no justification or excuse

gercan -- so i keep you in my mind

Gilbert calls right as Ludwig is measuring out detergent. It’s not a task that needs his full attention, much to his despair, so Ludwig cannot, in good conscience, simply ignore Gilbert’s call. Moreover, he can’t fully sink into his task of laundry knowing Gilbert is calling him. Not just because Gilbert will leave him voicemail after voicemail listing, in great detail, the number of sacrifices he made for Ludwig (“You’re my nation-state and baby brother,” Gilbert reminds him frequently, in a tone of voice that Ludwig secretly thinks all the former empires perfected during one of their knitting circles. It’s not as though Gilbert does that often–because he associates that kind of behavior–“uncool weak shit, Ludwig”–with Roderich or Arthur or Francis. But he’s not above it, and he has used that beleaguered self-sacrificing older brother act on Ludwig for things like not responding quickly enough to calls and/or texts or not drinking the next next round of drinks that Gilbert decided to get on a Tuesday), but also because–

“Damn it,” Ludwig sighs, looking at the detergent dribbling steadily over the rim of the little plastic cup onto his fingers. He pours some back, pours the rest in the machine, wipes his fingers on one of the sheet corners in the machine, puts down the detergent tub, and then winces because his cell phone starts ringing again.

–because Gilbert will just keep calling.  

And there’s a little notification that tells him that his brother has also left a message.

He answers. “This is a bad time,” Ludwig says, “I’m doing laundry.”

“It’s not Sunday,” comes his brother’s response. Gilbert doesn’t laugh, but his voice does kick a little higher as he teases. “First you go out with the North Americans on a weeknight, now you’re doing laundry on a Thursday–”

Ludwig sighs and turns the washing machine on. Leaning against it, he’s torn between hanging up on Gilbert or just hiding out in his kitchen and rearranging his pantry until he has to arrive at today’s afternoon session.

“And what are you doing up this early?” Gilbert sounds downright gleeful. “Did you just not go to bed? Are you still drunk? Tell me everything, Luddy. Did you help Canada steal another stop sign?”

“I made him put it back.”

“Look, Ludwig. I always encouraged you to be a leader. But sometimes you have to be a follower. Like when you don’t have any friends. When you don’t have any friends–”

“I have friends–”

“Three of them are dogs, and they’re with me in our ancestral home.” Ludwig starts rearranging his pantry and chooses not to have Gilbert elaborate because their ancestral home changes on Gilbert’s mood. Sometimes it’s a cottage, sometimes it’s a park, sometimes it’s a bar. It occurs to him, unfortunately, only later, that maybe Ludwig should have changed the subject and asked just where Gilbert was just to avoid this entire conversation and–

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In wondering why Americans are afraid of dragons, I began to realize that a great many Americans are not only anti-fantasy, but altogether anti-fiction. We tend, as a people, to look upon all works of the imagination either as suspect or as contemptible.

‘My wife reads novels. I haven’t got the time.’
‘I used to read that science fiction stuff when I was a teenager, but of course I don’t now.’
'Fairy stories are for kids. I live in the real world.’

Who speaks so? Who is it that dismisses 'War and Peace,’ 'The Time Machine,’ and 'A Midsummer Night’s Dream’ with this perfect self-assurance? It is, I fear, the man in the street – the men who run this country.

Such a rejection of the entire art of fiction is related to several American characteristics: our Puritanism, our work ethic, our profit-mindedness, and even our sexual mores.

To read 'War and Peace’ or 'The Lord of the Rings’ plainly is not 'work’ – you do it for pleasure. And if it cannot be justified as 'educational’ or as 'self-improvement,’ then, in the Puritan value system, it can only be self-indulgence or escapism. For pleasure is not a value, to the Puritan; on the contrary, it is a sin.

Equally, in the businessman’s value system, if an act does not bring in an immediate, tangible profit, it has no justification at all. Thus the only person who has an excuse to read Tolstoy or Tolkien is the English teacher, who gets paid for it. But our businessman might allow himself to read a best-seller now and then: not because it is a good book, but because it is a best-seller – it is a success, it has made money. To the strangely mystical mind of the money-changer, this justifies its existence; and by reading it he may participate, a little, in the power and mana of its success. If this is not magic, by the way, I don’t know what it is.

The last element, the sexual one, is more complex. I hope I will not be understood as being sexist if I say that, within our culture, I believe that this anti-fiction attitude is basically a male one. The American boy and man is very commonly forced to define his maleness by rejecting certain traits, certain human gifts and potentialities, which our culture defines as 'womanish’ or 'childish.’ And one of these traits or potentialities is, in cold sober fact, the absolutely essential human faculty of imagination…

But I must narrow the definition to fit our present subject. By 'imagination,’ then, I personally mean the free play of the mind, both intellectual and sensory. By 'play’ I mean recreation, re-creation, the recombination of what is known into what is new. By 'free’ I mean that the action is done without an immediate object of profit – spontaneously. That does not mean, however, that there may not be a purpose behind the free play of the mind, a goal; and the goal may be a very serious object indeed. Children’s imaginative play is clearly a practicing at the acts and emotions of adulthood; a child who did not play would not become mature. As for the free play of an adult mind, its result may be 'War and Peace,’ or the theory of relativity.

