no matter how many times you watch it

Youtube Rewind: It’s time to look back on the best parts of youtube during 2016
  1. That one guy who goes on two hour rants about political shit and keeps showing up in your recommendations no matter how many times you tell youtube that you don’t want to see his shitty content.
  2. Some horrible gaming Top 10 channel that you watched 3000 hours of despite hating all of their lazy content.
  3. 24/7 livestream of a crosswalk.
  4. Another video about keemstar getting into drama. This time he doxxed a four year old and Ethan from H3H3 is pissed, but Leafy is standing in solidarity with him and Grade A Under A is coming in to dish out the real truth about the situation. Also, who the fuck are any of these people?
  5. YouTube Red Originals. PewDiePie now has a show about visiting haunted houses or something? Markiplier is like an actor or a dancer or some shit and has a fucking reality show? They both look so dead inside. They have less views than the youtube poops you made when you were 12.

okay, time for some math for how long it will take to watch this (albeit extremely rough)

it will take you 7 days, 16 hours to watch every episode of Spongebob. doesn’t matter that it’s backwards, it will take the same amount of time

now, I don’t know how many times a bee is shown during the Bee Movie, but from a random Google search it’s about one million. we also don’t know what the cut would be like for “each time a bee is shown”, so let’s also assume that every time a new bee is shown. so, that would mean that the Spongebob series would be played roughly one million times in this small section alone, making the length already up to 19,910 years (I’m converting to years here since it’s easier to work with than hours. the final number does not end up pretty)

now onto the Simpsons part. there are very few words in the English language without vowels, so I’m going to assume that there’s maybe 3 of those per episode. I also have no fucking clue how many words are in the Simpsons series (nor do I care to count them all out) so I grabbed a random episode and did a word count on it. it came to 2574 words (with the 3 eliminated from the above assumption), so multiply it by that how many episodes there are, which is 606, and you get 1,559,844. holy fuck. so now multiply the amount of time the last section took (19,910 years) with the amount of times it needs to cut into this section (1,559,844 times) and you get 31,056,494,040 years

now onto every fucking video from Youtube. so, there are roughly 1.5B videos on Youtube right now with an average time of 15 minutes, which results in 22.5B minutes sick. doing some more math, we get to 135T cuts to make (what the FUCK), which brings us to a total of 418,500,762,669,400,000,000,000 years (I can’t even use a calculator for this shit anymore, I have to cut off zeros then add them later after multiplying shit by hand)

now onto Toy Story trilogy. this trilogy is 4 hours, 39 minutes. let’s assume the color green is in 90% of this film (thanks Buzz!) and now you have 15,066 cuts. now, multiplying this all together (done by hand because it’s so huge), and you get 25,137,632,490,377,180,400,000,000,000 years

finally, onto the Ice Age pentology. so, there’s 5 movies in this thing. and I found all the scripts for them. and I found a site that counts syllables. so this one will be accurate. and that count is 37,773 syllables. so, for this final supercut, the length reaches 960,623,792,059,017,235,249,200,000,000,000 years, or 960.6 novemdecillion years

so if scientists somehow figure out how you can live forever, some of you guys might have some fun with this video if it ever gets made

No matter how long it’s been or how many times I’ve watched it, Will saying the words ‘Did you just smell me?’ in that sort of teasing disbelief that Doctor Lecter just-fucking-sniffed-him plus Hannibal’s genuine awkwardness as he tries in vain to excuse himself, will always make the clouds part, the sun come out, flowers bloom, and put a big goofy grin on my face.

the foxhole court gothic
  • there are people on the roof. they are making out. when aren’t they.
  • there’s this guy at your school. you swear his eyes were brown last week. were they ever blue before? it doesn’t matter. oh look, they’re brown again.
  • you hear rumours about a terrifying man. the terrifying man is actually five feet tall. somehow, you’re still scared.
  • there’s two of the man now. maybe three? four? you wonder how many you’ve missed.
  • you watch a match. there’s girls kissing. in your home team, there’s three men with a boyfriend. you wonder if everyone who does sports is gay. this might be the time to get closer to the athletes.
  • the athletes have disappeared. do they even attend school?
  • it is game night. the athletes are still gone. suddenly, the athletes are on the field. of course they are. it is game night.
  • you turn on the tv. there is a game on. you turn the tv off. there is a different game playing. you turn it on. yet another game. it must be the athletes.
  • the cheerleaders are practising. you turn around. they’re in front of you. you wonder how many there are. it’s never the same cheerleaders.
  • you have only ever talked to 10 people in your entire school. it’s okay. it’s like that for everyone.
  • you’re not sure how long you’ve been a student. you think it’s five years. you look at the calendar. wrong. it’s been 3 days. maybe you should take a nap.
EXO Reaction to their Pregnant Girlfriend's  German Shepherd Being Protective of Her.

