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53/100 days of productivity + SAT 12.03.16 // 7:52am

theme of the week: summer. november seasons (4/4);;;; it’s the last week of finals next week and i am so ready for christmas but for all you sunny people out there here’s a spread to commemorate the opposite season

Kẻ điên như tôi, ngoài em ra, thì chẳng có gì cả…

Tôi hiểu, có những thứ vốn dĩ không thuộc về mình, nhưng mình lại không nguyện ý từ bỏ, dẫu khổ đau cũng liều mạng níu giữ. Em biết không? Có thể gặp được người như em thật không dễ dàng, buông bỏ rồi sẽ rất tiếc nuối. Tôi biết, em cuối cùng vẫn rời đi, nhưng tôi vẫn cam tâm thản nhiên đón nhận mất mát đó! 

Bởi vì em là tất cả của tôi, ngoài em ra tôi không cần ai cả…

- Edison -

2.12.16// late study at the Philological library. I got at the Staatsbibliothek a fancy plastic bag to carry books inside so that I can have them all with me. I have my referat on Max Frisch in two days and I’m arranging the all presentation with a Kollegin. Hope we work together!

I PONDER OF SOMETHING TERRIFYING CAUSE THIS TIME THERE'S NO SOUND TO HIDE BEHIND I FIND OVER THE COURSE OF OUR HUMAN EXISTENCE ONE THING CONSISTS OF CONSISTENCE AND IT'S THAT WE'RE ALL BATTLING FEAR OH DEAR I DON'T KNOW IF WE KNOW WHY WE'RE HERE OH MY TOO DEEP PLEASE STOP THINKING I LIKED IT BETTER WHEN MY CAR HAD SOUND THERE ARE THINGS WE CAN DO BUT FROM THE THINGS THAT WORK THERE ARE ONLY TWO AND FROM THE TWO THAT WE CHOOSE TO DO PEACE WILL WIN AND FEAR WILL LOSE THERE'S FAITH AND THERE'S SLEEP WE NEED TO PICK ONE PLEASE BECAUSE FAITH IS TO BE AWAKE AND TO BE AWAKE IS FOR US TO THINK AND FOR US TO THINK IS TO BE ALIVE AND I WILL TRY WITH EVERY RHYME TO COME ACROSS LIKE I AM DYING TO LET YOU KNOW YOU NEED TO TRY TO THINK I HAVE THESE THOUGHTS SO OFTEN I OUGHT TO REPLACE THAT SLOT WITH WHAT I ONCE BOUGHT CAUSE SOMEBODY STOLE MY CAR RADIO AND NOW I JUST SIT IN SILENCE

reblog if you agree

•~ Okay So ~•

I usually use the Tumblr app to post things because I do not own a computer.

But for some reason it’s not letting me post anything.

I can save drafts and all that jazz, but when I try to post them they just vanish.

I tried deleting the app and redownloading it twice and nothing’s working, it’s the same deal for my personal tumblr as well.

The only reason this has shown up is because I’m using Safari on my phone.

But on there I can’t tag posts or add gifs so that’s another situation.

I’m gonna keep trying to figure it out but as of now posting is gonna be a little slow.

And I can’t even begin to tell you how much that annoys me.

But as of now there’s really nothing I can do.

I’m really really sorry about it, and I’m still trying to figure out what’s wrong.

on the language of “saving”

i’ve written a lot of rants recently so i’ll try to keep this one short(er).

for context: when Even is telling Isak about his dream wedding, he says, “after i’ve climbed up to the balcony i ask you: ‘what happens after I’ve saved you?’  you answer… i save you back.”

any mentally ill/neurodivergent person will recognize this as dangerously close to the trope of a mentally ill character being “saved” by their (almost always neurotypical) love interest, that love is somehow an all-powerful cure for depression, anxiety, ptsd, bipolar, bpd, you name it.

the only thing that’s really different this time is that Even is the one talking about being saved (when it’s usually the neurotypical saying “i’ll save you”) though admittedly in the context of an elaborate movie reference, not necessarily mental illness (but you know the skam writers will take us to hell and back with the double entendres).

there’s also the word itself, implying that mental illness is something you need saving from in the first place. mental illness is not the end of the world. mental illness requires therapy and medication and support and self care. not saving.

my point is. they’re walking a fine line. Isak can’t save Even from himself. this goes back to “only you can feel what you feel.” Isak can’t go down the same path as Sonja, who almost seems to consider it her duty to take care of Even . the best thing Isak can do is to love and support Even and to help Even take care of himself.