Luke Skywalker (wow nice one)
Oh I want Kenobi
Quick Hon Jones
Jar jar blinks
Babbage the hut
But my favourite
Okay so it’s the new year and I’m drunk off me arse so I have the non-filterness to tell you some things about your boi Harold:
1. He’s 100% everything you think he is. Wildly awkward but you don’t care cos he’s Harry. This is equally annoying as it is endearing. His eye contact is out of control. You will feel like you are the center of the universe when talking to him. Don’t worry, this happens to everyone. Boy, girl, man, woman, plant, muppet, aluminium, banana… literally nothing is safe.
2. He’s got the humour of your grandad. Honestly. You think it’s cute? IT’S NAHT because he means it.
Which, FINE, can be endearing in its own weird way…but also, HARRY! LISSEN: you were born like two minutes ago… why you got the humour of an 87 year-old-man?
3. He loves attention. He humble AF cos the universe constantly humbling him, but also he loves this platform. He loves that you care. He loves that he makes a difference. And that truly is beautiful, Harry, cos lord knows he got what he always wanted and is doing good with it. He’s living his dream, He living his truth. And you feel compelled to live yours in his presence. And that’s respectable.
4. He smol. He tol, but also he smol. But you know it makes sense. And you hate him for being better and worse than you imagined and love him for being weirder than you gave him credit for.
The End. Happy New Year errbody. May 2017 be better for all of us, and may Harry’s summertime and butterflies all belonging to our creation be lit AF. 🙌🏼
It’s incredibly hard to find articles celebrating Zayn’s #1 debut without them also trying to diss One Direction for not having had a #1 yet. Just wise up already. One Direction and Zayn are on the same side and always will be, so there’s no point in trying to tear one down by comparing them.