Sup! I loved your recent heart/head meta. Pretty much agree with everything you said. I was just wondering what your read was on that glorious face caress from 4x13. I always interpreted it as their first flirtatious intimate moment. Like Bellamy, literally just touched her, because he WANTED to. It wasn't about comfort that time. And Clarke's reaction was just cute. Idk, I just found that to be such a leap in the intimacy they've always shared. What were thoughts on that particular moment?
Thanks nonny! Glad you liked my meta (not so recent now since I took approximately six years and seven days to answer this ask).
That glorious face caress is one of my FAVOURITE moments of the finale (there were a lot) and, honestly, the whole show. Seriously. Whenever I see it giffed on my dash I have to take at least a ten minute break from scrolling just to stare at it and die half a million small deaths.
I MEAN JUST LOOK AT THIS SHIT
(Adding gif by @xladymorganx cause I couldn’t find one that showed her face after the caress AND IT’S SO IMPORTANT OMG LOOK AT THE WAY SHE’S LOOKING AT HIM)
I like how you say it was Bellarke first flirtatious intimate moment. They’ve had flirtatious moments before, and they’ve had intimate moments but the oxymoron scene manages to combine both of those elements and the end product was MAGNIFICENT. There’s so many things that I love about it, I don’t even really know where to start - Bob and Eliza (especially Eliza, just look at her face dam) capture so. much. in this short little scene and I can’t believe how layered it is.
This moment, in retrospect, feels so tragic and heartbreaking. You can just see in Clarke’s eyes that she knows something is wrong, and she doesn’t think she can stop it this time. There’s this massive sense of foreboding that she feels and you can see it in her eyes. But what really breaks my heart about it is that there’s also so much love there in her eyes. You can tell in the way she sort of lingers after his touch that she wants more, she wants to lean into it. And that’s how I interpret her initial expression where she stares at him and just kind of blinks and looks away - almost like she’s shy, like she’s a girl falling in love for the first time (even though we know she’s fallen in love before).
But when she looks back, it’s almost with a kind of resignation. She looks sad, because she just can’t shake the feeling that she might not make it out of this alive, and she knows that she may never get to have that kind of relationship with Bellamy. But she wants it, dammit. So badly. And it hurts so much because she knows that she can’t have it.
Not just because she thinks there’s no time, (it always a problem with time *sigh*) but because if she’s right, and if she dies, then it means she would leave Bellamy behind. Clarke has been there already, losing two of her loves right after finally confessing her love/starting a relationship, and she just can’t put Bellamy through that pain. She can’t tell him she loves him, or kiss him, or hold him in the way that she wants to because she believes that she will die, and knows that when she’s gone it will only be even more excruciating for him to let her go.
She doesn’t hold back because she wants to, she does it because she loves him too much to put him through that heartbreak of losing her right after finally getting to love her in the way they both want.
Fuck. I’m emo about this all over again.
did i ever really stop being emo tho
I think that, in the fandom, people like to focus a lot on how Bellamy looks at Clarke - which does make sense, considering a lot of people first started shipping Bellarke based on the evolution of Bob’s subtle expression changes when staring at Clarke - but sometimes there’s a scene where Clarke is looking at Bellamy like THAT and it just kills me. Repeatedly. I love the way Bellamy looks at Clarke, don’t get me wrong, but we talk about it all the time and I feel like we just don’t talk about it as much with Clarke.
BUT LOOK AT HOMEGIRL’S FACE !!!!
She is SO in love and you can see it right there in her eyes. Clear as day.
You know what? I think I just realized something about this moment that makes me love it so much. Clarke’s wall that she has so carefully built up has just … completely evaporated. She is so vulnerable in this moment, unlike basically any other time we’ve seen her. Every emotion is right there on her face to see: the fear, the love, the dread. It’s all there. She just can’t hide it, not with Bellamy.
And that bare, uncovered honesty and vulnerability … that is intimate. The way Bellamy reaches out to touch her, without even really thinking about it because it just feels right, is intimate. And the way that she doesn’t stop him, almost leans into his touch, is intimacy too.
How many people do you let touch your face? Because I fucking hate when people touch my face. If a stranger does it, it’s creepy. If a friend does it, it’s weird. Face caresses like that just aren’t platonic gestures. You’d only let someone touch you like that if you feel 100% and totally comfortable around them, if you really love them.
You’re right - the intimacy runs deep in this scene.
And like you said, there’s no real reason for Bellamy to reach out to touch her face. He could have just mentioned that she’s burning up. It wasn’t even really meant to be comforting (although it probably was comforting for Clarke, to some extent), it really seems like Bellamy just impulsively reached his hand out to touch her because she was right there and he. just. couldn’t. help. himself.
Fuck. He loves her so much (!!) I’m actually physically aching right now.
The way he caresses her face is SO SOFT I could literally cry about it. And her face fucks me up in so many ways (which I’ve already talked about). I crave death, holy shit.
Man, why would you do this to me nonny? I’m DYING.