Xiumin

“Why are you even barking?… She’s mine”.

Originally posted by secrethideoutme

Luhan

“Good job Y/D/N, Keep protecting our girl”.

Originally posted by meiren-menglu

Kris

*Starts to get a little annoyed*

“This was cute, now I can’t even touch you without getting barked at”.  

Originally posted by yourejustmystylee

Suho

“HERE WE GO AGAIN!”

Originally posted by yehet-a-kookie

Lay

*Finds it the cutest thing*

“Good girl.”

Originally posted by fvck-kai

Baekhyun

“That’s right doggy, I have your girl now.”

*Watches the dog as he leans in to kiss you with a smirk*

Originally posted by glorious-soobooty

Chen

*Cuddles for both you and the dog*

Originally posted by dayafterdae

Chanyeol

*No matter how many times, he would still jump every time your dog barked*

“OMG! again!!??”

Originally posted by jongintaesoo

D.O

“This was once so cute, now it’s starting to get on my last nerve.”

Originally posted by dailyexo

Tao

“She’s mine, nice try”

*Cocky*

Originally posted by yourbiaslikesitrough

Kai

*Still finds it cute*

“Did you want some love too?”

Originally posted by dazzlingkai

Sehun

“Y/N he’s doing it again!”

*Another upset puppy*

Originally posted by r-velvets

-Jewels

A skeptical shipper no longer

Okay, I’ve watched the “I love you” scene about 30 times now, and no matter how many times I watch it, that second ‘I love you’ is genuine. It’s filled with emotion and realization on his part, no doubt about it. 

Sometimes after rewatching scenes many times over I start seeing little inconsistencies and tend to view them with a more critical eye, shipper goggles off I mean, (if you’ve followed me for a long time in this fandom, you should know I’ve always been a skeptic, examples: this short HLV meta and this long-ass TEH meta)… but this one… I found no fault in it. No hidden layers. No maybe’s or but’s… It was real.

In that moment, Sherlock realized his words were as true as hers. 

That’s why he said it twice.

That’s why Molly reacted the way she did… she can see through his bullshit, remember? Heck, I will bet you anything that’s why she asked him to say it in the first place, because she knew those feelings were inside him, buried deep, and fuck if she was gonna be the only one to spill her heart out. 

That’s why I fucking love this woman. She is one of the strongest people I’ve ever seen, and I am so filled with respect for her. Molly Hooper is someone I will never forget and who has left a definitive mark on my heart. 

Sherlolly may not be 100% confirmed… but at least their feelings are. Now it’s just a matter of time. 

I cried watching Moana

And I would probably cry again no matter how many times I watch it.

It’s the final scene with Te Ka that gets me. You know how it goes. Moana looks at Te Ka across the ocean, realizes the truth, and lets Te Ka come to her. She sings as she walks onwards to fulfill her destiny as Moana of Motunui. There’s a chorus reminiscent of the previous scene with her Grandma and that is powerful on itself.

But then Moana says they have stolen the heart from inside you. And you see Te Ka rushing towards her with so much anger, desperation, there’s something in the way Te Ka moves, along with this line of the song, that speaks to me on a personal level. Something that makes the broken parts of myself that I’d hidden away so long away resonate. I watched as Te Ka kept going and I felt the knot on my throat.

I might have been able to hold on.

And then; but this does not define you

I cried. I cried during the rest of the scene and I couldn’t stop crying and it was somewhere in between cathartic and terrifying, but it was good. It felt so good.

