no never apologize for bird

anonymous asked:

paladins playing dnd - who would be what do you think? *if you aren't familiar with dnd you don't have to answer this lol

I’m passingly familiar with the concept at least.  So here goes!

Pidge - Bard. She doesn’t roleplay much, and she can’t even be bothered to do an accent usually (because she sucks at it, but she won’t admit it).  But Pidge knows how to rig a game, and bards have a lot of potential in terms of how to break things in the most spectacular way.  But she wants everyone to stop insisting she talk in rhyme.  It’s not going to happen.  Shut up or eat lyre. (And this is assuming she’s not DM)

Lance - Paladin.  He’s the Hero, dammit, and he’s going to save all the damsels and fight all the monsters and be the strongest and the handsomest.  Probably roleplays the most out of the bunch, but it’s not usually what one would call deeply characterized.  Still, he has a lot of fun, and he has terrible luck with the dice, which leads to a lot of amusing situations.  He’s also the one to remember all the stupid jokes that crop up and bring them back up later, and he sits there beaming like a smug loon while everyone else loses their shit.

Keith - Ranger.  He wasn’t really familiar with any of it to start, and so he had Pidge help set him up with something pretty easy to understand.  His backstory is being a feral child because Pidge thinks she’s funny and Shiro makes Disappointed Faces at her whenever she smirks about it.  But he gets into it, and not only does he have good instincts about how to apply his stats for the best results, but he barely ever rolls badly (but when he does, it’s a SPECTACULAR failure and they never let him live it down).  Has gotten into the more roleplay-ish aspects as time goes on, and he likes coming up with clever solutions to problems.

Hunk - Wizard.  “Really?  Good luck in combat, man,” Pidge says.  Hunk just arches an eyebrow and smirks.  Because he can hold in own in combat, but where Hunk shines?  There is no obstacle that Hunk cannot best.  Is there something blocking the way that’s supposed to be saved for later?  Too bad, Hunk is getting over it.  Does the party have a map but no idea where to go?  Hunk has a spell for that.  And besides, he gets to be a wizard!  It’s fun, you guys.  Has officially been banned from using the phrase ‘A wizard did it’ ever again.  EVER.

Shiro - Thief/Rogue.  Originally he picked it because of it’s use, but after breaking up at least four fights between Lance and Keith, trying to stop Pidge from making every conflict moot and stopping Hunk from totally undoing the narrative, Shiro gives up.  Just utterly.  He goes full Chaotic Neutral and there’s not a single thing anyone can do to stop him.  There’s a sleeping enemy on the field?  Shiro throws a knife at it.  The palace guard is looking for a bribe to let them in?  Shiro throws a punch.  Fuck responsibility, fuck the narrative, fuck doing the right thing, that’s not Shiro’s job anymore.  Is personally responsible for most of the ‘Totally Avoidable Stupid Shit’ that’s gone down.  And if any of them have anything to say about it, he has the Goddamn Receipts, and his are from real life.  Try it.  He’s waiting.  Shiro remembers everything they’ve said and done in the field that made him want to give up and let Zarkon take over the universe.  Now it’s their turn.