good days of when we were younger and free of the pro and anti sides. I will hold the memories of those days and cherish them remembering the good times we shared. Goodbye dear friend

Me:*in the chat* *sobbing* Severus is beautiful and I love him.

anonymous asked:

im too afraid to sned u asks in case i set u off and u become emotional and sad and lost in thought and....i don't wanna hurt u.

Oh, no, send me as many asks as you like! All my complaining is really OTT melodrama entirely for the sake of cultivating an internet personality. I’m an extremely highly strung person but not in a way where anything I do in fandom actually upsets or hurts me in any way and I’m completely chill about it all :D 

If you ever think I’m upset unless it’s super serious context where someone would be legit upset rather than “omg this random thought about a TV show character is so distressing!!!!” I am just being a massive drama llama. 

Just picture me taking one look at some interesting meta, putting the back of my hand to my forehead, and sinking with a faint warbling noise onto a convenient sofa. Then cracking open one eye from behind my fan to see who’s rushing to get the smelling salts :D

anonymous asked:

Just imagine the overwhelming amount of love Robert will feel when he watches Aaron holding his son for the first time.

NONNIE THIS ASK HONESTLY BRIGHTENS UP MY DAYS AND NIGHTS AND GIVES ME LIFE AND WATERS MY CROPS AND FEEDS MY CHILDREN. ILYSFM, SORRY I TOOK SO LONG TO ANSWER. I DIDN’T WANT TO POST IT AT 1AM IN THE MORNING. IT WAS MY FAVE ASK I GOT LAST NIGHT THOUGH <333333

Can you imagine though?? I honestly don’t think he will really feel it, the full weight of FAMILY on his shoulders, until he sees Aaron with that babba. 

Not in the same way anyway. I’m sure he’ll love his son. Maybe… But Aaron holding him will mean something different. It will mean a future. A real chance. 

I feel like the loss of Aaron from the equation is why Robert fell down this particular rabbit hole of self-destruction with the Whites in the first place. Because like Aaron said, Robert would have been able to cope with fatherhood if he had Aaron beside him. Remember Robert’s smile: 

Originally posted by lizzzzoo

It’s like he’s thinking, “Yeah. Maybe. As long as I have you…” And then… As he opened himself up to the idea, little by little, in the end, it’s what destroyed them. Aaron couldn’t do it. I really trace back the death of Robert’s budding feelings for the baby to the moment Aaron walked out of his life. 

And now Robert feels about as alone as he could. What he said to Lawrence tonight (last night?) about being the outsider always looking in… Told within the context of a fucking huge deception, but no truer words have been spoken by Robbo for weeks (since he opened up to Liv). 

Originally posted by lizzzzoo

Aaron was the first and only person (since Sarah) to really accept him warts and all, to make him feel like he belonged. Like he didn’t have to pretend. Or manipulate. Or prevaricate. That he could just be. And what more does any good parent want for their child than to just be allowed to be? Without fear, consequence or restraint? To be safe? To be content? To be at peace? So of course, having Aaron Dingle in his son’s life would mean the world to Robert. In both their lives. 

Plus, Robert believes he himself is a shitty person. He doesn’t think much of Rebecca either. But Aaron? 

He’s the strongest damn person Robert knows: 

Originally posted by iloveyourcuteness

Robert also said during that pub conversation up there that the kid would grow up hating him, screwed up, without a chance. But if Aaron was there? If Aaron could influence the course of Baby Suggs life? If it was Aaron providing him with guidance and advice? Well, Robert need not worry. Aaron is literally the best person Robert knows. In the world. 

PLUS THERE’S JUST THE VERY PHYSICAL FACT THAT ROBERT KNOWS HOW COMFORTING AARON’S ARMS CAN BE. FIRST HAND:

Originally posted by lizzzzoo

So seeing his son take comfort from his husband? Physically? To see Aaron’s big tree trunk arms swaddling Baby Suggs in love? It would make him fall in love all over again. Go all warm and gooey inside. And we all know how babies love Aaron, how instantly they settle. Robert would be transfixed. I’ve spoken before about how Aaron is this strong protector, but they (babies and animals too) absolutely sense the softness at the centre of him. I have no doubt this baby will be no different. It will probably cry endlessly with Robert and Rebecca (if she survives), but when the poor little (motherless) mite is handed to Aaron, you just know he’ll calm right down. And Robert will be amazed. As he so often is, at just how wonderful Aaron is.

