no no don't mind me

Have you ever had someone lay their fingers along the spaces between your ribs and squeeze? Really find those fleshy bits between the bones and just curl into them? I have. The thing is, you can’t help your natural reflex in reaction to that strange, visceral, intrusive feeling. Your body knows, “hey, I don’t think I should be touched there!” and so it flails wildly, almost manically, to protect your most vital organs, even if there’s no real threat.

My wife loves the spaces between my ribs, but has kindly refrained from squeezing them since I’ve asked her to stop. Still. I’m a nervous person, and the guard just goes up sometimes – can’t help it.

The other night, we were laying in bed and cuddling, and I was about on the brink of passing out while baby lay curled over me. Her hand rested on my chest, her head lay nestled between my shoulder and my chin, and I was smelling her hair – a vague scent of shampoo, still a little wet from the shower. Everything felt warm and right and peaceful, but for the fact that (as exhausted as I was) baby was like a shaken up soda can of hyperactive lesbian. She was happily chatting away when her hand traveled a little lower, then circled around my side and her fingertips moved into those vulnerable little dips.

“Noooooooo,” I whined, and I yanked her hand away.

“But I can’t sleep!” She protested, laying her leg over mine and lifting her head to give me that wide-eyed, entreating look. “I won’t squeeze! I just want to count your ribs! It’s soothing.” I can never deny her anything when she gives me that look. (She has very long eyelashes and very blue eyes. It’s my kryptonite.)

So I let her hand go, cautiously, and relaxed a little bit. She teases and jokes, but she never lies to me, so I knew she’d at least stop herself from squeezing even though I know how much she loves it. She moved her hand back over to my rib cage and I took in a breath.

“You know,” I offered as her fingertips began to dance gently over each individual rib, “you could count sheep instead.”

And baby chuckled lowly, snuggling closer, warm and soft and sweet. And then she proceeded to say the most terrifying thing I’ve ever heard come out of her mouth, in a voice that sounded like it should have been wafting inexplicably down the halls of an abandoned building.

“There are no sheep here,” she whispered, “but there are plenty of your bones.”

And somehow that simple statement was more instinctively horrifying than the feeling of fingers in the spaces between your ribs. Turns out, it inspired the same reaction. I flailed, and she laughed and laughed and laughed until I was laughing too.

It took us both a while to go to sleep.

9

@pinkislouder 😊 !! thanks for tagging me to do a september 🍁moodboard from pictures on my phone. i’m tagging @alicedoesntsharefood @justlookatthehearteyes @massivelydeepdreamland @undercutzayn @la-paritalienne

hate and negativity are hurtful things but coming from people close to you idk it just wrecks you. don’t be that person. don’t hate on others, don’t bring others down just to lift yourself up, that’s not how it should work. please promise me you’ll try to spread as much love and positivity as you can. you don’t even know what an impact you make. you’ll be making others happy but most importantly yourself. always.💛

Rant

You shame his addiction when you know 2 years ago he got in a horrible car accident where he got put on pain medication and got dependent on them. They drug tested him and came back he had THC in his system because the medication worked better when he smoked with it. Because of this they cut him off completely not leaning him off just completely cold turkey cut off. Cut off of something he really needed because his back is permanently fucked now for the rest of his life and he’s in constant pain. Cut off from something he was already dependent.

He turned to look for pills on the street and then it turned into heroine because pills were harder to find and once he tried it was a better pain “medicine” than the pills.

His doctors were the one that cut him off. If they never did that he would of never done heroine. He had no other choice he felt like. Every other doctor he went to wouldn’t give him anything and then insurance became a problem too. So instead of shaming someone for taking an opiate or have an addiction.

You’d be surprised how many “addicts” started using because they got kicked off pain meds. When you’re in that much pain you’d wanna do anything to take the pain away.


I just recently met a girl who is a cancer survivor. She had her leg amputated. She’s in constant pain. Her doctors will not give her any pain meds because they don’t feel like she needs it and they clash with her other meds (when in fact they actually don’t at all). She contacted my bf as a last resort to see where she could get pills for her because she admitted if she couldn’t find it she would of most likely turned to heroine because the pain was so bad. She’s not an addict. She’s a patient in pain and needs help and no doctor wants to help her. She’s now looking for more doctors but reading the texts she sent him made me want to cry because no one should be going through something like this. She’s a survivor, an amputee and a mother. You kick her off the meds that help her with pain how do you expect her to function like a mother? Or a human for that matter when she’s in constant pain? She can’t. Her bf had to put her in a shopping cart because it was too painful to keep walking.

It’s really really disgusting when people shame addicts and think they’re better than them because they don’t smoke or do drugs. You don’t know the entire story. Before opening your mouth again maybe you should take a good look in the mirror. It doesn’t make you a better person. If you have nothing nice to say then shut the fuck up. Most do not choose to be this way so please stop trying to knock them down when they’re already at their lowest.

It makes me sick to my stomach that this is still a thing and it blows my mind that you think you’re a nice person when you say the most horrible cruelest shit I’ve ever heard. Disgusted.

2

Haha excuse my baby face 😂 (I love this filter tho)

I was tagged by @taev-gucci to the bias selfie tag, like ages ago lol !!! (I forgot that I’ve even been tagged tbh🙈). Thank you, sweets❤😘 (you are literally so prettty I can’t even✨)

Tagging: @emmaegedalj @mariemeetslife @randomlazymusiclover @frozenaprincess @pcy-suga @kthyunngg @lovely-bangtan7 @mackncheese2 @jiminnie-jams @jungkook-e @sodie-pops @returnofthesquishies @vikiboo2001 @prkjmntrxsh @ayeeitsemry @je0n AND basically everyone who sees this!!!
Don’t feel pressured to do this😊 (feel free to ignore me if you want / or if you have done this tag already) I’m just super curious about my mutuals :)

Stop scrolling real quick.

Take a minute to think of your very first OTP. The first thing you’ve ever shipped. It’s probably super irrelevant now, and nothing in comparison to your current ships and pairings, but it’s still important. You’ve got a tender part of your heart still reserved for that ship and it’ll never truly go away. You might forget it, you might not recall even the memory of loving it, but you did. It’s still there. And there’s something lovely in remembering it, so, take the time right now to let yourself get a little nostalgic. Search that ship in the Tumblr tags. Remember the good old days for a moment.


alright, continue scrolling

Working on a smut bit while sitting in an empty college hallway with music blasting through my headphones.

Thank you guys for the love so far on the first bit of the sequel.  I wish I could describe how happy it makes me.