To be free, after all, is not to be undisciplined. I should say that the discipline of the imagination may in fact be the essential method or technique of both art and science. It is our Puritanism, insisting that discipline means repression or punishment, which confuses the subject. To discipline something, in the proper sense of the word, does not mean to repress it, but to train it – to encourage it to grow, and act, and be fruitful, whether it is a peach tree or a human mind.

I think that a great many American men have been taught just the opposite. They have learned to repress their imagination, to reject it as something childish or effeminate, unprofitable, and probably sinful.

They have learned to fear it. But they have never learned to discipline it at all.

—  Ursula K. Le Guin, from Why Are Americans Afraid of Dragons? (1974)
Why Are We Still Hurting Dogs?
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This is very unlike me, but I need to vent.

I was browsing Instagram and came across a picture of an adorable, fat-faced pit bull (not pictured). “Oh! How cute. But what’s all of that…”

I enlarged the photo to see a dog wearing a flat collar, a shock collar, and a prong collar (leash clipped to the prong). I notice who posted the picture… a local well-known dog trainer who is extremely outspoken regarding his use of and promotion of punishment-based training methods.

The dog was available for adoption. He was labeled as trained, dog and kid friendly, and food motivated.

So I’m over here, desperately struggling to understand… WHY are these devices necessary?!

Did the dog jump on or bite at people? That can be corrected without pain.

Did the dog steal food from the garbage or off the counters? That can be corrected without pain.

Did the dog react violently towards dogs, skateboarders, or any other stimuli while on leash? That can be corrected without pain.

Did the dog growl or bite when removed from the couch? That can be corrected without pain.

Seriously. All of it. And way, way more. If we can train a hyena to present itself for a voluntary blood draw, a whale to pee in a cup, or an African wild dog to “smile” for tooth brushing without painful training methods, there is simply no comprehensible reason that these methods will not work for your pet. Force-free / humane / positive / progressive (whatever you care to call them) training methods DO work, and proof is plainly available for those who care to see it.

It’s at about this point that I frequently hear, ‘well, if you don’t like punishment-based methods, don’t use them. They’ve always worked for my dog’.


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It’s really not that simple. For starters, I often need to fix dogs that are emotionally crippled by punishment-based trainers. Additionally, this attitude perpetuates the belief that when it comes to dog training, “there’s no one right way”. Or that “different methods work for different people”. To an extent, that’s absolutely true. But when you motivate a dog with an electric shock and I motivate a dog with a piece of dehydrated liver, my way of training isn’t different. It’s better.

When your idea of behavior modification is setting a dog up to fail and then holding it on it’s side until it can hardly breathe, but mine is setting a dog up for success and rewarding it for appropriate behavior, my way of training isn’t different. It’s better.

When your training practices rely on thoughts, theories and beliefs which have been debunked by decades worth of behavioral and ethological research, but my mine are the result of over a decade’s worth of strategic research based upon the most up-to-date scientific data available, my way isn’t different. It’s better.

And to those who believe that humane methods are fine for 'soft’ dogs and puppies, but that these tools are necessary for “extreme” cases (animal killers, “red zone dogs”, whatever)… join the club. That’s what I thought, too. Now I understand how preposterously backwards that line of thinking is. If you have to tell a dog “hey, don’t attack that thing – or else!”, you are essentially walking a loaded weapon around and hoping that the safety is on. Prong and shock collars do not correct aggression in any way… they suppress it. This is why so many punishment-based trainers view themselves as being the last option for dogs. If punishment doesn’t work, it is made more extreme until the dog: a) submits to a state of learned helplessness and gives up, or b) refuses to stop fighting for its life (or, in other words, stops 'acting aggressively’). It is at this point that many trainers will deem a dog beyond help and suggest euthanasia.

Yes, humane training methods work for aggressive dogs. If you don’t believe me, at least listen to Jim Crosby. Jim is the only expert in the world who routinely consults with dogs who have killed human beings. He does his consultations in neck-to-ankle Kevlar. He is a leading authority on extremely aggressive dogs, and he is also a staunch supporter of force-free training.

“Unwarranted aggression is an undesirable behavior pattern that needs to be redirected. Redirection can definitely be accomplished by using praise and cookies. I do it every day. Interrupt the unwanted behavior-before it becomes an avalanche-and redirect the behavior to an incompatible behavior. Reinforce (with praise, cookies, etc). Rinse and repeat.”