Because Te Fiti stops. As if this entire time she had allowed an external perception of herself to define who she was. Like the pain and sorrow and fear and anger of losing her heart had swallowed her whole leaving nothing but ashes and anger behind, until in that moment, Moana, with her understanding and forgiveness and acceptance, lets Te Fiti see beyond it.

This is not who you are.
You know who you are.

I cried.

Because it might not have even been their intention, but as someone who has struggled with anger and terror and something terrible inside of me due to the actions of others, as someone who was shaped by someone else’s actions, that scene was one of the most powerful things I’ve seen in a long time.

I didn’t even know I needed it. I cried and smiled, and when Te Fiti appeared again in all her marvelous glory, it was like seeing hope in front of me.

I don’t know. It was a very poignant song for me, and I needed to let it out somewhere.

A list of what survives in Les Mis

1. Marius (a small bean but an important one)

2. Cosette (good;she is pure)

3 The Thénardiers(gross)

4 the sewers(gross but needed?) 

5. the monarchy(🚫🆓 ew)

6. the underlying feeling that the voice of the people can be beautiful and loud and courageous but in the end will always be stomped on by ppl with the most power and the most money. you can watch les mis a thousand times but enjolras will always die and now matter how many times  you will it to change, the schoolboys always end up dead on the streets** 

7. love

8. the candlesticks (yes. beauty, grace, class, integrity, life changing)

9. probably that handsome soldier™ 

**except Marius, see number 1

In The Name Of Love

Characters - Bucky x Reader, Steve

Word Count - 1,013

Warnings - Language, Mentions of sex, Fluff, Self Loathing, Reader being an asshole

A/N - Idk where this came from but I hope you guys like it. Feedback is always welcome.

“This is only gonna hurt in the long run,” you huffed out a heavy breath, gathering yourself as you rolled off of Bucky’s sweat-soaked sheets.

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8

The Descent into Fandom Hell

We all have this moment, when we realize we’re neck deep into a new fandom or ship or something similar. Usually, you can pinpoint the blame at one or two people, either a friend or someone you follow on social media for DRAGGING you into HELL with them!

No matter how many clouds gather and no matter how dark they might get, the blue sky is always there, behind them, just waiting to be seen. You cannot stop the clouds from coming, nor move the ones already there, nor seek to hurry them along: they will clear in their own time. All you can do is watch them; without attachment to any particular cloud, without labelling them good or bad, until eventually they part and you see the blue sky behind them. However, if you fix your gaze upon the darkest cloud and follow it, you might come to think the whole sky is dark and so miss the blue where it is revealed.
    It is the same with your thoughts: though they might be many and some might be darker than others, your inner peace is always there, behind them, just waiting to be seen. So long as you just watch them, without attachment, without labelling them, eventually they will pass and you will experience the stillness of inner peace. It is only with attachment to thought that you might think the mind contains nothing but incessant thoughts; and so you come to forget that inner peace is there, just beneath them.
    Just watch your thoughts, without identifying with them: you’d never watch the clouds and think that you are one, so why would you think that you’re a thought? Watch your thoughts and look for the stillness behind them: it is in that stillness that you will find your inner peace.
    Look for the blue.
—  Dave J Watson

“For the longest time, I HATED “Frozen” and everything about it. But, when my niece first watched it she fell in love.Every time she’s over now she has to watch it, no matter how many times it ends up playing. You would think I would hate it more but, honestly, I don’t. Now, whenever I see something “Frozen” related, it reminds me of her. I even sang “Do You Wanna Build a Snowman” to her just to watch her get the biggest grin on her little face. My love for her overshadowed my hate for the movie.”

- When I first started my studyblr I thought I was invincible.  I thought that I would be the queen of aesthetically pleasing notes and masterposts.  But, failure is inevitable.  Even the people that appear to have every aspect of their life together will occasionally fail.  But how will we ever learn to grow without having learnt what starting from the bottom feels like? -

DISTRACTIONS

  • Listen to music- Your favorite songs that you know all the words to or even some new music to keep your mind engaged
  • Read a book- Books serve as great tools to bring your mind into another world
  • Hang out with a friend- If you live a very social life, call a friend and go out for lunch or just to hangout to get your mind off things for a little bit before you’re ready to make peace with failure
  • Watch your favorite TV show- I definitely recommend watching friends as a light hearted option

ACCEPTING FAILURE

  • Allow yourself to grieve- failure is hard no matter how many times you encounter it.  Let yourself feel what you need to feel in order to make peace with it.
  • Give yourself time- You don’t have to go right back into life with a big smile.  Take a day or however much time you need in order to feel like yourself again. 
  • Talk about it- Sometimes talking about it is the best remedy.  Friends or family that are willing to listen and understand can be great people to talk to.  Sometimes in the midst of talking about your failure you can find solutions.

