no i don't have actual work to be doing why do you ask

Comic Poison Ivy in the last 15 years: Hey you know, the whole man-hating evil seductress trope is kinda old and disrespectful and it’s time to recognize the potential of this complex and interesting character. We’ll focus on making her more sympathetic and less crazy. We’ll show she has a deep, real, and profound connection to the earth. We’ll show that she is struggling to maintain her humanity in light of a darkening situation and that she still feels compassion for human life, as it is also part of the earth. She will only apathetically kill people who are 100% irredeemable. She will have many moments in which she spares human life. She will have many complicated relationships with other women in the Universe, including Batgirl, Catwoman, Harley Quinn, Wonder Woman, Black Canary, the Birds of Prey, and many others. These relationships will range from uneasy trust or anger to understanding and love. She will not show romantic interest in men and will not be a sexually driven character. She will be a member of many hero teams, including the Birds of Prey and the Justice League, even if there are missteps in the writing of the character. Most of the Bat-family will recognize Ivy as a grey-area case that must be handled on an individual basis and will acknowledge that her situation is centered around tragedy and loss of self. They will recognize that Ivy could very well be the thing the saves the entire planet. They will recognize that Arkham is making her worse, and will do what they can to reason with her. 

Wonder Woman will acknowledge that the Green and Mother Gaia chose Ivy as her protector and that she was wise to do so. (Sensation Comics #31)

Batgirl will show numerous moments of concern and understanding and will even acknowledge that if they were in another world, their relationship would be very different. She will value Ivy’s powers as a source of good and believes Ivy’s struggle stems from the flawed nature of humanity. (Batgirl Annual #2, various)

Batman will return to Ivy to ask her for help, knowing that when the world is at stake, she is a trustworthy ally to the Earth. (Swamp Thing) (Sensation Comics) (Detective Comics, various) (Justice League United) (Animal Man)

There will be many moments where the relationship between the part of Ivy that is still human and the part that is the Green struggle to cooperate or have complexities in their natures. (Cycle of Life and Death) (No Man’s Land) (Birds of Prey)

Harley Quinn will express implicit love for Ivy and in certain series, they will be in a canon loving relationship. This will not be subtext as it has been in the past. We will show an actual relationship between two women that isn’t just for eyecandy. (Harley Quinn series) (Bombshells)

Yes, there will be missteps in the canon as many different hands are working between many different series, but overall the character will have undergone a complete transformation that far exceeds the previous incarnations.

Every Media Outside of Comics, obsessed with an Ivy that hasn’t existed prominently in 15 years: u know, the slutty evil plant lady?

Harry's interview on Quotidien
  • I: Can you hear me?
  • H: Yes
  • I: Welcome to Paris!
  • H: Thank you
  • I: How are you? Can you answer in French?
  • H: Good! A little bit. A tiny bit. Très bien et toi ?(very good and you?)
  • I: Very good, thank you. We start our interviews with “can you give us your five favourites words in English or French. Or a French sentence”. Someone told me you knew a French sentence.
  • H: Comment vous faites un café si délicieux? (How do you make such a delicious coffee?)
  • I: OK, that’s good.
  • H: That’s all I have.
  • I: Do you say it very often?
  • H: No... Yes
  • I: What does France mean to you? Is it something, someone etc...?
  • H: Best people I’ve known... I think her, *shows a fan* I guess. Fabien Barthez.
  • I: Yes, Fabien Barthez. Harry, you’re 23 years old and you’re one of the best known pop-star in the world. Everybody has expectations with your new album and single Sign Of The Times. Why did you choose that song? This is not what people were expecting.
  • H: I think I wanted to.. I've always liked music that made me feel something. You know I think writing it I could feet something I wanted to bring it out. I think it's a good indicator for me of what the album is to me. That's why I wanted to go with that first.
  • I: Billboard wrote that the single was "one of the more ambitious opening statements in pop this decade". Not bad, isn't it?
  • H: Thanks!
  • I: Do you have friends working at Billboard?
  • H: I don't know anyone at Billboard.
  • I: When we listen to the song we think of David Bowie, Queen, who else did you think of?
  • H: I mean, I think everyone, anything, any song you've ever listened to growing up or throughout your life or you've enjoyed, inspired you. There are a lot of different things. I wanted to just write and see what came out. I didn't know what I sounded like to make an album. So this process was as interesting for me as I think it will be for people listening to the album for the first time.
  • I: Do you know French singers other than Serge Gainsbourg? That's a tricky question.
  • H: I know Woodkid. He directed my music video.
  • I: Why him?
  • H: I think his videos are amazing, he's a really talented guy and I love French people so I worked with him.
  • I: When you're in Spain, do you say that you love Spanish people?
  • H: No!
  • I: It seems like everything has been easy...
  • H: Great tie.
  • I: You think so? It's French.
  • H: It's not a Spanish tie, isn't it?
  • I: Can I see your loafer? Oh yes! What is the brand? That's not French, isn't it? It's Italian.
  • H: No.
  • I: That's from the European Union!
  • H: Probably yeah.
  • I: It seems like everything has been easy for you, is it true?
  • H: Was what simple?
  • I: Your life, everybody wants a life like yours, with One Direction...
  • H: I mean, I feel very lucky to be able to make music, I feel very lucky to be able to make this, I feel very lucky today being in France and performing my song. I love this song. I can't complain.
  • I: What were the unpleasant things?
  • H: *thinking*
  • I: I don't know, say only one thing.
  • H: I think when you care so much about something, it's hard to get to the point where you feel like it's finished and it feels like you're adding and it never ends and it adds up. So I think the hardest part was getting into that point and be like "ok that's finished."
  • I: You said to the Rolling Stone magazine that most of the album was inspired by a woman. Really?
  • H: No I think, honestly, the album is much more about me than it is about anyone else. I think if I said the album is about a woman it kind of feels like, I don't know, I put a lot of work into this. I don't feel like it revolves around woman. It's a lot about me and things I've never said before. It's more about me.
  • I: How did you start with a boy band and end with a solo career? Is it complicated?
  • H: It's been a lot of fun. You know we were very lucky to get to do some amazing things and at the moment in our lives, we're in a time where everyone is trying their own thing and have a good time. It's been amazing to see everyone doing their own thing as well. If I can do as well as the others, it'd be amazing.
  • I: Do you call them everyday or text them? Do you use What's app?
  • H: I don't have that.
  • I: Why?
  • H: Yes we talk, absolutely. And everyone is bringing stuff out. It's been a lot going on. It's been a good time.
  • I: This is the album cover! Can you describe it? Why did you choose this picture?
  • H: Yeah. So, I don't know. I worked with photographer Harley Weir, I'm a massive fan of her work. And that's amazing and I was lucky enough to work with her. I felt like this was what I wanted.
  • I: Why is it pink? Why the water? Why your back? Why? It's beautiful but why is it pink?
  • H: I don't know, man!
  • I: Really? You don't know?
  • H: I don't know. I don't think I want...
  • I: Apparently pink is Rock'n'roll's colour.
  • H: Apparently so. I don't know. I think it means something to me and if it means anything to anyone else, I wouldn't want to take away from that by explaining it. I think the cool thing about stuff like photos and art is you can just leave it. You don't have to explain it.
  • I: Everybody sees what they want to see.
  • H: Yes exactly.
  • I: Have you seen this?
  • *video of people reacting to Harry's single*
  • I: Your fans record themselves while listening to the song for the first time. You can hear relevant analysis and apparently they all really liked it. Do you read what people say about you on social media? On Youtube, Twitter, Instagram? Do you use Instagram?
  • H: Yes I use it a little bit.
  • *The public disagrees with Harry*
  • H: Yes I use it a little bit. I mean I wish everyone was having as good time as the girl who was like that with her hands. That's what I do when I listen to the song.
  • I: Are you the one using your Instagram? Do you use your own fingers or someone else does it for you?
  • H: Yes, I do mine.
  • I: Do you still vote in Redditch?
  • H: In?
  • I: Redditch!
  • H: That's where I was born?
  • I: Yes.
  • H: I don't live in Redditch.
  • I: So you don't vote there. Where did you vote?
  • H: London, yeah.
  • I: What do you think of the Brexit? Welcome to Europe!
  • H: Thank you very much, thanks. I mean, I don't really comment on politics. To me, anything that brings people together is better than things that pull people apart. That's ... yeah.
  • I: Yet, you are in favour of equality of rights, men, women, gay people, straight people... That's politics.
  • H: I don't know. It doesn't feel like politics. I think stuff like equality feels much more fundamental. I feel like everyone is equal. That doesn't feel like politics to me.
  • I: Your fans are fetishists. They know all of your tattoos, piece of jewellery, they have heart attacks when you cut your hair. Right now you're playing with their feelings. Do you know that?
  • H: Oh ok.
  • I: Yes! What is your favourite tattoo?
  • H: I think... I have a.. probably. I don't know, actually.
  • I: Which one is the latest?
  • H: The latest is this one there. *shows Arlo* And this one. *shows Jackson*
  • I: Jackson? All of them?
  • H: Yes.
  • I: What's the story behind your haircut? How much did you spend on hair products with One Direction?
  • H: Yeah, like a lot. I used a lot, yeah.
  • I: You're in Dunkirk, Christopher Nolan's new movie.
  • H: Yes.
  • I: How did you do?
  • H: I auditioned.
  • I: Look at you there.
  • H: I am, that's me.
  • I: Yes.
  • H: I auditioned and it was great. It's going to be a really cool movie.
  • I: Harry, it feels like we know you since you're a baby. The whole world discovered you in 2010 on X Factor.
  • *video of Harry's X Factor audition*
  • I: You auditioned alone but Simon Cowell had an idea... he put you in a band with Zayn, Louis, Liam and Niall. You became One Direction. You found the name One Direction and you sold millions of albums. One Direction are soon considered as the new Beattles and you filled the biggest stadiums. The whole world was talking about you. When you go out we prayed for your eardrums. You became UK's pride. David Cameron is in one of your music videos, your sang for the Queen. But in 2015... bang! Zayn left the band, fans couldn't get over it. But don't worry, their favourite is now on the cover of the Rolling Stone magazine, he's in Christopher Nolan's new movie, he's Mick Jagger on SNL... What you don't know is that we've met in 2012. You were in France to promote an album and now I have questions. First one! When you're in a car and fans are all around you, do you see that?
  • *video of fans around a car*
  • H: I think I've actually lost my shoe there. When I got in the car... I got in the car and I was like "how many shoes do I have?" Yes I lost my shoe.
  • I: I have another question! Do you still do that before going on stage?
  • *video of Harry and Lou*
  • I: Can we do it?
  • H: No.
  • *does it anyway*
  • I: What is the weirdest question someone asked you?
  • H: I think it was actually a French interview. I got asked if I would pee in a sink... Yeah.
  • I: Ok, that's weird!
  • H: It was the first question, the first question.
  • I: It puts you in the mood.
  • H: Yeah.
  • I: What is the question you never want to be asked ever again? Did I asked you that question?
  • *Harry asks the public*
  • H: Which one? Oh crush.
  • I: What?
  • H: Crush.
  • I: Oh ok. I didn't ask it! Did you know that a French author wrote a novel about you. It's called "Styles", it's about his obsession with you. It's in French. You can translate it.
  • H: Oh! Is that true?
  • I: Yes it's true. He dedicated to you. It's called "Styles" and it's a really good book. Read it!
  • H: Thank you.
  • I: Thank you very much Harry Styles for coming tonight. His first eponymous album comes out on the 12th May. Thank you Harry Styles.
  • H: Thank you.
  • I: Have a safe journey home.

@thunderboltsortofapenny said: No no let’s do this! Why would steve need to be fake married. Or why would bucky need to be fake married to Steve. We need a reason. #Viper do the thing #It’ll be fun!

So I did the thing, and it’s stupid and terrible, but here, have it:


Bucky’s an EMT. Normal guy, just living his life, trying to help where he can. And then one day, all of a sudden, the aliens are invading NYC, and Bucky’s out there helping, right in the middle of the danger zone because of course he is.

There’s a fight going on, and a bunch of freaks in weird suits seem to be fighting the aliens, but Bucky doesn’t have much time to focus on anything other than all the people in dire need of medical attention. He does what he can to help, grabs the first metal bar he can find and fights only the aliens getting in his way, and works himself to exhaustion. Then there’s a blast, and it sends a man flying right into the wall next to him.

“Hey, you okay?” Bucky asks, rushing to help him, and though Bucky could’ve sworn the blow was hard enough to crush anyone’s ribs, he’s surprised to see the man–who must’ve been on his way to a costume party–stand up practically unscathed.

He’s got broad shoulders and a strong jaw and eyes of the prettiest shade of blue Bucky’s ever seen, and even with his face covered in soot and grime and blood, Bucky’s heart skips a beat.

For a few seconds the man seems a bit disoriented, then he finally registers Bucky’s presence. “What are you doing here?? Get out of the streets!”

“I was–” Bucky starts, and is cut off by an explosion right above their heads and a bunch of debris raining down on them, and a hand shoving him aside.

When he comes to, which is a surprise in itself, the dust has started to clear, and the man who’s clearly saved his life is carrying him as if he weighed nothing, concern in those beautiful eyes and a big, warm hand pressed tenderly against Bucky’s neck, checking for a pulse.

