no no no no no no no don't want to contemplate this

oh my god. so do you ever tweet something stupid like “a yoi vampire au where victor let yuuri bite him during the sochi banquet”, and then your entire tl gangs up on you and makes you contemplate this in vivid detail until words come out.

——

Everyone knew that Yuuri Katsuki was a vampire.

It wasn’t much of a problem, these days. Viktor had had a vampire rinkmate once, when he’d just moved up to the junior division. Ivan hadn’t been any stronger or faster, and he’d only shrugged when Viktor asked about the blood.

“It’s like – wanting ice cream,” he’d tried to explain. “It’s good if you have it, but you don’t need it, yes?”

That’s what centuries of defensive breeding did for you. Humans far outnumbered vampires, after all.

So Yuuri Katsuki was a vampire, which didn’t mean as much as “Yuuri Katsuki has level 4 spins but can’t land a quad Salchow,” and Viktor wouldn’t have thought any more about it except that Yuuri Katsuki placed sixth at the Grand Prix Final in Sochi and got very drunk at the banquet, after.

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GOT7 in Miami Recap

MY RAMBLING RECAP, AS TOLD THROUGH A SERIES OF BULLET POINTS AND CAPS LOCK

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Voltron Ask Game

Shiro: What’s the one thing you have that keeps you going on life?

Allura: What are your best qualities?

Coran: Do you have anyone you’d follow to the ends of the universe to protect?

Keith: Do you prefer to be alone or surrounded by friends?

Lance: Describe your family.

Hunk: Is home a person or a place to you?

Pidge: Do you feel comfortable with who you are as you are now?

Zarkon: Do you ever contemplate world domination?

Thace: Would you betray everything you know for a personal reason/cause?

Nyma: Would you ever steal?

Rolo: What motivates you to do what you do?

Beezer: Who do you look up to?

Bonus

Klance: How gay are you? How would you approach someone you wanted to be close to? 

Sheith: Are you in love with anyone as of now?

Shallura: What type of person would you date, and why?

Hunk/Shay: Would you risk everything for someone?

an analytic approach to proving the nikiforov theorem

so a little while back i was briefly contemplating the mathematicians au of yuri on ice (why), and today it came back with a vengeance and hit me in the face. believe me, i deeply regret all the life choices that have led me to this place.

  • victor nikiforov is a rising star in russian mathematics, particularly known for his off-beat approach to familiar problems and a certain elegance that’s unmistakable. at sixteen he gets invited to a young mathematicians conference in sofia, where he gives a talk about certain properties of the elliptic curve.
  • some weeks later, yuuko, who’s been sharing little puzzles and problems with yuuri for as long as he can remember, finds him with a handful of papers printed from arxiv and says, “look.”
  • it’s the first time yuuri looks at a chain of logic, ruthlessly solid from beginning to end, and feels that certainty all the way through.
  • yuuri presses his fingers to the “victor nikiforov” printed primly under the title and thinks, i want to solve a problem with him. one day.

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The Long Walk

Today is Remembrance Day.

For the past 6 years Frank has made the journey from Camp Jupiter to Vancouver to visit his mother’s grave. It is the fourth year he has made the trip alone

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Last night I stayed up until the bitter end, cried myself out until I was more exhausted than I have been in a long, long time, and tried to get some sleep. Two hours later, I got up to go to school.

At school I looked students in the eye all day. Students who are Black and Latinx, almost exclusively. Who are from immigrant families or immigrants themselves. Who are disabled. Who are queer. Who are women. Who want answers. Who trust that I, somehow, can give them.

Today I and every teacher I saw made ourselves raw with talking about this. I left school shaking and I might still be. It is my job to explain to these kids what happened, to assuage their fears, to listen to their thoughts and tell them I stand with them, we stand with them, a vote does not mean there are no longer good people behind them.

All day I wanted to ask my mentor-teacher if I was doing this right, to settle my fears that I too was failing these kids again, because how the hell do you handle this?

You tell students about it in the same way I’m telling you, by and large, I guess I’ve learned.

Elections in the US rely on a peaceful transfer of power and we have to let that happen, but as Secretary Hillary Rodham Clinton said in her concession speech today, that does not mean allowing bigotry. Bigotry is not a democratic value, and I refuse to let it slip in as one (Huffington Post: What do we tell the Children?)