Originally posted by mygodthefeels

In addition, I think it would mean quite a lot to Robert to see Aaron overcome the cheating and the pregnancy and to want to be there for him. Not just because he knows how Aaron has suffered at the hands of his own Dad and how much it means to Aaron to be part of a loving family. But for Aaron to want to be involved. Robert wouldn’t feel so cast adrift. Their love gives Robert’s life meaning. Like I said, he’d feel like him and Baby Suggs had been handed a lifeline (especially if Rebecca is dead, which I’m really starting to suspect she will be)…

Originally posted by lizzzzoo

They’d be safe. Because Robert knows that left alone, with just him to raise the baby, there’s no chance of either of them being happy. 

But together? The pair of them? Robert and Aaron? A pack of kids racing about them? The oldest two, Liv and Baby Suggs, like him, are blondies. But the youngest three are absolutely the spit of Aaron, with dark curls and cheeky glinting blue eyes. A pile of muddy bikes outside the Mill door?

Originally posted by millcottage

A raucous hubbub of laughter and noise? Trying to keep track of them all? Robert never thought he’d drive a mini van but they need it to ferry them all about. Trips to the headmasters (Robron insist to everyone they’re good kids even if one or two of them skip school occasionally). Big family meals at the Mill dining table? Having to stretch out into the second flat as their brood grew? Robert being fantastic with his daughters, not standing for any sexism from the boys? Helping with homework? Aaron secretly lavishing affection on their oldest Baby Suggs? Making sure he never felt unwanted, unwelcome or unloved? It would make Robert cry. Actual tears. Not dry tear duct sobbing. But actual warm, wet tears of love. 

And he would trace the birth of that emotion right back to the moment Aaron first held their son. Aaron is the lighthouse that signals Robert home and steers him away from danger. Aaron is safety. Of course he’d want that for any of his children.

anonymous asked:

I read a post you posted a while ago about how you analyzed Ethan wanting to be in a relationship with a girl but he's in love with his brother and how Grayson is madly in love with Ethan. I completely agree I see it so much even when Grayson doesn't act like it. Even Grayson admitted that he's more sensitive and you can see he's more famine then Ethan I feel this hole love situation between them works out fine with the both of them unless they find partners that's better then the other.

Ethan feels like he’s constantly shifting between joy and depression… which could be a sign of Bipolar disorder. That’s def. not a diagnosis, but it is a caution to him.
A part of his issue I feel is that he’s unhappy, more with himself, than anything else.
Someone from the outside cannot really completely understand that, but at least a part of that is due to his complicated relationship with his brother.
They both strike me a jealous types, and they def. seem possessive of each other.
At the same time, it seems like no one can make them laugh, or smile as much as they can themselves. So yeah, it’s a complicated relationship.
The thing is also , that if Grethan is not real, then their issues are, actually, strangely enough deeper.
Why?
Well, let’s say they are straight/gay/bi, and are just very close; then they are so co-dependant and not allowing for intrusion from others, into their “sacred” sphere, that the possibility for other future relationships will be almost impossible (both friendships and sexual relationships)
If that is the case, then they need to, as soon as possible, look seriously at what they really want and need and then talk about being supportive towards that end.
The worst case scenario is that one of the twins is in love with the other, who cannot (even if he wanted to) return those feelings. Then we could have a case where one is sabotaging for the other, because he does not want to lose him, to a woman/man. In that case, as soon as they seem like they are finding someone else, and are getting slightly more independant, the other will do their very best (possibly not even realizing it) to wreck that, find a reason that it will not work and start drama or arguments.
This would mean that as soon as one of the twins find a little happiness, that little piece of joy will get knocked out of their hands, leaving them in a depressed state. More imortantly it will cause him to think that bo relationship will ever work. That’s one hell of a shitty situation. If that’s the case, then the one who is in love, is destroying the happiness of the one they believe they are loving, and supporting.
This is a case of heart break, of unrequited love and mental health.

anonymous asked:

My theory is that Mark killed himself and framed the Colonel for it to get back at him for sleeping with his wife. Or he was dead the hole time but that doesn’t really make much sense.

Well, the news clippings did say it was a possible suicide
And yeah, I thought that too at first

Pavo, Marluxia and Inferno showing off their shared home.

It’s a Juwel Primo 100l, split into three compartments with a custom built background. About 30l or 7gal per fish. Heater and filter are behind the protruding “rock” in Inferno’s corner to the right, and filter outlet is behind the fossil in Pavo’s corner, to the left.

The dividers themselves are made from food safe plastic sheets drilled full of holes so the water can flow freely, built into the “limestone” background. The bettas are vaguely aware of each other, but couldn’t care less. Never any flaring or patrolling, at most they’ll chill in the same corner before swimming along.

When I built it, I carved little caves and shelves that they really love - especially Marluxia always sleeps on his moss bed shelf in the top left corner of his “room”. :)

8

Holes (2003)

You, your children, and your children’s children will dig for the next 100 years,

                                                                                                                and you will never find it.