He locks eyes with Bucky and sighs in relief, the hint of a smile on his plush lips, but the hand remains where it is. “Hi,” he says. “You all right?”

“Y-yeah… Thank you,” Bucky replies, but he doesn’t move to free himself of the man’s arms. His stomach is doing something weird, and the man surely has other people to rescue, but for a few seconds they both just stay there, shell-shocked and staring at each other like the world around them has stopped.

Then something blows up nearby, and the spell is broken.

Carefully, the man helps him to his feet, makes sure Bucky’s in one piece, and then says, “Find shelter, okay? Stay inside.”

Bucky’s not planning to, but he can’t find it in him to tell that to this incredible man, so he slowly licks his lips and nods. Before turning around to leave, the man offers him a small, shy smile.

- - - - -

During the next few weeks after the Chitauri attack on NYC, every single piece of footage of the Avengers fighting against the aliens and helping civilians goes viral. Phone videos, security cameras, blurry pics.

The most popular, by far, is a snapshot of Captain America carrying a guy, who can be seen fighting aliens and helping people in other videos, bridal style, thumb caressing his jaw, and both looking like lovestruck teenagers.

Bucky can’t go to the grocery store or even do his job without being stalked by the paparazzi or Cap’s groupies or just random people wanting to know what his Avenger name is, and for how long he’s been dating Captain America.

- - - - -

“You’ve ruined my life!!” Bucky tells him, because of course, of course Captain America would pick Bucky’s park for his morning run. Of course Bucky’d slip on wet leaves on the pavement precisely this morning, and of fucking course Captain America would just happen to be around to catch him at just the right time. Bucky’s seeing red.

“I’m sorry,” Captain America says, and it’s extremely unfair just how genuine and how much like a kicked puppy he looks.

Christ, Bucky wants to punch him.

- - - - -

Steve’s been living in PR hell.

He’s spent the past weeks “saving” girls and boys alike from getting hit by a bicycle, or fainting, or a fuckton of equally stupid shit.

The second anyone spots Captain America, there’ll suddenly be some kind of dangerous situation going down, and someone hoping Cap will carry them bridal style to safety and maybe fall head over heels in love with them in the process.

Steve is tired and done and ready to get back in the ice for another few decades, and shares Pepper’s worries that someone might actually put themself in real danger soon.

“We should handle this before it gets worse,” Nat says. And Steve agrees, of course, but he just doesn’t know how.

“Just marry the guy,” Clint suggests.

Steve almost chokes to death on his own spit.

“WHAT?”

Clint shrugs. “Why not? Half the world already thinks you’re dating…”

“Clint, he hates me…”

“Only cause people keep pestering him about this. If you two get married it’ll be a circus, but then it’ll blow over. He can’t even do his job right now, right? So you pay the guy for the trouble, yadda yadda, then when this is over you two get a quick divorce, and that’s it. Problem solved.”

For two minutes, no one else opens their mouth. Then:

“He’s got a point…”

“Tony, no,” Steve whines.

“You saw the footage, how he was helping those civilians… If you have to marry someone, he’s not a bad candidate,” Nat says, and then smirks. “Plus, he’s cute.”

Steve already knows he’s lost this battle, but that doesn’t help him feel any better about this. Yes, he’s cute. Yes, he’s a brave and kind and smart guy. Yes, Steve could very easily pretend to be married to him for a while and yes it’d help them both. None of that’s the problem.

The problem is that he kind of really likes the guy.

The problem is that the guy hates him.

This is a really, really bad idea.

So Something Happened at Phoenix Con

I’m not usually one to complain, or criticize, or speak out at all really. I’m one of those fans that just quietly sits in the corner and admires from afar, silently praising all the guys for what they do. But every now and again, someone does something that lights me up, and I’m off like a firecracker.

As I’m sure you’ve concluded, that happened recently.

I’m a Jared girl, but I love and respect all the actors equally. Respect being a keyword here. Phoenix con 2017 is going on now. As it so happens, that’s exactly where this incident took place. Yesterday. On the day mostly recognized as Misha’s day of the con.

Let’s all just agree that Misha is an incredible human okay? He’s actual such an incredible human that he borders on being a real life angel. He deserves all the good things in the world. Which is why I am particularly fired up because of what happened.

**Not naming names because this is not to bash anyone, just to draw attention to the fact that these are people with real, human emotions**

I’m going to summarize this the best I can because, honestly, the more I talk about it the angrier I get (and I’m not an angry person, this just really doesn’t sit well with me).

Long story short, there was a con-goer that had been to a con in the past and she had Misha sign her arm. Misha had said that if she still had the autograph on her arm the next time he saw her, he would buy her ice cream. No harm in that part. This is where things start getting…. Uncomfortable.

The girl then decided she was going to take Misha up on that (which, admit it, we would all try to keep Misha’s auto on us as long as we could, bet or not). But, instead of doing any number of options that would be considered safe and acceptable, she peeled off her skin, including the autograph, and preserved it.

Are you still with me? Hold on. I’m not done yet.

At Phoenix Con, she then adhered it back to her skin. Now, I’m not sure if she showed it to him during a panel, or ops, or autos, or where. But when she did show it to him, he told her to take it off.

**this is where I get seriously pissed**

So, she takes it off. AND FUCKING THROWS IT AT HIM.

This girl, who claims to love and respect Misha Collins throws a piece of her dry, dead, decaying skin at him. It lands in his lap and his handler has to come pick it up. She tries to excuse it by saying ‘it’s all in good fun’ and that he’s ‘used to her by now’, but let’s make a few things clear.

It’s all in good fun? I’m sorry, I have never once in my life have gone around throwing preserved skin at people for the fun of it. And I’ve asked some of my friends (the ones that wouldn’t call the cops on me for asking such a question) and they all said the same thing. I don’t care if you’re a celebrity or Mary Jane that lives next door, people don’t like having dead skin thrown on them. Especially a stranger’s skin.

Secondly, no matter how many times we meet them, they really don’t know us. They don’t know if you’ve got any diseases. They might not even recognize you, really. How many times have you seen someone at work over and over and over again but don’t really know them? I have. I’ll admit it. And you know what? It is my job to interact and build report with customers. And I’m not a celebrity – I don’t have millions of people begging for time with me.

I guess I made this post for a few reasons:

1.       Is my anger justified or misplaced? Taking into consideration that, while I’ve never met them (Pitt Con is so far away), I do love them like they’re family

2.       I’m open to opinions.

3.       I want to make a PSA that Jared, Jensen, and Misha – hell EVERYONE – are human. Don’t do something to them that you wouldn’t like having done to you. If you wouldn’t like have dead animals thrust into your hand, don’t make them hold one. If you wouldn’t like someone to throw decaying organs on you, don’t do it to them! You paid money for a ticket to the con. You did not pay money to abuse them.

I know I’m going to probably get hate for this, and to be honest, I really don’t care. If you think I’m right, great. I’m glad someone sees this from where I’m at and finds it just as wrong as I do. If you think I’m wrong then… well, you keep doing whatever you think is right. We’ll agree to disagree.

tl;dr – Don’t throw your decaying, preserved skin at Misha because he’s a human and it’s disgusting on so many levels. Show him respect. Show all of them respect. You know Misha is too kind to say anything about how uncomfortable it makes him, so just save everyone from being awkward, and save the fandom from feeling like we have to apologize for the actions of a single fan.

In stream the other day, we started talking about an Avengers Mall AU, and now I can’t stop thinking about it, because I have so many years of bad retail stories built up in my head and non-powered AUs usually don’t work for me, but the longer I think about it, the funnier this gets.

Steve and Sam are two guys who retired from their military branches and teamed up to run an artesian bespoke candy shop.  Steve has no idea half of their sales comes from the fact that Sam put the candy pulling hook in the front window and teenage girls just stand there, drooling.  Sam is totally aware of this, and uses it to ALL his advantage when he’s doing the sugar work.  

Bucky took a part time job at the Hot Topic across the way because hell, he was spending all his time hanging out with Sam and Steve, might as well get paid.  He was the only reliable employee over the age of seventeen; he is now the manager and he’s FURIOUS about it.  His staff is made up of Nico, Kamala and Sam Alexander and various people who get hired and then don’t make it through the training because Bucky glaring at you while you take register training is just SO HARD TO HANDLE.  No one is sure if he’s after Sam or Steve or both.

The SHIELD crew runs a pretty decent mall restaurant, but yeah, used to be a Golden Corral and Fury reserves the right to yell “Do you see a buffet here?” at anyone dumb enough to think it still is.  He doesn’t actually do it, because most of the people who are confused enough to ask are retirees who remind him of his grandma, but still.  He reserves the right.  Nat is a truly terrifying line cook, Maria’s front of house, and Phil’s the head waiter.  Clint doesn’t actually work there, but he’ll put on an apron and belt out an impressive rendition of ‘Happy Birthday’ in exchange for free food, and no one else on staff wants to do it, so he eats there A LOT.

Clint is always in the mall.  In the back corridors.  Hanging out in the food court.  Wandering up and down the anchor store escalators.  Everyone thinks he works somewhere else.  No one knows where he actually works.  There is a betting pool.  It has been building for YEARS.

Jan runs the sort of high end boutique that has like, four outfits in two sizes on six gigantic racks.  There are no prices.  You do not ask how much it is. You know if you can afford it.  If she likes you, you can afford it.

Thor runs the hardware store.  No one knows why the hardware store is there.  This is not the sort of place one would see a hardware store.  Thor says he inherited it from his father, and it was there before the mall, and no one really wants to look into it.  Mostly, they seem to get by on selling knives..  Big knives.  Little knives.  Knives as long as your arm.  They get by on selling knives, because who’s buying screws at this place?  Oh, right, anyone Sif TELLS to buy screws.  "You need screws.“  "Oh, no, I-”  "You can always use more screws.“  "Y-yes, ma'am.”  She might be domming half of their customers without knowing it.  The Warriors Three run the stock room.  Badly.

Bruce runs the used bookstore down on the lower level where he can’t really afford the rent but the mall management like saying there’s a bookstore, and no one else is going to rent that hole, so he gets to stay, hiding in his piles and piles and piles of used books.  Mostly science and history, but he does a brisk business in romance novels and murder mystery paperbacks.  He likes it down there.  He wishes people would stop trying to get him to come upstairs to socialize.  He also kind of wishes people would stop coming down TO socialize.  His cousin Jennifer runs the register and helps the customers most days, she’s very quiet and very mild mannered and wears very lumpy clothes and giant eighties style glasses, so no one recognizes her when she goes to her second job, as a crossfit instructor for the gym on the top floor.  Jenn is, as they say, RIPPED. Put her in a leotard and her whole personality changes, it’s like she’s a different person.

Carol is a recovering alcoholic ex-pilot who runs the bar at the ‘bad’ chain restaurant down on the far end of the ground floor.  Other than the SHIELD place or the food court, it’s the only place to eat in the mall, and honestly, you’d be better off in the food court.  The food is trash, but she can mix a mean mojito and she knows every secret of every worker in the place, and she’s paid double on Saturdays because she’s her own bouncer.

Jessica Drew runs the arcade on the main floor, one of those stupid ones with 'glow mini-golf’ and games that constantly spit out tickets, you know, legalized gambling for children.  It’s a chain, but the give out far too many prizes and she and her staff (Peter, Miles, Anya) would be fired if they also weren’t the highest grossing location on the eastern seaboard.  They throw the best birthday parties in the state, and have a waiting list that’s like, months long.

Wanda’s shop sells… Something.  No one knows what any of this stuff does.  Or if it’s legal to own.  But when you find something you want, OH GOD YOU REALLY WANT IT.  She mostly sits and reads, and drinks tea from Hank McCoy’s tea shop. 

Stephen Strange quit his job as a surgeon and retired to run a magic and joke shop.  If you ask him why, he just shrugs and said he made some very bad choices.  A relative somewhere oversea, Asia, Clint says it was somewhere in Asia, died and left him some sort of inheritance.  So now he just sells fake rubber vomit and teaches slight of hand.  Buy him a drink, and learn more than you wanted to know about card tricks.  Walk into his shop, and be prepared to sit through at LEAST four card tricks before you can escape.

Greer run’s “Tigra’s Treasure Trove” on the second floor, it’s the anime and manga and gaming and comic shop.  She wears cat ears and a tail.  Every day.  No one’s sure if she does it to bring in the otaku, or if it’s a lifestyle choice.  No one wants to ask.

Tony owns the mall.  Owns like a hundred malls across the country.  No one knows, Obie does the day to day running of the management company, but Tony owns them.  He’s mostly in it for the buying and selling, but he likes this mall.  This one.  He likes it here.

He has a Sharper Image type store on the top floor.  It’s him and Rhodey and Pepper and Pepper will kill them both one of these days but he sells the sort of stuff you do not need but God you want it.  You walk into his store and it’s all apple store chic, white and chrome and gleaming surfaces, collapseable tablets and robots and holographic projectors and all the geek chic that you want and everyone in the mall wants something from him, they’ve all got something on layaway (he only does layaway for other retail workers because he doesn’t want to keep track of this stuff) except Steve and it makes him insane.  He spends far too much time trying to figure out what he can stock or create or build that will get Steve into his shop.