He isn’t the only one who does it, folks. The American Veterinary Society of Animal Behavior, the International Association of Animal Behavior Consultants, the Certification Council for Professional Dog Trainers, and many more organizations are filled with thousands of people – applied animal behaviorists, veterinary behaviorists, certified professional dog trainers and beyond – who treat aggressive dogs without the use of shock or prong collars (or anything else designed to cause pain or fear). If they can successfully change the behavior of pet dogs without utilizing methods that are painful or frightening, why can’t anyone else?

The fact is: anyone can. I do not know why some people cling to certain concepts with unrelenting persistence. I suspect that it has a lot to do with ego, and a refusal to admit that there may be a better way than what they already know. But seriously… enough is enough. We know better. Start doing better.


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We bring these animals into our homes with full knowledge of their innate drives, desires and follies. We acquire dogs knowing that they may bark at other dogs, or dig in the yard, or discover treasure in the garbage. Yet some people still treat these behaviors and others like them as criminal offenses which need to be punished severely.

Stop. Train your dogs. Meaning, take time out of your day to actually show them what you want from them. Drop the ridiculous expectations. Dogs aren’t psychic, and do not deserve to be hurt because they don’t understand our rules.

To the trainer of the adorable, porky black pit bull who is apparently so out of control as to require three collars (two of which are designed to inflict pain): Send him over to me. That garbage is straight-up unnecessary, and I’ll show you myself if you’re struggling to believe it.

Stop looking for excuses to hurt dogs.

There is no justification.

Spring Day [2]

Summary: Jimin and you were best friends since you were little kids, never leaving each other’s side, but one rainy day of spring you left him, asking him to forget about you. You were trying to protect him from yourself, but he didn’t know that. What will happen if fate got you two back together?

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Genre: Fantasy, Vampires, Angst, Fluff

Warnings: Blood, mentions of death

Word Count: 2.3k       

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4 //Part 5


Turning back into reality, once your sight became normal again you brought yourself up and looked at Namjoon. He was confused by the sudden change in you.

Your face turned and you searched for someone you hoped you didn’t see. But you did. Your jaw clenched as you observed him talking with another guy, wearing his suit. You suddenly wanted to hug him; you wanted to say everything you couldn’t say that spring day under the rain, but the only thing you managed to say was:

“Jimin”


“Do you know him?” Namjoon asked tilting his head as he changed position to put the box on the table next to him.

“What do you mean? Do you know him?” You turned your head again, conscious of the sweat forming in your palms every second that you stayed there knowing that Jimin was only some meters away from you. Plus the scent still got your head spinning.

Namjoon laughed, too loud for your liking, you didn’t want any attention drawn to you, and especially not his attention. “Why wouldn’t I know the president of the company I work for? Are you crazy?”

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The Love We Think We Deserve

melconnor2007: Hi I was wondering if you could do a story where Bucky and the reader been dating, but nat refuses to believe he loves here and makes a move on Bucky, the reader sees, but runs away before she sees Bucky pushing nat off, the reader then leaves the tower with a note for Bucky telling him, but Bucky using his skills tracks her down, with lots of fluff at the end where he explains and tell reader how much he loves her, if that makes any sense at all, lol, thanks

A/N: So this was meant to be a drabble but it ended up being super long, as is customary with me. I added some smut because who doesn’t love Bucky smut? Thanks for the request @melconnor2007 ! This was fun to write! Hope you like it.

Warnings: self-loathing brought on by perceived cheating, low-self esteem issues, sadness, angst, Natasha kinda being a bitch (I actually really love Nat, so this was hard to write) followed by extensive smut (oral - female and male receiving, unprotected sex, fingering) and some fluff. [I think that’s everything, if I missed something, I’m sorry]

Word Count: 4,453 (JFC)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Originally posted by jawlinesandmetalarms


Dating an Avenger came with its fair share of complications.

For one thing, they tended to be away more often than not and considering they were usually risking their life to save the world, their particular brand of “business trip” carried its own kind of anxiety for the people they left behind.

You had been dating Bucky Barnes for a year since Tony’s feud with Steve had finally settled and he’d agreed to let the ex-HYDRA asset move into the Avengers Compound. That particular complication had been uniquely case-specific, you and Steve playing referee for several months after Bucky had moved in, working to keep the two from killing each other over even the most insignificant disputes. Like Tony accusing Bucky of putting coffee grounds down the garbage disposal. Or Bucky leaving disassembled weapons in weird places around the compound—like Tony’s lab or inside his expensive sports cars.  

Despite the occupational hazards of being in love with Tony Stark’s least favorite super soldier, dating Bucky had some pretty unbelievable perks. Like, the way he called you ‘doll’ when he asked you for something or the way he smirked when his hands found your thighs beneath the dinner table and made you jump in surprise as he walked them slowly up your skirt. He liked to take you on motorcycle rides into the empty fields that surrounded the compound for miles, all land that Tony owned. He wasn’t fond of being out amongst crowds of people, even though he’d been officially pardoned for his crimes as the Winter Soldier after Tony had welcomed Steve back into the fold. He did have a fondness for dark movie theaters and you had no complaints.