MAKE PEACE WITH FAILURE

  • Understand what caused the failure- was it a lack of studying? Was it a really stressful week where everything seemed impossible? Were there personal issues that were more important at the time?
  • Separate yourself from it-  YOU are not a failure.  Just because it didn’t work this time doesn’t mean it will not work next time.  Things take time, don’t blame yourself.
  • Make goals for the future- Tell yourself how you’re going to fix this issue and stick to your goals even when life gets tough.

My Other “How-To” Posts

Quietus - Chapter 2

Sequel to Missing - a 707 x MC fan fiction


You woke up to a dark room, with the light coming from the computer screen as the sole source of light. Brushing sleep away from your eyes, you notice that Saeyoung is not at his usual spot.  You sat up on the bed, but found that you had no strength to actually get out of it.  

Sitting in the darkness, your eyes settle on the faint glow of the PC screen.  The times that you are left alone has been very rare nowadays; Saeyoung has been watching over you like a hawk, and Saeran always seemed to show up in the corner of the room when you least expect it.  There also has been a steady amount of gifts, calls and visits from other RFA members.  No matter how many times you tell them that you are fine, they can somehow see through everything.

And you hate it.

You hate being this weak.  You hate that you have somehow become a burden to everybody, and you can’t understand how you’re just so goddamn scared.  You barely leave the house alone, and the black 9mm that Saeyoung gave you somehow became your security blanket. You would keep it under your pillow at night, and the pain in Saeyoung’s eyes when he finds it does not escape you.

Saeyoung…he has been nothing but an angel.  You clutch at the blankets on your lap. You try so hard to be happy for him, to make him stop worrying…and you know he’s been losing sleep for God knows how long because you would still have these night terrors like a goddamn child.

This is not good enough.  I need to try harder.

You will yourself to get out of the bed and make an effort to at least fold the blanket neatly.  You glanced at the computer screen as you walked towards the door, and you notice something loading.  You leave the computer alone like you always do, then opened the door of your room.  

It’s bright outside; the lights in the hallway were turned on.  You allowed your eyes to adjust to the sudden brightness and you notice that the house is quiet.  

The brothers going out in the middle of the night no longer surprises you, so you made your way past Saeran’s room and went downstairs to fix something to eat.  Glancing at the window towards the garage, you did notice that one of Saeyoung’s cars was not parked, so you shrugged it off and continued towards the kitchen.

Rummaging through the fridge, you found yourself some microwaveable food.  You know that you really should cook real food, but it just feels like too much effort at the moment. Popping the container in the microwave and setting the timer, you stand and wait.

Then you hear the steady downpour of rain.  Confused, you checked your phone for today’s weather, and it appears that the temperature had gone up considerably, hence there was no snow.

After consuming your meal you checked the garage if the boys are back, but there is no sign of the car yet. Noticing the sleet seeping through the garage door, you assumed that it was raining pretty badly and your boys might just get delayed a bit more.  A part of you was worried if they had something to protect them from the rain and cold.

Sighing, you made your way up the stairs, when you heard a rattling noise.  You felt the sense of dread as you might actually know where the sound is coming from.  Saeran always keeps his windows open as he always likes being able to look at the sky while he works, and since it was considerably warmer today he may have opened the window and forgot about it.  You had a sinking feeling that his computer might be drenched.

Rushing towards his room, you open the door to see that the computer was still safe, but there is a small puddle on the floor.  You groan and immediately shut the window, but the puddle on the floor made you slip, and you instinctively grabbed onto the table, pressing some buttons on the keyboard by accident.  The screen flashed a bit, but you paid it no heed as you are too busy trying to still your heartbeat.