Pepper calls them “Steve-Grabbers,” Like 'grandma grabbers’ but designed to attract the most sincere hipster she’s ever met and she’d kill Tony over adding this stuff to stock without telling her, but it all sells.  It all sells.  In his desperate attempt to attract Steve, Tony misses and attracts EVERYONE ELSE.

anonymous asked:

Hi, 7goodangel. I am here to ask you about PaperJam as a shy, smol and innocent being (mainly thegreatrouge made him be). There has been some conflicts regarding his trait. Some said his canonical personality is a jerk, like what you wrote in his bio / info and some said that is severely wrong and being shy, (which made him shipped with Fresh), is his canonical personality. What are your thoughts about this? I mean, it is your character and people are taking control of it. Don't you disagree?

Well… I have talked to people and seen public conversations and this has happened several times to me over months. I guess I’ve gotten a little numb to it now… or maybe it’s due to school that I haven’t given it the attention that it deserves. Probably due to school. 

I just can’t update constantly like others - even though some others in school were and are able to update constantly. I can’t keep going around and holding up my bio of PJ and police people. It’s exhausting to me… it really takes up the small bit of free time I have. 

I think after I get a solid job that I’ll be able to go around better… but anyway - back to your question. 


While I love seeing interpretations and do not want people to be limited by something and have their imaginations go forth… it’s proving that a huge con comes with that mentality - which you have pointed out. A lot of people swear that PJ is the cute, innocent interpretation that really, did get PJ popular in the first place. While I did have him as a jerk from the beginning - I kinda kept that info to my RP blog - so you could say it is my fault this is all happening and I do think that. I could of done something to make it not as bad as it is now… 

It’s just like the NSFW stuff… people just assume the first thing and run with it. And it really does make me feel like I really am not needed for my own character at points. 

It’s a struggle - I don’t want to have people stop interpreting PJ within AUs… but I also don’t want people to just see him as an innocent child to ship with Fresh. 

And I’m still trying to find the best solution to it. 

But… I feel like the damage is already done. It’s too late for me to talk to all of these people going around swearing on their life that PJ is canoncally like Rouge’s interpretation/AUs. It feels like an hopeless battle to me. 

And I guess I needed someone to ask me this question so then I can fully say my thoughts on this. 

So in short, while I love creativity and don’t want to snuff it out (considering some people would probably think I’m doing that already with saying “No Sin”), I still don’t like it. It irritates me, irks me, frustrates me, and I feel like even as the person who thought of PJ in the first place, my voice isn’t enough. Communities seem like they don’t care about artists unless they reach a ‘certain goal of popularity’ or seem like they have a more professional style of art. I know I do not reach either of those titles. 

People misspell my username all the time - I actually claimed ‘7goodangle’ on tumblr for that reason.

People still say “I’m too lazy to find who made PJ” when they clearly mentioned they looked at the bio on the wiki. 

People still go around arguing others on the canon ship of OmniPJ and swearing that FreshPaper is the true canon ship, when all people are pointing out is that they need to keep the canon ship in mind when going around with information.

Even just basic personality traits… and these things are happening on sites that I do not nor want an account for. 

I still want others to have fun - to be happy; but I don’t know… I guess I’m cutting out my own happiness to get everyone else happy? I want to eventually write a version of PJ within his own universe and story… and he is more like the version I created within the UT verse. Not exact - but close. Though who knows… I might shove PJ to the side and replace his role with another character. I’m still weighing options.

Cause PJ was the first character I ever put this much time and thought into… my first character that was balanced, well rounded…

And what happens?

…well.

You said it Anon. 

They took it - changed it (initially as an AU but now people think it’s canon) - and I can’t do much about it. Due to school and not much free-time… due to how many don’t know the true creator… and just back talking anyone who is just mentioning it to people who swear by it. 

As an artist and a character designer…

It makes me not want to show designs, characters, and stories ever again online.

Considering if this is how I was treated on the first one… why even take a chance at a second one? If it has brought me so much stress, frustration, and time… why even try it again?

I said I was only going to do fanart so if anyone stole it, it didn’t really matter. 
I think I should have stuck with that thought process. 

In conclusion, there are some major things to take away here. First – that yes, I do not like how it has skewed this far to the point of arguing over a fandom version with the canon. Canon is canon and I get the different AUs – this is too far. Way too far. I am emotionally drained from this – from this whole mess that I have been defending throughout majority of PJ’s lifespan. I will state this – Paper Jam is my character. He is my original character that I created more than a year ago. And the UT AU fandom took my character and warped him to something he is not and all of his original meaning is lost. I do not like to hurt others or make other sad – but I must put my foot fully down. This miscommunication needs to stop. I am tired of repeating things over and over and I have past my breaking point time and time again. I just want people to see PJ how he really is… and I wish that people could be focusing more on the reality of him instead of the alternate that they all claim as truth.

Final words: I still like Undertale – I still like creating characters and having fun – but the Undertale AU fandom is ridiculous now. The Amino UT community is insanity in an app, and there is a lot of stuff that has made many artists and creators to their breaking point and leaving the fandom entirely. Everyone in this fandom needs to take ten steps back and look at what they are doing. Go back to the game. Play it again – watch your favorite let’s player’s videos of it again. 

And just… food for thought… please don’t jump the gun on someone else’s OC’s personality and actions. 

I do not want anyone to experience what I had.

Humans Are Weird

It is well established among all sentient species that Humans are Weird. Exceptional Humans, however, make the regular humans seem almost tame in comparison.
Yatrov was to show the newest crew member- another Human- “the ropes”, as Human Jenny phrased it.
Upon arriving, however, the newest Human barely spared xir even a glance, which was odd, seeing how Humans prize interaction above all else. Shrugging it off, xe delicately held out a clawed hand to engage in the Human positive-meeting greeting, a “hand-shake” it was aptly named. “I am known as Yatrov, in Human Common tongue. I am sorry to say that I was unable to read your file report, and am thus left without your name. What is it you wish to be called?” Yatrov was genuinely sorry; the ship was in dire need of repairs, and this Human was coming to help.
Instead of taking the proffered hand, the human’s brown eyes stared into xi’s own violet. “I am Giovanni. And you are approximately 7 minutes late. I do not fault you for your tardiness, your job is a busy one, so your apologies are void. I do not need to see the entirety of this ship, I only require the engine room. Take me there and I will begin repairs immediately. Social niceties and other such meaningless things can be done at a later date, if done they must be at all.”
Yatrov felt somewhat slighted; xe’s species did not greet with touch, but it was seen as an insult- a social misdemeanor- to deny the shaking of hands. Attributing it to the Human having been under circumstances that made him “cranky” and to the fact that the Human was excited to work- humans forgot norms when excited, xe had found- Yatrov continued to try to create a pack-bond with this Human, “I have heard many great things about you.”
“Truly?” The Human considered this for a moment, head tilting, “I am merely faster than most, mentally. A marathoner or racer is not spoken of in as high-esteem as those with quick mental facilities are, are they?” The Human was speaking out loud, xe found this practice odd and ignored it. “What exactly have you heard?” The Human tapped their legs with their fingers, adopting a rhythm unknown to xir, and hummed. 
Arrogance or curiosity? “Admittedly, not much has been told. I know that you have several thesis papers, have repaired and improved upon numerous ships, and that you were good enough that our captain was surprised that you even bothered to consider joining our crew.”
“Huh.” And that was that. Giovanni did not speak after that, made no effort to communicate. Giovanni did not try to obtain physical contact. Giovanni remained aloof with even Human crewmates long after he had joined. He also remained fidgety, seemingly unable to keep still, unless it was to engage in a staring contest with the resident cat- to keep the Humans from adopting a weird, deadly creature- or to continue his single-minded work with machinery.
Three weeks after he had joined, the ship was attacked. Vernians boarded the ship, using their many appendages to apprehend multiple members of The Highlight- the ship- at once. No one knew where Giovanni was, and no one would have been surprised if he had left to save his own hide.
Which was precisely why everyone, who were all bound and trying to negotiate with what was essentially pirates, was surprised when Giovanni came around the corner, a knocked out Vernian held under gun point.
Guns pointed at him, Vernians shifted to attack him. “What you need to know: firstly, I have hacked into your language processors. All Vernae will sound like gibberish.” He paused, then grinned ferally. “Try”, he dared.
“Kir-ah?!” They did, and did not seem pleased with the results.
“Back! Restore!” the voices of Vernians screeched, their language translators on the fritz. 
“Secondly,” he paused, “I will shoot your friend if you do not release my own.” When an uproar of shouting started again, he blandly stated, “Blank point will be quite messy, won’t it?” He hummed, as though in thought, though his eyes trailed after every movement the Vernians made.
A smaller one, likely emotionally closer to the Vernian Giovanni was holding captive,  pounced.
ZZZZZT-PA! The Vernian howled, two of its 11 “arms” gone. “My threat is not idle.”
The room quieted, members of the Highlighter slowly being released.
“Thirdly.” His lips pursed, his nose tilted, sneer deadly, “Run, and pray that I never see you again!” He shot a wall, and they scattered, leaving the crew of The Highlighter mostly unscathed.
It was hours later, after the chaos was settled and the ship fixed up again, that Yatrov approached Giovanni.
“Why did you save us?”
Giovanni scrunched his thick eyebrows together, “Why ever would I not?”
“You make no attempt to communicate with us.” Yatrov insisted, trying to discover the reason Giovanni would do something without some sort of gain.
“Oh, that.” He dismissively waved his hand, his face again lax and bored. “I do not see the point in wasting words. I enjoy the presence of the crew, and- while I see no point in engaging in it- their idle chatter is amusing to listen to.” He raised an eyebrow, “Why do you ask?”
“The crew operated under the belief that you disliked us.” Yatrov felt a small bit of shame; clearly, Yatrov had been wrong to assume that all Humans were so similar.
“I-” He looked hurt, eyes filling with water- tears, they were called, and Yatrov knew that this was not a good sign. His lips twitched, his words near whispered, “Did you not consider me a friend? I thought we were.” He had begun nervously threading his fingers, humming lightly.
“I thought you disliked me.” Yatrov’s admission only increased xir’s guilt, and the slight tremors of the Humans smaller body.
“I made you and the others a new computer.” Giovanni’s eyes searched Yatrov’s one, and again found no solace. A computer did not equate to friendship. “I *made* you and the others a new computer.” The emphasis hit Yatrov. Why would one handmake something if the person receiving it did not matter to them.
“I am sorry.” Yatrov paused, xe had seen it in a Human film once, maybe…? “Can we start over?” A small nod eased Yatrov’s mind and reaffirmed xir’s decision. “I am the one known as Yatrov, and I enjoy reading: fiction, typically.” Xe did not hold out his hand, but stared Giovanni right in the eye.
The smirk on Giovanni’s face told xir that the actions- or lack there of- was not missed. “I am known as Giovanni.” He held out his hand, looking smug and slightly proud of remembering this, as their hands clasped, he said, “I enjoy sandwhiches, science, and conversations on how realistic or achievable a work of fiction can be. It will be a pleasure to work with you.”

Humans were odd, but exceptional Humans lived by a very different set of rules. Intelligence changed their perceptions. Yatrov knew, from personal experience, that they were still Human, still fantastic and horrifying, at their core. Yatrov put down the book xe was reading, looking up to watch Giovanni’s animated expressions as he ranted about machinery. Yes, truly, Humans are Weird.


(Please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes, my hand has been cramping up lately and it is hard to write at the moment. And I should not be writing sci-fi, because it is NOT my forte, but I had a plot-bunny and felt the need to attempt it. This is basically a shortened version of what I wanted to write, skipping over much of what I actually wanted to put down. Feel free to take the general idea and write something better XD )

anonymous asked:

I don't watch voltron (I plan to but haven't had the time yet), so could you please explain the sheith discourse? Idk anything about any of the characters specifically, but just based on appearances I've always liked that better than klance.

Oh my sweet summer child, I wish you well if you ever decide to brave through this fandom hell. Okay so I’ll sum this up because honestly I do not wish to talk about this discourse anymore.

Everything started shortly after the show aired on Netflix on June 10th. Due to Keith’s and Shiro’s close bond, familiarity with one another and always attempting to protect each other, they became a popular ship. So popular in fact that Josh Keaton, Shiro’s voice actor, acknowledged this on his blog and even coined the name for the ship: sheith.

It didn’t take long until he and Neil Kaplan, Zarkon’s voice actor, started mentioning sheith on their twitters as well. To top it off, Chris Palmer, who directs the show, also made this Shiro drawing with the description “Shiro loves you, baby” and tagged “he is looking at Keith.” Honestly with so many people involved with the show (even if the VAs aren’t directly involved, it was still nice) showing support for the ship, and considering Montgomery and dos Santos who previously worked on The Legend of Korra are producers in Voltron, a lot of people believe they could become canon like Korra and Asami.

Things blew up however when SDCC happened in July. Tim Hedrick, Montgomery and dos Santos who were at the event were asked by a fan about the ages of the characters, since the only clue we had was the DreamWorks’ site saying they’re teenagers. Pidge is 14, Shiro is 25 at most and everyone else is late teens.