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may my Islam never make me so arrogant that I allow myself to treat people like shit and find excuses/justification/affirmations in the religion for doing so, ameen. 

unfriendly reminder that fiction does not exist in a vacuum. stop supporting things that hurt trans folk & abuse survivors just because they’re fictional and then act surprised when we’re upset about it. it hurts us by existing, and it hurts even if we try to ignore it. there is no excuse, no justification for actively engaging in transphobia and perpetuating abusive stereotypes, and that’s exactly what you’re doing.

fiction does not exist in a vacuum. you are not an exception just because you say you wouldn’t support those things in real life. this IS real life, we are being hurt IN real life, stop. just fucking stop.

anonymous asked:

Ok, so Bellamy says "You floated my mother" and thats meant to be a you as in specifically Kane? Or you as in all of you, members of the council?

I think it was meant to be him. Kane. As in Kane was the one in charge of the execution, as he was head of the guard. 

Kane was probably in charge of most, if not all of the executions. Remember who Kane was in season 1. He followed the law. The law said floating was the just punishment for crimes. He did what was best for his people ACCORDING TO LAW.

I think in a way, Bellamy’s conversation with Kane here was very similar to his scene with Jaha in The Four Horsemen. In both scenes, the older men were trying to impart wisdom that justified Bellamy’s actions and told him he was doing the right thing when he thought it was the wrong thing. 

In both scenes, he called them on their own past actions where they used those justifications to excuse their OWN sins towards the people. With Jaha, he was a lot more snarky and dramatic. With Kane, who he cares more about and is closer to, he knew the exact right phrase to call him to account and twist the knife. I’m guessing it’s something he’s been holding onto for a while. 

My understanding about that scene has changed as people have been discussing it. His repetition of “You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved” shows a change. It’s no longer about saving lives. It is now about salvation. He’s admitted his sins and he does not believe they can be redeemed. But he’s still going to do what he needs to save as many people as he can, regardless of whether he’s “going to hell” or not. 

When I was a child, I once remember thinking:

“Oh, I’m glad I’m a girl! Boys have it so easy, so made. They already know they could be anything, no one tells them they can’t. That’s too simple. I like a challenge!”

I can’t have been over 10 years old, but already I knew the game was rigged against me. I had already realized that people didn’t expect anything from me besides being good wife material. Sports? Math? Science? Politics? Nah, I knew if I did those things everyone would be surprised. No one sees a little girl and expects greatness from her.

This thought of mine, which I distinctly remember having for some reason –one of those oddly crystal clear childhood memories we keep some times– was only my way of finding a positive out look to a situation beyond my control. Life doesn’t have a “pick a player” setting. Life doesn’t let you pick the level of difficulty you want to play at. You’re served one story mode and you’re screwed.

So that’s part of what feminism is to me. Because, yeah, maybe I like a challenge. And you know which one I pick: I’m going to change the rules of the game.

Because the day I have a daughter (if I ever do have one) I want her thought to be: “I’m so glad I’m a girl!” Period. That’s it. No positive outlook. No justification needed. No excuses to make to the world for being who she is and wanting what she wants.

Listen. Listen. The “asexuality=TMI” thing is so blatantly vile and harmful I can not actually believe exclusionists overall spout and support it to this day, after we’ve been calling it out for months and months, and continue to be absolutely horrible to aces/aros/ppl defending us speaking up against it.

They act like there is literally no difference between broadly referencing sexual attraction (and not all aces even use the split attraction model) and revealing graphic details about one’s sex life. And as though it’s not horrendously sexualizing to claim this about our identities. They also act like talking about “one’s sex life” (which asexuality does not say anything about) is never appropriate unless it’s with a partner™, which is toxic as hell all on its own, but I guess sex-shaming is only bad when other people do it, same as with sexualizing people.

They will also do this shit to aros with a slightly different spin or by simply ignoring the conversation was about both asexuality and aromanticism.

Exclusionists have such huge double standards. They will let nearly anything slide and make up excuses and justifications for it as long as they can use it as a weapon against aces and aros. They only care about people who agree with their stance.

Like literally the “TMI” thing is such blatant toxic crap, just as a lot of other stuff in this mess, and that exclusionists overall have just completely gone along with it and will treat like shit anyone who dares to call it out says everything.

