Let us also hate the smaller details of the Pepsi ad

Everything about the new Pepsi ad is repugnant and insulting, okay? The two supporting characters to Kendall Jenner’s lead role are (A) a hipster cellist who beckons her to join a “protest” and (B) a hijab-wearing photographer whose moment of triumph is capturing a celebutante model hand a cop a can of soda. The cumulative effort is the single most repellent video I’ve seen since I watched an actual beheading.

But! Let’s not get bogged down in think-piece territory. There are lots of LITTLE things to hate about the video, too. And we should appreciate every terrible detail.

“Join the conversation” is a blank-box social media prompt. It is not something you would put on a sign for a public demonstration, even if that public demonstration were for something as nebulous and inoffensive as LOVE or PEACE. 

“Hey, you coming to the peace rally?”

“Yup, got my Join the conversation sign and some cans of soda.”

“Perfect, that is everything you need for a protest in free democracy.”


It started as a circle with a line through it, but there doesn’t appear to be anything inside the circle, because the people who made this commercial couldn’t take the chance of being actually AGAINST anything, even if they were going to slap a heart over it to show that love conquers all. 

NO HATE? Whoa, slow down! We’re pro-love, but we’re not anti-anything. Nazis can love, you know. And they deserve the fresh taste of Pepsi as much as the woke millennials whose business we so desperately crave.”

WTF? “JoTin The conversation”? Hey, the milquetoast invitation for discourse wasn’t half-assed enough, let’s shittify it an extra 15% with a nonsensical design flourish.

“Hey man, made that LOVE sign you wanted.”

“Looks like the lettering was too small the first time so you painted over it and gave it another go.”


“And the second time was also not large enough to fill the sign.”

“Listen, I didn’t have all day.”

Bullshit fucking fake-ass spacious protest. “We’re marching for peace … and elbow room!”

AD EXEC 1: Y’know, not ALL young people like protesting. Can some of them just be, like, eating pizza?

AD EXEC 2: Should they get up and join the protesters? It doesn’t really fit with Kendall’s narrative.

AD EXEC 1: Fuck no, they’ve got pizza. 

Kendall Jenner’s mind is blown as she sees middle-class people for the first time! 

KENDALL: Ew, what’s that smell?

PA: I believe that’s a mix of debt and diplomas.

KENDALL: What and what?

OH SNAP. Kendall has shed the artifice of wig and lipstick to join the FIGHT to, uh, join a discussion about love? I feel so empowered! And thirsty!

Welcome to the protest! Everyone’s marching with plenty of space on a pleasant day in Los Angeles, but we have a hydration station that may or may not dehydrate you (the science is still kinda iffy, don’t look it up).

What’ll it be? We have Pepsi, Silver Pepsi, Pepsi Blakk, and Pepsi in bottles. Just some ice chips? Okay, but they’re not water. 100% Crystal Pepsi.

Step back from this article for a second, dear reader. Place aside your immediate thoughts of the protester-police unity achieved by Kendall Jenner giving a handsome cop a Pepsi (even though there wasn’t tension between the crowd and the cops before this, because that would have taken some sort of narrative risk). Table, if just for a moment, the emotional and political flashpoints of Black Lives Matter, Blue Lives Matter, the Women’s March on Washington, conspiracy theories about paid protesters, and the increasingly fraught existence of basically everyone in America except for a small percentage of exceedingly wealthy people.

Consider, instead, the marketing team behind this. This was born in a brainstorming session, or perhaps in an executive’s mind as he watched a throng of angry, desperate people stand up for what they believe is right. This is a branding opportunity, someone thought, fanning the flames of a garbage can fire in Rome. 

If I can give Pepsi any credit here, it’s the notion that a pretty white girl born into money and fame is the best person to bridge the gap between protesters and police. We could have really used her in Ferguson. 

I’m sure she was busy.

Yeah, totally. Join the conversation.

If any of you are complacent with Kendall's willingness to participate in such a disrespectful video, PLEASE unfollow me right now.

This isn’t an issue of how shitty her modeling is or how bad her track record is on other things. She has never stood up for racial inequality; she has never spoken out on issues of police brutality; she has never crafted herself as anything other than a white, spoiled girl who gets things handed to her. And NOW she is the main focus on a horrendous video like the new Pepsi commercial? She hands a cop a Pepsi and suddenly! Police brutality and racism has vanished. It’s gross. If you condone it, I don’t want you in my following list. Like literally, get out. Go take your complacency and inadequate justifications for her privileged ass out of my followers. Thank you.