However, many fans interpreted it as proof that Shiro is factually 25 and the other three are 17 and claim that Shiro/Paladin ships are pedophilia, wrong, incorrect and a bunch of other nasty things. They use the video as confirmation and refuse each and any other evidence to contrary, even when it comes from the same people that were in the video. Some even attack the voice actors over it, which is why Josh Keaton stopped talking about ships altogether on Twitter. The truth is, most people before and after the video saw and still see Hunk, Keith and Lance as being 18-19 and Shiro as 20-22 at most, not 25 since he doesn’t even look that old.

There is a whole lot more to this story, including but not limited to the fact that the official comic still mentions they’re five teenagers even after the SDCC event, Josh Keaton confirmed on twitter that ages were never brought up during recording and how Hedrick, Montgomery and dos Santos refuse to answer any all questions regarding the ages, and someone found a video prior to the age video where Montgomery talked about Shiro being a student, not an instructor as people against the ship kept mentioning. Recently Pidge’s voice actor also snapchatted about Shiro/Keith and Shiro/Keith/Lance. Last week it was revealed that the garrison where the paladins previously studied at is college like education and a military base as well, meaning they couldn’t be younger than 18.

Tbh the whole thing is a mess, the only thing we know for sure is that the creators themselves apparently never gave this too much thought in the first place because they wanted people to see the characters as being the age they believe them to be. And now they either refuse to talk about it anymore or contradict each other in what they have to say about it, but antis refuse to stop and continue harassing shippers and the ship tags daily with violent threats and name calling.

Incidentally, NYCC is coming up this week and the same three crew members will there. It is speculated that more fans will ask them about the ages and I’m already dreading the next wave of shitstorm coming this friday.

For more about Shiro/Paladin discussions, this post is a good post about it.

Don't be so stupid

Could you do a rough kinky Jerome smut?

——

I straighten the covers and place the money in my safe box under the bed. Another night of work. I laugh at my own statement. Ha! Work! All you do is take rejected men’s money for a wild time.

I haven’t been doing this long. Only a couple months, but I’ve made more money than you can believe!

I know how people look at me. I see the stares of shame. How some women cross the street trying to get as far away from me as possible like they might catch something.

They wouldn’t. I don’t let any man go there. Only one man has ever taken me there. Only one man I will ever let go beyond the methods I use on other men. No one has touched me since the day he was murdered.

As I scrub the filth away from my body I think back to how Jerome took me. He had different ways of making me feel head over heels. Some nights he would take me hard and rough where the bed would get close to breaking, than other nights when he was feeling love sick he would worship me. He would thrust passionately kissing my body and telling me how beautiful I am.

I step out of the shower leaving the painful memories behind. I wrap a towel around my body and go down to the kitchen to make a drink. I get out the ingredients for a rock hard drink but then a knock on the door interrupts me.

I sigh and open it to see a man with cash in hand. He raises his brow and pushes past me. Is this really my life? He throws the money at me and sits on the sofa.

I walk over to him and set the cash on the hood in his trousers. “It’s late.” I say and make my way to the door to open it for him. He laughs and throws the cash at me with force. “Suck it whore.” This man was clearly drunk and out of his mind to think he can talk to me like that.

Though financial worries enter my brain. I need the money. I need it to get away from here. I sigh and rest on my knees giving the man what he paid for.

Once done I stand up quickly and feel like I should rinse my mouth out with bleach. Just then another knock rings out. A loud one. One of demand.

I move to open the door. “I can see why you’re so popular dollface.” I grasp the handle hard and turn to him with a displeased expression. “Don’t-” “CALL HER THAT!” A screaming voice beats me to it. I know that voice.

I open the door thinking I’m crazy. I’m hearing voices again. I swing open the door to see him. “J-Jer-” he places his finger against my lips and strides into the room seeing the man. He turns to me with fire in his eyes. “Did he touch you?” I shake my head gripping my towel closer to my body scared.

Jerome comes closer and I take in his appearance. Staples? I have to say it’s not his worst look.

The man on the couch scoffs. “No. She never lets anyone get in there. To stubborn. I’ve got to say she makes up for it man. Come here and sit. She does magic.” Jerome laughs. “Oh I know. She’ll ride me like a good girl any day.” The man once again scoffs. “Ha sure! She’s not gonna let some random person in there!” The man laughs.

Jerome turns to him with a smirk. “Oh I’m not a stranger. I was her first isn’t that right darling?” He asks lifting my chin up. “Well go on baby girl. Tell him how I’m the only one who’s ever touched your pussy.” Jerome moves me in front of the man and grips my hips. “He’s the only man to ever touch my pussy.” I say feeling Jerome move his hand beyond the towel and run his fingers over the skin of my hip. I shiver under his touch missing him exceedingly.

The man on the couch slaps his knee with a jealous expression. “Oh man! Lucky you! You’re okay with her doing this though? That’s what I call a working relationship!” Jerome’s hand goes further and slips between my wet folds. He circles my clit with pressure making my body lean into his. Jerome laughs and removes his hand. Instead he lifts up the back of the towel and grips my ass. “Actually no. You see I’ve been gone for a while. This is news to me. I find this…humiliating, and revolting.” Jerome then fiddled with his own trousers and releases himself. I feel him from behind as he starts to rub his head across my wet folds. The man on the couch just stares as if he’s in heaven.

Jerome laughs. “My my my doll. You really haven’t let anyone touch you. So tight I can even thrust into you, but as for you…enjoying the snow?” Jerome thrusts hard entering me. Filling me up like he use to. I arch back into him wanting more. Needing more. The man on the couch looks at me and nods his head.

Jerome laughs and pulls out a gun. He places the barrel to my head as he continues to thrust into me pulling my hair back. “Should I shoot you? Hm? Do you deserve to live knowing the things you’ve done? You dirty whore. Who do you belong to?” “You. You Jerome!” I moan out enjoying the blissful pleasure he’s bestowing upon me. “That’s right doll! I want you to do so for me okay?” Jerome whispers in my ear. “Shoot him.” Jerome says placing the gun in my hand.

I aim the barrel at him and pull the trigger with a rush enveloping me. The mans blood splatters on the wall and he falls completely limp. Jerome growls and rips the towel away turning me around. “You’re in so much trouble.” He says and pushes me against the wall hiking me up and thrusting into me hard and fast. I place my arms around him moaning his name over and over again. “Say it again doll. Scream it.” He says and moves his hand to rub my clit. I toss my head back against the wall in pure pleasure. “Jerome!” I moan out.

He moves to sit on the couch next to the dead man still spilling blood. “What do you say princess? You wanna ride me?” I nod eagerly and place myself above him cock and sliding down on him. Jerome grips my hips as I bouch on his cock making us both feel pleasures we haven’t had for a year.

Jerome rubs his fingers against the blood on the man’s wound and covers his hand in the thick red liquid. He proceeds to trail his hand down my body making a line from my breast, to my stomach, and right above my crotch. “Ah you’re such a good girl. You’re going to cum aren’t you? Go on doll. Cum for me.” I do as he says and release on him and seconds he fills me up with his own cum.

Jerome moves my hair out of the way and kisses me. “You’re mine. Don’t be so stupid to think otherwise. No other man looks at you. Ever! Understood?” He caresses my cheek with a smile. “Yes J.” He laughs and picks me up. “Then why don’t we make up for lost time? Sound good?” I smile and kiss his nose. “Sounds perfect.”

Originally posted by bonelotus

anonymous asked:

Loving the text messages!! Keep up the good work! Also if you don't mind could you describe darks and antis personalities according to you?

Absolutely!!! Beware though, I’m about to wax poetic because I LOVE these two characters. I’m sorry that this post is so long but I’m NOT putting it under a cut because I worked on this for over a fucking hour instead of writing my history paper and I want at least one person to actually read it. :P

I’m gonna go a little in depth with what I believe is their canon personalities according to my interpretation and then how I incorporate those interpretations into Texts From Dark And Anti. Some of you may be surprised to find that I actually heavily take their canonical personalities into account when I make my edits; it’s not all just dick jokes and memes for the sake of notes. Texts From Dark And Anti is my love letter to these two characters, and I’ve gone to great lengths to portray them in the best way possible.

But enough babbling. Let’s start with Dark.

CANON PERSONALITY: Master Manipulator and Sexual Predator

Originally posted by markimemey

Per Mark, Dark is a master manipulator. He’s a snake in the grass, ready to tell you anything and everything you need to hear in order to get what he wants from you.

I’d argue that this often works for him. Obviously he’s a very good actor if he’s able to mimic Mark perfectly in the “Chocolate” ending, so that makes me think that he’s able to assume whatever personality and/or extend whatever favors he needs to to trick his victims into abiding by him.

But it’s also worth mentioning that Dark’s biggest weakness (arguably) is his jealousy. As Mark said, Dark’s extremely jealous of Mark, and he wants everything that Mark has: wealth, fame, success, and devoted fans. I’d be willing to believe that that last thing is what rubs Dark wrong the most.

Evidence? Mark’s fans are exactly what he goes after. Wanna know what’s freakier? IT FUCKING WORKED.

Mark took all of his fans out on a date. All of us adored him for it. Dark got jealous of this, so he infiltrated the date and tried to get us to support him instead. And when Tyler Mark showed up to fight him, Dark didn’t kill him himself. He manipulated us into doing it for him.

And what brings this home is that Dark has had the longest lasting potential out of anything to come out of this video. All of the other memes and references have lost their luster by now, but the resurgence of Dark-related fan art, ask/rp blogs, edits, and memes are still going strong. Dark infiltrated our date and convinced us to love him and worship him the same way that we do Mark, and we fucking fell for it.

So why does he do this? Is it just because he’s a jealous prick? Partially, but I think that, canonically, there’s more to it. I think it’s because he thrives on his ability to hold power over people, which is comparable to–get ready for it–sexual predators.

Dark exhibits a lot of the traits we normally attribute to these criminals. He’s attractive, charismatic, extremely manipulative, and sadistic. He says things like, “I can give you anything,” and, “If it’s dinner you want, I can provide.” Provide is an interesting word choice here, because that’s what society has dictated the man in a relationship should do. He even acts seductive: arching his neck, eye-fucking the camera, and he even blows us a kiss (see below). But the way that he grabs and shakes us periodically throughout his mental breakdown betrays his inner sadism and anger issues, also common among sexual predators. I absolutely think that based on Dark’s behavior and what we know about him, he’s totally down to fuck anyone and everyone in order to get what he wants–consensual or otherwise. And I definitely think he’ll enjoy it.

Originally posted by mirrorthehorse

I wouldn’t necessarily say that Dark is a nymphomaniac. As an otherworldly being, it’s entirely possible he doesn’t even have a sex drive. But sexual predators don’t usually rape their victims just to get their dicks wet. Usually, it’s a power issue; they want to feel like they have mastery over something, and that they are dominant and in control. Given Dark’s obsession with taking all of Mark’s glory away from him, coupled with his violent mood swings and sadism, I would say that sexual assault is probably just one of the many ways he appeases his insatiable appetite for power and manipulation. And I’d even bet that it’s one of his go-to’s.

In Texts From Dark And Anti, I normally portray Dark as a bitter old demon who doesn’t understand memes and doesn’t want to put up with anybody’s shit. But I didn’t just do this for fun; I did it because I could see Dark being jaded in real life. Off-camera, when he’s not trying to seduce us into adoring him over Mark, I could see him being sick of being overlooked. He’s old, even by Mark’s channel’s standards, and up until “A Date With Markiplier”, he wasn’t mainstream in the fandom at all–not fun for someone who craves the adoration of others. So he’d definitely be off-put by Anti’s much younger, more erratic personality, and in a bad mood he’d bitch at him for it. But in a good mood, he’d use it to his advantage to get whatever he wants–sex, souls, and anything else his blackened heart desires, both for the reward and the thrill of not having to do it himself.

Now let’s talk about Anti.

CANON PERSONALITY: Chaotic Psychopath

Originally posted by treblegirl

Jack has been near-silent on his personal interpretation of Anti (although he’s stated that he definitely has a personal canon that he refuses to share, the little fucker), so all of this is going to come from speculation and what we see onscreen.

While Dark chose to make his debut in one long, continuous, elegant appearance, Anti showed up randomly throughout the month of October, with no prelude and no explanation as to why he was there. Also in contrast to Dark’s smooth, charismatic personality, Anti is visibly unstable, jittery, and psychotic. Both he and Dark exhibit bloodlust, but Anti doesn’t hide it. He doesn’t hold back any of his sociopathic tendencies, going so far as to murder his host on camera for the world to see.

We don’t exactly know what Anti’s agenda is, but that’s just it: I don’t think he has one. At least, not one beyond the psychotic urge to kill as much and as many people as he can. Even in “Say Goodbye”, all he does is laugh at/condemn the viewer for not warning Jack and saving him. The other times he was on camera in October, he was glitchy, with several different appearances (fangs, gauges, blood, etc.) and contorted, unsettling body movements, making me think that Anti is a supernatural being that thrives on chaos and bloodshed.