Idk how anyone can convince themselves this shit has nothing to do with hating aces and aros. It’s not “discourse” it’s “haha aces and aros r the worst and should shut up… unless they support us shitting on other aces and aros”

4

Hey!  My name is Daryl Barton, & I’m a friend of Greg Ousley.  To tell you a lil’ more about myself, I’m born and raised in Indianapolis Indiana.  I’m 46 years young, single and never married, and I have one 26 year old daughter and one 3 year old granddaughter.
I’ve been down since 2006 on a drug case (dealing), and without excuse or justification, I take responsibility for my situation.  Actually, I’ve been a “Street-Type” of dude all my life, but incarceration and maturity has changed my mentality, and since I been down I’ve productively used my time trying to better prepare myself for a new path in society by earning my Bachelor’s Degree and completing several self-improvement programs and classes.
Even more, I’ve completed 2 Department of Labor Apprenticeships.  I’m a certified literary braille transcriber through the U.S. Library of Congress and my current job is transcribing textbooks into braille for the Indiana Department of Education, which will afford me an immediate job opportunity with them upon my release.  Speaking of which, I recently received a court date in April 2017 of ra sentence modification, where I very well could be released then.  Meanwhile, I work out regularly, maintaining my health and fitness, and got it tighter (muscular) if I say so myself!  (LOL).  I’m family oriented, I like sports, traveling, music, movies, and a good sense of humor.
I’m a Pisces and a people person, which makes me a good listener and communicator, but most importantly, I’m “real”, not fake nor do I play games.
In general, I’m open to all types of women writing.  A woman in Indiana would be ideal, especially Indianapolis, but certainly not essential.  I hope to hear from you soon.  You can also feel free to email me on jpay.com.
Sincerely, 

Daryl


Daryl Barton #106434, D2-15
Indiana Department of Correction
Indianapolis Re-Entry Educational Facility
401 North Randolph Street
Indianapolis, IN 46201

The self-esteem myth [that an abuser inflicts abuse due to low self esteem] is rewarding for an abuser, because it gets his partner, his therapist, and others to cater to him emotionally. Imagine the privileges an abusive man may acquire: getting his own way most of the time, having his partner bend over backward to keep him happy so he won’t explode, getting to behave as he pleases, and then on top of it all, he gets praise for what a good person he is, and everyone is trying to help him feel better about himself!

Certainly an abuser can be remorseful or ashamed after being cruel or scary to his partner, especially if any outsider has seen what he did. But those feelings are a result of his abusive behavior, not a cause. And as a relationship progresses, the abusive man tends to get more comfortable with his own behavior and the remorse dies out, suffocated under the weight of his justifications. He may get nasty if he doesn’t receive the frequent compliments, reassurance and deference he feels he deserves, but this reaction is not rooted in feelings of inferiority; in fact, the reality is almost the opposite….

—  Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men

anonymous asked:

Hi girl,I love your Errow salt! People say that Laurel's recovery from addiction was too rushed,but I disagree. What's your opinion about that arc?

Hi! Brace yourself, this is probably gonna get long! The real question is: why does that matter?

Laurel’s addiction arc had all of the things it should have. Tommy and Laurel may not have been together when he died, but he died trying to save her, Laurel and Oliver (who had at that point shown signs of rekindling their romance) then decided that they couldn’t in good consciousness date each other whilst Tommy’s loss was so fresh. 

They both felt to blame for what happened to him. Laurel committed herself to Tommy, it was difficult for Laurel to deal with Oliver because she never got closure for what happened between them, they never broke up, he “died” whilst they were still an item, she never got answers from him. Yet, Tommy and Laurel also have history, they comforted each other through the loss of Oliver and feelings blossomed. It was Tommy who doubted that. It was Tommy who was jealous and continually pushed Laurel towards Oliver and was convinced he was second best, despite Laurel wanting the three of them to establish a friendship and Oliver giving them his blessing.

So, Tommy breaks up with Laurel because he doesn’t trust her feelings and is convinced she belongs with Oliver. Oliver then tells Tommy that he needs to man up and let Laurel make her own choices and go after what he wants, but then decides to take his own advice and pursue Laurel himself right under Tommy’s nose. Laurel and Oliver sleep together shortly before Tommy’s sacrifice. It’s fucked up. There is so much blame on all sides here, though Laurel was often manipulated by these two men who allowed their feelings for her to come between their friendship and continuously pushed her away whilst trying to keep her. 

So, both Oliver and Laurel feel to blame for Tommy’s death. Tommy died while on less-than-stellar terms with both of them. Even though Tommy and Laurel were no longer together, Oliver and Laurel still felt that they had betrayed him and decided to stay as friends. Oliver took off and self-isolated to deal with this, whilst throwing himself head-first into his crusade and indulging in violence as a means to cope. Meanwhile, Laurel finds out her sister is still alive and (after Sara fucked Laurel’s boyfriend behind her sister’s back, pretended to be dead for 6 years, tore their family apart because their parents couldn’t deal with her loss, their mother up and left, abandoned Laurel in the process and their father became a controlling alcoholic), Sara pretty much ruined Laurel’s home-life and most of the plans Laurel had made for her future because she fucked her sister’s boyfriend. So, suddenly, Sara is still alive and shows up, and suddenly their mother decides to be in the picture again, Sara doesn’t apologize to Laurel in any significant way and repeats the same behavior by not only fucking Oliver again, but inviting Oliver to a family-only dinner at Laurel’s house to essentially rub Laurel’s nose in it, before the two of them had even begun to build bridges. Oliver blames Laurel. Oliver tells Laurel he no longer has time for her and makes out that her struggles are nothing but a burden to him and accuses her of blaming everyone but herself (which is disgusting af and victim blaming because Laurel actually BLAMED HERSELF for Tommy’s death, that combined with her father’s substance abuse - addiction can be hereditary - it was inevitable that Laurel would start hitting the bottle.)