This new Pepsi ad featuring Kendall… I never cringed so damn hard in my entire life. Yeah, protesting is all fun and smiles, people dance, drink Pepsi, and wink at the cops. That’s a totally realistic depiction of how protests work. The worst part, though, is that Kendall had the audacity to pretend she actually gives a shit about anything else than herself. Sure, a white millionaire cares about our struggles. I mean, it’s especially evident in her history of participating in political activism, isn’t it? Let’s buy all Pepsi and hand them out to the cops. 

Vilde: Mari called, we got the bus for 300 000!!!!!!!!!!!

Noora: call and say we’re not getting it

Vilde: Sana said she’ll handle it, so she’ll handle it. Remember the toilet paper last year? She’ll handle anything! Sana is tha boss. Right Sana?

Sana: I’ll handle. That’s how we do it in my gangsterworld

Chris: faaaaaaakk
We’re going to Berlin tonight

Vilde: we? 😃

Eva: what do you think the new name for the Pepsi max girls are?

Chris: Sana, should we go together to gardis*?

Noora: “Norwegian party girls”

Sana: wtf? I’m not going to Berlin

Chris: aren’t we going to Berlin with the German class?

Eva: KUWTB - keeping up with the bitches

Sana: no

Chris: who the fuck am I going to Berlin with then?

Vilde: “sugar girls”

Eva: your history class maybe?

Noora: those girls are poisonous

*= Gardemoen, airport

Saturday 22.04.17 at 2.39pm

Translation by myself (and Google Translate)
Chat : “Olafia clinic” (Sana, Chris, Eva, Vilde, Noora)


Vilde: Mari called, we have the bus for 300 000*!!!!!!!!

Noora: Call her back and tell her we can’t buy it.

Vilde: Sana said she’ll take care of it, and she will. Do you remember the toilet paper last year? She can do anything! Sana is da boss. Isn’t it true, Sana?

Sana: I’ll manage. This is how we do it in my gangster world.

Chris: FUuuukkk
Chris: We’re traveling to Berlin tonight

Vilde: We? 😃

Eva: What do you think the new name of the Pepsi Max girls is?

Chris: Sana, should we go to the airport together?

Noora: “Norwegian party girls”

Sana: wtf? I’m not going to Berlin

Chris: Aren’t we going to Berlin with the German class?

Eva: “KUWTB - Keeping Up With The Bitches”

Sana: No

Chris: Who the hell am I going to Berlin with then?

Vilde: “Sugar girls”

Eva: Your history class maybe?

Chris: 🤔 

Noora: Those girls are toxic


*300 000kr = 32 850€, £27 460, $35 260    
Kendall Jenner's New Pepsi Ad Is So Tone-Deaf It Hurts

You missed the mark on this, Kendall/Pepsi. 

As an aside, it’s important to keep celebrities and influencers accountable for the products they endorse, and the company they keep. I’m sure Kendall was a part of the creative discussion behind this ad and was probably thinking this would speak to our generation but all it does is ooze privilege and I’m not here for it.

▸ Day 76 of the Trump administration
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North Korea fires ballistic missile as Trump, Xi prepare to meet
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People Are Seriously Pissed With Kendall Jenner’s New “Protest” Pepsi Ad
Barry Manilow comes out as gay and reveals partner of 39 years
▸ Today is National Walking Day and Gold Star Spouses’ Day

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here’s something to think about

Creativity is good for you. Make a post about a creative project you’re working on (or trying to get started on).

anonymous asked:

Woman comes in to get fuel and snacks. She walks past the Pepsi cooler and sees the new Pepsi Fire. Which is a cinnamon pepsi. She goes; OH HELL NO! AINT NOBODY ASK FOR THAT HOT SODA BULLSHIT. LORD YOU BETTER GET THAT DEVIL DRINK OUTTA HERE. needless to say I was dying

My son wanted to try it. To me personally it tastes like flat coke and Goldschläger. It was gross and he threw it away. And that was the first time he’s thrown a drink away. Even if he doesn’t like it he’ll drink it because he asked for it.