But  Anti doesn’t just want to cause havoc–he wants to cause havoc and get the credit he deserves for it. That’s why he showed up so much on camera without Jack noticing; he was there for us, not him. Then he made a big deal about us not telling Jack what was going on, condemning us for our failure to make his existence well-known. Then he crashed Jack’s panel at PAX, angry at us for “forgetting” him. He’s not trying to garner our support like Dark is; if anything, he wants us to be terrified of him.

Originally posted by redthereaper07

But personally, if I had to choose between being locked in a room with Dark and being locked in a room with Anti, I’d choose Anti in a heartbeat. Because even though Anti is more obviously psychotic, at least I’d know I would be killed quickly–unlike Dark, who would torture and manipulate me verbally, physically, and possibly even sexually for an indeterminate amount of time. This is Anti’s downfall, I think; Dark disguises his true nature with seduction and charisma, but because Anti’s so unpredictable and surface-level, he identifies himself as a very obvious threat, ironically making him a little easier to understand.

Thus, my interpretation of him in Texts From Dark And Anti reflects this (albeit in a more comedic way). Anti loves memes and silly trends because he wants to stick out in a way that’ll gain recognition. He’s more up-to-date with Internet trends and slang because he’s much younger than Dark–but that also means that he’s more gullible, and a lot of simple things go over his head. Basically all of his emotions are double that of Dark’s, and he makes no efforts to disguise them. He’s also much more privvy to senseless murder than Dark. This speaks highly of his psychotic tendencies and general disregard for any order or secrets he could be bothering to keep. What you see of Anti is what you get: an easily-excitable, always-ready-to-fuck-shit-up killing machine.

Originally posted by markired

So…yeah. That’s pretty much my piece. Told you it’d be long. X’D

But tysm for asking!! And if any of you bothered reading this far, PLEASE reblog or leave a reply with your thoughts on my interpretation of these two characters and how you characterize them personally. I’m super crazy interested in the lore around these two (or lack thereof), which is why I created Texts From Dark And Anti in the first place. ^_^

Don't make my girlfriend cry.

(warning: long story)

Okay, so this was a good few years ago, back when I was in high school.

In case my username didn’t give it away, I am happily and openly gay af, and I came out at about 14, around year 9 in highschool (I’m British). And from that second on, I was even more of a target.

I was already the preferred bullying target. The school was aware of it, they were also aware that my family didn’t take kindly to this (in my previous school, my Mum had brought the police into school on the day where the younger kids were coming to see if they wanted to go there, because they weren’t doing anything about me being bullied) so pulled a big huff and puff smoke screen to try and make it seem like they were fixing the issue, though they never did anything.

I had plenty of small ‘regular’ or 'petty’ revenges throughout my years. Getting people kicked out of classes, forced into counselling, etc etc. But this is the big one.

Keep reading

blindiemac  asked:

So I've been thinking about the retirement au a lot today (work has been slow...) and I was thinking. Yuuri strikes me as the kind of man not to talk about his accomplishments, but he will gush about his friends. Like, "My friend Phichit just won Gold at the Four Continents!" "Chris was so good at the European Championships!" "My unofficial son Yurio just won at Worlds!" things like that. I imagine him talking about these things, but like his friends don't know he really knows these (cont.)

(Cont.) people. Like they think the beautiful, untouchable, hot Yuri Katsuki-Nikiforov is just like a massive fanboy for figure skating (which, true he is, but he’s also been known as Japan’s Ace so…) and think it is just a cute little character quirk that makes him even more adorable. After all, his friends are not into skating so they have no idea who these people are. They do however know Yuuri is gay (or at least bi) because he regularly refers to this guy Viktor as his husband (apparently he’s some big shot figure skater that Yuuri has the cutest little (massive) crush on, can you even believe how cute this guy is?). But Yuuri isn’t really married because he would wear a ring on his left finger if he was, like come on. It all comes to a head like it does in your retirement au by Yuuri being recognized by fans, with some added hilarity of “I talk about my figure skating friends all the time?" 

"We thought you were just a really big fan!" 

"I talk about my husband all the time?" 

"Yeah and Jenny talks about her rock star "wife” all the time too!“ 

"wait, you’re not really married?" 

Bc of course Yuuri would not find it weird to be married to a rock star. He married Viktor Nikiforov after all. (fin.) 

*Dead*

HOLY SHIT THIS IS BEAUTIFUL????

And completely and utterly plausible omg. Because that is literally exactly the kind of language we use here on tumblr XDD Even I call my favs as my sons or daughters, or how I call JJ as the king of my heart.

Wowow, okay, so the only plot hole in this au has been filled, we finally have a good explanation for why Yuuri’s friends don’t know he’s married!!! This is totally canon…in my headcanon XD

But then also can you imagine when his friends do finally find out that the person Yuuri has been calling his husband all this time is actually his husband, they insist on getting to meet him.

Except maybe that week Skate America is going on or whatever.

So all these famous skaters are in the US, and Otabek’s competing too. And Yura wants to spend some time with the bff, so Yuuri and Viktor decide to have a house party after the competition is over.

And Yuuri’s college friends are invited over.

And they get there, and they just kinda stare around at everyone like OAO

Because they’re all lowkey terrified and highkey intimidated because???? This party is basically a who’s who of the figure skating world??? Their little Yuuri knows and is comfortable with so many celebrities? Their little Yuuri IS a celebrity!!!!! This is more famous people than they’d ever thought they’d meet in one place!!!

But before the night is over, they’ve loosened up and gotten to know the skaters. Chris is probably missing his pants. Yuuri has a bottle or two of champagne in him (nevermind the fact that those two bottles probably cost more than any of his friends make in a month). And you know Phichit has told a very attentive crowd the full story of how Viktor and Yuuri met, in detail. Never mind the fact that Phichit wasn’t even at that banquet in the first place, and he himself had gotten the story, heavily embellished, from Chris.

🎶🎶When You Collect Records🎶🎶
  • Hipster: *moves dusty old boxes out of the way* Whoa, an old record player. It looks like it's in working order too! *runs outside*
  • Hipster: Yo, dad!
  • Dad: What?
  • Hipster: We're getting rid of all of poppop's stuff, right?
  • Dad: There's something you want, isn't there?
  • Hipster: There's this old stereo record player in the attic.
  • Dad: What do you need a record player for?
  • Hipster: My record collection.
  • Dad: I didn't even know they still made those things. Can't you just listen to music on your phone?
  • Hipster: Dad, there's a big difference between listening to music digitally and on record.
  • Dad: Fine, I don't wanna get into it with you right now. You can take the record player. You just have to get someone else to take it to your place for you. My truck's full.
  • Hipster: Thanks dad! *smooches dad on the cheek*
  • *later at hipster's apartment*
  • Friend: So, like Patch Adams ends with Patch Adams half-naked in front of a ton of people. I don't know if it was meant to be funny or like a weird sex thing, but like the movie was just a deeply disturbing character study. I can't stop thinking about it.
  • Hipster: That sounds boring. *unlocks door to apartment* Ta-da! Here it is! My new record player!
  • Friend: New? Looks fucking old to me, dude.
  • Hipster: Well, it is old. That's the appeal. And we're going to listen to the new Sufjan record on it.
  • Friend: Is that actually how you say Sufjan? Apparently, I've been pronouncing it wrong this whole time.
  • Hipster: Well, you won't after this record. There's an entire track where he just says his name for four minutes. It's amazing. *plays records*
  • Record Player: *coughs* Hello. Hello! Where am I? Doctor? Hello! Why is it so dark...............................Can I breathe? I can't breath. Oh god, I'm not breathing! Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god! I.....................................
  • Hipster: Uh, that's not Sufjan.
  • Friend: It totally isn't. Is it some guest vocalist? I like the new direction he's going in. No instruments or singing, and long stretches of silence. Very experimental.
  • Hipster: *stops record player* I think maybe we should do something else for now.
  • Friend: Fucking lame! I wanted to listen to more Sufjan.
  • *days later at the record store*
  • Hipster: Yo, I think the Sufjan Stevens record I bought from here might be some kind of mispress.
  • Store Clerk: Really? It's a pretty major album. I doubt there'd just be a mispress like that.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but listen to it. It's not Sufjan at all. It's some girl talking.
  • *hipster and clerk listen to a completely normal Sufjan Stevens album together*
  • Store Clerk: What are you talking about? This is definitely Sufjan Stevens.
  • Hipster: Okay, but it wasn't like that when I listened to it at home! I even listened to it with my friend and he heard the same thing!
  • Store Clerk: Maybe there's something wrong with your record player.
  • Hipster: Hmm, maybe there is.
  • *back at the apartment*
  • Hipster: *turns on record player and just listens*
  • Record Player: ...I'm awake again. Why did I black out? Did I even black out? God, I'm not breathing, but it doesn't matter. Why don't I need to breathe? Am I even alive?
  • Hipster: Can you hear me?
  • Record Player: Doctor. Doctor! DOCTOR! Why can't I move? Why can't I feel anything. Keep yourself together. It'll all make sense soon. Calm down. Just breathe deeply. Fuck, I can't breathe! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I CAN'T BREATHE! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! HELP! HELP ME, PLEASE! I'M STUCK! I CAN'T MOVE! PLEASE HELP ME!
  • Hipster: *turns off record player* It's just a recording, I bet. I can't believe I talked to it like an idiot... *nervously turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: I blacked out again. I blacked out. For how long? Is there even time here? Hell. This is hell, right? Did I go to hell.........................................
  • Hipster: *listens to the record player for hours*
  • Record Player: Negative 6893 bottles of wine on the wall! Negative 6893 bottles of wine! Take one down, pass it around, Negative 6894 bottles of wine on the wall... fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
  • Hipster: *keeps listening*
  • Record Player: Soul of Christ, make me holy, Body of Christ, be my salvation. God, please forgive me. I'm sorry for all of my sins. Please free me. I'm so sorry. Please. Please. Please.
  • Hipster: *still listening*
  • Record Player: FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! SHITTY DOCTOR! FUCK YOU! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! *sobs intensely* FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK EVERYTHING! Please just let me go.
  • Hipster: *nervously walks up to record player and lightly taps on it*
  • Record Player: ...A knock. A KNOCK! PLEASE HELP ME! I'M STUCK! PLEASE! *record player begins shake violently*
  • Hipster: *backs away in fear*
  • Record Player: HELP! HELP! HELP ME! PLEASE, IF SOMEONE'S THERE, HELP ME! HELP ME! I'M STUCK! GET ME OUT OF HERE, PLEASE!
  • Hipster: *unplugs record player*
  • Hipster: *gets hammer from the closet and begins to break apart record player*
  • Record Player: *drips red*
  • Hipster: W-What? *cracks front of record player open*
  • *rotting viscera falls from the record player*
  • Hipster: O-Oh... *stuffs viscera back into the record player and duct tapes over it*
  • Hipster: *turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: ...I can feel. It hurts. Why does it hurt now? Why does it hurt? Why? Why? Why? WHY!? WHY!? WHY!? *spurts blood through it speakers and begins to gurgle*
  • Record Player: *hops forward* Please just let me go. Please... please. I'll do anything. I just want to see you again. I'm so sorry. This isn't what I asked for. I'm so sorry. *hops forward again and comes unplugged*
  • Record Player: *tips over, bleeding heavily onto the carpet*
  • Hipster: *silently cleans up the mess*
  • *some time later*
  • Hipster: *calls dad* Hey, dad. Oh, nothing. Uh, I just need to borrow your truck, If not tonight sometime this week. I just need to get rid of something. No, no, that's fine, I can do it myself. Yeah, tomorrow morning is perfect. Thanks Love you too. Bye.
  • *the next afternoon*
  • Dad: So, what did you need to get rid of this morning?
  • Hipster: Nothing important. Just some old junk... Dad, what kind of person was poppop?
  • Dad: Well, he was only the greatest man I've known in my life. Really caring, dedicated to his family. When you were born he loved you so much. He was a bit of a loner, though. It took a lot to get him to open up. Even around me and your grandmother. He was a bit like you. Always a huge music lover.
  • Hipster: I see. Was he ever a doctor?
  • Dad: That's a weird thing to ask. Nope. He hated doctors. Didn't trust modern medicine one bit. It's ironic. His cancer probably wouldn't have gotten to him if he did. But, your poppop was always so stubborn.
  • Hipster: Oh, okay then.
  • *some days later*
  • Friend: New carpet?
  • Hipster: Yup, old one was ugly wasn't it. It was time for a change.
  • Friend: That's what I've been telling you! I'm glad you finally came to your senses. What happened to your record player, though?
  • Hipster: That thing? I threw it away. It was busted.
  • Friend: That sucks. Are you gonna buy a new one?
  • Hipster: No.
  • Friend: But you won't have anything to play your records on.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but I buy records because I want to support the artists. They're not really for listening. Besides, lossless is better. FLAC is the future.

anonymous asked:

the gay kiss in svtfoe is like 1 sec long i wish you guys would stop gaslighting people with this being good rep when the entire second season is given over to a completely unnecessary supposedly heterosexual love triangle, because they won't ever canonize marco as a girl. like seriously. pretending this is great rep has consequences, it alienates fans and it tells disney and other corporations they can throw us scraps and that they don't need to try to get our pink dollars. Stop.

Okay.

First of all, I can do whatever I want. Second of all, I can do whatever I want. And third, I can do whatever I want.