We get angry. We get sad and angry and we grieve and we shout and we find our safe space to do this in and we don’t let anyone take that away from us, and we don’t let anyone take it away from our friends, our neighbors. We process, we prepare.

We survive. We survive out of spite and then we thrive out of spite when we can. We look out for our fellows and or neighbors because we are still decent human beings and we do not let that value be hidden.

We fight. We find our causes and we step in, on whatever level is the level for us. We vote in every election, from the most seemingly inconsequential town election on up. We prepare for the midterms. We know our congresspeople and we know our preferred way to contact them. We keep the pressure on Congress.

We be the record keepers. We do not allow the world to forget what happens, so next time we’re here, next time the country is divided on such lines, next time bigotry is on the ballot, next time the sharpest and most evident ideological and economic divide in America we have seen becomes evident, we handle it differently.

And then we look ahead. We allow no one to forget. We keep our fights moving, we keep planning and adapting and fixing. We keep protecting and surviving and never, ever plan to stop.

That’s what I told my students today. That’s what I’ll tell you. Last night was a tragedy, it was emotionally devastating, and on many ways I cannot physically engage right now. But Secretary Clinton gave us a well thought out, beautiful, powerful concession speech, and I am going to listen to her. Nothing I’ve said here is easy, and Secretary Clinton knew that when she spoke too. Nothing here sounds even remotely easy, especially to some of us. For me, mourning and then surviving is all I can expect and ask from anyone. But this is my plan, for me. I’m mourning and grieving, but when I’m ready, I’ll move on, and I’ll look forward, and I will make double sure to look out for my neighbors, because if we don’t look that way, the future isn’t going to look much better.

One day you’ll be on a sidewalk somewhere, carrying a cup of coffee that you mistook for hot chocolate
People will hurry past you, trying to find validation,
(Or perhaps they simply want to get out of the cold;)
You’ll be making a mental list of everything you love

And the next day, or maybe a few days later
You’ll find yourself sitting on a bench in Central Park, surrounded by the crisp colors of autumn
Groups of people will pass by you occasionally,
Most will be wearing smiles as they soak up the sun dappling through the branches

You’ll have a journal out, a pen in hand, and you’ll write down that list of the things you love
When you take a deep breath, you’ll smell the snow that’s bound to come in another week or two;

After a moment of contemplation, you’ll add yourself to that list with a sigh of relief
— 

autumn, snow, coffee (suggested by spooky-scary-spiderman) | a.h

send me three words and I’ll write a poem with them!

On Viktor Nikiforov

Ok I’m gonna begin this whole post by saying I love Viktor the most, he’s my favorite Yuri!!! on Ice character, and I wanna put my own thoughts about Viktor out there too. As these are my personal opinions, you’re welcome to agree, disagree, or ignore them completely, but I wanted to analyze his character as someone who likes him the most out of the show.


On his personality: Guys. I want to start by saying there’s only been three episodes. Three. Episodes. So far, Viktor is flashy, confident, silly, charming, blunt/direct, and contemplative.

And I know we’ve gotten Yurio’s internal monologue and bit more depth in his character, but that’s for two reasons–one, we have to see what he’s thinking, otherwise he’ll look like a selfish brat who just wants Viktor to himself for no reason other than “Yuuri doesn’t deserve him” and two, they have to set up Yurio’s background and motives for ice skating to make him a worthy rival for Yuuri. Otherwise he’d be a boring, bratty punk who needs a muzzle.

So, going into Viktor, we have to think of what we’ve seen so far, where the story is going, and what sort of relationship Yuuri has with Viktor too. From Yuuri’s perspective as the main character, Viktor was his elusive idol, and someone who always surprised people (Yurio has mentioned that Viktor is all about surprising the audience too). At the end of the first episode, Yuuri himself says that he never knows what to expect from Viktor either. Because we are watching the show largely from Yuuri’s point of view as the main character, we have to be surprised by Viktor as well to relate with Yuuri.

Therefore, we can’t know what Viktor is thinking. Not yet. There needs to be more development in their relationship, to the point that Yuuri begins to understand Viktor better or Yuuri wants to understand Viktor more, for us to actually see what Viktor truly thinks and feels. As of episode three, they’ve only just become coach and student without any obstacles, so this is the point where there relationship together will really start developing.