Laurel was the only person to be suspicious of Sebastian Blood, but her substance abuse had caused people to doubt her judgement and lose her job. No one believed her about Blood despite her being 100% correct. It destroyed her relationships and her credibility.. And because her grief/anger/addiction had caused people to turn their backs on her, she had no support network, which made her addiction worse. She denied it at first, the same as any addict. She tried to make out it wasn’t that big of a deal. It consumed her. Slowly, she started to admit she had a problem, she worked to attend AA meetings and repaired her relationship with her father now that she could understand him a little better, she even apologized to Sara (which will never not piss me off) for being hostile to her. When Sara then died Laurel fought to not go back to that place she was at when Tommy died. She channeled her grief into honoring Sara’s memory.

When Laurel became Black Canary Oliver accused her of chasing a high and doing this for the wrong reasons because she was an addict. He pretty much dismissed her choices and afforded her no agency by basically saying that the only reason she would do that is because she needs her fix and she was hiding behind the mask to avoid her problems. And Laurel rightfully called him the fuck out for that because Oliver had been burying himself in his crusade to avoid his feelings pretty much since the pilot so where the fuck does he get off. So, even in her Black Canary arc, Laurel’s addiction was brought up and the commonalities in these plots were highlighted to tell us “she has learnt/grown and is channeling her grief into something positive/productive this time”.

The addiction arc had everything it needed to: a catalyst, denial, hitting rock bottom, picking herself up, struggling to overcome, being faced with a situation that could trigger relapse but persevering, and then that scene where Laurel pours that full bottle out onto the earth at Sara’s grave when she decides that she’s not that person anymore, and she’ll make her sister proud.

Could it have been longer? Sure. Did it need to be? No. Not really. It was handled well and realistically. There was a definite step-by-step of development that told the tale of a real addiction. Katie’s performance was exceptional, and as someone who has a history of addiction in her family Katie took it seriously, did her research, sat in on AA meetings and fully deserved that PRISM award (making her the only actor on the cast to win an award for performance). It was inspiring and raw and cemented in the real world in a way that no other arc was.

Yet, people always use this “it was rushed” excuse as a means to undermine Laurel/Katie…But like…..it’s such bullshit. Because that arc took all of Season 2 and then was concluded in Season 3 upon her becoming Black Canary. 

Meanwhile, Thea disappears in the last scene of the last episode of Season 2, then appears in episode 2? of Season 3 as a fully-fledged, League-trained martial artist, and it was all tell and no show (the same as Sara’s training, or the vast majority of Roy’s training). 

People say Laurel became Black Canary too quickly and it was unrealistic? HOW? Laurel had been taking self-defense classes her whole life, beat up a couple of thugs to save Tommy and Oliver in one of the first ever episodes of the show, was shown holding her own against criminals in Season 1 and even Season 2 on multiple occasions, then in Season 3 she spent months training with WildCat and Nyssa Al Ghul, but all the haters say her fighting skills “came out of nowhere”. Yet, these people don’t complain about Thea “I’m a sheltered rich girl who’s never thrown a punch in her life” Queen being a master assassin after a few off-screen months of training. I love Thea, I do. I adore her. But the hypocrisy in mindlessly hating Laurel’s arc without acknowledging the plot-holes in Thea’s just makes your hatred for Laurel transparent af. The same could be said about Roy, he was a street criminal who had definitely been in his fair share of street fights, but after one or two scenes of training with Oliver he’s suddenly suited up and he’s Arsenal, yet no one complained that happened too fast. What about all the new recruits in Season 5? Like? 4? 5? of them appeared out of fucking nowhere with limited and varied combat experience yet they’re all suited up with code-names the first time we fucking see them. Felicity was handed a CEO position at a company with absolutely no business experience but there’s no complaints about that being ‘rushed’ or ‘forced’ by Laurel haters? oh, I wonder why! Felicity was romantically linked to 3 superheroes within a year and was emotionally toying with Ray by leading him on/dating him whilst she blatantly had feelings for Oliver, all for the sake of the writers throwing in some needless angst/drama, yet Oliciters hate Laurel for the Tommy/Oliver situation, when Tommy and Oliver were the ones who were causing the drama themselves, yet they make Felicity exempt of her treatment of Ray because ???? idk they just excuse her for everything whilst demonizing laurel and I don’t get it??????????????????? like,  you love her that’s great for you, that’s your opinion but when you love one character whilst hating another for being subjected to the same poor writing decisions you have to consider you’re hating for the sake of it.