Okay? Glad we established that. With that out of the way, I’m gonna be very clear with people like you who keep telling me and other people like what we should want, need and demand. 

Star has done a lot in terms of destroying gender roles and other stereotypes and taboos for kids and young people out there. Its characters are not flat and they have their own personalities, their own lives and agency, which don’t conform to gender norms as they have been force-fed to us by society. Breaking this kind of stereotypes is gonna be so liberating for so many kids. For example:

  • You don’t have to be girly to be a girl (Janna is into a lot of creepy and icky stuff usually considered boyish, just to mention someone)
  • Being feminine doesn’t define your gender (Marco, and I’m gonna get back to you on this)
  • Having trouble managing your anger does not make you a bad person (Tom. who is working so hard to keep it under control and improve because he wants to be better)
  • You can have a bunch of mixed, apparently contradicting traits, and that doesn’t make you less worthy of the gender you identify with (Star is very girly and likes cute stuff but still kicks ass and loves every second of it)
  • Boys can be affectionate with other boys (if we assume, based on what we know at the moment, that Marco identifies as a boy, and again, I’ll get back to you on that), and that’s okay (Marco and Tom, even though I still think the whole Friendenemies episode was very homoerotic)

Originally posted by mettatonexox

I’m really grateful for this new wave of cartoons (such as Star vs The Forces of Evil, Gravity Falls or Steven Universe). Different shows are exploring different themes from different angles, and that doesn’t mean that one is necessarily above the other. Star may not be exploring queerness in full (like Steven Universe does, for example), more like touching upon its surface, but it is still playing a role in its normalisation.

Never did I say that the infamous 1-second gay kiss was good rep. For me to call it rep, I would need it to feature at least characters whose names we know. But you know what? I’m okay with it being something in the background and I don’t consider it gaslighting, because as far as I know, the show did not make a big deal out of it, they did not announce “Hey! We are giving you guys gay rep! Look at all the diversity we’re including!”. I actually heard nothing from the show-runners. It was the media that blew up and made a huge deal out of it because of some stupid parents’ reaction. The whole thing was a nice detail that acknowledged the existence of gay people and made an effort to normalise queerness by showing them doing something as mundane as going to a concert with their partners. Period.

And on that note, I want to add that yes, more than this is desirable and it’s okay (it’s very important, actually!) to ask for proper representation. But we can’t close our eyes to the stuff that’s already come our way just because it’s not as much as we wanted it to be. Things take time. Society is still coming to terms with LGBT+ people, and rushing them is only gonna make them clam up and reject any notion of it. Hell, parents wanted to take Star out of Disney XD because they were outraged by a 1-sec cartoon gay kiss! Even though I’m tired of waiting, I see that Disney is treading on thin ice with its more conservative audience and has to carefully plan its every step. And they are still making progress. Slowly, but surely.

We got Beauty and the Beast with gay LeFou (even though I still think it should have been the clock and the candelabra), despite the foreseeable boicot from many people. I’m not saying “we’re good, we can stop demanding stuff from show-runners and movie directors”, I’m saying, “let’s appreciate the progress we’re making while aiming for more”. We’ve come a long way since Disney’s massive no-homo when High School Musical gave a girlfriend to Ryan, literally the gayest man alive in the Disney Universe.

And about the “unnecessary heterosexual love triangle”: I dunno, anon, I’m a storyteller and I saw it coming for a long time. The show built up to that point. It’s not like they pulled it out of their asses. Would I have wanted it to be a love square featuring Tom? Why yes, absolutely, but oh well. It still makes sense in the story they’re telling and it’s integrated in the plot. It would have been weird if Marco, who had been crushing on Jackie since Day 1, had just moved on from her without thinking twice.

Originally posted by cosmicstimmer

Now, about Trans!Marco: I’m gonna be very honest with how I view it, and I’ll also let you know that I’m transgender myself (non-binary pal here, hey, how are ya), as well as a transgender rights activist and lecturer, so I know what I’m talking about. I have nothing against the Trans!Marco fannon, obviously. I think some seed has been planted in the show and as of now, people can make of it what they will. I’d be thrilled and on board if there were any confirmation from TPTB. But I’m not taking it as anymore than that for now, and I’ll entertain both Trans!Marco and Cis!Marco notions. Why?

Yes, Marco has been shown as Princess Marco several times already, pronouns have been changed to feminine and nobody has questioned Marco’s new status during those times. However, Marco hasn’t expressed a particular preference for being treated as a girl (true, no preference for masculine treatment has been expressed either, so we’re kind of in a neutral zone I guess?). I mean, you see Marco wearing dresses and a wig with no complain, as well as being treated as a girl, but after that episode is over, you don’t really see Marco displaying any signs of discomfort with gender identity or pronouns or disphoria or gender expression or anything like that. Actually, the character’s development continues as it was before that happened (anybody else remembers that episode where Marco lives on a different dimension for 16 years and embraces every masculinity trope under the sun?). 

Originally posted by soyalexnajera

Now I’m not saying you have to meet a bunch of requirements to be trans (I’m no trans gatekeeper), but these are the kind of things that usually give it away when we’re talking about someone else’s experience, since we are not inside their head. 

Yes, Marco does possess some traits traditionally associated with femininity (like spending hours getting ready for the date with Jackie), but they’re vague enough that they could mean something or nothing at all (like I said, the show does a lot to destroy gender roles). I feel like I can’t really call it for sure based on that. With how indifferent Marco seems to be to different pronouns, I’d actually say that there’s higher chances this character falls somewhere in the non-binary spectrum, rather than identifying as a girl. This is, of course, my personal opinion, and I might be wrong. But it goes to show that the hinting done in the show has been so subtle for now that it could go either way, and so, I fail to see why we should get angry that Marco isn’t being treated as a girl at the moment.

Just my two cents.

Tastes Like Strawberry

Plot (Requested): Just some smut Draco x Reader.

Warnings: My first smut, sorry if it is bad. SMUT: Oral sex (female receiving), kind of public sex. Let me know if you guys want a part 2!

Word Count: 1.015.

Author’s Note: English is not my first language, so if there are mistakes I’m sorry. Message me and I’ll correct them. Also, thanks for almost 2K followers. You guys are making me really happy. My classes has just started, so I won’t be posting a lot. Sorry about that, but don’t give up on me!

Originally posted by tearswillalwaysfall

Originally posted by moan-s

The hallways were empty, what was quite useful for me and Draco. It was late, and we sneaked out our dormitories to hang out since none of us wanted to sleep. We ended up in the astronomy tower, the cold fresh air sending goosebumps up and down my spine.

“The sky is beautiful…” I said, looking up to the constellations.

“Not as much as you are.” Draco whispered in my ear and kissed my neck, hugging me from behind. I smiled at his silly complement and felt his arms pulling me more into him.

“That’s why you brought me here? So we could be alone and no one would listen if I screamed for help?” I asked, turning around to look in his Grey eyes.

“Believe me, Princess, if I was in intent to make you scream, it would be for more, not for help.”  He smiled sassy and kissed me. In that very moment it was like the whole world has vanished, and there was just the two of us, and I knew he felt that too. Being with Draco makes me feel good with myself and with life. I guess that’s what love means: to feel complete.

We were still kissing (who needs oxygen right?) when I heard an owl. I looked at the side of the tower’s balcony and saw Storm, my owl, with a package. I leaved Draco and walked to her, getting the small box from her hands and reading the note from my mom:

My dear, your idea for our garden worked. I’m sending the results. Miss you.

                                                                                                                              - Mom.

Curious, I opened the box to find it filled with strawberries, my favorite fruit of all. I smiled and felt Draco approaching me, trying to see what was it I had received. “I think I just found us something really good to do.” I said.

“Com’ sit here then.” He said, sitting in the ground and tapping his lap. I rolled my eyes and went to him. Although I would never confess, I loved when he was kinda bossy like that. It was just… Hot. There are not other words to describe it. I sat on his lap and got one of the strawberries from the box, handing it to him. When he went to grab it with his mouth I ate it. “Really Princess, you’re going to play this game with me?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I said, innocently and grabbed another fruit. This time, I actually did teased him, eating that thing in the most sexy and insinuating way I could. I don’t think that looked like I pictured, but Draco seemed quite turned on, so I didn’t mind at all. “I’m just eating.”

“I’m going to ‘just eat you’ out any of these days.” He said seriously enough for me to believe. I knew he was messing with me back, because his words affected me like no one’s else could, but I wouldn’t loose, not this time.

“I bet I taste better than this things…” I said, biting another strawberry.

“I bet on that too.” He said, using one of his arms to position me better on his lap. “Actually, I know you taste away much better then these.” He said, kissing my neck softly and running one of his hands through my leg, dangerously close to my pussy. “In fact, I wouldn’t mind tasting you right now.” With that I felt his hand slipping inside my pants. His fingers teased me and I moaned. “Merlin’s sake, Princess. I haven’t done anything and you’re already this wet?”

I knew he was smiling victorious, but I couldn’t care less.

“Draco… Please…”

Say it once more, Baby Girl. You know how much I love it when you beg.” He took the box of strawberries from my hand with his free one and putted it aside as he kept teasing me. I moaned again, and heard him laugh. “Just ask Princess. That’s all you have to do.” He whispered, biting my ear lobe.

“Fuck me.” I begged.

“As you wish, my love.” His fingers found my clit, pressing it gently and earning a loud moan from me. “Be quite, Princess, or you’re not winning anything.” I bit my lip, trying to focus on staying shut, but it was quite hard when Draco’s fingers slowly started bumping on me. I felt myself getting closer as his rhythm speeds up, and when I was at the age he took his hand off me, leaving me feeling empty.

“What the fuck Draco…”

“I said I wanted to taste you, darling. That’s exactly what I’m going to do. I just need a better place…” He held my waist and apparated us to an empty classroom. “This will do it.” He said, trowing me upon the table and laying me down.

“What if someone cough us?” I asked, nervous.

“Be quite and no one will.” He said, smiling as he knew he was going to make it really difficult for me. He positioned his self between my legs, pulled my pants off and started kissing my thighs, slowly coming up. “You smell good. Fuck, how’s that even possible?” He whispered for himself and got to my panties, sliding them down and taking them off me. I was starting to get impatience when I felt him kiss me gently, just to get rough right after, sucking on my clit. I had to bit my lip to the point of it almost bleeding so I could be kept shut. He smirked and inserted two fingers inside me, thrusting fast.

“Draco… Fuck… I’m going to…” I tried to not scream his name.

“Come for Daddy Princess.” That nickname was all I needed to cum hard. Draco licked me up and then helped me sitting on the table. I tried to catch my breath and he smiled, probably proud of the good job he has done. “As I said. Better then strawberry.”

I laughed. How could he go from such a Sex God to a jerk, I’d never understand. But Merlin’s sake, I loved it.

mcartist  asked:

Since it's Valentine's Day.(Have the RFA+V+Searan) I would love to ask if you could do MC and her brother spending Valentines together. The others couldn't spend time cause they were busy. So once they have some time to spare them look for you and see you are your brother hanging out. Yet you are siblings so you sorta close to each other and some things seem romantic. The others don't know you have a brother. So how would they react? If you can't do it, it's okay. Happy Valentine's Day!

OOooh scandalous~ 
(It’s the day after Valentine’s Day here because I live in Australia and we live in the future but I’d be happy do do this!)