On other note, we have to think of things from Viktor’s perspective as well. Viktor is an adult. And I know the argument can be made the Yuuri is an adult too, but as someone only two years younger than Yuuri, at this age, you’re not really “an adult.” You’re still figuring yourself out, and that makes Yuuri a really relatable and great main character. I identify with a lot of his thought processes and melt downs (to the point that’s it’s a little sad but I like Yuuri a lot because of that).

But that’s not the case with Viktor. Viktor has been in the spotlight as a champion figure skater for the majority of his life, a talented genius that always outperformed everyone on the ice. Having those kinds of expectations and ideals placed on you since you were at least 16 years old is a lot to handle, and you have to have a certain decorum about yourself when everyone watches you. Viktor acts in a way he feels will satisfy and entertain people, and we know he’s been doing this for at least 11 years.

He’s a sports celebrity, and rather than reveal his personal feelings for media fodder, he’s developed a persona as “Viktor Nikiforov, the champion figure skater and most wanted bachelor of the world.” That’s an intricate mask to hide yourself behind, and if we want to see who Viktor really is, who he is outside the public eye, Yuuri needs to know him on a very intimate level that just isn’t there yet. Yurio, who had the same coach and practiced on the same rink, knew Viktor closer, so that’s how he knew Viktor was at a block in his career where people just weren’t surprised by his routines anymore. I don’t think Viktor will reveal how he feels until Yuuri rips the mask of Viktor’s persona off on his own.

Viktor’s true personality and thoughts, the origins of his career, and many other factors about him could be part of the reason why Viktor decided to take a break in his skating to coach Yuuri, so I think they’re doing well with keeping Viktor’s motives under wraps for now to reveal for later.

On the hugs in episode three: So, people have been saying the way Viktor didn’t smile or anything when Yuuri hugged him before performing was shady af, but let me explain my viewpoint on it briefly–Yuuri was on the verge of what could have been a panic attack. Viktor tends to be cheerful and a little silly, so his reaction caught people off guard, but I think he did the right thing. Yuuri was extremely anxious in that moment, and hugged Viktor, his idol, his goal for his whole career, out of panic; Yuuri didn’t want to lose Viktor more than anything in that moment.

If Viktor did his usual heart shaped smile, patted Yuuri on the back with a laugh in his voice and said “everthing will be all right, so get out there!” it would have looked like he was brushing off Yuuri’s feelings and I don’t think Yuuri would have been able to calm down. Yuuri didn’t necessarily need comfort in that moment, he needed acknowledgement. He’s wanted Viktor’s acknowledgement since he began seriously skating, so he asked Viktor to watch him. Viktor saw that, and answered him in complete seriousness. And I think Yuuri appreciated that.

After Yuuri finished his routine, that’s when the comforting and cutesy Viktor returned, and he hugged Yuuri in celebration and confirmation of his efforts. Viktor can be light and cheery again, because Yuuri met his expectations, but his voice dropped to seriousness at the last second before he went into “coach mode.” Viktor looks at every situation and acts accordingly, which I think is admirable and something he developed while being such a public and popular figure.

On his selfishness: I know this is the main reason people are skeptical of Viktor. His own coach said that he’s too selfish to be a coach, and to an extent, I agree. But that’s only because I think Viktor needs to grow as a coach alongside Yuuri growing as a figure skating champion.

I think rather than truly selfish, Viktor is really one-track minded. He gets an idea in his head and wants to pursue it, so regardless of what anyone says, he’ll do whatever it takes to get what he wants. In this case he wanted to coach Yuuri. The two of them are going to mold each other through the progression of this show.

It makes sense, if you saw what his coach said before he flew off, “You never listen to me in the first place!” and given how driven we’ve seen Viktor be, it can be assumed that his talent and the success in his career is largely from his focus on obtaining his goals through his own means.

This also ties into his forgetfulness–Viktor is so dead-set on whatever is on his mind that anything extraneous falls away from his thoughts. So I don’t think Viktor is being intentionally flaky, but he genuinely just forgot in the pursuit of his own objectives.

