night night ;)

She could almost see herself glowing much brighter than ever. 

And even though it was such a rare occurance, she could remember it very well while he approached — almost as if it was her own light, and not his. That burning sensation, that blinding light. Something lingering in the back of her head, like a feeling, or memory long lost.

She could only trap his light for a few moments. But she always felt that slight connection, as if something was amiss. 

Was he that mysterious, with his blue smile and sweet words? No. Maybe it was just her curiosity towards those moments. But deep down, she felt, there was something else, hidden between the cycles, waiting for them to find out.

There was something about them.

About him.

About her.

She could only wonder. But that didn’t mean she couldn’t enjoy that moment, even if for a little bit.

The Eclipse

I saw @illustraice AU some time ago and got hooked. What an amazing AU! so I decided to make a fanart about it cause yaaaassssss it’s so good ç~ç

The Fresh High Lady of The Night Court
  • Nesta: So Feyre, what's happened to you this past year?
  • Feyre: Now this is the story all about how My life got flipped, turned upside down. And I'd like to take a minute, just sit real tight, I'll tell you how I became the High Lady of the court of night.

You know what? I’ve never been happy that I’m gay. I may say that I’m happy with my sexuality when straight people ask me, but it’s because the truth is so much harder to explain. I’m not happy, because I would 100% in a heartbeat choose to be straight over being gay. It’s not easy to say, but I want to explain it. 

Ever since I was a small kid, my dream was to be a mum. I love the idea of carrying a child, of holding my flesh and blood in my arms. But now that idea stings because I know that child will grow up being judged because of me. Not only can I not protect my child from bullying, like so many parents wish they could, I have to know, even now, that through some twisted logic they are being punished for me.

I have to carry the fact that my love will always be a political act. Try as I might to divorce my love from that, it never will be. I don’t want to have to fight. I don’t want to have to defend myself. I want to be able to tell someone I love them and for it to mean that, and just that, and only that, and yet because I’m gay our love becomes more than just that. It becomes something for others to state their opinions on, for others to project their beliefs onto. My love becomes a case study, an example point for my friends, relatives, and mere acquaintances to whip out when they want to back up their ideas. 

I’m sick and tired of going online and seeing people complain about LGBT representation “flooding” their screens, tired of going outside and hearing the same feelings echoed, because every time that happens I am reminded that I am a token, not a person. My existence disrupts. I am a discomfort to others.

If I come out early in a friendship, they are uncomfortable because I am forcing my sexuality on them.

If I come out late in a friendship, they are uncomfortable because I withheld information so long.

There is no correct time, because no matter what I will make others uncomfortable.

I have never been happy with being gay, because I wish I could be a person, not a discomfort, not a political idea, not a debate. But I accept myself, and love myself.