Yoosung: 

✮ he was busy with some huge LOLOL event that was happening for valentine’s 
✮ he felt bad but you assured him that it was fine and you would just go see family or a friend or whatever 
✮ so when he leaves the house to get food and sees you with some guy??
✮ YANDERE YOOSUNG UNLEASHED 
✮ your brother was teasing you by pulling and twisting your hair 
✮ but to yoosung it looked like he was hella flirting 
✮ basically stomps up and flicks your brother’s hand away 
✮ ‘excuse me, why are you touching my girlfriend? huh?’ 
where did this confidence come from hmmmm
✮ your brother is confused because ‘omg is this the innocent yoosung MC was talking about???’
✮ you’re trying not to fall over from laughing 
✮ your brother looks absolutely horrified 
✮ “MC is mY siStEr! who are you, huh punk?’ 
✮ yoosung.exe has stopped working
✮ almost cries
✮ apologises 38918475 times he feels so bad 
✮ is pouting for the rest of the day and puts the LOLOL event on the back burner 

Jaehee: 

✎ she told you beforehand that valentine’s was going to be probably the busiest day for the cafe 
✎ but W O W 
✎ the cafe was packed and you hardly got to see jaehee 
✎ and your brother visited during your lunch break 
✎ so you two were just standing in a corner, trying to leave as much room for the actual customers that you could 
✎ things died down for a total of maybe five minutes 
✎ and jaehee looked around to find you and saw your brother squishing your cheeks together while you both laughed 
✎ she really wanted to go over there and judo kick someone’s ass but she still had customers 
✎ she was kinda angry for the rest of the day 
✎ until afterwards you walk up with your brother and introduce them 
✎ her face is redder than saeyoung’s hair 
✎ she refuses to admit anything 
✎ except when you’re back home she’s super affectionate 
✎ and at first you think it’s just valentine’s day love 
✎ but she’s super clingy and kind sheepish 
✎ so you ask what the deal is 
✎ and she begrudgingly admits that she saw you and your brother when you were messing around and didn’t realise it was your brother
✎ you have to try and maintain the giggles because she’s obviously embarrassed
✎ cute baehee 

Zen:

✿ he was really busy rehearsing an upcoming musical 
✿ and the director was super strict and wasn’t letting anyone out for the day 
✿ during one of the breaks he picked up his phone and noticed that his fans were all tagging him in the same thing
✿ and he went to it and it’s a picture of you with some guy?!?!?!?!
✿ and he’s so scandalised 
✿ he immediately goes to the group chat and sees that you and saeyoung are online
✿ he basically spams the picture with multiple exclamations akin to ‘WTF MC’ 
✿ you’re freaking out because he’s just sending mindless messages now and won’t stop to listen 
✿ and saeyoung is just off his chair laughing because he obviously knows who it is (background check) 
✿ you send a selfie of you and your brother both with a ‘wtf’ face and the ‘boi’ hand at the camera 
✿ and zen finally stops 
✿ you send another picture but this one’s of you and your brother when you were babies 
✿ ‘hyun, this is my brother’ 
✿ ‘nice to meet THE zen’
✿ he’s so flustered 
✿ he sends sorry to the chat so many times that the original problem can’t even be found 
✿ when he comes home that night he brings a big bouquet of flowers and your favourite snacks 
✿ is super clingy 

Jumin: 

₩ this nugget just doesn’t believe in valentine’s day 
₩ you’d told him how annoyed this makes you but he didn’t seem to care too much 
₩ so he was at work 
₩ you went to lunch at the cafe thing across from the C&R building because your brother was curious 
₩ y’all were just chilling, eating pastries and drinking milkshakes 
₩ and then jaehee came for her lunch break 
plot twist
₩ you say hi and your brother introduces himself (but not as your brother) 
₩ and she’s shook 
₩ she goes back and asks jumin if he knew you were at the cafe with some guy
₩ JUMIN IS JUST AS SHOOK 
₩ he glides down and stands at your table 
₩ you really nonchalantly say hello 
₩ he’s so confused 
₩ ‘would you like to explain yourself MC?’ 
₩ ???? ‘jumin what are you talking about? i’m just having lunch with my brother, we’re waiting for his girlfriend to come’ 
₩ it’s like you can see him deflate in embarrassment 
₩ he like flops down in the seat next to you 
₩ meets your brother 
₩ when you’re back at home you ask him why he was so salty at the start and he admitted that he thought you were on a date with some random guy because he wouldn’t celebrate valentine’s 
₩ you laugh and say you wouldn’t do that and shower him in affection
he made up for it ;)

Seven/Saeyoung:

⌨  he probably knows what your brother looks like from the background check but for the sake of story let’s just pretend he didn’t go that deep into your history 
⌨  he was super busy with work-related stuff and didn’t even realise it was valentine’s
⌨  he asked you to grab some groceries because he couldn’t
⌨  he’d noticed you’d been gone for a while so he hacked into the security cameras of and around the grocery store
⌨  saw you talking to some guy
⌨  he’s so confused because you haven’t just stopped for a little ‘oh hi I know you’ obligatory hello but you’re walking down the sidewalk with the store bags and talking
⌨  he sees him nudge you with his shoulder and he’s kinda pissed
⌨  he just waits until you’re back home. you’re alone 
⌨  he tries to act nonchalant about it, and like he doesn’t know anything– waiting until you bring it up 
⌨  it’s the end of the day and he crawls into the bed where you already are 
⌨  you bring up how it’s valentine’s day and that you missed him 
⌨  he feels guilty but he’s kinda frustrated from before and goes ‘it didn’t look like you missed me too much while walking down the street with some other guy’ 
⌨  he did not get the reaction he expected 
⌨  he expected you to be kinda shocked like ‘:o caught’ 
⌨  but you’re giggling and snorting 
⌨  ‘saeyoung… that was my brother; we ran into each other outside a store so he walked with me for a little while’ 
⌨  like jumin, he deflates 
⌨  he feels S O  B A D 
⌨  he gives you so many cuddles and just fully wraps himself around you 
⌨  swears he’ll make it up to you 
⌨  he definitely does 


I hope you all had a happy valentine’s day! CHEAP CHOCOLATE AND MYSTIC MESSENGER DLC’S WOOO ♡♡♡♡

12x22: Dean Winchester is going to die

Well, when I was new, I wrote a whole post about this, about how early episodes but especially 12x11 foreshadowed that Performing!Dean was going to be deconstructed by the end of the season… Fans self.

The death of Performing!Dean in this episode was BEAUTIFUL. It was EXQUISITE. I couldn’t have asked for MORE! 

I literally grabbed and punched @amwritingmeta in the leg I don't know how many times as I paused it to point and shout.

1. The Grenade Launcher

So, the grenade launcher = performing!Dean metaphor. We had hoped and boy did they deliver! Did anyone else notice, while Dean was *ahem* knocking down the seemingly unpenetrable physical walls, that, maybe it was my weird link, but it seemed to me that the flashing ‘red’ lights in the MoL bunker were decidedly pinky-purpley in colour rather than standard alarm bells red and the flashlights glowed on the blue side of white… (the MoL HQ lights are also brightly pinky-purple to keep the theme going, I mean honestly what self respecting 1950s MoL guy chose this for the bunker instead of the usual red? Please!) Just saying. 

Originally posted by ohh-bloodyhell

“It wasn’t long ago I thought we had it made. We had Cas back, we had mom back. I mean it wasn’t perfect but still…”.  This is it. Dean’s facade has been coming down all season, but at this point now, he just doesn’t see the point in holding it up anymore.

And what does Sam do? HE OPENS UP TO DEAN. He tells Dean how he feels, the reasons why he followed the MoL - that it was “easier than leading”, that he made a mistake. This enables Dean to be truthful himself, in the end, now. Again, they have had many times to reflect on their own deaths but this is another time similar to 11x23 where he can really reflect on what he has lost, and now what is that? Cas and Mary.

Dean uses the grenade launcher, that he’s been dying to do since forever, blows down the impenetrable seeming wall, saves the day. How meta do we need to go? It’s BLATANT. The choice in the colour of the lights, the dialogue, his feelings… the walls are Dean’s facade and the grenade launcher is his way of breaking it down. YES. This has been building all season and much prior to this other meta writers have said that he grenade launcher is associated with Dean’s hidden side, his bisexuality, Destiel etc… this is meta gold, THIS is a meta aspect Dabb was talking about. Toni even then parallels the tearing down of Mary’s mental wall with Dean’s physical use of the grenade launcher, just moments after. It is so well put together :D

Also, I have long believed that the bunker had to go. It represents too much the MoL side of things and the whole ‘living below ground’ thing is way too underground / metaphorically bad. For me they need a real, healthy home which is in between Bobby’s hunter house and the MoL bunker. Hopefully they will find a nice modern MoL home with kit but that isn’t so hidden above ground somewhere next season to take over and make their own :D

2. Sam the MoL leader

“Real hunting isn’t just about killing, it’s about doing whats right… I want you to follow me”. We have wanted this for Sam all season, the MoL story fits his personal arc so well (so did Eileen, still bitter), this is Sam’s endgame. Sam said just moments earlier that he didn’t want to lead, but now he is, because it is necessary and because he is good at it. I believe he will now see that this is what he wants and will work towards this for his endgame.

This then leads to…

3. Dean and Sam - ending the brodependency and Dean as Sam’s parent

Dean lets Sam go, the dialogue is amazing. “You’re ready for this… you got this” paralleled with an actual mom/daughter conversation between Jody and Alex. 

Originally posted by bridget-malfoy-stilinski-hale

Dean literally talks to Sam like a parent letting their child go off to college and I had to pause this for a long long moment to process and scream “they’re actually going there!” not even knowing what was coming next… man…

Then comes the Mary / Dean scene.

4. Dean and Mary

This was always going to be what Mary led to for Dean’s arc. After Amara had started this addressing of Dean’s facade in season 11 and Mary is basically an extension of Amara this season re: Dean (in the same way that she still has to influence Sam’s arc re: Lucifer, that is for next season). I LOVED how BLATANT and textual they made this, the actual lack of subtext because it was all in the ACTUAL TEXT! 

Firstly, Dean considers letting Toni go, which I had expected, to show the difference between our boys (morality) and the MoL as monsters.

Then… “Dad was just a shell…I had to be a father and a mother to keep him safe, and that wasnt fair, and I couldnt do it, and you wanna know what that was like? They killed the girl that he loved, he got possessed by Lucifer, they tortured him in hell and he lost his soul…But I forgive you, for everything.” MY HEART!

Ok, yeah, they did the thing, they brought Jess up 30 mins before killing the guy that Dean loves after not mentioning her for…. A DECADE? And paralleling one of the few scenes we ever saw her in with Dean/Cas too? After we already had the parallel with Dean seeing Cas when driving along, same as Sam did? So, only the scene of Sam and Jess in the bar and the scene where Dean actually meets her haven’t been paralleled now with Dean/Cas? I’M LIVING!

But seriously. The rest is exactly what we, the audience needed to understand Dean and to show casual viewers Dean’s inner angst in order to understand the facade coming down, this is exactly what Dean needed. He has come full circle, this is the start of the culmination of the end of Performing!Dean (which Jensen has no said at Jibcon will be furthered in season 13!).

Dean actually TELLS Mary in his mind that he hates her, but that he loves her. That he had to be Sam’s mother and father, and that it wasn’t FAIR. This is so important, that he didnt just say that it happend and that it sucked, but that it wasn’t FAIR and that he did not DESERVE IT.

This is Dean addressing not just his mother but how HE feels about it, how he feels about HIMSELF, that he is saying that he DESERVES MORE and has SELF WORTH. 

These are all the words I have been using since 12x01 re: Dean . I’m so happy!

5. Ketch kills Toni, Mary kills Ketch after Dean beats him to a pulp, PERFECT, Jody kills Hess, again perfect.

This had to happen to keep our boys on the ‘don’t kill humans unless they HAVE to’ side, especially after Dean considered letting Toni go. Thank you.

6. Winchester family reunion 

Sam’s forgiveness of Mary, Dean’s reaction to the happy family hug (it’s great but someone is missing…). “Who we are… we kick ass. We save the world” 

Originally posted by fangirlingtodeath513

SAM AND DEAN ARE ACCEPTING THEMSELVES THIS SEASON. In 12x09 Sam said it, now Dean says it. After all the angst this episode and for Dean all season…

This whole episode was for me the culmination of the deconstruction of Performing!Dean this season, which has been the main theme carried through on the character - driven side of things, it was beautiful.

In many ways I view this as the character - led season finale and 12x23 as the plot - led season finale (which I will post my thoughts on right up next).

I cannot WAIT to see the result of this episode come across next season. 

We have not only now Performing!Dean pretty much dead or on his way out, the Dean Winchester is going to die metaphor was fully used and was fantastic, but coupled with Cas being brutally taken away from Dean, the parallels with 2 key canon romantic couples (Sam/Jess and Cain/Colette) in this within SECONDS of each other, plus the Jibcon revelations that we will see more of Dean’s reaction to this in season 13, apparently crying (and Jared not even hiding Destiel jokes now) make me pretty much 100% convinced Destiel is really endgame now.

Aside from this we now have Dean accepting himself, his internal self acceptance arc coming to a close, Sam’s MoL arc coming up and I will touch on the other aspects of the story for Sam in the next post as they are relevant to Lucifer / Jack, and Cas’s arc too…

Season 13 is already set up for exactly the endgame I am wishing for!

Tink’s Endgame Wishlist :

- Mol! Sam (and Eileen, Chuck I’m still bitter about that though, I really hoped her death would turn out to be a misdirection). Pretty much CHECK.

- Hunter / Mol collaboration with Sam and Dean as leaders. Pretty much CHECK.

- End of the brodependency, Dean acknowledging he was Sam’s parent and letting him go. CHECK.

- End of Performing!Dean. Pretty much CHECK.

- Human!Cas and self worth and belonging for his arc. TBA probably next season, what happened this season makes no sense if not to lead to this.

- Destiel. Pretty much CHECK. (And now after seeing Jibcon and the boys just joking about it all the time? Yeah, I don’t think they have an issue with this!).

- ALL THE RAINBOWS

unrivalled-in-sarcasm  asked:

Is there any relatively safe way to knock someone out with no resources but your hands? My character needs to knock this person out so they don't run off, but he has nothing on him to do so. It's necessary to the story that he be knocked out. Thank you!

No.

We’ve gone over this, many times, before. There is no safe way to knock someone unconscious. By definition, you’re specifically attempting to damage their brain, with the goal of getting it to take a little vacation.

More than that, there aren’t even many reliable means to knock someone out. Blows to the head can, theoretically, work, but they can also, just as easily, piss off the person you’re attacking, without much ill effect.

Tranquilizers take ages to kick in, and are very difficult to dose. Too much, and you’ve got a corpse. Not enough, and you’ve got someone who’s groggy, but still ambulatory.

Choking is, in theory, the safest, but the fine line between unconscious and dead is still something you can’t spot intentionally. Choking is something that can be practiced in a safe environment, but using it in the field is incredibly finicky.