If we look at how Viktor made the promise with Yurio in the first place, we can already see a good basis for him being a coach. Viktor recognized Yurio’s talent and gave him a challenge that he could see Yurio handling, and told him he believed in him. It sucks that Viktor never kept up his end of the bargain because becoming a coach for Yuuri kind of blew his promise to Yurio out of the water, but I don’t believe Viktor was being malicious in any way. Plans change.

On the Eros story: If I’m being completely honest, I think you guys are over analyzing this. Yuuri came up with that story on his own to rationalize the program of Eros for himself, and he may have been projecting the story on Viktor, but I don’t think the story can be used as a premonition for the entire the series. The integral part of that story was to show that Yuuri made the Eros program his own in a completely unexpected way: rather than live up to being a playboy like he could see Viktor being in the story, he decided to approach the story in a viewpoint more similar to his, taking the stance of the most beautiful woman in town. This is an important development, because not only does Yuuri find himself in the Eros piece, but he also makes a conscious effort to stop copying Viktor and find himself in this program. This does parallel Viktor and Yuuri’s relationship a bit, but I don’t believe this could ever be an overarching theme in the series. If we just look at the credits for the episodes, I don’t think they would put so much effort in animating a character that would turn around and betray Yuuri for personal his gain.

That’s not to say I believe the two of them will have a perfect relationship; Viktor and Yuuri will have to hit a wall eventually in their relationship as coach and athlete. There will come a point when Viktor is too demanding for Yuuri, and Yuuri will explode back in frustration of not being adequate for Viktor’s standards. And at this point, the two of them will need a break to reevaluate their own flaws and strengths in understanding each other and this could be a big opportunity for more insight into Viktor’s character.


Well, I’ve said my piece, and if you read this entire monstrosity of “I Love Viktor” I hope you liked it or at least gleamed some appreciation for Viktor from it… Idk when I love a character I try to figure out everything about them and this is all I’ve gotten on Viktor so far from the three episodes out…

anonymous asked:

So I just finished tearing through Game Theory/Five Thrones, and I have one burning question...what poor therapist has to deal with Ash and his "mafia underworld" issues? Because I'm just picturing poor Ash trying to explain the situation without giving anything away, and the therapist can tell he's lying about something....Have you ever considered a one-shot following one of their appointments?

Lol, I don’t know if I’ll ever write a oneshot about it, but while it’s like amusing to contemplate, it’s actually not that rare for clients to lie about their circumstances to still access therapy. I mean it’s kind of a sad / realistic reality for those who are in certain stratas of society (especially criminal gangs, but not only that) they sort of have to present the staging of a lie to get to the emotional truths without compromising their lives.

And it’s still more than possible to actually do therapy within that context. The therapist almost certainly knows he’s lying, but as with most therapists, they accept that in order to see if they can truly help with what the fundamental issues are, and trust that if necessary, the truth will come out later on. It’s definitely not like… Ash isn’t ‘unique’ in that sense. I mean he’s unique in that he’s fae, but he’s not unique for being someone who is living in a situation he doesn’t feel he can share with others.

Hell, even teenagers do it to therapists because they don’t want to talk about their home life if it’s particularly difficult. Diverting through ‘I have a friend who is going through this and I want to help them what do you recommend’ when it’s sometimes apparent that the person is talking about themselves, is something that there are peer reviewed articles written about in the world of psychology and psychotherapy - and most of the time, the recommendation is generally ‘accept that they feel they have a good reason to lie, and explore how you can help them regardless.’

So yeah, that therapist is actually handling things pretty well. I mean I’m pretty sure she initially thought ‘mafia’ and then after a while just thought ‘whatever, there’s some profound family issues and boundary matters here, as well as attachment/abandonment problems, and I can work on that regardless of what the window dressing looks like.’ I doubt she’d even push to know the ‘truth.’ As long as Ash is being transparent about his emotional state (and Ash is actually pretty good at that), she can help him function better and improve his quality of life. And that’s her job.

I mean Ash thinks like ‘oh no, the poor thing, I can’t even tell her the truth’ but Ash doesn’t really understand the training that therapists experience, and for all that he loves humans, he sometimes…underestimates how much they see too, lol. I’m pretty sure the therapist felt out of her depth for all of about two sessions before she realised that Ash had the same kind of issues that a lot of people do, heh. :D

Okay, but… self indulgent little fantasy, because I do what I want.

One day Sam comes back to the Bunker and Dean’s right there. “I thought you were getting groceries?”