“Phew, that was close,” you whispered to yourself.  You stood up and carefully avoided any more wet spots, and grabbed the door mat placed just outside of Saeran’s bathroom.  You carefully placed the mat on the puddle on the floor to have it absorb the water for a while.

This is when you notice a picture on Saeran’s computer screen.  It looked like an old newspaper clipping.  Curious, you leaned over and read.

You felt your blood freeze, as if someone has doused ice over your entire body.  

“W…what is this..?”


National Intelligence Service – ID records for (MC)

Birth date: 1997/MM/DD

Gender: Female

Status: DECEASED

Cause  of death: Vehicular accident

Date  of death: 1999/06/21

 

The Korea Times

21 June 1999 - FAMILY OF THREE – KILLED IN HIGHWAY CRASH

SEOUL – Victims identified as (Father’s  name), ___ years old, and (Mother’s name), ___ years old, along with their  2-year-old daughter, (MC’s name) were declared dead on arrival in Downtown General Hospital at 7:27 this morning due to injuries sustained from a  multi-vehicle collision near Exit 24. 

———————

It was quite unusual to rain in winter, but since they were graced with higher temperatures today, the streets below Jumin’s penthouse suite was covered in sleet, and very few people and cars dare to venture out in fear of the roads being too slippery.

Instead of the usual wine glass, Jumin held a steaming cup of coffee.  He glances at the pile of paperwork still on his desk at this hour, and he finds himself lost in thoughts.

The story of your past reminds him of an old—a very old—story from more than a decade ago. Somehow, he wants to just dismiss the idea, but a bigger part of him wants to confirm if his memory fits.

His phone’s ring tone interrupted his thoughts. Sighing, he walked over to his desk and saw Jaehee’s name on the screen. Grabbing his phone with his free hand, he taps on the green “accept” button and places the phone on his ear.

“It’s me.  What is it?”

“Mr. Han,” Jaehee spoke. “You have a package.”

Jumin’s eyebrows knot in confusion.  A package?  At this hour?

“Mr. Han..?”

He places his coffee on the desk, and runs his fingers through his hair.  “Who’s it from?”

“I…I can’t tell…”

A bad feeling started creeping from his stomach.  He closed his eyes and cleared his thoughts; he could clearly sense the difference in Jaehee’s tone.

“Jaehee.  Where are you?”

“I’m…at the entrance of the building.”

It is very obvious that Jaehee sounded flustered.  The nagging feeling was constantly eating at him.

“Get inside the building immediately and wait in the lobby. I will have the bodyguards get you.”

———————

“Aww man!” Saeyoung groaned, staring at the rain as he and his brother stepped out of the convenience store.  Sighing, he placed the grocery bags back on the cart.

Saeran stepped out after him, quietly nibbling at a lollipop.  He expressed his distaste of the weather right after he notices that the ground before him was practically slush, scowling at the night sky.

“Well,” Saeyoung turned to his brother, “I guess we need to wait this out a bit.”

Suddenly, Saeyoung’s phone started vibrating from his pocket, which made him jump a little. Saeran curiously watched his brother fish for the phone, and looked at him in question.

“Huh, it’s Jumin,” Saeyoung muttered before picking up. “What’s up, trust fund kid?”

“C&R Building. Penthouse. Now.”

Beep.

Saeyoung stared at his phone for a while; confusion painted on his face.  “What the hell?”

“What did he say?” Saeran inquired.

“C&R Building. Penthouse. Now,” Saeyoung replied, using his best imitation of Jumin’s voice.  “That spoiled brat, I’m not his assistant!”

Saeran’s eyes darkened. “Emergency.”

Saeyoung sighed, placing the phone back in his pocket and taking the grocery bags from the cart.  “Seems so.”

They groan in unison as they carefully waddled their way through slush.

———————

A/N:  Oh goodness I have been so damn busy for the past few days T_T work is just never ending; I’m not even done with one I get another one, and another one, and another one…

Save me T_T

Hopefully I will be able to write in peace when the week ends!

Chapter 1 here!

Chapter 3 is up!

As the new administration takes power, I want to make a suggestion regarding how we (myself included) should consume news media. 

