no nausea

I think sometimes I make out that arguments and disagreeing is something to be proud of, that it suggests backbone, but actually, after walking away from one, I always feel a little nauseas and self-conscious for a while afterwards.

Taurus, ruled by Venus, isn’t as diplomatic as Libra due to the fixed modality, but there is still that internalised need for harmony.

stomach: hey so ur hungry
blood sugar: yeah seriously, you should get food
me: sounds like a good plan! 
stomach, to brain: except everything is nauseating
body: hey wait don’t i get a say - 
brain: NAUSEA AT FOOD GOT IT STOMACH OLD BUDDY OLD PAL
me, dying: pls i just. want some blueberries. pls.

Mi veniva da piangere, ma non ci riuscivo. Provavo solo un'amara stanchezza, una nausea triste: quanto ti senti giù, che più a terra non potresti.
—  Charles Bukowski
@ people who have food issues cause of their illness

im sorry if eating has become more of a burden than a pleasure for you

im sorry if people dont understand and think youre just a picky eater

im sorry if youre afraid to eat, afraid of the pain or concequences that come with eating

im sorry if you cant talk about your food issues because its an “inappropriate topic” to bring up.

im sorry if people feel like theyre entitled to know your issues, im sorry if youve been robbed of that personal privacy.

im sorry if going to restaurants is really hard for you, you dont deserve to go through this, to have something that should be fun made into a hell

im sorry if you have to watch other people eat food that you love and that you cant eat cause of your illness.

im sorry if you have to starve all day when you go out because the place youre at has nothing you can eat

im sorry if you cant go out and be carefree about what you have to eat because you have to worry about what itll do to you

im sorry if theres a type of food you loved and you had to give up cause of your illness

im really sorry people think that youre just complaining over nothing when you talk about how much you miss not worrying or not being able to eat a type of food,

you have every right to mourn what your illness has taken from you, whether it be the food itself, the love of eating, the lack of worry, or the concequences of eating something, etc etc.

im sorry if the holidays have turned into the worst times for you, im sorry if family or friends arent understanding or if just watching everyone be able to eat anything any time they want makes you upset.

you have every right to any emotion this makes you feel

im sorry if people push off your issues to “oh if they just ate less/more theyd feel better”

im sorry if youre told to stop complaining because you “dont have it that bad”

you matter

your issues matter

and you will get through this.

theres alot of other things, im sure, butthis is all i can think of for now.

That mentally ill feel™ when you can’t tell physical sickness from symptoms.

Am I nauseous or anxious?
Am I having trouble breathing or a panic attack?
Am I experiencing a headache or brain fog?
Am I light-headed or disassociating?
Am I injured or hallucinating?
Am I in danger or experiencing delusions?

The world will never know