Haters are just haters. They try and make excuses and come up with half-baked justifications for why they hate Laurel, but none of them hold any logical weight. It’s like those who demonize Laurel and say she’s “not like comic Black Canary” except Laurel is 136894742748482 times more like Dinah Lance than Arrow!Oliver is like his comic counterpart. Yet, they defend Oliver with “it’s a different take on the character” as if the same can’t be applied to Laurel/Black Canary. It’s nonsensical. 

Basically, to quote queen Laurel Lance: “It’s the hypocrisy that I can’t stand.”

If I see the “Marilyn Monroe was a size 16, therefore she was fat and everyone still thinks she is gorgeous” argument again I swear to God I will scream.

Marilyn was a size 16 by 1950’s standards. Sizing has changed dramatically since then, (and is still changing with the trend for vanity sizing, so fatties feel better about themselves), but these measurements show exactly how slim she was.

Fatties need to stop claiming Marilyn as one of them and face facts; she was a fit, healthy woman who was very slim but still curvy. PSA for lurking fatties; curvy means an hourglass shape with an attractive hip to waist ratio NOT one giant globe shape. If you cannot see your genitalia when you look down because your FUPA is in the way you are not curvy you are revolting.

Just stop with the attempts at self-justification and the pathetic excuses. It is proven that to lose weight all you need to do is reduce your calorie intake; not starve, not spend hours at the gym, just put the fork down FFS. Its not a difficult concept.

@des-zimbits

hello again!

it’s kind of a running theme that those who dare to have an opinion that runs counter to yours (which simply can’t be wrong) are blocked. and yep, that’s my situation right now! so hopefully one of your friends you love to confab with will send you this post.

the tides have turned on you lately! I’m sure you’ve noticed. so i’m gonna give you a suggestion. take it or leave it.

maybe listen to people when they call you on your shit. if you did, your block list wouldn’t be the length of the phone book. and especially, especially listen when poc are calling you on some racist shit you posted?! instead, you post a half-assed apology posing as a justification.

just yesterday, we had a “discussion” about kent fans excusing his abusive and manipulative behaviors. you got your feelings hurt by my post and i’ll cop to that. it wasn’t nicely worded. this isn’t daycare. you’re a thirty-year-old woman playing in a discourse-filled fandom on the internet. i do not owe you kindness.

nevertheless, you even said that you thought some of my points were valid! imagine my surprise, then, when i tried to write a response and assuage you about my intentions, only to find i couldn’t respond at all. and babe, if you’re going to try to critique my discussion skills, make sure you have yourself together.

but this ain’t even about me! you’re playing with fire now. and i’m sitting here trying to puzzle out how you could think that post was okay, or how you’re now trying to run a bizarre defensive play on it. politicians don’t even backtrack that fast!

(i’m a bitch too, but at least i own it. also, i’m not a racist who ardently defends their shitty white fave while lambasting poc. that helps.)

you’re excusing shitty behavior, shutting down any form of meaningful discourse, and blocking important voices of reason (especially the poc voices we should be amplifying) because you can’t handle being wrong. maybe it’s time to start acting your age.

but who cares, right? i’m blocked anyway.

xo, bren

Some rumors are flying that Castiel is gonna to make a grand sacrifice in the finale after crying all season on how much the Winchesters mean to him.

Frankly Cas does not deserve to sacrifice himself for the greater good, he hasn’t earned that right after years of screw ups and betraying the Winchesters.  Cas hasn’t worked hard to make amends toward the Winchesters, only towards heaven.  Cas needs to confess to Sam of his own involvement in season 4 for starting the apocalypse and letting Sam take all the blame.  Cas need to directly apologize to Sam and own his actions, none of the justification of I-was-only-following-orders, that excuse didn’t fly in Nuremberg.