It’s simple. Every time Donald Trump stirs up a media firestorm by using Twitter to lambast celebrities, pick fights with other politicians, and answer callouts (no matter how seemingly valid or incendiary), I want you to go and look at the following, using as many unbiased (or near enough) and varied news sources as you can get your hands on. (I would personally suggest Associated Press, BBC, NPR, and CSPAN)  

-Look at what Congress has done and will do in the 48 hours surrounding that tweet, and the resulting media feeding frenzy.

-Also look at what the president himself is doing. Executive orders. Meetings. Nominations.

-If the Supreme Court is in session, watch them as well.

Basically what I’m telling you is that every time Donald Trump opens Twitter to vomit into the internet, you should hawk the government for a couple of days. I guarantee you, whatever they’re doing while the media is focused on “OMG can you believe ect ect”, is more worthy of your attention than a Twitter flame war, because the long and the short of it is this simple truth:

The politicians don’t want you paying attention.

This sort of diversion is not a new tactic. Politicians of every stripe have been doing this as long as the idea of politics has existed. It’s as old as the disappearing coin trick, because basically it is one. “Look over here! Look where there’s vivid but completely vapid conflict! You won’t notice that I’m palming your healthcare, civil rights, and public services right out from under you.” 

The difference now is that a political party has never ever had such a fertile ground for creating hollow scandal on command, nor have they had such an expeditious means of spreading it. With Trump in the White House, they can pretty much pre-order a media circus to spin up whenever they’d like.

So listen, friends. Don’t fall for their game. Pay attention to what matters. Don’t let them enrage you with things that ultimately are window dressing fluff. Save your attention and rage for fighting for what is important.   

Drip Drop (M) | Taemin

Because this comeback has given me lots of feels

//do it fast, do it slow, you control the tempo

The club by the beach was drowning in deep house music; bodies were moving sensuously against each other in rhythm, and mouths were open in invitation for tequila and rum. You were intoxicated, and alcohol played no part in it.

The both of you had been goofing off, attempting to dance the waltz to the club music, when Taemin was whisked away by a man itching for a dance battle. Little did the guy know that he was in for a losing game. Cheers erupted from all around you as Taemin took off his baseball cap, feet moving swiftly across the floor as he turned slave to the rhythm. You smirked from the bar counter, taking in a sip of your fresh jug of beer. It didn’t matter how many times you watched him dance, his moves would always turn you on. Taemin showed no signs of slowing down, his hips thrusting and body rolling. The screams got deafening as he teased the crowd with a flash of his six-pack, ending his solo with a fist pump to the air.

It didn’t take long for the space that had formed around the two dancers to disappear as the crowd pushed the loser aside, all ready to shower admiration over Taemin, the undisputed winner of the battle. Girls clad in skin-tight dresses that barely draped over their butts were fondling over him, running their fingers along his nape, touching his abs through the fabric of his black tee. Unfortunately for them, his eyes were already set in your direction and he pulled himself away before they could say “sleep with me”.

“Hey,” he called out, breath slightly hitched.

“Hey to you too,” you greeted him with a kiss, and when you broke apart you could see the smirk that dared other guys in the club to be jealous. He wrapped an arm around your waist, gestured for a share of your beer and chugged a good quarter of it down.

“Did you see me out there?” he said devilishly, his tongue gracing the lower half of his fleshy lips.

“I always see you, Tae,” you slipped your hand into the back pocket of his black jeans, rubbing the tip of your nose against his and like always, it elicited a chuckle.

“Come on,” he grabbed your hand and nodded towards the exit, “let’s get out of here.”

With your hand in his, Taemin guided you out the club. The lanterns that hung down from the poles lit up the pebbled path with their orangey glow, the flowery shrubs by either side of you adding to the mystique and romantic vibes of the villa.

“Fancy a dip?” asked Taemin as he fumbled around in his pockets to find the key card to the bungalow.

“Sure, I think there’s guacamole,” you said with the straightest face, and the look of exasperation on Taemin’s face had you bursting out in laughter as you walked past him to open the door once he found the key card.

“Yeah, you laugh now, I’m going to have you screaming later.” Taemin stated as he closed the door and you turned around, laughter gone and tension present. “I saw the way you were looking at me in the club.” He took off his khaki jacket almost too slowly, knowing that the sight of his muscles rippling underneath his t-shirt would make you weak.

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