Sam blinks once, not realizing they needed anything badly enough that Dean was seemingly waiting on his return.

“Oh, um… no. Sorry.”

“Okay.” Dean pauses, looking him over, and seeing him empty handed, not in his running gear, he narrows his eyes. “Well, where were you?”

“Um…” Sam contemplates a moment before answering. He knew it would come to this eventually, and he’s not been hiding it intentionally, he just… hasn’t said anything because Dean hasn’t asked. Now that he is asking, Sam takes a breath and answers honestly. “I see someone in town.” 

“Dude,” Dean looks a little surprised before his expression turns sly. “You’ve got some chick in town you been keepin’ all to yourself?”

“What?” Sam starts, surprised even though he shouldn’t be. Dean would go there first, always so insecure even while he hides it behind that over-the-top, lewd look he’s giving Sam right now. Sam shakes his head resolutely. “No, Dean, like… a psychiatrist. I talk to a therapist. I’ve been going once a week or so for a while now, actually.”

It’s Dean’s turn to blink at Sam. He clearly doesn’t know what to do with that, and his mouth forms a silent, unspoken “oh” before his lips purse together tightly and then he looks considering, vaguely curious.

“And… you tell this person–” Dean looks skeptical and Sam knows where he’s going immediately, cuts him off.

“No, Dean, I obviously don’t tell them the truth, Jesus. But… it still helps. A lot, actually.”

Dean looks considering again. Sam is watching him keenly, wondering and waiting to see if Dean’s going to make a thing about it. 

“Huh. Well, that’s… that’s good, then.” Dean kind of shrugs when he looks at Sam then, nodding once before turning around and disappearing back into the Bunker. Sam sighs, not realizing he had been holding his breath. That went better than expected, he supposes. And yet, he’s really not sure what Dean makes of it. 

They get caught up in a case later that afternoon and Sam doesn’t give much thought to their conversation. He figured that would be the end of it, but nearly a week later as they’re making the drive back to Lebanon, the monster of the week lying in ashes, Sam can tell there’s something on his big brother’s mind. He clearly wants to say something but can’t quite get himself to that point. After a while, Sam silently reaches over between them to take Dean’s hand in his. He rests their hands together on top of Dean’s leg and he can feel his brother’s nervous energy start to settle with just that little gesture. Sam tells him it’s okay, whatever you want to say, say it or don’t but it’s okay without using any words at all. It’s not too long later that Dean finally clears his throat.

“So, this shrink–” 

“Doctor,” Sam interjects gently.

“Yeah, whatever,” Dean shoots back automatically, rolling his eyes but obviously relaxing a little, taking comfort in their familiar kind of banter. He swallows thickly while Sam watches him patiently. He’s squeezing Sam’s hand a little in his lap.

“They um… talking to ‘em…  it really helps?” He doesn’t look at Sam when he asks, eyes stubbornly – safely, in more ways than one – on the road. Sam still smiles softly when he answers.

“Yeah, Dean, it does. A lot, actually.”

There’s another long pause and Dean keeps his eyes on the road and his teeth buried in his bottom lip until he finally glances over at his little brother.

“Okay well… maybe… do you think that… maybe I could…?” He doesn’t find the rest of the words to say what he’s asking but Sam understands him all the same. Sam is stunned and so overjoyed he barely knows what to say, because he’s wished for this for Dean for forever. His heart swells with all kinds of love and also pride, because Dean just keeps surprising him in all the best ways. He barely resists the impulse to take his brother’s face in both hands and kiss him breathless.

“Yeah, of course. Absolutely, yes.” 

familiarity

fandom: girl meets world
pairing: riley matthews & lucas friar 
word count: 1,462 words 
summary: in which texan loner lucas friar contemplates strange duck riley matthews. // or lucas’ thoughts during world of terror 3 and the conversation that occurs when they’re alone in the school hallway.

read on ao3 

As Lucas stalked through the back hallway of Abigail Adams High School, he had to briefly consider to himself why he even cared that much. He and Riley Matthews had only spoken a handful of words to each other, before yesterday’s conversation between them at the cafe, in the two years that he had lived in New York. He really had no idea why he cared so much about what happened to her, or why he had almost opened up to her during their conversation yesterday.