You’ve probably seen it too often in movies, books, TV shows; basically all kinds of media- the idea that a woman is to blame for her partner cheating on her. Either she dedicates too much of her time to work, she doesn’t dedicate enough time to her appearance after having children, the reasons are endless. This is a way to make the decision of a man the fault of a woman. When your partner cheats on you, they are making an active choice. They are choosing to disrespect you, to hurt you, to put aside your feelings and purposely damage the relationship you have. If you have been cheated on, it is not your fault. It doesn’t matter than you’ve had a ‘dry spell’ (aka no sex for a while), it doesn’t matter that you work a lot or that your children are getting in the way of a sex life. Those are not justifications to go out and hurt you. You having a life outside of your relationship, working and making progress- that is not a bad thing. You do not deserve to be punished for working hard, for taking care of your family, for doing what you have to do. You deserve much better than somebody who would hurt you like that. Going back to a person who cheated on you is disrespecting yourself- how will you ever trust them again? There is no justification for infidelity. Any reasons are excuses for a decision YOUR PARTNER MADE. They chose it. They did it. You have no part in it. Love yourself enough to do whats best for you. Respect yourself enough to realize he does not respect you. Choosing to kiss, fuck, date somebody else is a despicable move and one he is fully responsible for. Do not ever feel bad for leaving someone who cheated on you, they are a terrible, cowardly excuse for a person and don’t deserve your sympathy, empathy or respect. It is never your fault.

consider this

“What are you doing?” he asks, but of course he already knows the answer. He knows her too well to ever misinterpret the purpose behind the gun pointed at him for anything less than protection. The only thing wrong was him thinking that perhaps he was included in that protection.

“What I have to,” she replies, the perfect echo of all the excuses he’d used before, all the justifications that had been ringing inside his head from the moment he shot Jaha to save Octavia. What I have to. They both know they didn’t have to do anything. They both know that those words only kept the demons at bay for so long. In the end, the guilt will swallow them whole no matter how many times they tell themselves that it was their only choice.

The gun trembles in her hand.

“Try again,” he says, hands over his head.

He can tell by the way her hand still, just for a moment, that she remembers, too. It seems like ages now, and they’re both so different from then, but Bellamy remembers that day with the gun, his fingers lingering too much on her back, the small, elated sound she made as the first gunshot rang true. He taught her how to shoot. It only seems fair that that scrap of kindness he’d showed was the one to kill him in the end.

Clarke opens her mouth, closes it, and tries again. “I’m keeping our people safe, Bellamy.”

“Our people?” he repeats, dumbfounded. “Our people, Clarke? Then how about Kane? Raven? Monty and Jasper and Harper?” Each name, each accusation, ripples through her. Her reaction is short, but violent – she steps back, just an inch, and he can tell that this is the first time she’s allowed herself to think about them, all the people on the other side of that wall. There shouldn’t be room for pity in Bellamy’s heart, clogged with so much fear and anger and the sting of betrayal, but there it is – sharp and cutting and brutal. He knows this had been a hard call for her to make.

But it was also a stupid call. “Octavia is still out there!” Bellamy takes a step down from the ladder, and Clarke’s gun follows him in an errant motion. She doesn’t want to do this. “My sister, Clarke!”

“She could be dead!” she shouts, and gasps when she realizes the bounds she’d overstepped.

Bellamy swallows, a bitter taste in his mouth. “We don’t know that,” he says, and yet it still feels like a lie.

Clarke’s face darkens, and his hand steadies a little bit. “I made a choice, Bellamy,” she says. “If you open that door, I swear I’ll—”

“You’ll shoot me?” He takes another step, lifts his arms from his body and offers his chest to her. “Go ahead, Clarke. You have a clear shot.”

Clarke blinks, and the tremors start up again. In another world, in a world where he still trusted her not to fire, he would have teased her about it, maybe even spend another day of his life teaching her hands to keep still. In this world, however, he only stares back at her defiantly, daring her to pull the trigger and knowing that if she did, the last thing he would feel was betrayal, and acceptance.

“Bellamy,” she says, a small, scared sound.

“Clarke,” he replies. “You’re going to leave so many people behind if you do this.”

“At least you won’t be one of them!” She sounded so helpless that for a moment Bellamy almost believes that she doesn’t have it in her to shoot him. But if he knew her at all, he was sure she would. She would do anything to keep their people safe and alive. Even if it meant killing everyone else, including him.

“Even if I survive, I will spend every waking moment of my life to hate you,” Bellamy growls, desperation and hurt clawing at his throat, begging to be let out. “I will hate you for saving me but not my sister. I will hate you for making a call that I know you already regret. I will hate you for giving up so damn easily. I will hate you for not trusting me. I will hate you, Clarke Griffin, and I’ll make sure you’ll know it.”

The words rang between them before being swallowed up by silence. For a few tense moments he thinks she will drop the gun. He allows himself to hope that this could still be resolved. But Clarke Griffin was nothing if not resolute. Her hand steadies for the first time since she’s pointed it at him. Her chin sets, and the fire in her eyes burns brighter than ever before, as if telling him that she could handle whatever brand of hatred he could deal. Something small and crucial breaks inside Bellamy, and he drops his arms.

“It’s your choice, Princess,” he says, and goes up the stairs.

“Bellamy.” Her voice cracks.

He places his hands on the lock.

“Bellamy, I’m not going to shoot you.”

Bellamy turns, confused, just in time to see Clarke lift the gun towards her head.

She places the barrel against her temple and meets his eyes with no hesitation.

“It’s your choice, King.”