And, it gets better.

Strip away all the terminology and a concussion is just bruising on the brain itself. You get hit, your head gets jostled around, and your brain bounces off the inside of your skull. You may have been using that organ for something, and might understand why you don’t particularly want it getting directly injured. Either way, this will, absolutely, interfere with your ability to think, remember unimportant information like your name, or count the number of fingers some well meaning smartass is holding up. Still, probably won’t knock you out, though.

When you’re talking about knocking someone out, you’re really asking, “how can I directly assault their brain, without having to develop psychic powers?” Yeah, that’s never going to be safe. It turns out, getting the human brain to stop working, temporarily, is a lot like trying to get it to just flat out stop working in general, and it’s a crap shoot, which you’ll get.

Concussions are cumulative. This should be fairly obvious, when you actually think about it. If your brain has been pre-tenderized, it’s going to be more susceptible to future concussions, and the ones you receive will be more severe. This means someone who’s had a few before will be knocked unconscious or killed far more easily than someone with a relatively healthy brain. Even then, it’s not like there’s a stable baseline of, “you can hit your head this hard before it kills you.”

Knocking someone unconscious for more than a few seconds is very bad news. If you’re knocking someone out for more than a minute, there’s going to be irreparable brain damage. (The specific threshold is usually around 30 seconds, but for each unique brain, there’s equally unique catastrophic brain damage.) So, you’ve, “safely,” reduced someone to a vegetable. More than a few minutes and you’ve (probably), “safely,” killed them.

So, what do you actually do when you need to be somewhere else and someone is intent on getting you to stick around? Knock them off balance and run. Sucker punches to the stomach are a good option. If unexpected, they’ll usually wind the victim, and give you a good head start. Knees to the gut are another classic. One common variation is to knee the gut, and when they double over, knee them again in the face. Slamming a door in the face, or knocking them to the ground are also excellent options. Really, there are a lot of options. The goal is to simply create an opening and escape. You don’t need to knock someone unconscious to do that. You really don’t want to knock someone unconscious to do that.

-Starke

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anonymous asked:

Can I request hcs with spin the bottle where the bottle lands on MC and a member of the RFA and V and Saeran? They're not dating though. I saw your thing about Jaehee. You don't have to do her if you're not comfortable:) Thank you for all your headcanons! They're so cute!

Thank you for being understanding! Hope you like these~ 


Zen:

  • After the RFA party, he asks you to become his manager
  • There was an after party after a final shoot, and you decide to go
  • A few people got a little tipsy and suggested a game of spin the bottle
  • It was all friends, so you didn’t really mind
  • You and Zen got separated from him thanks to some crazy women
  • So, you ended up sitting opposite of him in the circle
  • When it’s your turn, and you totally expect it to land on Weird Carl
  • Then the room erupts in chaos as people start “ooo-ing” and whistling
  • The bottle had landed on Zen
  • He gives a grin and scratches the back of his head
  • You’re a bit nervous about the idea of kissing him
  • Not that you didn’t think of it before
  • He gives you a small smile “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. It’s just a game.”
  • You awkwardly move your head towards him
  • Zen cups your cheek and gently presses his lips to yours
  • You think it’s going to be short, but to your surprise he lingers longer than needed
  • You remember that there’s people in the room, so you gently push him back before he started to get carried away
  • He apologizes and is about to walk away
  • You find your boldness “It’s okay. We can finish this later, right?”

Yoosung:

  • You both had a similar circle of friends at university
  • It was no surprise that you often got invited to the same parties
  • A few of your friends wanted to get away from the loudness of the large party
  • So, you went into another room and someone suggested spin the bottle
  • Yoosung gets a bit nervous because he’s never kissed anyone before
  • And moreso, you were there and what if someone else got to kiss you before he even had the chance to confess his feelings
  • The game was torturous
  • A few times, the bottle almost landed on you, but thankfully never did
  • By the time it was his turn, his palms were so sweaty
  • He barely taps the bottle because he’s shaking so much
  • It spins once and lands on the person next to him…which was you
  • He looks at you knowing he’s really red and wide-eyed
  • He’s stammering out an apology
  • “Why are you apologizing? It’s the point of the game!”
  • You lean forward and give him a small peck on the lips
  • RIP Yoosung
  • He doesn’t stop thinking about it all night
  • When he walks you back to your place, he accidentally ends up confessing
  • “I didn’t even get to kiss you properly because of the game,” he pouts
  • You smirk, “Well, you can try now?”

Jumin:

  • You were just visiting his penthouse after work one day
  • His father calls him and asks him to attend some office party last minute
  • He really doesn’t want to go alone, so he asks you and you accept
  • For a party of CEO’s, you really didn’t expect a game of spin the bottle to come up
  • Yet it did…both you and Jumin weren’t thrilled about playing and stayed to the side
  • Somehow, Mr. Han coerced you both to join in “for fun”
  • You wanted to get it out of the way, so you offer to spin first
  • Jumin was so caught up ranting about probability in these sorts of games that he didn’t realize the bottle landed on him
  • Suddenly he went quiet
  • You really didn’t want to do it, because you thought he didn’t like you in that way
  • You were caught off-guard when he walked up to you and stood expectantly
  • “Jumin, we don’t have to,” you start rambling. “If you feel weird about it–”
  • It was a surprise when he grabbed your face and kissed you full on the mouth
  • When he pulls away, you need a moment to catch your breath
  • “Oh, sorry? Was that too intense? I’ve been wanting to do that for awhile.”
  • He kept apologizing for it throughout the night
  • You kept telling him it was fine until finally you admitted you kind of liked it
  • Jumin’s just like “Well, if you liked it that much…”


Seven:

  • Neighborhood friend Tom invited him to a party
  • Oddly enough, he invited you too
  • When you got there…it was just the three of you
  • He sits you down in the living room and places an empty bottle on the table
  • He declares you three would play spin the bottle
  • And then abruptly says he needs to use the bathroom
  • But insists you two should still play
  • When Tom is gone, you and Seven just stare at each other before bursting into laughter at the ridiculous situation
  • You both figured out Tom had poorly attempted to matchmake you
  • Seven smirks and spins the bottle
  • There was no one else for it land on, so it points in your general direction
  • You get kind of flustered when he leans forward
  • Just as you think he’s going to kiss you, his head swerves to the side and he bites into an apple sitting in the fruit bowl behind you
  • “Your turn,” he adds with a wink
  • For fun, you spin it and you think it’ll land on the lamp on the other side of the room or something
  • It actually lands on him…dead accurate too
  • He teases you and leans really close to your face
  • Cue Tom coming in and “conveniently” running into the couch
  • The impact causes the distance between you and Seven to close
  • You both pull back immediately, blushing and flustered
  • Tom just ushers you out the door, thanking you for coming
  • You both agree it was the weirdest experience you’ve ever had
  • Although Seven chuckles, “So…wanna play that game again sometime?”

Saeran:

  • Seven dragged him out to an RFA and friends get together
  • He was a bit relieved to see you there
  • He was less relieved when Seven and Zen suggested a friendly game of spin the bottle
  • He was in the circle more to observe what was going on
  • Seven spun the bottle and it landed on you
  • He leaned forward about to kiss you when Saeran jutted out his hand, blocking it
  • After wiping Seven’s “kiss” off his palm in disgust….
  • He unexpectedly kissed you in front of everyone
  • He was super embarrassed afterwards and slipped out of the room
  • You followed him…mostly to ask what happened and if he was okay
  • He admitted he kind of got jealous
  • You smile and give a vague confession about your own feelings
  • You two continue the game…without the bottle

V:

  • Jumin invited you over to his penthouse for a small get-together with the RFA as well as some potential party guests
  • After at least one bottle of wine was finished, someone suggested to play spin the bottle with it
  • While a few people ducked out of the game, you decided it might be fun
  • V wants to be a good sport so he joins in
  • He can’t see though, so he finds the anticipation funny
  • It’s his turn to spin and suddenly people are giggling
  • He’s chuckling
  • “Who? Who did I get?”
  • You tap V on the shoulder and announce it’s you  
  • He breathes, “Oh good. I’m glad.”
  • Was that an indirect confession?
  • You have to initiate, so you cup his face gently and press your lips to his
  • It was short and sweet, but there was no denying a connection had been made
  • At the end of the night, he offers to see you home safely
  • And maybe asks you on a date

Check out our other headcanons~ Masterlist

tangled-headphone-cord  asked:

I don't understand why it's wrong to befriend wild animals, especially if one lives alone/far from human settlements ( like those wildlife rehab places where workers bond with the animals) so it's not like the animal endangers itself just by coming there, I often see brought up that the animals would lose fear of humans in general, but.. one, is that really a problem if they're in a reserve anyway? Two, how come it would work like that? I thought wild animals are way less trusting (part 1)

compared to domesticated animals. And from my experience with dogs - I have a dog who acts like a playful puppy with my family, I’m pretty certain would never hurt us on purpose but barks at strangers and even on walks will let out a serious growl if they get too close, tolerates the dog she grew up with and plays with her daughter but is pretty aggressive with other dogs. Do wild animals not make that “everyone who wants my trust needs to earn it individually” distinction?

(This is going to be a fairly passionate response. I’m not trying to be a jerk, OP, I just have a lot of feelings on this). 

Let’s start with the first thing that jumps out at me here: your use of the word “befriend”. Not “interact with”, not “feed”, not “pet”. “Befriend”.  You’re looking for not just interaction, but an affiliative type of contact that hits a specific emotional state of being seen and recognized as important. Which leads to an immediate question of: this is a wild animal. Why do you think it wants to be your friend? Why do you think an animal that is not domesticated, not tame, that lives in a kill-or-be-killed harsh natural environment would find it worthwhile out to take time out of survival to have a mutually reciprocal relationship with a hairless primate? Why do you assume a wild animal is capable of that sort of friendship? 

I have a lot of complicated feelings about this whole question, but it comes down to the fact that humans to have decided that we deserve the friendship and affiliative interaction of every single living thing on earth and that it is okay for us to completely modify an animal’s life to gain it. I fundamentally disagree with that assumption. Animals are not here for us. Wildlife is not here for us. We don’t have the right to stick our noses into the lives of animals simply because we get warm fuzzy feelings from getting close to them (and somehow not getting our faces ripped off as we rightly deserve most of the time for trying). Half the species we try to expect affiliative interaction from are solitary predators, and many others aren’t species even capable of affiliative social interaction. Biophilia - the innate need to empathize with non-humans animals - is one thing, and that’s all well and good, but we don’t need to interact with or touch everything to fulfill it; that comes out of a weird modern mental complex that since the world was made for humans, it is ethical for humans to do whatever the hell we like with and to it, and that since humans are inherently above/better than/different from animals our jurisdiction over the universe also extends to their lives. I do not think we are outside the natural order - I do not think we have the right to insert ourselves into the lives of wild animals simply for our personal pleasure. 

Why? Our “friendship” with wildlife gets wildlife killed, in the long run, almost every single time. Human influence on an animal’s life majorly changes their behavior, their space use, their survival strategies, and their ability to actually act like an animal. None of this is good for survival. 

Animals habituated to humans as a source of resources stay near human habitats, and are not only at a higher risk of being hurt by people or cars but are also at a higher risk of being euthanized for being pests. Animals that consider people save still have fight-or-flight instincts and will lash out at well intentioned humans when cornered and will get euthanized for being dangerous, if not because they actually bit someone and have to be tested for rabies. Animals used to eating human food will often choose to search for human refuse above normal foraging behavior, and some animals fed too much human food will forever have the microbiome of their guts changed and may starve to death once human food is no longer available since they can’t digest their normal forage anymore. Some animals brought up in close contact with humans will seek out their company over those of conspecifics, and never mate, or never learn how to hunt and feed themselves if the humans move on. 

You asked why this is a problem for people who are far from population centers, or animals that are with rehabbers or on preserves. For the latter, ethical wildlife rehabbers and people who run preserves have made a commitment to keep animals wild. To do their jobs correctly, they should want the animals to never want to be around them again, because they are attempting to preserve nature - not make friends. People who try to “bond” with animals they’re rehabbing are selfishly fulfilling their biophilic urges with behavior that has been proven to decrease the survival rates of the animals it is their supposed duty to help survive. 

To the former - why, say, if you live in a cabin in the middle of nowhere that you have to parachute in to and then hike thirty miles to get to, you shouldn’t feed the bears or raise squirrels to snuggle you - aside from all the ways that human influence lowers survival rates without necessarily needing human presence to persist, I will refer to the idea that humans do not inherently deserve animal friendship. In fact, they do much better when we just leave them the hell alone. 

What people love about animals is their wildness, their difference from us. We can engage in our biophilic urges to love them for being wild from a distance if we want to keep them the things we love - we devalue what they are when we try to force on them the idea that they should love us back. 

(Also, have you met a wild animal? They’re not nice. Those stories you see on social media about people befriending wildlife are so massively misportrayed and overstated that you’d think it happens daily, but most cases actually involve people getting hurt or scared out of their wits. So if you want to try to befriend animals. you need to be okay with the fact that most of them will be completely in the right to want to maul you for trying, because that’s what makes them wild).