There was just something about her that seemed, familiar to him, almost. He really didn’t know how to describe and honestly, he was trying his hardest to ignore it, he didn’t want to care about anyone. He had spent two years all by himself, and he had been doing just fine. The last thing he needed was to care too much about someone and have a repeat of what happened back in Texas.

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‘This better be the right damned address’, Jess mumbled under her breath as she stepped up to the apartment door, giving it three good raps with her knuckles.  It was time for her yearly routine - making a buy, taking it home, staring at it for a few hours while she contemplated ruining over a decade of sobriety, and then typically flushing it down the toilet - but this year had been so rough…..The thought of actually using was becoming more and more palatable with each rough day.   An old friend from her junkie days had mentioned that Marco was back in town, thought they couldn’t say much more than that.  He was the one dealer that Jess trusted, as messed up as that sounded.  With the support of the landlord (who she had bought out with a dozen donuts and a quick session of grab-ass), Jess had figured he was back at his old stomping grounds and decided to pay him a visit.

The jokes rolled out before she could really stop them - an old habit that acted up when she got nervous.  It had been so long - what if he really had gone straight? What he was working for the cops now? There were a lot of things in life that she wasn’t in the right place to tolerate - and a stint in Clark County lockup for possession was definitely one of them. “It’s your friendly neighborhood avon lady, here to talk about the benefits of paying a ridiculous chunk of change for the privilege of smearing some shit on your face that may or may not actually make everything worse!”

@marcojaguado

I can see the rest of my life with you and that scares the shit out of me. I didn’t even want to contemplate commitment until 30 years of age. You are it and it disgusts me. I wouldn’t mind cleaning your shit if you were incapable and I’d change your bed pans when we were old and gray. You make me happy even when you make me mad. I want you here. Just you. Sigh, somebody shoot me.

Speculations about OeGs aside, I think that the most interesting thing about this redraw is that we finally got to see Hide’s expression when he first takes a look at Rize.
I can’t post pictures because I’m on phone rn, but that contemplative and curious look Hide puts on is the same wide-eyed and tight-lipped face he makes right before he tells Touka about Kaneki’s habit of touching his chin. The ‘I just came to a realization’ face.
I’m not implying anything with this. He might have gotten a bad feeling about her (since he probably can see through her fake innocent front), or maybe it was something else entirely. Maybe I’m just seeing things. I just thought it would be interesting to note.

Verryfinny x Ignis Scientia at a cafe

Check out this BEAUTIFUL art commission fulfilled by @niuniente​! Can you see the chemistry Ignis and I have together? See it? SEE IT?! …see how he looks so done with me. Isn’t it just so perfect?

Be sure to check out Niu’s art HERE and give a follow if you want some quality content and a lovely person on your dash. If you’re interested in commissions, simply send her a message and go from there!

;-;

It’s late, but ah, good evening everyone! I’ll explain in a post either tomorrow or later on, but I just wanted to apologize for my absence / hiatus and say that I’m back! Well, erm, tentatively.

To sum things up for now, my health has been a bit of a nightmare for my parents, doctors, and I for the past month or so, depression hit me probably the hardest it has in a while, and I just… have been having a really hard time coping with a lot of stress and recovery and just everything in general. I’d like to say that things are, hopefully, settling down but we’ll see.

I missed you all a lot… I just really, really needed time away because I could not function as a human being and God, I was so, so fucking lost and hurt and just not myself. I couldn’t – no, I did not want anyone to see how pathetic I was. I wouldn’t wish upon anyone to feel how I felt for the past time I was gone; no one deserves to feel like that, not even my worst enemies.

An Understanding

The sound of crayon on paper.

“So,” the artist says, not looking up.

“So,” Frisk says.

They’re sitting, crouched like a cat, on a Chara’s bedside table. They are also the table, and the picture frame that has currently stuck into their avatar and broken it apart slightly already, to which they pay no mind. They are also the Chara, and the crayons, and the paper.

In a way, when they talk, they talk to themselves, always.

“So explain to me how it works, then,” the Chara says, briefly pausing to point the black crayon at them, red eyes narrowing. The end has been chewed. “And don’t say I wouldn’t understand.”

“I wouldn’t say that.” It would be mean, after all. And unnecessary, because Chara will…

“You mean you don’t say that. You just loudly imply it.” They return to their task.

Already know.

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